Celestial Reviews 284 - May 30, 1998

Note:  Several people have inquired about my recent absence.  No 
problems.... My husband just made me an offer I couldn't refuse and took 
me away for a sudden vacation, which in turn required me to plan school 
activities before I left and to catch up when I got back.  My husband's 
sudden romantic interests reminded me of the following story:

A man comes to a doctor and, twitching his fingers and stuttering, 
finally managing to say, "Doctor, I have a sexual performance problem.  
Can you help me?"

"Oh, that's not a problem for us men anymore!" announces a proud 
physician. "They just came out with this new wonder drug, Viagra, that 
does the trick!  You take some pills, and your problems are history."

So the doctor gives the man a prescription and sends him on his merry 
way.

A couple of months later, the doctor runs into his patient on the 
street. "Doctor, Doctor!" exclaims the man excitedly, "I've got to thank 
you!  This drug is a miracle!  It's wonderful! 

"Well, I'm glad to hear that," says the pleased physician. "What does 
your wife think about it?"

"Wife?" asks the man, "I haven't been home yet."

Second note: An Irish gent came into the pub and said to the barkeep, 
"Mike, I'll be havin' three whiskeys." 

Callahan set up three glasses and began to pour. "Now, Timothy, it's not 
the usual thing for you to ask for three whiskeys. Is it celebratin', 
you are?"

Timothy sighed: "Ahh, ye know me too well, Michael, ye do. Truth, and 
I'm celebrating me first blow job." 

Callahan smiled benevolently and set a fourth glass on the bar. "Now, 
that's special," he said. "For an old customer like y'rself, here's a 
fourth on the house, so I may be sharin' your celebration with you." 

Timothy shook his head, and replied "Tis verra kind of ye, Michael; but 
I'm thinkin' if three won't get rid of the taste, four won't either. "
 
Third note: A little old lady with blue hair entered the marital aids 
shop and asked in a quivering voice, "Yy-young man, dd-do y-you sell-
dildos h-here?"

The salesman, somewhat taken aback by the little old lady's appearance 
in his shop, answered "Uh, yes, ma'am. We do."

The little old lady, holding her quivering hands about 10 inches apart 
asked, "D-do y-you ha-aave any ab-bb-bout th-this l-long?"

"Well, yes ma'am, we do. We have several that size."

Forming a 5" circle with her fingers, she then asked, "A-are an-nny of 
th-them about thi-is b-big ar-round-d?"

"Well... Yes, a few of them are about that big."

"D-do aa-ny of th-them ha-ave a vv-ii-bra-a-ator?"

"Yes, Ma'am, one of them does."

"W-Wel-ll, h-how d-do y-you t-turn it off?"

Fourth note:  A priest and a minister walked into a bar.  After sitting 
down, ordering, and some chit chat the priest said, "Have you noticed 
there  are no women in this bar?"  He then realized the truth, "I think 
we're in a gay bar."
 
A man approached and tried to flirt with the priest. The priest was 
dumbfounded, and didn't know what to do.  The minister leaned over and 
whispered something in the man's ear.  The man nodded and walked off.
 
The relieved priest said, "Thanks.  What did you tell him?"

The minister replied, "I just told him we're on our honeymoon."

Final note: Remember: even though someone else may be posting my reviews 
for me, my e-mail address is still Celeste801@aol.com.

- Celeste

New Reviews:

      "One o'Clock Jump" by Taria (music & sex) 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=353594030 

      "Diary" by Bruce AKA mcbeam (mind control & breast gtowth)
           8, 8, 8
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=288338722 

      "A Yank in the Outhouse" by David Shaw (war-time sex)
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=357058762 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=357058773 

      "Taxi Tales: Lost and Found" by Delta (quietly sexy episodes)
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=357044183 

      "Diary of a Voyeur" by J. Reynolds (voyeurism & exhibitionism)
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=357058740 

Guest Reviews:

      "Cleanliness is Next to Ecstacy" by John Galt (ff sex) 
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=346712557 

      "The Cruise" by Tonya (shipboard teen romance) 8.5, 6.5, 6
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=351990866 

      "My Sexual Odyssey" by darla (sexual escapades) 9, 7, 6
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=352431683 

      "The Japanese Student Nurses" by Gordie D (naive but
            naughty nympho nurses) 9, 7, 8
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/11090.txt 

      "Under the Moons of Eden" by Christopher Leeson 
            (sci fi sex) 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355696861 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355700493 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355700522 
 http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355696882 

      "Hypno-tricked Wives" by Watcher (entranced matrons)
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=352608685  01 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=352959471  02
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=353267992  03
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=353547607  04
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=353846126  05
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354045719  06a
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354045723  06b
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354308658  07

      "In the Moon That Is Always Rising" by o_rofrano@hotmail.com
            (lyrical sex) 10, 9, 8
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354649368 

      "Susan Jennings" by Morgan (triumph over extreme evil) 10, 8, 7
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=347041782 

      "Amy Swallows" by Walker (oral sex) 7, 7, 7
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355958875 

      "Rush Hour" by Robert Mitchell (public sex) 10, 9, 8
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354407609 

Reposted Reviews:

    * "Fantasies" by BitSlinger (sexual fantasies) 9, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355958917 

    * "Friday" by Uther Pendragon (anon584c@nyx.net) 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355490674 

    * "Funhouse" by RC (mind control) 10, 9.5, 9.5
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355961906 

    * "Mating Flight" by D.A. Ignatius (dragon sex) 10, 8, 5
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355961902 

    * "Not Quite Hidden" by Fin Haddie (exhibitionism) 9, 8, 9
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355961900 

    * "Dating Ritual" by Michael K. Smith (rough adolescent
            sex) 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355961879

    * "Chosen" by Tom Bombadil (ff passion & sex slavery) 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355700567 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355700572 

    * "Exquisite Error" by Eric Shon (mistaken identity) 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355700579 

    * "The Birthday Party" by Losgud (romantic birthday weekend) 
            8, 8, 9
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354649361 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354649357 

    * "Feed the Night" by Brother Cadfael (lesbian vampire sex) 8, 9, 8
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354308632 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354308641 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354308647 

---------------------------------------------------------
Since Last Time and Now in Celestial History
---------------------------------------------------------

-------------------
CR#85 - May 18, 1996
-------------------

      * "Midnight Symphony" by D.A. Ignatius (dreamlike sex)
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=240147597 

      * "For Celeste" by Grammaticus (poetry) 10, 10, 10
Not Archived -- lost forever?

-------------------
CR#86 - May 22, 1996
-------------------

      * "Commencement" by Vickie Tern (coerced feminization)
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=222237936 

-------------------
CR#87 - May 25, 1996
-------------------

      * "The Gathering" by Patrick Donovan (romantic group sex)
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=207060844

     * "Cocktail Table" by Sue (orgy) 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=206953281 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=206874490 

-------------------
CR#88 - May 29, 1996
-------------------

      * "A Night at Suzy's" by Mark Aster (tasteful orgy)
            10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=212405663 

      * "Angelic Interlude" by Joe Parsons (meeting the cyber-
            lover) 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=340917605 


"One o'Clock Jump" by Taria (tariat@aol.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=353594030 

She went to a dance,
Looking for romance,
Saw Barbara Ann....

Ooops!  Right spirit, but wrong song.

The novel twist of this story is that it involves the reader in the 
seductive mood of the music.

It's Dirty Dancing on alt.sex.stories.  No wonder the bible thumpers 
object to dancing.

This is a good story, but it's impossible to describe it properly in a 
prose review.  Hungry for the right combination of music and sex, the 
woman goes into what I'll prosaically refer to as a dance emporium.  She 
meets a man and dances seductively with him.  He wants to take her to a 
quiet place for some sex, but she instead goes with him to an adjacent 
dark room, where they have sex to the beat and rhythm of the nearby 
music.  Then they go their separate ways.

A very nice story indeed.

Ratings for "One o'Clock Jump"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

"Diary" by Bruce AKA mcbeam (Bmauger317@aol.com)
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=288338722 

The author describes this as an experimental attempt to tell a tale with 
no dialogue.  There is indeed none.  The narrator is some sort of 
clinician who takes women under his control and makes their breasts grow 
extremely large.

I think mind control authors have the odds stacked against them.  They 
have to make sexual activities sound interesting without any free will 
or seduction, and those elements are what make sex most enjoyable for 
most of us.  The author tries to put some seduction into the story, and 
is fairly successful in this effort.  However, the awkward grammar and 
extremely objective style sometimes become tedious.

This is a decent but not great story.

Ratings for "Diary"
Athena (technical quality): 8
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8

"A Yank in the Outhouse" by David Shaw (shaw_david@hotmail.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=357058762 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=357058773 

First, let's clear up a linguistic ambiguity.  An outhouse in England is 
not the same thing as one in America.  In England, the term appears to 
refer to any house outside the main house.  In the United States an 
outhouse is a primitive toilet facility employed in areas where there is 
no running water for flush toilets. Aside from the hole through which 
one shits and pisses and the aroma that pervades the place, the most 
familiar characteristic of the American outhouse is the crescent-moon-
shaped window on the front door. I would add that in the United States 
the outhouse usually contains a crapper, whereas in this story the 
outhouse contains a copper; but you would have to read this story to 
understand what that means.

This story takes place in England during World War II.  The narrator is 
a very conservative British lady who lives in a very rural area, stays 
away from bars, and teaches Sunday School.  A fortiori she's a virgin.  
The men are off fighting Hitler, and war is hell on the homefront too.  
Our Heroine is assigned to deliver a bottle of wine as a gift from the 
Vicar to two distinguished ladies who have moved to the countryside to 
avoid the blitz; and she is surprised to discover when she peers through 
the window of the wash house that they are really nothing but a couple 
of prostitutes servicing the serviceman who has come a-calling.

What she sees resembles getting a bull aroused for a tupping session 
with a cow.

After she watches for a while, she gets caught; but what the heck - that 
just means that she gets to join the action.

This story makes some far-fetched assumptions - for instance, not all 
pure little voyeuristic Sunday school teachers become enthusiastic 
courtesans the moment they get caught and threatened with rape; but they 
won't strain the credulity of people who frequent alt.sex.stories. But 
overall, this was a very good story.

Ratings for "A Yank in the Outhouse"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

"Taxi Tales: Lost and Found" by Delta (delta@nym.alias.net).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=357044183 

The cab driver is working on the Fourth of July.  I don't think they 
have a Fourth of July in England - go straight from July 3 to July 5, or 
so I hear anyway.  The cab driver is driving a young couple who are 
ignoring him and making out very heavily in the back seat.  I think they 
do that sort of thing in England as well as in the colonies, or so I 
hear anyway.  It's called voyeurism or exhibitionism, depending on your 
point of view.

And then the night just rolls along.

This story isn't blatantly sexy - just quietly sexy - full of the 
ordinary things in the life of a taxi driver - things like finding a 
pair of panties on the floor of the back seat after a young couple 
departs, having to air the cab out before the next customer, and then 
having the last rider tell the driver to take her to his own address.

This was another very good story.

Ratings for "Lost and Found"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

"Diary of a Voyeur" by J. Reynolds (cepheus42@hotmail.com).  
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=357058740 

This author made one of the most common mistakes that occur on this 
newsgroup: he posted the story without title in the textfile and with 
his name only at the very end of the story.  I downloaded the story; but 
since it was a long one, it was identified simply as 49f46c77.txt.  By 
the time I went to read it, I no longer knew what I was reading.  It's 
surprising how many authors do this - and how many readers simply ignore 
otherwise good stories simply because they're not labeled correctly.  
The point is this: always put the title of your story and your name and 
e-mail address at the beginning of the actual textfile that readers will 
download; do not assume that this information will be available just 
because you think it is listed on a title line - those title lines 
disappear and cause inconvenience when stories get downloaded.

Having said that, I'll add that this is a very good story.  As its title 
suggests, this is the journal of a man who likes to look at women, 
resorting to such strategies as arranging furniture so that his 
secretary will be positioned for proper observation, peering through 
binoculars, hanging out in the mall's food court with a newspaper as a 
prop and perhaps a duffel bag concealing a video camera, and riding 
escalators at just the right distance to see a woman's panties - or the 
absence thereof, as sometimes is the case.  His imagination is also 
quite active, and he also gets hard and shoots his wad at what I would 
consider to be awkward times.

But then the story takes an unusual twist - or several unusual twists, 
as fantasy merges with reality and the hunter becomes the prey.  To find 
out what that means, you should read this story.

Ratings for "Diary of a Voyeur"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

"Cleanliness is Next to Ecstasy" by John Galt (email not stated). Guest 
review by Baird Allen (aka The Bear, thebear@io.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=346712557 

The author states that this story is a continuation of prior stories 
about the residents of Hornville, Celeste's hometown. I haven't followed 
the earlier stories, so I can't say anything about how well this one 
fits in, but it is a fine story all by itself. Martha is a divorcee in 
her late thirties who has not had any romance in her  life since her 
husband ran off some years ago. She accidentally walks in on her cousin 
Rose while Rose is pleasuring herself in the bathtub. Martha is 
surprised at how stimulated she is by the sight of Rose, and fantasizes 
about the event afterward. The story moves along, teasing and 
tantalizing, as Martha and Rose each realize that they are sexually 
attracted to the other. The climax, when it comes, is  worth the wait.

I'm not a big fan of FF stories, but for some reason Celeste keeps on 
sending them to me. This one was actually a pleasure to read. Not only 
was the story well-written, but the sex was romantic and exciting. I 
expect that a person who really likes FF stories will especially like 
this one.

Ratings for "Cleanliness is Next to Ecstasy"
Athena (technical merit): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Bear (appeal to reviewer): 10

"The Cruise" by Tonya (tonya@dialnet.net). Guest review by jubjub.
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=351990866 

Story Summary:  True story of two teenagers on a ship.

The author of this story claims it is true.  You wouldn't know it from 
the way this story is told.  There is a singular lack of emotional 
impulse.  Some of the descriptions seem good, but the lack of emotional 
build-up in these scenes kills much of the eroticism.  The style is flat 
with some stilted cliches. There were also a few annoying punctuation 
errors and some spelling errors.

The characterization in this story is vital to its success.  With 
liberal hints about exhibitionism from the start, I expected to read 
something about how the narrator felt about being watched.  Instead--
nothing:  one short segment with a greater emphasis on the fact that she 
was only fifteen (he was seventeen) and a postcoital mention that they 
were being watched by a couple who were doing the same thing.

Another problem was some of the expected plot disappeared.  The cruise 
was to the Bahamas (note to author: it's NOT the Bahama Islands) with a 
mention of walking on the beach.  But none of this materialized.  For 
all the reader knew, they spent most of the cruise keeping their hands 
OFF of each other.  This was said explicitly in the one short paragraph 
that described the majority of the cruise.  I felt cheated.  There is so 
much potential in the idea of exhibitionist sex on a cruise to the 
Bahamas.

That said, the sex described is fairly good.  The major problem I had 
was that the scenes seemed cut short.  With the rest of the plot 
virtually nonexistent, this left me feeling blah.  Nice story with 
vastly unrealized potential.

Technical:   8.5  Very good but stylistically flat.  A few annoying
      punctuation mistakes.
Characterization and Plot:  6.5  Exhibitionism/Voyeurism not 
      played up enough
Appeal:  6  Sex scenes need more emotional buildup

"My Sexual Odyssey, Pt. 1" by darla. Guest review by Nick (e-mail: 
Nick@cassandra.demon.co.uk).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=352431683 

This is a little difficult to review because it is to be continued. So 
many stories stand or fall by the ending (or "denouement") - 
particularly short ones. So I have to assume that there is no ending and 
that this may run and run.

"First, let me describe myself. I'm 5' 5" tall, 110 lbs, blonde and 
36DD-26-35."

This is not generally a promising start. A story is about describing 
events, not images. Readers are perfectly capable of drawing their own 
favorite images; and if they happen not to like the image that the 
writer describes, then the author has lost them to the rest of the 
story. I, for example, am not turned on by 36DD breasts (it does turn 
out that these are implants, but I don't like those either).

The first part of the story is spent drawing up a sexual profile of the 
subject and her menfolk, which is quite interesting; but I couldn't 
quite get the "Barbie and Ken" image out of my head. These characters 
have only one dimension and are rather plastic.

The rest of the story chronicles various sexual exploits which have 
contributed to her sexual development. Again quite interesting, but 
there appears to be no central theme - nothing to pull this together.

Now, just keeping my eye on the ball, here, this *is* a sex story posted 
to titillate the reader, which it does reasonably well. So what if it 
doesn't have much conventional literary appeal? Many people who will 
read this will find this a thoroughly enjoyable piece. It is well enough 
written and there were some definite buzzes in it.

My own marking system would give it 7 for technique, 4 for plot and 
character (again, without an ending I can't really give it much more) 
and 6 for personal appeal. Normalising for Celeste the ratings are:

Athena (Technical) 9
Venus (Plot & character) 7
Nick (Appeal to Reviewer) 6

"The Japanese Student Nurses" by Gordie D (gordond103@aol.com).  Guest 
review by DG.
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/11090.txt

This is a pleasant, reasonably hot story about an American guy traveling 
in Japan who finds himself in the enviable position of instructing a 
pair of 18-year-old Japanese sisters in the basics of sex.  The sisters 
are student nurses; and when the narrator wakes up in the hospital after 
a minor traffic accident, he finds one of them peeking under his blanket 
at his morning woody.  Turns out the poor gal was raised in a rural area 
with little social interaction, and doesn't know anything about the 
birds and the bees.  The American manages to set up a date for dinner 
that night, overcoming the nurse's shyness and embarrassment at being 
caught peeping.  At dinner time, the nurse shows up with her twin 
sister, who is equally uninformed about matters of the flesh but much 
more outgoing.  From that point things progress rapidly in the 
predictable manner.

What I liked best about this story is that the narrator is a good guy.  
He takes things slow, respects the girls, and ends up having a great 
time.  No Ugly American syndrome or underage exploitation in this story.  
The only real flaw in the story is that the inexperience of the twins is 
overdone to the point of unbelievability.  Virgins who have never heard 
of oral sex I can believe, but these 18-year-olds don't even know that a 
penis gets hard or that people have sex for pleasure.  That quibble 
aside, I found this an enjoyable read. 

Ratings for "The Japanese Student Nurses"  
Athena (technical quality): 9  
Venus (plot & character): 7
DG (appeal to reviewer): 8

"Under the Moons of Eden" by Christopher Leeson (cdl25@usa.net).
Guest review by Robert (Citizen@GalaxyCorp.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355696861 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355700493 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355700522 
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355696882 

In the 22nd century, humanity is at war with the alien Asymmetrics. 
During a pitched battle, a human troop transport ship is captured and 
towed to an alien world.  The soldiers are then abandoned on the surface 
with no way to return home.

The planet seems nice enough - an agreeable climate and an ecology not 
unlike Earth's.  The troop is getting along fairly well until, one day, 
two men disappear.  The next day, two women are found.

This is the sort of story that, for me at least, defines transgender 
fiction.  Christopher's stories tend to explore the emotional 
consequences of transgendering, and this one does so exceedingly well.  
The characters are sympathetic and believable; they react and suffer in 
real, human ways when something inexplicable happens to them.  In fact, 
the tale reads like a good SF novella.

What this story _isn't_ is a silly masturbatory fantasy.  There are few 
sex scenes, and the first doesn't even occur until well over halfway 
into the story.  Though infrequent, the sex is tastefully done and 
occurs at points that are logical within the context of the tale.

If you enjoy engaging, realistic characters who are forced to come to 
grips with emotional and mental trauma, then this is the story for you.

Ratings for "Under the Moons of Eden":
Athena (technical quality):  10 (no complaints)
Venus (plot & character):  10 (keeps the reader engaged; very
      difficult to put down)
Citizen (appeal to reviewer): 10

"Hypno-tricked Wives" by Watcher (llxzt@hotmail.com).  Guest review by 
Sandman (sandman@bitsmart.com).
http://x7.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=352608685 01
http://x7.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=352959471 02
http://x7.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=353267992 03
http://x7.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=353547607 04
http://x7.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=353846126 05
http://x7.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354045719 06a
http://x7.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354045723 06b
http://x7.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354308658 07

On the May the 15th I signed off the net, sure that I wouldn't return 
until the middle of June.  But I found myself with four unexpected days 
off at the end of the month and so had some time for the net. When I 
signed off, I had printed out a few stories to tide me over while I was 
gone.  One of those stories was this small novella by Watcher.  

The premise of the story is that our hero and his friend use hypnotism 
to create several sexually provocative situations among the neighborhood 
wives.  Normally I'm not a fan of mind control stories because they are 
usually a crutch to avoid things like plots, conflict, and resolution 
all very important elements to any story in my opinion.

Really when you boil this story down to it's core, it's little different 
from other mind-control stories in that the Mind Control element is used 
to bypass the normal restrictions that prevent everyone from just 
immediately stripping and having a grand old time. What is different is 
the way Watcher chooses to execute the mind control.  

Yes the women are exploited, although current theory suggests someone 
doesn't do anything under hypnosis that they really wouldn't do in real 
life.  But the hypnotism is used to do horribly trivial things like 
giving the guys a good view of a women in her (gasp) panties! What you 
ask?  No, you are my slave,  bend over and service me commands?

Nope.  What we have here is very, very effective peeking and the 
occasional copped feel.  Compared to the other stories here and 
especially considering the genre this story was almost PG-13 compared to 
the normal XXX.  Why then did I get so excited when a guy copped a feel 
of a woman through her blouse?  

Sometimes a story like this comes along and reminds us all that less 
sometimes really is more.  There's sex in this story, and there's an 
amazing amount of very exciting voyeurism.  I found myself anticipating 
and looking forward to the next situation our protagonist would set up 
next and I found this a refreshing and wonderfully well written story 
well worth the read on those long, lonely nights when you have to forgo 
your network access.

Ratings for "Hypno-tricked Wives"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Sandman (appeal to reviewer): 10

"In the Moon That Is Always Rising" by (o_rofrano@hotmail.com). Guest 
Review by Morgan Preece.
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354649368 

This is an unusual story. The author claims that it is a first erotic 
story, but I think obviously not a first story. Few writers could 
achieve such an effect on a first attempt at writing a story of any 
kind.

Not to praise the piece too highly, but this is my favorite story of 
those I have reviewed for Celeste. It has a lyric quality that would not 
work in another context for the story has it's own musical 
accompaniment.

Encourage a promising new talent, read the story and send your own 
honest opinion to the author. Please.

Athena (technical quality): 10
(My first ten. So shoot me.)

Venus (plot & character): 9
(Plot. Uh, well the story isn't about plot. I've said that before and I 
find it is true of most erotic fiction. The characters are romantic 
ideals as befits a story about romantic ideals.)

Morgan (appeal to reviewer): 8
(My highest rating here, also. Maybe it was my mood, I lost my current 
job about twelve hours ago and I needed some fun reading.)

Grade for a hypothetical class in writing for ASS would be an "A" and "I 
dare you to do it again" with a smiley.    :-)
I am large, I contain paradoxes.

Guest Review: "Susan Jennings" by Morgan. Guest review by BillyG 
(hayden@mindless.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=347041782 

The story "Susan Jennings" - quite long at almost 39,000 words - is a 
very emotional tale of the triumph of good over near-incomprehensible 
and despicable behavior.  The wrongdoing initially found its origins in 
the behavior of military commanding officers in a Vietnamese POW camp 
and later in a broad-based conspiracy to shift blame and suppress 
evidence.

Three senior officers, two men and one woman, colluded with the enemy 
for their own gain at the terrible and unbelievable expense of their 
fellow men and woman in the POW camp. One woman, an Army nurse named 
Susan Jennings, at a terrible price, attempts to save the lives of her 
fellows, and almost dies in the effort.  Still, among others, she saved 
the life of one woman certain to die and suffers the price of that 
attempt by being flogged with a bull whip and then crucified.

She's saved from that near-death by a Marine officer, but the gods 
aren't finished with her, for she and the Marine end up in a cave, 
hiding from the enemy.  The Marine is shot in the leg and Susan performs 
mind boggling surgery under primitive conditions to save his life.  The 
details of her subsequent heroics are long and impressive.

Both the woman she saved in the POW Camp and the Marine officer go on to 
extraordinary successful lives, but Susan Jennings unexplainably 
disappears for years, only to surface, emaciated, worn, ill and 
tattered, the victim, it would appear, of a concerted effort to keep her 
suppressed.

Her friends, the Marine officer and the woman from the POW camp have 
both become extremely wealthy, powerful and remain steadfastly loyal to 
her.  They move mountains to successfully bring about her recovery and 
clear her name by uncovering the plot perpetrated by the evil officers.

If you enjoy a story of righteous retribution, you may like this one.  
The good people are wronged to incomprehensible depths and then win out 
over the bad guys in the end.  I didn't much like the story, but 
nevertheless found myself becoming emotional several times.

First, while there are a couple of token and even pathetic sex scenes, 
this is not even close to an erotic story.  The sex scenes could be 
taken out entirely and the story would lose none of its emotional 
impact.  I've spent just enough time around the military to appreciate 
how thin and contrived that portion of the story was, and more than 
enough time in operating theaters to smile at the heroine's battlefield 
surgical technique.  Still, this isn't a story about tactical warfare 
and it isn't a medical story, so we can overlook those shortcomings.

I suppose I reacted to the exaggerated characters in this story. 
Everything and everyone was simply too much.  Too much to believe and 
too much to be real.  Susan, for instance, emerges as a cross between 
Joan of Arc, Wonder Woman and Job.  Too many times I thought, 'Oh, come 
ON.'

The story has a Hardy Boy, ferry tale quality that employs exaggeration 
over-much to the point where reality flies out the window and Marvel 
Comics barges in the front door.

Ratings for "Susan Jennings" 
Athena (technical quality): 10 
Venus (plot & character): 8 
BillyG (appeal to reviewer): 7

"Amy Swallows" by Walker. Posted by Kristen78 (Kristen78@aol.com) Guest 
reviewed by Poison Ivan.
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=355958875 

Walker's high school girlfriend Jamie fucks, sucks, and does anal.  But 
there is one thing Jamie absolutely refuses to do: she _never_ swallows. 
When I was in high school, refusing to swallow was not a problem we 
dwelled on much.  But I suppose times change.

Fortunately for Walker, Amy is available as a soft shoulder to cry on.  
They have a telephone relationship, and it eventually comes out that Amy 
has no hang-ups about gulping goo.   A little flirty back and forth, a 
few starts and stops, and eventually Amy and Walker end up on the roof.  
Walker gets the blow of his life.

This story could have been a very good one.  Where did Walker's sexual 
expectations come from?  Why did he feel compelled to cheat on his 
girlfriend?  Was it really just the swallowing?  I got a hint of guilt 
feelings, but just barely a hint.  And his telephone relationship with 
Amy felt unreal to me.  I give the author a lot of credit for setting up 
something that could have been great. I just wish he had followed 
through better.

The spelling and grammar were not great, but the sex on the rooftop was 
reasonably well described.  But ultimately, this story left me feeling a 
little cold.

Ratings for "Amy Swallows"
Athena (technical quality): 7
Venus (plot & character): 7
Ivan (appeal to reviewer): 7

"Rush Hour" by Robert Mitchell (). Review by Nick (e-mail 
Nick@cassandra.demon.co.uk)
 http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=354407609 

This is a short story about an encounter between the narrator and a girl 
in a crowded tube train in rush hour.

Who hasn't been here before? Men and women crushed together in confined 
space - something's bound to happen, even if its only inside the head! 
Well the subject matter certainly appeals to me.

The scene setting is good and, as I said, I'm sure most people would 
empathize with the situation. It's certainly realistic enough, although 
one wonders if, however confined the space, the "contact" described 
wouldn't be carefully avoided.

But here:

"Maybe she would think it was just an elbow or something" (referring to 
his hard-on pressed up against her bum.)

I started to laugh. An elbow!? For the rest of the story the smile 
didn't quite disappear - not really the intention I think!

His fly is unzipped, her skirt lifted and she has an orgasm ....in a 
crowded tube carriage with no one noticing. Nice work if you can do it, 
but I'm afraid I couldn't quite handle it.

My own ratings are: 8 for technique - good enough, but short. 7 for plot 
and character - nice story, well described characters, but credibility 
suffered. 7 for appeal to me.

Normalising for Celeste:

Athena (Technique) 10
Venus (Plot and Character) 9
Appeal (to me) 8

* "Fantasies" by BitSlinger (bitslinger@hotmail.com).  I believe this is 
this author's first story.  It's also an entry in my Celestial Christmas 
story contest.  I am happy to have stimulated the author to enter upon a 
promising writing career.

The basic plot is that the wife has become interested in fulfilling her 
husband's fantasies; but he's reluctant to share them, because he's 
afraid he'll scare her off.  Most recently she has noticed his interest 
in a sexy little elf at the mall, and so tonight she has seduced him in 
an elf costume.  Eventually she manages to pry some fantasies out of 
him, and she rewards him by acting them out with him and enjoying them 
herself.

The fantasies are actually pretty tame by a.s.s. standards, but I 
enjoyed them.  Except for a few occasional flaws in verb tenses, the 
author shows a good sense of timing in his integration of the fantasies 
and the real-time sexual activity.  I look forward to seeing more 
stories by this author.

Ratings for "Fantasies"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

* "Friday" by Uther Pendragon (anon584c@nyx.net).  

{Note: I originally reviewed this extremely short story as "Mind Games" 
back in CR 248.} This is one of those really good stories that I can't 
tell you anything about.  The best I can do is give you a related 
anecdote.  Back when my husband and I had been married for two years and 
I was heavily pregnant with our first daughter, we went to a wedding.  I 
introduced him to two sweet, religious, elderly ladies who know me from 
long ago.  One of them politely commented that it had been a lovely 
wedding.  My husband replied, "Yes.  I hope ours goes as well next 
month."  The expression on the ladies' faces as they glanced at each 
other and tried to avoid my gravida stomach was priceless.

This story is sort of like that, but with strangers on elevators. And 
with an unusual twist at the end.

This would have been an excellent entry for my 500-word story contest, 
except that it has 802 words.  

The main problem with this story is the title.  At the top of the title 
page, the title is "Friday."  In the Postings, however, the title is 
"Mind Games."  Since you'll never find it if you look under "Friday," I 
have chosen to label it "Mind Games" for this review.

Don't do this with strangers - the part about sheep, that is.  The 
elevator part is perfectly OK with strangers.  It can enliven elevator 
rides.  As well as what comes later.

Ratings for "Mind Games"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

* "Funhouse" by RC (74734.271@CompuServe.COM).  If you have ever 
ridden the "funhouse" ride in an amusement park, you have no doubt 
noticed that there is a side track that does not follow the normal 
route.  You have perhaps wondered where that track goes.  The two 
women in this story find out. As their car nears the entrance, the 
female operator smiles mysteriously and pulls a lever that sends 
them into a dark, hypnotic area that Deirdre would be proud to 
call her own.

This is a good story, but it does not exhaust the full potential 
suggested by its setup.  Since it has been over three months since 
my last Annual Celestial Writing Contest, I hereby proclaim 
another.  The only requirement is that the story has to include a 
funhouse theme.  Any sort of funhouse theme that includes sex will 
do.  Send entries to me by April 30.  I'll announce the winners 
and review all entries shortly after the deadline.  Authors will 
be encouraged to post their stories at that time as well.  In the 
previous two contests we've obtained some great "Locksmith" 
stories and "In Flight" fantasies.  I look forward to receiving 
your entries.  If you submit early, I'll even give you feedback 
that might help you improve your story.

Ratings for "Funhouse"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 9.5
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9.5

* "Mating Flight" by D.A. Ignatius (jash@kuhub.cc.ukans.edu).  The 
sex in this story is a little more animalistic than that to which 
I am accustomed - literally.  By that I mean that this story 
describes a mating ritual between two dragons.  Authors have a 
right and I guess maybe a need to stretch the wings of their 
imagination, but I'm not a dragon person.  In spite of what I just 
said, this story did hold a certain fascination for a while; but I 
just didn't know or care enough about those creatures to remain 
permanently interested.  I suppose a person married or engaged to 
a dragon or who keeps one in the back yard might find this story 
more interesting than I did.

Ratings for "Mating Flight"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 5

* "Not Quite Hidden" by Fin Haddie (sgoodman@primenet.com).  David 
heads for the beach and is turned on by the attractive women he 
passes.  He lies down by himself in a secluded spot and notices a 
woman working over her lover in the grass nearby, where they are 
unobserved by everyone except David.  As he watches and gets 
turned on, the woman turns toward him; and this causes David to 
explode into a very pleasant orgasm.

This story was posted as Florida2.  I suppose it goes with the 
preceding story, but they are relatively independent.  Even when 
they are combined, they are not a complete story; but the sex in 
each is still pretty hot.

Ratings for "Not Quite Hidden"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9

* "Dating Ritual" by Michael K. Smith (mksmith@metronet.com).  
This is a vivid description of a date during which the fifteen-
year-old girl is forced by peer pressure to engage in sex that 
isn't very pleasant for her.  I'm sure many people will read this 
as a description of a really great date or of the "good ole days."  
I found it to be a brutally realistic but sad story.  I never went 
out on a date with a boy who forced me into anal sex or made me 
lick his cock clean after he stuck it into my ass.  {I might add 
that although I myself enjoy consensual anal sex; anal rape is 
likely to be painful and unhealthy.  The anal orifice doesn't 
self-lubricate during arousal, as does the pussy; and so when some 
jerk forces himself in, the activity is likely to tear tissue.  
This may sound like fun; but it can lead to medical problems.  In 
addition, anal rape in real life is a very good way to get and 
give AIDS.}  I never dated anyone just to prove that I could take 
his cock just as well as any other slut could.  I know girls who 
acted like that, and I don't know any of them who look as happy at 
this time of life as I feel.  I guess I'm lucky I bought into my 
parents' system of morality and self respect.

I try not to do moral lectures, and I know there are no teenagers 
reading this review or this story.  Here is my lecture.  Don't do 
what they do in this story.  Have sex only with someone you love 
and trust.  But it's OK to read this story as soon as you're old 
enough so that nobody is breaking any laws.

This is still a good story.  I just suggest that you think twice 
if you think this sounds like a lot of fun.  I don't think the 
author saw it that way, nor did I.

Ratings for "Dating Ritual"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

* "Chosen" by Tom Bombadil (stbush@iglou.com).   The woman is a lawyer 
aspiring to become a partner in an important law firm.  She receives a 
letter telling her that she has been "chosen."  She thinks it's a joke 
and tosses it aside, but then she discovers that several other people 
(including her boss) know about her selection and consider it to be an 
important honor.

At this point I paused and noted to myself that this author is on a 
Deirdre binge.  If he's trying to imitate Deirdre, I told myself, then 
the least I can do is imitate my reviews of Deirdre.  That means I 
should try to predict the ending.  This shouldn't be hard.  The woman 
will resist briefly but within a day will accept the invitation and 
arrive at the designated place.  She will be met by a stern woman whom 
she will eventually learn to address as Mistress.  She will find herself 
naked in a room with lots of other naked women, and within a couple of 
weeks she will learn to answer to the wishes of whoever happens to be 
her Master or Mistress.  This whole new lifestyle will make her 
eminently but mysteriously happy.

Well, I was close.  I won't bother you with the details of where I went 
astray.  The interesting thing is that even though I had a pretty good 
idea where the story was probably going, the author held my attention 
all the way up to the end of the story.  The constant state of tension 
was really well maintained.  The author himself said he was disappointed 
with this as a "Deirdre-esq."  It's a bit long for the Deirdre genre, 
but I thought he did an excellent job.  In fact, I think he did a better 
job here than in "Deck," where he thought he had finally reached Deirdre 
euphoria.  Like Deirdre's stories, this one lets the narrator make 
seemingly logical choices that get her into a really bizarre situation 
involving sexual taboos.  Also like Deirdre, the author maintains the 
tension of the story masterfully; and most importantly, at the end all 
of the details make perfect sense.  With many of Deirdre's stories I 
have been left with the impression that "this is a silly story but I 
can't explain why."  That's the reaction I experienced at the end of 
this story: it made no sense, but yet it made perfect sense.  

Ratings for "Chosen"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

* "Exquisite Error" by Eric Shon (EricShon@aol.com).  The man met the 
woman via email and telephone conversations.  They are just good friends 
(not lovers), but he visits her and stays in her daughter's bedroom, 
since the daughter is out of town at her father's house.  Since he has 
the same first name as the daughter's boyfriend, when the 17-year-old 
returns unexpectedly in the middle of the night and finds him in her 
bed, he has no idea how he is going to get out of this predicament, but 
he knows for damn sure WHAT he is going to get out of it!

To learn more, you'll have to read the story.  It's a good one!

Ratings for "Exquisite Error"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

* "The Birthday Party" by Losgud (lushgod@hotmail.com). Guest Review by 
DG.

I reviewed a story by losgud a while back, and while I liked the story, 
I complained about the jumpy, stream-of-consciousness style, which I 
found a little distracting.  In this story, the author has reduced the 
aimless rambling and concentrated on the narrative, and the result is, 
in my opinion, a better story.

The narrator and his wife have birthdays a week apart, and he is trying 
to arrange a romantic birthday weekend alone without the kids.  But his 
sister seems determined to ruin his plans.  First she refuses to look 
after the kids.  Then, when he finally gets everything arranged, she 
comes over to visit with his wife and refuses to leave.  I don't think 
any longtime a.s.s. readers will be astonished to find out what happens 
next, but suffice it to say that the weekend lives up to expectations 
after all. 

Losgud has a flippant, casual narrative style that I enjoy, and I found 
the sex in this story to be quite arousing.  There's nothing spectacular 
about this story, but it's a good, sexy read.

As a side note, losgud mentions that this may be his last story, because 
he feels he is wasting his time and isn't getting much feedback.  
Although I feel as an a.s.s. author that the writing has to be its own 
reward, there is something very uplifting about receiving email from 
people who enjoyed your stories, and if losgud isn't getting any (pun 
intended) I can see why he would get discouraged.  

Ratings for "The Birthday Party"
Athena (technical quality): 8
Venus (plot & character): 8
DG (appeal to reviewer): 9

* "Feed the Night" by Brother Cadfael (Brother_Cadfael@earthcorp.com). 
Guest review by DG.

I always like to see some originality in a sex story; so when I realized 
that "Feed the Night" was a tale about a pair of lesbian vampires, I was 
intrigued.  One vampire, Jezebel, makes a habit of picking up exotic 
dancers at a local strip club and feeding off them.  The none-too-bright 
owner of the club is always complaining that his dancers never show up 
for work again after Jezebel takes them home.  As the story opens, 
Jezebel picks up a dancer named Andi and takes her back to her place for 
a drink.  But Jezebel likes Andi so much that she turns her into a 
vampire instead of feeding off her, and they begin a torrid affair.  
Then they both start having strange, ominous  dreams about the same dark 
man, and it is up to the new vampire, Andi, to save Jezebel from her 
past.

I liked the plot and characters in this story, but I thought the 
execution could have been a lot better.  The middle section, when 
Jezebel and Andi are both recovering from the conversion of Andi into a 
vampire, drags a bit.  And I didn't really find myself getting into the 
sex scenes very much.  As much as I enjoy watching women have sex with 
each other, I really don't enjoy reading about it all that much, 
especially when it's written in the third person by male writer.  I 
guess I need to be able to identify with one of the characters to really 
get turned on.  On the positive side, the story does have a mysterious, 
gothic atmosphere and an ambitious plot.  If you are a fan of erotic 
vampire stories, a la Anne Rice, you will enjoy "Feed the Night."

Ratings for "Feed the Night"
Athena (technical quality): 8
Venus (plot & character): 9
DG (appeal to reviewer): 8

* "Commencement" by Vickie Tern.  The four pairs of husbands and 
wives have gathered at one of their houses to celebrate Super Bowl 
Sunday - the men in one room doing manly things like watching the 
game, drinking, belching, and making fun of their wives; and the 
women in a nearby room doing more cerebral things but hearing and 
being offended by the coarse discussion in the adjacent chamber.  
Something needs to be done to teach these assholes a lesson.

So how do we get from what I've just described to "Commencement," 
the title of this story? The women develop a strategy to educate 
their husbands - not just to get even with them, but to 
rehabilitate them; and the completion of an educational program 
calls for a commencement.  Hence the title.  I'm not going to try 
to describe the entire rehabilitation program to you, except to 
say that it involves both hormones and careful training.  And a 
butt plug - for those of you who know about such things.  It's an 
ingenious program; read about it for yourself. The plan worked so 
well that one of the wives eventually began thinking she might 
rent her husband out as a call girl for perverts when the project 
was finished.

The story is presented in the context of one woman talking to 
another.  While telling the story, the narrator is functioning in 
a world in which stereotypical male and female roles have been 
reversed - for example, she's running the business that her 
husband used to operate, while she gives orders to an effeminate 
male secretary who is kind of dimwitted but functions well if she 
instructs him carefully and while her husband stays at home and 
keeps himself and the house pretty.

The manuscript contains several typos, which I easily ignored.  In 
addition, verb tenses were sometimes confused; but I assume the 
author was doing that on purpose to simulate the erratic 
conversational context in which the story was being presented.  I 
have learned to expect from this author really clever plots with 
an eccentric feminist twist; and this story did not disappoint me.  
The plot is farfetched, but it's so crazy it just might work!  The 
part I found hardest to believe was that the women could do this 
to their husbands without laughing in their faces.

This is the fourth story I have read by this author, who has also 
written "Sooo Sweet," "Nice!", and "Girls' Night Out."  I liked 
all three of the others better - but that's pretty high-class 
company!  {I liked Julius Caesar best of all of Shakespeare's 
plays; but I wouldn't want him to feel that I was saying the plays 
he wrote after Caesar were "bad."  Some acts are hard t ofollow.}  
My favorite has been "Nice!"  What this one lacked was the 
surprise twists in the plot that I found in the eralier stories.  
Maybe I'm just catching on to the author's style and am not so 
easily surprised any more.  

One thing this author does extremely well is cover all the 
possible explanations for what is happening in an exceedingly 
complex plot; and she accomplishes this without making the story 
tedious.  This is not a turn-me-on story; but it is a highly 
enjoyable, funny, thought-provoking tale.

Another excellent story!

Ratings for "Commencement"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

* "The Gathering" by Patrick Donovan (drwho@world.std.com).  The 
man's lover has come from a distant city to visit him in 
Indianapolis.  After he and Kathryn have made passionate love 
several times, another couple arrives unexpectedly for a visit.  
Kevin is a professional masseur, and his girlfriend is one of his 
best students.  After the spend the evening out, they return to 
the apartment, where Kevin and Nancy offer to give Kathryn a 
massage.  The narrator joins in, and the massage becomes much more 
than simple physical therapy - it becomes VERY physical therapy 
indeed.

I'm not going to try to describe in detail the ensuing orgy - 
except to say that it's some of the hottest sex I've ever read.  A 
potential turn-off to some readers (but not to me) is the fact 
that there's male/male sex as well as variations more common to 
group sex stories in this newsgroup.  I suggest that you just be 
open-minded and enjoy it, even if that's not your style; otherwise 
you'll miss a great story.

Ratings for "The Gathering"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

*"Cocktail Table" by Sue.  Sue accepts an invitation to a party 
from some graduate students who admire her literary work.  After 
the initial fuss over her arrival, everyone sits around in a quiet 
circle with their hands on their laps while Sue reads "Slippery 
When Wet" to the group.  Everyone gets turned on by the splendid 
reading, and the spokesman for the group suggests that Sue may 
want to leave before the ensuing orgy begins.  Sue chooses to 
stay.  Actually, Sue tells it better; so read the story.

I shall now respond to the one unanswered question in Sue's story: 
the plural of "clitoris" is "clitorises".  Interestingly enough, 
my spellcheck recognized this plural, even though it failed to 
recognize "anally," "Sistine," "dominatrix," and "supermodel."  I 
verified this plural in my unabridged dictionary, where the word 
is found right after "cliticize" (the meaning of which may 
surprise you) and on the same page with a picture of a cloister.  
Talk about a screwed up value system!  The dictionary defines 
clit, clitoris, and cliticize (and 101 pages later gives three 
definitions for cunt, which happen to come right before Mario 
Cuomo - now there's a coincidence for you), but it gives a picture 
of a cloister instead of a clitoris!  I mean, how many readers in 
all of history have looked at the definition of a cloister and 
said, "Damn! I wish I had a picture to clear this up for me!"  
Sorry about the digression; but Sue did raise the original 
question in her story.

{Well, now that I have already digressed, I might mention that I 
did a double-take during proofreading - 101 pages of definitions 
between clitoris and Cuomo?  Yes, that's right.  Yesterday a 
prissy student came up to my desk and told me that another student 
- who was disgruntled over her grade - had called me "the c-word."  
I asked her to be more specific, but she couldn't utter "the c-
word" out loud.  She doesn't realize how truly ambiguous her 
accusation was!}

This was a very enjoyable story.  I have only one problem with it, 
and that problem is akin to the play within a play theme that 
often occurs in Shakespeare.  When Sue has six guys shoot their 
jism all over her body (never mind the cunt juices that are 
flowing like milk and honey) - when she gets her pastry frosted by 
six guys at once, whose record is she breaking?  (Not mine, 
certainly!)  She compares it to the four guys whose snorkels she 
cleared in "Slippery When Wet," but that's a work of fiction, and 
is recognized as such even in the present work of fiction.  Sue 
herself is actually a most demure person who probably isn't even 
named Sue and almost certainly has not participated in Onan's 
Olympics with more than two male partners at the same time.  So 
what we have here is a fiction within a fiction and how do we know 
that even that is not fiction?  In other words, that that is not 
is not that that is.  (I was tempted to replace "in other words" 
with "that is" in the preceding sentence, but then the thought 
would have become confusing.)

Sorry.  Even though I am a most cunning linguist I just never had 
a chance to say that last sentence in a meaningful context before.  
If you're ever in danger of premature orgasm, try repeating and 
understanding that sentence, and it will probably keep you from 
coming at least until your partner catches up with you.

Ratings for "Cocktail Table"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

*"A Night at Suzy's" by Mark Aster (MyFrThAl@aol.com). It's Orgy 
Night at Suzy's, and the gang has prevailed upon a renowned 
goddess of a.s.s. to bring some high quality stories from her 
extensive collection to read aloud as a mood setter.  By 
coincidence the author of Celeste's Pick of the Week happens to be 
present; and as luck would have it, everyone likes everyone else 
and a good time is had by all.

I have to admit that I am flattered to become part of such a hot 
evening of sex, but I want to assure you that flattery in no way 
influences my ratings.  The author knows this, and I suppose 
that's why he toned down my sexuality a little.  No offense taken.  
There's not much to say about this story: read it - you'll get 
your bang for your buck.

This author follows a practice that few others follow.  He writes 
his story, lets a couple of weeks pass, and then revises the story 
before he posts it.  This takes discipline, but it is often worth 
it.  I know Mark does this, because he sent me a copy of the draft 
three weeks ago, asking for permission to defame me in the way he 
has done in this story.

Ratings for "A Night at Suzy's"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

* "Angelic Interlude" by Joe Parsons (jmp@cyber-mall.com).  The 
man and woman have communicated for some time through cyberspace.  
They have never met, but she has described her fantasies of what 
she would like to do to him.  Now she is coming to visit him in 
person, and he is waiting for her plane at the airport.  Her name 
is Angel; hence the title.

I guess almost everybody who reads stories on this newsgroup has a 
fantasy of this happening - even those of us who have no intention 
of ever consummating such a relationship.  Of course, this is just 
the cyberspace version of the old honky-tonk romance that the 
country-western singers tell us about.  The odds are actually 
pretty remote that  a guy will have the three best orgasms of his 
life within an hour after getting out of the car in a wilderness 
clearing after picking up his mysterious lover at the airport.  
But isn't it pretty to think so?

So the storyline is trite, but it's well written and just plain 
hot sex.

Ratings for "Angelic Interlude"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

