Love
and Conscience and Little Girls (Part 1)
by Sterling
Bill
saw them first as they passed the airport security gate at Logan.
"Grandpa!"
Tara squealed as she pranced across the last twenty feet that separated
them. Bill got down on one knee to be at her level, and she beamed at
him as she encircled him with her small arms and gave a big squeeze.
She was four, with straight blond hair that reached to her shoulders
and framed her perfectly symmetrical face. Her big blue eyes were
almost startling.
Her six-year-old sister Kira considered
herself too old for squealing and running, though one suspected that
she would have come bounding just as fast if she had followed her
heart. Her smile was just as big as her sister's. Her wavy light brown
hair reached to the middle of her back, and her face was just as
adorable as Tara's, her big gray eyes fixing him with love.
Bill
rose as their mother Alison approached, and she gave him a big hug too.
Alison was pretty, though her daughters had noticeably surpassed her in
the looks department. Alison was Bill's daughter, and he had been there
for her throughout her childhood. She had naturally pulled away to live
her own life as she moved into college and beyond. Now she needed him
again, and at age 31 she appreciated him as never before.
Alison
was coming out of a rough spot. Her husband Kyle had seemed like a good
man when they married, and things had gone OK after Kira's birth. But
the marriage had taken a sharp turn for the worse after Tara was born.
When she was two months old he had lost his job and had had trouble
finding a new one. Hanging around the house aimlessly, he lost his
temper with the girls. There had not been any physical abuse, but his
flare-ups frightened the girls. He found excuses to be away from the
house, and after three years of tension and absences, he had moved in
with another woman -- a woman without children.
Kyle had left
five months before. The divorce was moving smoothly through the courts.
There were no conflicts about child custody, as Kyle seemed to want
nothing to do with his daughters. Alison would get very little in child
support because Kyle had been out of work for so long.
Bill was
especially delighted to see the three of them because he had suffered a
major loss himself. His wife Anne had succumbed to a fast-moving cancer
a year earlier. His son Matt was doing well enough, but was lost in his
own life in Europe and had little interest in his sister or father.
Anne's
death weighed on Alison as much as on Bill, though it had had fewer
day-to-day consequences. Now Bill was Alison's only family support.
He
was delighted to be able to help out. He had loved Alison deeply when
she was a child, and like any involved parent had felt that tender ache
as she had moved out on her own. Visits had become much less frequent
after Kyle and Alison moved to LA. He would have much preferred that
she stay out on her own in a stable, happy marriage. Anne's death had
not changed that sentiment, but it had shaken it. Bill was lonely.
The
prospect of having Allie nearby again filled him with joy. She needed a
place to recuperate and heal, and her daddy was going to help. She had
been enthusiastic about his plan to buy a two-family house. Bill now
occupied the ground floor, while Alison and the girls would live
upstairs. Each could have their privacy but they could also visit
easily.
Bill
was retired, and Alison knew he couldn't support her indefinitely, so
she promptly set about retooling herself for a career that paid
decently. She had majored in dance, and taught a few classes before
Kira was born. Bill always retained his cautious view that it was wise
to have a way to earn a good living, yet he had approved of her
decision to major in dance. She loved it so much! Now economic reality
had set in, and as he expected Alison was tackling the problem head-on.
Two
weeks after their arrival, she had found work as a software tester and
was taking courses at Harvard Extension as a start to earning a
Master's in computer science.
With Alison off working and
attending school at night, Bill shouldered a major role in caring for
the girls. Alison was able to get them off to their respective schools
in the morning, but Bill was the one to pick them up, prepare afternoon
snack, and supervise homework and dinner. Many evenings he gave them
their baths and put them to bed. He also read stories, played games,
and escorted the girls to playgrounds. There was nothing he would
rather have been doing.
Tara and Kira were not angels. They had
their share of squabbles, bad moods, and even the occasional temper
tantrum. The move to Boston was a disruption to them. They missed their
daddy, but his absence removed a great deal of stress from their lives.
But on the whole they were both easy children and got along well with
each other.
Bill enjoyed their youthful exuberance, their sheer
joy in the simple pleasures of the slide and swing, running,
make-believe, singing, hearing stories...
The internet absorbed
a surprising amount of their time, from Bill's perspective. The idea of
a home computer was completely unknown in Bill's childhood, and even in
Alison's it played a much smaller role. As Bill looked over their
shoulders, he decided that it was mostly good. Games engaged hand-eye
coordination, critical thinking and problem solving. The amount of
fascinating information constantly coming off the internet was
astounding. And Kira was just beginning to chat with friends.
Bill
liked everything about his grand-daughters, but he especially adored
their perfect young bodies. At bath-time the girls were on display,
unclothed and unashamed. Bill felt privileged to be there, to be
trusted with their nakedness. He loved drying their hair and patting
with a towel every inch of skin. Even their labia needed a gentle pat.
Very soon they would want privacy, and the labia and what they
protected would remain hidden from everyone. Many years hence they
would choose to share those parts of themselves with a lucky boy.
The
girls also had that subtle smell that defines childhood, the smell
parents love so much. Bill would unashamedly bury his nose in their
hair and take a deep sniff.
He loved nothing better than to feel Kira and Tara snuggled up beside
him as he read a bed-time story.
Alison
had a tradition with her girls of kissing them full on the lips. That
hadn't been in the repertoire of parent/child affection when he was
raising Alison, but times change. The girls eagerly kissed Bill as well
and he quickly returned the kisses with enthusiasm.
Bill loved
his grand-daughters as children, and he realized he also felt a special
attachment to their girlhood, their femininity. He found their long
hair especially attractive, and he stroked or brushed it for as long as
they would allow.
He felt a little thrill at being able to see
and pat their bare chests at bath-time. Their chests of course were in
no way different from a little boy's at that age, but the unique
feminine growth they would undergo in the future made them special in
the present. The girls' dresses were often loose, of course, and when
they bent over he would sometimes get a view of their bare chests and
would feel a little hint of excitement.
The labia were the one
visible part that defined them as girls. He saw that part of them at
bath-time, of course, but in a way he found them more intriguing when
they were hidden. When he saw the girls in panties he was clearly aware
of what was hidden within. When they wore dresses he found himself
thinking about the panties up underneath. Being young girls their
panties did end up showing pretty often.
It was natural for him
to feel affection for his grandchildren, to appreciate their every
gesture and quirk, the hugs and kisses -- and the pouts too. It was
natural for him to appreciate the perfection of their bodies -- the
simultaneous softness and resilient strength. But he wondered if there
was something in his reaction to their femininity that went beyond
parental feeling. Although his memories of raising Matt and Allie were
murky to him, he did not recall this same kind of fascination with
Allie's body or femininity.
Bill
had routinely pleasured himself throughout life whenever there wasn't a
woman to share pleasure with, and this pattern had continued after Anne
died. Images of Anne came to him as he masturbated, and he was only
briefly ashamed to realize he was imagining her as she had been in her
20s, not as she had been in later years. Fantasies of young women and
teen-aged girls also came to him and didn't trouble him especially.
The
pattern continued after Alison and her girls arrived. Yet as he lay in
his bed at night, his hand functioning as ersatz vagina, occasionally
thoughts of Tara's panties came into his mind. He quickly pulled his
fantasies back to panties of grown women, panties on big hips, panties
covering pubic hair. He imagined the panties sliding down, and the
mature woman's labia parting to reveal the vagina that would eagerly
welcome him within. Yet intruding into his thoughts unwanted were
images of Kira's legs spread, delicate hairless labia held open.
Bill
tried to make sense of these creeping feelings. Kira and Tara were the
only females whose bodies he was seeing and touching daily. The labia
on display at bath-time and the panties he saw peeking into view below
their dresses were the only labia and panties he saw these days.
Perhaps they reminded him of the mature women he naturally felt
attracted to.
Yet within a few months of Alison's arrival from
the West, he found his cock swelling when either girl sat in his lap,
though not into a full-blown erection. It was very noticeable to him,
though he doubted the girls suspected anything unusual.
As Tara
sat on his lap, he sometimes wrapped his arms around her. He let his
hand linger on her chest, and even found himself gently stroking back
and forth. She wouldn't think it unusual. He knew not to do this with
Kira, who had reported to him among all the other news of her day a
session on awareness of stranger touch.
Another realization
slowly crept in. He didn't feel satisfied with some surreptitious
stroking of Tara's chest. He had a yearning to touch both girls all
over. He imagined cupping Kira's labia through her panties, then
imagined a gentle stroking motion. He could and sometimes did lick the
girls' necks as part of cuddly play. But he wanted to lick the rest of
their bodies too, especially the forbidden places.
One day Kira
sat on his lap, wearing a simple blue dress. His hand rested on her
knee, and he felt himself sliding it up her inner thigh -- slowly, just
an inch. It was hard to keep from sliding it farther. Just another
inch? He suddenly noticed Kira freeze and her attention shift to his
hand. It had occurred to her to wonder if this was inappropriate touch.
He casually removed his hand, but he felt shaken.
That night as
he masturbated, the only image in his mind was Kira, legs spread wide,
with his throbbing penis approaching her labia, sliding inside, and in
the magic of fantasy, gliding smoothly into her impossibly small
vagina. As his semen spurted onto his chest, he saw only the image of
sweet Kira with his penis buried between her legs. Worse, his orgasm
featured a distinctive new overtone of pleasure he had never felt while
imagining or even actually making love to a real woman.
"So
how was school this evening?" Bill asked an obviously tired Alison as
she sat slumped at the kitchen table eating some of the leftover
spaghetti.
"Oh, about the same. I think I'll do OK in data
structures. I was worried the first couple weeks, but now I think I can
handle it.
"How were the girls today?"
"Fine. Well, come
to think of it, Kira refused to stay in bed even after a glass of water
and an extra story. She wanted to snuggle but I told her she was a big
girl now. I told her there would be no stories tomorrow if she didn't
stay in her room. Then she stayed, but I could hear her crying for a
while."
"Why not let her snuggle?"
"Well, she's getting pretty old for that, don't you think?"
"No, not really."
"Well, I do. I'm also thinking she's old enough to take her baths by
herself. What do you think?"
"I'm
still worried about her slipping in there and drowning. Did you read
that story from South Carolina a few months back? A girl fell, hit her
head, and drowned. Just eight years old!"
Bill
found it hard to be with the girls now. He loved them as before, but he
also loved them in ways he shouldn't. He needed to pull back and avoid
the situations that fed his fantasies. At bath time he brought a
magazine and looked at it studiously. He had convinced Kira she could
dry herself. He gritted his teeth as he dried Tara.
He didn't
allow them to sit on his lap any more. He tried not to look at them and
really see, because that stoked his yearning. He found himself doing
the minimum to care for them, but no more. If he managed not to take in
the magnificence of his young granddaughters, he could keep at bay his
intense desires, desires he must not give in to.
Alison had waited until 10pm on Sunday to confront Bill, first making
sure both girls were soundly asleep.
"Nothing, why do you ask?"
"The girls say you're no fun any more. You don't play with them or read
to them or let them snuggle. It's been a week now."
"You
know, I'm pushing 60, slowing down. Maybe I'm not up for being a
full-time parent any more. I think I could afford to bring in a sitter
to help sometimes."
"I don't believe you. I don't believe you are slowing down. You love
the girls, don't you?"
"Of course I do. They're wonderful. It's been so great to have all of
you living right upstairs."
"Then why don't you show them you love them like you used to?"
"I love the girls, Alison." Then Bill blurted it out without thinking:
"I love them too much."
"Oh," said Alison, freezing.
He
tried to backtrack. "I mean, I raised you and Matt, and it was
wonderful. Watching you grow up. But I always missed the younger
versions of you. And I can see Tara and Kira getting older right before
my eyes. I'm already missing the Tara who ran across the airport to
give me a big hug. She wouldn't do that any more. I don't know if I can
stand having them grow up on me too. So maybe I'm withdrawing so I
don't get hurt."
That wasn't a bad effort, Bill thought.
She saw right through it. "You'll tell me the truth, won't you dad?"
"Of
course," Bill said. He wasn't entirely sure he would, depending on how
personal the question, but he knew he wouldn't lie about any of the
stuff that mattered most.
"Have you abused them?"
"No!" he said, looking her squarely in the eye. She relaxed visibly.
"But..."
Bill realized that if he finished this sentence, there was no hope of
covering up his forbidden desires any more. His voice dropped to a
whisper. "It's so tempting, though, and I'm afraid I might. I'm so
sorry, Allie. I can afford childcare, at least for a little while. I'll
find another place to live. I'll still do my best to support you..."
Allie held up her hand to stop him. "Dad, don't panic. Give me a
minute." Allie looked stunned. Bill stewed in self-loathing.
"Did you ever abuse me, Dad?"
"No! I never even felt the urge."
"I didn't think so... Thank you."
"Well, as I said, it was nothing."
"Why can't you be the same with them?"
"I don't know, Allie, it's just different. I mean, so far I do act the
same, but ... there is this fire burning inside me."
"Why, dad?"
"I don't know, honey. Why do you feel attracted to men?"
Allie
looked thoughtful, then shrugged before straightening up. "Can you keep
on for the next few days as we have been? Pick them up from school? Get
them snack? Dinner?"
"Sure, Allie." Bill thought that would work OK.
It
was still hard seeing their adorable young bodies. It helped a little
that something would change in a few days. It also helped that he had
told Allie of his perversion, and she was still speaking to him.
It was Monday evening, and Allie had invited Bill up to talk in her
living room.
"Let's review what's happened. You didn't do anything, right?"
"Right."
"And when you were afraid you would, you changed things so you wouldn't
be tempted."
"Yeah, I tried to," Bill sighed.
"Thanks, dad. You're a good man. You were tempted, and you made sure
you didn't give in."
Bill
hadn't thought about it that way. He shouldn't have those feelings at
all, and not acting on them was the least a civilized person could do.
Then
Allie started tearing up. "You've been a wonderful dad to me, when we
were growing up, and since then too. A real rock in my life. A rock who
loves me." She smiled at the metaphor gone awry.
"And now you
tell me you've got these feelings that are disgusting. At least that's
what the whole world says. And the world thinks you're a disgusting
person just for having them."
Bill hung his head in shame.
"But I know you're not disgusting. I know you're a good man.
"Look at me, dad."
Bill raised his head.
Allie looked him in the eye. "Do you want to hurt them?"
"No!"
"I ... I knew that, I just had to ask. So if you did something and they
didn't like it, you'd stop, right?"
"Yes,
I'd stop. Look, I won't even start. But it tears me apart inside
hugging and snuggling with them all the time. Imagine sleeping next to
Ethan Johnson naked, every night."
Allie smiled. She had had a
massive crush on Ethan when he was a senior and she was in ninth grade.
Bill and her mother had refused to let her date him, and it had led to
many tears and a few loud fights.
"I'm sorry, Allie. I guess I'm a sick man." His eyes moistened.
Allie hesitated only a moment. "Dad, you've been there for me all my
life. Now I'm going to be here for you, OK?"
"That's nice, Allie. But how?"
"Why don't you tell me what you'd like to do with my daughters."
"Allie!"
"I'm
going to listen, and I trust that whatever feelings you describe are
fine feelings. I don't think the desires are disgusting. As long as you
don't want to hurt them."
"It's not that simple, Allie. And they're private!"
"Hmmmm. I'll tell you a few secrets about Kyle and me."
"You don't have to..."
"No, I want to. Will you be a good father and listen?" She gave an
impish grin.
She took Bill's hesitant silence as consent.
"He
liked to do me in the butt. At first we fought about it because it
seemed gross to me, but I tried to keep an open mind, and we did it,
and it was so naughty it felt great."
Bill wasn't sure he wanted to hear this, but he tried to be a modern
man, to go along with his daughter's way.
"He
got some porn movies, and I was disgusted when I found out. But I
agreed to watch them, and they were really hot. I made him get rid of
the ones where the women were being degraded, but the others seemed OK.
They were actors and actresses, putting on a show about two people
having a lot of fun doing one of the things people love best. It was a
big turn-on for me!"
Bill wasn't sure where this disclosure was
leading. Surely there were limits? "Why are you telling me this? So,
was Kyle's dick big? Did you have lots of orgasms? Were they big ones?
When did you first lose your virginity? Did it hurt bad? How many guys
have you done it with? Huh?"
"Kyle's dick was pretty average, I'd say. Not circumcised," she said
with a smile.
"That's enough, Allie! I wasn't serious."
"I've
done it with eight guys. The first was Nathan. He was a real jerk.
Shoved it in when I wasn't really ready and came a few seconds later.
It didn't hurt as much as I thought, though. On our next date he raped
me, at least that's what we'd say now. I wanted him to get me hotter
before I let him in, but he wouldn't wait. Just had to get that dick
in."
Bill was mumbling, "Allie, Allie," and covering his ears,
but he wasn't mumbling very loud and wasn't covering his ears very
tightly. It was fascinating.
"Then Byron. He was a lot kinder,
and tried to do what would work for me, and I enjoyed myself with him.
But he wasn't all that sexy frankly."
"Then there was Mr. Wright, my Religion professor in college."
Bill looked up at that. "You did it with a professor?"
"Yes,
dad," Allie looked down. "We had an affair for two months or so. He was
a great lover. I was coming all the time with him. Massive orgasms,
usually two or three."
Bill held up his hand. "OK, Allie, that's enough."
"So now, dad, what do you want to do with little Tara and Kira?"
"Oh, Allie..."
"Please, daddy," she said, making big sad puppy eyes. That had usually
gotten her what she wanted when she was younger.
Allie
had told him some very personal things. It would be a relief to share
some of the feelings that he held inside. Bill started speaking, head
down.
"I want to run my hands all over their chests."
"Mmmm! Sounds like fun."
"I want to slide my hands all up and down the inside of their thighs,
especially when they have dresses on."
Allie shifted uncomfortably in her seat.
"See, you don't want to hear about it, really!"
Allie
paused and got slightly pink, but continued. "No, dad," she said
softly. It ... Hearing the fantasy turns me on. See, I'm kind of
perverted too."
Bill managed a hint of a smile as he glanced up
at her, then continued. "I want to kiss them, not just once, but for
hours, like grown-ups, lips all over each other. I want to put my hands
on the crotch of their panties and gently rub, rub, rub." Bill made the
motion with his fingers in the air.
Confessing these fantasies had given him a rock-solid erection.
It was hard to read Allie's expression.
He decided to press on and let his fantasies go wild.
"I
want to pull the panties down, and spread their legs, and lick the
entire area, gently, maybe poke my tongue into their little vaginas.
There, how's that?"
"OK, dad," Allie said, smiling. "Let me think."
"Heard enough sick fantasies?"
"No, dad, that's not it."
"What, then?"
"You
know, when they teach girls all about stranger touch, there are a
couple scenarios. One is in case men force themselves on them. But
there is another one. The thing is, the girls might like it."
Bill didn't absorb that at the time, and instead changed the subject.
"Did you do it with any other professors?"
"No,
dad." She rattled off the names of her other lovers, one of whom Bill
had met briefly, the others just other men she had met at college.
"But back to the other thing, dad, I listened to all your fantasies.
And I'm not disgusted by any of them."
Bill wasn't sure what to say. "That's nice," he mumbled.
Bill
sat in his living room chair in a daze after Allie left, reviewing what
had happened in the past couple days. Had the conversations really gone
as he thought they had? Allie had probed for why he wasn't being
affectionate with her daughters. He had stupidly let slip that he loved
them too much, and Allie had figured out that meant sexually. She had
not looked at him like he was a monster. Then she had made a point of
trying to make him feel OK with his fantasies. She had told him about
her own sex life, and encouraged by her sharing, he had shared too. He
had spoken of doing all those nasty things he wanted to do with her
daughters, and she hadn't run screaming. She had said the fantasies
weren't gross, and she had even got turned on a little. One layer of
Bill's shame dropped away. He had an image of Kira pulling her panties
down and smiling at him.
He hurried to his bathroom and pulled
down his own pants. Facing the sink he caught sight of his bulging
manhood in the mirror. He started stroking, rocking his hips forward in
a fast fucking motion as his hand pumped up and down. It took less than
a minute. He fantasized about Kira with her panties down, pussy lips
spread wide. But this time in his fantasy she smiled at him, and he
felt an extra layer of pleasure as jets of milky cum spurted onto the
mirror and into the sink.
As he was catching his breath and
cleaning up, Allie's words came back to him. Had she said that one
scenario for stranger touch is that the girls might enjoy it? Yes, she
had. Why had she said that? Was she possibly thinking that doing
something about his fantasies might be OK? The idea of being sexual
with Tara and Kira was terrifically exciting, of course.
But
above all Bill the Good Man wanted what was best for his
granddaughters. Would he need to step in to protect them if Allie lost
her compass on the matter?
Allie
had said there was going to be a family meeting Saturday after
breakfast. Bill had thought perhaps she had a new child care
arrangement to announce.
Kira, Tara, Allie and Bill gathered in Allie's living room.
"I call this family meeting to order!" Everyone sat up straight.
"So, Kira, what do you think about grandpa?"
"I like him."
"Has anything changed lately?"
"He doesn't hug us any more, or pay attention like he used to."
"Yeah!" Tara put in.
"You'd like him to do those things again, right?"
Both girls nodded vigorously.
"Why don't you ask grandpa why things changed."
The girls looked at Bill.
"Go on, ask."
Tara
spoke up. "Grandpa, how come you don't love us any more?" Her lip
quivered as she spoke. That summary of her fears pierced Bill's heart.
What
was Allie doing? She wasn't going to bring up Bill's fantasies for
discussion, was she? Certainly not with all four of them present?
"I, I do still love you," he said, unable to look at either girl.
"Then why can't we snuggle with you any more?" Kira asked.
Bill started blushing.
"It's OK," Allie said softly. "Just tell them."
"Allie..."
"You can just say it," she continued quietly.
"Because, I ..." He looked at Allie, pleading for help.
"He loves you, but he loves you so much he wants to touch you places he
doesn't think he should."
"Like they tell us in school?" Kira put in. "Places a stranger
shouldn't touch?"
"That's right," Bill managed.
"What?" asked Tara. "What is it? What places? Huh?"
"You're too young to know about that," Kira said.
Tara started fuming, but Allie chimed in to head off trouble. "Your
chest, and between your legs."
Tara
hesitated just a moment, then jumped up and ran to Bill. Jeans and
panties dropped to the floor in one fluid motion. "You can touch me
between the legs," she said.
"Tara!" said Kira. "Those are your private parts! Pull your pants up!"
"Thanks,
Tara, but that's not a good idea," said Bill, a bit overwhelmed. He
started pulling her pants back up and she finished the job, looking a
little confused.
Allie smiled. "That was nice of you, Tara...
Kira, it's not that simple. Grandpa isn't a stranger. We're all in
charge of our own bodies.
"There's a new rule around this house.
We can show each other any parts of our bodies we want, if the other
person wants to see. We can touch other people if they don't mind. We
never have to if we don't want, but we can."
"Huh?" said Tara.
Allie
made it concrete for her. "If grandpa wants to see between your legs
and you want to show him, you can! If he wants to stroke your chest and
it's OK with you, let him!"
This didn't sound much like a new
rule to Tara. She had just begun learning about modesty, and the idea
that it didn't apply around the house seemed like no big deal. "Now can
I sit in your lap?" Tara asked.
"Yes," Bill said,
absentmindedly. What was Allie doing? The rule in itself technically
caused no problems. He would make it clear he didn't want to touch them
and didn't want to see anything. Technically.
Tara didn't sit.
As Bill reclined on the sofa, she plastered herself against his front,
legs spread wide. She turned her face to the side, ear against Bill's
chest, and with misty eyes she looked at her sister and her mother.
Bill
kissed the top of Tara's head and wrapped his arms around her back.
Uncertainly, with tentative glances at Kira and Allie, he patted her
butt gently twice. He had a temptation to stop patting and rest his
hand there... but that would be no good.
"There are two more
rules. First, no one ever has to keep any secrets from me or each other
if you don't want. Second, no one can tell anyone else outside the four
of us. It's just our secret."
Allie smiled. "Any further business for the family meeting?" She didn't
wait for a reply. "OK, meeting adjourned!"
Kira looked enviously at her sister soaking in affection from her
grandpa, but then uncertainly went off to her room.
"Grandpa, can we go down to your place and you read me the goblin story
again?"
"OK," Bill said.
Bill found Allie. "Tara wants to come down to my place," Bill said. "Is
that OK?"
"Of
course!" she said, though Bill thought he saw a moment of doubt. "Be
nice! Both of you," and smiled at Bill. "We'll see if this helps your
problem -- and theirs," Allie added with a smile.
"I'm just going to read," Bill said.
As Bill's door closed behind them, Tara spied a book on the table and
said, "Read me more from 'Little House In the Big Woods'!"
Bill
picked up the book and settled into the armchair. Tara plopped in his
lap. He enjoyed the warmth of her butt against his crotch. As he held
the book open and started reading, his hand crept onto the front of her
shirt. First he rested it against her chest. That was OK, right? No
permission needed for that.
He should just put his hand down at
his side. He had meant it when he told Allie all he was going to do was
read. But the hand didn't move. He desperately wanted to stroke her
chest. All he had to do was to ask. As in a dream, he spoke, "Is that
OK?"
Tara took a moment to figure out what he was talking about, then said,
"You can touch me anywhere!"
Bill
had the faintest glimmer of his conscience receding, weakening, then
vanishing from sight. He wanted to touch her. She was OK with it. Her
mother was OK with it.
"Be sure to tell me if I do something you don't like."
"You can do anything."
"Well,"
Bill said, "Let's see." Playfully he pinched her nostrils shut with one
hand and her lips shut with the other. Realizing she couldn't breathe,
she shook him off and giggled.
So as Bill read about Laura,
Mary, and Pa, his hand traced gentle circles with his fingers on the
front of Tara's shirt. Beneath Tara his erection grew. A couple times
he gave in to a strong urge to give an upward surge with his pelvis.
She would complain if she didn't like it, but he doubted she even
noticed.
"Can you be my horse?" she asked when the chapter was over.
That
game was hard on his back, so he didn't let them play it very often. He
thought of a way to make it well worth the potential backache.
"Well..." he said. "On one condition." All he had to do was ask. He had
blanket permission as long as she agreed.
"What?" she asked.
He leaned into her ear and whispered, "You ride me without any pants or
panties on."
Bill had cut himself loose from the morality of the world.
She
smiled at that, and in a flash had removed pants and panties -- her
shoes had come off as soon as she was in the door. She started taking
her shirt off, but he said, "No, leave that on, OK?" She shrugged.
So
Bill made like a horse, whinnied, and Tara mounted him. She had on a
shirt and socks, but nothing else. Looking over his shoulder he could
see her pussy lips spread wide as she rode his back. He could feel the
warmth of her girl sex through his shirt.
He had the image of a
stallion with its cock lengthening impressively as he prepared to mount
his mare. His more modest human cock was hard and twitching within his
pants as he gave Tara a horsy ride. He exaggerated the up and down
motion, reveling in the feel of her pussy pressing against his back
again and again.
Three sharp raps on the floor above were the signal from Allie that
lunch was ready. Tara dressed and they headed upstairs.
Seated at the lunch table, Tara recounted her activities with the
grandpa who had suddenly started loving her again.
"He
read me a chapter from 'Little House In the Big Woods' while I sat on
his lap!" Apparently she felt no need to mention the massage he had
given her chest.
"Then he gave me a horsy ride -- but he had me take my pants off!"
Bill
looked anxiously at Allie. Was this really going to be all right with
her? She looked at him and shook her head slightly, as if to say, "You
naughty man!" but it was entirely friendly and accepting.
But Kira fumed.
After lunch Allie set Tara up with an engrossing craft project in her
own room so the other three of them could talk.
"Kira is feeling left out," Allie reported simply.
"I'm sorry, kiddo," Bill said.
"Can I come downstairs with you after lunch?" asked Kira.
"Yes..." he said, equivocating.
Allie said, "Remember, Kira, he feels like doing naughty things with
you. Anything naughty you'd be willing to do?"
Kira was noncommittal.
"Just
remember, you don't have to do anything you don't want -- but he
doesn't have to let you snuggle, either!" "Kira, can I kiss you?" Bill
asked.
Bill
read Kira the same chapter from "Little House" that he had read to
Tara, careful not to touch her in any of the forbidden places.
"Now can I have a horsy ride?" she asked.
"You're awfully big for that!" Bill said.
"Please!" she wheedled.
"Well, what about that kiss."
"OK," she said.
As
they sat in the chair together, she started by giving him the
ceremonial family kiss on the lips. Bill repeated it with her, and then
repeated it again. She smiled with amusement.
Then he rested his
lips against hers, gently brushing grandpa lips against little girl
lips. She broke the embrace to look at him.
"You want to stop?" he asked.
She knew without asking that she hadn't offered him enough intimacy yet
to warrant a horsy ride.
For answer she closed her eyes and pushed her lips up at him. It was so
sweet, Bill thought.
Their
lips met again, brushing lightly over each other. After a minute, Bill
said, "Can we lie on the sofa? My neck's getting tired from bending
down."
In the new, more comfortable position they kissed for
some minutes, making the telltale little noises as lips joined and
parted again. Then Bill could feel Kira relax. She started initiating
kisses, and her breathing showed she was actively enjoying it. He
tentatively tried pushing his tongue between her lips. When she caught
on to what he was doing they started exploring each other's mouths with
tongues. Kira was amused at first, then taken with the sensations.
Bill
started winding down the kissing after fifteen minutes, and Kira came
out of it too. She did not immediately suggest claiming the horsy ride
she had earned.
"I liked that, Kira; did you?"
Kira nodded.
"Would you mind if I kissed your face a little?"
Kira
didn't seem to understand, so he took the liberty of demonstrating. He
kissed her cheeks, then moved to the side of her neck and her ear. She
squirmed and giggled when he found a ticklish spot, but mostly she took
it in and seemed to enjoy the sensuality of it.
Next Bill started licking her cheeks, chin, front and sides of her
neck, pausing now and then to go back to kissing.
After
fifteen minutes of that he pulled back gently and looked at her. That
was enough forbidden play for one day. He settled onto his back beside
her and she promptly rolled over and snuggled against him. To his
surprise she pressed her pelvis against his leg several times.
He
offered her a horsy ride, but after a few steps she realized she really
was too big. Instead, she got him to play over an hour's worth of
cards: Go Fish, Crazy 8s, and Uno.
Both
girls seemed happy with that. They both suggested their Sunday best,
but Bill wanted something they could play in more freely. They settled
on sleeveless summer dresses, Tara's pink and Kira's light blue. Tara
settled on his left in the big chair in his apartment, Kira on his
right. Bill surreptitiously adjusted his soft cock so it pointed up
towards his belly, as he knew it would soon be hard.
Reading the
same chapter twice in "Little House" had been a bit tedious for Bill,
though in a way nothing was tedious when he could run his hands over
one of his little granddaughters. He would have gladly read the
entirety of the stock price listings in the newspaper for that
privilege. Now the girls were ready to hear the next chapter together.
"Can you hold the book open, Kira?" Bill asked.
"Why?"
"Because then I have a hand to touch each of you. Otherwise one of you
might feel left out."
"Why do you like to touch us, grandpa?" asked Kira.
It
wasn't the right time to explain the facts of life and his unusual
variant on natural attractions. "I just do. Why do you like chocolate?"
"It just makes you feel good like chocolate?" Tara looked puzzled.
"Mmmm, hmmmm." He licked her cheek. "Milk chocolate," then he licked
Kira, "dark chocolate." They both smiled.
As
he read more of the adventures of the Ingalls family, his hand traced
over Tara's sides and belly through the thin fabric of her dress. He
tentatively touched his hand to Kira and looked questioningly at her.
She smiled her consent.
So his hands moved in stereo on each of
his little darlings. He started to pull the front of Kira's dress out
from her body to peek down at her immature nipples, but she shook her
head and pressed the dress back against her chest. He kissed her cheek
to let her know that her refusal was OK. Tara was happy to let him peek
down her front. It was such an enticing view that he didn't realize he
had stopped reading until Kira nudged him back to business.
"You could touch me easier if I was naked," said Tara.
"Oh, that would be like gobbling the whole chocolate bar at once!" he
said. "I like to nibble."
He
felt the urge to rock his hips upward and decided to let himself do it,
his engorged tip rubbing slightly against his briefs. He kept doing it
every minute or so.
He moved his attention to the girls' thighs
through the fabric of the dress, slowly rubbing back and forth. Kira
didn't mind that. He slid his hand between the thighs, pushing each
dress down between the girl's legs.
When the chapter was over,
both girls hopped up. "Now we can go to Drumlin Farm!" Tara exclaimed
with excitement. There were farm animals there for the kids to pet, and
injured wild animals to see.
"Wait, just one more thing, if that's OK."
He
nudged Tara to stand right in front of him as he leaned forward. With
both hands he stroked her calves and knees, then slowly slid his right
hand up the inside of her thigh under her dress. He took his time,
luxuriating in each inch of smooth flesh as he worked his way upwards.
"Should I pull my dress up?" asked Tara.
"No,"
put in Kira, "That would be like biting into the chocolate." She
understood a bit of the logic of her grandpa's attraction.
"Oh, Tara, that is so nice!" he said, with passion.
Kira shifted uneasily from foot to foot.
Tara
had instinctively moved her feet apart as his hand moved higher.
Finally his hand touched the crotch of her panties, warm and dry.
His face was slack with excitement. "Can I put my fingers inside?" he
asked.
Tara
and Kira were both studying his face. Tara smiled and nodded, and he
snaked his fingers around under the cloth and fingered the smooth skin
of her labia. All that was visible was his forearm disappearing under
her dress.
"Thank you!" he said, removing his hand.
Tara and Bill looked at Kira. "Now you have to do it!" said Tara.
Kira shook her head.
"Yes you do! It's not fair!" Tara put in.
"No, she doesn't," Bill said, but with a touch of disappointment.
Kira
sensed his disappointment, then leaned forward and whispered in his
ear, "You could do it with me, but not with her watching."
Bill
was sorely tempted. His penis twitched at the memory of their long kiss
on the sofa. But Tara would be very unhappy to be left out.
He
went to his high cupboard where he kept the candy, then leaned down to
Tara: "You've been really, really nice to me, but now I'd like to go in
the bedroom alone with Kira, just for a little. Are you a big enough
girl to be OK with that?"
Tara started to protest, but he held out two Hershey's Kisses. "You can
have these. Please?"
Candy was never allowed before supper time. She took them and smiled,
not thrilled but willing to accept the bribe.
Bill
took Kira's hand and led her quickly into the bedroom and shut the
door. Kira locked it, not trusting Tara's self-control. Bill thought
that was probably prudent.
"You can have four Kisses later," he said.
He
sat beside Kira on the bed. Kira reached up to give him a long kiss,
and Bill returned it briefly. But he knew Tara would get impatient, and
he wanted more.
He then repeated with Kira what he had done with
Tara, but much faster. He eagerly put his hand at her knees and started
sliding it up under her dress, massaging her inner thighs as he went.
Kira smiled. He let her dress ride up, and he gently nudged her to lie
back on the bed. He slid his hand down the front of her panties and
started massaging quickly.
Kira looked uncertain for a few
seconds, but pushed her pelvis back at him. That was so exciting Bill
thought his cock would burst.
He could go to the bathroom for a
few quick jerks and release, but he wanted it to be with Kira. "Let me
know if this isn't OK," he said. He leaned over on top of her and
pressed his crotch against her dress over her belly. She looked
confused as he started thrusting back and forth, his member beneath
briefs and pants. She looked uncertain and a bit alarmed, but as she
wasn't saying "no" he kept going.
His dick didn't want to be
rubbing against cloth, of course. It wanted to be sliding into a warm,
wet vagina. But he convinced it that this was the best it was going to
get, and he felt his climax approaching.
"Aren't you done yet?" Tara asked from outside, trying the door.
"Just
a minute," Bill panted. The interruption broke his concentration for a
moment, but he continued with his rhythm, speeding up a bit. Kira's
stomach jiggled beneath him with each thrust. He didn't have long. Tara
muttered and whined.
A few more strokes and he felt it
beginning. "Oh, Kira!" he whispered urgently, then gobs of cum spurted
into his underpants. It certainly wasn't the best orgasm of his life,
but it was release, and it was very special seeing Kira's gorgeous face
as he pressed against her body.
She still looked perplexed and a
little uncomfortable. "Oh, Kira, thank you so much! I'm sorry I didn't
explain," he managed as he caught his breath. "I'll tell you later. But
that was like a big chocolate sundae for me -- a huge one! You can have
ten Hershey's kisses, just don't tell Tara." With that he kissed her
gently all over the face, then briefly on her lips, though Kira didn't
seem to be in the mood for kissing.
He quickly got up and pulled Kira to her feet, adjusting her panties
and dress as he did.
"OK, Tara," he said, walking a bit unsteadily to the door to open it
and let her in.
"Now we can go to Drumlin Farm!" he said.
"What were you doing?" Tara asked, looking back and forth between them.
Kira's confusion readily gave way to more familiar territory: her big
sister superiority.
"None of your business," she said. This did not improve Tara's mood.
Bill
turned and looked at Kira pleadingly, "We did the same things I did to
you." Kira got the message. She could have her secret with grandpa, and
if they were going to have a good time on their outing it was better
not to upset her little sister.
Bill sponged himself off in the bathroom and changed briefs.
The
girls loved the afternoon. After a quick lunch at McDonald's they spent
hours at Drumlin Farm. Bill took turns giving the girls rides on his
shoulders. He treated each of them to a pony ride. For dinner they went
to Bertucci's and he let them share a big piece of chocolate cake.
Bill
didn't suggest anything sexual with Kira for two weeks. She didn't ask
about what had happened in the bedroom and he didn't want to explain
anything any faster than she wanted. He made sure to touch her just the
way she wanted and as much as possible just love her on her own terms.
Tara,
on the other hand, liked experimenting with sex play. When bath time
was over and she was dry she asked him to stroke her chest and slide
his hands up the insides of her thighs. She wiggled her butt at him.
When
it wasn't bath time, she was happy to let him slide his hand down the
back of her panties and reach her pussy lips that way, and to reach
down the front and back at the same time.
He had always been
fascinated watching the girls pee, and now he asked Tara to spread her
legs wide so he could move in close and have an especially close view.
Bill
tried kissing Tara more intimately as he had with Kira, but she didn't
seem to quite get it. So he was content to let that wait until later.
On
one particular night after bath time, he watched Tara pee and wipe
herself, then found himself stroking her pussy lips for longer than
usual as he got very aroused.
"Can we go into your bedroom and try something before you go to bed?"
he asked her.
"Sure!" she said.
Once in the bedroom Tara closed and locked the door. "I don't want Kira
to see."
Bill pulled back the covers on Tara's bed and got her to lie back. Tara
was still naked from her bath.
After running his hands all up and down her body he asked, "Can I kiss
your chest?"
She
nodded, and Bill kissed a bit but soon started licking, making Tara
squirm and giggle. Soon he focused on her tiny nipples, and licked them
slowly, while above he stroked her hair. He took the nipple into his
mouth and sucked very gently.
Satisfied, he looked adoringly at
his granddaughter and said, "Tara, you are so great. You make your
grandpa feel so good!" Tara smiled happily.
"There's one more thing I'd like to do." He gently stroked her labia.
"I'd like to kiss you down here."
Tara made a face. "Down there? It's dirty!"
"You just took a bath, so it's not dirty. But it feels kind of naughty,
right?"
"Yeah," she said, not looking convinced she wanted to do this.
"I'll
give you twelve M&Ms," Bill said hopefully. "And I'll be really
slow. I'll be licking it like an ice cream cone. If you want me to
stop, just say so."
"OK," Tara said, still uncertain.
He
never tired of looking into those big blue eyes. Bill kissed her once
on the lips, and then on each cheek before moving down the bed to
approach his prize. First he just licked up and down her labia on the
outside. Tara giggled once, then stopped.
He lifted his head, "I like that so much, Tara. Is that OK with you?"
She nodded.
He
went back to licking. Slowly he spread her legs wider so the labia
naturally parted a little. Then he placed his fingers on the outside
parts and gently pulled them apart, revealing fully her girl parts. He
feasted on the sight. He licked her vaginal opening gently, exploring
it, but he soon adjusted his licks to linger on her clitoris each time.
It
took Tara's clit a few minutes to wake up, but once it did Bill could
feel her wiggle her hips a bit and start breathing more deeply.
"Oh grandpa, that feels soooo ... mmmmmmmm."
"I'm so glad you like it. That's the feeling I get that I said was like
eating chocolate."
"Mmmmmm."
Bill
happily returned to licking out his little granddaughter, and his
arousal became so great he felt it as frustration. After half an hour
Tara's pleasure seemed to wane, and evidently she had not had an orgasm.
"Tara,"
he began. "There's a spot between my legs that lets me feel really good
just like you've been feeling good. Now if it's OK with you, I'm going
to put my hand in my own underpants for a few minutes to make it feel
good." It felt very exciting just to tell her.
"OK," Tara said,
looking down with curiosity as Bill slid a hand down through the top of
his jeans and briefs. He made sure she didn't see anything of what was
inside.
The pleasure built, but Bill needed a little more. "Tara, can you hold
your little lips down here apart so I can see?"
She
did, and with the sight of her exposing her little organs to him the
pleasure throbbed, and he spurted cum all over his hand and underpants,
"Oh, Tara! Ohh, Mmmmmm, Aaaahhhhh!"
He flopped down on the bed
below her. She scooted down to hug him. He tried to wipe most of his
cum off his hand as he pulled it out of his pants, but despite his care
a little ended up on her naked back. He smeared it around so it would
dry and she wouldn't notice.
Tara was looking sleepy, so Bill extricated himself and helped her into
her pajamas. He left after a last hug and kiss.