First Post to ASSD: Tue Dec 03 


The Blind Date
by 
Kenny N Gamera


Ding Dong. Sound of door opening

"Oh, Hello.  You must be Kenny."

"Yeah, Baby.  Are you Mindy?"

"Yes.  Uh come in and sit down while I finish getting ready."

"Sure thing, Sugar."

"Wow, I can't believe that Katie would set me up.  Well, I believe
that, but not with a guy.  I mean, she has been after me for years
and..."

"Times change, Honey.   Maybe she just saw the light."

"Could be.  Anyway, she said you were special."

"I am, Baby.  Never been a hoopier frode" (1)

"Wow.  But you sure look differant, though."

"Hey, Sweetmeat.  I'm one of a kind.  An original."

"Yeah, you seem to be, but what is that you are wearing."

"It is the latest 2003 streamline Boogie Shell."  (2)

"Oh?"

"Yes, they have improved it over last year's model.  It is more stream
lined for better dancing.  And the recessed buttons are more Catholic
school girl proof to prevent dangerous accidents."

"I see."

"Yes, with this I can dance as well as Fred Rogers and Ginger Astare
combined."   (3)

"Oh?"

"Yes, and after you see me dance you will just need to sample my
turtlemeat.   Heheheheheheheh."

"I will?"

"Yep, my little sugar plum.  Let me show you I press this button here
and.........whoooooooooooooooooa."

"Wow, I've never seen a turtle spin so fast, before.   Can you do
other tricks."

"Heeeeeeelllllllllllllllllllppppppppppppppp!"

"But for some reason, I just don't see myself wanting any...what did
you call it...turtlemeat?  Anyway, I just don't seem to be interested
in any meat at all now."

"Eeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrppppppppppppppp!"

"I don't think you should be pushing all of those buttons, Mr Gamera."

"Ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy,
Goooooooooooooodzillaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

"Neat. Jets.  Just like in the movies."

"Noooooooooooooooooo!  Not agaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin!"

Sound of breaking drywall.

"Hmmmmmmmm!"   Boop, boop, boop, beep.  "Hello, Katie.  This is
Mindy...Okay, I guess...Kenny just left...Yeah...Hey, Katie could you
maybe come over?...  Yeah...Bring some of that too...Oh, and that
strap-on you mentioned...Good.  See you, bye."

______________
Notes:
1) Okay, Hitchhikers fans and fannettes, how DO you spell frod, frode,
     froed, whatever.

2) Tip of the hat to Aquillae for this.  See "His Another Day, Another
     ASS*"
http://www.asstr.org/~ERui_Favorites/VBC/Another_Day_Another_ASS.htm

3) I know.  Don't bother writing.


