Oakleaves
Chapter 8

       That small river lead to Thursday Bay.  A quite bay which is unpopular seeing as there is a direct shortcut to Friday Bay.  (How I wish the school week worked like that.)  The only distinguishing mark was an island.  I looked at the map.  It was actually shaped like the letter ‘E’.  We were headed toward it.
       
       "This is where we camped last time we were here.  Do you remember Brook?"
       
       "No dad.  Well sort of."
       
       Her mother chimed in, "You had this cute little pool you set up with stones to hold the fish until we ate them.  You had this one you named Charlie that you would not let us eat.  You were so upset you had to let him go when we had to go."
       
       "I remember."
       
       I just turned to Noah, and smirked.  We brought the canoes up to the shore and got out.  This was memory lane fore three people on this trip.  To Alex, Noah, and I this was just another island.  However, the shape still was a little funny.
       
       The Chambers family all had great fun reliving their last adventure into the Boundary Waters.  We on the other hand did nothing but look around at the scenery.  I did, however, see the pool that was still there.  It was funny picturing Brook pleading for the fish’s life.  I shared this with my friends.
       
       "Oh mommy," Alex taunted, "Please don’t eat him.  I’ll feed him and keep him close."
       
       "Shut up you!" she called out.
       
       "No, I don’t want to let him go.  Mommy, please, can we keep him."
       
       "I’m sorry honey, we cannot keep the trout.  When we get home you can get a goldfish," I mimicked.  This brought a round of laughter.  Even from her parents.
       
       "I don’t want a goldfish, I want Charlie."  To stress his point, as young Brook, he stopped his foot on the ground.
       
       Brook launched herself at him.  "I’ll get you for that."  This again brought laughter to the group.
       
       ooooOOoooo
       We launched our boats and went around the back way of this island.  Truly, I am not sure how it happened.  Suddenly they were there behind us, then they weren’t.  Both Canoes were gone.  Just, gone.  
       
       "Noah, stop paddling."
       
       "What?"
       
       "There gone."
       
       "HUH!!"
       
       "I cannot find them anywhere."  Noah started looking around violently shaking the canoe to near tipping limits.  "NOAH!!  Relax."
       
       "How?"
       
       "Relax, now hold on."  I consulted the map.  There was an inlet that leads from Thursday Bay to Wednesday Bay.  The backside of this Island.  I couldn’t see it anywhere.  All I could see was the far away shore of north side of Thursday Bay.  Now I started to get worried.
       
       It also was approaching that lunch hour.  "You glad I brought those pancakes?"
       
       "Yea." He was already eating his.  I looked at the map further trying to find out where we were.  "Do you know where we are?" he asked. 
       
       "Yea, well, sort of."
       
       "Sort of," he looked skeptical.
       
       "Trust me," I said drawing out the ‘me.’
       
       I started to paddle along the shore looking into the brush, maybe it was hidden.  We passed by nothing spectacular.  It looked like on island, not two.  The only thing of interest was a small bay.  Frustrated, I looked across Thursday Bay.  It was a far way to the other shore.  "I’m lost," I mumbled.
       
       "What?"
       
       "I said…I’m lost."  He turned to the front again.  I knew that he had caste his gaze downward.  I could see it.  I knew he would.  He was feeling depressed and scared.  ‘For no big reason’ was the only thing that came to my mind.  Yea, just keep telling yourself that, your scared too.  "I’m sorry Noah.  I’m sorry.  We’ll be ok.  I promise."
       
       We paddled up and down the shore.  The map said it was supposed to be two islands, but it only looked like one.  The only thing of significance was a small bay.  We turned the canoe around for the third time and just stopped.  
       
       "Why don’t we just go around?"
       
       "Sandbars."
       
       "Oh."
       
       "Come on, lets go."
       
       "Again?"
       
       "Yes, again…and again…and again.  I will not let this island beat me."
       
       "Taking this personally?"
       
       "Arrg."  We started up the shore again.  The bay, that damn bay, was coming up on the left again.  Noah started paddling hard toward it.  "Where are you going?"
       
       "Trust me," he mocked to me.  I went with him and we went into the bay.
       
       "Oh my God," I muttered.  The shore on the other side of the bay started pealing away.  It was opening up.  "This is the way between the islands.  Holy Shit Noah, you did it."  I could almost feel the giant smile on his face.
       
       Once the land cleared away, I could see our island.  There on its shore were Alex and Brook scanning the sea.  "Noah," I beckoned, "GO!"  We  paddled hard.  The ores dug into the lake.  Once we maintained a good speed I called out, "Follow my lead."  
       
       I started to hit the bottom the canoe with my ore.  The sound reverberated. Noah joined me in rhythm.  This got their attention and they waved their hands high.  Once close enough I set the ore down and yelled out.  "We have come to take your island.  We have come to take your gold, your women and children, and your food.  Prepare for war!!!"
       
       Both of them cracked up but grabbed their paddles.  Noah and I had smiles on our faces as we paddled hard into the island.  We crashed the canoe into land and jumped out.  All four of us started to fight with our ores.  "Hey, it’s like American gladiators," Alex said between hits.  
       
       "Well you raiding Vikings don’t seen to behaving much success taking our island," Brooks mother said as she came out from behind a bush.
       
       "We try."  The paddle came from nowhere and hit me right in the gut.  I doubled over in pain, and struggled for breath.  I gasped.
       
       "Give him some room," I heard and urgent voice say.  I forced myself to relax, this has happened before.  I took deep breaths, and eventually it came easier.
       
       I rolled over and crooked out, "You win."  
       
       Noah fell by my side and rested a hand on my shoulder.  "Are you OK?" he said as he got really close.  I just nodded my head.  He smiled and got really close.  ‘Oh My, he is going to kiss me.  Parents.  Oh, fuck, whatever.’  And that is exactly what he did.  It wasn’t a big kiss, just skilled and loving.
       
       "Excuse me.  Is there something that I should know here?"
       
       "Moooooommmm." Brook wined, "Leave them alone."  I started to laugh, right through the kiss.  I just started cracking up, and it hurt.  Noah broke off and looked at me cockeyed.  I held my stomach in pain, but I kept on laughing.  
       
       "Yea, there is something that should be known," I said between giggles.  "This here," I reached up and grabbed Noah around the neck, "is my boyfriend."  I pulled him down for a kiss.  
       
       "In that case, get a room."  I heard her walk away.
       
       "No really, I think you should follow my mom’s advice and get a room guys.  God."
       
       We broke the kiss but stayed near each other.  Alex bent down, "Dude, sorry I hit you.  I didn’t mean to."
       
       "Dude, it’s cool.  We were playing."
       
       "Thanks, now…get a room."
       
       "I cracked up."
       
       ooooOOoooo
       
       "Babe?"
       
       "Yea Garrett?"
       
       "When was the last time I said that I love you?"
       
       "Too long ago."
       "I love you Noah," I said as I turned toward him in my sleeping bag.  He scooted closer to me.  I wrapped him up in my arms.
       
       "I love you too," he said into my chest.
       
       I rolled him over on to his back and I braced myself above him on my elbows.  He looked at me quizzically.  "What?"
       
       "I was comfortable."
       
       "Trust me so was I but…"
       
       "What?"
       
       "Relax, it is nothing bad."
       
       "What?" he started to whine.
       
       "You really are beautiful." I ran my hand through his brown hair and stared into the blue gray eyes I could barely see in the darkness.  He smiled and those creases formed again.  I just shook my head.  "Beautiful."  I knew he was blushing.
       
       "Your not so bad yourself you know."  He reached his hands up to my face to pull me down to his lips.  "And you taste good too.  No seriously.  I love you so much.  Infinitely.  I am so glad that you didn’t push me away because you hated me when I kissed you."
       
       I chuckled.  "It was a reflex.  I am so glad that you had the courage to do that.  That took balls."
       
       He looked down toward his feet.  "Yep, I got them."  I fell on top of him laughing quietly.  "umph," was the only thing that came from his mouth.
       
       I stopped giggling yet stayed right where I was.  It felt good to have chest to chest.  I looked, again, in his eyes.  "I have a question.  Do we know what we are doing?"
       
       "I know I do," he responded.
       
       "I mean, we are tossing around the word ‘love’ all over the place.  Do we realize what it means, I mean, really means?"
       
       "It means that I want to be with you for my life.  I want us to be a single heart made up of two people.  I want you and I to be happy in each other’s arms, without cares, without concerns.  It means that I feel so strongly for you that I am willing to give myself fully to you."
       
       I looked at him, just looked.  Amazed.  I was truly amazed, those words came from him.  Then he looked at me, more like he was looking inward.  Thinking about something.  The faintest glimmer of a tear dripped down the side of his face.  "What is it?"
       
       "I don’t know what I am doing," he confided in me.
       
       "Oh."  I felt devastated.  He was right, but I felt devastated.  ‘How dare he.  This is a good thing and he is willing just to toss it away.  It isn’t right.  He just hurt this relationship.’  I rolled off to the side and away from him
       
       "Your mad."
       
       "No shit Sherlock," I spoke into the side of the tent.
       
       "Why?"
       
       I turned toward him.  "You just said you don’t know what your doing.  That is the equivalent as saying that you don’t love me."
       
       "It is not," he said with a stern face.  "I never said I didn’t love you.  I just want to know what love is."
       
       "Then what about all that shit you said earlier?"
       
       "Umm…."
       
       "That’s what I thought.  You were lying.  Right through your teeth."
       
       "Why are you acting like this?"
       
       "Like what?  How am I acting!"
       
       "Shhh, I don’t want them to hear."
       
       ‘I understood his thought there.’ "How can you just go back on that."  I mocked his voice, "Love is this, love is that.  What did that exactly mean?"
       
       "Its true.  It is all true."
       
       "Then what is the problem.  What is this ‘I don’t know what I am doing’?"
       
       "A feeling I have in the back of my head."
       
       "Maybe you should ignore your head and pay attention to your heart.  What is your heart telling you."
       
       "Its telling me to go…go, go."
       
       "Then…"
       
       "But my common sense says that I have to watch myself.  What if it doesn’t work out.  I hate getting burnt."
       
       "When have you had experience getting burnt."
       
       "Well, when we were pushing each other away those past few months.  I didn’t just stay single."  I have him an amazed face.  "Girls."
       
       I shook my head.  "What makes you think that I will burn you?  What makes you think that I would even want to break up?"
       
       "Nothing…Everything…Something."
       
       "What?" I asked him.
       
       "I’M FUCKED UP!"
       
       "SHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" I heard from the nearby tents.
       
       "I’m just fucked up," he repeated more quietly.  He looked down at his lap.  "I shouldn’t have said anything."
       
       "Yes you should have."
       
       "But you mad."
       
       "So?"
       
       "I don’t want to see you mad."
       
       "I might be mad, or upset, but I don’t hate you because of it.  I still feel the same way that I did when you first kissed me,"  I could almost taste the sarcasm
       
       "Huh?"
       
       I crawled near him.  "I don’t hate you.  You need to work on your priorities.  Who are you going to trust Noah?  Your heart or your head.  You have to decide what is more important to you.  Love or the easy way out."   Then I shot at him, "If I mean anything you’ll figure that out quick."
       
       "Why are you going to toss that in my face?"
       
       "I think it needs to be said."
       
       "You can be an asshole.  Little do you realize what will happen when we get home?  What about my parents?  What about school?"
       
       "Dude, first work on your feelings.  Because if they aren’t sincere, if they aren’t what you said they were then you don’t have to worry about those other things."
       
       "They are sincere, I do…do…"
       
       "Ok."
       
       "Do you know what I mean?"
       
       "Yea, you don’t have to lie to me."
       
       "Come on…," he slumped back defeated.  Why did I feel guilty.  
       
       "Goodnight Noah."  I rolled over on my side of the tent.  He moved over to his.  It hurt.  I missed him already.  We weren’t broken up, but it felt like we were.  He still had my heart, but it felt like it was on hiatus.  ‘Was he right?  Do I know what I am doing?’  I could hear his light breathing.  I turned over and watched him sleep.  ‘I know what I am doing.  I feel so strongly to him.  He is funny, smart, and cute.  We have so much in common, yet at the same time, have differences.
       
       I saw his side rise and fall.  I just wanted to touch it.  To feel his warmth.  I loved the feel of his skin, it was soft and felt of velvet.  I wanted to wrap him up in my arms and make him feel protected.  I felt a tear drip down my cheek.
       
       I turned over on my side and fell asleep to the sounds of his breathing.  Later in the night I felt him crawl behind me and wrap him arm around me.  I didn’t think it is appropriate, but I was too damn tired.
       
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