|
Return To The Index (This does NOT open a new window) Note, to make reading multi-part stories easier, story links (links with dejanews.com or www.qz.to, NOT the review or profile links) will open up a new browser window. When you are done reading the story, or section of the story simply CLOSE the story window. |
|
Celestial Reviews 306 - Sept 16, 1998 Note: Someone asked me what kind of stories I look for and what kind I try to avoid reviewing. Let's start with the negative side. I almost never review stories like these: (1) Stories by people who have asked me not to review their work. At the present time, there are only two of these people. It seems that most other authors feel either that (a) I am fair, (b) any attention is better than no attention, or (c) it's a free world and I can do what the heck I want to do anyway. (2) Stories with really illiterate title lines. I realize people make typographical errors, but first impressions are important. There are just too many good stories out there for me to waste my time on apparent crap. (3) Stories written by authors with a poor track record. If I have read two or three stories by an author and not enjoyed these, I have better things to do than to read more stories by that author. If you used to write bad stories but have improved, maybe you'd like to email me a copy of your current work. (4) Stories that are obviously unfinished. If you post a story as (1/?), I'll almost certainly not read it. However, I am likely to keep an eye on it and wait until it is finished. When I eventually see (8/8), I will be more inclined to download it. I appreciate it when authors who post in series send me the whole story in a single file when they post the final segment. In fact, I am right now hoping that an author whose name begins with S and who often writes excellent stories will send me her most recent work, so that I can avoid downloading multiple parts one at a time. (5) Lengthy series by authors I don't recognize, even when they are finished. I just don't have time to chase false leads that take up too much of my time. I hasten to add that I have missed a lot of good stories by employing this criterion. I appreciate it when someone calls good but long stories to my attention. (6) Stories written in the second person – that is, "you" narratives. These stories are most often written by one person for a specific other person. These two people may find special meaning in the story, but outsiders can usually find little interest in them. I have been burned so often by these stories that I automatically move them to my Mac's trash can as soon as I realize I am reading one of them. If you write a story that your cyberlover really likes, simply have the courtesy to revise it and to reorient it toward an audience that extends beyond the one person for whom you originally wrote it. Otherwise, keep it as your lovely little secret. (7) Stories on topics that I find to be distasteful, unless the author sends the story to me with a request for a review. For example, people who write pedophile rape stories are probably decent people whose fantasies happen to differ from my own. I have known real people who have been hurt by such activities, and I have a hard time thinking that this kind of thing can ever be "fun." I suspect that the people who like these stories are imagining different scenarios than I picture; therefore, I don't dislike or preach against these people: I just don't read their stories unless they ask me to do so. Examples of topics that I find to be distasteful include pedophile rape, child/adult incest, watersports, cruel bdsm, and snuff. I find many "furry" and bestiality stories to be boring rather than distasteful. Transgender stories are often absolutely ingenious, but I can take only so many of them a month; and some TG stories give concrete meaning to the word banal. Fan fiction is often a turn-off to me, when I am not a fan of the fiction. (8) Stories about male homosexuality. Nothing personal here – the few that I have reviewed have received high ratings. I'm just swamped with hetero and ff stories, and mm stories just aren't often a sexual turn-on to me; and so I tend to skip right past them. Having stated what I said in the preceding paragraph, I hasten to point out that I have given extremely high ratings to stories in each of the categories that I said I usually reject. I am constantly trying to learn and to expand my horizons, and I appreciate it when an author enables me to experience something that I would otherwise not try. It just has to be good writing. (9) Stories that appear to be illiterate – for example, if they contain numerous grammar errors. Actually, what I do with these is go ahead and read them and just write a negative review, and then try to avoid that author in the future. Nevertheless, I agree that some authors who superficially appear to be poor writers are actually creative writers with rough edges. I try to coordinate a free proofreading service for people with this problem. I know that almost everything on the Internet that is labeled free is actually a rip- off, but this proofreading service is a genuine exception. If there is someone who feels he/she has been mistreated through this proofreading service, I don't know about it. Likewise, if you'd like to be a proofreader, please contact me. On a more positive note, here are the kinds of stories I DO try to review: (1) Stories that authors email to me with a request for a review. (2) Stories labeled with an <*> in the a.s.s. or a.s.s.m. postings. (3) Stories by anyone who serves as a guest reviewer for Celestial Reviews. I try to review these myself, but there are often so many that this becomes impossible. (4) Stories that "catch my eye" with a creative title. I normally download these stories, read the first few paragraphs, and then trash them if they fail by one of my "negative" criteria. (5) Stories by authors with a good track record. In reality it is impossible for me to read all the stories that "good" authors publish. At the risk of offending people whom I may accidentally omit, I am going to repost below the list of my "favorite authors" from my FAQ: A. Van Peebles Alan Mathews Ann Douglas Anne Arbor Anon 747 (Anne 747) Backrub Bazarov BEAR The Bear (also referred to as the New Bear and Baird Allen) Bernadette BillyG (William Hayden) Bitbard (formerly Sandman) Bluelady Bronwen Celeste (C'est moi!) Cobalt Jade Crimson Dragon D.A. Ignatius (DarkNites) Dafney Dewitt Damya deirdre (Sherwood Anderson) Delta DG Dirty Dawg (Dawson Rambo) DJ (the artist formerly known as DJ810) Dorvis Slaughter Dr. Watson Dulcinea Ed Stauff El Sol Elf Sternberg Eli the Bearded Emerson Laken-Palmer Erostos Estragon fcp Friar Dave G Smith Gina Marie Green Onions H.D. Meister Hawkeye Jackie Janey (Jane Urquhart) Javahead Jim Fix Joe Parsons John Thomas Jonathan Dzoba Jordan Shelbourne Kim kollontai LeAnna Linda B. Lori Grenci Losgud Lord Malinov Lysander Mark Aster (Allen Sisters Stories) Mark Bastable Mary Ann Mohanraj Mary Jorsay Gandmar Mat Twassel Mercury Michael Dagley Michael K. Smith MicahelD Michelle Lurker Mike Hunt Morgan Preece Ng Sisters (Deidre & Tammy) Nick Observer OddManOut Anywhere Oscar Paco Paddy Toute Parker Patrick Donovan Peter V. Principle Phil Phantom Plainman PleaseCain Poison Ivan Pulp Fan R.C. Rajah Dodger Ramapo Renae Nicks Rhett Dreams Rocket88 Rondu S. Leigh Farmer SandMan (currently Bitbard) Santo J. Romeo (Author of Martha Jane) Sarlim Saucy Wench Seurat Shelby Bush Simon bar Sinister smoot2 Spook Stephanie SueNH (also WithSue) Summer's Rose Sven the Elder Taria TEX Thomas M. Carvett (TMC) Tom Bombadil Tom in Sacramento Tom Trinity Tooshoes Uncle Mike Uther Pendragon Vickie Morgan Vickie Tern Walter Slaven Watcher Wollstonecraft Almost any story by one of the above authors is likely to be a winner. In addition, here is a second list. The main difference is that I have read fewer stories by these authors and therefore cannot guarantee their quality as well as those on my first list: Alan C. McD Anglokitty Artie Bill Green Bobbi Sue Brother Cadfael Caesar Calloway Daniel Shechori Darkside Darryman Dave Schulte David L David Shaw Deb Atwood Dimitri EazinAlong EzRiter empath Eric Shon Frank McCoy Gordie D Gregarious Grimbo Hangten Hawk Richards Horangi Horny Toad I Robert J Boswell J.M. James Dawson Jan Williams Jefferson James Jon Hallmark Jonboy Kid Dynamite Kona LM1 Lostgirl mandible MD James Morpheus' Twin MrSpraycan Niles Naismith Nom de Plume Of 2 minds Ovid Pan Paris Waterman P.D. Michael PJ Rainman Richard Baudouin Rock Hancock Roger P. Tipe Rojack Sarah Fox Jahn Sandmann SexySailor Sfmaster Sista Shakespeare Solo Polyphony Spoonbender Steve3925 Steve Black TropicCool TruthHurts Walter Fortner Warthog Wolfgang Amadeus Zhong Second note: Here's something from the Amazing Insights Department. If you have Microsoft Word, follow these steps: Step 1 : Go to Microsoft Word & type this sentence "Unable to find a girlfriend" (without the quote) Step 2 : Highlight this sentence, then press Shift+F7 or go to Tools & select Thesaurus. Step 3 : Look at the highlighted item in the alphabetical list of suggestions to find the explanation for the problem you have just stated. Final note: Remember: even though someone else may be posting my reviews for me, my e-mail address is still Celeste801@aol.com. - Celeste |