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"20th Hole" by MotionMan (neighborly sex). Sundance: 9, 7, 8
http://www.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=389691133 ---
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/15130.txt


"20th Hole" by MotionMan (Motionman@hotmail.com). Guest review by Sundance.

This was an entertaining story of Steve Matthews; best friend, golfer, and all
around handyman being called upon to assist the extremely attractive orphaned
daughter of his former best friends during an unexpected plumbing crisis.

The author scored immediate points with me by addressing in this tale my
favorite things -- golf, beautiful women, spicy story situations, cold beer,
and a touch of romance. Being that this is my first guest review, I was
starting to wonder if I was being setup.

I especially enjoyed the rich descriptions the author used to evolve the
story. The time he took in reference to characters and the supporting
background to the situation helped to develop an overall plot and provided
more than just the ‘fix the sink, do the daughter' genre.

I did find the descriptions of the sex to be a bit exhaustive and the pace a
bit rushed. I would have preferred a little more dialogue between the
characters up front that emphasized their underlying friendship /
relationship, as much as the physical attraction. This would have allowed the
reader to deduct the growing sexual tension and romantic interests that
existed between the main characters without having to spell it out.

All in all, I found this a pleasurable read and a fine first effort. I look
forward to more stories from MotionMan. Now he just needs to explain what
happened at the 19th hole.

Rating for "20th Hole"
Technical Quality: 9
Plot & Character: 7
Appeal to Reviewer: 8