This short story is an entry in the 2003 Soc.Sexuality.Spanking Summer Short Story Contest and is copyright by the author and commercial use is prohibited without permission. Personal/private copies are permitted only if complete including the copyright notice. The author would appreciate your comments
Category: Child
A Fathers' Day story in keeping with the ideals of Assville.
Fathers' Day Gift
By
Y Lee Coyote <YLeeCoyote@juno.com>
June 8, 2003
Twice a year Junior had the problem -- at the holidays and in June when dad's birthday and father day were in conjunction. Now, at thirteen it was worse. What the hell could he get as a nice gift for dad? Especially with little cash. Dad had everything he really needed; slippers and ties, underwear and handkerchiefs were what boys' mothers' helped them get; not the things for young men already in high school. Tools would have been nice but either dad had them or they cost a fortune.
Every year, twice a year; the same damn problem!
It did not really matter when he was a little kid. The happy smiles and explanation of surprise dad had were fine for a little boy. Now he knew better. Just like he'd been taught to react to grandma's inappropriate gifts.
Well, he have lots of time to think about it this weekend as he was grounded -- stuck in his room. No surfing; no games; no friends, no anything but schoolwork, chores, reading and thinking. And dad was savvy enough to know how to check his computer internals. It was real hard to try to think of doing something nice for his father when he was being punished and harbored resentful thoughts.
Oh, well, back to reading that book-report book about life in the ancient past of the 1880's. It was the pits but it gave him an idea.
June 10
He surfed the web and found what he wanted. Then checked the local alternative papers and made some phone calls. The prices were lower and no shipping charges. One shopkeeper agreed to sell him the item but only at the door.
June 14
He was at the shop early. Exactly as promised, the item was in the window. Yes, it was what he expected.
The shopkeeper took forever to open the shop; the roll down gates, the three locks and dozens of things inside. But he then appeared with the item complete with a gift box. He handed over his money and almost left without getting his change.
June 15, Fathers' Day.
While mother was busy went to his father. "Dad," he exclaimed, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND HAPPY FATHERS' DAY!"
"Let's wait until your mom's is here." suggested dad.
"No, not this time. This is just between us; you know, guy stuff."
Dad opened the package and carefully studied the item. His question did not need to be spoken.
"It's for us dad; like you told me grandfather did with you. Perhaps the old ways are better."
"I think we should try it so that you know what you're in for, son. Get into position."
Junior was a bit surprised but dropped his jeans and bent over. He quickly realized his error and lower his boxers. Dad raised the paddle and struck the target; hard.
THWACK!!
Junior winced and then pulled up his pants. As they went for breakfast, he started to wonder if a paddle was really a good gift But he so did hate being grounded.
The End
© Copyright A.I.L., 14 June 2003
Reviews
Haron <haron(at)newsguy(dot)com>
This story is easy to empathize with, as almost everybody had to go through the same problem at some point. Not everybody comes to the same solution as the story's clever character. Whether his solution is a feat of selflessness, or a subtle way to get his own, we will never be sure, but it does bring on a smile. Nice story!
Wild Thing <entirely_real(at)yahoo(dot)com>
There's no inkling anywhere as to why the hero would want to give his father the paddle, no hint that he harbors some desire to be beaten or that he has reason to think his father would be gratified by beating him.
Also, focusing on the mechanics of buying an object really bogged the story down in boring minutiae.
Either of these problems would be fatal flaws in themselves, although the idea could work with better execution.
However, the author also has problems with grammar and particularly punctuation. He doesn't know how to use commas or semicolons and puts phrases in the wrong place so that the adjectives apply to the wrong nouns.
«Now, at thirteen it was worse.» Try: "Now that he was thirteen, it was worse."
«Dad had everything he really needed; slippers and ties, underwear and handkerchiefs were what boys' mothers' helped them get; not the things for young men already in high school.» Try: "Dad had everything he really needed. Slippers and ties, underwear and handkerchiefs were what boys' mothers helped them get, not things to be bought by a young man already in high school."
Pablo <pablo(dot)stubbs(at)newsguy(dot)com>
Some very nice plotting here. The story sets up a neat little mystery which carries right through until the end, and is paid off satisfyingly. I'd like a bit more time to be spent on the characterisation of the father and the relationship with the boy. The giving, and acceptance, of the paddle is rather too neat. There ought to be all sorts of emotional issues surrounding such a gift, but they're glossed almost completely away. The end result is a nice, cute, but somewhat insubstantial tale.