Celestial Reviews 316 - February 21, 1999

Note: The Pope was working on a crossword puzzle.  He thought and thought
about 27 across. He finally gave up and asked the Cardinal next to him,
"What's a four letter English word, ending in U - N - T that men often use to
refer to a woman?"

The Cardinal was working on his own puzzle and didn't even bother to look up.
"*A*unt, your Holiness."

The Pope didn't speak for a second.  "Oh."  He paused.  "Do you have an
eraser?"

Note from Homer: As announced some time ago, a contest has been underway for
stories "explaining" Celeste's absence from Celestial Reviews.  In the end,
five stories were entered.  Five judges initially volunteered, but one dropped
out.  (Nick tried to drop out, too, because of a scoring mix-up and because he
felt uncomfortable being both judge and contestant.  I have included him
anyway, because from the beginning I had announced that judges could compete.)

   I sent the stories to the judges without the authors' names attached,
although several judges had strong opinions about whose material they were
reading. Each judge rated the stories and I summed the scores.

And the winner is <brrrrrrrrp!>

JANEY for "Celeste Departs."

The judges votes were as follows

title     Departs Why     Withdraw Rosette Musings
Author    Janey   David   Homer    Nick    Vickey
#         1       2       3        4       5
Judge
Miles
 Naismith 1       5       2        4       3
Tiramisu  3.5     3.5     3.5      1       3.5
Miss
Behavin'  2       1       3        4       5
Nick      3.6     4.8     2.4      3       1.2

Score    10.1    14.3    10.9     12.0     12.7


Many thanks to judges and contestants.  My own judgment is that ASSM has
several good new stories that perhaps would not have been written otherwise.
I hope readers agree the contest was worthwhile.

- Homer

Celestial subnote:

Here are the actual authors and Links for the contest stories (plus one other)
that I reviewed in the last issue:

"Celeste Departs" by Jane Uquhart (janey98@hotmail.com)
      {Celestial mythology} 9.5, 8, 9.5
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444404597

"Why Did Celeste Go Away?"  by BlueWords (bluewords@yahoo.com)
      {Celestial empty-nest syndrome} 9.5, 9, 9
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444883938

"Celeste Withdraws" by Homer Vargas {Celestial blackmail} 10, 9, 9
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444961860

"Rosetta" by Nick (nick@cassandra.demon.co.uk) {the power of
      a good story} 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444220816

"Celestial Musings" by Vicky Morgan (artemis55@hotmail.com)
      {Celeste becomes a Muse} 10. 9.5, 9.5
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=443222301


"The Problems of Utilitarianism" by Uther Pendragon
      {philosophical sex} 10, 9, 9
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=435541794
        http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=435541800
        http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=435541806

Another note: Somebody sent me this update, and I think it's worth repeating:

In case you haven't heard, Victoria's Secret put on an online multi-media
lingerie show on Feb 3. There were two problems.

1) It was so popular, many people couldn't get on.

2) The video quality was so poor, many people couldn't get off.

Final note: Several people have suggested that I (1) explain what my ratings
mean and (2) get all the guest reviewers to use the same system.

Suggestion (2) is a hopeless task. And besides, the reviewers really do pretty
well. My advice to readers is to learn to live with the diversity.  However,
if I explain my own system, maybe my insights will inspire the reviewers,
while illuminating my readers.

I give each story I review three ratings: Athena for grammar and style; Venus
for plot and character; and Celeste for the story's appeal to me. I adamantly
insist that the numerical ratings are an oversimplification, and I encourage
readers to rely more heavily on the narrative review of each story.  I avoid
the alphabet soup labels in my reviews, because I think these labels impel
readers to select stories based on incidental features rather than the quality
of the story.

My ratings go from 1 to 10 - although I think I have given a zero on occasion.
Before my hiatus about a third of the stories I reviewed were getting straight
10s. Because my return seemed like a good time for a break with the past, I
have tried to "toughen up." It would be roughly accurate to say that I have
subtracted 1 from what my old ratings would have been, except that really
outstanding work still gets a 10.  A nine is now an excellent story, and a 10
would be absolutely outstanding.

I am still giving a lot of high ratings, but that's because I tend to avoid
reviewing really bad stories.  I look for good stories by good authors, and
these stories tend to cluster around the high end of the rating scales. For
example, the lowest rating I have given in this issue is a 4.  However, I'm
certain that there were worse stories out there this week - I just recognized
them and avoided them.

=====================
Celestial Reviews Index:
=====================

"Amazon Adventure" by Vicky Morgan {guy seduces sexy Amazon
      warrior } 9, 7, 7
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=438651338

"Ohio" by Mark Aster {random couplings} 10, 7, 7
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=424163689

"Ballbuster" by E.Z. Riter {bitch becomes sex slave} 9, 5. 4
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=441959914

"Valentine Delight" by Sympathy Brooks {sex with farmer's
      sexy daughter} 5, 4, 4
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444540695

"Valentine Wish" by Prufrock54 {Valentine's Day romantic
      surprise} 9, 8, 8
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444883878

"Valentine's Day Story" by Suki {sexual chain of events}
      8, 6, 6
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=442362465

"Happy Valentine Slave" by MC Writer {adolescent sex}
      9, 7, 7
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=443222304

"Another Saint Valentine's Day Massacre" by TcklCurius
      {sexual titillation} 10, 8 ,7
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444452156

"End of the Line" by Delta and Gordie {fugitive sex} 9.5, 9, 9
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=445316100

"Who'es-R-Us"  by Rosa (rosa6262@yahoo.com) {surprise
      auction} 9.5, 10, 10
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/20014.txt

"Dr. Quinn: Collen Gets Educated" by David Oberman
      {Nonsensical TV parody} 5, 4, 2
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19985.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19976.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19984.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19979.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19978.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19986.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19982.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19980.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19981.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19983.txt

"The Physics Lesson" by Allison George {sexy science}
      10, 9.5, 9.5
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19971.txt

=====================
Guest Reviews:
=====================

"The Garden" by Monocle {sex with the gardener} Apuleius: 8, 8, 8
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19267.txt

"Summer House" by Marmot {romantic folk tale} Apuleius: 9, 7, 7
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/18594.txt

"Journal Entry - When I was Fifteen" by Sasha Stephens
      {teen girl diary} Phil 9, 8, 5
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/18781.txt

"A Different Adventure in Babysitting" by Unknown
   (m/F - teen, lactation) Dave 8, 7, 10

"Tenderness for a Rebel with a Cause" by Jan Vincent
   (f/f romance) Nick 8, 9, 9
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19210.txt

"Little and Large" by Phil
   (M/f? stroke, size)  Nick 8, 8, 6
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19239.txt

"Kristianna" Series by ArtaDeux
   (pedo series)  Miles 7, 7, 3
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19486.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19536.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19561.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19682.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19731.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19732.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19747.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19748.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19749.txt
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19764.txt

"User Centered Design" by artie
   (MF, rom)  Jean 9, 9, 9
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19288.txt

"Moon" by Leanna
   (f/f teen romance)  Rosemerry 9, 7, 7
   http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Academy/2194/
   http://x5.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=344507601
   http://x5.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=345132417

"Sorry" by Vickie Morgan
   (music video vignette) Rosemerry 6, N/A, 5
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19383.txt

"Charlie's Angel" by Alden Bradley
   (MF Romance)  Rosemerry 6, 6, 6
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/18782.txt

"Into the Maelstrom" by lcdrjmc@aol.com
   (Lesbian slut seduction)   Rosemerry 5, 3, 0
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19383.txt

"Storytime" by Spoonbender
   (satire)  Rosemerry 8, 9, 7
   http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/18727.txt

"Deliberate" attributed to Deirdre
   (anal seduction)  Roger Raccoon 10, 10, 10
   http://x15.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=244320337

"Valentine Wish" by Prufrock54 {poignant romance}
      Fiddler: 10, 10, 10
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444883878

"The Physics Lesson" by Allison George {sexy science}
      Fiddler:  9, 10, 10
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19971.txt

=====================
Here are the  Reviews:
=====================

"Amazon Adventure" by Vickie Morgan (artemis55@hotmail.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=438651338

The Amazon warrior gets hot just being in the presence of the Man who has been
captured by the tribe.  So she is not really upset when he screws her. There
are a lot of loose ends in this story.  About all they do is become attracted
to each other and copulate.  If the Amazon warriors had a union, that group
would object to the stereotypical treatment of even the greatest of female
warriors as a mere plaything who becomes putty in the hands of the right man.
Of course, the Metaphor Police would get just a little upset at my mixed
metaphors in that last sentence.

The story has a surprise twist at the ending.

The author says in her disclaimer that she just rushed this one together, and
it shows.  It's not a bad story; but there are a lot better stories in this
newsgroup - several of them by this very same author.

Ratings for "Amazon Adventure"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 6
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 6

"Ohio" by Mark Aster (MyFrThAl@aol.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=424163689

This author has written over 70 stories, most of them about Pat and Julie
Allen and the unobtrusive Hero who services their needs and tells their
stories.  It's difficult to evaluate any one Allen Sisters story in isolation
from the others.

I suspect a person reading this one with no knowledge whatsoever of the other
stories would be disappointed.  It starts nowhere and goes nowhere, with a
little bit of sex in between.  It's disjointed and contains references to
characters and events that are not developed in this story.

That would be a false impression.  If you already know the Allen Sisters, read
this as an addition to their saga.  It's not the best story in the lot, but
it's good to see them back in action anyway.  If you're new to the Allens,
take a look at http://users.aol.com/myfrthal/ before you write this author
off.  You won't be sorry.

Ratings for "Ohio"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 7
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 7

"Ballbuster" by E.Z. Riter (ezriter@hotmail.com).
http://x2.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=441959914

"I expect you to be here at seven. Dress is casual. And, bring me flowers."
That's how Ellen asked the narrator for the date, and that's why her nickname
was "Ballbuster."

Our narrator agrees, but only if she will be his sex slave for two weeks.

Have you ever seen that Robert Redford movie called "The Horse Whisperer,"
where the guy tames even the wildest of horses without laying a violent hand
on them. Well, our narrator does NOT use that method.  He whips Ellen into
shape, and she likes it.  He makes her the happiest, sexiest woman in the
world by saying that he will marry her and spank her whenever he thinks she
needs it.  The whip and the chain with which he leads her around the house are
merely symbolic of the love he must demonstrate by keeping her in her place.
Or something like that.

Popycarp!

I've been away for a while, and so I suppose people may be missing my
lectures.  The world is full of men who think there are women worth having who
want to be treated like this guy treats Ellen.  OK - if you say so..

This story may appeal to people who already buy into this happy-sex-slave
notion, but I'm not even sure of that.  For those of us who assume that real
romance is actually an interaction between two (or more) people who care for
and respect each other, this story is likely to be unsatisfying.  I mean, I
think it's wrong to chop people up and bury them under the floorboards or to
wall them up in a cavern beyond the wine cellar, but I can still enjoy the
stories of Edgar Alan Poe. that's because he gives a rationale for the actions
of his characters - they happen to be insane. I also refrain from adultery,
but enjoy stories of hot adulterous seduction if the stories give me a
believable rationale.  This one just expects me to believe that a ballbuster
bitch will become a submissive sex slave for no apparent reason - and will beg
for more.

Sorry.  I'm unconvinced.  Bondage stories can be sexy, but this one did not
make it for me.

Ratings for "Ballbuster"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 5
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 4

"Valentine Delight" by Sympathy Brooks (sympathy@hotmail.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444540695

I'm a glutton for seasonal stories.  So when I several three stories with the
word "Valentine" in the title, I decided to review all of them.  These are
late for Valentine's Day {Feb 14}, but they are in time for Chinese
Valentine's Day {Feb 23}.

This first story is about a guy named Valentine.  I never heard of a guy named
Valentine.  However, I understand that Johnny Cash once wrote a song called "A
Boy Named Valentine," but somebody at Folsom Prison talked him into changing
the title to "A Boy Named Sue."

"Hello stranger, what can I do for you?"

That's the best part of the story. Val's car broke down in the middle of
nowhere.  He looks for help and has sex with the farmer's daughter, whose name
is Symp, which is short for Sympathy.

This is not exactly one of those stories you would like to share with a loved
one on Valentine's Day.  Buy her a box of chocolate candy instead.

Ratings for "Valentine Delight"
Athena (technical quality): 5
Venus (plot & character): 4
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 4

"Valentine Wish" by Prufrock54 (prufrock54@my-dejanews.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444883878

Our Hero has decided to give his lover her wish for Valentine's Day: a
simultaneous orgasm.  She's in the mood, since she greeted him at the door
when he returned from work, wearing nothing but an apron with the words "FUCK
THE COOK" written on it.

{I dangled my participle in that last sentence, just to give you a chance to
warm up your grammatical instincts. I find that grammar rules are good for
promoting simultaneous orgasms.  If I'm ahead of my husband, I can just think
about intransitive verbs, and he catches up with me in no time. Kinda like the
hare in Zeno's first paradox.}

She has decided to put some spice back into their sex life. She offers him a
choice between rosemary and thyme." He decides on some time with Rosemary."
Rosemary must be her name.

At this point, I started to become confused. While the guy was fucking his
wife on Valentine's Day, he was obviously watching a tape about him and his
wife fucking on the previous Valentine's Day. But the timing was screwed up. I
had trouble telling which day was which.  Heck, I thought, maybe he'll come
simultaneously with her while they watch themselves come simultaneously on the
screen. With any luck, I might come with them! However, as I continued reading
and arrived at the final few paragraphs, I realized the author had imposed the
confusion on me intentionally.

I'll admit it.  The author caught with a surprise ending.  I would add that
the ending is poignant, but that might run the risk of ruining it for you by
letting you anticipate the climax, so to speak.

It's a good story.  I think the timing could be refined a little and the
imagery could be a little richer.  But it's a good story.

Ratings for "Valentine's Wish"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8

"Valentine's Day Story" by Suki (suki@fish.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=442362465

The author purports to be telling a "true story."  A lot of people lie when
they say that, but this one has the ring of authenticity.  However, I'm not
sure that's good.  The previous story {"Valentine Wish" by Prufrock54} was a
short story that built to a climax <pardon the apparent pun>. This one is too
much a narration of "true" events.  She dresses up; he ties her up; they
perform bondage rituals, etc. The apparent truthfulness gives the story a
certain charm, but I couldn't help wishing that the author would have taken
the time to develop this into an actual story.

Ratings for "Valentine's Day Story"
Athena (technical quality): 8
Venus (plot & character): 6
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 6

"Happy Valentine Slave" by MC Writer (mc_writer@hotmail.com.)
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=443222304

Clarence is one of those fairies who help Cupid out when he gets overworked
around Valentine's Day.  His first job is to get Sandra Collins (a snobbish
cheerleader) into the sack with a plain 16-year-old boy named Timothy Randall
- of whose existence Sandra is initially unaware. Well, Clarence drills Sandra
with an arrow, and then Sandra essentially rapes Timothy in the girls' locker
room to the delight of the voyeurs from the girls' volleyball team. Sandra's
insensitivity turns Timothy off. Clarence gets a little tipsy from drinking
earth beer, with which he is unfamiliar, and he keeps shooting arrows into
Sandra, who becomes Timothy's sex slave, which makes them both really happy.
It's apparently easy to ignore a snobbish cheerleader's insensitivity when she
becomes your sex slave. To top it off, Clarence gets the barmaid to go for the
bartender. Everybody's happy, and all's well that ends well.

The plot comes across as a adolescent adventure, with one event piled on top
of another. But then, this story is SUPPOSED to be an adolescent adventure.
If you like stories that fit the description outlined in my summary, you'll
probably like this one.  If you need more authentic plot development, you may
want to look elsewhere.

Ratings for "Happy Valentine Slave"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 6
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 6

"Another Saint Valentine's Day Massacre" by TcklCurius (TcklCurius@aol.com>).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=444452156

For those readers who live in Europe or Borneo, it might be helpful to point
out that the label "Saint Valentine's Day Massacre" was first applied by the
press to the events that transpired on February 14, 1929, when Al Capone - the
most famous of American gangsters - arranged for several members of an
opposing gang to make an immediate departure from the Vale of Tears known as
human existence. The picturesque term has also been applied metaphorically to
many other events that have occurred on subsequent February 14's.  For
example, should the lads from Columbia defeat the Harvard basketball team by
more than three points on February 14, the Harvard newspaper would almost
certainly refer to this as a Saint Valentine's Day Massacre.

In this story, nobody actually dies.  It's a metaphor - a hyperbole, to be
more exact. The victim of this slaughter has been cyberspacially unfaithful to
his lover, whose gender is not actually disclosed to us until the end of the
story. In revenge, the lover inflicts on him a circus of sensuous people who
tantalize, tickle, grope, and generally drive him out of his mind. Bugsy
Moran's guys would have been glad to have gotten off so easily <g>.

The descriptions are vivid.  Although the story wasn't really a turn-on to me,
it certainly did hold my attention.

Ratings for "Another Saint Valentine's Day Massacre"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 7

"End of the Line" by Delta (Delta@nym.alias.net) and Gordie
(GordonD103@aol.com).
http://search.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=445316100

Martin's car breaks down in the middle of nowhere.  Instead of the farmer's
daughter, a beautiful babe on a motorcycle stops to offer help.  Instead of
giving him a blowjob, she goes into down and sends help back.  Ya gotta admire
the authors' restraint!

It's gonna take about two hours for help to come.  According to a magazine
article I read recently, the average man will have about 125 dirty thoughts in
that amount of time.  Many of them about babes on bikes.

Actually, Martin has just one dirty thought; but it's a long one that ends
only when the tow-truck driver comes - er, arrives - and stimulates a new
dirty thought.

It turns out that Martin has stumbled into a sexy version of Mayberry RFD.
Christie - the babe on the bike - is the Sheriff of the town, which is called
End of the Line. Mary Jo, the tow truck driver and mechanic, is a close friend
of Christie's. A very close friend. They extend small-town hospitality to
Martin, who turns out to be a man on the run from the Big City.

Martin is a better than average guy, at least according to that magazine
article I mentioned earlier. Actually, it's hard - er, difficult - to keep
one's mind off the topic of sex when the mechanic with whom one is having a
conversation in the bar appears to be playing footsie with the sheriff under
the table.

I suppose people should fall in love after a lengthy courtship or after they
discover their philosophical similarities on the Internet, but a nice smile
and hard nipples against a tight tee shirt and the vague feeling that a
threesome's out there in the wings can simplify matters to speed up the plot
in a short story, especially if the girl is a playful blonde who is good with
tools.

So the plot thickens.  Martin is wanted by almost everyone - the FBI, a
gangster with a baseball bat, his wife - and by Mary Jo, who is wanted by the
Sheriff, who is the person putting all the clues about Martin together.
Things are harder than they first seemed.. But Martin's actually a good guy,
and everything comes out all right in the end, if you know what I mean <wink>.

Apparently there is something going on in the Newsgroup called a Story Swap,
with two authors collaborating on various stories.  This approach is often
referred to as a "whipsaw" - one person writes something and then ships it off
to the cyberpartner, who continues the story, and so forth.  Whipsaw stories
are usually pretty bad - mostly because their main purpose is to talk about
cute things while the authors jerk off - which is not to say that that's a bad
thing! The problem is that the usual result is a story that has little appeal
to anyone other than the two authors.  This one is different.  The authors
have taken the time to revise and integrate their work, and the result is a
genuinely good story.

The story is not perfect.  I haven't read any of Gordie's solo work, but some
of Delta's other stories are among the best I have ever read. This one comes
up just a little short.  If I had to pin it down, I would say there's a lack
of logic or continuity surrounding the bondage sequence at the end of the
story.  But it's still a darned good story, and I strongly recommend it.

Ratings for "End of the Line"
Athena (technical quality): 9.5
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9

"Who'es-R-Us" by Rosa (rosa6262@yahoo.com).
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/20014.txt

One of the real joys of writing these reviews is to stumble across a really
good author whose work I have never seen before.  This was a wonderful story.

The narrator goes shopping at a small shop run by a young and beautiful black
woman (Yvonne) from Jamaica.  Since the narrator's boyfriend (Randy) is
concerned about the safety of a pretty white woman in a "bad" black
neighborhood, he comes along, even though shopping is a big turnoff to him.

Before we know what's happening, Yvonne is selling her customer some ultra
sexy lingerie and flirting outrageously with Randy and auctioning off our
narrator.  This is not as bad as it seems, since the three of them are the
only ones in the store; but then Yvonne bids against Randy and wins the
auction. Now what why would a sexy black chick want to buy a na<ve white chick
while her boyfriend is just standing there with his tongue hanging out?
Eventually, the three of them go at it; and it warmed my pussy to see this
plot unfold.

Aside from some minor typos, the only thing that bothered me about the story
was its title.  How are we supposed to pronounce it?  What does the apostrophe
in the first word mean? I suppose the first word is a contracted form of
"whores," but I've never seen anyone spell it this way.  Maybe it's an Okie
thing.

One thing I really liked about this story was the interracial motif.  Almost
all stories labeled "interracial" on this newsgroup focus on the immensity of
the black man's cock and the white woman's urge to be filled by it.  This
story didn't go there.  Yvonne's blackness {like her Jamaican accent} is an
important part of her beauty and of her sensuality. As the story unfolded in
my mind's eye, the white cock really did look beautiful easing in and out of
Yvonne's mouth, alternating with the licks from his white girlfriend. The
white jism that shot out of Randy's cock really did look sexy as it contrasted
with Yvonne's black breasts with her erect nipples, just as the two woman
almost brought me to climax when Yvonne thrust her fervent tongue into our
narrator's mouth to recover some of the Randy's cum that had sought refuge
there.

Welcome to my life, Rosa!  Keep on writing stories like this one!

Ratings for "Who'es-R-Us"
Athena (technical quality): 9.5
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

"Dr. Quinn: Collen Gets Educated" by David Oberman (d_oberman@hotmail.com)

http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19985.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19976.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19984.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19979.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19978.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19986.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19982.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19980.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19981.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19983.txt
[parts 11-12 not posted]

This story has twelve parts.  However, I have to admit that I read only the
first part and then scanned the rest of this nonsensical narrative to make
sure I hadn't judged rashly. Then I threw into my computer's trash can both
this story and everything else I had downloaded by this author.

This author's recent postings had some natural appeal. There's a genuine
advantage to reading about "real" people: it's possible to imagine real faces
(and other body parts) while reading about the character's sexual exploits. So
I looked forward to reading about Dr. Quinn and Collen. {That should be
Colleen, even though the author spelled it Collen in the title of each of the
twelve separate parts.} When I finished with Dr. Quinn, I could go on to
Shania Twain, and Xena, and who knows who else?

However, the actions of the characters have little relation to the characters
in the television series. This story is nothing more than a childish attempt
to put really inane sex into the context of a television series.  Here's what
the author says in his disclaimer:

This story is based on the characters from the ABC TV show, Dr. Quinn Medicine
Woman.  This is not meant as an infringement on their copyright of the series,
but fulfills the fantasy of mature audiences only. <wink>

(This story contains scenes of sex, rape, kidnap, gang-bang, lesbian, bondage
and bestiality.) <wink>

P.S.  the use of the word negro is not meant to be derogatory in any way, but
was part of the vocabulary of the time period this story unfolds in. <Had me
worried there!>

If these topics disturb you in any way, do not read on.  If on the
other hand, you enjoy such situations, enjoy. <<Ooops! That's one sentence too
many!>>

Ratings for "Dr. Quinn: Collen Gets Educated"
Athena (technical quality): 5
Venus (plot & character): 4
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 2

"The Physics Lesson" by Allison George (allison_george@hotmail.com).
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19971.txt

In the context of a physics discussion with her college roommate, Kate
describes to Jenn her recent sexual escapades with John.

I always considered fluid dynamics to be a dry subject; and I've waited for
about 18 years to use that pun. I really don't know the accuracy of the
author's explanation of Bernoulli's law in terms of the flow of and viscosity
of a fluid within a narrow but recently expanded tubular conduit. In fact, I
sort of skimmed that part, much as I did the last time I encountered Mr.
Bernoulli. However, the incongruity of the juxtaposed topics and the interplay
between Jenn and Kate supply a context that really livens up the story.

The dissertation on dessert wasn't bad either.

Fiddler also reviewed this story, and he found problems with it.  I personally
found the formatting to be excellent. That's probably because I had access to
a Microsoft Word version of the story, whereas Fiddler was stuck with what he
could download from the newsgroup.  That's one of the perks of being a sex
goddess. The author began each quotation with a dash. I have no idea why she
did this - perhaps Bernoulli has a law that requires this.  I thought it was
kinda cute. In fact, I think I'll end this paragraph with one. -

The problem with esoteric punctuation is that, like masturbation, it can
easily get out of hand. When I download things from the newsgroups, I
sometimes get so many little boxes and weird symbols that I have a great deal
of trouble figuring out what the story's about.  These distractions occur
because many of the newsreaders convert the "high ASCII" characters {e.g., e's
with acute accents, smart quotation marks, diereses} to strange symbols or
simply omit them. My advice is to try to use characters that are as simple as
possible, so that everybody will read what you think you wrote.  For that
reason, when I write these Reviews, I always spell fiance without the accent
mark and naive without the little dots, even though I have to go back and take
them out because this goddam automatic correction feature in Microsoft Word
puts them in for me.

Before I "go to press" I also try to remember to use the global change feature
to convert all the "smart" quotes and apostrophes to ordinary straight-line
versions.  I suggest that other authors do likewise, and I encourage you to
offer me suggestions if I am still messing up my formatting in any way.

Ratings for "The Physics Lesson"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 9.5
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9.5

=====================
Guest Reviews:
=====================

"The Garden" by Monocle
        Email: monocle_o@hotmail.com
        Review by: Apuleius

I really enjoyed this story, for many reasons. Madeline, who is disillusioned
with her husband's mechanical lovemaking, has passionate sex with the estate's
gardener. That's all it is as far as the plot is concerned, but the story's
strengths are in its details.

One is the choice of names. Have you ever noticed how many ASS/M female
protagonists have names like Stacy and Jenny? I don't know whether the author
of this story chose "Madeline" for its old-world connotations (indeed, there
is no indication of era in the story at all) but it is certainly distinctive.

The sexual description is very good, with a skillfully handled rise in tension
from the opening to the close. As might be expected in a story set in a
garden, there are many passages concerning buds and petals opening, but in
general the author avoids the worst cliches of "hot" prose (I recall one
example of "velvet tunnel"). An unusual and enjoyable story.


~> Pandora (story codes/genre) MF rom nc? preg? / adulterous sex
~> Athena (technical quality)    8
~> Venus (plot and character)    8
~> Apuleius (appeal to reviewer) 8
~> Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19267.txt


"Summer House" by Marmot
        Email: marmot6@hotmail.com
        Review by: Apuleius

Another unusual but good story. Alexandra Petrov and her Finnish boyfriend
Laark have gone ice fishing, but become lost in a blizzard and seek refuge in
a cabin. We all know what happens next.

I felt this story could have been a bit longer (it's just over 10K). The
initial stages of their lovemaking need more development; since we are told
that it is Laark's first time, I would have expected this fact to be given a
far greater emphasis than is described. The story has a certain whimsical,
even comical, quality which is rather unusual, and the episode at the end
would be bewildering to anyone not versed in Russian folk tales.

I'll help with this final passage: "Baba Yaga" is a witch, who lives in  a
wooden house which sits on top of a chicken leg (!). She is mostly  evil, but
is known to do good deeds for those in distress, such as our protagonists.
It's certainly her first ever appearance in a sex story.

~> Pandora (story codes/genre) MF rom (fant)/ romantic winter liason
~> Athena (technical quality)    9
~> Venus (plot and character)    7
~> Apuleius (appeal to reviewer) 7
~> Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/18594.txt

"Journal Entry - When I was Fifteen" by Sasha Stephens (mf, teen)
        Email: november919@hotmail.com
        Web: http://151.201.20.17/november
        Review by: Phil

This very short piece claims to be a true entry in the narrator's diary, and
describes her losing (or rather gifting) her virginity at a tender age, and
two later snippets of sex with John, the lucky recipient. It's poetically and
sensuously written, with few errors, but too brief to induce a vicarious
ecstasy in this reviewer at least. If it is true, November's introduction to
sex was considerably more fun than most girls'.

~>Pandora (story code/genre) mf teen
~>Technical/grammar  9
~>Description 8
~>Erotic effect on reviewer 5
~>Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/18781.txt

"A Different Adventure in Babysitting" by Unknown
     Review by: Dave437

This story hit me square between the eyes!  Apuleius, how could you have known
that it was about my wildest fantasy...............?

The story was fairly well written, but lacked a little depth (not much).  The
characters would have been a little better if developed more and the scenes
were good, but could have been expanded.

Every man in the world fantasizes being back in the warmth of Mother's arms
and suckling at her breasts.  This is a universal fantasy, so men should enjoy
the story quite well.  I know from conversations with women that they also are
sexually turned on by the suckling at their breasts.  I have been fortunate
enough to have done so myself in my 20's and I have to beg to differ at the
author's description of the milk as sour (It is not....it is quite sweet).

The thoughts of the teenage boy are quite normal, leading me to believe it was
written by a young man.  The introduction to sex, implied as the first time,
was well described and pleasant.  The story has a high "stroke" value, but
isn't that what alt.sex.stories is about?  Sherlock Holmes mysteries belong in
another group.

The eroticism is very good and I believe both men and women will enjoy it.
Either sex can identify with the characters even though they are not strongly
developed (or maybe because they are not).  It rated very high in my view of
eroticism.  The sex is straightforward but not badly described.  The missing
romance, which I happen to like, does not detract from the story.  It is
reasonable to believe (women can lactate freely when they condition their
bodies to do so, but I understand it is very difficult) and not a great deal
of imagining is necessary to fantasize yourself in the story.

It is fun, enjoyable, and nicely written.  Overall I would rate is as an 8 out
of ten.

~>Pandora
~>Athena (Technical and Grammar) 8
~>Venus (Plot and Character) 7
~>Dave (Erotic Appeal to reviewer) 10

"Tenderness for a Rebel with a Cause" by Jan Vincent
        e-mail jan123@hotmail.com
        review by nick@cassandra.demon.co.uk

This is a story about the developing relationship between two girls as they
pass through school into adulthood. Rhonda is a popular "straight" girl who
becomes entangled with Julie, the school rebel. The characters of both girls
change as they grow and Rhonda becomes a singer songwriter for a rock band,
while Julie, the independent rebel, ends up totally besotted with her.

I found this quite a heartwarming story, with lots of subtle undertones that
one could easily get lost in. Unfortunately I think it could have done with a
different approach. The writer starts off by telling us that this is not "your
typical ass/m story" in that she wanted to move people. I beg to differ in
that there are plenty of ass/m stories that intend to move people. Moreover it
is firmly rooted in the ass/m tradition of rampant and often unrealistic sex
(although the two protagonists never actually get it together). I found it
hard, therefore, to believe in the characters as real human beings, and this
story required that.

I was intrigued by the fact that the story coding included the words "smoking"
and "rock band". I'm not sure about their use her, but it seemed odd that
somebody might be turned on or squicked by the fact that the story included
smoking and that there was a rock band in it. Still, it takes all sorts.

~>Pandora (F/F Romance)
~>Athena (Technique) 8
~>Venus (Plot/character) 8
~>Nick (appeal to reviewer) 9

~>Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19210.txt

"Little and Large" by Phil
        e-mail phil@xanadu2000.demon.co.uk
        Review by nick@cassandra.demon.co.uk

This is a very short piece of stroke fiction written in first and second
person. The "little and large" of the title refer to the size of the man's
penis relative to the girls various orifices. Although it is not actually
stated anywhere, this could therefore have some appeal for pedophiles.

Its not at all bad though. The female character is affectionately drawn and
there is a definite feel for a relationship between the two. Don't expect too
much though. It is, as I've said, pure stroke, and it is very short.

~>Pandora (M/f? stroke)
~>Athena (Technique) 8
~>Venus (Plot and Character) 8
~>Nick (Appeal to reviewer) 6

~>Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19239.txt
"Kristianna" Series, by ArtaDeux
        Email: ArtaDeux@aol.com
        reviewed by Miles <mnaismith@hotmail.com>

Beginning with Kristianna's Bridge (1/?), ArtaDeux has begun a serial story
that had reached part 10 by the time this review was due.  More parts will
follow.

The story begins with a passing reference to the narrator/heroine finding and
studying her grandfather's stash of porn at age ten.  It then moves directly
to her first blow job, given by a bridge at age twelve to a fellow twelve year
old.  The heroine initiates this act, having previously progressed only to
kissing.  She describes the feeling of the erection in her mouth as wonderful
and dutifully swallows.  The story then chronicles her successful
experimentation with masturbation, her botched attempt to give up her
virginity as a breaking up gift to the blow job recipient, her initially non-
penetrative abuse by her mother's fianc,, her loss of virginity at thirteen by
rape, and culminates in her immediate voluntary copulation following the rape
to make sure she still could enjoy sex.  The heroine is not a happy camper in
this series, and the sex seems perfunctory rather than pleasurable in the
narration.

The story is supposedly set in the early eighties, which would make the
narrator late twenties in age, but the awkward constructions, misspelled words
and grammatical errors would suggest a younger writer.  I personally found
that the progression of events and the stated reactions and thoughts of the
narrator/heroine lacked credibility, sounding more like an adolescent fantasy
than anything else.  The writer purports to have spoken to many whose stories
mirror hers, but I simply cannot buy it as written here.  I am not a fan of
pedo, but I can enjoy stories of children just coming into sexual maturity
exploring in a manner consistent with their age, and I can recognize a well
told tale even when I don't like the subject matter.  I tried hard not to let
my distaste for pedo-the-RL-act prevent me from enjoying this story, but I
simply could not warm up to this series.  I suppose a pedo fan with no RL
children to compare to the heroine could interpret the lack of polish in the
writing as a charming expression of artless veracity, and the abuse of the
heroine as sexy rather than sad, but I could not make that jump.

~> Pandora (Story Codes/Genre) mf, Mf, oral, mast (pedo)
~> Athena (Technical and Grammar) 7
~> Venus (Plot and Character) 7
~> Miles (Appeal to reviewer) 3
~> Links:

http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19486.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19536.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19561.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19682.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19731.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19732.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19747.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19748.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19749.txt
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19764.txt

"User Centered Design" by artie (MF, rom)
        email: <artie@netgate.net>
        Review by: Jean <jw.revu@quihye.demon.co.uk>

Busy at work; so I'm afraid that I haven't devoted the time to this story or
review that I should have done, but I enjoyed it. So I'm going ahead anyway to
give it some publicity.

The narrator is into electronics and occasionally puts together gadgets from
requests he gets through newsgroups.  The story concerns one particular
assignment he takes on and the relationship that develops. I started it
intending to read a few pages to get the flavour and found myself reading to
the end.

The writing is good enough to carry the interesting story line, and amicable
characters makes it worth downloading.  I think Artie posted a couple of other
stories at the same time; I'll just go and see...

~>Pandora (Story Codes/Genre) MF, Rom
~>Athena (Technical and Grammar)       9
~>Venus (Plot and Character)   9
~>Jean (Appeal to Reviewer)           9
~>Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19288.txt

"Moon" by Leanna
        Email: leanna1@hotmail.com
        Review by: Rosemerry

Two girls in love... what more can we ask for? This long and winding story
opens with the hint that it will end in tragedy; if so, I haven't read the
ending. Parts 1 through 6 are the tale of Janet and her friend Moon, both
young and beautiful, both struggling with the difficulties of being bisexual
in an intolerant world. The contrast between the beauty and tenderness of
their affair and the ugly, sordid hatred that surrounds them is marked,
poignant and well written.

The story's plot seems to hang together up until this point, and the technical
quality is good. I found the characterization reasonably good, at least with
the main characters. The rest of the cast is perhaps drawn from stock images a
little too much. The sex is inventive, sweetly written, beautifully expressed
and very arousing.

If the author feels the story is too long for general appeal, I think it could
be handily condensed. However, doing so would probably require leaving out
some of those sex scenes, and what an agonizing decision that would be!
Overall, well done.

~>Pandora (Story Codes/Genre) {f/f}
~>Athena (Technical and Grammar) 9
~>Venus (Plot and Character) 7
~>Rosemerry (Appeal to Reviewer) 7
~>Links:
        http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Academy/2194/
        http://x5.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=344507601
        http://x5.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=345132417

"Sorry" by Vickie Morgan
        Email:  <artemis55@hotmail.com>
        Review by: Rosemerry

A very short little sketch, a "do" of a music video with a twist. The little
story's text flowed reasonably well, with some technical errors. The question
of plot and character didn't really come up, in such a storyless vignette,
hence the N/A.

No graphic depiction of sex at all in this one, so I can't really call it
erotica. I should also remark that I don't think the video imagery worked so
well as a story; it just made me impatient. However, the ending made me laugh!

~>Pandora (Story Codes/Genre) {MF}
~>Athena (Technical and Grammar) 6
~>Venus (Plot and Character) N/A
~>Rosemerry (Appeal to Reviewer) 5
~>Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19383.txt

"Charlie's Angel" by Alden Bradley
        Email:  <zzztopper@aol.com>
        Review by: Rosemerry

This story had a lot to recommend it; I think it needs an overhaul, but could
be very worthwhile after that. The writing flows well, making heavy use of
conversation; I noticed that I didn't have any trouble knowing who said what,
which is often a problem with long conversational interludes. The author was
reasonably visual, giving us proper surroundings and a colorful vision.

The first thing I noticed that I could really call a problem was that the
author pretty much skipped graphic descriptions of sex. In an erotic
newsgroup, this could be construed as reducing its appeal. The author also
needs to work on the plot in terms of believability; I liked the character of
Charlie, his sense of humor and his self-image, and he was very well written,
but there just wasn't enough reason for a strange, younger, beautiful woman to
fall for him. She herself was less well written, seeming a little flat and
depthless.

In addition, the last third or so of the tale lacked interest. It was really
nothing more than a string of logistics leading to their marriage, without the
conversation and personal interaction that made the rest of the story
readable. Much could have been made, in terms of dramatic tension, about their
difficulties in getting together; this was skimmed over.

Charlie's thoughts and feelings while he waited for his lover were very
believable and well written. It was like a stream-of-consciousness direct
recording from someone's actual thoughts. On the whole, Charlie was well-
characterized. He shouldn't have had to carry the whole story on his own.

~>Pandora (Story Codes/Genre) {MF, romance}
~>Athena (Technical and Grammar) 6
~>Venus (Plot and Character) 6
~>Rosemerry (Appeal to Reviewer) 6
~>Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/18782.txt

"Into the Maelstrom" by lcdrjmc@aol,com
        Email:  lcdrjmc@aol.com
        Review by: Rosemerry

Reluctant Carolyn is sexually initiated into the wonders of mega-lesbian
sluthood in many imaginatively natural, unnatural and supernatural ways.

An exhaustively long piece, ten parts in length. I'm afraid the story suffered
from a real lack of "show don't tell". I had a hard time telling the
characters apart, and the flow of the story was pretty much "this happened,
then this happened".  It happened a lot, too. Eight chapters in, she's still
reluctant, yet still pliantly allows all this to happen.

The opening of a story is designed to do certain tasks. It must introduce to
us a character and "hook" us to that character by giving us something we want
to find out more about. The same is true of the plot; we must want to keep
going. And finally, the opening should let us know what kind of story it is,
in terms of time and place. If it's a fantasy story set in a magical forest,
the opening will be very different in tone and background from a story set in
the modern day, or from one set on Mars. That's a lot to expect from a few
paragraphs, but they are all essential.

This opening gave us the locale and timescale quite effectively with
references to offices and telephones. It didn't draw me into the character,
however, giving her name and description and her colorless thoughts about her
co-workers. As for the plot, it made no appearance whatsoever until much
later.

The technical errors were usually on the order of mixed-up word choices, using
"manor" instead of "manner" for example. There were some punctuation errors as
well, but nothing that would kill off a good story.  I would call this a
stroke story with ambitions of true storyhood that it just couldn't reach.

~>Pandora (Story Codes/Genre) (F+/F, Reluc, and a few surprises) I'd add
(teen, nc)
~>Athena (Technical and Grammar) 5
~>Venus (Plot and Character) 3
~>Rosemerry (Appeal to Reviewer) 0
~>Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19383.txt

"Storytime" by Spoonbender
        Email:  theodore@spoonbender.demon.co.uk
        Review by: Rosemerry

This was my first Spoonbender, hard though it is to believe, and I must say I
enjoyed it. I can't say it was exactly arousing, but it did make me laugh. A
skillfully braided series of vignettes leads us through an episode of Wendy,
the storyteller, and her audience of millions.  It's not really a story, nor
is it a sex story, but it makes for good satire; like all good satire, there
is a hint of piercing sadness. I won't tell you anymore... just go read it.

There were a few technical errors, nothing major. Ordinarily, in a sketch like
this where plot and character are unimportant, I let the number referring to
them go as N/A. In this case, however, I think the skill it takes to satirize
qualifies as a replacement, so that's what the "Venus" number refers to.

~>Pandora (Story Codes/Genre) {F, cons, mast?}
~>Athena (Technical and Grammar) 8
~>Venus (Plot and Character) 9
~>Rosemerry (Appeal to Reviewer) 7
~>Links:
        http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/18727.txt

"Deliberate" attributed to Deirdre
        email: unknown
        review by: Roger Raccoon

"Oh, my."

Those are the words of the supporting character in this excellent story, but
they could equally well be the reviewer's.  Deirdre has crafted a lovely short
tale of power and seduction, all in the context of a loving supportive
relationship.

The "Deliberate" of the title refers to the main character's long deliberate
seduction of his lover into a kink not originally her own, to wit, anal sex.
The story is enormously seductive as well.  This reviewer's kinks run solely
to the visual and tactile (I like my women in furs and masks - what can I
say?), but the story was enormously arousing just the same.  As the clich,
says, the mind is the ultimate sexual organ, and this story is much more about
the workings of the mind than of cocks and asses.

~>Pandora (Story Codes/Genre) {MF)
~>Athena (Technical and Grammar) 10
~>Venus (Plot and Character) 10
~>Roger (Appeal to Reviewer) 10
~>Links:
        http://x15.dejanews.com/getdoc.xp?AN=244320337


"Valentine Wish" by Prufrock54 <prufrock54@my-dejanews.com>
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19967.txt
Review by Fiddler

On a Valentine's day during a period when he bad been going through hell at
work, his wife had seduced him into a kitchen tryst.  Then she had
expressed the wish that they might have simultaneous orgasms.  A year later
he (sort of) fulfills her wish.

This story seems to proceed spasmodically.  There is a reason.

This is a very good story from a relatively new author.  Read it.

Ratings for "Valentine Wish"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Fiddler (appeal to reviewer): 10


"The Physics Lesson" by Allison George <allison_george@hotmail.com>
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year99/19971.txt
reviewed by Fiddler

Jenn explains complicated fluid dynamics to Kate (who sounds awfully dumb to
be taking the course) by applying it to a hot fudge sundae.  Kate responds
with the application of Bernoulli's principle to the flow of semen though a
cock.  Both examples are concretized in Kate's most recent date.

The story is both funnier and sexier than I make it sound.  There is the fun
of both the conflict between the roommates and their agreement on the
deficiencies of the male of the species.

The only fault that I find is with the weird punctuation.  This includes gobs
of high ASCII and an initial hyphen to mark quotations.

Ratings for "The Physics Lesson"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 10
Fiddler (appeal to reviewer): 10


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