Subject:     About Kelly’s Diary
Story Codes: nosex
Date:        March 17, 2012
Author:      Kelly <pghpa_girl@yahoo.com>

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                              !!!WARNING!!!!

This file contains sexually explicit material which may include graphic 
depictions of underage, nonconsensual and unprotected sex as well as incest, 
adultery, sodomy and bestiality.  It is distributed on a website clearly 
identified as "For Adults Only".  Possession by a minor is strictly 
forbidden.  If you are not legally empowered to be in possession of such 
material, do not read it and delete it immediately.

This work is copyrighted 2012 to the author. It may be posted to non- 
commercial "free" sites, or in the "free" area of commercial sites so long as 
no changes are made to the content and the Author information is retained.   
Any other use of this work is by written permission of the Author only.

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Hi! My name is Kelly.  I'm 27 years old, happily married teacher working with 
4-6th graders at a small Christian school.  I’ve lived in the South Side of 
Pittsburgh, PA all my life and hope I always will.  Most people that know me 
have no idea what goes on in my private life, particularly when it comes to 
the “diary” that I’ve been posting on-line for over eight years now.  For 
those that DO know about it the question that always seems to arise is, 
“Why?” That’s quite a complicated question so maybe the best way to answer is 
to give a little background about myself and explain some of the events that 
have occurred since I started.

My father’s a senior partner at a small but affluent corporate law firm and 
my mother’s an RN (nurse) so you might say I was raised a bit spoiled. At the 
same time by virtue of being an only child I would say that more was expected 
of me than most kids my age.  Although I may have led a more “privileged” 
life than most, when you take into account the community where I was raised 
we were no more than average.

If I’m brutally honest with myself I’d have to admit that anyone who knows me 
through school or church probably doesn’t think that there’s anything 
particularly unique or special about me.  I wouldn’t say I was ugly but I’m 
not claiming to be a VS model either.  Average height, weight, etc.  Back in 
high school I had a bit of a “reputation” as being bit on the sluttier side 
than average, OK...  a LOT sluttier than average.  It was something I worked 
hard at and was quite proud of Actually.  At the same time I maintained 
excellent grades and was always an integral part of my community and church 
so I like to think that most people just ignored the drama except of course 
the moral police type but I never worried about them in the first place.

If anything, losing my virginity at the ripe age of fourteen put me in “old 
maid” status among the girls I hung around with.  On the other hand it would 
no doubt have been considered scandalous had anyone known that starting at 
the age of sixteen I became involved in incest.  At first it was just with my 
father but over time it came to include my mother, her sister (Aunt Linda) 
and her daughter (my cousin Kristi), as well as my dad’s brothers and two of 
my cousins on his side, both of his younger brother’s family.  I don’t intend 
to dwell aspect of my life here as that’s all well covered by my diary.  I 
only mention it now because it’s important to keep in mind when I talk about 
my life and diary.

When I left home to attend a college almost four hours away it was the first 
time in my life I’d been separated from my family for any extended period of 
time.  Prior to that a week at church camp was considered an eternity to be 
away from home. Not only was I apart from my family, it also meant being 
separated from my boyfriend at the time whom I was sure I was madly in love 
with.  My sex life prior to college was robust to put it mildly so you can 
imagine the effects on me of suddenly being immersed in a strict Christian 
school environment, living in a girls-only dorm, with extremely strict rules 
against premarital sex.  Yeah, masturbation’s OK but it’s no substitute for 
the real thing.  

Because of the lack of male companionship for my sex needs, one thing that 
changed quickly for me was that I began to explore my lesbian nature.  Prior 
to college I was pretty much a boys-only girl if you put aside my doings with 
my mom and Aunt Linda.  With my boyfriend dumping me within weeks of leaving 
home and not having been laid since leaving home, it was pretty easy for my 
roomie Brenda to demonstrate the benefits of having a lesbian for a roomie.

As much as I loved my relationship with Brenda, I still preferred boys but 
since having premarital sex (or at least getting caught) was grounds for 
expulsion, my options were severely limited.  Later as I became more 
accustomed to the school, community, etc. this became less of an issue but 
starting out as a frightened freshman it presented a colossal challenge.  
Even though we weren’t suppose to access “adult” web sites, the filtering 
program used by the university had plenty of holes and so I turned to 
chatting on-line to fantasize and role play as a means of satisfying my 
cravings.  Sure it wasn't real sex but it was better than just masturbating 
in the dark on my back with my eyes closed.  

It didn't take long before I became a regular on several adult chat sites.  I 
was pretty naďve and at first I had no idea what I was doing so I tried to 
please everyone by pretending to be who they wanted me to be whether it be a 
young girl, an older woman, or whatever they fantasized about.  What I 
quickly learned was that it’s pretty darn HARD to be a fake! Sooner or later 
you chat with someone and forget what you told them the last time you chatted 
and so you say something that’s inconsistent with a previous answer and next 
thing you know they “out” you.  The funny thing is that in the process I 
learned to quickly detect the fakes myself.  Sometimes I played along with 
them and pretended like I believed them just to see how far they would go.  
Others were just so ridiculous that I either just ignored them without a word 
or told them I knew they were fakes and then laughed as they tried to lie 
their way out of it.

In the end I found it best to just be ME.  Now when I chat with someone I 
haven’t chatted with in years I don’t have to not worry about what I said two 
years ago.  Funny thing is, I find that a lot of people don’t like me as “me” 
but then hey, that’s their problem.  Same goes for people who want me to cam 
for them or otherwise “prove” that I am who I say I am.  Since I have no 
intention of ever meeting anyone I meet through this forum I simply don’t 
care if they don’t believe me.  If that means they don’t want to chat with me 
then so be it.  It doesn’t hurt my feelings.  All I can say if unlike them, I 
have eight years of “references” and if that’s not good enough, then don’t 
chat with me.  I no longer need the affirmation that I sought when I first 
started.  I do this now for me, not for the entertainment of others. 

So how does this all relate to my diary?

One thing I learned early on was that people kept asking me the same 
questions over and over.  It became tedious to type out the same answers all 
the time.  Not only that, but there was the issue that no matter how hard I 
tried, the short answer format in chat rooms never seemed to allow me to get 
the right point across so I often felt that I was leaving people with a wrong 
impression of me.  To counter this I started to type out answers to the most 
common questions and storing them in small files so I could cut and paste the 
answers in my chats.  Over time I fleshed out the answers and they grew 
longer and longer until before I realized it I had several complete stories 
written out.

About that time I was led by people I was chatting with to adult story sites.  
My first impression was “wow!” but the more I read them the more the majority 
seemed just silly and even stupid.  I especially hated the incest ones.  I 
guess it like doctors not liking doctor TV shows in that when you’re actually 
involved in something it’s painful to see how others who don’t have a clue as 
to what it’s really like to try and write about it.  In my opinion the little 
ones I’d written were already better than most of the crap people were 
posting.  Once I started posting mine the feedback was so overwhelmingly 
positive that it led me to write even more about my past experiences.

Before long I had a growing collection of stories which I dubbed “Kelly’s 
Diary”.  Maybe today I would call it “Kelly’s Blog” but back then “blog” 
wasn't in vogue.  Interestingly, I found that the process of writing out my 
experiences and even some of my favorite fantasies to be erotic and almost 
cleansing in a way that’s hard to describe.  They certainly aren’t easy to 
write, especially since I didn't want them to include any actual names or to 
be detailed in such a way that people could deduce more than I wanted them to 
for the sake of my privacy.  

Over time my “diary” has evolved and like the process of evolution, some 
parts have grown and flourished while others have withered and died.  There 
were a few times when I would get frustrated with the way people responded - 
attacking me and doing their best to bring harm to me.  It would get to the 
point where I would delete everything and vow never to return, only to be 
convinced by my “fans” to try again.  As the site grew it started taking up a 
lot of my time so I tried making it a pay site for a while to at least get 
something tangible back in return for my work.  That actually worked out 
quite well until PayPal closed me down for violating their Terms of Service 
and confiscated my funds for over six months before finally turning them over 
to me.

Perhaps most frustrating for me are the lurkers and attackers.  Other than my 
brief foray into the pay site business, the only compensation I get for my 
work is the feedback of my “fans”.  By comparing the counters I installed in 
the web site to the e-mail I received, my estimate was that far less than 1% 
of the people visiting my site ever bothered to send me anything.  The rest 
just “lurked”.

Worse than the lurkers were the attackers - people who actively tried to hurt 
me by hacking my accounts and/or trying to figure out who I was so they could 
“expose” me.  Why such people even bother is beyond me.  First of all, if 
you’re on a site like ASSTR.org then don’t claim to be bothered by what I 
write in my diary.  I just love it when the hypocrites claim they read it for 
“investigative purposes”.  Second, if it’s not to your tastes then just don’t 
read it! People ask me if I read what other people write and my answer is 
that for the most part I don’t for reasons I mentioned earlier.

There were a few times when my account actually WAS hacked which caused me 
all sorts of problems.  In fact, this happened again to me just recently and 
whoever it was even used my account briefly to contact people and pretend to 
be me.  I was so fed up that I deleted my entire diary and vowed to never 
bother with it again.  How did they get in?  Well I learned the hard way that 
you should always lie in your answers to the “recover password” option for 
your email and site accounts so people can’t guess at them and access your 
account.  

Surprisingly, once I closed my site the lurkers began to come out into the 
light and encourage me to start writing again.  One problem - when I deleted 
my diary on-line this last time I didn't know that my backup DVD was corrupt 
so I lost everything.  Then I was contacted by one of my “fans” who had saved 
all my stories followed by numerous others seeking to help me restore my 
site.  

So now I’m slowly rebuilding the site again.  I have no intention of 
returning to what it was with all the web pages and such.  I plan to restrict 
it text format with no more “tributes”, chats and that sort of stuff.  
Definitely no photos of me or anyone else (sorry, no “tributes”) and all 
identifying information will be removed before posting what people send me, 
regardless of whether they want to be anonymous or not. I MAY post some of 
the things people send me but only if they send it to me either as either 
something new or resend me what they sent before as I lost everything I had.

As I repost the diary entries I’ll try to proofread them and fix as many 
grammatical and spelling errors as possible as people constantly gripe to me 
about that.  Still, I know there will be typos and grammar issues which 
people will gripe about.  Those same people seem to forget that I’m a one-
girl show without professional backup getting ZERO money for my efforts! 

For more information refer to my Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ).  

If you would like to post something on my site, be sure to read my Privacy 
Policy first!
	
Thanks to all those that have support and encouraged me in the past and I 
hope to hear from more of you “lurkers” in the future!

Love ya, 
Kelly 
