	"The Semen on the Sheets"
	By Kaliko Kat

	
	Chapter One: Life as Normal

	Tom Krets came home from work one night, tired as hell and ready to go to sleep, as usual. He quietly thanked God, whatever God looked like, that they'd let him off of work early that day. He opened the door, put down his briefcase, got naked, and took a shower.
	He didn't feel refreshed after his shower, just cleaner. Even more tired from the heat of the shower water, he went into bed and plopped down. As he sat there, he wished his wife didn't have a night job. He missed sleeping with her. But ever since their son was old enough to walk, she'd worked her night job so they could make ends meet. And that had been 14 long years ago. Cullen Krets--Tom's son--was now 15 years old. Tom secretly felt excited for the day he'd leave, so Camille could quit her job and be able to sleep with him again.




	Chapter Two: The Shocking Discovery

	It was just as he was thinking about Camille when he felt something sticky and wet under his hand. He turned on the light and looked at it. He couldn't believe his eyes, and prayed that it wasn't true. For it was quite clearly semen that he had found on the sheets, and Tom knew that he and his wife had not had sex for several years now. Of course, he had a 15 year old son, so he thought it might be that his son was having sex. But then, Tom looked at the dirty clothes by the bed and saw that his wife's underwear had cum in it. It was then that he knew. She had started to hide her clean underwear even since she discovered Cullen stealing it to wear for himself. Tom started to get angry then, for he knew what this meant: his wife was having an affair.



	Chapter Three: The Mystery

	But with who? Who would Camille like enough to have an affair with? Tom thought hard, but all he could come up with was that their only male neighbor was an old man who was so impotent that he needed three viagra pills just to get up in the morning.
	A co-worker? No, couldn't be: all Camille's coworkers were women, and that was something he knew for a fact.
	After a tiresome hour of trying to think of who the culprit might be, he suddenly remembered the DNA identification lab on the other side of town. So he decided then to take a sample of the semen--and the cum on the underwear, just to be sure--to that lab to be tested. He wouldn't let this mystery go unsolved.


	Chapter Four: Waiting

	"Sir, these samples will be finished with testing in about three weeks. DNA testing is a trying process, and we've had a lot of work lately, with so many fathers wanting to know who's the father of their children. So you just have to be patient."
	"All right. But what if it take longer."
	"If you don't hear back from us in 5 weeks, call us. Here's our business card with the number on it."
	"Thank you, this will be a big help for me."
	"You're welcome, sir."
	And so Tom went home to wait for the results. The day after he took the samples in, Cullen came in the front door after having been at the park--his favorite summer hangout--and said "Hi Dad."
	"Cullen?"
	Cullen looked at Tom with a dull look and said, "Yes, Dad?"
	"If you're home and I get a phone call when I'm not home, have them call me on my cell phone number please?"
	"Okay. Why?"
	"I found some er... interesting substances on the bed the other day and took them to the lab across town to be tested."
	Cullen's eyes grew wide and his jaw dropped a little. Then he recovered himself and said, "Oh. Okay." Then he went into his room.
	Cullen's behavior did not go unnoticed by Tom. It served to reinforce his theory about Cullen being the culprit with one of his girlfriends, and using their bed--and Camille's underwear--for their little sexual frisks. But Tom swallowed his suspicions, and didn't worry about the effects of his request for Cullen. He'd told the lab when he would be home, and insisted they only call him during those times. He sighed, for he knew he was being unfair on Cullen. One had to have an open mind in these things. It might not be him at all. After all, Tom's initial feeling was his wife was having an affair. Both couldn't be true, could they?
	***
	A week later, Tom had a rare day off from work, and he used it to look around the house while his wife was asleep. He wanted to see if he could find clues to the truth of the matter. It had been the only thing on his mind since he discovered the semen in the sheets.
	He started by looking through his wife's desk in the den, where she did both work and hobbies, when she could find the time for hobbies. He looked all over in there, and didn't find anything suspicious. Well, except for the coffee stain on one paper. Camille couldn't stand coffee. But he and Cullen liked it. It was only suspicious until he realized that, for he knew that Cullen often put things like that in bad places. He sighed and continued on.
	***
	Later, when his wife was about to wake up, Cullen came in the front door and started heading toward the hallway. When Cullen looked up and saw Tom, he suddenly jumped as if he'd seen a real-life lion.
	"What are you doing here?" asked Cullen.
	"I told you before, I have the day off. God only knows why. My boss has never been kind to me before."
	"Oh. I must not have been listening. You know, I'm a teenager, and we don't often listen."
	Tom had on a face that spoke volumes and then said, "Yes, I know. I was a teenager once."
	Cullen looked at Tom, wide-eyed again. "That's a funny picture. I didn't know teens could go bald." Then he walked into the hall. Tom was just about to make a smart comment back, but he saw Cullen going the wrong way down the hall. He was going towards Camille's room. He scratched his head and wondered about that. Then Camille came out of her room and went into the kitchen to get her breakfast.
	"Hi, Honey." he said.
	She smiled at him and replied, "Hi honey-buns."
	Tom's eyes just about popped out of his head when he heard that. He hadn't heard her use that name in ages, and it wasn't even his! It was what they called Cullen when he was young.
	"This is just getting too wierd." he muttered to himself.
	***
	An hour later, he saw Camille going back to her room. Normally he wouldn't think anything of it, but he wasn't hearing the usual loud music from Cullen's room. He thought maybe Cullen was up to no good.
	"Well, if he is, Camille will stop him." he said to himself.
	And then, the music came on in Cullen's room, and it was much louder than he remembered it. It was loud enough that Tom thought it could cover the sound of someone screaming. So he didn't bother to yell. He just covered his ears and went into Cullen's room to turn it off. Only... Cullen wasn't in his room.
	After Tom got the music turned down, Cullen appeared in the living room.
	"What'd you turn the music down for?" asked Cullen.
	"It was too loud. I couldn't even hear myself think. Why'd you have it so loud anyway?"
	"I-- Because I wanted to hear it in the bathroom."
	"You had it loud enough that you could hear it in the neighbor's bathroom."
	"If it's too loud, then you're too old," Cullen said matter-of-factly. "Mom likes the music."
	That surprised him. But he said, "And your mother is ten years younger than I am, so it makes sense that she would like it. I'll admit, I'm an old coot."
	"You're only 40."
	"When you get my age, Cullen, you'll understand."
	Cullen shrugged. "Okay. Whatever," and went back to the hall. Tom didn't see which way he went that time, though. But since the music went up again a little, he assumed Cullen went to his own room.
	Tom shook his head. He still didn't understand why Cullen went the wrong way. Especially with both Camille and he up. He finally figured that Cullen was being daring, trying to find his mother's underwear.
	Finally, Tom got bored with the TV and put his headphones on to listen to his own music, an easy-listening group. As he drifted to sleep on the couch, he thought about how wierd life had gone on him since finding the semen in the sheets. He hoped that it wouldn't get any weirder.



	Chapter Five: The Answer

	He was in the shower when the phone rang. Cullen had just gotten home, and Tom barely heard the phone over the noise of Cullen's "music." He ran out, naked and wet, and grabbed the phone just in time.
	"Krets residence, this is Tom. May I ask who's calling?"
	"Mr. Krets, we've got the results of those tests. Would you like to hear them now?"
	His eyes lit up and his stomach filled with butterflies. "Yes, tell me now please."
	"Well, we tested the uh... heh hem... the substance on your wife's underwear, and it came up as a 100% match to your wife's DNA."
	"Oh God, I was right then? What about the semen?"
	"Uh... yeah. Well, we had some difficulties figuring that out, and even when we thought we cracked it, we're not sure. It's kind of puzzling. The semen was a close match to your own DNA, but also closely matched your wife's DNA. And the semen was mixed in with the other substance, indicating that the two substances mixed, which we figure is from the act of sex. So uh... how long did you say it was since you and your wife had sex?"
	"It... it's been years. At least 13 or 14 years, if I remember correctly."
	The voice on the other side was silent for a half a minute, then it said, "Then sir, may I ask you a question?"
	"Yes."
	"Mr. Krets, do you have a son?"
	Tom's jaw dropped, and he couldn't talk.
	"Mr. Krets? Are you there?"
	"Y-yes. I'm here."
	"Do you have a son?"
	"Yes. Yes I do."
	"Do you have any other children?"
	"No."
	"Then Mr. Krets, I think your wife and your son are--as goes the current slang--doing the nasty together."
	Tom dropped the phone and his head and began to weep. He couldn't believe it! He picked up the phone and asked, "Are you sure?"
	"Yes, sir. I'm sure. You might want to find out for yourself, though, if you want."
	"Thank you. Thanks. I'll go see. You might have made a mistake."
	The other voice said sadly, "Yes, we might have. Good bye, sir."
	"Bye," he said, and hung up the phone.
	When he pulled himself together a little, he went into Cullen's room to see if he was in there. Nothing. So he checked the restroom. Ditto. Then he set his ear against the door of the bedroom he and his wife shared. He did not like what he heard. He heard Camille moaning with pleasure and telling Cullen to "do it to (her) harder!" Tom looked in the keyhole and was disgusted at what he saw, for he saw his wife and his son in bed together, naked and fucking. He saw Camille's breasts heave as she was rocked by orgasms stronger than anything Tom had ever been able to give her. Her cum was spraying all over everywhere, on top of the plastic sheet that was laid on top of the bed. Then the ultimate blow to Tom's sense of ethics was when, after they both came strongly, Cullen moved positions and began to lap up the cum out of his mother's cunt. He was giving her a thorough job, too. So Tom finally couldn't stand it anymore, and he opened the door and screamed, "You fucking incestuous WHORE! Child RAPIST! How COULD you, Camille!?!?"
	Camille and Cullen both jumped so quickly at Tom's yelling that Cullen choked on his mom's cum and fell to the floor, gagging and gasping. Camille pulled a top sheet over herself and sat up, glaring at Tom.
	"How dare you! You, who call yourself a husband! You never seemed interested in sex after Cullen was born, no matter how strongly I hinted that I wanted some! You mistreated Cullen and expected him to grow up faster than he could, and you've kept a tight leash on the both of us! If you want to blame anyone for our affair, blame yourself! Your controlling ways have kept me from any kind of sexual pleasure, and masturbation was getting boring. You kept Cullen from seeing any girls, and you made me work nights! So you shouldn't be surprised that in our desperation, we clung to each other. Cullen and I love each other, Tom, and I hate you! Cullen was the only good thing that came out of this marriage! I would've divorced you, but I was afraid your manipulative ways would give you custody of Cullen, so I held my tongue. What do you say about that, Mr. Ego?"
	Tom, full to the brim with fury, grabbed a lamp off of the nightstand and made to hit Camille with it. But just in time, Cullen kicked him in the nuts as hard as he could. Tom went down like a rock, but swung the lamp, and hit Cullen in the back, bruising him. Cullen knocked the lamp out of Tom's hand and away from his reach, and then the two males--father and son--started punching, hitting, kicking, and biting each other. It was a long struggle, and might have lasted for hours, but Camille grabbed the wooden bar in the closet that held the clothes up, pulled it out, and cracked Tom on the head so hard that he went limp immediately. Blood ran from the wound, and they checked to see if he was alive. He was not.
	Camille and Cullen held each other tight, and cried in each others' shoulders for hours. They were finally rid of the terror that had brought them into each others' arms, and didn't know what to do next. They would just have to wait.


(go on)
	Chapter Six: The Future

	Luckily, they'd had enough evidence to prove that Tom's death was self-defence. The pension from Tom's job, his life insurance, his social security money, and what Camille's job got them was enough to get him buried properly and ensure them a comfortable life. They only attended the funeral because it would look bad to not go. When Camille went up to the casket, she snuck in one of the pairs of underwear with cum on it into his casket and then turned away. Cullen stole the quarters over his eyes and replaced them with two Canadian pennies he'd found once.
	When they were home together the next day, they snuggled up to each other and talked about how they thought the future would go.
	"Do you think it will get harder when Tom's money runs out?" asked Camille.
	"We'll always have each other, Mom. Even if we turn out poor, I'd rather be a beggar and be free to love you in our special way than to spend another minute with that asshole."
	She sighed. "Yes, it would be better. But you know, now that we're free of him, we could see other people if we wanted to."
	Cullen looked at her. "Do you want to see other people?"
	"No, actually, I don't. Do you."
	"Why should I want to see other people when I know that I love you beyond words?"
	"Good point. But you know, if you live with me for the rest of your life, it could look wierd."
	"Screw what other people think! Our neighbors knew full well what was going on in our house, the situation we were in, and they did nothing. So I could care less what they think."
	"Well, that's a good attitude to have. But aren't you worried about our relationship being found out? This fucking stupid society says it's illegal for mother and child to have this kind of relationship."
	"Society doesn't know shit. Why should it matter what our relation is to each other, as long as we're both consenting? And I know I'm not an adult yet. I don't think that should matter either."
	"But we could get in trouble. I'm not disagreeing with you, I'm just concerned."
	"We'll just have to keep it a secret, then. We should be good at that. It was because of only one stupid mistake that we got caught by Tom. Luckily, he didn't reveal his address." He looked at his mother again, more closely this time. "Mom, think about it. Society is obviously wrong. You and Tom thought you loved each other at first, and come to find out he was a controlling, abusive asshole. Any society that lets him do that to us without so much as a word to him about it, but freaks out when two people in love happen to be mother and child, is totally fucking stupid. So what if we get caught and they throw us in jail? It won't stop us from loving each other, and it just proves that they're heartless morons. Right?"
	"Right, Cullen." She smiled and beamed suddenly, and gave him a big hug. "Oh, I'm so proud to have such a wonderful, nice boy for a son and a lover. I'm looking forward to our future together."
	"Me too, Mom. Me too."
	And mother and son, the two lovers, fell asleep in the couch together, snuggled up close to each other. And the Gods of Love rejoiced.

	***the end***
