This short story is an entry in the 2003 Soc.Sexuality.Spanking Summer Short Story Contest and is copyright by the author and commercial use is prohibited without permission. Personal/private copies are permitted only if complete including the copyright notice. The author would appreciate your comments
Category: Line
Magda Gets Sore
By
Don A. Landhill <DLandhill@aol.com>
Magda was annoyed. She was supposed to be in charge of the little brat today, but Jessica just wouldn't mind her. She wouldn't neaten her room (well all right their room), She wouldn't do the dishes (all right, maybe it was Magda's turn). And now it was the last straw. Jessica was simply blowing off her homework to chat on the phone. That was too much. The other things might have been dubious, but «Homework first!» really was Dad's rule.
"Time to get off the line now, Jess. Homework First."
"In a minute, Sis. Betty is just telling me all about--"
"Now!" Jessica put her tongue out at Magda, then went back to talking. Magda strode over, and hung up for her. "Shit! You big bully, you didn't have to do that. I said 'in a minute', and I meant it."
"That's enough out of you, Brat! I'm in charge, and you're in trouble! I told you to get off the phone, I told you twice, but you couldn't be bothered. Instead you sassed me and cursed me. Now I've had enough, and you're getting spanked, Jessica!"
"Spanked?! You can't! I won't let you!"
"I can and I will, whether you let me or not. Come here!"
"Nooooooo--"
Magda dragged her little sister over to a kitchen chair. Seating herself on it, she pulled Jess down over her lap. Magda was something of an athlete, as well as being several years older than her sister, so she was able to lock Jessica's kicking legs under one of hers, and pull up her skirt. She started spanking, hard. It stung her hand. Judging by her wails it stung Jessica's bottom, too.
"Magdelene Katherine Fisher, What do you think you are doing?"
"Uh Daddy, Jessie wouldn't mind me, and wouldn't do her homework, and sassed me, and cursed, so I was spanking her. I was in charge, you said so."
"I did not say you had permission to spank her. Let her up, now! Jessica, go stand in the corner, but face the room. Magda, stand up and get your bottom bare, while I fetch the hairbrush!'
Soon Magda was over her father's lap, being paddled with the brush. She yelled and protested, but her father only repeated that she was not allowed to spank her sister, no matter what. He scolded her for exceeding her authority, while he turned her bottom bright red. "If you are interested in a spanking, try this one on for size." Eventually the spanking was over, and Magda was marched to the corner and told to stand still and quiet.
"Jessica, turn around, face the corner. Magda wasn't supposed to spank you, but it sounds like you have one coming from me." Jessica wailed at this news.
"And Magda, let this be a lesson to you. You are not allowed to spank your sister. If you feel an itch in your palms again, tell me! Such things can be cured."
The End
© Copyright D. A. Landhill, 20 June 2003
Reviews
Ted < quixotoes(at)aol(dot)com>
The narrative moves crisply and rapidly toward a judicious denouement, and a perfectly apt use of a last line. I particularly liked the setup and delivery of the interior line, «If you are interested in a spanking, try this one on for size.»
Patricia < patricia(at)cedar(dot)net >
Very good use of the last line. Quite an enjoyable story. Moved along well, especially with the unexpected arrival home of Dad. I found it interesting that Jessica got to watch Magda get spanked, and not just hear it. Let me compliment you again on a very expert use of the Last Line!
Pablo <pablo(dot)stubbs(at)newsguy(dot)com>
This is a pleasant little story, but it leaves almost no trace behind itself. More distinctive characterisation might have helped; the characters presented here are vague and generic depictions of young girls, with no real depth. The plot is cute, but perhaps a bit too cute and predictable.
The presentation of dialogue might be a small problem, also. There are practically no markers identifying the speaker. Dialogue in a vacuum like that can work, if the speakers are already very clearly defined, and have distinctive voices. Since that's not really achieved here, in several places there's actually some confusion about who is speaking, and that works against an enjoyable read.
Nice, but a bit insubstantial and generic.