The Presentation

The notice on the bulletin board at La Taverna said "April Silver Clitorides Award Presentation Tonight - Come as you are, as often as you like." The place was filling up.

Have you ever wondered about La Taverna? Many people have, and have speculated about its layout and contents. Some folks liken it to Callahan's Saloon, from the Story Callahan's Crosstime Saloon by Spider Robinson.

Not me! In the first place, there's already a Usenet Newsgroup dedicated to Callahan's: alt.callahan's, it's called, appropriately enough. Any attempt to make La Taverna over in that image is a pale imitation.

More important, La Taverna is a place where adult artists entertain their clients (readers). So if we must be inspired by Spider Robinson, I choose to believe we're more like Lady Sally's House of Excellent Repute. Hidden in a warehouse section of town, it's an entire block in size with at least two levels above the main floor, and various basements and sub-basements.

"You could not descend that splendid staircase without feeling that you were making a grand entrance into the Imperial Ballroom....

"Have you ever seen, in the movies maybe, one of those very elegant and exclusive men's clubs in London, where the rich and powerful hang out? They have them in New York, too, but it couldn't be the same. Picture one of those, three hundred years old, richly furnished and decorated with exquisite taste. Islands of furniture groupings afloat in lots of open carpet. Chandeliers equal to the staircase in magnificence. Two bars."

Callahan's Lady by Spider Robinson

Lady Sally's "Whorehouse" is a very... "democratic" place. In Spider's books, artists and visitors report seeing everyone from bag ladies to the mayor of New York. There are actually three parlors, one for women only, one for men only, and the main parlor described above. There's also a discreet wing for visitors (lurkers?) who don't want to be identified.

Upstairs one flight are the artists' studios and function rooms, where they entertain clients. Think of the studios as individual websites, and the function rooms as ASSM, ASS, ASSG, Stories Online, Literotica, Cleansheets and so on...

Some of the artists have chosen to work primarily in the discreet wing, which we can think of as containing the Fish Tank, Ruthie's Club, etc. I won't keep pushing the analogy, but anyone familiar with Callahan's Lady or Lady Slings the Booze can easily see what I'm getting at.

Anyway... The notice on the bulletin board at La Taverna said "April Silver Clitorides Award Presentation Tonight - Come as you are, as often as you like." The place was filling up.

Gary is by the concert grand piano, on top of which is a silver statuette and a certificate suitable for framing. Someone talented is tickling a 'pathetique' from its ivories. (When Gary tries, the result is more usually 'pathetic.')

"If I could have your attention for just a moment..."

Gary's Muse snapped her fingers, causing a hush to descend the magnificent staircase and individually caress each patron into attentive silence.

Gary grinned. "The winner of Silver Clitorides Award for the month of April, 2004 goes to Tom's Diary by Gina Marie Wylie. So, I'd like to congratulate Gina Marie and all the authors and finalists."

The April 2004 Silver Clitorides Awards Winner:

Tom's Diary by Gina Marie Wylie

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