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Child Brides of India
By C. Stanton Leman
Chapter 46: Hurtful Things (Mgg, rom, cons, no sex)
Both Aleeya and Emma had spent the entire day outside
together. It was a good thing I decided to call them in
early because they were nowhere to be seen. I walked around
to the front of the house and saw Aleeya's dark hair
darting around in some wild grass and cattails down by the
pond.
I placed my fingers in my mouth and whistled to them. I
saw
that little dark head spin around and saw her wave to me. I
made wide, sweeping movements with my arm, signaling for
them to return to the house. Emma emerged from the bushes
and they both began to make their way back to the house. I
went back inside to wait for their return.
It's a good thing I was waiting for them, because when
they
returned, both of them had muddy shoes and were just about
to enter the house when I held up my hand stopping them,
and pointed down at their shoes. They looked down with an
"Oops" expression and sat on the deck to remove their
shoes.
Both girls came in with the same giggles they'd left
with.
I watched them for a minute or so and felt sad because I
wondered how the giggling little blonde, curly-haired
beauty in front of me would react in a couple of hours at
the funeral home.
Priya said to Emma, "Come on Sweetie, we need to
get ready
to go see your mother."
Emma replied with surprising acceptance, "OK Priya.
Would
you help me pick out something white to wear?"
"Sure," said Priya, "I'll wear white
also, how's that
sound?"
I guess that just the thought of going to the funeral
home
dampened Emma's spirits because she answered with a sullen
"OK."
All four of us then went upstairs to shower and get
ready.
Aleeya and I were almost down to our underwear when she
asked me, "Wanna play a little?"
"No baby," I replied shaking my head with a
smile, "Not
right now, maybe later, OK? We've got to get showered so
that I can get ready and go. Why don't you put on a shower
cap so that your hair doesn't get wet; we'll shampoo it
tomorrow, OK?"
"OK," she said, "But promise me we can
play tonight."
"We'll see," I said, "Let's take one
thing at a time.
Besides, you've got to learn to keep things quiet.
Otherwise, Emma's gonna learn soon what we're doing."
"Yeah, Aleeya replied, "She thinks you're
really handsome
and gets tingly when she looks at you, She wanted to know
what its like to sleep with you."
"She did?" I asked surprised, "What'd you
tell her?"
Aleeya said nonchalantly, "I told that you've got
lots of
muscles and that I feel really safe and protected when you
hold me to sleep."
"What'd she say to that," I asked.
"Nothing much," Aleeya replied, "She just
said that she
might wanna sleep with you one night and see if she feels
the same way."
"I see," I responded, "Well, don't go giving her any ideas,
understand?"
"OK." She said as we stepped into the shower.
Aleeya put on her shower cap and we showered
uneventfully
(unless you can call scrubbing my balls a little too
roughly uneventful).
"Oops, Saaawww-reee I forgot," was her giggled
response.
(The little shit is at it again!)
"Keep it up," I scolded her, "And I'll
scrub your little
tingle button away and down the drain!"
"My gosh," she replied, "I said I was
sorry. I didn't do it
on purpose."
"OK," I said, "Just be careful next time,
OK?"
Aleeya nodded she understood.
Having finished, we dried and dressed, then went back
downstairs, waiting for everyone else to finish getting
ready. Aleeya put on a pair of jean shorts and a t-shirt
and I, a black suit and tie.
Mom and Dad were next and ten minutes later, Priya and
Emma
came downstairs wearing white: Priya a white sari and Emma
a white sun dress with yellow flowers.
Mom asked Emma, "Is that what you're wearing?"
Nodding, Emma replied, "Yes, It's the only white
dress I
have and I wanted to wear white. Is that alright?"
"Sure," Mom said, "If that's what you
want, it's fine with
me. Let's get ready and go, OK?"
Abby walked up behind Aleeya, placed her hands on her
shoulders and said, "You guys go ahead, Aleeya and I will
be just fine," leaning over to look at her she finished
with, "Right munchkin?"
"Right!" Aleeya said with an affirmative nod.
"Fine, let's go then," Dad said as he grabbed
his keys.
We kissed Abby and Aleeya goodbye and headed to the car.
Once at the funeral home, Priya was anxious and had a
tentative look on her face when Mom said to her "Don't
worry Priya, everything will be alright. You're here so
make the best of it. Come on let's go inside."
Priya and Emma held hands as we walked inside. We were
the
first ones there, so Mom asked Priya, "Let's go pay our
respects to Liz."
Priya silently nodded as I took Emma's hand as we
watched
Mom take Priya's as they walked to the casket. Priya let
out a barely audible gasp when she first laid eyes on Liz,
but her and Mom knelt and Prayed at the casket for several
minutes and then returned to us.
I asked Priya, "Are you alright?"
She looked a little pale, but silently nodding replied,
"She really does look at peace and asleep."
Smiling, I nodded and squeezed her hand. She took Emma's
hand as they walked to the casket with Mom. Emma stood by
the casket for several minutes silent, then reached inside
and stroked her mother's face and said, "Mommy, I love
you."
Tears started to slowly roll down her pink cheeks as she
continued, "I can see you're happy now and with Daddy and
God. You don't have any more pain. Don't worry I'll be OK.
Priya, Auntie Joan, Poppy, Sean and Aleeya are taking good
care of me. Can't you see, I'm happy that you're in heaven
now, I'm wearing white for you?"
She stood on the casket stand, leaned in and kissed Liz
on
the cheek whispering, "Bye Mommy, I love you."
Priya took her in her arms and gently hugged her to her
breast, gently rocking her. They then took a seat near the
casket and waited for the other guests to arrive and give
their condolences.
Priya managed to calm Emma down and after few minutes
Aunt
Helen and Uncle Tom arrived. Mom was sitting next to Emma's
left with Priya on Emma's right. When Aunt Helen looked at
me, she gave me a cold, condescending look. I let it pass,
but couldn't help but think how cruel she was to her own
family.
What happens in some people's lives that make them so
cold?
I hadn't seen Aunt Helen in years, why did she treat me
with such disdain, I wondered. By now, Mom's other sister
and her husband had arrived. Aunt Helen and my uncle walked
to the casket, knelt in silence for a few moments to make
it look respectful, then turned to Emma when they'd risen.
She said to Emma with a little sarcasm in her voice,
"You'll live just fine, now that you're with your Aunt
Joan, my little darling."
Emma frowned, having heard her tone, and Mom rose and
said
to Aunt Helen, "Let's take this outside."
Aunt Helen gave Mom a look as if to say, "Bring it
on" as
they walked to the back of the sanctuary. Mom politely but
firmly took her by the elbow and headed for the door.
I stepped to the door with Dad to listen in as they
stepped
outside. Mom spun on her heals and said to Aunt Helen, "You
just couldn't hold your tongue for the sake of that child
who's just lost her mother, could you? Just what the fuck
are you REALLY trying to say Helen?"
Aunt Helen, trying to play innocent replied, "I
don't know
what you're talking about Joan. All I said was that now
she'd be taken care of."
"Lets cut the shit, Helen," Mom spat back,
"Even an eight
year old can tell a sarcastic, bitchy remark when she hears
one."
Planting her feet, Aunt Helen readied herself for the
ensuing verbal fray then replied, "Look Joan. You, John and
Sean have looked down upon all of the rest of your family
because your husband got lucky and made a fortune while the
rest of us struggled. Not once have you done anything to
help any of us out."
Wagging her head she went on," Now you expect us to
help
you out and let you live your life of luxury expecting us
to bear the burden of raising my sister's granddaughter,
well it ain't gonna happen!"
By now, my Aunt Maggie and Uncle Bunk were watching the
fray.
"Why you ungrateful bitch!" Mom retorted.
Pointing her
finger at each of my aunts, Mom continued, "Both of your
two kids have the best education possible and fully paid
for, even through college. Every one of our nieces and
nephews has been given the same privilege because my
husband and I wanted BOTH of our families to share in our
good fortune."
Poking Aunt Helen in the shoulder, Mom continued,
"I'm not
the one who got knocked up and had to get married, and no
one picked out your spouse for you. And speaking of
spouses, if you knew how to keep a man, your husband
wouldn't have been fucking his secretary for the past five
years while you were out spending every dime he made."
Aunt Helen was livid! She put her hands on her hips and
shot back, "That's an God damn lie! Tom is as faithful as
the day is long; you're just making hurtful, vindictive and
slanderous remarks because WE won't bear the burden of
raising Emma!"
Mom "Humph'd" and responded back, "Oh
yeah, well you'd
better keep your fat ass closer to home and take care of
business! Your "true blue" Tom asked John last year for
$250,000 because he was going bankrupt. Before John would
lend him the money, we had our accountants go over your
books."
Mom looked around to make sure everyone was listening.
She
looked back at Aunt Helen and continued, "What we found was
that you have spent every bit of your savings on the
trappings of success, just to make yourself appear to be
part of the Capitol elite, while at the same time John was
secretly purchasing a condo for his young, gold digging
bimbo in Bethesda for their little rendezvous'. You're in
hock up to your eyeballs.
Because you're my sister, I didn't want to hurt you by
ratting out your sleazy husband, we just lent him the
money; which by the way, he hasn't even made an effort to
repay."
Looking at Uncle Tom, Mom asked, "You certainly
didn't
mention THAT to Helen, did you Tom?"
Uncle Tom just hung his head and remained silent.
Looking around at her sisters Mom said, "And the
rest of
you aren't any better. After each and every one of you
asked for a hand out when we asked all of you about taking
Emma, the reason I might add, is because you each have
children that she could grow up with, I did some checking
around."
Putting her hands on her hips, Mom went on saying,
"The
median income of all of you is about $150,000 per year. All
of you have nice homes, your children have paid educations-
by me- and all of you live in relative comfort. I guess
Helen here has influenced your thinking by telling you that
taking care of an eight year-old will put a cramp in your
coffee klatch schedules and that its not worth it without
some sort of compensation."
Taking a breath, Mom went on, "Why haven't I shared
more?
Why should I? I'll tell you why…"
Looking back at Aunt Helen, Mom continued without giving
anyone a chance to reply, saying, "Why should I give you my
husband's hard earned, honestly acquired wealth so that
YOU," and she pointed to each of her sisters, "Or your
philandering husbands can just squander it away?"
The gloves were off and Aunt Helen threw her verbal
counter
punch by saying, "You fucking bitch! You think you're so
high and mighty? You stand here and pass judgment on us
while your genius, rich little pretty boy pedophile fucks a
black, twelve year-old hussy: and you call US shallow,
insensitive and immoral?"
Mom grew red with anger, and she slapped Helen across
the
face so hard, it knocked her back, as she spat back, "You
are the most rude, insensitive, bigoted piece of shit I've
ever met in my life and I'm ashamed to call you my sister!
You couldn't pick your slimy ass up and out of the gutter
far enough to kiss her little black ass!"
Mom continued on the offensive by saying, "That
little
black hussy, as you call her, has more class, intelligence
and tolerance in her little black toe than you could hope
to gain in a lifetime! At least SHE was a virgin when she
married, not like the knocked up whore you were! And as far
as my son goes, he - unlike some of your husbands - is a
faithful and supportive husband. I'll match my twelve year-
old daughter-in-law against any of you and you'd ALL come
up lacking: in intelligence, morals or otherwise!"
Mom, realizing that she was losing control, stepped back
a
moment, composed herself and went on, "Stop and think a
moment, all of you. How many of you were there for Cinny?
How many of you helped Liz and Emma when Jack died or
helped with his burial and Liz's medical expenses? Jack
made an honest living but only made $35,000 a year, did any
of you lift a finger to help her? No! All of you were still
crying in your beer over the fact that Cinny asked me, at
thirteen, to be Liz's godmother instead of one of you."
Taking a breath, Mom continued, "And what about
Liz? When
we found out Liz had breast cancer, what did any of you do?
Everyone said, "Oh, that's such a shame," and went on with
your petty, little lives without a second thought about
her, her pain and suffering, or what might happen to that
little girl in there."
Mom, becoming more rational asked, "After all that,
why are
you all here? To make yourselves appear to be kind, loving
and decent people with your token grieving when here, right
now standing on this sidewalk, none of you really gives a
damn about what happens to Emma?"
Shaking her head, Mom turned to go back inside and
responded in her normal voice, "It just makes me sick to
think that the death of a family member brings out all the
hypocrisy and jealousy in this family."
Mom walked right past both of her silent, stunned
sisters
and their spouses and went back inside. Dad and I had our
heads hung in sadness and silently shaking our heads,
followed Mom inside.
We found Mom in the ladies restroom. Dad called to her
and
she came out crying and shaking from the adrenaline letdown
after her fight with Aunt Helen. All the other family
members remained outside, and I guess were arguing over
some of the facts Mom had revealed to everyone.
I think some felt they still had to save face, because
Aunt
Maggie and Uncle Bunk silently filed back into the
sanctuary and sat in the back. Aunt Helen and Uncle Tom
weren't among them. Some of Dad's business associates that
knew of Liz and had met little Emma arrived, as did many of
Mom's old neighborhood friends that knew Aunt Cindy, and
Liz as a little girl, to pay their respects. Many hadn't
met Emma and were very happy, under the circumstances, to
meet Liz's daughter.
Mom, having had the inevitable confrontation she'd fully
expected, was now calm and accepted everyone with grace,
and appreciation for their heartfelt condolences. Even Emma
held up well; much better than we'd expected, and only
cried intermittently when she'd look at Liz lying there in
repose.
Eight o'clock couldn't come soon enough for us and it
wasn't long before we were leaving for the night. The ten
am funeral service would be held at a historic Baptist
church next to the Washington monument in downtown
Baltimore and from there she'd be buried at a non-
denominational cemetery in Towson, a northern suburb.
The ride home was pretty much a silent one. Dad asked
Mom,
"Joan, are you alright?"
Mom, rubbing his shoulder replied, "Yes John, Now,
I'm
fine. I got it all out of my system. The only thing that
grieves me now is that I feel my family is torn apart by
this."
Dad, glancing from the road for a moment at Mom and then
back to driving replied, "Like death Joan, time heals all
wounds. Maggie and Charles will come around, I think.
Maggie now sees what Helen truly is and I think she'll
migrate to you and mend her fences after the dust settles.
Just give it some time."
Mom started to cry silently, for Emma's sake, the rest
of
the way home. I could tell because she would occasionally
wipe the tears from her cheeks.
Priya and I looked at each other in sadness and I think
Emma knew all wasn't right with Mom. By the time we'd
arrived home, Mom had composed herself and put on her
camouflaging smile.
Mom held things together long enough to say goodnight
and
went upstairs. Emma and Aleeya had picked up their
camaraderie where they left off earlier in the day and were
watching cartoons in the family room.
Abby said goodnight and made her way home to George
while
the three grownups sat at the table to talk. Once seated,
Priya asked Dad, "What happened? Mom looks really upset."
Dad sighed at the situation and replied, "It was
ugly. You
know from your own family's troubles that airing the
family's dirty laundry invariably ends up with things being
said that are best kept close to the vest."
Priya, wanting more detail asked, "What was
said?"
I was going to answer, but Dad gave me a look and
replied,
"We can talk about that later, there's no point in
discussing it now. We've got to help Emma get past tomorrow
and on with life. When nerves aren't so raw, we'll all sit
down and discuss it, don't you agree Sean?"
Taking Dad's cue to keep quiet about it for now, I
answered, "You're probably right Dad."
Dad changed the subject and asked Priya, "You did
well
tonight. How did you feel about things?"
Priya, resigned to the fact that the former subject was
closed, answered, "I felt really weird at first, but as I
looked at Liz, I could tell she's found peace. That gave me
the strength to encourage Emma when she had her moments of
weakness. I think Emma handled it very well."
Folding and wringing her hands Priya went on, "She
did a
whole lot better than I would if that was one of MY parents
lying there. I would have been in uncontrollable wailing."
Dad gave an understanding smile and replied, "We
all grieve
differently. Emma may wait for some time; it may be days,
months, maybe even years before she'll be able to let it
all out and finally let her mother go."
Sighing and taking a breath, he said, "Who knows,
maybe
she's already accepted the fact and let her mother go. We
just don't know that for sure right now. All we can do is
love her and be there for her when she needs us."
Priya agreed. I guess with that, we'd pretty much summed
things up, so Dad said, "Come on. Let's go to bed and get
some rest. Tomorrow certainly won't be any easier."
Agreeing, we rose and went to take the girls to bed.
Priya
said to Emma, "Come on Sweetheart, let's go to bed. We've
got a long day ahead of us tomorrow."
Emma kissed her on the cheek and asked, "Can I
sleep with
Sean tonight? Aleeya says he keeps her safe and protected,
and I need to feel safe tonight."
Dad, Priya and I all got a disbelieving silent,
surprised
look and stood quietly for a moment. Dad asked Emma, "Are
you sure you don't want to sleep with Priya tonight?"
Emma nodded yes and looked around at all of us waiting
for
an answer.
Still in disbelief, we looked at Dad to make the call.
He
gave a resigned shrug and said, "OK. If it's alright with
Priya and Sean."
Emma looked up at me with pleading eyes and asked,
"Will
you keep me safe and protected tonight?"
I smiled and softly replied, "Sure honey, if that's
what
you want."
She looked at Priya and Aleeya, then at Dad and
returning
to me silently nodded.
Priya said to Aleeya, "Come on sister, you can
sleep with
me tonight, OK?"
With that, we headed upstairs to go to say prayers. The
three of us said evening prayers and Emma had, after only
two nights, begun to memorize some of the du'a said during
evening prayers. After about an hour of prayer, we
finished.
Priya told the girls to get ready and dressed for bed.
She
gave me a look that said, "Keep a handle on your dick" and
I looked back at her and said, "I know."
I undressed down to my boxers and climbed into bed
waiting
for Emma. She opened the door and walked in timidly,
standing silently by the door after she'd closed it. I
propped my head up in my hand and softly said, "Well
munchkin, are you gonna stand there all night, or are you
gonna get over here and let me keep you safe?"
She gave me a shy smile and a giggle and ran to the bed.
I
threw back the covers and she climbed in. I pulled the
duvet up and covered us, then said, "Come here Sweetie, let
me get you warm and fuzzy.
Emma giggled as I wrapped my arm around her waist and
pulled her to me. I pulled her into a spoon and I felt her
soft, little butt come in contact with my groin. She
reached for my hand and placed it over her tiny breast bud,
snuggling herself as close as she could get.
I kissed the back of her head and said, "Goodnight
Emma,
sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite."
She gave a tiny giggle and replied, "You ARE big
and
strong! Aleeya was right, I do feel warm and safe!"
Chuckling, I softly replied, "Good night
sweetie."
"Goodnight Sean," she softly replied.
I gave her a reassuring squeeze and she nodded off to
sleep. As I lay there holding her, I noticed Emma had a
much softer, fleshier feel in my arms than with either
Priya's tight compact body or Aleeya's tiny childlike
frame. I wondered for a moment what it would be like to
make love to her, but the evening's events kept my
thoughts… and my dick in check as I drifted off into a
fretful, restless sleep.
I awoke about three-fifteen to Emma's fretful crying and
hugged her to me as I stoked her face comfortingly saying,
"Shhhhh, there, there now, Everything's gonna be alright.
Don't cry little one, I'm here."
As she shivered, she pulled my hand tighter to her
breast
and sobbing, asked me, "What's gonna happen to me, Sean?
Can I live with you and Priya and Aleeya?"
Feeling my heart breaking inside, I whispered to her,
"Don't worry Emma, we'll take care of you. You'll never be
alone, I promise."
"Promise me Sean, promise me I can live with
you."
Having not reached a consensus about her future, I replied,
"We can talk about this later. Like I said, you'll never be
alone, Emma… no matter what happens, you'll never be
alone."
"Promise?" She asked.
"I promise. Now let's get some sleep, OK?"
"OK," she replied, and pulled my hand to her
breast again
and tried to snuggle closer.
I held her tight for several minutes as I stroked her
temple lightly, trying to coax her back to sleep. After
about five minutes, I heard her breathing slow and deepen
as she again fell off to a fitful sleep.
I really didn't sleep well the rest of the night. I just
held her close and cuddled her when I thought she might be
stirring again. This happened about every hour or so.
The rest of the night I only dozed; every so often I
would
wake and then go back to sleep. I awoke at six am and never
went back to sleep. I lay there holding my soft little
charge, thinking about all the things that were said in
anger, and about the cutting remark Aunt Helen had made
about Priya and I.
I thought to myself that I must be pretty damn obvious,
either that or Aunt Helen's remarks were meant simply to
anger my mom. Again I felt the softness of this little
alabaster beauty in my arms; her soft, rubbery puffy nipple
in my hand and the soft round butt pressed tightly against
my groin.
Priya's explanation to me still wasn't convincing enough
to
relieve my thoughts and anxieties about being attracted to
young girls. I hoped, no - I prayed, that I wasn't the type
to use a child for my own purposes. Every time I had these
thoughts, that nagging question came to mind; am I only
that "Child fucker" my demon accused me of?
Not wishing to do battle today, I pushed it from my
mind.
At seven am, I gently shook Emma, telling her, "Wake up
Sweetie, it's time to get up now."
She stirred several times before she slowly opened her
eyes
with a soft smile and said, "Aleeya was right: you DID keep
me safe and protected."
Tweaking her little freckled, button nose I chuckled,
"Glad
to be of service, Miss. Now let's get up and get ready for
prayers."
Emma had just jumped from bed when Priya and Aleeya
entered. Priya said to Emma, "Come on Sweetie, let's take a
shower before prayers."
Emma asked her, "Can I take a shower with Sean like
Aleeya
did yesterday?"
I quickly replied, "No, I don't think that's a good
idea."
"Why can't I?" she asked, "Aleeya did.
Why is it OK for her
and not me?"
Just then my mom poked her head in the door and asked,
"What's goin' on?"
Priya told Mom, "Emma wants to take a shower with
Sean
because Aleeya did yesterday."
Mom gave Emma a look of dismissal and said, "Stop
it now,
Aleeya just did that to save time, now go with Priya and
take your shower. Come on, let's go."
Mom waited at the door as Priya and Emma left for the
other
bedroom. She looked at me as if to say, "She's learning
quick."
Aleeya and I got undressed and into the shower. She said
to
me, "Emma's got a crush on you and I think she wants to see
you naked."
"Why," I asked, "What'd you tell
her?"
Defensively, Aleeya replied, "I didn't tell her
anything!
Honest!"
Putting the matter to rest I said, OK… you better not
have."
Showers finished, we said morning prayers and went
downstairs to eat. Emma and Aleeya raced to get the seat
next to me, with Emma winning (to Aleeya's obvious
displeasure). Mom just told the two of them to settle down
and eat.
Dad mentioned that he wanted to talk to me after
breakfast,
so I hurried up and finished eating. In his study, he told
me that he and I would be pallbearers along with four of
his family. I agreed with pleasure and we returned to the
others.
Aleeya asked Priya after breakfast why she had to stay
home. Priya told her that she was too young to think, see
or hear about death, and that she should be happy and think
about living and nice things with Abby while we were gone.
Aleeya seemed to accept Priya's answer and returned to her
normal self.
We arrived at the church a little early, and I helped
Dad
arrange the cars so that my two uncles, Bob and Steve,
along with their sons Robby and Paul, would be right behind
the hearse and family limo.
Once the service was underway, we didn't see Aunt Helen
or
Uncle Tom, but Aunt Maggie and Uncle Bunk were in
attendance. Mom gave Liz a beautiful eulogy and there
wasn't a dry eye in the house.
After the service and in the limo, Emma started to cry.
She
said she knew they were going to the place where her mommy
would be put in the ground. Priya opened her bag and
withdrew the sedative and a spoon.
Trying to shush her enough to get her to take the
medication was difficult, but with Mom and Priya's loving
but firm tone, got her to take the teaspoon of medicine. It
started to take affect during the thirty-minute ride to the
cemetery.
The girls sat while Dad and I exited the limo to carry Liz
to her final resting place. When everything was ready, we
brought Mom, Priya and Emma over to the gravesite and to
their seats. Emma broke free of Priya's grasp and lifted up
the green colored rug that covered the open grave beneath.
She saw the hole and began wailing out, "Oh please! Don't
put Mommy in that hole! Please, please, please!"
Priya held her, more or less, in a bear hug, trying to
keep
her still. Mom took over and led her to the casket and
softly said to her, "Emma, Mommy's not going in that hole,
only her body is. Your Mommy is in heaven with God and your
Daddy now."
With tear filled eyes, Mom consoled her, "Sweetie,
Mommy's
at home with God now and you have to let her go. Your Mommy
can't really be happy unless she knows that you'll let her
go to be with God and your Daddy. You have to be strong and
let her go."
Mom took her tear-streaked face in her hands and kissed
her
on the lips and whispered to her, "Let Mommy go to heaven
and be with God and your Daddy. Can you do that?'
Crying, Emma nodded silently and sat down on my mother's
lap. Mom cradled her in her arms as the minister prayed
over the casket. When the service came to the part where
everyone lays a rose on the casket, Emma took a white lily
and placed it at the head of the casket and then wrapped
her hands around the casket crying out, "Oh Mommy! Please
be happy with Daddy and God! I miss you Mommy I miss you so
much! See, I'm wearing white for you so you'll be happy in
heaven!"
Watching this child pour out her spirit to her mother
and
God before witnesses was the most gut wrenchingly sad
experience of my life! Dad and I openly wept as we pried
her tiny fingers away from the coffin. We handed her over
to Mom and Priya, who took her back to the car.
Dad told Mom to take Priya and Emma home; he and I would
ride to the wake with Uncle Bob. There was no use in having
her attend the wake, hearing people talk about her dead
mother.
Mom and Priya left to take Emma home. After the ceremony
at
the gravesite was finished, we went to the wake at a local
hall. Mom arrived about an hour later. She said that Priya
was with her and that she was despondent and sedated like
the day after Liz's death.
Arriving home after the wake, the house was quiet and
one
could feel Emma's sadness the rest of the evening. We said
prayers mournfully and prayed for Liz's salvation and
peace.
That evening, Aleeya wanted to sleep with me, but I told
her that I really needed to be alone tonight. I gave her a
big hug and a kiss and told her, "I'm sorry, sweetheart,
but I really need to be alone tonight. I love you and I
can't even think of living without you."
She seemed to understand and relied, "I feel sad
because
Emma's sad, but I'm happy that I have you and Priya. I love
you, Sean."
"I love you too, Sweetheart," I replied
softly.
She smiled, touched the side of my cheek with her hand,
and
then went to her own room.
About two am, Priya and Emma came in and Priya woke me
by
saying, "Sean, wake up. Wake up."
Groggily I turned on the light and said, "What?
What's the
matter?"
Priya said, "Emma wants to sleep with you, is it
OK?"
Still half asleep, I replied, "Yeah, sure. Come on
and get
in bed."
Priya turned out the light and left. Emma scooted
herself
into a spoon alongside me and reached for my hand. She
placed it over her breast and hugged my hand to her. I gave
her little pointy, puffy nipple a gentle squeeze and said,
"Goodnight Sweetheart."
She responded with a gently sigh and said, "I knew
I'd be
safe with you. Goodnight."
She then fell off into a drugged, sated sleep as I held
her
in my arms, safe and protected.
Continued in Chapter 47…
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