Advice Regarding the Relationship Between Cock and Pussy Sizes

This letter was received on 9-14-04

Joan,

My wife and I like your stories, however she is NOT inclined to "open" our marriage.  She has said that she is worried that I might find "better" and leave her, or, vice versa.  

There is only one more thing I would request of you.

Almost all stories on the net, in any and every site or collection I have seen, fails to describe the sensations and feelings the lady feels upon insertion and/or coitus within her pelvis or vagina.  Do you know of any author or authoress that is "published" that goes into such detail?  

Upon asking my wife she says that "I just feel full," and cannot be convinced to relate more details to me.  It makes me feel as though I am too small to fulfill her needs, though she insists otherwise.  

I am, shamefully, very  modest in penile size at 5 inches, and about one inch thick.  But I have this burning curiosity regarding this subject.  

Thank You, Again for all your help.  Please don't consider me too deviant.

Yours.
Neal 


REPLY from Joan ...  on 9/17/04

Dear Neal...

I had to smile at the last part of your most recent note.

Over the years in my role as the "Dear Abby" of threesome sex, I have received so many, MANY notes from guys expressing concern about their less-than-gigantic cock, and their ability to give pleasure to a woman.

Let me share some biological facts with you.  

A woman's pussy IS NOT a "space" or "cavity" that is only "filled" when a cock is large.  Rather, it is a "potential space or cavity," one that has no extra space until something is inserted.  It can pleasantly accomodate a simple finger, and yet during child birth can open large enough to allow passage of an entire baby's head and body.  In other words, it is HIGHLY elastic!

Sure, when a larger cock is playing in there, the vagina expands and exposes more nerve endings that could be stimulated to bring her pleasure.  And, the simple experience of accomodating that larger cock can be a mental stimulaiton to her, thus making it easier for her to reach pleasure-filled orgasms.

But, size is not the only thing that has the potential for giving her pleasure.  Much of a woman's pleasure comes from stimulation of her clit (no large cock needed here), and pressure against her pubs by a man who is giving her an energetic "screw" (no large cock needed here either).  Oral stimulation of her pussy, clit, nipples, breasts and other sensitive parts of her body also often are an important part of her pleasure.  Again... no large cock needed here!

It has been said that the brain is the body's best sex organ... and the saying is RIGHT!  Much of a woman's sexual stimulation begins in the brain... from reading erotica with her lover, from erotic talk with her lover, from the environment where they are making love, from sharing special erotic activities, etc.  That is where an "extra guy" often comes in... the mental stimulation of knowing the touches, the techinques, the screwing is with an entirely new person.  Whether or not extra guys or gals are involved, there are MANY ways to assist your lady in feeling extra sexy, extra feminine.  None of this requires a large cock!

Yes, many women think about the potential pleasures of feeling "full" from having an extra long or thick cock within them.  And, many women thoroughly enjoy such variations occasionally (another reason couples often invite an extra guy into their shared bed).

However, many woman actually CAN'T accomodate an extra long cock.  A fair number of women simply have vaginas which are too shallow to accomodate excess length.  In those cases, the guy with extra long cocks are... as they say... "shit out of luck."

Generally a woman can accomodate a cock that is somewhat longer than the depth of their pussy, because even when fully erect, the human male cock tends to be spongy (unlike the bony-like cock of a dog), and compresses somewhat against the firm back wall of a lady's vagina.  If the probing cock is not too long or too "bony," we gals often enjoy the feeling of having that cock "beat" against the back walls of our pussies.

I enjoy that occasionally.  But, even I have had to turn down a few guys whose cock was too long for my comfort.  In my case, if that long cock is not too thick, I invite the guy to enter me annaly.  Personally, I enjoy anal sex.  And, I can take a cock MUCH deeper into that nether hole, and I enjoy the feeling!

What does a pussy feel like when it is being entered, probed and "filled"?  Well, it obviously feels good.  That "good" feeling comes from the friction of the cock rubbing within me.  If I am too dry, the friction can cause discomfort rather than pleasure.  If my pussy is too well lubricated (from my own juices, from artificial lubricant, or from previously deposited male juices), the friction is often reduced.  In those cases, the actual intercourse can be less enjoyable, but that is often overcome by my mental stimulation (knowing how turned-on I am, knowing that my current lover is sliding through the stick cum of a previous lover, etc.).

That friction can come from a probing tongue, a probing finger, a small or a large cock, or even a dildo.  A guy needs to be sensitive to what the lady is feeling.  Does she want slow, leisurely screwing so the nerve endings are repeatedly caressed within her body until her orgasm is finally released... or does she what to be screwed hard so that the nerve endings in her pubs and clit are agressively invigorated until they cry out for release through an orgasm.

I have intimately enjoyed more than a few hundred different cocks within my pussy.  So, I guess I am speaking from experience.  A cock of ANY size can produce pleasure in my body, if the man who owns it is truly alert to what turns me on, and at what level of turn-on my body is at on any given moment.  On (MANY) more than one occasion, I have been leisurely enjoying the feel of a cock within me, only to have the man unexpectedly lean forward and give one of my nipples a firm but gentle nibble.  That has often sent me over the edge.

Neal, stop worrying about the size of your cock.  Focus more on the size of your desire to make your wife happy.  Talk with her.  Learn what gives her special pleasure... what seems to enhance her femininity.

And, tell her that if she ever wants to experience another cock (long, thick, dark, whatever), she never need worry that the "better" feel of that moment will ever threaten your marriage... as long as it is a shared experience with you present, and with you enabling her to have and enjoy that "gift" (a gift FROM YOU!!!).

I hope this answers your questions.

Much love to both of you,

Joan