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"Friday Night Pickup" by Paris Waterman (stud service)
Nick: 8.5, 8. 7
"Friday Night Pickup" by Paris Waterman (e-mail Nick@cassandra.demon.co.uk) This is potentially a very funny story, but it needs some more good lines. The story is the second of a series featuring the exploits of a guy called Warren. Warren is a kind of "Fonzie" character (from "Happy Days," if you can remember that), except that he is even more "over the top". Unfortunately he also takes himself far too seriously (or the writer does); and in the end, he turns out to be a rather unpleasant person. It starts with Warren appearing in his local bar and "captivating" everyone by singing to the barmaid. The jukebox is unplugged and the whole of page 2 is spent on the libretto of his song and how the crowd sings along with him. It may be a cultural thing and it maybe that we Brits are fundamentally miserable, but in one of our pubs, the unplugging of the jukebox would be greeted by at least one cry of "Oi, I was listening to that!". On completion of the song there would be several anonymous shouts of "Wanker!". We are told how handsome he is and there are references to his white teeth - presumably false, (I'm sure his real ones would have been knocked from his face ages ago). We are told how, on goosing "plain Janes" front bottom, she collapses with an immediate orgasm (instead of breaking yet another set of false teeth!). He eventually picks on Gail. She is the "lucky" person who gets to take him home, fist herself, enjoy anal sex and suck his shitty cock before being "educated" to the fact that she is bisexual by Warren, who somehow knew when she didn't! He likes her presumably because she is "feisty". We know this because she actually hesitates before going to the ladies to remove her panties so that he can sniff them and see if she "passes" his test. While in the ladies she finds it full of women listening at one of the booths to one of their number masturbating to Warren. When Gail gets a booth to herself, she is dignified enough not to be so loud about it (I think it's her seventh orgasm that evening, but I'm not sure). Well, there's a flavour of it. My own marks: Technique 7, Plot/Character 6, Appeal to me 8 (well I got some fun out of it, if only by writing this). Celestial Marks: Technique: 8.5 Plot/Character 8 Projected Appeal 7 'The Friendly Couples" by Roger Grayson (posted by TheEditor grobert@IDT.NET). ). Review by Sven the Elder, who may be contacted at Sven@brass-neck.demon.co.uk I guess all of Celeste's guest reviewers get blooded on a 50,000-word, close to 100 page blockbuster at some stage. {Celestial note: in the past, Celeste has asked me to review this one. I have to admit to finding it a pleasurable experience. This is the story of Janet and Greg Richards, and their new friends from the same Company, Martin and Darleen Kelly. Martin and Darleen have been planning the introduction of their new friends into a little bit of swapping. Greg has been working too hard and has been neglecting his slightly prudish, Midwest wife. Janet, has been starved of her love and affection, so when the newly promoted Greg has to fly suddenly down to Dallas on business and miss out on the party the four have arranged..... You get the picture, Darleen becomes unavailable and the scene is set for Martin to take a rather intoxicated Janet out on his own. The twists and turns of a furious seduction, powered by alcohol and 'an aphrodisiac' are well described, as is the blackmail that follows and the night of aphrodisiac fuelled sex that follows. The descriptions are excellent, if a little cliched in the way of other stories I have read that the 'Editor' has posted in the past. I have to say that having read those, this story follows in the same lines - wronged wife, seeking revenge against an uncaring husband, followed by remorse, followed by blackmail, followed by - well you get the picture and may well have read others in the genre. But - and this is a big but, this is a very well written story, in a good Style that is easy and entertaining to read and has some very sexy scenes in it. As a story the threads might well be taken from folks fantasies of how they would like this type of scenario to affect them, or not as the case may be. It also shows the downside of such relationship with what can only be described as a rather fraught homecoming to a very frightened wife, which changes as Greg admits to the reason for the blackmail. Now at this point I am not going to expose the plot any further. It twists and turns and goes deeper than you might imagine. There are dilemmas to suit all tastes. Sex scenes that come close to being over the top, perhaps they are, but they are still, in the main, enjoyable. The climax of the story, in every sense of the word is simply awesome. I enjoyed it all, even if there were a little more cliches than I would normally care for. Somehow, they worked. Ratings for "The Friendly Couples" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Sven (appeal to reviewer): 10 |