                         Disclaimer

This is piece of fiction.  Any imagined resemblance to
people living or deceased is either the result of dementia
on the reader's part or that the reader is, in fact, a
character of this story.   It is assumed that readers of
this story have the permission of the state, mom, dad, and
pastor and are able to tell the difference between real and
make-believe.  Furthermore, the writer is fully aware that
he is bound for hell, but welcomes both praise or/and well
thought out, humourous insults on his writing skill.  Note:
he already knows he cannot spell 'warth shet'.

The events and descriptions of this story are the sole
property of Kenny N Gamera and should not be recorded,
reposted, or profited from in anyway without express
written permission of the person hiding behind that pen
name. Reposting and free archiving will be tolerated given
the writer's name and address remains attached.  Archiving
by Deja.Com and ASSTR/ASSM is assumed and encouraged.

Thank You and Good Day,
Kenny N Gamera
turtlemeat69@hotmail.com

ftp://ftp.asstr.org/pub/Authors/Gamera
ftp://ftp.asstr.org/pub/Authors/Gamera/Beggars_Can't_Be

                Beggars Can't Be... Part 17
        The Rather Dull, Inaction Packed Conclusion
                            by
                      Kenny N Gamera

"Nervous?"
"Nope." I made an honest but doomed attempt at standing 
still.  "Organ music always makes me dance."
"Hold still, your tie is crooked."
"Yes'em."
I held still, and she straightened my tie.  Then, she 
brushed a little dander from the shoulder of my jacket.
"You look nice in a tuxedo."
"Thank you."
"Well you do.  We should dress you up more often."
"You'll get at least one other chance after this."
"Mmmmmm! I can hardly wait for that, but I think we ought 
to find other excuses."
I shook my head with a goofy grin plastered all over it.
"You ever think that we'd reach this point," I asked.
"Right from the very start."   The organist switched to the 
pomp, and the bride entered the doorway.  "Here she comes.  
Isn't she beautiful?"
"White suits her very well."
"It does."  She sighed.  "I can't wait for tonight."
"Steady, girl."
"Well, I can't."
"You're going to have to."  I decided to distract her.  
"Sherry looks nice in full dress."
"I like how all the medals draw attention to her chest."
"Brat."
"Yes, I am."  She looked up to me.  "She does have nice 
tits though."
"They're pleasant enough," I said, refusing to take the 
bait like the wily old veteran I hoped to someday become.
"More than, Mr. Gamera."  She sighed.  "Damn, that's a long 
aisle."
"All the better to show off."
"God, she's hot in that dress."
"Steady, girl."
"But I want her so bad."
"You'll get her."  I reached for her hand and squeezed it.  
"But not until the proper time."
I scanned the near empty church; my parents sat on the 
groom's side; Kim's of course were on the bride's side.  My 
sisters were there as well, with their husbands.  My family 
had a slightly dazed look but otherwise smiled.  They were 
happy but confused.  Much like me, but in their own way and 
for their own reasons.  And if their confusion were greater 
than mine, so was their happiness at being proved right at 
last that I would find someone.
A few others that we knew sat here and there, mostly along 
the aisle.  Everyone faced towards the back, except for 
those that the Sherry and her charge had passed.  Those had 
all turned to watch the pair progress closer to the altar 
where we waited.
The bride and Sherry neared the front and passed Jenny's 
cheerleaders, who giggled quietly but gleefully.  With them 
were what I found out was the chess club, who sat as if 
they hadn't the first clue about what was happening.  They 
passed the families.  The passed the first pews and stepped 
to the immediate front of the alter.
I looked at Kim.  A broken beam of light from a hole in the 
roof surrounded her for an instant.  She had never seemed 
more lovely than she did that summer day.  I turned away 
from the bride and to her lovely groom standing next to me.
"You are a very lucky woman, Jenny Smith."
"Yes, I am."  She gave my hand a squeeze before releasing 
it. "You're my next, you know."
"We'll worry about that latter, my future bigamist."  I 
reached around and kissed her cheek.  "Now, get married."
In front of friends and family, in an abandoned church, 
with me at her side as best man, Jenny Smith received Kim 
Wright from Officer Sherry Michaels.  Together, hand in 
hand, they stood before a woman dressed in a flowing white 
shift and flowers.  I was told that she was a practicing 
priestess in a pagan religion that I would add a mental 
"weird" in front of to modify.  Kim was extremely serious 
about it, but even Jenny appeared to be assumed by it in a 
way that she would never explain.
Sherry gave Kim's hand to Jenny who took it in a firm 
grasp.  Sherry clasped their joined hands with both of hers 
and lifted them to her lips.  She gently kissed their 
intertwined fingers.  Lowering her hands and releasing 
them, she stepped away to her place in the foremost pew, 
next to Kim's mother.  I saw a tear run down her cheek as 
she passed me.
Soon, they were announced to the world as women and wives.  
Jenny lifted Kim's veil and leaned over to kiss the woman 
with whom I would share her now and forever.  I stood and 
watched comfortably, even as their kiss passed through the 
truly necessary time and into something approaching enough 
already.
Sherry looked at me with a sly smirk from the front pew.  I 
shrugged at her.  We all waited and eventually the two of 
them came up for air.  The small group watching, Sherry, 
and I clapped.  The two blushed as the organist played the 
pomp again on her keyboard.  With this cue, they retreated 
out of the church.
We held the reception in at the State Park campground.  We 
rented a corner's worth of the sites and had taken over a 
chunk of the adjoining picnic area.  It was a weekday 
during a slow part of the summer, so no one complained 
about the occupation, especially when they found that they 
were invited.  It was an open woody area with mostly pines 
of some sort or another, which the cheerleaders had 
decorated with white flowers strung into garlands.
The priestess had wanted a sacrifice Jenny had thought that 
it wouldn't be necessary and that the goddess would 
understand with it being the twentieth century and all.  It 
had been the only disagreement during the planning stage.  
We had settled on a barbecue that my father took care of.  
He did suggest that I might grill cheese sandwiches if a 
burnt offering was necessary.  The rest was pot luck.
My father jokingly complained about the lack of booze, but 
hey...he should've thought of that before the grilled 
cheese thing.  Besides the cheerleaders kept him busy on 
the area we reserved for dancing.  I danced with the groom, 
the bride, the mother of the bride, and the mother's of the 
bride girlfriend.  The latter two pronounced me as being 
"okay for a guy."  I blushed.  
My mother got along surprisingly well, spending a good deal 
of time with the priestess discussing gardening.  My 
brothers in law talked hockey with Teresa's husband and 
Julio.  I caught one of my sisters slow dancing with 
Sherry.  The chess club got drinks for the cheerleaders and 
got a dance or two with either the girls or Teresa.
Jenny and Kim?
As I wrote, I had danced with each of them, but they had 
disappeared very early on.  Well, I went looking for them.  
They were together in the woods.  I went back to the 
reception.  Let's just say that I find closets 
uncomfortable and leave it at that.
              A Special Thank You and Good Day
To all of those who bothered to write about this story over 
the last two years, thanks.  Specifically and in no real 
order (and this should be everyone): Katie, Pat, "Julie," 
celia, Souvie, Virago Blue, Rui, Jay, Jon, Jerry, James, 
Ray, Robert, Doug, Morgan, Lord Shon, William, Pedro, 
denny, Hopeless Romantic, Jacobin, and Ol' Doc Fudd's 
Miracle Penis Enlarger and Viagra Substitute.  I hope you 
found it worth the bother.
Kenny
                    Coming Eventually:
              T'aint All Beer and Skittles...
Starring: Jenny, Sherry, Kimmy, Charlie Hitler,...and that 
Kenny guy too...I guess.
