
 
      


                        APRIL FOOLS! 

                             by 

                          Joe Doe


LISA IS THE VICTIM OF AN ELABORATE APRIL FOOL'S JOKE HATCHED BY 
HER DEVIOUS HUSBAND AND HIS SHERIFF BUDDY.



John leaned back in the passenger seat of the red convertible and 
closed his eyes.  The first day of April was sunny and beautiful, 
and he enjoyed the wind and the warmth on his face.

Since his wife, Lisa, was driving, he had a chance to reflect on 
all of the April Fool jokes his wife had pulled over the years.
            
There was the time that she had left a message with his company's 
gossipy receptionist that "until John goes to the VD clinic, he's 
not getting any from me!"

She had also put the "Playpen" magazines in the backseat of his 
car the day he'd volunteered to drive the nuns to the airport.

And he would never forget the time that she had told those guys 
in the gay bar that he was a homosexual.

Yes, Lisa was quite a card. 
             
She played a lame joke every year, but John rarely retaliated.  
Unlike Lisa's silly stunts, John's elaborate pranks always 
involved careful setups and memorable results.  She had deep 
exhibitionist fantasies, but she was always too shy to act them 
out.  His occasional April Fool pranks gave him a chance to make 
her most erotic fantasies reality.

When Lisa was arrested for DUI, he bribed an administrator at 
the local college to transform her "community service assignment" 
into a stint as a nude figure model for an "art class" of leering 
football jocks.
         
It had taken months for John to train that stray dog to rip the 
pink bikini off the mannequin, but the look on Lisa's face that 
day at the beach had been worth it. 

And of course there was the time he deserted her after daring her 
to skinny dip in the Forest Preserve.  She was furious, but the 
three male rangers who walked her back to the campsite with her 
hands cuffed behind her back didn't seem to mind a bit.

She may have hated the fantasies while they were happening, but 
John's efforts were always rewarded in the end with months of hot 
steamy sex.

He had ignored this year's lame entry of a snake in his shaving 
kit and decided to show her that there were no hard feelings by 
taking her out for a picnic in the country.  She LOVED to go on 
picnics, and, as fate would have it, April 1 was the first decent 
day of spring.  She had practically skipped down the front steps 
with her picnic basket and jumped into her car.

She was beautiful, intelligent, and wonderful, and John knew that 
he was lucky to have her.

He was also lucky that his old Army buddy, Leroy, was a sheriff 
out in the boonies.  Lisa had always fantasized about being strip 
searched, and John had spent many an evening playing "bad cop" to 
her "innocent motorist."  She loved watching "Women in Prison" 
movies, and all John had to do to light Lisa's fire was to whisper 
the magic words in her ear, "Drop `em and spread!"

When John told Leroy about Lisa's fantasies and showed him her 
picture, he eagerly volunteered to help.
 
Given Lisa's fascination with lame practical jokes, picking the 
date was easy: April 1.

Leroy also was black, which would give Lisa a chance to explore 
her fantasies of interracial sex.  She'd been born in South 
Carolina, and, while she was not exactly a racist, there was a 
color line that she never dared cross.  Of course, in her 
"helpless jailbird" fantasies, John often found himself telling 
Lisa to get her "snotty white ass" on the table. 

John smiled, confident in the knowledge that Leroy would make a 
more convincing black sheriff than he ever could.  Especially 
when he dropped his pants....

John looked over at the odometer and smiled.  He had taken her 
wallet out of her purse and hidden it under the car seat that 
morning, which meant that she was now cruising down the road 
doing 70 MPH with no license and no ID. 
    
She was singing along with the radio, totally oblivious to the 
fact that Leroy's squad car was already trailing them, preparing 
to strike.

Leroy had invited John back to the station for a tour a few nights 
before, and the two of them had hatched their plan together.  

After their arrest, Lisa and John would be separated, and John 
would watch through the one-way mirror as Lisa was photographed, 
fingerprinted, and brusquely interrogated by the matron at the 
jail.
  
John smiled as imagined his pretty wife squirming in her chair 
as the matron badgered her with humiliating questions:

"Are you now using or have you ever used illegal drugs?

"Do you now have or have you ever had a sexually transmitted 
disease?

"Are you pregnant?

"When was the last time you had your period?

"Have you ever taken money in exchange for sexual services?"

Of course, once the questions were answered, Lisa would be led 
into exam room one for the actual intake procedure.  The one-way 
mirror would offer John a perfect view of the "cruel" matron 
putting his wife put through her paces.  And he knew that the 
look on her face when the butch matron told her to "shuck off 
them clothes" would be simply priceless.

He'd watched Lisa put on her skimpiest lingerie that morning.  
She had thought she would be making love with John in the picnic 
grove, not modeling her pretty unmentionables for a fat bull dyke 
policewoman!

John and Leroy had told the matron to base her role on the 
Women-in-Prison movies that Lisa loved.  They had even coached 
her on the cheesy dialogue:

"Don't get shy with me, honey buns; strip off the undies too!

"Now squat!

"Now stand up, and then squat again, only faster.  We need to 
loosen up that tight little twat of yours.

"Now bend over and spread `em.  I want to see what you had for 
breakfast!"

Fortunately the butch matron was a natural, and she required very 
little coaching.  John knew that, when the tubby lesbian guard 
methodically slipped on her tight plastic glove, Lisa would orgasm 
on the spot.
  
Or have a heart attack.  

Or both.

He realized that, by using the same keywords that they used in 
their fantasies, he risked spoiling the surprise.  In truth, he 
knew that, given the date, Lisa might suspect that she was a 
victim of an April 1 joke, but he wanted to provide just enough 
evidence to keep her guessing. 

Would she be terrified?  Turned on?  Angry?  Amused? 

John had arranged the fantasy to play Lisa like a piano, taking 
her from the depths of fear to the heights of ecstasy and back 
again.

The cavity search would be slow and methodical, filled with 
humiliating comments and degrading commands.  The matron would 
take her time, relishing Lisa's loss of authority.

When the search was over, Leroy would casually stroll in while 
Lisa was washing herself in the large, curtainless shower area.
            
He would make a point of slowly running his eyes up and down the 
stark naked prisoner standing only a few feet away from him, but, 
in general, he would act like her nudity was no big deal.  Her 
humiliation would be treated as a casual part of a routine 
procedure, and she would be reduced to being just another notch 
on the Sheriff's belt. 

After a few seconds of ogling Lisa like a hunk of meat, Leroy 
would chat with the matron about Lisa's "disposal."

John knew that Leroy's casual attitude about Lisa's nudity would 
be a key part of the fantasy.  As the arresting officer, he would 
have seen her in her expensive sports car and would know that she 
was a sophisticated woman of means and quality. 

The fact that the lowly black civil servant was able to casually 
amble into the shower area where Lisa was soaping up her lithe, 
naked form would reinforce the fact that she was no longer a 
successful career woman in an expensive sports car.  She was now 
just a cute, feckless honky jailbird forced to shower in front of 
the all-powerful black Sheriff.

While the naked and helpless Lisa continued her degrading shower, 
Leroy and the butch matron would chatter about Lisa's new life on 
the prison farm.  Occasionally they would glance over at their 
blushing victim, but, in general, they would act like she wasn't 
even there.

The gist of the conversation would revolve around the horrors 
Lisa would face at the prison farm.  The backbreaking labor, the 
warden's prostitution ring, the predatory lesbian inmates, and the 
sadistic, strap-happy guards would all be discussed in Technicolor 
detail.

When the matron left, Leroy would offer Lisa a choice.  In 
exchange for "servicing" him, she would be given "protection" on 
the prison farm.  But, if she refused, then "the dykes in the 
barracks are going to be breaking in a new bitch tonight."

John laughed at the thought of his sassy wife getting down on her 
knees and taking Leroy's enormous black tool in her dainty mouth.  
Lisa always refused to swallow at home, but John knew the threat 
of a lesbian gangbang at the prison farm would make her lick her 
lips and beg for more.

When John confided in Leroy that he had been unable to impregnate 
Lisa for the last few months because of his low sperm count, Leroy 
immediately suggested that he blackmail Lisa into having 
unprotected sex with him.

He would tease her by starting to put on a condom.  Then he would 
change his mind, announcing, "Since you're from South Carolina, I 
think you need a little lesson in racial justice!" 

"White masters used to fill their black wenches full of little 
pickaninnies.  So tonight, white girl, you're riding BAREBACK!"

In fact, Leroy had had a vasectomy 3 years before, but, while he 
was fucking Lisa, he wouldn't mention that.  Instead, he would 
brag about the 6 children he had fathered, and the herds of "white 
trash" he had left "barefoot and pregnant" out on the prison farm.

Lisa would be bent over on all fours in the "bitch breeding" 
position.  And he would casually toss the condom that could have 
protected her on the floor in front of her, so that she could 
stare longingly at it as he fucked her.  He would remind her that, 
without the condom, she'll be walking out of the prison farm a 
year from now with a "little black bastard sucking on your tit."

He would take his time, teasing her by asking if she wanted him 
to "pull out" before he "knocked her up good."  Lisa would, of 
course, beg for mercy, which would make it all the more delicious 
when Leroy shot his hot cum deep inside her.

John had designed her "Bimbo Jailbird" outfit himself: white 
crop-top t-shirt with a number on the front and the words COUNTY 
PRISON on the back, plain white cotton panties, cheap sneakers, 
ankle high white socks, and blue jean cutoff shorts. 

It was Leroy's idea to put her in the cage in the front of the 
jail and make her wait for transport to the prison.  Of course, 
everyone who came in and out of the busy jail would see her 
sitting in her cute little outfit, and Leroy had no doubt that 
quite a few smirks and cutting remarks would be thrown her way.

Lisa was a staunch feminist, who bristled at derogatory remarks.  
And John was delighted when Leroy told him that he planned to pick 
up a group of illegal immigrants the day she was arrested.  John 
imagined the crude foreigners taunting her from the neighboring 
cell.  He knew she would blush deliciously as they lewdly 
appraised her assets.

After a few hours, Leroy would shackle Lisa's pretty arms and legs 
and march his humiliated prisoner down the street to the large 
prison van parked a few blocks away.  John smiled as he visualized 
the looks his braless wife would get as she was paraded down the 
street with her hands cuffed behind her back.  Would Lisa be more 
embarrassed by the lustful stares of the men or the angry ones 
from their wives and girlfriends?

John would be waiting for her in the prison van, of course, and 
reveal the joke by shouting "APRIL FOOL!"  

He had taken care to warn Leroy that he should keep Lisa's arms 
cuffed safely behind her back and her legs shackled until she 
calmed down.  
            
After all, it might have been April 1, but John was no fool.



Edited by C. Lakewood



 
