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"Tina" by Sclark7 (erotic wife story) 8, 8, 7
"Tina" by Sclark7 (sclark7@aol.com). This review is the personal opinion of Kim, who can be contacted at ghost@nym.alias.net. In his introduction, SClark says this is his first attempt at writing an "erotic wife story", which seems to imply that there is a whole genre that means more than the bare words would suggest. For example, I will soon be a wife for the first time, and I fully intend to be as erotic as possible, come the day. But reading this story, I suspect that is not exactly what the author means. So if I miss some nuance of meaning, due to my unfamiliarity with this previously-unknown-to-me genre, then I apologize up front. Written in the first person, from the POV of a Mark, about to get married to the titular Tina, it documents his slow descent into uncertainty and loss of nerve on the day, and more importantly on the night, of their wedding. Embarrassed by the jibes of his sisters about his lack of manliness, which isn't helped by being significantly smaller than his voluptuous bride, poor Mark's worst fears are made real as he and Tina attempt to consummate their vows in the bridal suite. You'll have to read it to see what I'm talking about, but conventional it ain't! Technically the story flowed reasonably well, but there was the sporadic grammatical error, plus some odd formatting of speech, which incorrectly used periods instead of commas. And a few lurches in tense for good measure. Also the author seemed to use "rather", erm, rather a lot. Finally, by the time I had reached the finale I was giggling almost uncontrollably at the way the story went. After calming down, I was sorta puzzled. So this is an "erotic wife" story, I thought. Shaking my head, I read it again, but I'm sorry to say I started giggling once more. Now I have my doubts that uncontrolled mirth is the response that the author was after, though I could be wrong, of course. Ratings for "Tina" Athena (technical quality): 8 ("Rather" too many mistakes) Venus (plot & character): 8 (I liked Tina. My kinda gal!) Kim (appeal to reviewer): 7 (I laughed a lot; don't know if that's good or bad) |