I will keep this page updated with comments on what I publish
and how I feel about it. In the first couple of stories I
included that in the beginning of the story, but that makes it
confusing to the story, so I guess it is better to keep the
comments outside the story. For general questions about the stories or me, see
the FAQ section.
I know I should be working on the continuation of the Caste Showdown, but it is slow going.
Some months ago I went to visit a friend in prison. Not a nice experience, but it had my imagination going full speed, and it ended up with this new story. Hope you enjoy it.
6-mar-07 - Comments after publishing Castle Showdown
I have had many nice mails commenting on the story. One of them I would like to elaborate on as it triggered an interesting point of view. The reader commented that "he knew it was just a fantasy, but...".
Fantasies are "real" in that they describe "real" feelings in the mind of the writer. Had I been a fiction writer, writing a crimi novel, that probably would not reveal very much about the "real" pictures and dreams that appear in my mind. Sharing a fantasy is therefor a very "real" and intimate experience. I would feel very uncomfortable letting anybody who knows me, know what kind of fantasies I really have. I my daily life I battle with desires that I cannot really get satisfaction for, but I can enter a fantasy world, dream about what I would wish to happen and afterwards write about it. Letting people know how much it excites me to knowingly let a dres fall open enough for my breasts to be visible, how hot that gets me in the situation, is for me very intimate and satisfying. Not even my husband knows what that really does for me. When it happens he thinks I do it for him because he likes me to do it. The stories I write may be fantasies, but my intimate desires are not. Sharing those with my readers is what makes the writing so rewarding.
1-mar-07 - For your inspiration
I thought I would include this picture for your inspiration regarding the bikini described in the story Castle Showdown.
Well, I am back again - at least for one more story. I have enjoyed writing this story. It became a lot longer than I had anticipated, and there is even going to be a continuation. The castle is faboulous, even if castle perhaps is a wrong word, as it is more like a baroque chateau. We did indeed go to a castle very similar to what I have described. I did wear a very small bikini and did enjoy people looking at me, and didn't really do anything to prevent people at the beach looking at me, but even though I got terribly aroused, I didn't dare do what I fantasised doing at the beach. Unfortunately there was no ride in a horse carriage, but I have previously been on a ride in such a horse carriage, where we did get a chance to get rather intimate, so it was fun bringing that into the story and tie it together.
I did go to the dinner in the dress as I described it, and did indeed remove my underwear towards the end of the dinner. That was actually rather daring and I would like to belive that some people had a glimpse of my breasts as I sat at the table, and later got up for our walk in the woods, but I can't be sure. We did find a nice place in woods for some action, and later went up to the castle tower. We stripped and went to the top, but neither of us had the nerve to go outside in the spotlight so the action took place at the bottom of the last set of stairs leading to the very top of the tower. I am sorry to say there is no Jerry, but I do belive they have some kind of a club, but I don't know if it is a swinging club, because we saw a number of people arriving at the caste, but never going any further than a door at the side of the entry gate. We tried to see what was behind the door, but for us it was closed and we never investigated further. We just had a bit of a laugh imagining it to be a swining club.
As for my personal life - it seems a bit more controlled these days, but since I don't have very much time away from home, writing means taking time away from other tasks, which I really should have prioritized higher. Not good for the conscience, I am afraid. However, I am going to continue to be prioritizing "wrong" at least until I am finished with the continuation.
28-jun-05 - Just a comment
I am sorry to say that I have stopped writing for the time being. It is years since I managed to finish a story. My job has evolved to where I don't have the time I used to have. I don't have night shifts any more. Thank God for that. I also don't travel all that much, which is good for the kids. I still have a lot of dirty dreams, sex life is fine, but in a firm framework with not so much experimentation any more. I do hope however, that I can return to writing one day as it was a great kick. I will stay on-line and read my mail occationally, but don't expect instant replies. Note my new e-mail account listed on the front page. I got tired of Hotmail which kept filling up with spam, and closing when I didn't check the mail often enough.
I know that I haven't been writing for a while, but our Wedding Anniversary trip to Bakken this year was quite exciting and what actually did happen sparked my imagination for this story. My clothes were as described in the story, only maybe not quite as revealing, but certainly enough for our guest Greg to be very interested in me. Nice – he is a really sexy person and the feeling of being with him all evening, being totally naked under my clothes, just had me so excited the whole time. I did go on the ride with both Poul and Greg, but even though Poul really did have my jacket as open as I described during the ride, I had managed to be quite decent when I got out again. On the trip with Greg, I did indeed feel his dick go hard and even though his hands didn't get as far as my breasts they were holding on to the bare part of my sides. I think he did have a good view of my breasts as we ate, but nothing more really happened until he left around closing time. Poul and I continued into the forest as we usually do, we found a secluded place, but still within view of Bakken for some much needed and very good sex. All in all a very nice evening, so why does my imagination play with it and make it into such an orgy? I don't know. Playing with my limitations, secret desires, frustrations? Maybe all of that.
8-jul-02 - Just an update on my status
I'm sorry to say I am not producing any stories for the time being. My husbond Poul has started his own clinique. That created quite a stir at the hospital, and I was just about to get fired, because they thought I would have a conflict of interests. Meanwhile the clinique is taking more effort and time to get to produce the results we had hoped. I am using all my spare time helping Poul. At the same time I don't get to travel so much. My recent Ph.D. has given me more administrative work (you study to become a better doctor and you end up with paperwork!) and I don't travel so much any more. Right now I have three weeks off the hospital, but have to help Poul in stead, so that means no holiday to get into the romantic mood needed for inspiration. Ouch - not funny. But don't give up - I will be back as soon as the work eases up a bit.
14-jan-2002 - no story
Sorry to say there is no story in the pipeline. However, Teddy did a picture
for the "Early morning run" which I have linked to from the front page
together with the link to the story. We did however have a very nice New Year's
evening party, which might prompt the next story. It is slowly brewing.
I recently went to a NLP course. I learned a lot about how people perceive
things differently. Some see pictures in their mind, some hear things and other
feel their experiences. If you want to reach a wider audience you have to appeal
to the senses used by all of your audience, not just the ones you use yourself.
I wanted to try to write a story using that knowledge. I took this experience,
which is an elaboration on a real situation where I met a guy when I was running,
and was in doubt if he had managed to watch me when having my usual nude swim
after the run. I have often thought what would have happened if he did and I had
dared to play with myself when drying in the sun. If you are a regular reader
and the emphasis on sound and feeling have made a difference for you I wouldn't
mind a note to that effect, so I can see if it is the way I should try to write
in the future.
Finally a new story. Did you think I had retired? I almost did myself. We
have had a bit of trouble. My husbond Poul has started a private practise of his
own in competition with his old private hospital, where I still work. Of course
we knew it might create some problems, but not to the extent that the hospital
also wanted to kick me out. After some tough months with lawyers, contracts etc.
it has now been resolved. I am still at the hospital, but with a contract which
will bring all kind of damnation over me if I ever go and work for Poul or
direct patients to his practise. But we can live with that. I have no intention
of working with him, and our fields are so different that my patients would have
no need to go to him. Anyway - troubles like that makes it difficult to find
time to write.
I have worked on this story for months. At one point I thought I would never
get it finished. But here it is. It is a combination of a couple of real
situations. I did spend time with two friends at the site where the story takes
place, but the inclusion of the video idea comes from a different experience
with a much closer friend (otherwise I would never have let him video us) and
only the two of us.If you haven't already tried, you should try to video your
own sex scenes. It is such a revealing experience.
This is just a small story elaborating on an experience from our summer
vacation. I don't think I will publish it yet. It doesn't really count as a full
story, and I would just get all kinds a critique saying it doesn't have any
dialog, no plot etc. However, I think my regular readers would appreciate it, so
here it is.
05-jul-2001 - I am slowly returning to writing now.
Yes - I have been away for way too long. Some of you may know that I now have
a doctorate. I got a grant some time back to persue an interesting line in my
profession, which I needed to finish my PhD (doctorate). I have spent most of
the spring researching, writing and preparing for my dissertation. That being
over I am dying to get back to writing, but it is difficult. I am not back on
night duty (and may not if my new title brings about the expected promotion) and
I am not at present travelling. Both were main sources of time for writing. Also
it is summer, kids are home, Poul is home more than usual etc. etc. I have a few
stories half finished, but can't seem to get to fired up enough to finish them.
BUT, I am back - I have not disappeared into writers oblivion. Hang on - as soon
as I get time I am back to writing.
New publishing principle
This marks the beginning of a new posting principle. I will no longer
put the reasons for writing the story, nor the the usual comment about how I
feel for the story in the beginning. I will place these comments here in the
publishing diary. Many readers have commented that it ruins a good story to be
told in the beginning that it isn't true. I can understand that. However,
another part of my readers have commented that it is these notes which makes
reading the story an intimate experience. I need to explain why I write as the
writing is part of a journey inside myself, exploring my own limits. Many of the
comments from readers which I appreciate the most, comment on my experiences of
writing these stories, rather than the stories themselves. I have also decided
to put more comments into this page, and not only write when I have a story
ready. This could be small happening which have excited me, or some ideas of
stories which I am working on. Consider it not only a publishing diary, but a
diary related to my writing.
06-apr-2001 - Just a comment in between stories.
I am not actively working on any stories with now. However I am reviewing
some of the unfinished stories to see if I can revive my interest in them and
get them finished off. In the meantime my readers my enjoy the following insert
which is part of a communication with a reader asking more details about my
exhibitionistic tendencies.
I
don’t think I do it deliberately to shock people. I think it is solely (at
least of the suggested reasons you have come up with – there might be other
subtle reasons) the thought of what is does to guys watching. To give you a
couple of examples. Once in my teens when visiting a beach where people
usually would lie naked in the dunes some of the other girls talked about some
“dirty old man” going around watching the girls in the dunes and some of
them had heard that he was seen masturbating behind the bushes while watching
the girls. They we all disgusted by the thought. But I was getting excited! I
found myself wishing he would come and watch me and what I would do if he came
– like pretending not to have seen him, but lying in a very revealing
position etc. I found it a challenge to make him more excited by watching me
than the other he had watched. The thought of how he was actually stroking
himself while watching me I found highly arousing, and was rather disappointed
that I never saw him! Another time when I was no more than maybe 18 I went to
a graduation party with a boyfriend I had at the time. When it started to get
light in the morning about 4am we went for a walk in a nearby forest. The
sun’s rays were shining through the branches making light streaks through
the morning mist. We stood on a slope facing a small lake. An early morning
jogger and his dog ran along a path at the edge of the lake waving to us. When
he was out of sight my boyfriend who stood behind me pulled my t-shirt over my
head and started playing with my breast. It was thrilling standing half naked
like that with the rays of the sun lighting up your body. However, it only
started getting really exciting for me when I realised the jogger’s dog was
milling around at the lake and at a nearby thickening of the trees. I hadn’t
intended to let my boyfriend get any further than just the top and a bit of
fondling of my breasts, but I got so excited about the thought that the jogger
was hiding behind the trees watching me, that we went the whole way. The dog
was at the edge of the lake all the time, and I was sure the guy was down
there jerking off in his tracksuit watching me. I played that scene over so
many times in my dreams over the future months trying to imagine what the view
had been from the trees, what the guy had been doing and what was going
through his head at the time. I also went through a phase feeling guilty of
the fact that I got excited like that from letting a guy watch me. I still do
some times even today. But then I tell myself that people have all kinds of
much more disturbing tendencies, and that mine is very harmless and doesn’t
hurt anybody – rather the opposite actually. So why not?
Writing
these stories is just an extension of that. I probably could write stories,
which weren’t personal, and in which the main character was another person,
but that wouldn’t do anything for me. It is the thought that my readers have
got to know me as a certain kind of character (slightly exaggerated – but
still basically me and my dreams) that I find so exciting. The things I can do
and write about are things I couldn’t even discuss with Poul. Here I really
get a chance to try to imagine the darker side of me. Playing with those
thoughts and even writing about them, knowing the readers get aroused from my
thoughts are almost as good as exposing myself in the woods an early morning.
This story has a great deal of truth in it. We did go to the place for the
purpose stated. The sun-bed scenes did happen, but not as explicit as I have
written. We did meet Ernst and his wife. We did go to the party, but I didn't
need the tape that I have added to the story so that it could be removed to
expose my breasts. The grass was so heavy and dense that my breasts couldn't
show through unless I deliberately separated the grass. The German guy who sat
across from me was true enough and he did stare at me quite a lot, but
unfortunately the table wasn't transparent, so even when Poul did have his hand
all the way between my legs he didn't know. I danced with Ernst who was getting
rather personal and tried to touch me through the grass, but I didn't let him,
because it was both rather visible on the dance floor, and because that didn't
really fit with the agreement I have with Poul that if anybody is going to touch
me, he has to be along. We also did have sex behind the boulders, but not as
conspicuously as described. I was, however, aware that we were possibly visible
from the balconies, which was rather a turn on for me, but unfortunately there
was nobody in sight at any point!
The story has been quite difficult to write because it is so close to the
truth. In fantasies I can do anything, but here I occasionally felt rather silly
with what we had actually done. That made it difficult to get into the right
mood for writing. It has been shelved for a long time, and only now after almost
a year, have I felt I could finish it.
19-mar-2001 - Status.
Today there is a snowstorm in the Southern Denmark. I was supposed to go
there, but due to the weather I have decided to stay home. So maybe it is time
to do something to stay in touch with my readers?
I am working on a story, but it develops very slowly. It is based upon a true
experience last Easter now almost a year ago. I have been trying to write a
story around it ever since. But it is always a strange experience writing about
something, which has happened. When it is a fantasy the thought of it keeps me
excited and makes me want to keep writing as the story develops in my head. But
when I try to write about something which has happened, I almost feel silly when
I think back on what I did, and it is much more difficult to write it. However,
I managed a few more pages today, so sometime Real Soon Now it should be
finished.
I have had a couple of e-mail dialogues (if you can call it that when it is
on e-mail) on some of my pet subjects. As my faithful readers will know I am
fascinated by the thought of why men wants their wives to have sex with other
men, participating or not participating. I have received some mails from guys
trying to tell me why they feel like that, and I have had some mails from guys
who have tried it and warn me against it. I find the thought so fascinating,
that I am almost willing to try it for Poul's sake, just to be able to discuss
the experience with him. However, all the warnings have had an impact on me. It
is especially the irreversibility (is there such a word?) of the action, which
scares me. Right now any real action in this regard is shelved, by as soon as I
get time to write more again, I think I would like to explore my own feelings on
the subject by trying to write another story about it. When I wrote "one
for the husband" it was mostly for the excitement of writing the story, not
so much thinking about the background.
The other mails have been about exhibitionism. Some readers seem to be
fascinated by my exhibitionistic streak, even though they admit they couldn’t
get themselves to do it. I think there are two things which have to be fulfilled
before you can become an exhibitionist. The first is that the thought itself has to
be exciting for you. I don't know if everybody has a desire to show off
themselves, knowing that others gets excited from watching them. I know lots of
girls feel like this to some extend. But does everybody have the desire, but
manage to hide it from themselves? I think you have to experiment to find out.
The second thing is the fear of being recognised and labelled as cheap or weird.
I overcome this in two ways. One is making sure you do whatever you do in a
place far enough away from home that nobody knows you. The other one is to do
whatever you do in such a way that it will appear that the one watching is the
one at fault (if anybody has to be faulted). To be on the safe side I always
make sure that what I do will appear to be something where I haven’t thought
of the fact that others might be watching. That will hopefully save me one day
if it turns out that I wasn’t far enough away from home to not be recognised
anyway. But there is also a third possibility. You could do it in an atmosphere
or at a site where it was acceptable. There are different sex clubs, or even
vacation sites, where it is ok to explore you sexuality. I have always wanted to
go one of these places, but have never got around to it. My friend Teddy from
Aarhus in Denmark once directed me to a site (www.voyeurweb.com).
I saw a video from a party where a girl danced with a dress so short you could
see half her bum. Some stills showed what I believe to be the same girl half
naked in a chair while both a guy and a girl play with her. The thought of being
in a situation where such behaviour in front of others would be acceptable is
very exciting to me. Click the thumbnail below for a larger version of the picture I
am talking about if you are interested.
The last thing to do today is to direct you a discussion about dicks which I
have had with Teddy. There is a link to it from the main page on this site or
you can click here.
28-feb-2001 - no story.
Some time ago I was given a grant to continue studying and researching.
Eventually this will hopefully lead to a Ph.D. I am now at the stage where I
collect and analyse data I receive from other hospitals all over the world using
the same techniques as I do. That is taking so much of my time that I cannot fit
in any writing of erotica for the time being. I have a few unfinished stories I
will try to finish when I have the time and inclination (difficult to find as
well when you work so hard), but I can't promise when. Also, the reason they
aren't finished is that I wasn't so pleased with the way they were developing.
But maybe some readers will find them reasonaly readable anyway.
So, I am sorry. Not a lot of new stuff about to come out right now. But stay
tuned, I haven't given up.
During a recent
discussion regarding men offering their wives to other men, I have mentioned
toyou about a time when Poul (my
husband) and I shared a room with a friend, and where Poul wanted me naked in
the bed between him and our friend.As
I explained at the time, nothing happened, but welater discussed what might have happened if I had accepted Poul's wish.I spent some time thinking it through, and decided that if the situation
were to arise today, I would accept it and see what would transpire.As I cannot change the past in reality, I have decided to write a story
about what might have happened.The
setting and everything leading up to the bed scene is based upon what really
occurred that night, except that I probably wasn't quite as provocative on the
beach as I now wish I had been.
In this story I end up having sex with three teenage boys of "other
ethinc origin". My comments regarding such a situation I have inserted in
the beginning of the story. I need however to make my readers aware that
situations regarding second-generation refugees as they are referred to in
Denmark, probably is very different in Denmark from what you are used to in your
own country. I belive that both US and UK, from where I know I have many
readers, have had people of other ethnic background for many years. But this
situation is very new to us here in Denmark, and we haven't really got used to
it yet.
This is one of the longest stories I have written so far. It has taken almost
two months to write and proof but I think it has been worth it. My first three
sexual experiences all happened within a 6 week summer vacation. Thanks to my
diaries I remember most of the encounters in great detail. I hope you have as
much fun reading it as I had rewriting the notes from the diaries.
Until just recently it was more than 15 years since I had been on a horse. It
was fantastic doing it again, and I can't udnerstand why it has taken me so long
to. The experience triggered a number of images in my mind and I had an actual
dream about riding naked in the forest, which prompted this story.
After I had written The Wonders of Hypnosis I felt like getting back to
writing about myself. This is one of the "truest" stories I have
published. Just as I am en exhibitionist when it comes to my sexual experiences,
so I am when it comes to publishing my stories. Actually writing this and
putting it on the net is a huge turn-on for me. It is so close to the truth,
that Poul (my husband) or anybody present at the restaturants overlooking the
little lake, will immediately recognise it.
Well that certainly took some time. This story is one I have made up based
upon a few small items I have either read or seen (pictures). I really haven't
experienced anything like this, but it was still fun to write. It did mean
however, that I had no notes or anything to base the story on, so it was much
more difficult to get into that normally. Therefor the long wait. Sorry - I hope
more should be coming soon.
PS: This link shows the picture which prompted me to write the pool room
scene. Thanks for my friend Ted for sending it to me (almost 6 months ago). Pool
room girls. (If anybody think I am breaking a CopyRight by showing this then
pls. let me know - I don't know the origin of this picture).
You may not believe it, but during the years with my husband I have been very
good. Mostly what I have done has been with Poul. Only a few times have I been
with other men, and it has really only been rather innocent situations, which he
should not be worried about. However, what you don't know... This is a story, of
which I was initially "Not So Proud".
Ouch, it has been more than a month again! Recently I have found myself
thinking a lot about what excites guys. I also wondered what I would feel like
if I knew my husband had a relationship with somebody else. I have found that I
actually can think these thought throught better if I write them down. So I
decided to write a story where I let my husband have a sexual encounter with one
of my friends and see how I felt about it afterwards. I have to admit that I
found it very exciting to write, but I am not so sure I would it to happen for
real. Maybe if I knew he had done it, but I didn't know the person. In this
story I really would feel bad about being with Sarah afterwards, had I known she
had been with my husband.
Another thing is happening. I have been so curious about this idea about guys
enjoying watching their wives with somebody else, that I have talked to people
about it (from a clinical psychological point of view). I discussed it with my
husband, but it soon got away from the clinical talk. It turned out that he had
exactly the same thoughts about me! I felt very confused afterwards. It is ok to
write about, but it was so much more personal to find out that your husband has
the same ideas. In one way I am disgusted, in one way I am entrigued and some
times I catch myself thinking that if he feels so strong about it, maybe we
should try? My excitement and my disgust battle. I guess my disgust is just some
morality, and a little bit of fear of the thought that something might break
between us. I really cannot understand what the guy gets out of watching his
wife with somebody else. Guys are supposed to be protective and jealoux. How
does this fit together? Do I dare to go down this road and see what happens?
30-jan-2000 - Remotely controlled
Finally a full story to publish. Not even dug out from the old files, but a
new one which started to develop in my head during the Christmas holidays. Took
some time to get it down on paper, but it is finally here. Hope you enjoy "Remote
Controlled".
19-jan-2000
Time flies. I spent December temping at a hospital in Jutland, and after that
it was Christmas. The only item to add to my site is a proof read version of the
very first story, thanks to my friend PJ. However I have worked the last three
weeks on a story. I have sent it to PJ for proofing today, so with a bit of luck
it should go on line next week some time.
I have also spent a number of hours replying to mails. I love it when I get
mails. Especially I like it when people tell me what it was that really turned
them on. One of the guys was very graphical in his description of what he would
have liked to do to me in a specific situation. I hadn't expected that it would
happen to me, but it actually got me very excited. Keep it coming guys!
22-nov-1999
Yes I know. It has been a very long time since the last upload. Actually I
think I overdosed on the high of publishing. All of a sudden I was fed up with
sex (well, not the real thing, just these stories ;-) I had spent all my spare
time writing, figuring out how to make a home page etc. Fortunately I feel much
better now. Writing the stories, has made me even more interested in sex with my
husband (I am sure he can't understand why I all of a sudden am so eager to try
out new ideas). Another big thing which has happened is that a reader has
offered to proofread my stories. I know I make mistakes, but only after having
seen the corrections have I realized how confusing to the story some of my
mistakes are. Also, I would like to get the stories reviewed, and I can't do
that with all the errors. So beginning with todays story, there should be only
very few mistakes.
Todays story is an old one I have brushed up. My old stories contains the
real names and places, so I have to make sure they are "changed to protect
the innocent." The story is mostly a thought experiment I once had. I
wanted to write out a fantasy about being with another man while Poul watched.
Not that I really had that fantasy, but Poul does. Rather than just rejecting
the idea, I wanted to play with it in my head and see how I felt. The story is
the result of that. I am afraid writing it didn't make me any more interested in
doing it at the time. But it was fun writing it. I hope you enjoy reading it as
well.
29-aug-1999
Ok, so my dreams of a sexual encounter with my old friend
Mary-Ann was well received. That was actually the only story I
had of the kind. Being asked for more I decided to tell about the
first and only real time I had with another girl. It is really
very innocent. Read for yourself the story I just uploaded today:
"US Encounters".
27-aug-1999
I am very flattered with the number of downloads my stores are
getting and I just love the comments. Keep them coming, please.
Today I am uploading one of the first dreams I can remember
documenting. It is called "the electricians". When I
wrote it many years ago I had dreams of sex with many men at a
time, and preferable the somewhat rough types. As I have been
translating this into English, I have realised that that doesn't
come across as well as I seemed to remember. However, at the time
I also felt very excited about daring to dream of sex with my
best girlfriend. I think that comes across a bit better. I hope
that you enjoy it anyway. Let me know either way, please..
22-aug-1999.
Today I am uploading these pages to ASSTR. I am quite excited
about it. I have never made a home page before. It is not as
difficult as I thought it might be. But then again, I am not
doing anything fancy. At this point of time I have the first 5
stories ready for you. As I add further ones, I will put a
comment about them on this page.
Only the first three I have posted previously at
alt.sex.stories. The fourth "Tied and Tried" is about a
very, very strong true experience, which I still don't know how I
really feel about. I used to be very resolved in my relation to
sex and my own feelings, but this one really has shaken me.
The fifth one "The Milkman" is also a true story. I
don't have a lot of real true stories from my recent life. Most
of the true stories are from the earlier years of my life when I
didn't need to fantasise. This is the story about one of the few
times during my married life I have had a real sexual experience
with somebody else. I don't even feel bad or guilty about it. It
woke me up from a long period of sexual inactivity, and my
husband really wouldn't need to feel jealous had he known about
it. I see the guy regularly, and there is absolutely nothing more
between us, just a very strong feeling of friendship.
