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"The Personal Trainer" by SR (cybersex)10, 9, 9
"The Personal Trainer" by SR (parasol_60@yahoo.com). This reviewer has never taken part in cyber sex.... OK, you can stop laughing/gasping in disbelief! I'm not deprived or disapproving, it's just not my thing. So it took me a few lines to realize to appreciate why the author chose the spelling/typing style she/he did. This story is an online MF dialog in which the woman describes her sexual fantasy about a male personal trainer to her cyber lover. What at first seemed sloppy presentation is, of course, an imitation of the typing style people trying to communicate swiftly online adopt. So there are missing letters, capitals, etc. - but this is in tune with the story, not errors on the part of the author. At least that's my assumption. This style does make it harder to read, particularly the absent paragraph breaks. Paragraph are used to indicate alternate speakers, so there are none within the woman's long sections. Bit of a dilemma - go for verisimilitude, as the author has - or adopt standard presentation and be easier to follow. They're both good schemes. The sex is hot and straightforward! >He closed his eyes as the throaty moans from my mouth vibrated the >swollen head of his cock, and began to gently sway back and forth. Though it's difficult to pick a quote - so much is so well described. All in all, a good story. Not much characterization - though of course it's a bit short for that - but a fun read. Ratings for "The Personal Trainer" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 9 Bronwen (appeal to reviewer): 9 |