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Tucky Seven -*- Copyright 1998 by Ellen Hayes.

Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual
persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when
used for satirical purposes.

This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and
possibly sex.  If you are legally not allowed to read materials
containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading
this.  I am not responsible.
Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it
in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally
allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish,
state, and country.

All rights reserved.  See the bottom for distribution rights.


Tucky Seven


***
06:07 26 May

     Life was really horrid, once my family moved without telling me and
I was stuck in girl clothes over at the Parkers.  They said they would
be foster parents, and I could live there, but I was stuck being a girl,
and it was like some kind of horrid nightmare...
     Which ended when the phone flash woke me up.  "Uh, 'lo?"
     "Val?"
     "Deb?"  I glanced at my watch.  "Are you okay?"
     "Yeah, I'M fine..."  Pause.  "You're working today, remember?"
     "Oh.... yeah, okay.  Yeah," I lied confidently.  "I just woke up."
     "Be there in half an hour?"
     "Uh."  I rubbed my face.  "'Kay."
     "Kisskiss," she said, and hung up.

***
06:34 26 May

     "Mornin'," she said, before sipping on a mug of coffee.
     "Mmmm."  I leaned over and got a kiss.  I was glad I'd brushed my
teeth, I really was.  "Can we go and do this instead of working?"
     She made a face at me, which had at least half of a smile in it.
"I wish."

***
06:52 26 May

     Rachel did not look pleased to see us.  "Uh," she mumbled, running
her hands through her hair.  "Yeah."  Without further neural activity,
she turned around and led us up the stairs, where she proceeded to fall
back into bed and ignore us completely.

***
07:26 26 May

     Freshly attired in one of the dresses we'd bought, with a bag full
of spare stuff like a book and a bathing suit - fat chance, I thought -
and SPF-barely-adequate sunblock, we arrived at the Parker residence.
     "Oh, God," I said softly.  "All summer?"
     "Let's hope," Debbie said optimistically as she turned off the car.
     We both got out and walked to the front door.  She glanced at me
after she knocked.  "Nervous?"
     "Some," I admitted before the door opened.  Miz Parker was dressed
way too casual for work, and she was sticking an earring in her ear as
she smiled at us.
     "Well, come on in..."  We did, Debbie shutting the door behind us
as we followed Miz Parker.  She added, "Ricky's been looking forward to
seeing you again, Valerie."
     "He has?"
     She turned back towards us and smiled some more.  "Apparently, in
his opinion, you're the best babysitter who ever lived."
     Debbie snorted.

***
07:29 26 May

     Apparently, Debbie and Miz Parker had decided that I was going to
be "evaluated", at least for part of the first day.  Oh, joy.
Especially since this was the first I'd been informed of it.
     "So, what do I do?" I asked.
     Miz Parker replied, "Well, Valerie, you've read the info, right?"
     "Uh, mostly.  Last week was kind of busy."
     "Would you like to read it again?" she didn't really ask.  Debbie
was already digging a copy out of her bag.

***
07:34 26 May

     It was pretty standard, though I think I wanted to make sure I had
a copy with me.  Just in case, say, Ricky knocked one of the toilets
loose and I had to shut off the water.  Or if there was a nuclear war
and I had to build a shelter for the kids until the parents got home.
     Debbie had been, one might say, a little more than thorough.
     "It's her first long term job," Debbie was explaining to Miz
Parker, who was feeding Stella the old fashioned way and gawking at
another copy of the dossier.  "I wanted to make sure she had everything
she needed to know."  Miz Parker looked at Debbie like Stella had sucked
a little too hard.
     "Um, how about if I fix breakfast?" I said to divert everyone's
attention.

***
07:56 26 May

     "Where did you learn to cook like that, Valerie?" Miz Parker asked
as she sipped on some coffee.
     "New York."  I was busy scrubbing eggs down into the disposal after
Ricky had tortured them and left them to dry.
     "New York," she repeated after a second.
     "Uh, yeah.  Well," I turned around to explain it better, "I mean,
my mom's sister, she told me I needed to learn to cook, so I spent a
summer or two up there cooking for her and my cousin."
     "My mom thinks she's great," Debbie said, and grinned at me.

***
08:38 26 May

     "Ricky, if I wanted to play basketball, I'd be playing it at
school."  Minus my five foot six handicap, of course.
     "Oh," he whined, "come on, just a little..."

***
08:45 26 May

     I heard Stella start to cry, or something, and turned to pay
attention to her and therefore missed the basketball being tossed to me.
Thud.
     Stella stopped crying and stared at me as I sat down rather
abruptly on the driveway.  Miz Parker and Debbie stared at me too.
     "Are you okay?" Ricky asked, a little too late.
     "Uh.  Yeah."  Duh.  Now I remembered why I didn't do this at
school.
     A car pulled into the tail end of the driveway, and as it stopped
the back doors opened and two kids flew out.  "Oh cool!"  "Basketball!"
     Oh, no.

***
08:47 26 May

        The two new kids were already playing basketball with Ricky as I
came over to see what was up.  The woman who I thought was the kids' mom
was walking up the driveway.  "Hi!" she waved.  "You must be the new
babysitter."
     Oooh, give the lady a prize.  "Yes ma'am, I'm Valerie."
     "I'm Cindy Upshaw, nice to meet you."  I stuck out my hand, and she
shook it.
     Miz Parker said, "This is Debbie, who runs half the business."
Debbie and Miz Upshaw shook hands too.
     Miz Upshaw turned to me and asked, "This is your first day?"
     "Well, sort of - I sat for Ricky during spring break, a couple of
months ago."  It felt more like a couple of years ago.
     "And you're going to be doing this all day, all summer long?"
     I wish she wouldn't put it quite like that.  It sounded like a jail
sentence.  "I hope so..."  Stella was looking like she was going to eat
a potted plant, and I wasn't sure if it was poisonous, so I nonchalantly
wandered over and scooped her up before she could get her little fists
around the leaves.  "I mean, the kids are cool, and it's more than I can
make at McDonalds or something."  There was a shriek from the basketball
court, and all four of us turned to look.

***
08:49 26 May

     I tied a small knot in the bandanna at the back of my head, then
straightened up to face Debbie's critical eye.  "Well?"
     "Good enough, gangsta girl," she grinned, and smacked me on the
shoulder.

***
08:51 26 May

     Gary tried once again to grab the ball as I dribbled, but I saw him
this time and snatched it away before he could grab it.  "Hey!" I
yelled, and passed it to Debbie, who dodged Ricky's kamikaze attack and
sank it through the basket.
     "No fair!" Ricky yelled.  "You're too tall!"  This was the first
time I'd been accused of THAT.

***
09:20 26 May

     I stared at the baby seat, and at the back seat of Debbie's car,
and at the baby seat, and at the back seat of Debbie's car-
     "Need some help?" Debbie asked.
     "No."
     I crawled in, and in about sixty seconds I had the baby seat locked
in place.  It would have been faster if someone hadn't stuffed the seat
belts back there about halfway to Seat-Cushion Siberia.
     When I crawled out, Debbie gave me this totally uncalled for nasty
look, and reached in and yanked.  She looked really surprised when the
seat failed to come out.  "Told you I'd get it," I said.
     "Good job," Miz Parker said, and I smirked at Debbie.

***
10:17 26 May

     I was warming up a bottle of formula, while Stella warmed up for a
good screaming session if I was thirty seconds over time.  Talk about
performance pressure.

***
10:19 26 May

     I shifted Stella a little bit, and glanced outside to make sure the
three boys weren't killing each other or anything else I should know
about.
     "So, just keep them occupied?" I asked.
     "Pretty much," Miz Parker agreed.  "Sometimes take them out to a
museum," yeah right, "or the park or something.  Just be sure to call
before you go, so I'll know where you are."
     "And leave a note saying where we went, what time we went, and what
time we expect to be back."  She smiled and nodded.  I wasn't a complete
moron.  I turned to Miz Upshaw and asked, "Um, do I need to call you
too?"
     She shook her head.  "I'll probably be sleeping.  I work nights at
the hospital, so...  Just call Beth, and if I need to know where they
are I'll call her."  Miz Parker nodded at that.
     "Um, and if I take them out, will I get reimbursed for expenses?"
They looked at each other.  "I can save the receipts," I offered.

***
10:49 26 May

     Miz Upshaw was looking like she was about to go to sleep.  Before I
could say anything, Miz Parker suggested, "Cindy, why don't you go home
and take a nap."
     Miz Upshaw sighed, and nodded, and got to her feet and left.

***
11:46 26 May

     Miz Parker looked at her watch, sighed, and admitted, "Well, I
guess I'd better get ready for work.  I said I'd be in for half a day
today."
     "You're not going to stay for lunch?" slipped out of my mouth. "I,
uh, I was making some for you, too..."
     She frowned, thinking.
     "What're we having?" Ricky asked, predictably.

***
12:05 26 May

     Ricky, Gary, and Davy looked at their plates, with custom loaded
hot dogs and home fries, which had been a pain to cut up and fry, and
then looked at our plates.  Miz Parker had said she wanted something
"light", and Debbie had seconded, and I was too fat already, so I'd
fixed baked potatoes with low-fat Italian dressing on 'em.  Miz Parker,
and Debbie, were looking at me like I was crazy.
     I was beginning to wonder myself.
     I think Debbie was about to say something reactionary about new
foods when Ricky pointed and said, "Can I have some of that?"
     "Please," dropped out of Miz Parker's mouth on autopilot.
     "Pleeeeeeeeeeze," Ricky groaned.
     "Sure, have a bite," I said back, and pushed my plate over to him.
He stabbed his fork into it, yanked a piece out, and stuck it in his
mouth.  "CoOf!" he mumbled.
     "Don't talk with your mouth full," three of us snapped as one.
     "Let me try!" Gary asked.  "Please," he added, catching on quick.

***
12:19 26 May

     I looked forlornly at my potato dish, currently being inhaled by
three starving young boys, and then down at the hot dogs I'd cooked.
     "Hey, Val, you gonna eat that one?" Debbie asked me, pointing at
mine.  She'd already inhaled hers.  Miz Parker had eaten a little
slower, but showed every sign of enjoyment.
     "I think she cooked a couple more, on the stove," Miz Parker said,
as she got up to get another one for herself.
     Go figure.  At least they were turkey franks.

***
12:42 26 May

     Another session of dish washing, while the boys were in the living
room watching television with Debbie.  Joy, joy.
     "Valerie?" Miz Parker asked.
     "Uh, yeah?"
     "If you don't have any other questions, then I guess I'll be going
to work.  I should be back around five thirty or six, but if David gets
home before I do, that's fine."
     "Okay, no problem.  Um, could you tell Debbie?  She's my ride home
today, and I'm a little..."  I waved a soapy, dripping arm.
     "I thought you had a car," she said, like she'd been tricked and
she wasn't pleased about it.
     "Well, sort of... I'm buying Debbie's old one, and she has to go
pick up her replacement car tonight, before I can get the Toyota.  So
I'll have it tomorrow," may it please all the gods great and small,
"just not quite yet."  Oh, God, I had to drive to work tomorrow, all by
myself.  Oh, God.

***
12:58 26 May

     Debbie said, "Val?"
     "Uh huh?"  I got to change all the diapers myself, today.  Oh,
whee, fun all the time around here.  Still, I was getting paid...
     "I was gonna go renew my pager contract today, before I went to
work, so I wondered if you wanted me to get you one too, so like if your
parents...."  She trailed off, letting me figure out the easy parts for
myself.
     "Um, how much?"
     "About ten a month."
     "Sure, no prob.  Just," I winked at her, "make sure it's black,
okay?  Not something like pink or green or something weird..."
     "Awww," she protested, smiling.
     "Oh, wait, make sure it's an alphanumeric, okay?"
     "Why?"  She looked puzzled.
     I shook my head.  "You know I got my geekosity from my dad, right?
He'd probably rather send e-mail than talk in person, and therefore not
bug me too much."
     "What's 'geekosity'?" Davy asked.

***
13:02 26 May

     Miz Parker came down the stairs, looking cheerful.  Stella looked
up, and Miz Parker came over, and Stella began to scream like I had just
pulled one of her toes off.
     "I swear I didn't do anything!"
     Miz Parker looked at me like I was deranged.  Stella screamed.
"Val, it's all right, she's eight months old, and she's figured out that
Mommie's leaving," she said sadly, looking at Stella.  Stella kept
screaming.  "She'll calm down in a few minutes, don't worry."  Debbie
nodded.
     Stella kept screaming like she was being slow-cooked.

***
13:07 26 May

     Miz Parker had been right, though it had taken an eternity instead
of the 'few minutes' she'd claimed.  So when Debbie said SHE was
leaving, I flinched.
     "Val, it's okay," she tried to reassure me, "I'll be back about six
thirty, okay?"
     "Okay," I sighed.  Then I looked around.  The boys were in the
living room, out of sight, and Stella would tell no tales.  So I reached
over and kissed Debbie.
     She smiled, and stood there smiling, until she finally said, "Don't
do that."
     "Okay," I grinned.
     "See ya at six thirty, huh?"
     Stella and I watched Debbie go.  I kept expecting Stella to start
screaming, but she didn't.

***
13:23 26 May

     Stella and I were sitting on the couch, playing with a little teddy
bear, when she got this look on her face which I already recognized.
     "Is she gonna cry again?" Gary asked.
     "She's hungry," Ricky stated.
     "Like you know!" Gary shot back.
     I stood up and told them, "Don't break anything until I get back,
okay?"
     Stella said, "Nnnnnnnn," like she had a rock in her shoe or
something.  Except she wasn't wearing shoes.
     Time was running out.

***
13:26 26 May

     Disaster number x plus one averted successfully.  She looked like
she was enjoying the rice cake that I'd snagged for her, since I was
supposed to be trying solids along with bottles.
     I feared for her - rice cakes were not food for human beings.  I'd
tried one once.  Styrofoam tasted better.  Or at least more.

***
13:39 26 May

     "Can we go swimming?" Ricky begged.
     "It's been an hour since we ate," Davy pointed out.
     "Two!" corrected Gary, who smacked Davy, who et cetera.
     I thought about it as the two of them yelled at each other.  The
problem was, I had to keep Stella around, and it was time for her nap.
But I also had to watch the kids-
     Sort of.  Aha.
     "Sure," I said loudly over the sound of two young boys trying to be
insulting to each other.  "Go change into your suits."
     All three ran off screaming.  Which, naturally, scared Stella and
she started to cry.
     I sighed.

***
14:01 26 May

     Stella was peacefully asleep in her baby packing crate, and every
so often I'd look out the window to make sure that all three boys were
floating and moving in the pool.  Not hard - it looked as though they
might just empty it if I left them in long enough.
     I checked the user's manual, and it said I should only let them
stay out two hours at a time.  That'd be... four, plus or minus.  Plus I
had to grab them again and re-goo them with sunblock so they'd stay raw
versus well done.  That'd be at three.
     I needed a laptop.  Or my synth.  This book thing wasn't going to
cut it all that long...

***
14:55 26 May

     Stella was snoozing on when my watch alarm went off.  I looked out,
and found three boys, still moving and things, and no blood.  No sweat.
     More sunblock, I remembered.

***
14:57 26 May

     "Aw come-"
     "Shhh!  If you wake this baby up I'll strap her to your head so she
can scream in your ear."  Gary looked doubtful but stopped arguing.  And
squirming.  With the result that he got a nice handful of goo slapped on
his shoulder blades.
     "Bleah!" he complained.  "It's cold!"
     "I know, but it'll warm up in a bit."  Maybe next time I should
leave it outside.  I smoothed it all over him, making sure to get his
legs - the time Susan got her legs sunburned was sort of hilarious,
because she couldn't wear anything on her legs for two days, so she
spent it in a nightgown cursing a lot.  A SHORT nightgown.
     On the other hand, she cried herself to sleep the first night, that
I heard.  So I made sure that Gary got an even coat, all over.

***
15:52 26 May

     I was in the kitchen fixing a snack for me and the boys, when they
attempted to come inside.
     "Don't come in here!"  They froze.  "You're dripping on the floor!
Get back outside and get those towels!"  Morons.  That's why I brought
towels outside in the first place.

***
16:01 26 May

     "Zhhzz guh," Davy commented.
     "Thanks, don't talk with your mouth full."
     "Rrrrrr," he complained.
     "Bbbb," Stella added from my lap, and put her teddy bear in her
mouth.
     "Don't eat your friend, there, Stella, he might not like you any
more," I told her as I gently maneuvered it back out.  She stuck it back
in.
     Hint hint.

***
16:09 26 May

     I was having loads of fun playing "Stick the Spoon in the Mouth"
with Stella - and losing - when the phone rang.  I vaguely recalled that
I was supposed to answer it, so I secured the pureed goo and got up.
"Hello, I mean Parker residence may I help you?"  Bugger.
     "Valerie?"  It was some guy.  "This is David Parker," the other
boss, oh great.  "I was, uh, calling to say I'd be a bit late, about six
thirty tonight-"
     "Oh, um, Miz Parker said that's when she would be back too."
     "Alright."  He paused for a second.  "Could you order some pizza or
something for dinner, since Beth won't have time to cook?"
     "Um, sure, uh," I did not have enough cash to feed two adults and
three boys on delivered pizza.  Oh, shit.  "I'll get something," I
finally said lamely.

***
16:15 26 May

     I decided that I was losing the battle with Stella, and she didn't
look that interested in din-din anyway.  I could see her point - it was
pretty nasty looking.  So I started thinking about what to do for food.
     "You know," I told Stella as I hauled her around the kitchen
patting her back, "there's plenty of food here..."

***
16:32 26 May

     "Are you fixing dinner?" Ricky asked from behind me.
     I bit down on the instant reply - No, I'm getting ready to cook
your little sister - and turned around and nodded.
     "You can cook?" he asked, like he didn't believe it, like I hadn't
done this for him before now several times.
     "Yes, Ricky, I can cook," I sighed.
     "Can we stay for supper?" Gary asked.

***
17:05 26 May

     I sighed as I saw the carnage they had wreaked upon the living
room.  "Guys," I said, and they looked up from building a fort - or
something - out of seat cushions.  "C'mere for a second."
     They assembled in front of me like they were gonna get yelled at.
It was tempting.
     "You know, your moms want someone to sit for you the whole summer,
right?"  They nodded.  "Ricky's mom picked me.  Now, today is sort of a
test day, see?  To see if I can deal with you, and you can deal with
me.  Got that?"  They nodded warily, like there was a trick in here
somewhere.
     "So," I continued, "if you guys want me to come back, then I gotta
look like I'm doing well, okay?  Now, what do your folks usually say
when you make a pillow fort?"
     "It's not a fort it's a-" Davy started to explain before Ricky
smacked him on the shoulder.
     "Yell at us," Gary answered sadly.
     "I figured.  So, they'd yell at everyone if they see a pillow fort
when they get here.  Me included.  Gary, Davy, do you know when your
folks are supposed to get here?"
     They looked at each other, then Gary said, "Five or something."
     "It's five now.  So, if you could put everything back the way it
was, then maybe the parents will want me to come back tomorrow, and you
can build a fort when we don't have to worry about them coming home,
okay?"
     Ricky gasped, "That's it?"
     "What's it?"
     "You're not gonna yell at us?" Gary confirmed.
     Davy added, "Or ground us or take away the TV or-" until Ricky and
Gary both smacked him on the back at the same time.
     Don't give authority figures hints on punishments.
     "No, I won't.  Not if you get everything fixed so I don't get
yelled at, okay?"  I remembered something.  "Ricky can tell you, I'm
pretty cool."
     "Huh?" Ricky said.  Thank you, Genius Boy.
     "Falling into a mud pit?" I prompted.  His face fell.  "And finding
your Micro Racer?"
     "You and Mom yelled at me."
     "You could have gotten ME in trouble too.  But I got you cleaned
up, AND found it for you.  Didn't I?"
     "Yeah," he forced out like it hurt.
     "So, if you want someone who's crazy enough to play basketball with
you little monsters," they liked that, "and let you build pillow forts
or whatever, then you gotta make me look good, which means you gotta
LOOK like angels when your folks get here.  Right?"
     "Yeah."  "Okay."
     Ricky asked me, while staring directly into my eyes, "Can we build
the base tomorrow?"  Gary and Davy got identical looks on their faces,
from which I deduced it was supposed to be a secret base.
     "If Miz Parker, Ricky's mom, wants me to come back tomorrow, and
she's not here, then yeah, you can build whatever it is."
     "Cool!"
     And, by God, they ran off and started disassembling it.

***
17:09 26 May

     I was feeling pretty full of myself, right up until the point I
burned myself on a pot, and I got to dance around holding my mouth shut
against all the awful things I wanted to say but didn't dare in case one
of the boys heard a new word and tried it out later.
     "Bugger," is what I finally gasped out when I remembered cold
water.
     "Buh," said Stella, and giggled.

***
17:38 26 May

     I very carefully spooned ground beef into the sauce, hoping against
hope that none of it would splash out and get on this dress.  Or the
stove.  Or the wall.  Or the ceiling.
     Amazingly, if any did, I didn't see it.  Which was just about as
good as nothing happening at all.

***
17:44 26 May

     The sauce was on simmer, and all three of the boys were clustered
around plans for a secret base that I didn't know anything about,
nosiree, when the doorbell rang.
     "It's Mom," Gary said as he ran to answer the door.  I was a step
behind him, since I had to make sure that Stella was not going to
skydive off the couch in the next five seconds.  I couldn't catch him in
time, natch.  And I was the one that was supposed to open the door.
     It was his mom, naturally.
     "Hi Mom!"  "Hi Mom," Davy called as him and Ricky stuffed plans
into a backpack.  
     "She is really neat, Mom," Davy explained.
     Ricky added, "And she's cooking dinner and everything," which
reminded me to check my watch to time things.  Time for veggies.

***
17:46 26 May

     "Mmm, thus us gud," she mumbled as she sipped on a spoon.
     "Don't talk with your mouth full, Mom," Davy said with a snigger.
     The glare she gave him drove him back towards the living room.
     "So, what gave you the idea to fix dinner?  By the way, it looks
delicious."
     "Um.  Well, Mister and Miz Parker both said they were going to be
late, and Mister Parker said to get pizza, except I didn't have enough
money for that, so I figured if I cooked dinner, that'd be better than
nothing at all."
     She nodded.  "Good thinking."
     I hoped Mister and Miz Parker would agree with her.

***
18:02 26 May

     Miz Parker's sister, who I could NOT remember the name of any more,
had been 'talking' to me about school and such, meaning an interrogation
like Debbie's mom probably gave when nobody was looking.  Except, of
course, I wasn't being beaten with rubber hoses or anything like that.
Nothing that would leave marks.  Or evidence.
     "Um, no, I don't have a boyfriend right now.  I, uh, with finals
and everything..."  *LEAVE THIS TOPIC IMMEDIATELY!* I telepathically
beamed at her as hard as I could.
     "Oh, sure," she nodded, "I can understand."  *Whew-*  "So do you
have anyone in mind for a mindless summer romance?" she grinned.
     My telepathic powers were woefully underdeveloped, I decided.  "Um,
I dunno, we'll have to see how it turns out, I'm pretty busy it seems
like..."

***
18:09 26 May

     Miz Whatsername had left, leaving me and Ricky and Stella, along
with dinner.
     "I'm hungry," Ricky said, predictably.  Actually, the smell was
enough to drive me crazy too.
     "Me too.  Hey, if you could set the table, then I wouldn't have to
stop cooking to get it, and we could eat faster."
     He gave me a look, and asked, "It's not gonna work."
     "What?"
     "I'm not five any more," he stated.
     I looked over at him.  "I never said you were."
     Pause.
     He sighed, deeply, and trudged over to the cabinets, where he began
taking plates out.

***
18:14 26 May

     Some whacko impulse, prompted by some anchorwoman on TV, had me in
the bathroom going over my makeup.  Large amounts of it had worn off
during the day, though I hadn't noticed.  Weird.

***
18:32 26 May

     Now I was having a bad case of hindsight, where you start thinking
you should have done things differently.  In my case, it was
concentrating on dinner: I should've gotten pizza, I should've had some
more cash on me, I should've been more prepared, I should've made sure
the house was clean, I should've...
     "Can we eat?"
     "Not until your folks get home."
     "I'm starving!"
     "Me too.  And I have to go home to eat, first."
     He sighed deeply, as if my problem could in any way compare with
his.

***
18:35 26 May

     Ricky's head popped up at some signal I missed.  "Dad's home!" he
yelled as he launched towards the kitchen.
     "Go wash your hands!" I yelled at him, and he deflected in
mid-flight towards the downstairs bathroom.
     I stood up, controlling my impulse to run screaming or hide under
furniture, and several eternities later, Mister David Parker, Esquire
I'm sure, came in through the garage door.  "Oh, hel-"  He sniffed.
"Hello, Valerie.  I, take it you didn't get pizza."
     Oh, shit.  "I, um, well, I didn't have enough money to get pizza,
so I-"
     "DAD!" shrieked a small flying mammal as it flew across the kitchen
floor and into Mister Parker's leg.  "Guess what?  Valerie cooked
dinner!"  Valerie was wondering if she would have a job tomorrow.

***
18:41 26 May

     He hadn't told me to get lost, which was good.  He hadn't told me
it was a clever idea, which was not so good.
     I was holding Stella, since I had no more fingernails and I was
about to start eating the tips of my fingers, when the door to the
garage opened again, and Miz Parker came through it.  "Hi Valerie," she
said.  And sniffed.

***
18:48 26 May

     "Oh, Valerie, it's all right," Miz Parker told me as I carried a
large pot of sauce to the table.  "You did great!  And it smells
delicious."
     "Thanks... uh, I wrote down everything I used, so you don't have to
worry about running out of something."  It was a little stained, but I
thought it was still readable.
     She stopped, and after I put the pot down on the potholder, I
looked back to see what I had done wrong this time.
     Then the doorbell rang.

***
18:50 26 May

     "Ricky!" Miz Parker called.  "Could you come here for just a
minute?"
     Debbie glanced at me as we all stood around in the hallway waiting
for Ricky, and I shrugged.  I had no idea what she was up to, actually.
     Ricky finally arrived, still chewing.  "Nuh?" he sort of breathed
through his nose.
     "Last chance, kiddo.  Do you want Valerie to come back for the
summer?"
     He started swallowing frantically and nodding.  I thought he was
going to choke on something, but he got his throat clear before he
started yelling, "YES!  Oh, please Mom, she is so cool-"
     "Okay!" she laughed, then turned back tomorrow.  "If you'd like to,
I think you're hired."
     "I'll take it," I said in sort of a daze.

***
18:54 26 May

     "Jeez, what a day," I mentioned as we slid into Debbie's car.  "How
did your day go?"
     "Pretty good.  Um, I got you a BLACK pager," she emphasized,
handing me a small box.  "It should be turned on already, and all the
info is in there."  She sighed as she started the car.  "Anyway, the
drink selling stuff went okay, we got about six hundred dollars today,
gross.  Not too bad.  I still gotta drop off the bank bag.  And we have
to go get the car and stuff, if you can wait?"
     "Yeah, but I might starve to death first."
     She took a deep breath.  "Yeah, me too, but Mom wants to do dinner,
just me and her, tonight.  I think she misses me," she grinned.
     "I know I did!" I said.

***
19:12 26 May

     I knocked, and after a minute, Terri opened the door.
     "Uh, hi, is Rachel home?" Debbie asked.
     "Um, lemme check... RACHELLLLLLL?!" she shrieked back into the
townhouse.

***
19:14 26 May

     "Anyway, I got you a key, okay?" Rachel said, handing it to me.
"So you don't have to wake me up in the morning.  I don't think I could
take that every day."
     "Um, thanks, I think."
     "Oh, no problem, I mean, I trust you, it's just, I'm not at my best
at seven in the morning."  She smiled at me, I guess so I wouldn't feel
so bad.  It didn't work.

***
19:22 26 May

     "See you tomorrow," Rachel waved as she shut the door.
     "Come on, I wanna go get my car," Debbie grinned, pulling on my
arm.
     "Okay, I'm coming already!"
     "Oh, hold on," she said as she stopped and yanked me backwards.
"Now I can-" and she planted a big fat kiss right on my lips.
     I wasn't gonna say no.

***
19:38 26 May

     "Maybe you should call your folks," Debbie mentioned as we pulled
into the bank.
     "Oooh, maybe that would be a-"  She handed me a cellular phone.
"What?!  When did you get THIS?"
     She laughed and laughed.  "I got it same place your pager came
from.  I kinda needed one; they just offered me this fantastic deal on
one.  And, my old pager number still pages it."
     "It's got a pager?"
     "It's got a pager," she confirmed.  "Just, if I don't call you back
right away, don't get upset.  Sometimes I get busy."
     "Yeah, me too.  Okay..."  She lifted out this huge bank bag and
stuck it into the drawer.

***
19:40 26 May

     "They want me to come home for supper too," I mentioned as I turned
the phone off.  "Something about having a family dinner out or
something."
     "Maybe it's a subliminal message or something.  'You WILL spend
quality time with your offspring tonight.'"
     "But where from?"
     "Television, where else?"
     "I don't think TV is hi-res enough to do sublims effectively."
     She gave me a look like, yeah right and I have this bridge to sell
you too.

***
19:58 26 May

     Debbie danced as she came out of the guy's house holding a set of
keys and some papers.

***
20:21 26 May

     "It's mine, mineminemine-"
     "Cool," Amy said, looking over it.  Debbie was dancing around her
new used car, like we were around mine.  Mine mine mine mine....

***
20:46 26 May

     "I thought you weren't ever going to babysit again," Mom brought
up.
     "I, I dunno, maybe we were doing something wrong or something.
They were a lot easier to control this time.  Or maybe nine's a
difficult age or something."  I shrugged.
     "It was for you," Susan mentioned, and I mimed throwing a roll at
her.  Amy snorted.

***
21:37 26 May

     Home at last, in a soft pair of sweatpants and a t shirt, with no
children besides my brother.  Ahhh.
     "Whatsup?" I asked as I stuck my head in Susan's room.
     "Just yakkin'," Amy replied.  "Come on in."
     I wandered in and sat on the bed.
     Pause.
     "What are you smiling about?" Susan finally asked.
     "A, no kids, and b, I'm hired.  And c, I've got my own car..."
Mine mine mine mine-
     Amy added, "And d, you've still got Debbie's polish on your toes."
     Susan and I both looked, and Susan almost detonated without
actually moving or saying anything.

***
21:38 26 May

     I sat there on the bed, watching Susan scrub frantically at my toes
with cotton balls.
     "Susan, it's not that big a deal-"
     "Mom and Dad would FREAK if they saw this, Tuck!"
     Amy said, "Suze, don't you think you're exaggerating a little?  I
think I want to paint my boyfriend's toenails when I get back to New
York," she giggled.  "It's so cute!"
     Susan huffed at me.  "It's not my fault!" I protested.  "I was
minding my own business, and then she came at me..."

***
21:40 26 May

     Amy had finally opened the window before we all asphyxiated from
the acetone fumes.  As she sat back down, she asked, "So now that you
have a car, you can take me places, right?"
     "When I'm not working," I told her.  "And before you ask, no you
can't come over and help.  Debbie wants everyone to be paid if they
help, and anyway Miz Parker said no visitors at all no none nada."  And,
I didn't add, you might bring up delicate topics like "What the HELL are
you doing dressed like that?!"
     "Awwww," she complained.
     "Oh, God," I mentioned, "I gotta get up again and do this
tomorrow."
     "So what time will you get off, when you don't have to do Debbie's
errands too?" Susan asked.
     "Um.  I dunno."  Zip over to Rachel's, change, probably...  "About
seven, I think.  Depending on what time they get home," I amended.
"They were both pretty late today, which is one reason I got home so
late."
     "Brian was SO pissed when your folks said we had to wait for you,"
Amy stuck in.  Susan giggled.

***
21:42 26 May

     "So how was YOUR first day?" I asked Susan.
     She nodded.  "Pretty cool, I guess.  Kinda busy..."
     "Didja get any cool stuff?" Amy asked.  "Like concert tickets?"
     I added, "I need some bumper stickers for my car."  Susan stuck her
tongue out at both of us.

***
22:02 26 May

     I slipped into bed, regretting the necessity of being alone, but
with my new owner's manual to keep me company.  Mine, mine mine mine
mine...

***


"I got six, that's all there is..." - Schoolhouse Rock


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"Tallyho!"      \   /     @>--,--'--  ehayes@nym.alias.net  + vicki .sig
Ellen Hayes --=(*)=(*)=-- Renaissance Woman    ==[--------  + virus 9.1a
            http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/Heights/5734/



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