The next morning I went to swim practice at the Y as usual. The Y, however, had started to get whacky. In particular, Ethan and his girlfriend Caitlin were undressing near the center of the locker room formerly known as Men's. Caitlin was on the girl's swim team at Inner Outlands High School.

"Hi, Ethan. Hi Caitlin," I greeted them, "What's up?"

"Just practice," answered Ethan. And with that, he and Caitlin strolled out naked toward the pool.

I just stood and thought about that for a moment or two, then changed into my suit and started my laps. I didn't know Caitlin very well except that she was a good swimmer and built like it. Solid shoulders, well-muscled all over, trim and taut. She had attractive blonde hair cut short like most girl swimmers. And also like most swimmers, she was sleek and hairless everywhere else.

For the next hour I did laps as usual, concentrating mostly on my strokes and breathing. But even so, I couldn't help notice that several other swimmers were, like Ethan and Caitlin, practicing naked. It was hard to imagine everyone doing it, and even harder to imagine myself swimming and walking on deck completely naked.

When I finished my laps, Ethan and Caitlin followed me to the locker room. I went to fetch my locker basket, but they proceeded directly to the showers. Based on their giggles, they were at least washing each other and probably more. A few other swimmers went in and showered as usual.

I sat and waited for Ethan and Caitlin to finish, get dressed, and leave before I stripped down and headed for the showers myself. Two more girls entered the locker room while I was dressing, but I just minded my business and left.

From the Y, I drove directly to the medical building for my doctor's appointment.

"Hi, Adam. Ready for your appointment?" the receptionist asked.

Her name was Holly Dooley, and like receptionists almost everywhere, she worked naked. A glass wall divided her office from the waiting room, and the reception counter was glass as well. Holly had been Dr. Polk's receptionist ever since I was a little kid. Back then, of course, the wall was solid and Holly wore normal clothes. I liked things better that way but despite everything, Holly seemed completely at ease.

"Sure," I replied, checking out her haircut. It was some kind of buzz cut.

"OK, you're next in line. Please have a seat," she encouraged.

A few moments later, Nurse Riesing called my name. To my surprise, she was also completely naked. Well, except for her nursing hat.

"Hi, Adam," she began after leading me to the examining room. "You'll need to take off your clothes for the examination."

"Don't I get a robe, or a gown, or something?" I asked.

"I can get you a gown if you want," she replied, pulling on some latex gloves. "But most people don't bother any more. I'm not sure we have one your size."

"OK, then, skip it," I agreed reluctantly. But while I was undressing, I snuck a good look at Nurse Riesing and started to get a massive erection. She was much better looking that anyone her age ought to be. I knew she was older than my mom, for example.

"My, aren't we healthy today?" observed Nurse Riesing. "Perhaps this is an opportune moment for a sperm sample. Would you like me to take it from you?"

"Is this a test?" I wondered aloud.

"Yes, exactly," said the nurse. "I'll take that as affirmative." And within seconds, she was massaging my penis and holding a bottle near the tip. In an instant I not only filled the bottle, but spurted the overflow onto Nurse Riesing!

"I hope I passed," I stated upon recovering. "I'm not gay or anything."

"Oh no, it's not like that, " she assured me while opening a towelette. "We need to make sure you're shooting blanks, so that no girls get pregnant by accident. There, all clean. I used to spoil more uniforms that way."

"I don't have contraception in my injection," I told her. "I was going to ask for it today."

"That's OK, we'll process the sample anyway. And it was fun taking it, wasn't it? Now, I need to take your blood, some urine, and your vitals." Seconds later, she was jabbing my forearm with a syringe, then she took my blood pressure and temperature. Finally, she held something that looked like a Mason jar with a handle in front of my penis.

"OK, go," she urged.

"You want me to pee right here?" I asked incredulously.

"Sure, as long as you're naked anyway," she replied. "We could use the lavatory down the hall but I'd still have to watch you."

"I don't think I can go like this," I had to insist.

"OK, please step on the scale. Looks like 6 feet, 2 inches, 181 pounds," she announced. It was all very clinical, but even so it was unsettling to move around the office naked, especially with a naked woman present.

"Now, let's shoot for 180, shall we?" And once again, there was the Mason jar thing.

"I really don't think..."

"Oh nonsense! Turn your head to the left and cough."

"Doesn't Doctor Polk usually do that?"

"What goes on between me and the doctor is none of your concern. Now turn!"

Turn I did, but Nurse Riesing didn't perform the examination I expected. Instead, she grabbed my abs and gave them a strong inward push. I went.

"Very good, Adam!" she exclaimed with some delight. Then, she then picked up a clipboard.

"OK, Adam, you told me one factor you want to change. Here's a checklist of others you might want. Look it over, check each one you might want, and then Doctor Polk will talk to you. Is that OK?"

I said that it was and with that, Nurse Riesing took her leave. I turned my attention to the checklist.

Injection Factors

Mandatory
_____Common diseases

Yes/No
_____Contraception, Male (Includes AIDS and STD)
_____Contraception, Female (Includes AIDS and STD)

-5 to +5 (0 = birth normal)
_____Hair, Cranial
_____Hair, Body
_____Fat Retention
_____Cellulite
_____Water Retention
_____Musculature
_____Breast Size
_____Breast Firmness
_____Penis Size
_____Skin Renewal
_____Pigmentation
_____Libido

The first item, disease immunity, was obvious as well as mandatory. Male Contraception: I had to get that in order to satisfy my mom. Even though I kept the hair on my head short, I didn't want it gone. Body hair: No, I didn't want to start shaving for meets. My Fat Retention, Water Retention, and Musculature were already tuned for maximum performance within the limits allowed for competition. I didn't want breasts. As to the remaining items, I decided to ask the doctor about them.

I was prepared (or should I say braced) for Doctor Polk to be as naked as Nurse Riesing, but he was wearing some kind of skin suit with a lab coat over it.

"Good morning, Adam," he began. "How's it going?"

"OK, I guess."

"That's fine, just fine," Doctor Polk stated with some enthusiasm. "I see the nurse has taken your measurements and fluids; that's fine, just fine. Are you feeling OK?"

"Pretty good," I replied.

"Good, that's fine, just fine. Let's have a look at you, eh?" And with that, he checked my eyes, ears, heart, lungs, and reflexes using all the usual implements, recording each result in his database.

"It says here you're due to review injection factors," he noted. I already knew that. "Of course, we'll recalculate everything based on today's tests, but do you want to make any other changes? Let me see your checklist, there."

I gave him the checklist.

"Hmmm, male contraception: Yes, I'm sure you'll be needing that sooner or later. In fact, I'm surprised you don't have it already. Fine, just fine. Anything else? I see you left some of the questions blank."

"Well, yeah, uh, maybe penis size. My, uh, mom suggested it."

"A lot of young guys are doing it," Doctor Polk said. "Actually, a lot of older guys are doing it, too. Ahem. You seem to have a pretty good head start, though. How much bigger do you want?"

"I'm not real sure," I responded. "But my mom thinks I ought to do it, and I just found out yesterday that swim team is going to be naked this year. I wouldn't want to look, uh, small."

"Do you generally wear pants?" the doctor asked.

"Uh, yeah," What kind of question was that?

"And you dive at the start of a race, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, given those factors, you probably shouldn't get too aggressive for now. Hmm. Maybe a +3, how does that sound?"

I had no idea what +3 meant, except that it was the middle of a one to five scale.

"Yeah, OK. What's Cellulite?"

"I's that wrinkly stuff that forms behind the thighs and butt. You got wrinkly thighs and butt?

"I dunno."

"Stand up and turnaround. You don't," judged the doctor.

"What about Skin Renewal?"

"Well, basically, we trick the body into growing a new skin. People are usually 35 or 40 years old before they need that. Nurse Riesing had it, for example, and now she has the skin of a 25-year-old. But your skin looks fine for now."

"Is it the same deal with Pigmentation?" I wondered.

"Well, that controls how dark your skin will be. -5 is an albino; +5 is pretty much the blackest guy on Earth. Do you have trouble with sunburn?"

"Sometimes"

"Well, how about +1, then? That'll cut down on the sunburn and give you a nice overall tan."

"Uh, I always wear a suit at the pool, or the beach, or whatever," I interjected.

"Well, even so, this will give you a permanent, uniform, overall tan. Is that what you want?"

"Yeah, OK, " I replied. "What's Libido?"

"Oh, that means sex drive. How many hours a day are you erect?"

This was getting weird; I sure wasn't going to admit having a hard on for several hours a day. The words, "Fifteen or twenty minutes," somehow escaped my lips.

"Oh my, that's way below average, especially with the way people dress these days. We'll need to fix that. How about stamina?"

"What do you mean?"

"Can you cum as frequently as you'd like? And what about the quantity?"

"The quantity?

"Do you want bigger loads?"

How do you answer a question like that? "I don't cum too often, or very much," I explained.

"Say no more," said Doctor Polk. "OK, anything else?"

"Like what?" I mean, we'd reached the end of the list.

"Well, there are always new things coming out. Pointed ears; vampire fangs; that sort of thing. No? I didn't think so. I can't prescribe the psychiatric stuff but I can give you a recommendation if you're having a problem. Depressed? Inhibited? Excitable? Overly angry? Trouble sleeping? No? Well, if there's nothing else, it's been good to see you again. Schedule your injection for Friday and if nothing comes up, I'll see you again in six months. OK?"

"Fine with me," I said. "Can I get dressed now?"

"Oh, that's right, you said you wear clothes. Sure, go ahead and get dressed. See you in six months," he said, and then I was alone.

After he left I put on my clothes and headed toward to the receptionist's window. Nurse Riesing was chatting with a lab technician in the hallway, and I nearly ran into her. Holly gave me an appointment at nine o'clock Friday and I headed out to the car.

I was just walking across the parking lot when my PDA signaled a call from Dan, "What's up?" I answered.

"Hey, Adam, listen. My aunt and uncle were supposed to be visiting this weekend, but now they can't make it. So my folks say we can have the cottage. You wanna drive up to the lake for the weekend?"

"Oh man, that'd be great," I replied. "I gotta ask my mom, though. She or my dad might have something planned. Who else is coming?"

"Ben is coming for sure, and Teah says she'll come as long as she's not the only girl. Is there anyone you can ask?"

"What about Ben?"

"Ben's not a girl."

"No; I mean, is Ben bringing anyone?"

"We're working on that. So, you gonna ask your mom?"

"No Dan, I don't date my mother."

"For permission."

"Definitely. I'll call you back."

Now, I could have called my mom in a matter of seconds. In retrospect, I probably should have. Things might have turned out different. But since I was only a few blocks from her real estate office, I decided to surprise her with a visit just because I hadn't done it for a while.

Within minutes I was at the office. Then I was at the naked receptionist, who told me my mom was at her desk. Then I went back to find her. And witnessed the most shocking revelation of my young life! My mom's head was on the body of a naked woman!

"Mom?" I asked incredulously.

The naked body jerked, then dropped its pencil. "Hi, Adam," the head answered nervously. "Well, I guess this is quite a surprise."

"Mom, is that you? And where are your clothes?"

"Yes, Adam, it's me, and my clothes are out in the car. Let's go in the conference room and talk about it, OK?"

I said sure, it was OK, even though it wasn't. I was in such a state of shock that I just followed her lead. But I regretted that decision the moment she stood up and began leading me to the conference room. I mean, there was my mother's naked back, naked butt, naked thighs, and naked everything strolling though a public place, with me just a few feet behind! I tried keeping my eyes on the back of her head but then I kept bumping into things. And worse, the more I though about not looking at her, the bigger and harder my dick became! And this was my mother!

Mom ushered me into the conference room, closed the door, and sat down. Her boobs were kind of resting on the conference table. How could I look? How could I not look? How could this be happening?

"Adam, first I want to apologize for the way this happened. Obviously, at some point, I was going to tell you about this, but I knew it would upset you and I kept putting it off."

"How long have you been doing this? Is it every day? And why? Does Dad know?"

"OK, Adam, here's the story. I've been selling real estate for quite a while, and our family has a good income because of it. I used to sell about 50 houses a year, which is about one a week. Well, last year I sold 35. Then in the first three months of this year, I sold 5. And it's not because of a lousy market; housing sales generally are up."

"There was no mystery why this was happening. We had 18 agents, of which 15 were dressing conservatively and 3 were going naked. All 15 conservative agents had declining sales, and all the naked agents had increasing sales. The national office confirmed the same trend; most home buyers enjoy having a naked agent to look at."

"Well, you can like the facts or dislike the facts, but you can't deny them. Four more agents started working naked, and all four had banner sales the first month. So your dad and I talked it over, and I changed my injection factors, and here I am. Sales are great, by the way. It's kind of embarrassing sometimes but I'm gradually getting over that."

I was stunned. "So, you get up in the morning, get dressed, send us kids to school, then drive over here and take your clothes off?"

"Yes, that's about it."

"How do your clothes end up in the car?"

"I take 'em off in the parking lot and throw 'em in the trunk. We found out it freaks the clients if we open a closet and they see our clothes hanging there."

"So you strip right there in the parking lot?"

"Look, Adam, I know this is hard for you. But think about it. A client comes to the office, we get introduced, we talk about their needs, and then select some properties. Then we walk out to the car, drive to property, and I show them around. So I'm naked in the parking lot anyway. What difference does it make?"

"And Dad thinks all this is OK?"

"Adam, your dad is an airline pilot. Every day he works with naked flight attendants, naked tickets agents, and now even naked security agents. Occasionally he gets a naked co-pilot. So he understands the place of nakedness in the workplace. What's the matter, Adam? I haven't seen you fret like this since the third grade."

"You're my MOM! Where am I supposed to look?"

"Adam, look wherever you like. Hundreds of people see me naked every day. You're my son. I bore you; I nursed you; I gave you baths; I changed your dirty diapers. It's as natural as life can be. Now, what brought you here in the first place?"

"Dan wants to know if I can go up to the lake with him this weekend."

"Adam, stop staring out that window and look at me. I mean, these are just boobs, that's all. You sucked on 'em several times a day for almost two years. I realize you probably don't remember that, but it's your loss, not my problem. Surely you see boobs every day. That girl you were with yesterday was showing. Now, who else is going?"

"Dan's inviting Ben and Teah as well as me," I replied. "But he's hoping Ben and I can find some girls to come along, because Teah doesn't want to be the only one."

"You asked for contraception this morning, right?"

"Yes,"

"And you're getting your injection before you leave?"

"Yes. But I'm not planning on doing anything."

"Well, fine, then. Your dad's going to be flying all weekend anyway. Are you coming home Monday night?"

"Yeah, I suppose."

"Well, I want you home by dark. That'll reduce the risk of an accident and anyway, Tuesday is the first day of school. You'll need your sleep. Is that OK?"

"Yes, Mom. Thanks."

"Now, give me a hug."

"What! Mom, you're naked!"

"Really? I hadn't noticed. Come on now, we'll still have one layer of clothing between us," and with that, she stood up. I suppose a lot of it was her injection, but once I took a good look at her, I realized she really was a fairly attractive and professional-looking naked real estate agent. So I gave her a big hug, felt her back, and gave her a kiss on the neck.

"Whoa, cowboy," exclaimed Mom after a moment. That's when I realized I was hard. "I think you're getting used to this idea."

I stammered.

"Do you have to be at work, or do you have time for lunch?" Mom asked.

"I better get to work," I replied. Despite myself, I felt like hugging her again. Maybe even giving her a pat on the butt. But instead, I turned to leave.

"Am I supposed to keep this a secret?" I asked before opening the door.

"No, not especially. I mean, every day I work, people see me naked. But don't tell Effie and Jeffie, OK? I'll let them know in my own way."

"Is it working?"

"Well, I sold seven homes last month."

This was just too weird for words.

I was in a dark mood as I left the real estate office. People were giving me funny looks but I didn't care; I just wanted to get out of there. As quickly as I could, I jumped in the car and pulled out of my parking space. That's when I remembered having a call to make.

There was a bank next to the real estate office so, feeling stupid, I pulled into the parking lot and told my PDA to call Nadia. A few seconds, her face appeared on-screen. She was wearing her candy-striper hat.

"Hi Nadia, it's Adam," I stated redundantly. "You at the hospital?"

"Yeah, can you wait a minute? I'm just finishing with this patient."

"Sure," I replied, then the screen went black. After a couple of minutes delay, Nadia's smiling face and text information reappeared.

"Adam, you there? What's up?"

"Dan's family has a cottage on Dhrystone Lake and some of us are going there for the Labor Day weekend. I thought maybe you'd like to come along."

"That's kind of major for a first date, don't you think?"

"Well, we had that Coke date. And this is kind of a group thing, not really a date."

"Who else is going?"

"Dan and Ben. Dan's friend Teah is coming too, if she won't be the only girl. Are you OK with that? Dan and Teah, I mean."

"Oh, Dan and I were over long ago. What about Ben?"

"He's not a girl."

"No, I mean, is he bringing anyone? Wait; you're not asking me just so Teah will go with Dan, are you?"

"I really don't know about Ben. He doesn't have a steady girlfriend right now but I suppose he knows some people to ask. And no, I'm asking because we seemed to hit it off yesterday. You won't be Dan's meal ticket."

"What's the cottage like?"

"There's a couple of bedrooms, a living room, a kitchen, and a screen porch. It's right on the lake. You can go swimming or hiking. Dan's family has a boat that's good for water skiing or for just cruising around. It's nice."

"Is this for all three days?"

"That's the plan for now. We'd leave on Friday, and my mom wants me to be home by dark Monday. That's because of the traffic and because of school starting Tuesday."

"OK. Adam, I'm pretty sure I want to go, but let me think about this and talk to my aunt. Is that OK?"

"Sure."

"Where are you going to be later on today?"

"I'm working at Gear and Garb until five o'clock. After that, I'll be at home."

"OK, I'll get back to you today. Hey, thanks, Adam. You're a great guy."

"I like you too," I replied, then I disconnected.

As I'd been speaking, various people entered and left the real estate office: some naked and some clothed. Men, too. Naked, I mean. Nothing but sandals and a briefcase. Then Mom came out, naked as the day she was born except for a pair of sandals. Two more naked women followed, then a naked guy and a guy in clothes. Talking and joking, they all piled into a large SUV. The naked guy was behind the wheel, and he pulled out of the lot. I suppose they were going to lunch.

I saw it; I believed it; and I still couldn't cope with it. My mom was running around town naked, socializing with other naked people, and it was supposed to be OK. Except that it wasn't, at least not for me.

I was at a complete loss. I laid back in the car seat, exhaled, and silently watched the clouds go by. The clouds were high and white, and they caught the sunlight perfectly. The wind pushed them slowly across my field of vision. Occasionally, a bird flew by.

A rap on the car door broke my concentration. "You can't sleep here like that," a voice from behind announced. "Do you have any weapons?"

"No," I replied, placing my hands on the steering wheel.

"Please get out of the car, sir," the voice commanded. "And do it slowly, please."

I did, and faced my accuser. It was a middle-aged guy wearing a dark blue service hat, a shoulder holster, black running shoes, and nothing in between. The hat had a badge above the visor. The holster strap displayed a name tag reading Flagg. "Are you a cop?" I asked incredulously.

"No, I'm the bank guard," Flagg replied. "What are you doing dressed like that?"

"This is how I always dress," I explained. It was a t-shirt and shorts. What could be wrong with that?

"Sorry sir, but I'll need to take you in," Flagg replied. "Please put your hands on top of the patrol car. I'll just be a minute."

I did, then Flagg fetched a bedsheet from the trunk and wrapped it around me. The sheet was printed with the picture of a naked guy, so passers by would see him instead of me in my clothes. Then, he made a call on his PDA.

Moments later, two more guards emerged from the bank. They were both women, both tall, both heavily muscled, and both naked. Flagg pushed me into the back seat of his patrol car, then one of the women sat on each side of me. Flagg got behind the wheel and started driving.

"What did I do?" I asked.

"Anything you say can and will be used against you," warned the woman on my left. After that, I just sat back, enjoyed the ride, and tried to ignore the two naked women probing my shorts for evidence.

To my great surprise, Flagg didn't drive me to the police station; he drove me to school! The hallways were packed with students and teachers, all completely naked!

The two female guards steered me into the office and there were my mom, my coach Ms. Sprite, the school nurse Ms. Nystrom, the assistant principal Mr. Sippling, and Nadia Blosser! And they were all naked! Nadia didn't even have her skirt! The guards made me sit in a straight-backed chair, then Mom began her lecture.

"Adam, you need to stop this behavior," she insisted. "At a bank, for goodness sake. Adam, people don't like it when you hide yourself from them. They feel rejected. It's antisocial of you."

"Did anyone else go along with this?" Assistant Sippling asked.

"No, I was a lone assailant, sitting there in my car, minding my own business," I explained.

"But Flagg here saw you! Anyone else walking by would also have seen you hiding yourself," Nurse Nystrom observed, standing with her breast just inches from my face. "It's just not healthy to conceal yourself in, you know, clothing, or anything else. You could be arrested for indecent concealment!"

"Now Adam, I hate to do this, but we'll need to administer the usual treatment once again," Mr. Sippling announced. "Hopefully, this time it'll make an impression. Let's go."

The guards made me stand up, then they dragged me though a series of doors. Suddenly, I was on the auditorium stage and the room was packed! Every seat had a naked student or teacher, and more were standing along the walls and the doorways. Some were laughing, some were jeering, and some were chanting, "Aaa-dam! Aaa-dam! Aaa-dam!"

The two female guards held me by the arms and made me face the audience. Flagg ripped away my sheet and the crowd roared all the more.

"Does someone have a scissors?" asked Assistant Sippling.

Someone had a scissors, all right; it was Vivian Vivichelli, entering from stage left! As the two guards held me in place, Vivian deftly sliced from my shirt from my waist to my neck until it fell away! Then, she sliced my shorts from hem to waist! My precious clothes became rags and fell from my body in tatters. How would I ever repair them? How would I ever find more?

Standing in front of the whole school, wearing only my underwear, I nearly passed out. But Vivian continued cutting! In no time at all, my last vestige of coverage was eliminated!

Then began the real treatment! The two female guards pointed my naked dick at the audience, then held me in place while Mom began massaging my neck and shoulders!

Ms. Sprite and Nurse Nystrom were next; slowly and exquisitely they rubbed their big nipples against my tiny ones. The crowd howled and roared. I was so embarrassed that I forced my eyes shut and tried to ignore incessant cheers and touts. Then, Sprite and Nystrom began sucking my nipples and rubbing my butt cheeks! As my dick rose, so did the raucous noise of the audience. "More! More! More!" they chanted.

Nadia responded with enthusiasm. Working from behind me, she stroked my balls and smeared something gooey around my asshole!

Vivian strutted around the stage, toying with the audience and raising her arms to beg their applause. Then, with great fanfare, she dropped to her knees in front of me and began kissing my cock. The crowd went wild and despite myself, so did I! My head felt like it was going to explode and so did my cock! I could feel my erection pulse with each heartbeat, and the heartbeats were getting aster and faster!

Vivian held her arms outward, then wrapped her lips around my raging cock. I was in agony. Then, she began sucking me harder than seemed humanly possible. And simultaneously she began massaging the bottom of my cock with her tongue!

I'd never been so embarrassed in my life! How did I get myself into these situations? I felt like I was going to explode! And then I did, all over Vivian! I filled her mouth far beyond her capacity to swallow. The excess spewed into her hair, down her chin and across her breasts. It oozed over her abs, flowed across her pussy, and trickled down her legs onto the floor. One of the guards stepped in a pool of it and almost lost her balance. Still kneeling with my cock in her mouth, Vivian extended her arms and signaled thumbs up with both hands. Incredibly, the din of the crowd reached a new peak.

Eventually, of course, I was spent. The crowd stood in awe. Then Vivian stood up, turned around, displayed her cum-covered body, and raised her arms in victory. The audience roared and then began the chant, "Viv-i-an! Viv-i-an! Viv-i-an!" I was beside myself. How would I ever live this down?

"You see, Adam, being naked is natural and enjoyable," said Mom.

"If you wouldn't insist on wearing clothes, you wouldn't have to endure these sessions," explained Nurse Nystrom.

"You can't sleep here," said Flagg.

"Huh?"

"You can't sleep in the bank parking lot," he repeated, still behind me. "On a warm day like this, you could suffocate. Are you waiting for someone?"

I could do with a bit of Vivian, I thought. Despite myself.

"Ah, no, I'll be moving along," I told the guard.

"Well, drive safely and have a nice day," he said. Then he stepped aside and watched as I backed out of my spot and pulled away. He in his long-sleeved blue shirt and dark pants.

By getting lunch at a drive-through and eating at red lights, I managed to arrive at work only a few minutes late. Mr. Sudstrom didn't make an issue of it.

The customers that afternoon were refreshingly normal. A mother and daughter bought new tennis racquets. A hiker bought global positioning software for his PDA. Two guys bought rock-climbing gear. A businessman bought two dozen expensive golf balls. We had a run on picnic coolers and water jugs. Everyone wore normal, casual clothes.

Dan called at about three o'clock and suggested getting together on Thursday to plan our lake trip. We decided to meet for lunch at his house.

A little before four Nadia dropped by to tell me she'd be coming along. She was wearing a little white tennis skirt and a white shoulder bag.

With that taken care of, I called Jenna and asked if she could work my hours over the weekend. She agreed.

At five o'clock I punched out and headed home.

When I got home, Mom and Dad were watching television in the living room. It was one those dumb Westerns where most of the cowboys and all of the saloon girls are naked. Ratings, apparently, were more important than historical accuracy. Mom herself, I noted with relief, was wearing normal house clothes.

"Adam, is that you?" Mom called. "Would you come here for a few minutes?

"Yeah, what?"

"Would you call Effie and Jeffie?"

I did. Then, when everyone was in the living room, Mom began.

"Kids, there's something I need to tell you. It's not bad, and no one's in trouble. But a few things are changing and I need to tell you about them."

The twins listened attentively.

"Uh, well, I'm sure you kids have noticed that almost every commercial or advertisement these days has naked people in it. The people who buy things like to look at naked people, and so if you want to get their attention, you have to be naked."

The twins listened attentively.

"Well, as you know, I sell houses for a living. The longer I wore clothes, the harder it became to sell houses. Finally, I was selling so few houses that we had trouble paying our bills. And so, although it was very difficult for me, I started selling houses naked."

The twins continued listening attentively, as if they were still waiting for the big announcement. Mom seemed a little flustered at their reaction, or lack thereof, but she continued.

"Because the house buyers always see me naked, I'm selling more houses than ever, now."

The twins were still waiting for the bombshell.

"Well, up until now, I've always worn clothes when I left the house, then taken them off when I got the office. But that's getting to be a nuisance, so I'm thinking about getting naked before I leave home."

Effie and Jeffie continued waiting and listening.

"That means you might see me naked when I'm leaving for work, or getting home."

The twins remained silent and attentive until they realized Mom was done talking. Then Effie asked, "Are you going to get naked now?"

Mom obviously hadn't planned on this reaction. But Dad motioned her to get on (or, so to speak, off) with it and Mom stepped out of her housedress. As it turned out, that was all she had on.

"You have nice tits," Effie remarked. I don't think Jeffie or I could have gotten away with a remark like that, but Effie did because she's a girl.

"Is that all?" Jeffie asked, as if he'd expected something important.

"Yes, that's all," Mom announced. "I just though you kinds should be prepared."

"Can we go to school naked?" Effie suddenly asked.

"Your dad and I will have to talk about that," Mom replied. "Was anyone else in your class naked last year?"

"Yes, five or six," replied Effie and Jeffie, almost in unison.

"What about other places?" asked Effie.

"My friend Scott goes naked everywhere," Jeffie added.

"Brandy and Randy always go naked," Effie remarked.

"Your dad and I will talk about it," Mom decided. "OK, that's all.

"Kewl," said both Effie and Jeffie, exchanging significant glances. Then both of them ran upstairs.

"Are you OK with this, Adam?" Dad asked. "You seemed the most uncomfortable."

"It's hard for me, Dad. Our family has always worn clothes. I've always worn clothes. My friends have always worn clothes. Naked people embarrass me, and I can't imagine being naked myself. Does that make me a prude, or shy, or a loser, or what?"

"No, Adam it makes you none of those things. But being around naked people and being naked yourself is becoming part of our society. I think everyone needs to learn how to live with it."

"Well, how would you like it if somebody forced you to be naked, Dad?"

"I don't know, but I might find out sooner than you think," he replied. "Now, finish anything you need to do and get your rest, eh? Your mom and I have some things to discuss."

I did my weights, then spent the rest of the evening in my room, wondering what the world was coming to.