This short story is an entry in the 2003 Soc.Sexuality.Spanking Summer Short Story Contest and is copyright by the author and commercial use is prohibited without permission. Personal/private copies are permitted only if complete including the copyright notice. The author would appreciate your comments
Category: Mini-saga
Reconciliation
By
Valerie Meilong <meilong@excite.com>
Apprehensively he pressed the doorbell. The door opened. They made eye contact.
"Hi!"
"Hi!"
There was a poignant pause. Then she flung herself into his eager arms. They kissed passionately.
"Can we really be together again, as before?"
"Yes, oh yes."
"Will you beat me like you used to? Please, darling."
The End
© Copyright Valerie Meilong 03 August 2003
Reviews
Kessily
I didn't really care for this one. The characters go from saying Hi! to speaking like something out of an old novel. It seems a bit incongruous. In addition, though it is hard to say a lot in a saga, this one just felt like a chip off of a bigger piece...not really complete of itself.
I can almost see what the author was trying to do...but not quite
Sassy Jo <sassy_jolene(at)hotmail(dot)com>
This piece is pretty good. The author conveyed a separation, and then there is promise of more to come. Overall, it runs fairly smooth. Good work author!
Warm Hand Jack
This is a complete and well-written reconciliation scene: the apprehension (beginning with
the first word), the overly-cheerful greetings, that uncertain moment...then the re-uniting, and the
final assurance that not one thing – especially the most important thing – has changed.
Ah, bliss!
My only problem was in not knowing who was speaking. If the first «"Hi!"» (or «"Can we...."») had been attributed, everything would have followed clearly; as it was, I assumed the last line was hers, and worked backwards. In fact, there's nothing to show that she is the spankee...I doubt that it was meant to be ambivalent, but maybe that's the twist.
Ladiejj <ladiejj(at)msn(dot)com>
The author shows us how much emotion can be relayed in so few words. We can see
the aspects of loss and reunion in this story. The author does a good job giving the reader
a complete story, but also leaves enough out allowing the reader to fill in the gaps with their
imagination. The story flowed well and has some nice imagery.