COFFEE

"Cheese, honey. Baby Doll. Sweetness in my life. My ever loving man. 'C'mere."

'Oh shit! What did I do?'"Yes," very hesitantly and cringing all the time, just sure he was going to duck, the Cheese opened one eye, "Yes?"

"You know, the beering didn't work."

"Yeah, don't rub it in." The Cheese shuddered, remembering.

"We want you to try something else."

"Who is WE?"

"Gran, Auntie Beck, the Teens, Kurt, Bill, Chione, and most of the Family want you to talk Two Voices into a trip to Coffee Country. We all miss our morning cuppa'."

"OK."

"What? No argument? No fuss?" Jo looked suspicious. "What's the deal?"

"I miss my cup in the mornings too." 'and I want some coca leaves.' Naturally the Cheese didn't say that out loud. "Where do you want me to go?"

"Jamaican...we all want Jamaican."

"Ok, I'm going to the South too."

"Two Voices?"

"Good Morning, Cheese." He/she said, sipping from a cup.

Sniff? Sniff? Sniff! "You have coffee!! You wretch!"

"Is that what this drink is called? I love it. It's wonderful."

"May I try a sip? Eww! This is awful! It's coffee but it's terrible." The Cheese looked Two Voices in the eye, "want to go get some GOOD stuff?"

We went EVERYWHERE! We got coffee berries from the northeast region of Ethiopia, Uganda, central Africa, Southeast Asia, Turkey, the western Pacific islands, New Guinea, Madagascar, India, and then moved to Peru, Brazil, Costa Rica, Cuba, Jamaica, anywhere coffee bushes grow. (the Cheese picked up a bunch of Coca leaves from the Andes mountains) We picked up tons of bushes and visited with all her/his fellow experimenters: (odd isn't it? They all had two minds in one body) they all wanted coffee and all the hippies did too.

Most of the campers were still struggling with day to day living so the Cheese asked, got permission, and invited the headmen from the South, Africa, Australia, and eastern Europe to come visit and see how the Family did it.

Back to the valley they went. The coffee bushes got planted in the forest above the beaverdam. The collected berries were sun dried during the day and covered at night because of the nightly rainfall. The African and South American beans were mixed...just because the Cheese felt like it, while the island beans were all dried apart...far apart.

The big day came...The Cheese roasted some of the mixed beans in the big castiron skillet he brought with all his camping gear. Then he crushed them with a stone hammer and ground the pieces with a mortar and pestle. He used his camp coffee pot for the first time since the transition all the while mumbling, "I knew I was forgetting something when the kidnapping took place...I got the pot, forgot the coffee!"

"Ok. It's ready...not that I need to tell you vultures that. Jo and Two Voices are first. Then you can fight over the pot!"

Later, much later, the Cheese and Two Voices were sitting in lounge chairs on the cliff above the camp watching the party getting out of hand, "a successful experiment always ends in a huge orgy. We're hippies. What can I say?"

"This is really a big deal, Cheese. Far more important than you realize. The coffee is going to change the world, we're going to have to have continuous support so we can use coffee as a trading base between our groups and the natives." Two Voices looked at the party, "you know, the headmen from the other sites are down there fucking everything that walks."

"Yup. Ain't it grand? They've been too serious for too long."

"Cheese, you're not paying attention,"Two Voices poked him, "this coffee thing is positively brilliant!"

"Sure I am. This will take coffee out of the realm on mysticism and religion and keep it where it belongs...in my cup!"

"You do get it!"

"Yup. This is going to make your thesis, you do know that?"

"I hadn't even thought about that! You're right! This is going to have a happy ending!"

The Cheese had been wadding up a small ball of coca leaves and sprinkling a little lime on them. He handed it to Two Voices and said, "chew this. Then we'll talk about happy endings."