This short story is an entry in the 2001 Soc.Sexuality.Spanking Summer Short Story Contest and is copyright by the author and commercial use is prohibited without permission.  Personal/private copies are permitted only if complete including the copyright notice.  The author would appreciate your comments

Category:  Adult
 

Sgt Preston and the Beanstalk

By

David Russell <guyradio@webtv.net>

Charmin comes running in

Sarge , Sarge Somebody named jack needs us His cow was stolen

Thats a lot of bull Come on King and Charm Lets go

Rowlf Rolf sure Rawge.

Put down your paw , You dont have to salute me Damn dog

Rawwwwwwwwwwwwh Sorry King

They arrive in northern Tonroto They wore raincoats on account of the blue jays, ,lol

Sarge , Sarge I need a spanking and he puts Charmin over his horse and spanks her once more

Ohhhhhh Sarge you are a mountie.

Are you Jack

Yes sir,

I dont know jack sir Charmin said I know I know you dont need to tell me

When was the last time you saw your cow

He was jumping over the moon with the plate and the spoon

I know, I know

Whats that beanstalk ?  Oh that belongs to the giant

Is he the cattle rustler/

The three made their way to the top of the bean stalk The giant tells Charmin Fee Fi fo fum

Im going to spank your bum

Ohhhh goodie

I ate your cow It was good

He had a solid gold paddle that was worth millions

Jack grabbed the paddle and Charmin said could you please try it on me when we get home

Sure Charm.
 

They hurried down the beanstalk and Sarge grabbed an axe and gave the beanstalk forty whacks

Then Jack gave Charmin forty whacks with the paddle

She walked beside Sarge all the way home

The giant landed in a garden in the middle of the village.

It was a sunken garden after he landed

He made a big impression on the village

King watered the beanstalk before it was chopped down

Remember if a giant gives you any trouble spank them

dave russell the phantom rider of internet

The End

© Copyright Summer, 2001

Reviews

Michele  <mcasson(at)telus(dot)com>
I love a good pun, and Dave Russell's tales are always chock full of them. As well, he often likes to play with and integrate two very different stories. The results, as in this story, generally provoke giggles and goofy smiles of pleasure.

If Asssville truly were a town, Dave would be a stand-up comic, on stage entertaining folks with his routines.

Needy Wench  <needywench(at)hotmail(dot)com>
I only vaguely recognize some of the characters in this mixture of fairy tales and old TV shows, and jokes about sports teams.  Perhaps sentence punctuation and proper quotation marks would have made it flow better?