Chapter Five

Niki was in the kitchen the next morning when Sabrin rolled out of bed and came downstairs, after his shower. He was still brooding about how lonely the shower had been, so he was not in good spirits.

"Good morning," Niki said, cautiously. She watched him, trying to gauge his mood.

"Morning," he answered. It was not a good one and he was not holding out much hope it would improve.

"I made the doctor's appointment, Sabrin. It’s for 3:00 this afternoon. Do you want to go with me?" she offered.

He was just about to say an adamant "No!" when he thought better of it. He had to make sure she was not trying to pull one over on him.

"I'll go," he told her and went back to ignoring her.

The day was dragging on so slowly that Sabrin was sure all of the clocks in the house had stopped. He tried to find things to do to keep him occupied but he could not ease the fear he could lose Lyssa. Finally, it was time to go for the doctor's appointment. As they drove, Niki tried to make conversation with Sabrin but the most she could get for responses were "yes", "no" and the occasional grunt. When they arrived Niki checked in at the reception area and was given a small plastic cup and a test-tube. She headed to the bathroom to supply a sample for testing. The waiting room was quite crowded so 3:00 came and went. They sat silently waiting for Niki's name to be called. It was a little past 4:00 when they were finally shown in to an exam room. The doctor came in fifteen minutes later to speak to them.

"Niki, Sabrin, it's nice to see you both again. I see you have come in for a pregnancy test, Niki," the doctor smiled, oblivious to the tension in the room. The doctor flipped through the report he had received from the lab. "Well Niki, it would appear your test came back as inconclusive."

"Inconclusive? What does that mean?" Sabrin could not believe what he had heard.

The doctor began to ask Niki a number of questions about when her last period was and other things that could indicate a reason for the results.

"I want you to come back in ten to fourteen days for another test, Niki,” the doctor advised. "It's possible that if you are pregnant, you’re not far enough along to get an accurate test result. Make another appointment on your way out and I'll see you then."

It took everything Sabrin had to not jump to his feet and shout ‘Two weeks!’ How the hell was he supposed to wait two weeks when one damned day had been agony? The word that almost did escape his lips next was ‘Lyssa’. The rest of the time in the doctor's office and the drive home was all a blur for Sabrin. Niki continued to try and engage him in conversation, but he barely noticed. Once they arrived home though, she decided she would no longer be ignored.

"This is not easy for me either, you know. I wasn’t the one who did the grabbing that night! You were all over me and now you act like I've tried to trick you into something!"

This stopped Sabrin dead in his tracks. He was again confronted with the fact that his desire for Lyssa had bubbled over New Year’s Eve and this, combined with the drinking, had caused him to use Niki as a replacement for the woman he had really wanted.

Sabrin did not move for what seemed like minutes. He just stood there staring into space. When he finally did make a motion, he turned to Niki. She knew from the look on his face he was gathering his thoughts before he spoke.

"I don't know what to think right now. The only thing I do know for sure is that I don’t want a child. Not now, not ever. I'm meeting Paul for dinner. I don't know how late I'll be.” Before she had a chance to respond, he was out the door.

The Elephant & Castle was a combination restaurant/pub, which the cast of ‘Time and Space’ had used as a gathering place since the first year of the series. They had spent almost as much time there as they had at the studio - holding meetings, celebrating and just getting together for casual dinners. Because of this, the restaurant management accorded them with many perks for their loyalty to the establishment even after they all had become “big stars”.

It took Sabrin about 45 minutes to get there so he still had another 45 minutes to wait before Paul was due to arrive. He ordered a beer in the pub and nursed it until he saw his friend come in the door.

“You look like hell," Paul said as soon as he saw Sabrin.

"There’s good reason for it," Sabrin admitted. They moved to a table in a private section of the restaurant where a waiter came at once to get Paul a drink. Sabrin filled Paul in on the events of the day and Paul gave a soft whistle.

"Two weeks? Do you have that picture of...Lyssa, was it? Let me look again so I can be sure to keep you away from women who resemble her." Sabrin nodded, but looked inconsolable.

"I've never met anyone like her before. She just smiles at me and I want her so badly I'm practically insane. She's funny, caring and has almost no interest, as far as I can tell, in money."

"That's a change. Niki sees dollar signs every time you walk into the room."

"Don't I know it."

It helped Sabrin to be able to talk about the situation with his friend. It was killing him keeping all this inside.

"Have you told Lyssa about Niki possibly being pregnant?" Paul asked.

"No. I'm only going to tell her if it turns out Niki is pregnant. Damn, if Niki is I know she won't even consider any options. I know how Lyssa will react too, Paul. She'll end our relationship if Niki is pregnant. This is an absolute nightmare." Sabrin buried his head in his hands.

"The timing almost makes it sound like a bad omen," Paul observed.

"I must have pissed off some god, somewhere. I find the woman of my dreams and get myself into a situation that’s going to keep me from her all at the same time."

The two continued to talk, Paul tried to steer the conversation away from the trouble after awhile and that seemed to help, but once Sabrin had left the pub, the panic began to descend again.

It was after midnight by the time Sabrin returned to the house. The lights were all off when he pulled up. He made his way to the guest room and collapsed on the bed. He was overcome with exhaustion brought on by the stress and panic he had been feeling. He fell asleep immediately still wearing all of his clothes. He was asleep for only a few hours when something startled him. He opened his eyes to see Niki sitting at the edge of his bed. She was in a long, wine coloured nightgown that set off her waves that flowed to just above her small breasts. He could see she was trying to entice him even before she spoke. 

"Sabrin, when are you going to come back to our bedroom?"

"Do you have any idea what time it is?" he asked, still groggy.

"What is wrong with you? The way you have been behaving since you got back from New York. Your reaction to my possibly being pregnant isn’t right," she accused.

It was dark, so Sabrin reached over and turned on a bedside table lamp. When he looked back to Niki, he felt bad. Her eyes were red and puffy. She had obviously been crying.

“I don’t know how you expected me to react, but-“

“Not like this,” she interrupted, with a pout. “You act like you think it’s not yours. I haven’t been screwing around on you. Is that what you think?” She was crying again.

“No, I don’t think that,” he admitted. He reached over and reluctantly pulled her into his arms to comfort her. She melted into him. “I know I haven’t said it in a while, but I love you,” she said between sobs.

Hearing Niki say that had a chilling effect on Sabrin. He knew she was expecting him to say he loved her but he did not. He had not for quite a while. The best he felt he could do was to apologize for being so cold to her.

"I'm sorry I’ve upset you. I've been under a lot of stress recently dealing with producers and casting people and now this."

Niki, wiping the tears away from her eyes, stood up. "Please come back to our bedroom," she said, holding out her hand hoping he would take it and come back to their bed.

“I think it would be best if I stayed in the guest room, Niki.” She turned and walked out, slamming the guest room door as she left.

Sabrin felt bad. He did not want to hurt Niki; he just wanted this to be over. He was sure his career would take a hit if he left Niki, but he could not live like this. Before Lyssa had broken into his room, Sabrin had been content to just go along as things had been, but now... He and Niki would have sex maybe once a week, and they did not laugh much in or out of bed. He had his friends and she had hers, but she also had his credit card and that made her happy. Sabrin had the influence of her family and a beautiful woman on his arm at parties, so he had thought he was happy, but Lyssa changed all that. He did not want to be roped into staying with a woman he no longer loved instead of building a loving and strong relationship with a woman he did. He rested back against the headboard of the bed and wondered what he would do about this possible baby. He knew Niki would not even consider abortion as this was abhorrent to her, and her family’s, beliefs. Plus if his mother found out, she would kill him. If she was pregnant and he told her he wanted to end it, what would she do? Take him to the cleaners for one.

But it sure seemed as though Lyssa was not interested in his money. Maybe he should really put that theory to the test by living cheaply the next time they were together and seeing how she reacted... if there was a next time.

He decided to put that last thought out of his mind. There had to be a next time, no matter what happened with Niki. He decided the only way he would be able to keep his sanity would be to try not to think about Niki's possible condition until the next test. He changed into his pajamas and fell back to sleep.

The next morning was only slightly better than the day before. Sabrin was dressed and in the kitchen having a cup of coffee when the phone rang. Picking up the extension in the kitchen, he immediately recognized the voice. It was Mark Rice calling about the play.

"Hi Sabrin, it’s Mark Rice. I hope I'm not calling too early. I can never remember the time difference between New York and LA,” he laughed.

"Oh no, it's not too early," Sabrin assured him with a chuckle.

"Great. I'm calling about the part we’d discussed. It's yours if you want it."

Sabrin let out a silent sigh. "I want it."

"Great. The rehearsals begin at the end of this month, like I told you. I’ll overnight a copy of the play to you by Fed Ex today. It’ll be great to work with you, Sabrin. It’s been a while.”

“Thanks, Mark. I’m looking forward to working with you again too.” The two men hung up and Sabrin found he had a smile on his face that had not been there since the last time he had spoken to Lyssa. Even talking to Paul had not caused him to smile much. Sabrin hung up the phone on the counter and turned to find Niki staring angrily at him.

“So, is this baby a blessing in disguise? Is this how I find out that you and I are not what I thought we were?” she asked, hands on hips.

Sabrin’s smile quickly left his face. "Maybe it is. I find it difficult to believe that you’ve not noticed what’s been happening between us for the past few years, or what’s not been happening. We've been drifting apart for a long time and a baby isn't going to reverse that."

Niki was surprised by his words. It was true she did not feel as close to Sabrin as she did at one time but she had not been unhappy.

"I thought we were okay, Sabrin. I still love you."

"Is okay all you want, Niki? I think we both deserve better than okay."

What he said made sense, but she had been probing for confirmation of one thing and she was not going to be satisfied until she knew one way or the other.

“Do you still love me?” she asked, a pained expression on her face. She still had a pretty face. He had once loved this face. It had been a contented kind of love. But not now and he was not about to lie to her.

“No. You have been the pretty woman on my arm for years, but not my love."

Niki was stunned by this revelation. She had no idea he felt this way about her, their relationship. She stared at this man in front of her wondering who he was. What had happened to the man she had known and fallen in love with so many years ago?

"I just got off the phone with Mark Rice. I'll be going to New York at the end of the month to start rehearsals for ‘From My Balcony’. We'll have the test results before I go," he informed her.

"And if it’s negative you want me out, don't you?" She was almost spitting the words at him. Sabrin hesitated a moment, but slowly nodded. “I can’t believe this! If I’m pregnant, it’s your fault! You were like a man possessed. It was like it was fourteen years ago and we’d just-“ Niki’s hands flew to her mouth. Her eyes went wide as she suppressed a gasp. “There’s someone else, isn’t there?”

"Whether I've met someone or not is irrelevant to this situation. We’re talking about you and me. We've been going through the motions for years in our relationship. There's no passion, no love anymore. We're practically strangers," he spoke solemnly.

"Irrelevant?! I don't think you screwing some bimbo is irrelevant. How long has it being going on ...years?" she spoke accusingly. "Is she the first whore you've had or have there been others?"

Sabrin was seething. He hated the names she was calling Lyssa but he still felt nothing for Niki. Hatred would mean passion and neither emotion was present when he thought of Niki.

"Damn it, Sabrin. I want to know now! Is there someone else?”

“Would it make it easier for you if there was?” Sabrin asked her. “Would it give you a good reason to indignantly walk out? Would it help you save face to walk out on the cheating bastard? I’ve never gone looking for an affair. If I’d wanted to, I could have screwed the brains out of at least three other women on New Year’s Eve but I didn’t,” Sabrin glared right back at her.

“Then why are you wanting to end it? Why so sudden? I don’t believe it’s a baby we don’t even know exists yet.”

"Sudden need!?” he shouted, incredulously. “It isn't sudden. Niki, our relationship has been dying for years. This pregnancy scare only makes matters worse. Even if I wanted to have children, I certainly wouldn't want to bring a child into a relationship that's dead." His words sounded harsh but he knew it was the truth.

Niki glared at him before she finally spoke. "You still haven't answered my question. Is there someone else? I want to know now!" she demanded.

“Do you really want to know?” he asked, getting right in her face. His temper took a lot to get hot, but she had just done it. Niki recoiled slightly, but her own temper had flared once it hit her that his question all but confirmed he was indeed seeing someone else.

“You bastard!” she screamed and moved to strike him. Sabrin caught her wrist just in time.

“How long?” she asked between clenched teeth. Sabrin released her arm, pushing it away from him.

“Not long at all.”

“How many?”

“Just this one.”

“Get rid of her!” Niki demanded.

“No,” he said, again in her face.

"You son of a bitch!" she screamed. "How could you do this to me, to us?"

"Niki, I didn't plan this. It happened and I'm not giving her up for you, for anyone. What we have is over. It's over, Niki. Do you understand?” His voice was very calm now as he spoke to her.

"I hate you. I hate her. How could you do this?" She was crying now.

"You probably won't believe this, but I'm sorry. I'm sorry you've been hurt by this."

"Liar!" she snarled before running to the bedroom, slamming the door behind her.

Sabrin was not sure whether or not to feel relieved or sad. He had officially just put the last nail in the coffin of his relationship with Niki. She would never trust him or, most likely, even smile at him again. He was glad he did not have to pretend, but he had hoped to be able to end it in a civil manner that would not hurt Niki so much. This baby had destroyed that plan. Sabrin decided it would be a good idea to get out of the house and give Niki her space. No need to push her. He grabbed his cell and his coat.

Niki was still in the master bedroom, so he knocked on the door softly, telling her he was going out for a while to let her have some time alone. He would be back around 1:00. There was no reply.

As soon as Sabrin was outside, he pressed the speed dial button to call Paul. He was relieved to hear his friend's voice on the other end of the line.

"Paul, it’s Sabrin. Are you busy?"

Paul could tell something was terribly wrong. "Why don't you come to the house? Deborah is going to be gone all afternoon. We can talk privately here."

"I'll be there in half an hour. Paul, thanks."

"That's what friends are for, Sabrin."

It took Sabrin a little longer than 30 minutes to reach Paul's home. When Paul greeted Sabrin at the door he could tell it was worse than he had thought.

"Come in. You look like you could use a drink."

"That's an understatement."

Paul handed Sabrin a beer. "Now tell me, old friend. What's happened?”

"Niki started an argument and it ended with me telling her there was someone else. Saying she did not take it well would be another understatement. She called me a bastard and took a swing at me."

Paul’s eyes got wide.

"She hit you?" he asked, looking for a mark.

"She didn't land it. I caught her hand."

"What are you going to do now?" Paul asked.

"Wait it out and live in hell for two weeks. After that, it depends on her."

"Sabrin, I'm going to be in town for the rest of the month. You know you can call me any time if you need to talk. Now, are you going to tell Lyssa that Niki knows about your relationship?" Paul asked.

"I don't know. I-I'm going to have to. I'd rather do it in person but...I can't lose Lyssa. I don't know what I would do if I lost her."

Paul was quite worried about Sabrin so he managed to convince him to stay the afternoon and have dinner with him and Deborah.

"I haven't told Deborah about this, just so you know," Paul informed Sabrin, before his wife got home.

"Thanks."

Sabrin did not make it home until after midnight but, as soon as he pulled into the garage, he knew something was going on. Niki's SUV was not there. He went into the house and looked around. Things just felt wrong. He went upstairs and found the master bedroom to be a shambles. Clothes were thrown around the room and some had been ripped and torn. Sabrin was not surprised to see these articles all belonged to him. On the bed, he found a brief note lying on top of a pillow.

"Gone to my parents’. I will be back for the doctor's appointment and you, you bastard, are coming with me! Don't call me there. I don't want to hear your damned voice!"

Sabrin stared at the note for a few minutes before throwing it in the garbage. He went to the guestroom to gather up his things to take back to the master bedroom. When he entered, he immediately noticed one of the bedside table drawers was open. It was the one he had moved the pictures of Lyssa to. He searched through the drawer in a panic. What if Niki had seen the pictures and if she had, what did she do with them? His panic began to mount when he realized the pictures were gone. Distracted and upset over the missing pictures, he grabbed the few clothes he had in the room before heading back to the master bedroom. As he passed the end of the bed, he realized he had kicked something. He looked down to see some crumpled paper on the floor - it was the pictures.

Niki had found them. Sabrin picked them up and straightened them out as best he could. He sat on the bed and stared at the image of the smiling Lyssa looking up at him and ran his fingers over her face.

"Now she knows, Lyssa. I doubt Niki would stay with me, child or not. Question is, will you?"

Sabrin wanted desperately to call Lyssa, but her time was later than his, so she would be in bed by now. He would have to wait until tomorrow evening. He did not want to upset her before she went to work, so calling her in the morning was out too. Sabrin put Lyssa's picture on his bedside table and vowed that one day, a new picture of both of them would grace this spot and it would be framed.

Sabrin finished cleaning up before getting ready for bed. He lay in bed staring at the picture of Lyssa. It was after 3:00 a.m. by the time he fell asleep. The next morning he was awakened by the phone. He reached across the nightstand to pick up the receiver. It was Paul.

"I wanted to check on how you are doing. I'm worried about you."

Sabrin gave Paul an update on Niki going to her parents’ and that he was going to call Lyssa that evening. It took Sabrin a little time to convince Paul he was okay, all things considered. The two friends hung up the phone and Sabrin once again found himself staring at the picture of Lyssa.

The day took forever to move into evening. Sabrin passed the time reading the play he had been sent and planning some redecorating. He had decided that come Hell (Niki being pregnant) or high water, he was going to get Niki out of his house at least. At this point, he doubted she would argue. About noon, he even decided it might be a good idea to get the locks changed. Niki had already done enough damage. He was not going to let her do any more to the house.

Finally, it was 4:00 and Sabrin hoped Lyssa was home and able to talk. He picked up the phone, took a deep breath and dialed.

It took four rings before Lyssa answered. Sabrin was so relieved she was home.

"Lyssa, it is so good to hear your voice."

"Sabrin, what's wrong?" He could hear the intense concern in her sweet voice. Just this made Sabrin feel better. He could not wrap himself up in her arms, so he wrapped himself in the sound of her voice.

"Niki knows about us, Lyssa. We had a fight and it came out during the course of it." He hoped she would keep talking.

Lyssa was silent for a few moments, taking in Sabrin’s words.

"Did the fight have anything to do with what was upsetting you the last time we spoke? Is it about what she wanted to talk to you about when we were in New York?" she asked.

~ Damn, she knows me so well ~ "Yes. Lyssa, I love you so much. I want you to know that my relationship with Niki is over. She's gone to her parents."

Lyssa knew something big had happened. More than just a fight. She was scared now about what he was going to tell her. Sabrin hesitated before he finally decided he would just have to say the words.

"Niki thinks she might be pregnant."

Her tone frightened him when she finally spoke. She had thrown up a wall. He could hear it clearly. "It’s your child, I assume."

"As far as I know." Sabrin closed his eyes and lowered his head. She was going to end it. He could feel it.

"Were you trying for a baby, Sabrin?"

"NO! I never wanted children! It was a mistake. An accident!" he exclaimed.

"You accidentally had sex with her and got her pregnant?” she sighed. “I'm sorry, that didn't come out the way I meant it,” she sounded very upset.

"I think it did, Lyssa. I was missing you. I was at a party and saw this woman who reminded me so much of you it hurt. I wanted you, but..." he could not finish and he was actually sure that finishing would have been a bad idea.

"She is not sure if she's pregnant?"

"The test was inconclusive. She goes back in two weeks. Do you want me to leave you alone until then, Lyssa?"

"Sabrin, I love you. But I do need to know what's going on. I'm glad you're being honest but I think I need some time to think about this. I'll call you next week."

Lyssa hung up the phone and stared at the picture of Sabrin on her mantle. She walked over to retrieve it and returned to the couch. Her mind was racing, trying to fully comprehend what he had said to her. She wondered if Sonny would be home. She needed to talk to someone who knew what was going on. She was jarred back to reality by the sound of her telephone ringing. She was not sure if she should answer it but decided to after the third ring.

"Honey, I wanted to call to see how you're doing?" It was Sonny.

"Are you psychic or something? I was just thinking about you."

Sonny did not like the way her voice sounded.

"What's wrong, Honey? Is it something to do with Sabrin?"

“Yes, everything to do with Sabrin. He just called. Niki may be pregnant,” she sputtered. The tears came now. She wished desperately Sonny were here to hold her.

“Oh, shit! Oh, Honey, I am sooooo sorry! Wait, did you say MAY be pregnant?” he asked.

“Sabrin said they won’t know for two more weeks. I just don’t know what to think about all of this.”

“I know, Honey. I wish I could be there for you. I can come this weekend if you want?”

“I want,” she told him.

"I'll be there Friday night. Will you be okay until I get there? I can take some time off work and come sooner."

"Friday's fine, Sonny. I think I need some time alone to think before I see you. Thanks for offering though. I'm so lucky to have you for a best friend."

Sonny decided to forego his usual retort. "Honey, you know I'll do anything for you."

The two friends hung up. Lyssa was still in shock over what Sabrin had told her. The tears that had started while talking to Sonny, turned into sobs. She buried her head in a cushion on the couch and cried until she fell asleep.

Lyssa decided to call in sick Thursday morning. She was in no condition to face anyone. Her eyes were red and puffy from last night.

Thursday was not good for Sabrin as well. He rose late, ate very little, stayed in and spoke to no one. The only person he wanted to speak to did not want to speak to him right now. He spent most of his time that day and the next that followed staring at his crumpled picture of Lyssa. He slept with it against his chest at night. He was sure Lyssa was going to reject him and he was not sure he would be able to take it.

Sonny arrived earlier than expected. He had tried to call Lyssa at work on Thursday and was told she was away sick and probably would not be in on Friday as well. It was shortly after 2:00 p.m. when he arrived at Lyssa's condo. As soon as he was in the door Lyssa broke down sobbing again.

"Sonny, I don't know what to do."

Sonny moved Lyssa to the couch and held her as she sobbed in his arms. He had never seen her like this before and never wanted to see her like this again.

"I'm here, Lyssa. Tell me everything now." His voice was gentle and soothing. Lyssa told Sonny everything. “You have it bad, don’t you, my Honey love?”

Sonny had waited for her to finish her story. She let the tears stream down her face as Sonny kissed her forehead. This reminded her of how Sabrin would do this after they made love and it made her cry harder.

“You have to decide what you’re going to do right now, Honey. You said he ended it with the old main squeeze, right?” Sonny asked.

“Yes, he said he ended it with her, and she was staying with her parents,” Lyssa reiterated. Sonny lifted her chin and looked her straight in the eyes.

“Do you love him?” Sonny asked in a very serious tone.

“Yes,” she sighed mournfully.

“Do you believe he loves you?”

“Yes.” She knew Sabrin did. He had sounded so hurt when he had told her about Niki.

“Then fight for him, Honey. Fight for him and stand by him. He may be as broken as you are right now. Do you think he would like to hear from you?”

Lyssa nodded her head yes.

“I told him I would call him next week-" she began.

"Don't wait Honey, don't wait. I'm going to get that smile back on your face so you don't call him sounding like you've been crying for the past two days." Sonny began to tell Lyssa about his most recent boyfriend. He had her in tears in no time, except these were tears from laughing so hard.

“That's better. Now Honey, if you don't mind, I think I'll head down to Giovanni's to get some take-out for us to have tonight. Does that sound good to you?"

"I won't wait up," she laughed.

As soon as Sonny had left, Lyssa picked up the phone. She took a deep breath and began to dial. The phone only rang twice when Sabrin answered it. Lyssa was shocked at the way he sounded.

"Sabrin, it’s Lyssa. Please just listen. I love you and I will be here for you no matter what happens. I need you in my life."

Sabrin was so relieved. He could feel tears of happiness streaming down his face.

“I want to see you. Can I come see you? I don’t care if it’s for five minutes. I need you. Can I come see you, Lyssa?” Sabrin asked. He sounded better but nowhere near normal.

“Do you think you should travel? Are you okay to drive?” Lyssa was worried about him driving since he sounded so bad.

“I can’t stay here. If you don’t come to me, I have to come to you. I’m going to call for a flight as soon as we hang up, Lyssa. Can I come to you?”

“Yes. Sonny is here too, but you won’t be staying in my spare room.”

“I love you, Lyssa. I’m on my way.”

“Let me know your flight and Sonny and I can come pick you up, if he’s back. He went out so I could call you.”

“I owe him, don’t I?”

Lyssa laughed. "Don't let him know that or he will get you to buy him a car."

The sound of Lyssa's laughter did wonders to lift Sabrin’s spirits. They hung up so he could make arrangements to fly to Chicago. He threw some clothes in a bag and called a cab. There was a flight that left in one hour and he was going to make it one way or another. He had changed the code for the alarm and locked the new locks before going outside to wait for the cab. Once it arrived, Sabrin called Paul on his cell phone to tell him the good news. Paul was tremendously relieved to hear his friend sounding so much better. He wished him a good flight and good luck.

Sabrin arrived at the airport with time to spare. He did not have to check his bag as all he brought was a carry-on and went to wait at the gate. He called Lyssa to tell her where he was and what time he would arrive.

"I'll be there to meet your plane," she assured him. She sounded like she was looking forward to seeing him and that was all he needed. When his flight was called for boarding, Sabrin took his seat, and promptly fell asleep, with his picture if Lyssa in his breast pocket, close to his heart.

His flight was not due in for two more hours, but Lyssa headed for the airport anyway. The flight was due in at 9:26 p.m., but Lyssa did not care. She drove slowly and thought carefully about what she was getting herself in for. An actor with an fourteen-year established relationship dumps pregnant girlfriend for brazen hussy who broke into his room at a sci-fi convention. The gossip rags would love this one. But if any of this got out, would Sabrin’s career be ruined? Would Niki be the one to tell the press?

Lyssa wished Sonny had come back from Giovanni's so he could be with her now. He would have distracted her from all of the thoughts going through her mind. There was still an hour to go before Sabrin’s flight would arrive and she could not stop thinking about how all of this would affect him.

~ His fans, God, how would his fans react to this? ~

She paced the airport waiting area for a while before stopping in the food court area to grab a glass of orange juice. Just when she thought she could no longer stand it, an announcement came over the PA system. Sabrin’s flight had arrived.

Lyssa all but ran to the gate. Sabrin was not the first to deplane, but he was one of the first ten. He looked exhausted but beautiful. When he saw her, he gently pushed his way past the people in front of him until he reached her. Dropping his carry on, he grabbed her, almost crushing her to him.

"God, I've missed you, Lyssa! Thanks so much for letting me come to you I-"

"Sabrin," she interrupted, a finger to his lips. "Shut up and kiss me," she ordered and begged.

He kissed her so hard, she was sure they were going to melt into one person. It felt so good to have him back in her arms. It took them several minutes to remember they were in a very public place and kissing for all they were worth.

“Do you have any other bags?" she asked, noting the rather large carry-on.

"This is it. I didn't want to be waiting at the airport any longer than necessary."

"Let's go then."

Lyssa led Sabrin to her car. It was a '95 red Saturn four door. Lyssa used a remote keypad to unlock the doors to the car and then unlocked the trunk so Sabrin could put his bag in it. As soon as they were both in the car, Sabrin leaned over to kiss Lyssa again.

"Let's go.” She pulled the car out of the airport parking lot to begin the trip back to her condo.

The drive seemed impossibly long to Sabrin. He wanted to touch her and make certain she was real. He needed much more than what he had had in the last few days - a crumpled picture.

"Damn!" he exclaimed, remembering one thing he had wanted to pack.

"What is it?" Lyssa asked, concerned.

"I meant to bring my camera. I need a new picture of you," he admitted.

"You were not supposed to have an old picture of me, you sneak. I knew as soon as I got home that time that you had taken two of my pictures."

Sabrin grinned. "And how did you know as soon as you got home, Lyssa?" he asked, knowingly.

She gave him a guilty grin. "I’m a telepath and you sent the image of the pictures to me in my mind...you know how. I looked."

Sabrin reached out and stroked her arm. "I looked every day of those long four months."

Lyssa smiled at Sabrin, "We're almost there."

It was less than five minutes later when they pulled up at Lyssa's condo. Once inside, Sabrin grabbed Lyssa around the waist before she could even turn on the lights. She turned around in his arms and they kissed passionately. Lyssa finally got the light turned on. She did not see any sign that Sonny had returned. She took Sabrin’s hand and led him to her bedroom.

"You look tired," she commented.

"Not anymore, Lyssa."

"You look like you need sleep, Sabrin." She caressed his face and with her other hand, pushing a lock of hair back. "And you need a haircut." Even as she said this, her eyes were glowing.

"All I need is you." He took her face in his hands. "I’m so sorry I did this. You have to believe this is the last thing I wanted. I don't want children, but I really don't want them with her." Sabrin hoped to see understanding in her eyes. Instead, her shoulders slumped.

"This is changing again. What are we now? This is all still so new. I've gone from weekend fling, to mistress to...I don't even know why I'm talking about this except that what you’re saying brings up something you may not want to hear.” She looked reluctant to finish. “I want to have at least one child one day."

"You do?" he questioned. "With me?"

"You are the man I'm in love with," she reminded him.

He looked at Lyssa and smiled. The idea of having a child with Lyssa did not sound bad. In fact, he thought it actually felt good to think of her carrying his child. He looked at Lyssa and kissed her gently. "I think I could get use to the idea of us having at least one."

"You're not just saying that, are you?"

"No Lyssa, this is too important. I have never had a desire to have kids but the thought of you carrying a little Berry..." He placed his hand on her stomach. "I like that."

Lyssa raised her eyebrows at him, but her jaw dropped. "Okay, I didn’t expect you to say that." She still looked thunderstruck.

Sabrin sat her down on the bed. "Hell, I'm not sure I was expecting that." He climbed on the bed as she kicked off her shoes and scooted further back. He followed her until he caught her and kissed her hard.

"I love you. I never want another woman again in my life."

They were lying in each other's arms on the bed so focused on each other they did not hear the door to the condo open. It was a little after 1:00 a.m. when Sonny had returned. He was in a pretty good mood after an interesting evening. He thought he heard something from Lyssa's room so he assumed she was still awake. He threw open the door to Lyssa's bedroom and announced, "Honey, I'm home". Sonny was shocked and more than a little embarrassed when he realized Lyssa was not alone. Lyssa burst out laughing as she and Sabrin sat up on the bed.

"Sonny, I'd like you to meet Sabrin. Sabrin, this is my best friend, Sonny." She was still laughing.

Sonny began to stammer incoherently.

"It's nice to see you again, Sonny. I owe you a lot. Thanks."

Sonny stammered out something that sounded like "You're welcome," and excused himself from Lyssa's bedroom.

"I have never seen Sonny speechless before," Lyssa told Sabrin, still laughing.

"And I think you're talking too much," he said, kissing her again.

"I'll have to stop that," she said. He nodded and kissed her again. "It’s a bad habit I have," she admitted. Sabrin sighed and reclaimed her mouth. "I really do have-"

"Okay, I give up. I'll say it. Shut up, woman, and make love to me."

Lyssa giggled. "All you had to do was ask."

Sabrin shook his head and sighed again, exasperated. He decided that maybe the direct approach would work. He got up, locked her bedroom door and began removing his clothes. Lyssa was almost drooling even before he had completely removed his shirt. His erection was apparent even before he took his jeans off, but Lyssa was sure she would climax just from the actual sight of it once he was nude. Sabrin climbed back in bed and began helping her out of her clothes. She mentally chastised herself for not having done that but the sight of him had been too enthralling. It seemed an eternity before he was finally inside her, but it was worth the wait.

Lyssa gasped once Sabrin was completely inside her. The feel of his body against hers was intoxicating. His kisses were intense and she was sure they alone could bring her to orgasm. He knew so well how to give her the most pleasure with a simple touch to her most sensitive areas. She loved being in love with a man who knew her body so well. It did not take long for her to be overcome by the rush of her orgasm.

Sabrin’s own release soon followed as he gave a guttural cry. Just this sound caused Lyssa to peak again. Once they caught their breath and were side by side, Sabrin kissed Lyssa’s forehead. He then pulled her tightly against him. “If the worst comes to pass, Lyssa, will you abandon me? I have to know.”

“If you stick by me, I’ll stick by you. I can’t promise not to get upset or angry, but I won’t go unless you throw me out.”

“That will never happen,” he assured her.

“Sabrin, there is something else that we have to consider, although I’m sure you’ve thought about this - your career. What will a scandal like this do to it? If Niki knows about us, baby or no baby she can make life hard for you.”

"I don't think there would be a scandal, Lyssa. I have never been fodder for the tabloids and I doubt they would be interested in anything I do. In the grand scheme of things, they have much bigger fish than me to fry," he reassured her. "Hey, a scandal might actual help. In show biz, they seem to boost careers rather than hinder them," he laughed.

"What about your legion of adoring fans?” she asked teasingly.

"I think the fans care more about Sirus than me," he smiled. "As long as I have you I can survive anything." He kissed Lyssa gently on the lips. "I haven't told you about the play, have I? I got the role in 'From My Balcony'. Rehearsals start at the end of the month."

"That's wonderful," Lyssa exclaimed.

"How happy are you at your job, Lyssa?" Sabrin asked her, looking very serious.

"I'm content, why?"

"I was just wondering how much I was going to be able to see you when I’m in New York. I can't stand being away from you too long, Lyssa. I just can't."

She stroked his cheek. "You'll see me. I’ll need help, but I can come for the weekends."

"What if that isn’t enough?"

"What are you suggesting?" Lyssa studied Sabrin’s face trying to get a hint as to what he was going to say next.

"Stay with me in New York and not just for the weekends."

Lyssa stared at Sabrin. She tried to say something twice but stopped herself to think about her response some more.

"Do you really think that would be wise under the current circumstances?" she asked.

"If you don't want to Lyssa, I understand," he said, although his features indicated otherwise.

"I'm not saying that, Sabrin. Don't you think we should wait until after the results next week? What if Niki tries to sue you or something?"

“She can sue me for paternity, but nothing else. We have a cohabitation agreement that spells everything out. The house will have to be sold but that’s fine with me. I live out of a suitcase most of the time anyway. If I could live out of a suitcase with you, life would be good.”

“Sabrin, I love you. I want to be with you, but I do think we need to take this a little slower just to make sure it’s going to last.”

“You have doubts?” he asked, looking hurt.

“More like fears. All I’m saying is we need to take this one day at a time. We have the time, we don’t need to rush anything.”

From the look he gave Lyssa, she could tell she needed to explain further.

"We need time to adjust. The whole time we’ve known each other we’ve been sneaking about."

Sabrin knew she was right.

"As long as you love me, I can wait. I'm looking forward to sharing my entire life with you, Lyssa. I want to take you places, have you meet my friends, everything."

"I want that too, Sabrin."

Sabrin and Lyssa fell asleep in each other’s arms after Sabrin had listed a few of the places he wanted to take her and a few of the kinds of cars he was considering for Sonny. Both had smiles on their faces as they slept.