|
Return To the Celestial Review (This does NOT open a new window) Return To the Index (This does NOT open a new window) Note, to make reading multi-part stories easier, story links (links with dejanews.com or www.qz.to, NOT the review or profile links) will open up a new browser window. When you are done reading the story, or section of the story simply CLOSE the story window. |
|
"A Present for Paula" by The Warthog (wife watching) 9, 7, 6
"A Present for Paula" by The Warthog (linetwo@connect.net). Guest Review by BillyG (BillyG@mindless.com). "A Present for Paula" is a simple, straightforward story. The protagonist, Bill, is out town on a job with his men. It's New Year's Eve and they're at a dance where Bill meets an attractive woman, Paula. They dance. There's a spark. But she's there with her husband, Patrick; and they're celebrating their one-year anniversary. If you think you know where this is going, you're probably right. A little later, Paula asks Bill to dance and the spark is fanned to an ember. But what about Patrick, Bill asks. "Don't worry about Patrick," she replies. Yep, right on schedule. Not much tension, but the direction is clear. Still, it's not until Bill and Paula have gone to a room and had sex that we get another insight into Paula's arrangement. Perceptive Bill figures it out - "Patrick knows, doesn't he?" Paula replies, "You're my anniversary present." For the first time, Bill's a bit incredulous to which Paula adds, "Yes, its something that I've always wanted, to be with two men at once," said Paula. For those of you who find the social situation a bit titillating, unlikely plot development notwithstanding, you may not turn a hair at the next development. Patrick shows up, all smiles and announces, "Don't worry, honey, there's no problem," said Patrick, "I was just thinking." He paused. "You've always wanted to try two men at once," he began. Paula nodded. "What would you say to seven men at once?" he asked. For the "More is Better School," jump on this one. But for those of you who prefer a token of the third dimension, you'll find this mostly a grammatically correct two-dimensional story that may leave you saying, "Aw, come ON." Ratings for "A Present for Paula" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 7 BillyG (appeal to reviewer) 6 |