|
Return To the Celestial Review (This does NOT open a new window) Return To the Index (This does NOT open a new window) Note, to make reading multi-part stories easier, story links (links with dejanews.com or www.qz.to, NOT the review or profile links) will open up a new browser window. When you are done reading the story, or section of the story simply CLOSE the story window. |
|
"In the Moon That Is Always Rising" by o_rofrano@hotmail.com
(lyrical sex) 10, 9, 8
"In the Moon That Is Always Rising" by (o_rofrano@hotmail.com). Guest Review by Morgan Preece. This is an unusual story. The author claims that it is a first erotic story, but I think obviously not a first story. Few writers could achieve such an effect on a first attempt at writing a story of any kind. Not to praise the piece too highly, but this is my favorite story of those I have reviewed for Celeste. It has a lyric quality that would not work in another context for the story has it's own musical accompaniment. Encourage a promising new talent, read the story and send your own honest opinion to the author. Please. Athena (technical quality): 10 (My first ten. So shoot me.) Venus (plot & character): 9 (Plot. Uh, well the story isn't about plot. I've said that before and I find it is true of most erotic fiction. The characters are romantic ideals as befits a story about romantic ideals.) Morgan (appeal to reviewer): 8 (My highest rating here, also. Maybe it was my mood, I lost my current job about twelve hours ago and I needed some fun reading.) Grade for a hypothetical class in writing for ASS would be an "A" and "I dare you to do it again" with a smiley. :-) I am large, I contain paradoxes. Guest Review: "Susan Jennings" by Morgan. Guest review by BillyG (hayden@mindless.com). The story "Susan Jennings" - quite long at almost 39,000 words - is a very emotional tale of the triumph of good over near-incomprehensible and despicable behavior. The wrongdoing initially found its origins in the behavior of military commanding officers in a Vietnamese POW camp and later in a broad-based conspiracy to shift blame and suppress evidence. Three senior officers, two men and one woman, colluded with the enemy for their own gain at the terrible and unbelievable expense of their fellow men and woman in the POW camp. One woman, an Army nurse named Susan Jennings, at a terrible price, attempts to save the lives of her fellows, and almost dies in the effort. Still, among others, she saved the life of one woman certain to die and suffers the price of that attempt by being flogged with a bull whip and then crucified. She's saved from that near-death by a Marine officer, but the gods aren't finished with her, for she and the Marine end up in a cave, hiding from the enemy. The Marine is shot in the leg and Susan performs mind boggling surgery under primitive conditions to save his life. The details of her subsequent heroics are long and impressive. Both the woman she saved in the POW Camp and the Marine officer go on to extraordinary successful lives, but Susan Jennings unexplainably disappears for years, only to surface, emaciated, worn, ill and tattered, the victim, it would appear, of a concerted effort to keep her suppressed. Her friends, the Marine officer and the woman from the POW camp have both become extremely wealthy, powerful and remain steadfastly loyal to her. They move mountains to successfully bring about her recovery and clear her name by uncovering the plot perpetrated by the evil officers. If you enjoy a story of righteous retribution, you may like this one. The good people are wronged to incomprehensible depths and then win out over the bad guys in the end. I didn't much like the story, but nevertheless found myself becoming emotional several times. First, while there are a couple of token and even pathetic sex scenes, this is not even close to an erotic story. The sex scenes could be taken out entirely and the story would lose none of its emotional impact. I've spent just enough time around the military to appreciate how thin and contrived that portion of the story was, and more than enough time in operating theaters to smile at the heroine's battlefield surgical technique. Still, this isn't a story about tactical warfare and it isn't a medical story, so we can overlook those shortcomings. I suppose I reacted to the exaggerated characters in this story. Everything and everyone was simply too much. Too much to believe and too much to be real. Susan, for instance, emerges as a cross between Joan of Arc, Wonder Woman and Job. Too many times I thought, 'Oh, come ON.' The story has a Hardy Boy, ferry tale quality that employs exaggeration over-much to the point where reality flies out the window and Marvel Comics barges in the front door. Ratings for "Susan Jennings" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 8 BillyG (appeal to reviewer): 7 |