|
Return To the Celestial Review (This does NOT open a new window) Return To the Index (This does NOT open a new window) Note, to make reading multi-part stories easier, story links (links with dejanews.com or www.qz.to, NOT the review or profile links) will open up a new browser window. When you are done reading the story, or section of the story simply CLOSE the story window. |
|
"Kissing Margaret" by See-El (teen ff sex) 6, 9, 8
"Kissing Margaret" by See-El (See-El@nym.alias.net). Guest review by Fiddler. When I give a story to someone to read, I can wait until later to learn whether I used gerunds instead of verbs or confused "peddle" with "pedal." What I want to know first is whether the story _worked_. I think that this is the real meaning of the controversial third number in Celestial reviews. And, of course, any reader can only tell you whether the story worked for him. The rest of the numbers deal with objective material which might make the story work better, or might kick another reader out of a story which worked for me. The critical question, however, is still how well the story worked. The present story, for example, is better than the sum of its parts. The story line is sweet, if not blazingly original. One young- teen girl, Claire sleeps over with another, Margaret. They go from discussing boys to practicing their kisses on one another to full cunnilingus. The language, while careless in places and reading like a word- for-word translation in others, distracted me less than coarse, or even plodding, language would have. This story would work _better_ with a bit of proofreading and without an introduction saying that it isn't the author's best work. It does, however, work as it stands. Ratings for "Kissing Margaret" Athena (technical quality): 6 Venus (plot & character): 9 Fiddler (appeal to this reviewer): 8 |