Men
Are Just Testicles In Prison
by Sterling
Chapter 3 of 10
"Hi,
Bill," said Amy.
"Hi,
Amy." Her visits were definitely the highlight of his day. This time
she was carrying a shallow pan full of water, a bar of soap, and a
towel. "Time to clean up."
"Oh," said Bill. He pulled the offered items into his cell and looked
at them doubtfully.
"How did you get clean at Washington Lake?"
"They let me go to a shower every few days."
"Oh, fancy place! Here you just give yourself a sponge bath. Mind if I
watch?"
"No,"
he said simply. The way she said it made him feel nice. She could of
course watch if she wanted anyway, but she was giving him a choice.
While
he stripped, she pulled up a chair and sat, her khaki-clad legs splayed
wide apart, arms folded across her chest. Bill tried to suppress his
thoughts, but he couldn't help noticing Amy's pretty face and friendly
smile. He was naked, washing himself, and she was watching. He saw her
eyes looking at his sex organs. Although her body was completely
covered, the way the cloth spread tightly over her crotch made it
apparent that she wasn't like him between the legs. He'd occasionally
seen little girls down there from a distance, but he'd never seen a
woman. Did he have a deep desire to stab his penis into Amy and cause
her agony and humiliation? He wasn't aware of such a desire at all, but
he guessed it was just his nasty male nature deceiving him. These
fleeting thoughts made his penis grow. He turned away from her and
tried to finish his washing as quickly as possible.
"Say, your
penis is getting stiff again, and you weren't touching it. Just like at
the auction when I lifted that skirt thing. What's the story with that?"
"I'm
so sorry," said Bill. "I'll do my best to keep it from happening in the
future. If you have ideas for how I can improve myself and keep it from
happening, I'll gladly try them."
"Wait," she said all of a sudden. "Is it me?"
"Oh, no, of course not! I mean... I would never do that, never think of
you in a bad way. It would be terrible of me!"
But Amy was smiling and looking at him skeptically. Bill was stepping
hastily back into the dirty sweatpants.
"No, no, take those off again," said Amy with a smile.
Miserably, Bill complied.
"Now come stand here at the bars... Face me."
His cock was growing again. There was just something about her face.
She reached her hand out slowly to grasp his penis, but he pulled back.
"Why
are you doing that?" he asked. 'Why did you do that at the auction? My
organs are disgusting, right? And my penis should never get hard except
when I'm giving a sample! I try to overcome my male nature but you make
it so difficult!"
"Oh... Oh, I'm sorry," she said, her smile gone.
He
suddenly realized that he had gone beyond his station, questioning his
handler, who undoubtedly had her reasons. And he knew that saying all
that was risky. If Shady Grove got tired of him, they could simply kill
him, as easily as Washington Lake. He gathered again his calm and
submissive voice and said, "I am sorry, ma'am. You know best. I will do
whatever you command to the best of my ability."
Amy regarded
him thoughtfully. "You really believe it all, don't you? Interesting.
You could tell Carl never really believed it."
"Believe what?"
"Everything in the Dworkinian manifesto. Especially all the stuff about
men."
Bill
was wary of a trap, but Amy's expression put him at ease. It was almost
as if she thought he was a woman -- a real person. But she also made
his loins stir, which was the start of the male response that would
soon make him intent on brutalizing her. "Um, it's what I've been
taught."
"But does it make sense to you?"
Bill sat on the
cot, dressed once again, and listened warily. "Of course, ma'am. We are
moving forward to the perfect society under Dworkinism. "
"Can I tell you a secret?"
"What do you mean?"
"Can I tell you something and you promise not to tell anyone else?"
"Yes,
I know what a secret is," he said, trying to hide his irritation. "But
why?" He was trying to think why he'd tell anyone else. She was the one
in charge of him, but her smile loosened him up. "Yes, I can," he said
definitely.
"In the attic, my mother has tons of books and
magazines from the old days that she's not really supposed to have. All
books that aren't specifically allowed are banned because they
perpetuate harmful obsolete thought patterns and interfere with finally
building the Dworkinian society."
"That sounds wise."
"Yes, well... If my mother found out I'd be in big trouble. I'm really
not supposed to look at them."
Bill nodded.
Amy
sighed and shifted in her seat. "But how can knowing something be worse
than not knowing it? Anyway, let me tell you what I've discovered about
men. It's true that men were dominant over women on the whole, but it
was way more complicated than that. Men could only have sex with women
if the women said they could." Bill raised his eyebrows. "OK, rape did
occur, and women worried about it. But at least 3/4 of women never got
raped, and the others it was usually just a time or two. It was a
crime, and if a man got caught, people -- men, often -- would send him
to prison for a long time. Men couldn't marry women unless they agreed
to it. Even when they were married the man couldn't have sex with his
wife unless she said it was OK."
Bill nodded noncommittally. This was sounding far-fetched.
"A
few men did enjoy causing women pain, but most didn't. Men loved women,
and did their best to make them happy. And here's the biggest thing.
You know how the Dworkinian position is that all sex is rape? That
women submit to men's desires?"
Bill nodded.
"Well, it's not true. Women wanted it. They craved sex a lot and missed
it."
"Pain? They wanted pain? To have their bodies punctured?"
"No!
Women have a hole, built just for sex. It's called a vagina. It's big
enough for a penis to slide in without causing any damage or pain. The
woman felt good when the penis was sliding in and out of her. She felt
pleasure -- a lot of pleasure."
Bill looked at Amy with unease.
This was contrary to everything he'd been taught. "But women are meant
to love each other as equals. The idea that a woman wants a penis was
one of the big lies of the patriarchy. Semen can be placed in a vagina
with something very small like an eyedropper, and a vagina is a birth
canal." He also realized his penis was getting hard again, so he raised
the nearer leg to block it from Amy's view.
"Yeah, well..." Amy
sighed. "That's the theory, isn't it? We women date each other, kiss,
and sleep together. We know how to give each other orgasms. It's nice."
Bill
felt jealous. He knew women felt ecstasy at the culmination of sex with
other women, and his own pleasure when he produced semen was the
primitive counterpart of the real pleasure women felt. If only he could
be a woman and feel some of those things!
"But Bill, there's
something missing! Dworkinism teaches us that our vaginas may change
and release fluid when we get excited, but this is a primitive reaction
-- paltry self-defense against the stab wounds men inflicted on us --
and inconsistent with true pleasure, which is of course from the
clitoris. That's the teaching. But I put my finger in my vagina when
I'm excited, and it feels good, damn it! Two fingers feels better than
one, and the in and out motion feels just right. I've tried it with
some of my lovers -- starting to put my finger in them. A couple told
me I shouldn't do that, but a couple let me, and they thought it felt
good, and then admitted they'd done it themselves. But they were
ashamed of it and assumed I was too."
Amy looked at him
intently. "I like it that your penis gets hard when you look at me.
It's exciting. You don't want to hurt me, you're just interested. It's
natural! Or at least I think it's me you're interested in." She lowered
her eyes.
"Um, yeah, you have that effect on me. But Amy, I
don't know," he said, very uncomfortable. "A male feeling sexual
attraction to a woman is the first step to rape," he said feebly, but
he wasn't so sure any more. "Isn't it?"
"No, not very often. So
please," she said. "Please, for me, could you stand up, come over her,
pull down your sweatpants and let me look at your nice stiff penis?"
Bill
gulped. It felt very dangerous. But his handler Amy was asking. Pretty
Amy, and he couldn't resist. He slowly rose and walked to the bars,
then pulled his sweatpants midway down his thighs. And there was his
penis, sticking straight out, right at Amy. But she didn't look
disgusted. She looked fascinated, adoring even!
"Come right up and stick it through the bars," she said.
When
he had done that she reached out her hand and touched it. A woman was
touching his penis when it was in its disgusting, violent mode! But if
what Amy said was true...
"It's so soft," she said. "But hard
too." Her light touch was terribly exciting. "I bet a vagina feels kind
of like this," she said, forming a tube with one hand and putting her
other hand at the end of the first to make a longer tube. "Now you push
in, like it was a vagina. In and out... That's it. You like that?"
Bill nodded enthusiastically.
"That's
what a man wants to do, not to make a woman feel bad but because it
feels great to him. And the woman wants him to do it because it feels
great to her."
Amy's story was amazing -- could he dare to dream
it was true? In any case, it felt fantastic pressing into the tunnel
formed by her hands. So fantastic. He stopped and pulled back. "Um, I'm
going to provide a sample if I keep doing that."
"That's OK," she said with animation. "I want you to."
"But your hands will get all gross and sticky."
"It's OK, I want it. I want to feel it. I can wash my hands, you know."
Bill
shoved his penis into the tunnel of Amy's hands and pressed. As he
pressed harder, Amy's hands adjusted to resist. Just as if he was
pressing into her body.
"That's great. I love that," she said. "Just go ahead; let it happen!"
Both
of them had been looking intently at where his penis stuck through the
bars and into Amy's hands, and then she looked up at him, and he looked
at her. There was something in her expression, something amazing and
wonderful. With a final flurry of thrusts, his penis started spasming
and spewing sperm all over Amy's hands. She raised her eyebrows in
surprise at the first surge, but then smiled and said, "Yes, that's it!
Great!" as he kept spurting, getting her hands messy and spreading it
all around with his thrusting.
He pulled back, panting, suddenly
mortified. What had he done? It was his rapist nature, losing his
judgment and penetrating Amy's hands, getting them messy. It was his
duty never to let something like that happen. He pulled his sweats up
again and sat back on the bed, burying his face in his hands.
"That was great, Bill. Just what I wanted. I'm going to try tasting
some."
Bill looked up in time to see a tongue dip into one of the whitish
clots on her right hand. She made a face. "Not too bad."
"I shouldn't have done that... I'm so sorry," he said.
"No, it was great. I'm so glad you did!" She went around the corner and
he heard the water running in the sink.
With no one watching, Bill smiled. Despite his terrific guilt, it had
been a fantastic experience.
When Amy reappeared, she said, "Would you come over here again? Take
your sweatshirt off."
Bill liked that idea.
"Stand
real close. Let me touch you." She gently placed her hands on his
beard, then moved them out to the sides to run all over his head.
"You're so... masculine!" she said, then ran her hands down his chest,
around behind his back and to his neck. It was awkward with bars
between them, but she managed.
She pressed gently on his neck,
and he let her move his face forward and down. It was going straight to
hers! Her hungry smile was almost overwhelming. Closer and closer she
pressed their faces until finally, with their cheeks against the bars,
their lips touched. He drew his breath in sharply but did not move
back. He had occasionally seen two women kiss, but of course he never
had. He'd never had any affectionate touching for as long as he could
remember. Amy was moving her lips gently back and forth, touching and
then breaking contact, then touching again. It felt great.
They both heard the soft footsteps on the stairs at the same time, and
broke apart instantly.
"So, is that clear then, Bill? You'll do what I said?" Amy ad-libbed in
a stern voice.
"Yes, ma'am. I'll do my best," said Bill. Amy headed up the stairs.
It
was just the woman with Bill's dinner tray. He withdrew to the far
corner of his cell to put his sweatshirt back on, then dove in to the
big bowl of mashed potatoes.
Bill kept going over the events of
that afternoon in his mind. He couldn't believe it -- this woman with
the beautiful face wanted to kiss him, to run her hands all over her
body. She liked his body and what his body did. She didn't mind getting
his semen on her hands. She offered this story that he wasn't evil,
that he might be OK, that in fact even before most men had been OK and
meant well. He wasn't convinced, but it was so nice to believe, and to
at least pretend it was true so he could enjoy kissing Amy. Half the
time he thought about it his penis was very stiff. A part of him was
aware that this could be very dangerous. If Amy decided Dworkinism was
all true after all and revealed what he'd done, she'd say his evil
tendencies had led her astray and he could be killed. But his desire
was stronger. He just craved Amy and thought of her every perfection.
Bill
woke in the night to the sound of someone at the outside door, followed
by hesitant footsteps on the stairs as all remained dark.
"Bill?"
a voice whispered, coming closer. Amy appeared outside his cell, dimly
visible in the little light that came through the windows at night.
"Yes,
right here," he said, joining her at the bars. He had an impulse to
reach out and pull her to him, but stopped. Was that the beginning of a
violent impulse? In any case it wasn't his place.
But Amy didn't hesitate, and reached both hands through the bars. He
took one in each of his.
"Do you mind, my coming like this? Did I wake you up?"
"No, I'm really happy to see you!"
"Phew," she said. "Do you... Do you feel like touching me?" she asked
tentatively.
"Oh God, yes!" he said. "Though only if it's what you'd like, of
course," he continued in a more moderate tone.
Amy pressed close against the bars. "Touch me, then. Touch me
everywhere!"
Amy
was dressed much as she had been before, so there wasn't much exposed
flesh, but Bill explored the uncovered and covered with equal wonder
and relish. He eagerly reached out to gently touch her cheeks,
forehead, ears, hair... Arms, back. She offered her lips and they
kissed a few times, but mostly he concentrated on the feel of Amy's
body, and her little sighs as she appreciated the touch. He saved her
chest for last, and approached tentatively. He'd been taught that men
had made sex objects out of organs made for feeding babies. "Are you
sure?" he asked.
"Oh, yes!" she said.
He caressed the mounds of her breasts, wondrous and perfect.
Suddenly
she stepped back and lifted her shirt up to armpit level, and there
were her breasts, the first he's seen in his life. She pressed forward
against the bars, one breast protruding into his cell until her chest
was firmly against the bars. "Shit, I've got to remember to turn the
heat up in here! But can you use your mouth? Lick, suck? Please!"
Bill bent over to reach Amy's breast. He licked very gently.
"Harder!" she said.
"OK, but I've never even seen a breast before."
"Oh, right... put the nipple in your mouth and suck hard."
It
felt great. Amy moaned, and he was aware of just how hard his erection
was down below. She pulled back to stick the other breast through. Bill
got down on his knees and sucked on it eagerly. He tentatively brought
his hands around and fondled Amy's butt through her pants, always alert
for some indication he should stop. But there was none.
In a
moment he would never forget, she grabbed his right hand and put it on
her inner right thigh just above the knee, and then quickly and almost
violently brought it upward until it hit her right in the crotch, and
then she molded it to lay flat against her female parts. She
demonstrated a rhythmic motion, and when she removed her hand he kept
it up. As her moans increased her nipple fell from his mouth.
Amy
pulled her shirt back down and then lowered her pants and underpants to
just above her knees. "Touch it again, just flesh on flesh."
With
no cloth in the way, his hand was met with more complex textures: warm
smooth thighs to the side, then hair, and at the mid-line hints of
moist flesh through the hair. He also looked at her face, just a few
inches away through the bars. By the dim light from the windows he
could see her smooth features; her eyes were closed and her face slack.
"Inside!" she whispered.
He gradually pressed inward at the centerline, but there was
resistance. He didn't dare press too hard.
"I
bet you've never done this before, huh?" she whispered with a smile.
She reached between her legs to do something and then guided his hand
in once more. This time his middle finger met a crack with smooth, wet
flesh, right at her mid-line, right between her legs. He wondered at
this unfamiliar anatomy, so very alluring.
"Inside!" she whispered again.
The
whole slit was smooth and wet, and gentle pressure quickly revealed
where her vagina must be. And his finger soon slid within -- and
further within, and yet further. He wasn't so sure about the diameter
problem, but it sure seemed deep enough to take a penis without it
being a stabbing.
"Oooo," said Amy. "That's so right... But I want the real thing!"
Bill's heart pounded. She wanted it? Like having him do violence to
her? To get raped? Right now?
"Let me see you and feel you!" she said.
He hastily removed his sweatshirt and sweatpants.
She reached through the bars to quickly brush her hand down his chest.
"Your cock sure looks ready! Are you ready?"
"Yeah, um, I guess, if you're sure."
"Oh,
I'm sure all right. I might get pregnant. Hmmm. That wouldn't be so
terrible; it's about time. And you'd be the father, one way or the
other! Now, how do we do this?" She pressed her pelvis against the
bars. Bill tried squatting down to get his penis at the right level.
She helped with that by getting on her tippy toes. He pressed his penis
through the bars into the space between her legs. Bill guided his penis
between her lips. He was especially excited to feel the hot wetness
against the top of his penis tip. He started moving back and forth,
probing gently. She tried tilting her pelvis, leaning her torso back
and holding herself up by gripping the bars. Still his probings didn't
go anywhere.
"No, it's not going to work," she said. "There's
one other way." And to his great surprise, she got down on hands and
knees and turned to point her rear end towards him and then press it
back against the bars. She wiggled her feet under the bars at the
bottom.
"Really?" he said.
"Why not?" she said. "Just be sure you get the right hole!" She laughed.
Down
on his own hands and knees, Bill got oriented to her anatomy with one
hand and aimed his penis with the other. He pressed, and her girl parts
pressed inward, promising an opening, but not one he could find right
away.
After he'd fumbled around for the better part of a minute,
Amy said, "Just press harder." He did, but not much happened. "Even
harder."
"Really?"
"Yeah, go for it."
Bill pressed
harder, and harder still at her moist hairy spot, probing insistently.
There was no bone in the way, only soft flesh. Slowly he felt the
tissues opening. The hair he was pressing against became wetter hair,
and then the hair parted and he was in nothing but hot wetness.
Amy sucked in her breath.
"Should I stop?" he asked anxiously.
"No! Go for it! Shove it in!"
He
didn't need much encouragement. He reached through the bars, grabbed
her hips, and shoved his pelvis back and forth, working his penis in a
little more each time. He could get no farther when his pubic bone hit
the bars, while the same bars blocked him from pulling Amy's butt any
more tightly towards him. But it was enough. He began moving in and
out, Amy gasping and moaning.
Suddenly memories of stroking his
penis with his hand seemed obsolete. This was the way it was supposed
to be -- his penis buried in a woman's body -- a very particular part
of her body, right up between her legs. His excitement built rapidly.
"Can I, um, provide a sample?" he asked breathlessly.
"Oh, God yes!" said Amy.
He
picked up his pace, thrusting in and out of the hot tunnel, gripping
this woman's hips. The pleasure built and then crashed, his cock
twitching as he pumped in and out frantically. Before too many seconds,
he was satisfied and realized how uncomfortable his position was. He
gradually let go and his deflating penis slid out. He sat on the floor.
Amy
turned around and after a moment's thought she sat and leaned her right
side against the bars, and he leaned his left against her right. So
they sat, side by side, shoulders touching. Her arm stuck through the
bars and circled his waist. His hand reached through and rested on her
right thigh.
"Was... Was that what you wanted? What you expected?"
"Definitely
what I wanted. God, those Dworks sold us a bill of goods on sex! As for
what I expected, not quite. It's bigger around than I thought. It hurt
a bit -- but it's definitely what I wanted. And now your sperm is
swimming around up there. And it might start a baby not because we
decided to start a baby, but because I wanted to get fucked, and you
wanted to fuck me, and we did, and sometimes that's what happens after
a good fucking!"
Her talk brought back Bill's old fears. "But...
this 'fucking', was it violent? I didn't feel like I wanted to hurt
you, and I did, at least a little."
"Oh, forget all that stuff, Bill. I wanted it so bad, and the hurt was
just a little detail."
Suddenly Bill had an idea. "I just realized... You do have a key to my
cell, right?"
Amy
laughed too. "Yeah, I guess I do." But she made no move to get up. He
imagined her letting herself in so they could hug properly, lying down
on his cot. He didn't say anything. He wasn't entirely sure how he felt
about it, either. It was one thing to have sex, but if the door was
open, would he suddenly be seized by an irresistible urge to flee, to
rape and dominate other women?
After a while, Amy looked at her
left wrist intently and said, "Oh, gosh, it's 2:30. I've got to be
getting to sleep." They both rose. She put her face to the bars, he
followed her lead, and they shared a brief kiss.
Soon she was up and fully dressed. "Good night!"
"Good night," he said. He had many questions, and more kept coming as
he lay in bed reliving the experience.