Dominance and submission: The very phrase evokes images of steel-collared vixens in black latex worshiping the manhood of a chisel-cut Master in black leather; of harems full of Gorean dancers, undulating seductively for the surrounding men, the delicate tinkling of their bells and chains mixing with the soft thwush of their sheer silk skirts; of whips and screams and forced sex, of women as usable toys, and boys in gimp suits; of sexual perversions and sexual violence. And those images are wrong. The relationship of a Master and a slave is one built on trust, communication, devotion, and desire. It is a relationship akin to that of teacher and student--a relationship of teaching lessons, gaining experience, and developing skills which serve both Master and slave throughout their lives.

From the very start, it must be stated that a Master does not take a slave--as a kidnapper takes a victim--but accepts her as a mentor accepts an apprentice. A D/s relationship is, above all, a relationship. It's about interaction between two people. As such, it will become a creature unto itself, growing, changing, thriving, and perhaps dying. There is no set of rules that can unfailingly instruct a Master on how to train his slave. There are, however, philosophies, goals, techniques, and outlines that will guide both Master and slave along the path they choose. What is written here is based on the premise that the pairing of Master and slave is consensual, desired, and oriented towards the goal of refining and shaping the skills and actions of both.