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Reach Out And Tuck Someone -*- Copyright 2002 by Ellen Hayes.

Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual
persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when
used for satirical purposes.

This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and
possibly sex.  If you are legally not allowed to read materials
containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading
this.  I am not responsible.
Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it
in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally
allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish,
state, and country.

All rights reserved.  See the bottom for distribution rights.


Reach Out And Tuck Someone


***
11:35 17 Aug

     "You think he didn't catch it?" I asked once the doors were all
shut.
     Kim cranked the engine until it lit, then answered, "Yeah, I think
he missed it.  Entirely."
     "He was a lot more freaked out over those two girls," Jill
snickered.
     "How could he have missed me?"
     "Jeezus, Val, look in the mirror," Jill complained.  "You don't
even look like you're wearing makeup."
     I checked, and she was sort of right.  "You think?"
     "YES!" they both yelled.
     "He would'a spazzed if he had," Kim assured me.
     "Yeah...  You're right," I decided.  Sort of.

***
11:57 17 Aug

     Jill waved before she dashed off to work, and then it was just me
and Kim.
     I sighed at the same time Kim did.
     "Wanna come help me cook Sunday dinner?" I asked her.
     "Um..."
     "And you and Mike could discuss character stuff while we're there,"
I suggested.  "I just gotta go to the store first."
     "Oh, right," Kim said, and dug in her purse for a while, finally
coming up with an envelope.  "Speaking of your pay..."

***
13:48 17 Aug

     "This?  For ONE pair of shoes?" Mom inquired, looking sick.
     "You can call and ask them for pricing if you don't believe me,
Mom.  I was kind of sickened myself, but..."  I shrugged.  "They're
working really well so far.  And they should last the entire year.  And
I was wondering, do I get paid back for used cookbooks we don't have
yet?"
     "Wh-  Let me see them," Mom decided.

***
18:10 17 Aug

     I hadn't ever done a roast before, but Mom gave some tips, and the
rest of it was straightforward.  And it had turned out pretty well, too,
judging by the way it was disappearing.
     Well, I mean, I liked it too, but I was sometimes not in tune with
everyone else, gustatorily (SAT word) speaking.

***
19:15 17 Aug

     I sighed, as my friends and I sat around the porch and digested.  I
knew that I would have Sundays off anyway, but the fact was that
tomorrow was School and School was Bad, because my vacation and my
theoretical freedom was over until next summer.
     And I still had to take the trash out, that being one of the new
chores I'd signed up for.
     *Inna minute,* I decided.

***
20:09 17 Aug

     Things had broken up, and so I was busy emptying trash cans into a
large bag when Mike waved at me.  "Ready for tomorrow?"
     "Argh!" I complained, almost grabbed my chest before I remembered
why that was a Bad Idea, and instead just slumped to the floor and faked
a convulsion.
     "Good deal," he said calmly, "that oughta get you out of English
class a few times."
     "Oh ghu," I sighed, then got back up.  "I hate English."

***
22:17 17 Aug

     "Aren't you going to bed?" Susan asked when she got my attention
and I pulled the headphones off.
     "I have to study some ASL," I said.  "They're testing me tomorrow
to get out of another year of German.  If I pass the ASL test..."
     "Oh, right," Susan nodded in recollection, having done the same
thing a few years ago.  "Why didn't they do it Friday?" she asked.
     "Dunno," I shrugged.  "Maybe the tester was somewhere else?  I know
they don't have anyone there at McAllen who can do it."
     She nodded at that, but warned, "Don't stay up too late, okay?  You
should be well-rested before you get in there, so you don't start
spelling everything badly in frustration."
     "Thanks for the vote of confidence, Suze," I sighed.
     She came over and ruffled my hair.  "I mean it, don't stay up too
late," she repeated.

***
23:00 17 Aug

     I looked at the time, and it was close enough that I should go to
bed, so I put my ASL stuff away, made SURE I had those breast forms
someplace secure where I could remember not to take them inside school
with me, made sure I also had the directions to Stella's sitter and
Ricky's school to take with me, and got up to go lie down.

***
06:00 18 Aug

     "Oh god, shut that stupid thing off!" Susan complained as I tried
to do just that.
     "Take the Mac," I told myself.  "Tomorrow." I countered.

***
06:19 18 Aug

     I was going to have to buy some new clothes; my old ones were
getting a little tight around the middle.  *Damn fat,* I thought,
irritated, and resolved to lose a few pounds.
     I wished I could lose it off the top-front too, but that was
apparently going to have to wait until some more doctors, or something,
and I could wear a button-up shirt open over the T shirt to camouflage
things.  And I was going to.

***
06:54 18 Aug

     Kim looked about as enthusiastic as she had Friday, which was not
at all, as she sipped her coffee.  Jill looked happier, though.
     "Why was I taking this class again?" I asked Jill as I sat down
next to her.
     "You're madly in love with me and couldn't stand to be away from me
for an instant," Jill said.
     "Uh.  Yeah, that explains why this is the only class I have with
you, right," I nodded, and she grinned at me.  "Oh, hey, I brought you a
save plate from dinner last night," I told her.  "It's in a cooler in my
car."
     "You did?"  I nodded.  "For real?"  I nodded again.  "Oh, man,
thanks!" she said as she hugged me.  "I didn't pack a lunch this
morning; I was hoping-"
     "Do you two HAVE to be cheerful?" Kim groused.

***
06:56 18 Aug

     I was accidentally looking up when Shannon came in, which might
have been a mistake because when we accidentally made eye contact she
gave me a nasty look and said something under her breath which was
probably 'faggot'.
     I thought about replying directly, but I'd have had to say it too
loud to make sure she'd hear it, so I just smiled back, and waved, and
said to Jill, "These cheerleaders are so rude."
     Jill looked at me speculatively - Kim just stared into her coffee
like she had been doing - and asked, "Yeah, I've noticed that.  Any, uh,
ideas, on how to change their attitudes?"
     "Not yet," I admitted.

***
08:01 18 Aug

     "You DID take, uh, those THINGS out of your pack, right?" Mike
confirmed.
     "Oh yeah," I sighed.  "Double checked last night and this morning
both."  He nodded, looking satisfied.
     "Eugene!" complained Mrs. Vangormer.
     "Here!" I called.  Why the hell we had to do it out loud for her,
when she should have known who we were already, was beyond me entirely.
Maybe she liked bothering people.
     At least, the schedule being strange the way it was, I would only
see her every other day, since cosmetology was going to be my 'homeroom'
every other day, so we could work harder in the lab.  I was overjoyed at
this not at all.

***
08:03 18 Aug

     She hung up the phone and said, "Eugene Tucker?  You're wanted in
the principal's office.  Now."
     "What?!"  I couldn't believe it.  "I just GOT here, I haven't even
had TIME to do anything wrong!"
     "Don't argue with me or you'll get detention!" she shrilled, "I've
heard about you!"
     Not enough, obviously.  She was going to regret this.

***
08:09 18 Aug

     "Just that I have to take that ASL test today," I told the guys as
I sat back down for a moment.  The only reason I'd come back is because
I hadn't taken my pack with me, which had probably been a minor mistake
on my part.  "And when, which is in five minutes.  At least it's instead
of study hall."
     "And, at least you're not in trouble yet," Dan said.
     "This is true," I admitted.
     "You studied, right?" Mike confirmed.

***
08:15 18 Aug

     I showed back up around the offices about the time the bell rang
again.  This was not my favorite place to be, but I did want to get out
of German this year.  Well, all future years, really.
     I finally swam through the crowd to the receptionist's desk and
handed her my note.  "That way, room four," she said as she pointed, and
I got quickly out of the way before someone ran over me.
     I went over to room four, and there was Dobson for some reason,
standing around like he was waiting for me.  "Ah, Eugene," he said.
     "Good morning," I said politely.  "How come you're not our homeroom
teacher any more?"  He waved towards the principal's office.  "Oh,
right.  D-darn," I sighed.
     "Please try not to cause Mrs. Vangormer as much trouble as you gave
me," he asked wearily.
     "Me?  Trouble?"
     He ignored that, and opened the door and motioned me in.  I went,
cautiously, and found a woman in a light sweater and skirt, who signed,
<Hello,> as she said, "Haayuh," which told me she was just about
completely deaf from a very young age.
     <Hello,> I signed back.  <I am E-U-G-E-N-E T-U-C-K-E-R.>  I looked
at Dobson, who showed no sign of leaving, and asked, <Do you want me to
speak and hear for you?>
     <For a little while,> she signed, and so I spoke it.
     "If you don't mind?" Dobson asked.  "Eugene?"
     I was halfway through signing my own name before I realized he was
talking to me.  "Uh, no, that's alright," I said, signing at the same
time.
     She signed at me, <Have a seat,> and she pointed at the seat in
front of the desk.
     <Thank you,> I said formally, and sat down.
     <How are you today?>
     <I'm not bad, for the first day of school.  I'd rather still be on
vacation,> I admitted.
     <Me too!> she agreed, smiling.

***
08:21 18 Aug

     She turned and said to Dobson, "Thank you," in that weird way deaf
people talk, if they've worked on it.
     Dobson nodded, then turned to me and said, "Eugene, when you're
done, you will both need to come by my office for a moment."
     I translated that, she said, "Okay," or the rough equivalent, and
he got up and left, shutting the door behind him.
     <You can stop translating now,> she signed at me.
     <Good,> I sighed.  <Doing both at once is kind of hard.>
     <I bet it is,> she agreed.  <Do you have a dog?>
     <Not at home, no.  We had one for a long time,> I told her, <but we
had to put her to sleep, three years ago.  Her kidneys failed and we did
not want to, T-O-R-T-U-R-E,> I spelled out, <her by making her go
through all the treatment.  Lots of needles and stuff, and she would
never get better, you know?>
     <That's too bad,> she sympathized.  <I have two dogs of my own
right now,> she said.
     <What kind, or B-R-E-E-D?> I asked.

***
08:55 18 Aug

     We'd had a not terribly great conversation - not that bad, I guess,
but it wasn't that great either - about everything from the weather to
what classes I liked and what I was going to do in college, and she'd
been taking notes every now and again.  It sort of reminded me of a
therapy session except this woman would let something alone, until she
put her pen down, smiled, and scared the crap out of me.
     "Okay, good enough," she said.  Out loud.  Like a hearing person.
     I stuttered for a second, then said, <I thought you were deaf!>
     "No, my sister's deaf," she corrected.  "I'm just really good at
imitating deafness."
     <No joke,> I agreed, still a bit startled.
     "You can speak now," she smiled again.
     I cleared my throat.  "Uh.  Um, so, did I pass?"
     "I think so," she said, to my immense relief.  "How did you learn
to sign so well?"
     "Uh, well, I learned to speak really late, comparatively, so they
put me in the hearing and speech special class where we lived, it was
all one group so I was around deaf kids a lot, and I, I sort of kept up
with it.  My sister and parents did the same thing, 'cause I picked up
ASL a little faster than I picked up English, I mean speaking it and
understanding it."  I shrugged.  I think Dad had thought I was going to
be retarded or something, judging now by the way he'd spent so much time
practicing with me then.

***
08:58 18 Aug

     "What?" Dobson asked, looking aggrieved to see me again.  "Oh," he
said, sounding much less unhappy when he saw Miz Ellison behind me.
     "He's demonstrated very satisfactory proficiency," she said as she
handed him some forms.
     "Very good," he said, turning to his computer, which probably
didn't have a goat's head on it any more, and typed some stuff, in an
agonizingly slow manner.  I was tempted to offer to type it for him, but
he knew better than to let me do that, I think.
     "So," he said as a printer spooled up and groaned, "I'll have your
revised schedule printed in a minute, but you're getting out at two,
rather than taking another class, correct?"
     "Yeah," I grinned happily, and then couldn't restrain myself and
did a little jig.

***
09:02 18 Aug

     The shove would have vectored me into some lockers if it had
connected, but I was 'up' and looking around, so I managed to dodge it
barely.  Close enough.  The growled, "Get outta the way, faggot," from
some senior-sized asshole was sort of gratuitous after the shove.
     Back to school.

***
09:06 18 Aug

     "Eugene Tucker?" called the teacher, and several people laughed.
     "Here," I sighed.  I hated this part.

***
09:55 18 Aug

     I had Mister Alston for English again, and I was supposed to be
nice to him, I remembered, but I didn't remember why.  I hoped that this
English class wouldn't be as hard as my last one, but I wasn't hopeful.
Literature was not my favorite subject.

***
09:56 18 Aug

     "Eugene Tucker?" Mister Alston called, and several people laughed.
*Law of nature,* I thought as I admitted that I was indeed here.

***
10:44 18 Aug

     It was a pleasant surprise, not, to find that Sabrina and Amanda
were in the same government class as me and Mike.  Well, it wasn't a
surprise, anyway.
     "Outta German!" I told Mike, and he slapped my hand and grinned.
     "Hey," Sabrina called as I waved at her, and she waved us over.
"What did you do to Tom Lenich this weekend?" she asked me.  "I want to
hear your side of it."
     "Ho ho!" Mike laughed.
     *Oh no,* I sighed to myself, but the bell rang, so I had to dash
for a seat, so I said, "Tell ya at lunch," and dashed.  Unfortunately,
the only ones left were in the front row, where Sabrina was.

***
11:32 18 Aug

     "On second thought," I told Sabrina, "call me after eight tonight
and I should be home, we can talk then, okay?"
     "Ooookay," she agreed.  "Why so late?"
     "I'm sitting Ricky and Stella after school, still," I told her.
"And cooking dinner for them."
     "You ARE?" she asked as she packed up her books.  "I wanna hear
this!"
     "Hear what?" Amanda asked.

***
11:34 18 Aug

     "Oh, wait, I need to get food for Jill," I said, "outside in the
car."
     "Why didn't you bring it inside before school?" Mike asked.
     "Would you shut up?"

***
11:35 18 Aug

     "Are you going to lunch or something?" Kelly asked from behind me
as I pushed the door open.
     "Huh?  No, I have some save plates I need to get," I said, holding
it so he could come out.
     "So, like, what's it like?"
     "What's what like?"
     "Gaming...  I never did it with anyone before," he admitted.
     "Never?  Man, it can be SO cool," I grinned.

***
11:39 18 Aug

     "Uh oh," I said, spotting someone I did not want to run into in a
parking lot.  And he looked around and saw me and hurriedly got off the
car he'd been leaning on.  Well, it was more emphatic, like he suddenly
remembered something he wanted to do.  "Kelly, get Mike right now," I
ordered as I put the cooler down, and moved off so Kelly wouldn't get
caught in the zone.  "Go!" I hissed.
     "You little shit, I'm gonna kill you," Lenich informed me as I took
steps to prevent exactly that.  Unfortunately, he was between me and the
buildings, and I didn't see any teachers in the area.
     The new sneaks did pretty well on the asphalt, though.
     *And adults wonder why kids bring guns to school,* I sighed to
myself as I desperately tried to conjure one into my hands so I could
shoot Lenich with it.  He seemed rather eager to get me, not bothering
with the cooler at all but keeping up with me even through the maze of
parked cars.  I was trying to head around him for the fourth or so time
when I heard this sort of "Ooof!" of contact, and immediately thought,
*Oh shit he got Kelly,* and popped up to see if I could at least
distract him, maybe even blindside him and take him from behind-
     Except it was Kelly crouched down and rocking from impact, and
someone else making the noise.  And no Tom in sight, but I could hear
him, and he was now apparently exceptionally pissed with Kelly but not
really able to talk about it at the moment.
     As I continued running, I stuck my fingers in my mouth and whistled
sharply to get Kelly's attention, which I did, and then motioned towards
the buildings.  He nodded, and then I was back at the cooler and pack so
I snatched those and turned around to check for Kelly - still there,
still moving - and Tom - just starting to get up - and waited for Kelly
so we could provide close support for each other.
     "Whafuck?" Kelly asked as we departed.
     "That's the fuckhead that hit m- a girl I know, this weekend, and
so I kicked his ass for it then," I panted as we made it to the door.
We went in, and I added, "I think he's kind of resentful about it."

***
11:42 18 Aug

     "So," Mike said as we caught up with our little gaming group, me
keeping a watch for Debbie ahead as well as Tom behind - it would be too
ironic if I was watching behind me for Tom and ran headlong into Debbie,
so I HAD to be careful.  "Got lunch?"
     "Yeah," I said.
     "What else happened?" Mike asked.
     "Kelly rescued my ass," I grinned.

***
11:44 18 Aug

     Having arranged ourselves in a position we could observe all
approaches, and expand-envelop-and-close-in should it become necessary,
Mike got back to gaming stuff.  "I think we work on characters some more
today, and then run preludes for each of you starting tomorrow.  Your
character's done, right?" he asked me.
     "Yeah," I agreed.  "Are we gonna like assist in each others'
preludes, as extras?" I asked as I opened the cooler and handed a full
plate to a happy Jill.
     "Oooh, yeah, if you don't suddenly want to see all those bonus
points disappear," Mike grinned at me.
     "Do we have to run preludes?" Dan whined.
     "Mmmm, tasty, two more freebie points," Mike enticed.
     "Four," George bargained.
     "Four what?" James asked, wearing another Star Trek T shirt today.
     "Shut up Jim," George grinned.  "Four!"
     "Sheesh, you guys are already getting twenty-one to start," Mike
complained. "I shouldn't give you ANY, but I am merciful in my
storytelling," he said as he bowed.
     "We're gonna die," Book sighed.
     "Painfully," Dan agreed.
     To the puzzled girls and freshthings, I explained, "When he starts
by boosting us way over suggested starting character levels, and then
talking about how merciful he is and stuff, he's got something really
nasty in mind.  He ALWAYS tailors his games to what the characters start
with."
     Matt, Book's little, started "And-"
     "And we're gonna die," George sighed.
     "It's just a game, though, right?" Amanda said.
     As both Dan and George crossed themselves, I replied, "You keep
telling yourself that."

***
11:46 18 Aug

     "Tuck," Mike said.
     "What?"
     "She's not gonna come over here and bite you," he assured me.
     "I don't know," I sighed.  "She might."
     "Who?" Kelly asked.
     "My ex, Debbie," I told him.  "We did not do the 'let's be friends'
thing when we broke up."
     "Oh," Kelly said as he turned to look.
     "Kelly," I said as I grabbed his shoulder and turned him back
around.  "Don't look, okay?  She might notice you and then see me."
     "Tuck, you're being an ass," Mike mentioned.
     "And, I'm not getting ripped to pieces either, did you notice
that?" I mentioned.
     He sighed, and shook his head.

***
11:48 18 Aug

     "No PE?" George commented.  "What did you do, threaten to date one
of the coaches?"
     "Ha, no," I said.  "Dobson, Doc Treble, and my parents all agreed
that it would be a Bad Thing if I was in a locker room ever again."
     "Ohhhh," George sort of groaned as he nodded.
     "Why is that?" Kelly asked.
     I was trying to think of something to say, when Mike patted him on
the shoulder and said, "We'll tell you when you're older, dear."
     "Hey," Jill said, "did you see how some people have gym like every
day, and some have it twice a day now?"
     "What?"
     "I mean, every other day for two periods," she corrected.
     "Hey Tuck, guys," Kathy said as she came up and hugged me tightly
from behind, luckily avoiding my nipples so I didn't have to scream.

***
11:50 18 Aug

     "So," I guessed, "you... change, go out, play half a game of
volleyball or something, go back and change again, maybe shower," which
I had never bothered doing, figuring that the less time I spent naked
around those people the longer my life would last, "all in forty-five
minutes, and then do it again the next day?"
     Kathy shrugged.  "I think it's easier than doing aerobics for an
hour and a half solid, though, don't you?"
     "Aerobics?  Are you serious?"  I checked, and it was right there;
I'd just found the 'classroom' field of GYM on her schedule and not
looked for the class name itself.  "Jeez.  When did we start having
things besides just 'gym' and athletics practice?"
     "It's some kinda weird," Jill nodded.
     "So, Tuck," Kathy smiled at me, which I didn't like when she did it
like she was doing it now.  "When are you going to tell us what happened
this weekend?"
     "Eight o'clock when I get home from sitting," I answered.  "That
way, I get everyone on the conf call that hasn't heard it already, I
think-"
     "I'm working," Kathy frowned.
     I sighed.  "At eight?"
     "My life sucks in some respects," she lied.  "So, dish!"
     "Don't make me tell this now!" I begged.

***
11:52 18 Aug

     "And you just saw this going on and JUMPED?"
     I sighed.  "Look, it's not that big a deal, okay?"

***
11:59 18 Aug

     That was about eight feet, I decided, so I slid over the railing,
aimed a bit, and dropped, fell and compressed and rolled over and popped
back up and slapped Kathy's shoulder.  "Like that," I said.  "Not that
hard, if you know how to fall right."
     "Jesus H," Kathy said, and looked up at the fire stairs again, like
most of the girls were doing now.  The ones that weren't looking at me,
anyway.
     "Can we leave?" I asked nervously.  If a teacher saw me doing this
I'd get detention, for some bizarre reason involving other people and
Inciting Stupidity.  I was hoping sociology would teach me about this,
but we weren't up to that yet in class.

***
12:01 18 Aug

     "So, when are you going to talk to Debbie?" Sabrina asked me as we
walked back.  "She said she called you and left a message."
     "Uh, why do I need to talk to her?" I asked.
     "Because she wants to talk to you?"
     "That's a good reason to avoid it, I think," I said.
     "Don't be so paranoid!"
     I stopped, and grabbed her arm.  "This Debbie is the same one that
threatened me with death more than once, sometimes over-  Over, uh,
things like who I'm dating," I finally came up with.  "And you think I
want to get within striking range of her again?  I was lucky she was in
shock Saturday, and if she hadn't been I would have left IMMEDIATELY.
Or I wouldn't have gotten involved at all, just left."
     "Vv-Tuck," she stumbled, "are you just going to avoid her all year
or something?"
     "If I can, yeah," I agreed.
     "Don't you think that's a little bit of overreaction?" she asked,
measuring about a centimeter with her fingers.
     I took her hand and squished her fingers together.  "I don't want
to die, and Debbie's unstable, you know that, and I think the best way
to avoid setting her off, which could very well end up getting me killed
if she starts screaming stuff here?  You know?  I think if I avoid her,
then she doesn't, I mean, there is NO chance that it'll happen.  That's
worth some work, to me," I said.
     She sighed and shook her head, obviously thinking 'What a complete
paranoid!'  But it wasn't paranoia if you did have enemies.

***
12:19 18 Aug

     Debbie finally left the area, without ever getting within ten
meters of me, and I sighed with relief about ten seconds before the bell
rang.  "Oh, sh-" I started to say.  If the whole year was going to be
like this, maybe we could find another place to play during lunch.

***
12:27 18 Aug

     I checked around the classroom after roll call, and it was true;
there were only a dozen people in here with me, and only one girl.  And
I was definitely the youngest.
     Apparently college-credit calculus was not too popular this year,
or something.
     At least, though, it looked like this was going to be one class I
wouldn't have to worry about being beaten up in.

***
14:01 18 Aug

     I couldn't think of a nicer way to end the day than math and
physics, really.  It was too bad the rest of school wasn't like this.
It was also too bad it wasn't something like 'High Energy Particle
Physics, Honors', but it would have been insane for the school to let
students play with a particle accelerator.  Ghu knew, _I_ would have
been trying to commit Evil with it.

***
14:04 18 Aug

     It was nasty, having homework the first day, but they seemed to
like being nasty about things like that.  I sighed, and made sure I had
everything, then remembered that I had to go drive over to Rachel's,
then pick up Stella and Ricky, then go to the Parkers' house...
     "Oy," I sighed.

***
14:24 18 Aug

     "Hey," Rachel said as she looked up from the television.  "What are
you doing here?"
     "Just got off the first day of class, and now I gotta change and
run and pick up Ricky and Stella," I reminded both of us.  I sort of
wanted to go home and hide.  The combination of the usual level of
alertness I needed to survive school, plus having to worry about Debbie,
had really been stressful.  Maybe I just wasn't used to it yet.
     She turned off the TV, stood up, and asked, "Oh, how was it?"

***
14:28 18 Aug

     "Physics AND calculus?" she asked as I pulled out a basket of my
clothes.
     "Yeah," I grinned up at her.  "It looks cool."
     "Are you taking any computer classes?"
     "No," I sighed.  "I sort of got ejected permanently from them."
     "What?  Why?"

***
14:29 18 Aug

     "Oh my god," she giggled.
     "Yeah, and they said that if I could pass two final exams in AP
computer, then I'd get two A's for the year, and even if I didn't I
wasn't going to be allowed to take computer classes again.  They didn't
even let me in the lab the first semester, but they backed off on that.
So, instead of having two or three easy A's for each year, I have to
scramble a bit to find stuff, if I want an honors degree.  They almost
canceled the AP Calc class this year, and it's only half full, and
there's not any other math I can take at this point..."

***
14:51 18 Aug

     I felt a lot better being in shorts and a tank than I had all
covered up for classes, but it had been a case of better safe than
sorry.  I checked the address one last time - match - then knocked on
the door.
     A minute or so later, a woman answered it and said, "Yes?"
     "Hi," I said back, smiling, "I'm Valerie, Stella's other sitter,
and I'm here to pick her up?"
     "Oh, hi," she smiled back, and opened the door the rest of the way.
     Cute smiles were immensely useful door-openers, I was finding.

***
14:54 18 Aug

     *One munchkin down, one to go,* I thought as I locked Stella's
crash cage into the back seat.

***
15:04 18 Aug

     I'd thought our school was a madhouse when school let out (for the
most part), but it barely compared to Ricky's.  I was actually going to
have to crawl through a traffic jam to get to where he should be.
     "Can you believe this?" I asked Stella.
     Stella gargled so fiercely for a second that I thought she was
choking, but when I looked she was blowing spit all over the back seat.

***
15:10 18 Aug

     Ricky saw my car about the same time I saw him and honked and
waved.  He ran over quickly and got in.
     "How was your first day of school?" I asked.
     "I hate it," he said.
     "Me too," I agreed.

***
15:33 18 Aug

     Ricky bailed out as soon as I stopped the car, and he'd gone inside
before I could get Stella out of the car seat.
     "Feeling a bit eager to get home?" I asked rhetorically.
     Stella decided she was, and that crying would hurry me along.

***
15:45 18 Aug

     "No, I need to get my homework done first, and you should do it
too," I said.
     "Aw, man!" Ricky complained through his snack apple.
     "Well, you can do it now, or later-"
     "Latugh!"
     "And don't talk with your mouth full."

***
16:00 18 Aug

     I'd looked at my watch when it beeped and gone back to calculus
before I realized that I had to at least start thinking about dinner
now, if I wanted to have it ready at seven.  Then I realized I had to
see what had appeared in the refrigerator and pantry over the weekend,
so I got up to go inside and look.
     "Watch me!  WATCH!" Ricky yelled at me, so I obediently turned
around and watched him have a midair fit before plunging into the water.
I waited until he came up, then said, "Cool!"

***
16:11 18 Aug

     Miz Parker, or Mister as the case might have been, had gotten
everything I'd asked for, but I felt a little tired and not too
interested in cooking a feast today; it could wait until tomorrow.
     "How about," I suggested to Ricky, "spaghetti and meatballs, and a
salad for your folks, and garlic cheese bread?"
     "That sounds okay," he allowed.

***
16:54 18 Aug

     "Oh, great," I sighed as my pager 'went on'.  "Who's bugging me
now?"

***
16:56 18 Aug

     "Hello?" asked Mom over the phone.
     "It's me, you paged?" I nudged.
     "Oh, yes, we were-  You're not up in your room, are you?"
     "What?  No, I'm playing games with my phone system," I told her,
which was true.  I'd dialed up my own voicemail and punched out and
called our house, which was always the safe way to go.  "I'm sitting."
     "When are you coming home tonight?  We were going to take Susan out
someplace nice for dinner, before she left," she said.
     "Argh!" I complained, because I had to stay here and cook.

***
17:40 18 Aug

     I'd thought Ricky was watching cartoons in front, since I'd made
him come out of the water before anyone got home, but apparently he
wasn't up front any more.
     "Hi!" Miz Parker said as she came in, with Ricky wrapped around her
waist and chattering.  That was how I could tell he wasn't up front.
     "An' she's fixing spaghetti and garlic bread," Ricky continued.
     "And a salad," I quickly inserted.
     "And, we got you a phone for your line," Miz Parker said, and held
out a bag.  I looked inside, and it was a bubble-packed phone of decent
quality, though not boasting Caller ID.  I'd have to bring one of the
old modules from home, I realized, and made a mental note.  Then I
looked up and smiled and thanked her, which made her smile back.

***
17:42 18 Aug

     "No, especially during this time of year, we let him play while
it's still light outside, and do his homework later, if he wants," Miz
Parker told me.
     "Okay, I can see that," I admitted.  "I just thought he could get
it done with me here, and I could answer questions and stuff, but NOT do
it for him," I grinned, before I got up to check the sauce.
     "He is devious that way," Miz Parker agreed.  "And what are you
studying?" she asked, pointing at the book I still had out on the table.
     "Physics, I'm reading ahead a little, and I already got done with
my sociology and calc homework, and my cosmetology reading," I said.
*How much garlic is too much garlic for these people?* I wondered,
looking at the sauce.  "Could you come taste this and see if I have
enough garlic in it?"

***
18:04 18 Aug

     I really hoped that I wouldn't get baby food in my English text; it
would be a little hard to explain.  Stella was trying her best, though.
     "Stella, if you don't stop spitting this and eat it," I lied, "I'm
going to rub it in your hair and let it rot."
     "Bububububububububububub," she said, and looked around, obviously
cowed into complete obedience not.

***
18:46 18 Aug

     I heard Mister Parker pull up- well, what I heard was Ricky launch
himself towards the garage screaming, so it was time to put the bread in
to warm, and toss the salad a few more times, and pack up my books.  I
had more than gotten everything done, which was pretty nice, and if it
stayed this easy, which it wouldn't, then I'd be completely set.  Except
I needed to get a good apron or two soon, and find some way to do a lot
of laundry including what I was wearing now, which two items were not
surprisingly related.

***
18:57 18 Aug

     "You cooked all that and you're not even staying to eat it?" Miz
Parker exclaimed.
     "Well," I shrugged.  "I had to taste it a lot, so I'm pretty full
already."
     "Oh, Valerie," she said sadly.

***
19:22 18 Aug

     Eating with all of them was intensely uncomfortable, like being at
a date's house and eating with their parents, except at least I wasn't
having to deal with resentment that I was dating some member of the
family.  And, I was sure the food would be decent before I ate any of
it, since I had cooked it.  They seemed to like it a lot, though I did
have to explain the vegetables I put into the sauce, and why I'd put
them in, before Mister Parker would try it.  The man was bizarrely
mundane in what he liked and didn't.  It was kind of sad, actually.

***
20:04 18 Aug

     The entire house was empty, a very unusual state of affairs, so
once I'd finally disconnected the MacinClock and put it in a crate, I
found a Caller ID box in the parts bin and signed it out, along with
some more wire and an extra-long handset cable, which ought to keep me
busy at the Parkers' house for a while.  Once that was done, I took the
opportunity to crank up the main stereo and some decent music for a bit.

***
20:31 18 Aug

     A minor noise that wasn't in the music caught my attention, and I
opened my eyes and saw my mom stomping over to the stereo and turning it
down.
     "Oh, you're back," I said as she changed her mind and ejected the
CD entirely.  She was all dressed up too, and I wondered where they had
gone.

***
20:33 18 Aug

     "It was really good, though... did you eat already?" Susan asked
apologetically as she slipped out of her heels.
     "The Parkers made me stay and eat with them tonight," I sighed.
     "We brought you a dinner," she said.
     "I think you meant 'lunch for tomorrow'," I grinned.

***
20:38 18 Aug

     Susan had gone off to pack some more, so I was calling Mike.
     "Jeez," Mike complained into his phone, "I can't believe they
always give us homework on the first day.  You had pre-calc last year,
right?" he checked.
     "Yeah, wh-  You're gonna want help on your math, right," I said.
     "Yeah... what are you doing now?"
     "Did all my homework over at the Parkers'," I said.  "With some
time to spare, actually, but I don't think that's gonna last."
     "Man," he sighed.

***
21:02 18 Aug

     I couldn't quite stand it any more, so I finally got Mike off the
phone by telling him I wanted to call Travis, and then I did.
     It rang for a while, and then Travis picked up and said, "Hello?"
     "Travis?"
     "Hey, Val!" he said, like he was happy about me calling, which made
me feel good.

***
21:19 18 Aug

     Arrakis went 'doop' and the light flashed, so I looked to see who
else was calling.  Sabrina, said the display a few seconds later.  "Oh
gods," I accidentally said out loud.
     "What?" asked Travis.
     "Sabrina's calling, and I don't think-"  My pager went off.
"Travis, can you hold on a few seconds while I get rid of them?"
     "Them?"
     "There's got to be more than one of them," I sighed.  "Hold on..."
I flipped the keyboard switch and tapped the CallWaiting key and said,
"Hello?"
     "Hey Val!" Sabrina said happily.  "I thought you were going to call
us?" and several people laughed.
     "I thought I explained it to everyone at lunch?" I mentioned.  "And
besides, I'm on the other line with TRAVIS," I hinted strongly.
     "Why do you want to talk to HIM?" giggled someone.
     "'Cause he's got a bigger dick than any of you do."  That produced
a half second of silence, so I said, "Bye!" and went back.
     "Done!" I said to Travis.
     "That was quick," he said.
     The phone strobe started flashing again.
     "Well, I wanted to talk to you," I said, and hugged my bear.

***
21:31 18 Aug

     "They're calling me back," I sighed.  They'd been calling me back
for the last ten minutes, and the flashing was starting to get on my
nerves.
     "Maybe I could just see you tomorrow?" he suggested.
     "That sounds great... you know I've got, I mean, I'm working until
uh, seven thirty, and I have to be going by like ten, though?"
     "That sucks," he agreed.  "Um... you wanna see a movie?"
     "Which one?"

***
21:33 18 Aug

     "Yeah," I giggled.  "Um, Travis?"
     "Yeah?"
     "They're still calling, so... I'll see you tomorrow night?"
     "Okay..."
     Pause.
     "You hang up this time, I want to know if YOU can do it," I
grinned, and he laughed.

***
21:34 18 Aug

     "What?!"
     "Jeez, Val, what were-"
     "I was talking to my boyfriend," and I had to fight not to yell
that last word, which would be a bad idea since I was in my house with
my parents home, "or trying to, and having a nice conversation with him,
since I won't get to see him very much now that school's in, you know?"
     That caused them to shut up, too.
     "Were you serious about having sex with him?" Amanda gasped.
     "Yes!" I said.  Perhaps unwisely, I realized as soon as the words
left my mouth, which was of course far too late.

***
21:42 18 Aug

     It had definitely been unwise, because they wouldn't stop asking me
deep and personal questions that I never asked girls myself, and when I
tried to stop someone dropped out or something and started paging me
again.  I got up and turned THAT off, but they were still bugging me on
the phone, and I didn't feel like shutting down my system, since if I
did that the phone calls would rollover to Dad, who I REALLY didn't want
talking to these girls.  ESPECIALLY about my boyfriend.  And if I didn't
shut it down, then it would keep flashing at me, since I had never
before thought that I might want to sit and ignore someone calling me,
especially once I got Caller ID working and could trace prank calls
instantly.
     "Doesn't it hurt, though?" Amanda asked.
     "A little, yeah," I admitted.  "Didn't it hurt the first few times
you had sex, though?"
     "Well..."  The pause generated some giggles that for once weren't
directed at me.

***
22:02 18 Aug

     My door opened, and when I turned around it was Susan again, and
ready for bed.  "Uh, guys, I gotta go, my sister's ready for bed so I
gotta go," I said, and hung up.
     "You didn't just say, what it sounded like you just said, did you?"
Susan glared.
     "Since two of 'em were here Sunday morning to see you coming out of
my room," I said back, "I don't think it's that big a secret any more,
do you?"
     "Nnnnngh," she said as she made a halfhearted attempt to catch me
by the neck and strangle me.
     The phone started flashing again, startling Susan into blurting,
"Whafuck?"
     "Phone ringer hooked to a strobe light trigger," I reminded her.
"Hey," I said as I pulled the headset off my head.  "How about you
answer it?"
     "Who is it?"
     "Sabrina, again.  Get rid of 'em, I gotta get ready for bed."

***
22:16 18 Aug

     When I came back from getting ready for bed, Susan was looking sort
of dazed as she stared at the ceiling.  "Are they always like that?" she
asked me, turning just her head.
     "Oh, I think the beginning of school has them a little more excited
than usual, but yes, they are," I sighed.
     "Gawd," she sighed slowly.  Then, "Did you ever check if Debbie
left you a voicemail?"
     "Uh, yeah?"
     "And?"
     "Uh, yeah, she did..."
     "And you haven't listened to it yet?" she asked, getting up.  "Do I
have to do it?"
     "No!  Wait... yes," I decided.
     She stopped.  "Are you serious?"
     "Why not?"  *Because I jumped eight feet off a staircase, is why
not, you idiot.*  "Never mind, I'll do it," I sighed, and sat down and
picked up the headset again.

***
22:20 18 Aug

     "Suze?"
     "Yeah?"
     "Can you listen to this?"
     "I thought you didn't want me to?"
     "That's what I thought too," I agreed.  "But..."
     She sighed and got up.  I handed her the headset and got ready to
play it back, which I did when she nodded at me.

***
22:22 18 Aug

     "Tuck?  What did you do?" she asked as she pulled the headset off.
     "Oh God," I sighed, "not again."
     "Let me rephrase that: what STUPID thing did you do?"
     "Don't you start!"
     She just looked at me, looking way too much like Mom did.  "Tell me
what happened," she demanded.

***
22:27 18 Aug

     "Did you have to jump-"
     "I thought I did," I lied.  I hadn't thought about it at all, which
I was now desperately wishing I had, way too late.  And again.
     She sighed, instead of continuing, and just looked at me.  "Tuck...
I guess..."
     "What?"
     "Well, I don't like you jumping off stuff-"
     "No one has," I thought I should mention.  "About six times
already."
     "But," she said, holding up a finger to get me to stop, "I do think
it decent of you to keep someone from hitting a girl in a domestic
dispute-"
     "That was not-"
     "That was a relationship conflict that had come to blows," she
interrupted me, "which is sort of the definition of 'domestic dispute',
and do you remember how dangerous those are?"
     "That's one reason I got the hell outta there as quick as I did," I
lied.  Well, that sort of thing had been on my mind, just not in those
terms.
     "ANYway," she emphasized, "it was a good thing for you to do."
     "Really?"
     "Yeah," she nodded.  "At least there's one guy who might think a
couple of times before hitting a girl he's dating."
     "Maybe more than one," I pointed out.  "There were some other kids
that saw me, I think."
     She nodded.
     "So... that voicemail?"
     "She broke up with you in June, right?" Susan confirmed.
     "Yeah?"
     "Have you two even said 'hi' to each other or anything since then?"
     "God no!"
     She nodded at me.  "That's why it sounded like that, I think.
Neither of you dealt with breaking up yet, did-"
     "I did!"
     "Sure ya did, Tuck, that's why you went crazy to defend her," she
nodded.
     "Ye-  No!" I protested.

***
22:30 18 Aug

     "Listen!" I think Susan said, as she hit 'R' and the message
started playing again into the headphones she was holding on my head.
     "Um, Tuck, it's me, Debbie," Debbie had said, sounding like she'd
been crying.  "I, uh..."  She'd sniffled.  "Thanks for, uh, for, for
doing that...  I don't, I don't know..."
     Then she'd cried into the phone, and my voicemail, for a while.
     "Anyway," she'd said when she got some control back, "um, I just,
uh, thanks, okay?  I really ap-ap-appreciate it, an'," and a large
sniff, "and I, I guess I owe you one, or something?"  She'd kind of
laughed, then, and then said, "And in case you're wondering, um, I have
DEFINITELY broken up with him over that, and I don't care what he says
or what anyone tells you, okay, we are broken up.  I was going to do
that anyway.  After that...  Um, see you later, okay?"
     Which is when she'd hung up, sounding like she was doing so quickly
before she started to cry again.
     Susan silently handed me a few tissues, which I used to wipe my own
face with.

***


"Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when called upon
to act according with the dictates of reason." - Oscar Wilde


Distribution:
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the entirety of the work (from the BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE header to
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+ ==[--------   Ellen Hayes   @>--,--'---      ellen@barkingduck.net +
PGP DH/DSS keyfing: 33D4 156A AE39 53E2 0313  6714 2878 56A8 61B0 9CDC
+ http://www.barkingduck.net/ehayes -=[1990]=- vicki .sig virus 11.4 +


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