As Good As It Gets

by katie rose

Jessica looked down at her small hands clasped within Ryan's beautiful fingers, her heart beating erratically with hope. The happy tears that threatened to fall; she blinked them back quickly.

"You really mean it?"

Ryan smiled, making his eyes crinkle at the edges. "Yes. I want you to be with me always, and I've thought about it a lot. What kind of example would I be to our kids if we just moved in together? I can hear my son's voice already. 'If you really lover her Dad, then why won't you marry her?' I knew he would have been right, so I beat him to the punch."

"So it is a 10-year-old I have to thank?"

"Unwittingly, I guess so. Well? What do you think? Jessica, will you marry me?"

She took a deep, calming breath. "After all these years, with the two of us living 400 miles apart, I always hoped it would work out that the two of us could be together. Marriage is more than I dared to hope for. Yes, Ryan, I will marry you."

She threw her arms around him and held him, matching as closely as she could the pressure of the arms that encircled her and held her to his lap. Their love, she knew, was right.

From the outside world they didn't appear to be a likely couple, primarily due to their age difference. The year she was born, he was graduating from high school. The year she graduated he was playing music and making a name for himself. At 37 she had a level head yet a romantic heart, and Ryan's maturity, intelligence and experienced sexuality had always drawn her to him.

She kissed his neck, nuzzling into him closer. Teasing him, she nipped at his earlobe.

"Besides, it makes more economic sense. Six-hour drives, hotel rooms, two houses, tons of phone bills..." He let the words have the effect that he knew they would cause.

Jessica sat upright. "So, that's what it is? You just want me for my money!" The accusing tone was softened by her smile. They both laughed then; knowing the line couldn't be further from the truth. Being a single mom in the ever-changing business world made for shaky financial ground at times.

"Yep. You found me out." He then leaned forward and lovingly brushed his lips across her own.

~~~~~~~~~~

Jessica strummed her fingers across the steering wheel as she stopped at the end of the driveway of her new home, watching as Ryan backed the trailer up to the garage. The grass around the house was just starting to fill in nicely. It seemed that only yesterday Ryan was picking out the design for his new house. She had told him that according to the plans she had seen it looked too big for just him and his kids. Now she understood. He had been considering her and her children when he planned it.

Now it was built and it was to be their home. It was beautiful, and bigger than she had expected with an open porch that wrapped around two sides of the house. She had seen the site when the foundation was poured, but she somehow could never actually picture a house nestled within the clearing of the woods. Of course she had been curious, and he had sent her pictures, but because of the way their schedules had been of late, it had been easier for him to travel to see her and the kids. Her mind wandered. So much had happened, so quickly.

They had told her children and parents in the same day, and the following week, before her closest friends and family they were married - husband and wife forever.

Biting on her lip, she considered her last failed marriage. Four years had been the longest she had been able to fight for it. She never should have been married. They were both too immature, and eventually after she realized promises had been irrevocably broken, she vowed to show her children that living the way that they had been was not normal. She could show them more love if she didn't constantly desire to throttle their father.

Now she was married again. There was absolutely no doubt that Ryan loved her. Even in the time they had been together, yet unmarried, they had behaved as a couple. It had not been all sweetness and flowers, but they had dealt with real life situations, both the highs and the lows: his divorce, her developing of her business, and his beautiful music all helped to strengthen the bond between them. Through it all they worked together, bouncing ideas off each other, asking for opinions, and helping wherever they could. Give and take, that's what it was all about. And honesty. For without it they never would have met in the first place.

Ryan motioned to where he wanted her to park, and she pulled her car, loaded with more boxes, to the end of the walk that lead to the front door.

Getting out, she met him half way around her vehicle.

He wrapped her within the warmth of his arms and held her to him. "Welcome to our new home."

She smiled and kissed him gently. "Thank you."

Arm in arm they walked up the sidewalk to the house.

"I almost can't believe you're here."

"I better be, since now I'm your wife."

He squeezed her to his side. "You know what I mean. I bet your dad wishes all house sales went as quickly as yours."

"No kidding. Being the good sister-in-law that I am I knew Kate would want to buy it. She's joked about it enough."

They reached the entry and he fished in his pocket for his keys, and unlocked it the door.

Grabbing her by the waist he attempted to pick her up to carry her across the threshold in the traditional bridal welcome.

"Oh, no you don't," she admonished. "You think I want you screwing up your back on my honeymoon? Can you imagine the teasing I'd have to live down when that bit of information leaked out to my family? No way." She successfully held him at bay.

"Okay. I can think of more fun ways to do it anyhow." Reaching forward he started to open the buttons on her blouse. They both watched as his fingers fumbled to open first one button, and then the next, and continue until the entire thing hung open. Peeling the fabric aside, he unhooked the front clasp of her bra.

"What do you think you are doing?"

His eyes twinkled with amusement. "I'm welcoming my bride home." His thumbs brushed gently across the flesh, causing goose bumps to rise to the surface. Then cupping their fullness in his hands, and leaning forward, he slid the nipple and flesh that surrounded it into his mouth.

Her eyes drifted shut. She arched back and pressed her lower body into his warmth, causing them both to almost lose their balance. But, he held her body firm, and moved their legs in a countering direction. The heat moved languidly through her veins, not allowing her limbs to function correctly.

It wasn't until he removed his mouth, and the cool air danced across her puckered nipple, that she opened her eyes to realize they were inside the house.

She gasped at the sight before her, and Ryan lifted his head to see what had surprised her.

"Oh, Ryan. It's beautiful."

He smiled again and kissed her before snapping her bra back together. "Welcome home."

They were standing in the foyer, which lead into one huge room. It contained a living area, dining area, and a totally open kitchen. Dominating the kitchen was an island that looked big enough to accommodate a party of ten, but which only six stools set around. But what had made her gasp was the fireplace. The fieldstone stretched from the floor all the way to the ceiling.

"How high is that?"

Laughing, he answered, "Twenty-two feet."

"And look at the windows. They're everywhere!" She poked him in the side. "Good thing the neighbors are far enough away. You know what they say, 'People who live in glass houses..."

"Need tall ladders," he finished for her.

Joking with him was always so much fun. Now she was excited to see the rest of the house. She pulled him along by the arm. "Show me."

"First you better button that shirt or when we get to our bedroom I may not be able to help myself."

As she walked down the hall, she did as she was told.

It was a simple floor plan really. A full guest bath and guest bedroom, a library with comfortable looking furniture and books that lined the shelves against the walls, a laundry, and an office were the only other rooms on the main floor.

At the door to the office she stopped and stared. "Two desks?"

"Why not? If you're going to work out of the house, you need a place for your stuff too. I've also got a couple of extra file cabinets to move in yet, and I already had them run another phone line in."

His gesture had touched her deeply and she brushed her hand over his cheek.

"Come see the rest." Her excitement was infectious, and he pulled her toward the open staircase that lead off the living room and to the upper level.

At the balcony he stopped so that she could admire the view out the upper windows of the dining area and into the woods that abutted the yard. "It's beautiful," was all her dumbstruck brain could come up with.

"For a woman who works with words everyday you could use a thesaurus," he teased. "Come."

Another full bath and two more bedrooms, each with two single beds were next. One decorated in masculine green, blue, and red, the other in feminine yellow, pink and powder blue.

She kissed the back of his hand. "You have been busy."

"Think they'll like it?"

"I'm sure they will. When will your kids be here?"

"In two weeks," he explained. "They wanted to come today already, but I explained we needed some time to get things set up for everyone."

"Good. My kids will be here the following week, and school will start the week after. I still can't believe I won't see them for three weeks. Boy, I'll miss them. But I just felt it is right that they spend the rest of the summer with their dad, if they're gong to be moving here with us. Do you think I'm right?"

"You know what's best for them. Besides, it does give us some time to spend together before we're bombarded with children. I just wish I didn't have to leave tomorrow and cut this honeymoon short. I tried, but I couldn't reschedule the meetings."

She kissed him then. "It's okay. I'll still be your wife when you get back. Now, would you show me the rest?"

He took her hand and led her across the hall into the master bedroom. It was huge, with a queen-sized bed and plenty of dressers. Off the bedroom was a walk-in closet that lead to a full bath complete with a hot tub big enough for four, a separate tub, a shower with a seat, a vanity with double sinks, and a stool. Everything was decorated in sandy colored marble tile with cream and gold accents.

"Can I just spend all my time in here?" She asked as she turned in a circle, taking in the luxuriousness of it all. "This is a woman's dream bathroom."

"I know. My sister gave me some pointers."

"I'll have to thank her. There's one more area I want to see."

"The basement?"

"Yep."

"Then let's go."

Backtracking through the house they followed the open staircase in the opposite direction to the basement. Everything was finished down there too. There was a family room, a functional kitchen and eating area, another full bath, a workroom, and then the room that was what she had been waiting for, the music room.

Crates that held music, cd's, and old vinyl records lined one whole wall. To the right through a glass-topped door, she could see the small recording studio. Everywhere she looked there was a guitar of some type or another. Quite out of place was a Lazyboy recliner.

She smiled as she looked at it. "That's where I get to sit and watch you make music for me?"

"If that is what you'd like. That chair has held me many a time while I talked with you." He sat in the chair and pulled her onto his lap.

She wiggled to make herself more comfortable.

"Keep doing that and we won't get a thing unloaded."

"Oh, yes we would. There is one thing we could unload," she teased.

He groaned at her double meaning and proceeded to kiss her thoroughly. His hand slid back up under her shirt and caressed her soft skin.

The ring of the phone brought them both to their senses and she pulled away from him.

"Let the machine get it," he suggested.

"No. It might be one of our kids."

He groaned his frustration and reached for the phone.

"Hello?" He smiled and cupped his hand over the mouthpiece. "You were right."

"Yes, John, we just got back. Yes, she's with me."

Jessica got up and mouthed that she was going upstairs and blew him a kiss.

"Yes, son. I am very happy that she's finally here."

~~~~~~~~~~~

"Here, let me get the door"

Jessica stepped out and held the door as Ryan passed through carrying yet another box full of her possessions.

"Is there more?"

"No, this is the last of it. Where would you like it? It looks like mostly books for work."

"Well, do you think you could find a spare shelf in your, I mean our office for it?" She smiled up at him.

"Yes, I think there may be one in OUR office." He bent over and placed a quick kiss on her lips.

"Thanks." As he walked down the hall she took a quick look around her new surroundings. She liked this house. Now, it was their house. The living room was scattered with boxes filled with of all of her belongings. Eventually everything would be put in its place, but for now she just had to find a spot to put everything until she could go through it all.

She wandered down the hall to the office where Ryan set the box near a shelf and was placing her books next to his. Kneeling behind and wrapping her arms around him, she kissed the back of his neck.

"You keep that up and we'll never get you unpacked," he warned.

"And you mind?" She continued kissing and licking along the muscles of his neck, tasting the salty sweat of the day.

"No, but you'll end up doing the rest of it on you own while I'm gone this week." He hesitated in mid-placement of the books in his hands.

"Okay, I'll be good. She turned and grabbed another box and started to unpack it into her desk. Bending over to grab a hand full of folders, she felt him move behind her and grab her hips.

"I did warn you that I was going to fuck you in my office."

"Yes, you did," she smiled and dropped the files into the drawer.

Leaning forward he whispered in her ear, "Honey, can I fuck you on my desk?"

"I thought we had boxes to unpack."

"We will." He reached around her and slid his hands between her thighs and put pressure on her mound as she brushed her backside along the hardness in his jeans.

"Besides, I need a shower. I'm all sticky and sweaty."

"I like you like that."

"Sounds gross." She wrinkled her nose.

"So, can I?"

"Can't wait until I take a shower?"

"Nope." He drew his hands up her body over the slight mound of her stomach to cup her breast.

"You have a one-track mind."

"I know. To my desk, " he ordered.

"Not mine?" she teased.

"No." It was a husky whisper.

She moved over to the large wooden desk. The top was nearly cleared with the exception of the computer monitor and a couple of papers. Placing the papers aside, he then began opening her jeans and pulled them and her panties to the ground.

"Up you go."

She hopped up onto the desk while he removed his own jeans.

"Do you know how many times I sat at this very desk and fantasized about doing this to you?"

She smiled.

"Do you have any idea how many times I've stroked myself off at this desk while you talked sexy to me?"

"Some."

He pulled his chair closer and sat down. "Do you have any idea how many times I thought about eating your pussy while you sat on my desk?"

She smiled again and leaned back on her elbows.

He lifted her legs and placed them on the arms of the chair, opening her pussy to him. Wrapping his arms under her legs he bent forward and licked her outer lips. His breath warmed her thighs and pussy.

"I love your pussy Honey." He inhaled the sexy, musky odor of aroused woman. "I bet that if I dip my tongue between those folds I'll find you nice and wet for me."

He licked again deeper and pulled her hips closer to him. Gently he teased her clit, feeling it grow under his tongue. Her muscles jumped in response.

She watched as he again licked along the length of her and then dipped his tongue directly into her, fucking her with it. Withdrawing his tongue he replaced it with his fingers of one hand while he reached up under her shirt to play with her tits. The trace of stubble brushed over her bare pussy as he nuzzled against her folds, coating his face with her moisture. Then he returned to concentrate his efforts on her swollen clit. He firmly rolled her nipple between his fingers as he swirled his tongue over the button. Over and over he did this while pumping two of his fingers in and out of her, reaching ever deeper and putting pressure along her special spot.

Closing her eyes and throwing back her head she felt the first ripples of her orgasm building. "Yes, oh God, yes. Right there." She thrust her hips back up at his face as the sensations tightened her muscles throughout her body. "Yessss," she hissed with muscles tensing, the flood of sensations washed over her as she reached her peak.

Slowly she relaxed as her orgasm subsided. Looking down at him, his face slick with her juices, she saw him smiling up at her. "Come here Baby, and fuck me."

"Uh huh." He stood and his dick jutted out, fully erect.

Leaning on one arm, she reached forward and slid her hand between her lips and wet it, then placed her wet palm around his cock and stroked him. His cock was very warm to her touch as the blood pumped and filled it, thickening it, and making the head nice and purple.

"That is so dirty. Lay back and touch yourself for me again."

She did as he requested and slid closer to the edge of the desk. Her fingers dipped into her pussy, pulling some of her come up and over her clit and then she started the rhythm and motions she loved.

Moving in closer to her he guided his cock just to her opening, teasing her just with the tip as he watched her fingers continue their slippery teasing. Gently he pushed forward, slowing sinking his entire length into her. Their mutual moans filled the room. Slowly he pulled back out and then with her legs draped over his arms he pulled on her hips and again pressed back in.

"Yeah, that's it. Play with yourself Jessica. Make yourself come on my dick." Again he stroked in and out of her, using the entire length of his cock. She whimpered as he continued fucking her with those long, slow strokes. She could feel the pressure building again and she knew she would be coming for him. "You want me to come, Honey? I'm going to. Oh God I'm going to. Fuck me harder."

He leaned forward and forced his cock hard into her. "You want me to fuck you hard? You want to feel my cock slamming into you?" His actions mimicked his words and his hips move forcefully against her, crushing her fingers between them in the bump and grind they were performing. His thighs slapped against the front of the desk.

"Yes. Yes." Her tongue darted out to lick her lips. Her orgasm broke; the muscles in her pussy tightened and she gripped his cock as he forced it between her swollen labia.

"Yeah, Baby. Yeah." His cries of triumph mingled with her own as his cock burst forth and pumped deep inside of her.

After several minutes spent regaining their breathing, he released her legs, pulled her to him and wrapped her in his arms.

"Thank you." He looked down at her face, flushed from the exertion of her orgasm. "One fantasy fulfilled and many more to come. I do love you, and I am so happy you are here with me finally."

She smiled. "So am I, Love." They shared a most tender kiss.

"We definitely will have to get a lock on the door. I can tell this is one fantasy I'd like to do again."

They laughed, then disengaged themselves and started to dress.

After he had finished dressing he returned to the box he had been unloading. Bending over he picked up one of the books.

"Honey, what is this? I remember seeing it somewhere."

He was holding up a wire bound journal with a paisley swirled pattern in blues and purples on the cover.

She smiled again. "That is the journal that I was writing in the first time we met."

"I thought you said you had been writing a letter."

"I was sort of, but mostly to myself. I wanted to remember our first time together forever."

"Did you think I'd let you forget?"

"No, but that was a long time ago. There were a lot of decisions that needed to be made before we got to where we are now. Things were not quite so certain."

"Oh." He looked down at the book in his hand and contemplated its contents.

"Would you like to read it?"

"Really?"

"It's not a masterpiece, but sure. You were a part of it. Why don't you take it along with you tomorrow on your trip? You can read it at night when I can't be with you."

"Okay." He placed it on his desk along with the papers.

She glanced at the on the office wall. "We better get moving or we'll never be able to find the living room." She kissed him one more time and turned, leaving him to put away the remainder of the books.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ryan dropped his duffle bag on the floor, placed his briefcase on the desk and flopped down on the too hard bed. What a day. A three-hour drive followed by non-stop meetings. Topped off by a luscious, lonely meal at Subway.

'God, I wish I was at home with Jessica. Right now we could be having a relaxing dinner together followed by a nice, slow lovemaking session.'

He stood, stripped off his clothes and headed for the shower. Once he was out he wrapped a towel around his waist and went to call her.

"Hello?"

"Hi there."

"Hi." He could hear the smile in her voice. "How was your day?"

"Long. The meetings were productive though. How's the unpacking going?"

"Well, we have a living room again. I started on the kid's stuff this evening and hope to finish before I head for bed. Sure wish you were here to join me." He heard the disappointment in her voice.

"Me too," he agreed. "I've got everything set for tomorrow's meetings so I'm probably just going to flip through the channels for a bit and then I thought I'd take a look at that journal."

"Ah. Well, have fun. Remember, that was written a long time ago."

"I remember. I'll call you again tomorrow, and then be home after Wednesday's meetings, but probably not until late that night. You might even be in bed by the time I get there."

"Okay. I love you Honey."

"I love you too." He placed the receiver back on the cradle.

Going to his briefcase, he removed the journal and returned with it to the bed. Propping himself up with pillows he flipped through the channels, stopping briefly to watch the last part of a documentary. Turning off the TV he opened the journal.

`````````````````````

April 29th.

Since I have some time to spare I thought I'd keep a journal about this special occasion.

I left home at 7:10 AM hoping I had planned enough time and that I wasn't forgetting anything. Five miles down the road I remembered the hotel phone number and confirmation number sitting on the kitchen table.

The directions through Chicago were easy enough to follow. Just take Interstate-94 all the way. I made good time.

Getting there an hour early I checked on the room and everything is ready. I called him, and he's about half an hour out yet. He says his dick is hard already and I know I'm wet. I can't believe today has finally arrived, though it really hasn't been that long, only two and a half months.

We say we just want to see where this is going to, yet we talk of being together in the future, both near and far. Nobody who knew I was coming here could believe I was actually meeting with someone I met on the Internet. There are so many horror stories out there. Even though I'm a 33-year-old divorced woman, my parent's would have a collective heart attack if they knew. So far it's been easy for me to keep my parent's in the dark.

I feel like I'm a teenager again, sneaking out to go to a forbidden party, and then pay the consequences when found out. It doesn't matter though because they won't understand. But the others are curious and have given me strict warnings that they want all the details when I get back. A family newsletter probably isn't a bad idea.

How about:

Dear Family,

We met, we fucked, we came, again and again, we both returned to our homes. We're going to do it again.

He's here.

`````````````````

Ryan shook his head while he chuckled. He remembered their conversation about telling her family. While her kids had accepted him right from the beginning, it did take some time before she finally gained enough courage to tell her parents that he existed in her life. Considering how they had met on the net, he couldn't blame her parents for their trepidation.

Her father was quicker to come around. Since they were the same age and both business owners they found plenty that they had in common. Her mother was more reserved, but finally she was forced to see how happy Jessica was and that Ryan hopelessly loved their daughter.

He would never willingly do anything to hurt Jessica. The simple fact was, she was the one that was genuine. She was honest to a fault. Hiding his existence had nearly driven her apart from her parents.

She listened to Ryan's ideas, offered her thoughts, but never ranted if he didn't follow her views on a situation.

He turned his attention back to the journal.

```````````````````

This was amazing. Like something out of some sexy, sappy, romantic movie.

I looked up and he was standing beside my car. I stepped out and he immediately scooped me into his arms. I was touching him. Filling my arms. And he held me so tightly to him. His arms wrapped around my waist pulling me to him. He rubbed his hardened cock against my stomach, stopping to press into me as I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on.

Then he pulled back, smiled at me, and bent down to kiss me. Not a sweet, tender first kiss, but a hot kiss, full of passion. His tongue probing into my mouth desperately sought mine. I ran my fingers through the soft, wavy curls of his hair.

His hands traveled to my hips and around to my backside, pulling up on my dress. We were like a couple of teenagers making out in the lot between two parked cars. At some point I realized we were doing it right in front of the big window of the hotel restaurant. He must have thought of something similar because that's when we broke and he smiled down at me. Breathlessly he said, "Let's go to our room."

We held hands and touched during the whole check in process. We got our key and moved our vehicles to the back, then carried in our bags along with his guitar. I locked the door while he closed the curtains and again we were in each other's arms.

He pulled up on my dress once more. "Are you wet for me Honey?" Slowly he raised the dress further, bunching the material around my waist and moved his hands between my thighs. I placed one foot on the bed giving him better access.

"Oh yes, you are Honey. You've wet right through your panties!" He slid two fingers under the satin and slipped them between my pussy lips stroking them back and forth.

The anticipation of the touch just couldn't compare to the real thing. All the words of warning, all the tempting promises could not prepare me for the feeling of his mouth on mine, combined with his chest pressing against me, and his fingers exploring me. He had me so close to coming right then. But we had plans. We'd talked it all out ahead of time. He had wanted me in his mouth the first time I came for him. But I was so close already. I moaned as I felt the pressure building and held him tighter to me.

He gently touched my shaven outer lips, stroking along the smooth, damp skin. We continued to kiss and his lips traveled down my neck causing me to moan again. His nibbles along the tender area became stronger. Then quickly he dipped his fingers between my folds again. His fingers probed and stroked, spreading the wetness even more. His entire hand was soaked with my honey and he worked his fingers even deeper within me, learning all the special buttons to push.

My hands traveled over his body, seeking his arousal. I rubbed and massaged his hardness through the denim creating a warm friction under my hand. He moaned into my neck.

Just when I thought it was either come or die, he pulled his hand away.

In a low rumble he requested, "Honey, take your dress off. I'm going to make love to you and your wet pussy."

````````````````````

Ryan flipped back the edge of the towel, releasing his stiffened cock from the confines.

He had no idea that her journal was going to be so explicit. He should have guessed though, with her gift of words and delight in the details.

Slowly he stroked his hand up and down his shaft, feeling it harden and thicken with his attention. If this journal continued as he suspected that it would, he was in for a mixture of pleasure and pain.

```````````````````

I pulled the dress over my head revealing the red lace bra and high cut lace panties. For a moment I just stood there watching him remove his clothing. I had wanted to do it for him, but there would come another time. A time when our need was not so great, although at that time I wondered if there would ever be a day like that in our future.

I'd seen his picture, but it was nothing like the real person who was undressing in front of me. This body was real. This was the body he was working to get stronger and fit and his hard work was showing. His biceps bulged as he moved. This body was hard in all the right places. His pectoral muscles flexed as he pulled his shirt over his head.

I stood there almost shyly want to hide my imperfect body. I turned away from him to remove my bra, but then he was behind me.

"I'll do it," he whispered.

Unhooking the clasp he slid the straps from my shoulders, kissing the same path the straps had gone. I could feel his hardened dick pressing into my backside, bumping against me. He tossed the scrap of material to the floor. Reaching around me he played with my tits, rolling the nubs in his fingers and gently squeezing and caressing the flesh until it jiggled in his hands.

"I like your breasts. They're not perfect, but they're real. They're you."

Sliding his hands over the curves of my body until he reached the waistband of my panties, he slowly pulled them to the floor.

"Much better," he said as he patted me on my ass. "Into bed."

Again I complied, sliding under the sheets to cover my nakedness. Climbing in next to me he again claimed my lips and we locked in a body-entwining embrace. Our legs wrapped around each other as our hands and mouths explored the bodies we had lusted after for so long. I wanted him so badly.

I snaked my hand between our bodies seeking his cock and I stroked its velvety hardness. He was this way because of me. He wanted me as badly as I did him. His hand again made it's way between my thighs.

"Boy, your pussy is so wet Honey." His slick fingers probed and found my clit and he began the rhythmic pulses and flicks that had been driving me crazy. "Is that all right?"

"Oh yes, Ryan. Just like that. God, that feels good."

I found myself making those strange love moans, alternating between the sharp intakes of breath caused by his touch. I needed to feel his lips upon mine and I tugged him even closer to me. He cupped my mound with his entire hand then slid his fingers in and out of me. All the sensations I had been feeling had me building up to my climax, but now it became a need, a hunger.

"Are you going to come for your man?"

I whimpered.

"Come on honey, you can do it. Come for your man. Come for me."

His voice coaxing and urging huskily in my ear went right to my pussy and I clung to him. My hips bucked against his hand and he held me tighter to him, keeping the contact of fingers to pussy.

"Ahh. Oh, yes. Oh, God, yes." Every muscle in my body tensed with the force of that orgasm.

"There you go. That's my girl. Yes, come for me Honey."

I continued to writhe underneath the strokes of his hand until slowly my body came back to earth.

"My, my, my, you are responsive. That's it," he cooed in my ear, "just relax."

A layer of sweat covered my body. My chest heaved with the task of taking in enough air to keep me conscious, but eventually my pulse slowed and my body calmed.

"Thank you." I whispered into his chest. It was all that I could manage to say. I blinked quickly to abate the happy tears that threatened.

We lay there for a bit; me enfolded in the security of his arms. I listened to his heart beating within his chest. Finally I had the strength to move and I slid my hand down his back, continuing across his ass cheeks, cupping them in my hand.

Suddenly he reached down and flipped all the covers off our bodies. Ryan slowly kissed a path down my body. I was totally exposed to him. I felt somewhat embarrassed, but he didn't care. He was loving every part of me from my less than firm boobs to the faint marks that marred my sides. He kissed every one and continued moving lower nipping at the tops of my thighs. His hands followed the trail his mouth had taken and he caressed the flesh beneath them.

Never once in this time that we were together did he give me time to doubt my body. The minute a shameful thought would enter my mind, he was there with a word or touch that removed the feeling, making me feel like I was the most beautiful woman on the earth. Even if I didn't think I was, he did, and that was all that mattered at that moment. He is such a special man.

His mouth continued moving closer and closer to my pussy. "I'm going to make love to your clit. I want you to come for me, but this is very important. I want you in my mouth when you come. I want to feel you coming in my mouth. I need that. Tell me when, Baby."

"Okay," I murmured.

This is what we had talked about. It was such a simple request, yet one that I knew meant so much to him. It was his dream, his desire to feel me at my most abandoned moment beneath him.

He started then to lick my entire pussy, from bottom to top. The long strokes of his tongue fueled the passion within me.

"Honey, hold your lips open for me."

I reached down and pulled the labia back. As I was already wet, my fingers slid across the smooth skin. His breath warmed the inside of my thigh, and then his tongue reached out and gently touched my clit. My muscles jumped of their own accord, and he moved to lick the area around it, getting closer with each pass of the tongue.

He took his time letting the excitement build in my body. I felt the tickle of his beard across my clit and he moved to concentrate his attention on it while inserting two fingers into my pussy. I moaned as he slid in and out, fucking me with them and driving me into a frenzy.

"Yes, just like that," I told him.

And when I knew my orgasm was upon me I warned him. "I'm gonna come Honey. Oh yeah, right...."

He moved up and took my entire clit into his mouth and lavished it with his tongue as I came. I bucked up against him and he held me tightly to his lips.

"Oh God!" I gasped. Every muscle of my body had tensed, and now they were turning to liquid.

Then slowly he kissed back up my body to kiss my lips and nestled himself between my thighs. Bracing his weight on his elbows he placed his hands on my flushed cheeks.

"You know what I want now?"

```````````````````````

Ryan closed his eyes. Her words had him picturing it as if it happened only hours ago, instead of three years.

He remembered her wetness, the smell of her skin as he climbed up the length of her body. She was his, and would always be, no matter what happened.

He stroked his cock again, bringing himself closer to the release he desired so much, yet he wasn't ready to give into it.

```````````````

"Uh huh. You want to fuck me." I licked my lips that were suddenly dry. "You want to slide your cock right into my pussy and fuck me. And I'm going to let you do it. I'm going to lay right here and take what you give me. You can do just what you want. I'm here only for you."

He pressed against my wet cunt, yet restrained himself.

The words spilled from my lips in a lusty whisper. "You've turned me into such a slut. I could never be this way for anyone else. I'd do anything just for you. You want to fuck me Baby? Go ahead. Fuck your slut."

He groaned and finally let himself do what he had waited so long to do. He pushed forward and slid his cock right into my waiting pussy, filling me completely. Tightly, my warmth wrapped around him.

"God you feel good," he whispered.

Quietly I moaned my response and tightened my grip around his cock.

He smiled down at me and pulled himself out, almost totally and then slowly pressed back in. "So you like me fucking you?"

"Yes."

He stoked himself, torturously slow, in and out again.

"And you're going to be a good girl and just take the fucking I'm going to give you?"

"Yes."

Again he stroked.

I raised my legs, allowing him to sink to a greater depth. Now when he pushed forward his pubic bone pressed against my clit. I moaned again, knowing the feeling that was building inside if me.

"Are you going to come again for me?" He asked, surprised.

I ducked my head almost in shame. I couldn't believe the way my body was responding to him. "I can't help it." I felt like the slut he would so lovingly referred to me as while we would speak on the phone.

Hesitating his stroking he waited until I looked at him. "Honey, you can never be too wet, or too horny for me." The kiss started sweetly, but as he added the stroking the passion between us took over and again the tenseness and quivering of my body told him I was going to come soon.

"That's right Baby, come on my dick."

My legs wrapped around his and our bodies slapped together as he pushed his cock deep inside me. I cried out again as the first waves of ecstasy washed over me and I clung to him while he rode me through it.

"Oh, yes. That's a good girl."

Again he stroked and I rode the wave of sensations that broke through me. Emotionally he slid a little tighter into my heart.

He slowed, and then stopped his movements allowing me to catch my breath. I could feel the perspiration between my breasts.

"You okay?"

"Uh huh." I smiled lazily up at him. I hesitated for a minute wondering if I should be so bold and say just what was on my mind. "Can we do something?"

"Sure. What do you want, Love?"

Still feeling his cock filling me I asked, "After all the times that you stroked your cock for me while I talked to you over the phone, I'd love to watch you do it for me."

"Anything you want," he smiled.

Slowly he pulled his cock free of my body and lay down on the bed. I rolled over so that I could be in a great position to watch. As I did, I happened to glance at the clock on the nightstand.

"Oh, my God."

"What?"

I laughed, shaking my head in disbelief. "I don't want to break the mood, but can you believe we've only met each other in person an hour ago?"

"And you came for me three times in the first hour? That's not bad. What's the rest of the weekend going to be like?" He chuckled.

"I don't know, but I can't wait to find out." I snuggled in closer to his body.

He grabbed his cock in his hand. "So you want to watch me come for you?"

"Yes." I leaned forward and licked his nipple.

"Mmm. That feels good."

"Does it?"

"Yes."

I continued to nibble and lick on his pectoral closest to me, paying special attention to the darkened nipple. My free hand explored the rest of his body.

```````````````

Ryan's attention flipped between the pages of the journal and his cock filling his hand.

Stroking faster, his breath matched those that she wrote of.

````````````

With one hand he stroked his hardened member, with the other he cupped his balls close to his body. I watched as he set the rhythm he was accustomed to. The head of his cock engorging with blood, turning it a dark reddish purple. I so wanted to take him in my mouth.

"Let me know when you're getting close because you know what I want. I want you in my mouth when you come. I want to taste you, and hold you, and feel every twitching muscle in my mouth while you deliver that load. Come on Honey. Stroke that cock for me. Teach me just how you like to get yourself off. Show your slut just what you like."

``````````````````

The words came back to him. Her voice coaxing him, telling him just how much she wanted him to come for her.

```````````````````

"Oh yeah. I'll teach you." He continued pulling and tugging on his cock at his steady pace. "I'm gonna come for you, Baby. You want this load? Get ready."

I slid down along his body and waited just above his moving hand so that when the moment was right I'd be there.

"Come on, Honey. Stroke that cock for me. Mmm...Yeah, that looks great. Come on. Show me." I wet my lips in anticipation, inching closer.

``````````````

Ryan pictured her there. Lips wet, waiting for him to deliver his sticky load within her mouth. He scanned back to the page.

``````````````

"Oh, yeah." He pulled his hand away and I quickly replaced it with my mouth, mimicking his tempo until I felt his cock spasm and deposit his semen at the back of my throat. "Oh fuck, yeah." He gasped. A couple more strokes and I swallowed everything that he had given me. And then I did what I knew he loved. I gently and firmly held him between my lips, letting him bask in the great feelings I knew this orgasm gave him.

```````````````

The pressure was beyond holding back and Ryan continued to stroke as he felt the heat rise in his blood, and his come traveling forward until with a groan he finally released his load. It shot forth onto his naked body. Stroke after stroke pumped his creamy fluid; grunts and groans accentuated every shot and shiver that wracked his body, until finally he lay there, his semen pooling on his skin.

With his breathing returning to normal, he opened his eyes, and continued the journal.

```````````````

"Yes, just like that. God that feels good," he whispered.

I tried not to smile. For several minutes I continued to hold him, unmoving except for the occasional necessary swallow, until I felt his hand on the back of my head. As if it was a predetermined signal that the sensitivity had passed, I slowly pulled his cock from my mouth. Gently I licked up and down his shaft, cleansing him of all of the wonderful fluid. When I had finished I snuggled again within his arms, our legs entwined, and we slept. For the first time in our lives we slept together.

````````````

God, he wished she was there to clean him up. She so enjoyed doing that to him. He was a mess and needed another shower. Judging by the way he had just come, you'd think he hadn't had sex in a month, when in reality is had only been last night since he buried himself deeply within his new bride and spilled his seed.

'Damn her. She knew this journal would have this effect on me.'

He reached for the phone and dialed home.

She answered on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Hi," he said. His voice a throaty whisper.

"Hi. I thought you'd be sleeping a long time by now."

"Sure you did. Did you really think I would just drift silently off to sleep after I started reading that journal?"

She chuckled then. "Didn't you find it boring? After all, you already lived it."

"My God, Honey. Want to know just how boring I thought it was? I'm laying here naked covered in come."

"You're kidding!"

"No."

"And you didn't even wait so that I could hear you come for me?"

He knew how much she enjoyed that. "Sorry Hon, but I couldn't stop. If I keep reading this, they're going to find a dead man in my bed come morning, 'cause I'm going to stroke myself to death."

"Oh, come on now. It's not that big of a deal."

"But I am enjoying it immensely. Why didn't you ever tell me about it before?"

"I don't know." She seemed to consider her words carefully. "I guess I was embarrassed after I wrote it. There is not only action in there, there are thoughts too. Now it's not so bad because you're my husband, but at the time I wrote it, we were just getting involved in this long distance relationship and didn't know where we were heading. After a while I just didn't think about it."

"You know I love you, don't you?"

"Yes, Honey. I do know it. Get some sleep," she suggested.

"I will, but first I need a shower."

She groaned on her end of the phone.

"You want to come over here and lick your man clean?"

"You know I do, and now you're teasing me. Go take a shower. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

His laugh filed the room and floated across the miles. "Okay, I'm going. Night Love."

"Good night."

He hung up the phone and grabbed the towel and wiped the remaining come from his chest, stomach and groin. He turned to get out of the bed, but the words 'I want to fuck you again' caught his eye. He picked up the journal and continued to read.

````````````

We dozed and woke again in each other's arms. It was now only five hours since we met, and he had made me come more times than I can count. He had told me when we were checking in that he had a headache, but it was pushed aside and we were wrapped up in each other. We decided that maybe a little food would help and I started to dress. Panties, bra, and sweater on, I stopped to snuggle with him for a little bit. It was just so good to touch him, to hold him within my arms. To touch him with my mouth and to smell his skin next to mine was heaven.

We started to rise. He got out of one side of the bed and I out the other. For some reason I turned and looked at him. He was standing there with only his underwear on, shaking his head.

Before I could ask what was wrong he said, "Honey, take your clothes off. I want to fuck you again."

Never were those memorable words ever spoken to me, and I will never forget them. It was as if he had just resigned himself to the fact that there was nothing that he could do about it. The desire was there, the need was there. We didn't know when the next time we would be together again and we wanted to make the most of our precious time. Sounds corny, but it was true. And I wanted him just as much then as I had when he first swept me into his arms.

````````

Ryan looked up from the journal and realized that he had no idea how much his simple words of desire had meant to her.

````````

I pulled off my sweater and climbed back onto the bed as he stepped out of his shorts and joined me. He removed my bra again along with the silky panties and they flew across the room landing by my suitcase.

He knelt on the bed and I pulled him up towards my head.

"Come here and let me suck on your cock."

He came closer and I reached out to stroke his semi-hard cock, feeling it stiffening in my hand.

"God I wish this headache would go away."

"Which one?"

He smiled devilishly down at me.

"We don't have to do this if you don't want to," I told him.

"Want is not the problem. There is more than enough desire for making love to you."

I flicked the tip of his cock with my tongue then swirled my tongue over the head, making it nice and wet to slip between my lips. He groaned then and leaned into me, sliding it into my mouth. I love that feeing. The hardness and softness combined with the friction of mouth on cock turned me on. I squirmed on the bed as he started to fuck my mouth in earnest.

"You like that?"

I moaned around his cock.

"Let me see?" He reached down to slide his fingers between my legs. "Oh, yes you do. You're nice and wet," he said as he started to finger me along with holding my head and continuing to fuck my face.

I can't believe how good he makes me feel.

````````````

Ryan closed the journal, smiling. God he loved her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tuesday's meeting met with just as much success as Monday's had. Though he had been busy rushing from meeting to meeting he still found at times he would be sitting there with a stupid smile on his face, remembering the journal that awaited him back a the hotel room, and thinking about what had transpired the night before.

One of his clients even commented that his new marriage was good for him. Maybe Ryan would be distracted enough to cut him a good deal. He had just smiled and shook his head, knowing he had been caught.

Back at his room that evening and fresh from the shower he called home once again.

"Hello?"

"Hi there," he said, settling back against the headboard.

"Hi. How was your day?" she asked.

"The same as yesterday, but with one noticeable difference."

"Oh? What was that?"

"I had this stupid grin plastered across my face all day. I probably heard six times that you must be good for me. Was I really that crabby before we were married?"

He heard her laughter tickle his ear. "No, I don't think so. Although, you usually do take your work seriously."

"Then maybe you're not so good for me," he teased. "How was your day?"

"I'm finally settling in. I worked on the office today. How do you expect me to get any work done if you're sitting at a desk only four feet away from me?"

"That's my whole plan. I distract you, you don't get your work done, and you lose your business and have no hope for income. Then you become my love slave; totally dependent on me."

"I'm already your love slave."

"Sometimes I think it's the other way around," he smiled.

"Just proves how good we are for each other," she said.

"I must be a glutton for punishment because I'm going to read more of the journal tonight."

"Really? How far are you into it?"

"We haven't even made it out of bed yet."

"That far huh? Must have been pretty boring reading since you didn't get very far," she hedged.

"Yes. That's it. There's all this sex stuff happening over and over again. What is the point of this story? Do these people ever do anything else?"

"I guess you'll have to keep reading and find out then."

"I guess I will have to." He paused. "Jessica, you know I'm teasing you."

"I know."

"I wish I wasn't here. I miss you. I wanted you for my wife so we wouldn't have to continue our relationship over the phone lines."

"I know."

"I've made a decision. No more road trips without you. It's killing me."

He heard her sigh on the other end. "I know it hasn't been easy, but I'll let you make this trip up to me when you get back."

"Will you?"

"Oh, I think so. Besides, after our kids are here we may not have the luxury of road trips with just the two of us."

"Yes there will be, even if I have to hire a nanny. I've waited all my life it seems to be with you and now that you're my wife I'm not letting you go. Besides, there are bound to be times when we'll both need a break from kids."

"So you plan on whisking me off to our own little room of childless paradise and then you'll leave me there while you head off to your meetings? Hmmm....that might not be so bad after all."

"You're too much. Okay, I'm off to read about this nympho couple and see what happens next. I can't wait."

"You mean you've forgotten?"

He smiled wistfully then. "How could I ever? Good night, Honey. I love you."

"I love you too."

Hanging up the phone he reached for the journal and pulled the slip of paper out that he had used to mark his page.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The soft breath that brushed across my shoulder reminded me that I was not alone.

Savoring the thought and keeping my eyes closed I took stock of body parts. One strong leg draped over mine and nudged against my pussy; the weight of his body pressed against my side. One protective arm wrapped around my waist, holding me close.

I smiled and carefully and minutely snuggled closer. I gently applied pressure with my hip, doing it in rhythm with my breathing. The arms that held me squeezed me slightly but his breathing remained steady.

I continued doing this as I could feel his cock that was lying against my hip start to stir. His breathing changed and he started to actually bump against me, gently humping my body.

"I like waking up next to you," he whispered into my ear. "Feel what you do to my body?"

"Yes," I answered and wiggled against him again.

His hand traced over my breasts, playing with the pliant flesh and circling closer until he brushed his palm against my nipple. I moaned, enjoying the sensations of his smooth flesh against my crinkled nipple.

I pressed my pussy against the thigh that was trapped between my own. I could feel the wetness from within me coat his skin, making the coarse hair on it slick and enhancing the friction between us.

By now my chest was heaving as we bumped and thrust together. His mouth made contact with one hardened nipple while his hand twisted the other between his fingers. Gently he suckled it then pinched it between his teeth. Not to hurt, but to cause the jolt of excitement that coursed right down through my body.

"Oh yeah, Baby. That feels great."

I gasped as he pinched the other nipple, causing the second jolt to pass through me. This one he physically felt as my body spasmed against his. He knew what he was doing. He had me pinned down and he was torturing me in such a way that my pleasure took over everything. All that remained was his body against mine, his cock against my hip, his thigh sliding up and down along my slit.

"Please Honey," I pleaded. "Please put your cock in me. Please fuck me. Please make love to me with that cock of yours." I said the words I knew he wanted to hear.

```````````

'My God, the woman is going to kill me.' Ryan's hand stroked his firmness continually through the passage of time he was reading. He knew he was building towards another climax, but he also knew what happened next and decided to share the present with the past.

```````````

He pushed his thigh tighter against me. "You think you want to come on my cock again?"

I shook my head in affirmation.

He moved over me but kept his leg in place, grinding it harder into my clit. The excitement was building higher. "You're sure you want me to move this leg?" He kissed along my collarbone and up the exposed cords of my neck to rest right at my ear. His cock pushed along my stomach. I could feel the stickiness of his wetness as he rubbed his cock head into me. "You don't know what you want. Keep doing what I'm doing or fuck you? What do you want?" He nipped at my earlobe. "What does my Baby really want?"

"Both," I smiled dreamily.

He chuckled then and I felt the vibrations in my own chest. "Then it shall be."

He ground his hip again into me, brushing his thigh along my clit. I wrapped my legs around his and rode. My hips rising to hump into his, forcing his thigh into just the right position for optimum stimulation. Again I didn't care what was going to happen. It was just he and I moving together to get me off. The whole point was to get me off. And I did.

It was such a thrill to know that this was just for me. All he cared about was having me pleased. He was such an attentive lover. He watched, listened, and learned. I have never had a lover like him. Even when I was married it was never like what we have together. He is my best friend, he is my lover, and I would do anything that he asked. I am such a slut for him, but I know he appreciates it. It's not a derogatory thing. It's a loving, giving thing.

After I had calmed down he asked, "How would you like me to fuck you Honey?"

I stroked his cock. "Actually, I want to fuck you."

"Oh?"

"Uh huh. Roll over." He moved to his back and I started my exploration. "Just lay back and enjoy me using your body."

"Mmmm, I like that."

I started by licking and kissing up his thighs, tasting every bit of him that I could reach. I brushed my hair over his cock as I kissed around the base and munched on the coarse hair that grew there. I gently sucked each of his balls into my mouth coating them with my saliva. Again I moved farther up his body, dragging his cock between my breasts. I picked them up and captured his cock between them, gently fucking him and licking his cock as it peeked through the flesh. I pinched my nipples between my fingertips as I did this they puckered and hardened at my touch.

As his breathing became more labored I stopped and moved on to teasing another part of his body. With my legs straddling his hips and his cock trapped between us I leaned forward without raising my hips and flicked first one of his nipples with my tongue, followed by the other. I brushed my own against his skin as I bent forward to taste first his neck, earlobe, and then trailed to his lips. Again I teased, darting my tongue into his while my hands again played with his nipples. His pecks were firm under my caress.

His hands traveled down my body and rested on my hips. He ground his cock into me. I loved the pressure building. Finally I raised my hips and lined up his cock with my pussy. Slowly I started to move down on it, letting it fill my insides. Dipping my hips against his I worked his cock with just the right rhythm. Despite the fact that I had come a short time ago, I knew I was going to come again. It just felt too damn good.

``````````````

Ryan lay on the bed, eyes closed. The past mixing with the present, his mind's eye envisioned her positioned above him. Her hands braced on his chest as she rocked back and forth against him. Her mouth was slightly open and her lips pink and swollen from kissing him. Her eyes were closed in concentration while her lashes fanned across her cheeks. He would always remember the way she looked that day.

He had reached up then and captured her breasts in his hands. He knew she thought they were saggy, but he thought they were perfect. That was when she looked down at him with her big blue eyes and he fell in love all over again.

"I love you," he had whispered.

She had smiled then, stopped her movements and answered him back. "I love you too." She leaned forward and kissed him as his hands wrapped around her waist. She'd kissed him with all the passion her love had held and her body joined in on that love. He'd let her play with his body, but he wanted to love her then. He wanted her to feel his love pumping into her, so he moved her hips and plunged his cock deep inside of her. He heard her sharp intake of breath, along with the whispered, "Yes" just before their bodies started to move as one.

Ryan stroked himself with more pressure and imagined the way her cunt had gripped him when she finally came again, and this time, alone in his motel room, he joined her in her release.

~~~~~~~~~~~

The cool air dancing across his body woke him. He reached for Jessica to warm him, and only found empty sheets. Opening his eyes then, he realized he had fallen asleep reading that damn journal. He reached over and snapped off the light and stared at the ceiling in the dark.

Why did he just think of it that way? He considered his motives for a moment and realized why. Because it reminded him about just how lonely he was. She should be there with him, filling his arms the way she filled his heart.

Three years. Why had he wasted three years worth of time that they could have been together totally?

Yes, it was true that at the time they had met he was married, but it had been a loveless marriage for a long time. When he met Jessica he knew in a short time that he truly loved her, but he'd said he wanted to do it right. He didn't want to hurt his wife or his children by filing for divorce, but he wasn't happy. He needed his wife to understand that there was nothing left for them, and he wanted his children to continue to love him, not blame him. So he had taken his time with Jessica in the wings occupying a great part of his world, yet because of the physical distance between them, she didn't complicated his everyday life.

Three years. She could have been my wife for at least two years by now. Restlessly he rolled over and punched his pillow into compliance. Now he couldn't sleep. He looked at the clock. 2AM. Frustrated, he reached for the phone.

"Hello?" Her voice was raspy with sleep.

"Hi."

"Hi. What's the matter?"

"I couldn't sleep."

"So you thought if you couldn't sleep, I shouldn't either?" She followed that with a yawn.

"We agreed to share everything," he teased.

Chuckling, she answered, "Yes we did. For a minute there when I heard the phone ring I was confused. I was thinking you were playing music and were calling me on your way home."

He was silent for a minute.

"You still there?"

"Yes," he answered.

"What's the matter?"

"Jessica, I owe you an apology."

"For what?"

"I should have married you a long time ago."

"What? Where did that come from?"

"I don't know. I was just thinking about it."

"Ryan, you did things the way you thought best."

"I know, but now I'm not too sure."

"It's in the past, Honey. We're together now and that's all that matters."

"I know, but I'm still sorry. You deserved so much more, and I took you for granted while you waited around for me to get my act together."

"And it was worth it. Besides, you have the rest of our lives to make it up to me."

"I will, I promise."

"You already promised that on our wedding day. Now go to sleep. You'll be home tonight, right?"

"Yes, just as soon as I can."

"Sleep well, love."

"You too. Good night." He rolled over and hung up the phone and thought, 'She's too good to me.' In the reflection of the clock he saw the journal. Flipping on the light he picked it up again.

```````````````

Seven hours after our first touch, we finally made it out of the room. Since he grew up in the area he gave me a quick tour, pointing out different sites and telling me memories of things that had happened to him here and there. I loved it. This was a part of him that I enjoyed hearing about, past loves, fights, music and family.

Eventually we reached our destination. The casino boat was docked, so we went to the bar for a bite to eat before departure. Moving into the casino he took my hand. There were tons of people, and standing a good foot above me, he easily guided us through the throng. I had never played roulette before, so I stood by and watched as he doubled his money.

Then he again placed my hand in his and we headed to the slot machines. We were off to make a fortune. Unfortunately, it didn't work, but we did enjoy each other's company while we fed the machines.

At one point near the end of our playing time we were sitting side by side sharing one machine and I slid my hand up and down his thigh, eventually nudging it directly between them. I smiled at him and kissed him then. Something about the fact that there were people all around us, not to mention the surveillance cameras excited me. When he finally asked if I was ready to go back I enthusiastically told him yes. We played out our money and headed for the door.

Back at the room, I started to undress while he slipped the 'Do Not Disturb' sign on the door. I was down to my panties when I felt him behind me. He wrapped his arms around me and I circled in his arms.

"Are you feeling better?" I asked.

"The food helped, but I still have a slight headache," he said as he nudged himself against me.

Now was my chance to undress him. I pulled his shirt free from his jeans and towed it over his head. Then, placing kisses all over his chest I worked my way down. Following the darkened trail of hair that disappeared below his waistband, I knelt. I noticed I was right in front of a full-length mirror and knew he would be able to watch me do this to him from two different angles.

I opened the button and slowly took down the zipper. Then, pausing to remove shoes and socks, slid the jeans down the length of his long, powerful legs. I placed kisses and licks along the length of them, all the while avoiding touching his cock, which was by then straining against the front of his underwear.

I ran my fingers around the elastic waistband, teasing him as I did this. That's when I looked up. The look I saw in his eyes made my breath catch. It was such a mixture of lust and love that I would have done anything to please him.

So, being in the position that I was, I removed his underwear and took him into my mouth. I licked just the tip and wet both him and my lips, and looking back into those eyes, took the length of him down my throat. Then, I let him make love to me.

He cupped my head in his hands so lovingly and slid that cock in and out between my lips. It was the most effortless blowjob I've ever given. I was there for him to take his pleasure in, and it was such a turn-on doing it for him.

He watched in the mirror as I slipped one hand between my own legs and started to play with myself. The minute I did this though he groaned so loudly that I thought he was going to come. He entwined his fingers in my hair and held me firmly on his cock. After a few moments of agonizing non-movement, he slowly pulled himself out of my mouth. He helped me to my feet, removed my panties and ordered me to bed. I crawled into the king-sized bed.

What he asked for then, surprised me.

"Honey, will you play with yourself for me?"

I couldn't help but to tease. "No." I wanted to hear the desire in his voice as he asked me again.

"Please, Honey? Please play with yourself the way you do it when we're on the phone? I'll be right here by your side and in your ear like always."

I smiled then. "Are you sure that's what you want?"

He guided my hand again to his cock. It was rock hard under my touch and the tip was leaking moisture. "What do you think?"

I turned then and kissed him soundly on the lips and he placed one arm under my neck and pulled me close along the length of his body. Then, breaking the kiss I relaxed into his body and let him talk to me, his lips mere centimeters from my ear.

With my left hand I played with the nipple on my left breast. My right hand trailed down my stomach and between my legs. He hooked one leg over mine and pulled it to him. I honestly don't remember the little fantasy that he told me that night. Something about some day me playing with myself in front of somebody else while he told me just how sexy I was. All I knew was that at the time it was such a turn on having him whisper in my ear, as he had done so many times before on the phone. Knowing he was watching just what I did with my fingers, watching the reaction of my body, told me this was being etched into his memory. From this time on, when we had our sexy conversations he would know exactly what I was doing to my body to get myself off.

"Come on, Baby. Come for me. Just like on the phone." Within minutes I was at the edge of my orgasm and he continued to urge me on.

I opened my eyes then to see the wonder on his face as I pushed myself over that erotic edge and brought myself off before him.

"That was incredible, Baby," he whispered in my ear. Then he placed a tender kiss upon each eye and I fell briefly into sleep.

When his arm had fallen asleep, he had tried to remove it without waking me, but I roused myself, knowing I didn't want to waste our time together by sleeping through it.

It was at that time that my stomach made a nasty growl and we laughed together. I asked him then if he was hungry and he admitted he was a bit. I told him that in my car I had a small cooler and he quickly dressed and stepped out to retrieve it. When he returned I lay on the bed and watched as he prepared a snack. It wasn't much, but I knew it would give us at least a little nourishment.

He sliced the cheese, opened the crackers, plucked the grapes and mixed orange juice with the wine coolers for a makeshift Mimosa.

Lounging on the bed we snacked and talked about the music gig he had played the night before. We talked about a couple of books he had recently purchased and had brought along to show me. I reclined on the bed as he took one out and we flipped through the pages while he pointed out parts that interested him.

I did try very hard to stay awake. He was so excited to share this with me, but I just couldn't control my body's desire for sleep.

Thankfully, he recognized the fact that I had no choice but to sleep and advised me to give into it. I snuggled into the blankets and pillows and opened my eyes periodically to gaze upon his face as he munched on crackers absent mindedly, concentrating on the book.

Eventually he also was over come by the efforts of our day together and he placed the snacks and book on the table beside him, gathered me into his arms, and held me close. I remember one last look at the clock - 4 AM.

It was 9:00 before we woke wrapped in each other's arms. The reality of the fact that today we would part hung in the air, yet neither of us mentioned it.

We kissed and cuddled, and whispered words to each other until we made slow, passionate love. As he lay between my thighs, stroking his cock in and out of my pussy, our emotions were raw and we both came while holding on desperately to each other.

Slowly the lethargy caused by my confused emotions seeped in and I felt like I couldn't move. I didn't want to move because if I took that next step it meant we were getting closer to our time of parting. We had just made love for the last time and had no idea if it would ever happen again. Ryan kissed me gently and told me to rest while he went to take a shower.

He knew. He knew me too well. With the water running the in background I cried softly into my pillow. How I thought we could spend this beautiful time together and then just walk away, was beyond me.

I pulled myself together, determined that he wouldn't see me cry. I had to be stronger. This had to be just sex between two consenting adults. Make it playful and I could get through it, I told myself.

As I heard him step out of the shower I flipped back the covers and boldly walked naked over to him. Staying behind him so he wouldn't see my red, swollen eyes I playfully kissed his back and stroked my hands over his body.

"Did you leave me any hot water?"

"I hope so. Keep that up and you won't make it to the shower," he warned.

I chuckled behind him. "What time do we have to be out of the room?"

"Eleven, but I'll call the front desk and get and extension for an hour if I can."

"Okay." I ducked my head and my hair fell forward to cover my face. I patted him on his ass as I moved to the bathroom. Turning on the cool water I let it fall against my face. It was a jolt, but a well needed one. As I continued to wash I warmed the water and through the open door we talked and teased each other.

"You know, you could come in here and help me," I told him.

"You should have said something earlier, but I doubt they would have let us delay our check out time until three," he teased.

When I turned off the water, he met me with a towel to wrap around myself. He was already dressed. I shook my head, sending droplets of water flying in all directions and sprinkling his shirt.

"Get dressed. I want to play something for you, but if I do it while you're naked you'll distract me." He smiled down at me and placed a quick kiss upon my lips.

As I picked out my clothes I watched him in the mirror bring his guitar to the bed. It was a beautiful combination of metal and wood and I watched as he place the finger picks on his fingers and started to pluck the strings and check the tune. The rich notes filled the room.

I quickly dressed, combed my hair and reclined on the bed next to him.

"What's that you're playing?"

"Just some warm ups to get the flexibility back into my fingers."

"I think your fingers are quite flexible the way they are."

He smiled back at me. "I know you do, but I want to get this right." Then he turned serious. "I've never written a song before. Never had the desire to. But one night when we were talking with me playing in the background, I came upon a melody. Pardon the pun, but it just struck a chord, so I wrote this for you. Its called 'Jessica Lynn'."

I couldn't help it, but my eyes began to tear before he even played a note. I blinked rapidly so I could watch him through clear eyes as he played.

There was concentration on his face as he started to play, but the more he played the more he relaxed and seemed to go to another world. The song was beautiful. A mixture of playful and soulful notes floated through the air. He played them over and over again until the last note echoed through my ears. I was so lost in the music I didn't realize that he had been watching me, expectantly. The smile that crossed my fact told him what he needed to know, but I said the words anyway.

"Honey, that was wonderful, and I feel so special that you wrote that just for me. It's beautiful." Again I had to blink rapidly and he recognized my maneuver.

"You don't have to cry over it," he smiled.

"I can't help it. I never had anyone write a song for me before. I love it. Too bad I didn't bring a tape recorder along so I could take it home with me."

That is when he smiled sheepishly, reached into the case and handed me a tape. "I had hoped you would like it so I made a tape of it at home."

I sat up and kissed him then. "The way I enjoy your playing for me over the phone, you should have known I would love it."

"Yes, I should have. It's just that I've never done anything like that before and...." He stopped right there, unable to admit his vulnerability.

I kissed him again. "I love it, and I love you. Play it again for me, then we better get going."

We packed our things in almost complete silence, yet the silence wasn't uncomfortable, then loaded the vehicles and went for breakfast, even though it was afternoon. After some shopping and a little more touring we resigned ourselves to the fact that we had to head for our homes.

We sat in the parking lot of the hotel in silence. This one laced with sadness. He held my hand and relaxed against the seat.

"Don't be sad, Honey. It just makes this harder on us and I would like to be able to do this again. If you're going to be sad when we part each time, I don't think I can handle it."

I kissed his fingers then. "I'm not sad," I somewhat lied. "I'm very happy matter of fact. I'm so glad we finally got to be together. Most people who meet like we did never get that opportunity."

He reached over and stroked my hair then. "Good. We better get moving. You have a long drive ahead of you."

I transferred to my car and he came to reassure himself I was wearing my seat belt. With one last warning to be careful on the drive home, he kissed me, told me he loved me, and shut the door.

It took everything in me to watch him pull away and into traffic. I just wanted to sit right there and bawl, but it wouldn't have done me any good, so I put the car in drive and headed toward home.

Half an hour later as 'Jessica Lynn' played in the background, I maneuvered through traffic. While I mechanically jockeyed from lane to lane the ring of my cell phone broke through to me.

It could only be him.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hi there. Well, how far are you?"

"We only left half an hour ago. I'm on the toll road. I missed my exit, so I decided to take the route I knew. Do you miss me already?" I asked.

"That's why I called."

I smiled to myself. "Honey, I'm sorry for my mood just before we left, but I couldn't help it. I didn't lie though. I was happy at the same time."

"I know. Next time hopefully it won't be so hard."

My heart gave a special little flip at the mention of there being a next time. "I look forward to it."

"I'm going to get going, but I just wanted you to know you were on my mind. No matter what I'm doing your always there. I'll call you tonight, okay?"

"All right. I'll be home by 7, but probably not back to the house until about 9. I have a couple of stops when I get back," I told him.

"Sounds good. I'll talk to you then love."

"I love you too."

I hung up then, and drove the remainder of the way home with a slightly happier heart. At least until I reached home, drove directly to my sister-in-law's house and cried my eyes out.

It was such a beautiful, wonderful, emotion filled weekend. I do hope we can do this again soon. Hopefully, I'll be better equipped to handle the emotional side of things.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

May 28

This has been a strange turn of events. Ryan and I were together for a total of two days and one night, and the ramifications of those days were felt today. This seemed like the best place to write down my thoughts, as this is the only place it will be noted and probably won't be brought up again. There is nobody else besides Ryan who will ever know about this.

I had gone on the pill before we were together, and it appears that we were one of the 'unlucky' ones where it didn't work. And yet, fate seemed to know it wasn't the right time for us. Today, even though I didn't realize I was pregnant, I had a miscarriage. I sat in stunned silence staring at my computer screen. I couldn't even call Ryan and tell him. He had to find out over the cold lines of the Internet.

To say he was surprised was an understatement, but he was very understanding and concerned. I knew there was no way he could be with me. But all I really wanted was for him to be there to hold me. There was nothing else that could be done.

I'm having very mixed feelings about this. I feel somewhat cheated that I didn't get to even enjoy the feelings of knowing that I was pregnant with Ryan's child. Though I would have been more confused and it really would have changed my life, I would have loved that child totally. Now, even that has been taken away.

At this point I don't know when Ryan and I will be able to see each other again. While I do love him, I know he has to go through a lot in his life in order to make time for us to meet, not even considering having a normal relationship. I will be here for as long as he wants me, but I realize that life changes and our lives could go separate ways. That is why I am thankful that I took the time to write this journal. Someday, I may look back at this journal and it may be the only reminder of the time we had together, of how much I loved him, and I may be saddened that things didn't develop between us. Or, I could be reminded of the happy times that started this forever-lasting relationship. Either way, it has been very special, and I wouldn't have changed it for anything.

``````````````````

Ryan closed the journal and set it aside. She had warned him that the journal included more than just sex, but he'd had no idea that her emotional thoughts would be so clear and that they would have such an effect on him.

He sniffed involuntarily and realized he had been crying. Burying his face in his hands he let loose and cried for the time they had lost together, cried for the child they would never know, cried because he was thankful that her love had been strong enough to last and that she was now his.

The buzz of the alarm clock startled him out of his emotional outburst. Slamming the snooze button he glared at the clock. He wiped his eyes, turned off the alarm, and headed for the shower.

While he waited for the water to warm he studied his reflection in the mirror. Had he done the right thing by marrying Jessica? When he finally decided to ask her, it just seemed like the right time. His divorce was done, the house was build, all his ducks seemed to be in a row. She had deserved so much more, but still she had been there for him. He loved her so much. He shook his head and stepped under the water.

He finished his shower and stepped out, toweling dry his hair. That's when he noticed the message light blinking on the phone. He picked up the receiver and dialed in the retrieve number.

"Hi Honey. I was thinking about your phone call last night, and I just wanted to tell you that I love you. I don't care what happened in the past or what all happened to bring us together. All that matters is that we are together now and will be together for the rest of our lives. That's an awful long time, but I think we're up to the challenge. Honey, I love you. I wouldn't change that for anything. Bye, Love."

Ryan shook his head, smiled, and returned the phone to its cradle. She knew him too well. Across the room he saw his brief case and knew what he had to do. Grabbing his planner he reached for the phone.

~~~~~~~~~~

Jessica sat on the grass, knees pulled to her chest as she stared absentmindedly at the burning boxes.

She hoped Ryan's meetings today went well. Something in his phone call last night had bothered her and had prompted her phone call that morning. She hoped he had gotten her message.

She rested her forehead on her knees. She never should have given him that journal.

Suddenly, arms wrapped around her as someone sat down behind her. "Is this seat taken?" Ryan's voice reached her ears.

"Ryan!" She turned then and threw her arms around him. "What are you doing home already? I thought you wouldn't be home until late?"

"Well, it seems that all my appointments were cancelled unexpectedly."

"Really? What happened?" she asked, her forehead furrowing in concern.

"Yes. When I explained to them that I had an emergency at home they were more than happy to reschedule. Especially since I offered them an additional discount if they could."

"You didn't? Why?"

"Because we're on our honeymoon. My reason for not moving swiftly towards my divorce was because I wanted to do things right. Now, I want to do things right again. Jessica, it's our honeymoon and we belong together."

"Oh, Ryan, I do love you."

He pulled her against him and kissed her then, right there on the grass in the back yard.

They were together, and would always be together. It was meant to be, and they wouldn't have changed a thing.

THE END

Thank you for reading my story. Please take a few moments to send any comments you may have about the story. Your comments are completely anonymous, unless you choose to include your email address. If you include your email address, I'll send you a personal reply as soon as I can. Your input will help me continue to write the type of stories you want. Thanks!

If you enjoyed my story, please take the time to drop me a line at katierose99@hotmail.com. I appreciate any feedback that I receive - good and bad. I'll answer all mail as early as possible. Thank you for your consideration - katie rose

good_as_it_gets