This short story is an entry in the 2002 Soc.Sexuality.Spanking Summer Short Story Contest and is copyright by the author and commercial use is prohibited without permission.  Personal/private copies are permitted only if complete including the copyright notice.  The author would appreciate your comments

Category:  Parody/Poetry   Based on a song by Freddie Mercury & Queen.
 

Bohemian Whapsody

By

Mara Maharakshasa <MaraMahaRakshasa@aol.com>

Is this the slut life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught with my pants down
No escape from brutality
Open my legs
Look up my pussy and see
I'm just a poor girl, I need no sympathy
Because I'm easy come, easy go
A little slut, very low
Anywhere the strap lands, doesn't really matter to me, to me

Mama, just thrilled a man
Puts his dick against my head
Pulls my clittie, till I'm dead
Mama, life has just begun
I promise I won't throw this all away
Mama, ooo
Didn't mean to make me cry
But if I'm not sore again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters

Too late, my time has come
Sends trickles down my leg
Body's aching, makes me beg
Goodbye everybody - I've got to come
Gotta show you my behind and face the blow
Mama, ooo - (anyway the strap lands)
I don't want to die
I sometimes wish I'd shaved my pussy bald

I see a little fat perverto of a man
Pussy douche, Pussy douche will you wank me off and spank me?
Thunderbolt and lightning - very very frightening me
Fellatio-oh, Fellatio-oh,
Fellatio-oh, Fellatio-oh,
Fellatio Anilingo - Cunnilingo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oooohhhhh

But I'm just a poor slut nobody loves me
(She's just a poor slut from a perv family)
Give her a poke with your monstrosity
Easy come easy go - will you let me go
Trish Miller! Ow!!! - we will not let you go - let her go
Trish Miller! We will not let you go - let her go
Trish Miller! We will not let you go - let her go
Will not let you go - let me go (never)
Never let you go - let me go
Never let me go - ooo
No, no, no, no, no, no, no -
Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go
That big fat slob has a dildo polished up for me
for me
for meeeeeeee...

So you think you can spank me and come in my mouth?
So you think you can fuck me in Canada and all points South?
Oh baby - can't do this to me baby
Just gotta spanked - just gotta get spanked on my rear

Ooh yeah, ooh yeah
Nothing really matters
Anyone can see
Nothing really matters - nothing really matters to me

Anywhere the strap lands...

The End

© This parody is copyrighted (c) by Mara Maharakshasa, 2002. All rights are reserved by the author. Do not retransmit, store (except for personal use) or publish without permission.

Reviews

John  <johnb(at)ssec(dot)wisc(dot)edu>
I loved Queen.  Any local group that tries to cover Queen has to have balls of brass.  And the ones who pull it off are vocally stunning.

This is a parody of a parody, of course, as the original was a parody of A Night at the Opera.

Quite good, delighfully slutty, and the meter is matched so very well that the one time I stumbled might be a difference between my ideolect and the author's rather than any shortcoming on her part.

There is a good deal of incoherance in the story line, of course.  As there was in its original.  And in its original.

Louise  <louise(at)nunn58(dot)freeserve(dot)co(dot)uk>
I found this really funny and even sang along to it in my head! Very clever use of words and splendid idea. Well done !

Sophie  <bad_soph(at)hotmail(dot)com>
I always like parodies because they are so much fun to read (and, I admit, sing <g>). This is very creative. I've heard the original song before and never would have been able to write something like this based on it. Good job. I would love to hear this played on the radio sometime!

Kate  <ecattiva(at)aol(dot)com>
Very good title! Creative and juicy parody of the original. The girl's need for something is particularly well done - it is very easy to imagine and understand her frustration.

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