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This one was too long to paste, and so I am attaching it as a textfile. -Celeste Celestial Reviews 301 - August 26, 1998 Note: A man and a lady, married for 20 years, aren't happy with their sex lives. One night the wife comes home from playing bridge and says, "Honey, Betty told me about a new position. It's called the 69. You put your head at the south end of the bed and I put my head at the north end of the bed. Orally, we please each other." The husband agrees to try this position. During their session of 69, the wife passes gas, emitting a horrible stench. The husband doesn't think much of it and continues. A few moments pass and she does it again. The husband is gagging from the smell. He pats the wife on the ass and tells her, "Honey, I can't take 67 more of these!" Second note: A guy walked into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He put the alligator up on the bar and turned to the astonished patrons. "I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the 'gator will close his mouth for one minute. He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove my genitals unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink." The crowd murmured its approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth. The 'gator closed its mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on top its head. The 'gator opened its mouth and the man removed his genitals, unscathed as promised. The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks was delivered. The man then made another offer. "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try." A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar. A woman timidly said, "I'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle." Final note: Remember: even though someone else may be posting my reviews for me, my e-mail address is still Celeste801@aol.com. - Celeste

"Airport" by Unknown Author (satisfaction) 10, 10, 10 {Insufficient information to find link} Read Review Author Profile "Assignation" by Jane Urquhart (cyber-romance becomes real) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=383134004 Read Review Author Profile "A South Park Sex Story" by Leespam2 (cartoon sex) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=382912981 Read Review Author Profile "Sex in His Tent" by Glossy (slut goes camping) 7, 6, 5 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=383104871 Read Review Author Profile "In the Sand: The Saga of Ami and Sasha" by Ami and Sasha (cybersex becomes real sex) 7, 6, 6 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=384034273 Read Review Author Profile "Frustration" by Phil (tantalizing storytelling) 10, 10, 10 {Not Archived} Read Review Author Profile "We'll See What Happens" by Sven the Elder (unusual one-nighter) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=384366407 Read Review Author Profile "Until It Hurts" by Crimson Dragon (ff romance) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=382429137 Read Review Author Profile "Barley Legal Teens" by Bronwen (Romp in the Country) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=381524658 Read Review Author Profile "A Roll of the Dice" by Bernadette (cyberlovers meet) 9, 8, 8 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=380905014 Read Review Author Profile "The Masked Man" by Pipedream and Red Rose (1700s romance) 9, 7, 7 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=376997865 Read Review Author Profile "Latin Night" by Lostgirl (sexy dancing) 9, 7, 7 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=376723395 Read Review Author Profile "Sweet Milk" by Unknown Author (lactation sex) 6, 4, 4 {Unarchived} Read Review Author Profile "Night Swimming" by Vickie Morgan (sex at sea) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=378073650 Read Review Author Profile "Sevin & Dominic" by Mr. J (exhibitionism) 8, 8, 8 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=381511636 Read Review Author Profile "Castle Nursery" by Uther Pendragon (solstice orgy) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=384085732 Read Review Author Profile "Paint" by LeAnna (voyeurism & exhibitionism) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=383797538 Read Review Author Profile "Possession" by Eazin Along (consensual power exchange). BillyG: 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=376240419 Read Review Author Profile "Vantasy" by Jenn Till (rape). Myers: 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=383180607 Read Review Author Profile "The Airport" by Unknown Author (romantic tryst). BillyG: 10, 8, 8 Read Review Author Profile "The Beach1" by Jacques du Bois (Lesbian sex near the beach), Owl: 10, 10, 9 http://search4.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=381517151.1 Read Review Author Profile "The Beach" by Solange Lafemme (seaside masturbation). Ivan: 7, 8, 9 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=373022492 Read Review Author Profile "Friday Night Pickup" by Paris Waterman (stud service) Nick: 8.5, 8. 7 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=380904532 'The Friendly Couples" by Roger Grayson (swinging). Sven: 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=380909997 Read Review Author Profile "Beauty Is Iron" by Cobalt Jade (fairy tale sex). Emperor: 10, 10, 8 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=380905021 Read Review Author Profile "A Moment of Daydreams" by Mildred Whittemore (sexy dream sequence). Owl: 10, 10, 9 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=334437884 Read Review Author Profile "Miranda's Magic" by johnna@unixg.ubc.ca (romance). Gandmar: 10, 7, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=380892048 Read Review Author Profile "More Than Enough" by Unknown Author (gang bang) Gandmar: 8, 8, 4 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=377865835 Read Review Author Profile "The Shower Tales: Maureen" by Steve R. (sex with voyeurism). Ivan: 6, 6, 7 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=172389526 Read Review Author Profile "B.O.B. and Me" by Lostgirl (masturbation). BitBard: 10,10,10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=378056908 Read Review Author Profile * "Tales of the East Indies" by Sven the Elder (exotic sex) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=383797547 Read Review Author Profile * "Life Sentence" by Uther Pendragon (poetry - sort of) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=38328941 Read Review Author Profile * "My Juno" by Morgan Preece (flirtation) 9, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=383104840 Read Review Author Profile * "Art Class" by Mike Hunt (small group study session) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=383104833 Read Review Author Profile * "My Nipples Explode With Delight" by The Bear (transgender) 10, 8, 8 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=276630220 Read Review Author Profile * "All This for Only 79 Cents?" by The Bear (chaotic blowjob) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=274551223 Read Review Author Profile * "Look What I Did When My Boyfriend Left for the Weekend" by The Bear (humor) 10, 8, 8 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=274681716 Read Review Author Profile * "Barbie is Waiting" by R Rivers (spam contest) 8, 9, 9 {unarchived} Read Review Author Profile * "Young Dumb and Full of Cum" by Mike Hunt (spam contest) 10, 8, 8 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=278687389 Read Review Author Profile * "1997 Teen Blow Job Tournament" by Daphne Xu (oral sex) 9.5, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=279912118 Read Review Author Profile * "SPAM CONTEST" by Taria (spam contest) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=281162242 Read Review Author Profile * "The Morning After" by Tom Bombadil (spam contest) 10, 8, 8 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=285802333 Read Review Author Profile * "Tasty Young Coeds" by Johnny D (spam snuff) 10, 8, 8 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=293903296 Read Review Author Profile * "Letter Found Near a Suicide" by Mary Anne Mohanraj (unanswered love) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=177482824 Read Review Author Profile * "More Congenial Spot" by Mary Anne Mohanraj (emerging sexuality) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=177482828 Read Review Author Profile * "A Rude Awakening" by Michael Dagley (reformed virgin on a binge) 10, 10, 10 http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=272178107 Read Review Author Profile * "Elizabeth & Anastasia" by Tom Bombadil (ff romance) 10, 10, 10 http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1755.txt http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1758.txt http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1757.txt http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1759.txt http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1761.txt http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1741.txt http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1744.txt http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1743.txt http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year97/1745.txt Read Review Author Profile