Chapter 3

The play was to begin in five minutes and most of the seating was gone, but Raygan had yet to arrive. Data could find no logical reason for his constant looking out from backstage to see if she was there yet, but he found himself looking anyway.

"Is there something wrong with the curtain, Data?" asked Will, coming to stand next to the android.

"No, Commander. The curtain is in perfect condition," Data answered factually.

"You don't seem to be. If I didn't know you better, Data, I'd say you were nervous." Data looked almost insulted.

"But you do know better. I cannot be nervous."

“But something is bothering you. You can't forget your lines. You only have five and you can't forget anything, so it can't be that. What is it, my friend? Is it fair or foul that troubles your mind?" Will asked, grinning one of his famous grins.

"Commander Silver had indicated to me she would be attending the performance this evening but she has yet to arrive. As the curtain will be raised in less than four minutes-" Data's words were cut off by Will.

"No need to be concerned, my friend. I see the fair maiden yonder," Will joked. Data turned quickly to see Raygan enter the room. She looked over towards the stage and, seeing Data, gave him a quick wave. He waved back. Will looked at his friend and began to wonder exactly what type of relationship Data had with the new head of Stellar Sciences.

Raygan had been able to find two seats together and waited for the start of the play. With Data's part quickly concluded, he came over to join her in the audience for the rest of the performance.

Once he was seated, Raygan leaned over to whisper, "You were terrific, Data." She gave his hand a squeeze as she spoke.

Data was pleased with her compliment, but he was again distracted. Raygan still had a hold of his hand and Data found he was not looking forward to the moment when she let go. Looking down at their hands, Data analyzed his thought processes that had involved Raygan lately. He had found himself eager to discuss Sherlock Holmes, but he had not wished to discuss it with Geordi as he had in the past, Data had wanted to discuss it with Raygan. Why? Data could have asked anyone to save him a seat. Even the captain would have been happy to do so. But Data had not wanted to ask the captain. He had wanted to ask Raygan. Again, why?

Data was reminded of the moment when his daughter, Lal had learned about expressions of affection and had taken hold of Data's hand from the back, as Raygan was doing now. For reasons that were similar, but not the same, Data again turned his hand over and took hold of Raygan's hand. Raygan turned back to face him again, giving him a soft smile. Data looked back at the play when he noticed she was again watching.

Deanna Troi had been enjoying the play when she noticed Data had come to sit next to Raygan. She watched as Raygan had placed her hand on Data's and whispered to him and she saw Data's reaction to this action. She had difficulties sensing what Raygan was feeling but she knew she was feeling something. You did not need to be an empath to read the look in Raygan's eyes when she looked at Data.

After the performance, the audience slowly started to leave. A few people had stayed behind to congratulate their friends on a job well done. Deanna saw Geordi speaking with Will so she joined them. She congratulated Will on his performance before changing the subject to their mutual friend.

"Geordi, what do you know about Data's relationship with Commander Silver?" She had a hint of concern in her voice.

"I have been meaning to speak to you about that, Counselor," responded Geordi.

"I was wondering about that myself, Geordi," Will confided. "You should have seen him before the play. He seemed truly agitated that Commander Silver had stood him up. He was watching for her." The other two took this in.

Geordi volunteered: "I spoke with her the other day while Data was giving her a tour of the Enterprise. I told her Data could not return her feelings but she insisted the only thing she felt was friendship. I don't buy it though," Geordi said with a grimace.

"I tend to agree with you," Deanna agreed. She touched her chin, deep in thought. "I had trouble sensing her, but her expression was not difficult to read at all. Surprisingly, neither was Data's."

"Data's?" both men chorused.

"He even took hold of her hand. I saw it," Deanna asserted. "Geordi, do you know how much time they are spending together or what type of activities they do together?" Deanna was trying to pump Geordi for information.

"I would say they spend quite a bit of time together. They don't see each other everyday. I can see a difference in Data's behavior if he hasn't seen her the day before. He gets quiet. You have to almost force him to talk to you unless you bring up one subject and then you can't get him to stop."

"You mean Commander Silver?" Deanna asked.

"Exactly. I know Data has lent her a book of Holmes' stories that they discuss and they spend quite a bit of time talking. If you are asking if they have become intimately involved, Data hasn't said anything but I don't believe they are." 

"I'll give him this, Data has good taste in women," Will said with an evil grin. Deanna rolled her eyes at him.

"You're not helping," she said, drolly.

"Helping what? You two talk like this is a threatening super nova. Data is a big boy now. He's not a wet behind the...okay, so he's not that experienced, but he's not as innocent and helpless as you two seem to think. She likes him, he likes her. What's the problem?"

"Data has no emotions," Deanna reminded him.

"And Raygan does," Geordi added. 

"Whatever type of relationship they have, she did go into it with her eyes wide open but if you're so worried about this then why not talk to Data about it. Deanna, you and he have talked about relationships before, haven't you?"

"Yes, we have. I think I'll ask Data to come and see me tomorrow."

Data and Raygan were oblivious to the discussion of their relationship. They had left as soon as the play had concluded, going to the arboretum to talk about the performance. 

"How long have you been acting, Data?" Raygan asked him as they entered an already occupied, but quiet area of the arboretum.

“I have been performing in plays with various members of the crew for nearly two years. I have also spent many hours in the holodeck under the guidance of Captain Picard attempting to better understand and emulate human emotions.” As Data spoke, the pair strolled through an area that was moderately forested with numerous varieties of trees.

“You wish to emulate them even if you don’t feel them?” Raygan questioned.

“I have noted that if my reactions vary dramatically from my fellows, it sets me apart in a way that makes me seem to be cold and unapproachable. I do not wish to be set apart.”

Raygan stopped walking in order to give Data her full attention.

“I can understand that, Data. We all want to be accepted for who and what we are.”

"You have had difficulties being accepted in the past?" Data asked.

"Yes, I have. You sound like you don't believe me."

"As you have said you would never lie to me, I do not believe your statement to be untrue however when I witness your interaction with your crewmates it seems surprising that you have had difficulties in that area."

"When I was growing up I didn't fit in very well. My schoolmates were all humans. I think many of my Rekellian traits made them uncomfortable but I’ve always been very proud of both my Terran and Rekellian heritages. It was very difficult trying to find acceptance when those around me constantly told me I was different. At the Academy, there were so many different species that I didn’t stand out as much but it wasn’t until I was assigned to the Goddard that things started to change. As good as it was on the Goddard, it’s been even better here." 

“Things changed for me once I was posted aboard the Enterprise. While I was pleased to be allowed into the Academy, I was not accepted by most of my classmates. I believe it could be said that I was seen as a walking computer and no more. Perhaps not a totally inaccurate view, however-”

“Data, that is not true. You are a person. The fact you came into being in a different way than just about everyone else is irrelevant. It makes a difference how you will be treated if injured. It should not make a difference on how you are treated otherwise.”

“Thank you, Raygan.” Data tried a smile here.

Raygan grinned back. “For what? Stating the obvious? How could anyone spend more than ten minutes in the same room with you and not like you?”

Data had spent enough time among humans to know that was a rhetorical question.

"I believe the same can be said about you."

"So here we are, Data. Two people who desperately wanted to fit in who have found a home on the Enterprise."

"That seems to be a correct assessment of the situation," Data responded.

They sat down on the grass around a small pond in the center of the arboretum. Raygan leaned back on her arms a little and turned to Data.

"Tell me about the plays you've been in, please, Data."

Data told her of the plays and when asked, went on to talk about the different works he had studied in order to better understand humanity. Raygan mentioned being hungry, so they headed to Data's quarters so she could eat and Data could feed Spot.

When Data and Raygan arrived, there was a message waiting on his terminal. Data excused himself as Raygan agreed to get something to eat. He had the computer open the message, noting it was from Counselor Troi. The message indicated she wished for Data to see her after his duty shift the next day. It did not, however, include a reason why. 

As Raygan was standing at the replicator, Spot was busy circling her legs waiting for her dinner.

"Data, would you like me to replicate something for Spot?" she called to him.

"Thank you, Raygan. I would suggest feline supplement #64."

Raygan ordered Spot's dinner and placed it on the floor for the hungry cat. Raygan replicated at plate of Berami and a glass of water. She asked Data if he wanted anything but he declined. She sat down on his couch, placing her plate on the table in front. When Data joined her, he was curious as to what she had ordered.

"This is a Rekellian snack food called Berami. Help yourself if you would like to try some," she offered, picking up a piece. 

Data picked one up from the plate to study the odd blue color. Looking back at Raygan, he could see her eat another while giving him an encouraging smile. Data carefully placed the morsel in his mouth and tasted. He was able to quickly analyze the ingredients that went into making this dish, but he, of course, could not enjoy the flavor.

“It is an interesting combination of ingredients,” he told her, looking apologetic.

“You don’t get a heck of a lot out of eating, do you, Data?”

“This area seems to be one of the few that others have the most difficulty accepting,” Data noted. Raygan sat back as though she had been insulted.

“I can accept it, Data. I just think it’s sad. Food can mean so many different things to different people, but to you it means nothing at all, but a separation. Another way you’re different. It’s too bad, because food can be so... oh, never mind.” Raygan looked away, embarrassed.

“Why? What were you going to say, Raygan? Please tell me.“ Data looked so earnest in his request.

Raygan found herself answering almost against her will. “Well, food can be many things including sensual.”

 "Sensual? How so?" Data asked.

"In so many ways, Data. The food itself can be sensual."

"As in an aphrodisiac?"

"Yes, and in other ways too. Visually, for example. Also, it can be what you do with the food. It's difficult to explain but the act of feeding your partner can be very sensuous or using certain foods while having sex." Raygan was getting a little embarrassed talking about this.

Data accessed his databanks for references to food and sexual intimacy.

"Ah, I see," he said once he had completed his accessing. “For example,” he said as he lifted up another piece of the Berami. He leaned closer to Raygan, offering her the piece. Raygan was not sure what else to do, so she took a bite. Leaning even closer, Data brushed a strand of hair from her face with a finger. His finger brushed her cheek, causing a shiver to run through Raygan’s body. He looked into her eyes, the corners of his mouth swept upwards just slightly.

“Is that close enough?” Data asked, his voice almost lyrical.

“Close? You were thinking of closer?” she asked.

“I do try to perform my approximations as closely as possible. Did I fail in my attempt?” he asked, innocently.

"You did well, Data.”  ~ Too well. ~ “Do you see how sexy food can be?" she asked.

"I understand the concept of food as a stimuli however I do not know if I will ever truly understand unless I am able to experience the emotion brought about by the stimuli."

"I hope you do, Data. I better get back to my quarters. It's getting late."

Data stood up and accompanied Raygan to the door.

"Thank you for coming to the play tonight, Raygan, and for spending your evening with me."

"I had a wonderful time, Data. I hope we can spend some more time together soon." She squeezed his arm and then left for her quarters. 

Data watched her go. Slowly walking into his quarters, he replayed every moment of the evening in his mind. He was walking, but not really paying attention to where he was going, except that he was avoiding walking into a wall. When he reached the wall, Data put his reverie aside to take note of the place where he had ended up. Before him, in a dark glass and mirrored case, a little piece of technology floated in a protective field. Data stared at the spinning item and, not for the first time, considered. 

The emotion chip Data's father had created held a new allure for Data. When he had considered installing the chip previously, he had weighed the pros and cons based on his desire to fit in better with his crewmates. This time it was different, there seemed to be more at stake. Data stared at the chip, wondering whether he would be able to experience the things Raygan had described that evening. He also wondered if he would be capable of having the type of relationship where he could experience the sensuality and love of a partner...of Raygan?

Data’s thoughts regarding Raygan were confusing. He had friendships with a number of people but his friendship with her was different. He thought about Counselor Troi wanting to see him the next day and decided it would be a good idea to speak to her regarding his confusion.

Raygan made it the short distance to her quarters without collapsing and that was a miracle. She entered, going straight to the water basin to throw water on her face. “What’s the old remedy for completely inappropriate feelings like this? Cold shower?” Raygan stared at her face in the mirror. She was very angry with the person who owned that face. That person could have ruined a perfectly wonderful friendship this evening. “Food can be sensual, Data. Feeding your partner can be sexy. Using food during sex. Why didn’t you just...kiss him,” Raygan groaned and rolled her eyes. “That would have been just about the worst thing possible. Kissing your superior officer. Great career move. He’d have me on report or something.”

Raygan changed out of her uniform and into her nightgown before collapsing on the bed. She was still angry with herself but now she was confused as to why she was angry. Was it because she had wanted to kiss Data or because she did not act on that desire?

 ~ Just friendship. I only want friendship. ~ She hoped if she kept repeating this to herself she would believe it, but she did not. She eventually drifted off to sleep but she could not escape these feelings, even in her dreams.

Meanwhile, Data had decided the only way he would be able to stop replaying the events of his friendship with Raygan would be to deactivate his cognitive functions and activate his dream program.

Data was walking down a long corridor. He walked to the end and, seeing a door there, went through. In the room, there was a man. The man had dark hair and was the same height and build as Data. He smiled when Data came in, but Data just blankly returned his stare.

A door to the right opened and Raygan walked in. Her hairstyle was different and Data decided the change was aesthetically pleasing, but Data did not have the chance to tell her. The other man took hold of her hand, smiled warmly at her and when Raygan responded to him, he told her she looked beautiful this evening. Data opened his mouth to speak to Raygan but, in that instant, the pair vanished.

Confused, Data went towards the door Raygan had entered only to find himself back in a room with the same man. This time the man grinned, giving a pleasant, but not mocking laugh.

Raygan again entered. Data moved quickly to her, but this man was equally agile. He gently took Raygan's arm and leaned to whisper in her ear. Whatever he had said made Raygan smile and laugh as well. Data again watched her disappear. This scene played out many times and each time Data could not seem to gain Raygan's attention. The final time this played out before he awoke, the room only had Raygan, but the room was much longer and he could not seem to get closer no matter how fast he ran. Data called to her, but Raygan could not hear him, no matter how loud he called.

Raygan tossed and turned in her bed as she dreamed. She was walking along a long corridor. She looked behind her and could see Ten Forward but she was not on deck ten. She kept moving down the corridor when Geordi La Forge called to her.

"Raygan, where's Data? Why isn't Data with you?" He began to laugh.

She continued walking when she saw Matt. "Raygan, you're all alone. Why isn't Data with you?" He, too, began to laugh.

Raygan began to walk quickly down the corridor, passing person after person. All of them were laughing at her and calling out, "You can never have him, Raygan."

"You're nothing but a programmed response, Raygan."

"He doesn't care, Raygan."

She now began to run and found herself outside her quarters. Spot was standing at her door. She bent down to pick her up when Spot started to laugh at Raygan too. "Programmed response - nothing but a programmed response."

Raygan had not been able to sleep after her dream of Spot and the crew taunting her. She was trying like hell to get it out of her mind and concentrate on her work, but her eyes hurt and the words on the monitor kept blurring. She sighed, closed her eyes and rested her head in her hands for a moment.

"You okay, Raygan?"

Raygan looked up suddenly to see Matt in her doorway, looking worried.

“I didn’t sleep well last night. Bad dream,” she said with an embarrassed smile.

“Then take off. It’s one of the perks of being the boss. Go to sickbay, get something to help you sleep,” Matt encouraged her.

Raygan found herself walking down the corridor moments later. But sickbay did not sound like the right answer.

Raygan’s wanderings lead her to deck eight. She was standing in front of the office door of Deanna Troi, ship's counselor but she was hesitant to go in. She stood there for a few minutes before she finally reached out and rang the door chime. There was no answer. She waited a moment and rang again. Still no answer. Raygan could not help but smile at the irony of this situation. She had never gone to talk to a counselor before and now, when she finally goes to see one, the counselor is not there. Raygan went to deck ten instead of going back to Stellar Sciences. She went into Ten Forward, as she knew it would be virtually empty at this time of day. She ordered a drink before moving to the giant window at the back of the room. She was staring out into space when she heard a voice beside her.

"You look like you're a million miles away." Raygan turned to see a woman standing next to her. "I'm Guinan. I manage Ten Forward."

Raygan introduced herself. She recalled Data mentioning Guinan a few times. He had said she was a very wise woman with extraordinary listening skills.

"You're Data's friend, aren't you?"

"Data and I are good friends," she nodded.

"You look like you could use another friend right now. I am available should you wish to talk about whatever’s bothering you. I am a very good listener."

Raygan nodded and thanked Guinan. They made their way to a table and sat down.

Raygan sighed as she looked at the casing of the window. “You referred to me as Data’s friend. May I ask why?” she asked, slowly lifting her eyes to meet Guinan’s.

“I listen. I’ve also seen the two of you together here a time of two. Am I incorrect in calling you his friend?” Guinan asked, her face still the picture of serenity.

“No, but I wonder about the things you’ve been hearing. Have people been... Have they...” Raygan stopped to sigh heavily.

“I have heard you are Data’s new friend,” Guinan told her.

“That’s all? I mean, they didn’t say that I was foolish or anything?”

“Have you done something foolish?” Guinan asked.

Raygan looked startled for a moment and then looked sadly back at the window casing. “Yes, I think I just may have.”

”I am a very good listener" Guinan reminded Raygan.

"I'm losing control of my emotions, Guinan. I have thoughts going through my mind that I shouldn't and I can't stop them. I had this dream last night..." she shook her head.

"This is about Data, isn't it?"

"Yes," Raygan admitted in a whisper. "I feel things for Data that I shouldn't. Commander La Forge has already made sure to point out that Data's responses are based on familiarity and are programmed to my actions. That's what my dream was about. Everyone was laughing at me and yelling at me that he doesn't care and that his responses are part of his programming. I don't want to jeopardize my friendship with Data because I can't keep my feelings under control."

"And why must you keep your feelings under control?" Guinan asked.

Raygan looked aghast. “Because he can’t really feel anything for me. It’s all just programmed responses, isn’t it?”

Guinan smiled, gently. “Has Data ever asked you to do something with him?”

“Yes,” Raygan answered.

“Well, I’m his friend, but he has rarely invited me to do anything with him and I’ve known him for years.”

Raygan looked down again, even more confused. “I just don’t know if I’m hoping for more than he has to give.”

“Maybe you should ask?”

"Ask? What do I say to him? I can't just go up to him and say 'Data, I'd like us to be more than friends. What do you think,' can I?" She was still feeling confused as she looked at Guinan.

"Why not? Have you ever thought he might want the same thing?"

"Do you think that's possible?" Raygan was a little stunned by her comment.

"I've seen the way Data interacts with you. It's different from how he interacts with his other friends. I think others have noticed that too. Why else would Geordi have spoken to you?" Guinan paused momentarily before continuing. “No one would want this to go badly for either of you, but if you listen to Data and he listens to you, it may surprise you what he is capable of."

Raygan looked up and finally smiled at Guinan. "You're right. Just like any other relationship. Just talk to him." Raygan laughed softly at her own foolishness for missing the obvious. Data had never been closed minded or even standoffish. Why would that change? If he did not want this, he would simply say so. It may hurt, but it would still be Data, honest.

Raygan thanked Guinan and even felt compelled to give her a hug before leaving. Guinan smiled as she watched her go, silently wishing Raygan peace of mind.

As Raygan made her way back to Stellar Science, Data had been called to Engineering by Geordi. They were again having problems with the console the two had upgraded the other day. As Data and Geordi worked on fixing the problem, Data turned to face his friend, telling him of the message he had received from Counselor Troi the previous evening.

"I do not know why she wishes to see me however the timing of her request is most fortuitous," Data informed Geordi.

"Why's that, Data?" Geordi inquired.

"I had wished to speak with her as I need some advice regarding relationships."

“Oh? Are you having trouble with a relationship, Data?” Geordi asked, trying not to sound too obvious.

“I do not believe trouble would be the correct word. Uncertainties would probably be a more accurate description,” Data decided.

“Anything you want to talk about?” Geordi offered. He hated seeing Data in turmoil.

Data again looked uncertain, and hesitant. “It concerns Raygan.”

“Oh? What about her, Data?”

“I am not sure. That is the problem. I find myself dwelling on thoughts of my time with her. If I think of something I wish to do in my off duty time, I invariably think of sharing it with her. I hope you are not offended by that, Geordi,” Data added, looking concerned over hurting Geordi’s feelings.

"I'm not offended, Data," Geordi assured him. "Go on."

"Take the play, for example. I could have requested that you or Captain Picard or anyone save a seat for me, however I only wished to ask Raygan and when it was almost time for the curtain to rise and she had yet to arrive I was distracted from the play. And last night..."

"What happened last night, Data?" Geordi was a becoming worried.

"I activated my dream program and had a very unsettling dream."

"Would you like to tell me about it?"

"Not at this time, Geordi. I am still trying to analyze its meaning. I am hoping Counselor Troi will be of some assistance as well."

They finished repairing the console just before their duty shift was to end. Data left Engineering, making his way to deck eight to see the counselor.

“Come in, Data,” the counselor said as her door slid aside to reveal him.

“Good evening, Counselor. I hope you are well. You wished to see me?” Data asked, taking a seat when she pointed to one.

“Yes, I was wanting to see how you are. I understand you have a new friend. Someone you are spending a great deal of time with?”

Data was taken aback. He had not expected that Deanna had wanted to speak to him about Raygan, but she was obviously who the counselor was referring to.

“Raygan Silver. Yes, Counselor. I had actually wished to speak to you about her. But, did you have something you wished to say?”

Deanna smiled. “Not right now. You go ahead, Data. What did you want to say?”

“I have noticed that since Raygan came aboard, I have enjoyed the time I have spent with her and wished to spend more time with her. I find I have begun to prefer her company to that of my other friends. I am not sure I understand why. And there was also my dream.”

"You had a dream about Raygan?" Deanna asked.

"Yes, Counselor. It was most unsettling." Data proceeded to tell Deanna the details of his dream. The counselor listened intently but was not quite sure what to make of what Data was telling her. If he was human and had emotions, she would be certain he was in the beginning stages of falling in love but he did not have emotions and he was an android.

“What part of this dream did you find most unsettling, Data?” she asked, probing for answers.

“That Raygan did not seem to notice me. It seemed as though the other man was able to interact with her faster and more efficiently. My attempts to gain her attention were inadequate.” Data sounded dejected as he said this. He was getting better at emulating this emotion.

“Why do you think your attempts were inadequate? This dream seems to be important for you, Data. What do you think it was trying to tell you?”

Data grimaced and looked up at the counselor. “I believe the dream was telling me I am not capable of what I wish.”

“And what do you wish, Data,” Deanna asked, becoming alarmed.

“To pursue a relationship of a romantic nature with Raygan."

Deanna sat back in her seat, studying Data's demeanor. She knew Data and Raygan were close but she had not expected this.

"Do you believe you are incapable of pursuing a romantic relationship with Raygan, or any woman for that matter, Data?"

"As you are aware, Counselor, I have made only one attempt at a romantic relationship."

"With Jenna D’Sora," Troi nodded.

"Yes, and I was incapable of meeting her emotional needs. I do not believe I could meet Raygan's emotional needs...or my own."

"Your emotional needs?" Troi was confused.

"Yes, Counselor. The most important thing for me would be to meet the needs of Raygan however I would like to know what it feels like to be loved and in love," Data explained.

"Data," Troi gasped, "are you considering installing your emotion chip?"

"I have been considering it, yes," Data admitted. "I found myself very seriously considering it just last evening after Raygan left my quarters."

"Did something significant happen last evening?” Deanna asked. She was hoping more information would give her a clearer view of Raygan Silver’s feelings for Data.

“Many things occurred last evening, however, I believe the most significant would be our discussion of the sensuality of food.”

Troi did her best not to gulp in air audibly. She was fairly certain her surprise was registering on her face, though.

“Did talking about this trouble you, Data?”

“No, however my reactions did. She spoke of how feeding one’s partner could be a sensual act. I wished to experience this. I offered Raygan some of the food she had been eating and she took it from my fingers. I could see my actions were having an affect on her, Counselor. I too was affected.”

Deanna leaned forward. “How did it affect you, Data?”

“It left me...wanting.”

"Wanting? Wanting what, Data?"

"To feel, to love."

Deanna was dumbstruck. She had never seen Data like this.

"I can understand your wanting to experience these things. Do you know how Raygan feels? Have you spoken to her about this?"

"No, Counselor, I have not. I do not know how to proceed."

“I think you will do fine if you’re honest. It is one of your strengths. She has seemed eager to spend time with you, correct?” Deanna asked.

“She has yet to decline an invitation from me.”

“Does she seem reluctant to leave you, Data?”

Data’s eyes moved in the way that told the counselor he was accessing those memories. “She does not seem eager to part from me. Yes, she does seem reluctant to leave at times.”

Deanna smiled. She got up from her seat and came over to sit next to Data. Taking his arm, she gave it a squeeze. “Talk to her, Data.”

"Thank you for your advice, Counselor. I will speak to Raygan." Data got to his feet and was gone. Deanna could not help but smile as Data left. She hoped Data would find what he was looking for.

Data returned to his quarters to feed Spot. He asked the computer to locate Raygan. Since she was in Stellar Sciences, Data decided to go there to see if Raygan would join him for dinner. 

Before he was able to leave, Spot finished her food and decided it was time for the ‘wild cat act’. She raced through their quarters and knocked over several items, including breakables. Data was forced to amend his plans to first include cleaning up the mess his roommate had caused. Data was just finishing cleaning up the remains of the final victim when his door chime sounded.

“Enter, please,” Data called from his position behind the couch where he was kneeling to clean glass shards. The door to his quarters slid open and Raygan hurried in.

“Data,” she called, looking around. Data stood up, the task he was performing no longer important.

“Raygan, I am here.” He moved to her, laying down his portable cleaning unit. Raygan came across the room to him. When they were only two feet apart, she looked away and blushed. She took a deep breath before looking back at Data.

“I need to talk with you. Can I talk with you? Are you busy?” she asked, sounding nervous.

“I was going to- No, I am not busy. Would you like to sit down?” he asked, leading her towards the other side of the couch. Data wondered what she had to say. Did she know he was interested in broadening their relationship?

They had just sat down when there was the sound of glass breaking coming from another area of Data's quarters.

"I do not know what has gotten into Spot this evening. She has been quite destructive in her behavior."

"Let me help you clean it up, Data," Raygan offered.

Upon investigation, Data saw that Spot had knocked over a glass sculpture he had received as a gift from Jenna D'Sora years earlier. Data and Raygan silently began to pick up the pieces of glass.

"Damn!" Raygan exclaimed as she looked at her hand. There was a small amount of blood on her palm from where she had cut it on the glass.

"You are injured. Do you need to go to sickbay?"

"It's just a small cut, Data. I'll be okay." Raygan wanted to kick herself. She had so much on her mind that she had not been paying attention. Data finished cleaning up the glass before leading Raygan back to the couch. He got a small first aid kit from a drawer to clean the cut. Raygan could not help but sigh at the gentleness of his touch. The cut was not bleeding anymore so Data decided not to insist she see Dr. Crusher. Raygan smiled at Data while he still held her hand. Data had seen Raygan smile many times but this time it seemed different.

"What is it, Raygan?" Data asked.

"I was just thinking back to when I was a kid and I would cut myself. My mother would clean the cut, like you were just doing, and then she would always kiss it to make it better."

Data had still been holding Raygan's hand. He looked at her, then raised her palm and kissed the area where the cut was.

Raygan decided telling him this may have been a very bad idea. When Data lifted his head and looked back at her, she had the most overwhelming desire to grab his face and kiss him so hard it would knock his boots off. But that would not be appropriate. But he was so damned cute. So damned sweet and, android or not, she had to admit she wanted him. Now all she had to do was admit it.

“Perhaps you should be taken to sickbay, Raygan. You have lost most of the color in your cheeks. Are you ill?” Data asked. Helping her to a stand, he touched his hand to her forehead, checking for elevated temperature. ~ Don’t check my pulse, Data! ~ she mentally warned him, knowing it was racing like her heart.

“Data, I really need to talk to you. Can we sit, please?” she asked, trying to keep her voice steady.

“If you wish. I had actually wished to speak with you as well, Raygan.” Data followed her back to the couch and this time Spot did not interrupt.

But now Data’s comment was getting in the way. “You wanted to speak to me? What about, Data?”

"Our friendship," Data replied. Raygan was sure any color left in her face had drained. Her self-doubt consumed her. ~ What if he wants to end this, ~ her mind screamed. She tried to sound calm as she spoke. She had a nervous smile on her face.

"What about our friendship, Data?"

"I wish to discuss with you the possibility of expanding the parameters of our friendship," Data explained.

"Expand the parameters?" Raygan repeated.

"In human terms, I wish to date you, Raygan."

"Yes!" Raygan almost shouted. “I would like that.” She knew she had a silly grin on her face, but she could not convince her facial muscles to relax. Her stomach was also doing flip flops, but she decided she had never felt better in her life.

“I am pleased to hear you say that, Raygan. But I did not wish to interrupt what you wished to speak to me about. Please, proceed.” Data looked so open and interested. It made him all the more charming to her.

Somehow her grin got wider. “Actually, I was going to ask you the same thing.” She laughed. “So, what do we do now?” she asked, still unable to stop grinning.

“Perhaps it would be wise for you to consider the ramifications of this decision, Raygan. You do understand I do not have emotions. I cannot-“ Data unexpectedly rose from the couch and looked over at the mirrored case.

Raygan got to her feet, following Data as he made his way to the case. He stood before it staring. She came to his side and put her hand in his, giving it a squeeze. “I take it there is a down side to this chip,” she said.

“Possibly. I need to tell you about my brother, Lore.”

They walked back to the couch where Data told Raygan about the encounters with Lore. How Lore had stolen the emotion chip meant for him and how it had later been damaged when he had fired his phaser at Lore to disable him.

"I was going to destroy it however Geordi stopped me. It has been in that case ever since," Data recounted.

"Data, are you considering installing the emotion chip?" Raygan asked.

"Yes," he replied, his eyes transfixed on the glass case.

"Promise me you won't do it because you think I want you too."

Data looked stunned. “You do understand that-“

“Data, I care for you just as you are. I spend time with you because I want to get to know who you are, not what you could become if you used that chip. You’re worried about it. What is it that worries you?” she asked, again reaching for his hand. Data laced his fingers with hers as he had seen many lovers do and looked down at their hands.

“There is the possibility that, with emotions, I would change. Dramatically.” He looked in her eyes. “You and others may not like the changes. There is also the possibility I could become like Lore or the chip may not work at all.”

“You think it could hurt you?” she asked.

“There is the possibility as it was damaged. By installing it, I too could become damaged.”

“Then don’t install it. It’s not worth the risk.”

Data again glanced over at the floating chip and then back at the woman whose hand held his. “I am not certain I agree. There is an element of risk involved in everything we do. Commander Riker once told me that with risk come rewards. I want to feel for you what you feel for me, Raygan. If there is the slightest possibility of achieving that by installing the chip then I am willing to take that risk."

"Please make your decision carefully, Data. Have you spoken to anyone else about this? Geordi?" Raygan asked.

"Counselor Troi did ask me today if I was considering installing the chip however you are the only person I have discussed this with."

"Please, Data, talk to Geordi. I don't want you to be damaged."

"I will have no choice but to discuss it with him, Raygan. He will be the one to install it. Do not worry. Should I decide I wish to proceed, we will take every precaution."

"What are the dangers, specifically?" Raygan moved closer to him and held his hand tighter as she asked.

"The location where the chip would be installed is a vital area. If it were to cause a power surge or to malfunction...there are a multitude of possibilities. There is also the chance it will function perfectly." Data studied the eyes full of concern that faced him.

"That does not sound very encouraging, Data. You're saying this could possibly kill you, aren't you?"

"I cannot predict what will happen with any certainty as there are too many unknowns, but there is that chance. Yes."

To Data's surprise, he saw a tear roll down Raygan's face.

"Then don't do it, Data. It's not worth the risk," she urged him.

"Ira Graves once compared my existence to a walking purgatory. I am beginning to agree." Data wiped the tear away from Raygan's cheek. "I exist, Raygan, but, more and more, I am discovering I do not live. I want to experience the emotions that come with a simple act such as holding hands."

"Whatever you decide Data, be careful. I just found you. I don't want to lose you."

Data stood in front of the glass and mirrored case again. Raygan had left thirty-eight minutes ago after giving Data a hug, squeezing him tightly. She should have been happy, Data told himself. He wanted to make her happy. He did not wish to worry or frighten her.

Data replayed the moment when he had told her how he wanted their relationship to change. He knew she had been embarrassed at her own response but, for Data, it confirmed it was indeed what she wanted. Raygan wanted him. But, like Jenna and Tasha, would she find that having was not so pleasing a thing as wanting?

Data did not think this was the right time to speak to Geordi. He wanted to wait until Raygan was calmer.

Raygan did not see Data the next day. She had received a request from Admiral T'Vel, the head of Starfleet Command's Stellar Sciences Directorate, for a detailed report on the Enterprise's activities over the past three months. A Vulcan's concept of a detailed report was a little different from most and, of course, he wanted it in three days. Raygan was disappointed she would not make it to Lieutenant Worf's promotion ceremony. Although she had only met the Klingon on a few occasions, she had wanted to attend if only to see Data in the replica uniform the officers traditionally wore. She thought he would look so sexy but thoughts like those were not helping her with the report.

The promotion ceremony went off without a hitch, until it actually began. Commander Riker uttered one ‘wrong’ word and the plank under Worf vanished. It was intriguing to see the expression on the Klingon’s face as he plunged into the water. Data, however, made a rather large error in judgment following that moment and, in an attempt to be spontaneous, he pushed Dr. Crusher into the water as well. This had not gone over well. The attack on an observatory had gotten him out of hot water for the time being but, later, Geordi suggested Data stay out of sickbay for a while. Data found himself again pulled towards that glass case. But this time, with Geordi there, and since they had the time, Data did more than just look. Geordi was not sure about doing this, but Data knew how to be persuasive when he needed to be.

Data had no way of being prepared for what he was about to face. The emotions were so strong. The next few days were such a blur to Data, he was actually relieved Raygan was so busy working on the report for Admiral T'Vel that she did not witness the turmoil he was going through. He found he was unable to control the emotions he was feeling. The uncontrollable laughter, the profound fear, the terror when the chip fused to his neural net but, mostly, the guilt over what had happened to Geordi on the observatory.

When the Duras sisters had attacked the Enterprise, Data did his best to focus on his duties but the chip was still causing him problems. The events surrounding the warp core breach all happened so quickly. Data was finally able to get his emotions more under control until the explosion pushed the saucer section of the Enterprise through the atmosphere of Veridian IV, hurtling it towards the planet below. Data was scared, not for himself, but for Raygan's safety.

The saucer section was mostly in one piece, but there had been extensive damage and hundreds of injuries. Data managed to find a moment to access the current list of reported injured just as a name was added - Raygan’s. Very few patients actually had their injuries listed, there simply were too many in too short a time for this to be done. This listing was only so those found could be recorded. Data had much work to do in helping with the search. His strength was needed. Data was working with Deanna, using a tricorder to locate the missing when they came to Stellar Sciences. The room was a frightening sight. The raised platform had been destroyed. It had crashed down into the room, taking out all of the workstations beneath it.

As Data and Deanna picked their way through, many other people became evident. Data spotted Lieutenant Palmer and called to him.

“Lieutenant, are there any personnel unaccounted for in this section?”

“No, sir,” Palmer turned with a bright smile to face Data, but he did not come over. “Hey!” he called, gesturing to his right for someone to come towards him.

Raygan came out from under some rubble a second later.

“Raygan!” Data exclaimed. She locked eyes with Data and he found he was moving towards her but he could not recall deciding to do so. She looked fine. She was dirty, perspiring and her uniform was torn at the shoulder, but Data thought she was the most beautiful person he had ever seen in his life.

Raygan smiled up at him and Data could not contain his joy or wait another second. Reaching for her, he pulled her immediately into his arms and kissed her. The emotions that raced through him were numerous, strong and very welcome. When Raygan wrapped her arms around him, Data was propelled to heights he had never imagined.

Data had to return to the search for more wounded while Raygan stayed in what was left of Stellar Sciences to sift through the piles of debris. She was amazed there had been no reported fatalities in her section as she looked around at the destruction. Matt was helping her see if there was anything salvageable in the wreckage when he came across a destroyed PADD on what was left of Raygan's desk. He turned to her and smiled.

"Do you think Admiral T'Vel will understand why your report will be late?" They both laughed. She needed to laugh at that moment otherwise she would have started to cry at the destruction around her. 

“You can not only blame the ship crashing, but you can say that a certain lieutenant commander has been keeping you too busy to worry about goofy things like reports,” Matt smirked at her.

Raygan blushed. Data’s reaction to seeing her had been something Raygan was trying not to think of. If she let her mind wander for a second, he was there in her mind’s eye. She needed to stay sharp now, so she did not have the luxury of thinking about Data right now, but when she did, she wanted to do more than just think about him.