Celestial Reviews 127 - October 19, 1996

Note:  A correspondent has mentioned to me that he has a very large 
number of stories (“about a gig”) archived, which he would like to 
share with someone who would be willing to repost the good ones.  If 
anyone wants to take him up on this offer, let me know, and I’ll put 
you in contact with him.

- Celeste

      “Vamps" by Michael K. Smith (romance)
            10, 9, 9
      “Winning Through Intimidation” by J. Boswell. (wife
            watching) 9.5, 7, 7
      “Wind Chimes” by RC (hypnosis) 10, 9, 8
      “Horsewash” by Unknown Author (bestiality) 9, 9, 9
      “The Brady Bunch”  by Uncle Mike (sitcom orgy) 10, 9, 9
      “JJ and Me” by JTM9x (college sex) 8, 9, 9
      “For Him” by Uther Pendragon (sex slave for a day) 
            10, 10, 10

“Vamps” by Michael K. Smith (mksmith@metronet.com).  I am a member of 
that small minority of Americans who believe that there are no real 
vampires in the world.  At least none that look like humans and require 
human blood for sustenance or recreation or whatever.  Therefore, I 
appreciate it when an author gives me some concise background 
information on the ground rules for vampires in his story, and this 
author performs that service nicely.

Vampires live long lives, but they retain their youthful appearance.  
They can also exercise control over the minds of the humans around 
them.  They blend into the midst of the human race by taking on various 
jobs or roles in society.  One of the interesting aspects of this story 
is that Maya, the female vamp, has spent the last several decades 
concealed as a nun in a Cistercian convent.  Maya is young (hardly more 
than a hundred years old) and sexually unsophisticated; and so the 
narrator (a male vamp several centuries old) takes her under wing.  
{It’s hard to tell this story without an accidental pun now and then.}

The story is somewhat complex.  Graeme (our narrator) meets Maya on a 
Brazilian beach that is frequented by vampires.  Graeme and Maya take 
into their apartment a vulnerable Brazilian, non-vampire girl who 
appears to be about 14 years old.  They engage in numerous sexual 
pleasantries.  But then we discover that the ways of vampires and of 
humans are not completely compatible.

Ratings for “Vamps”
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9

“Winning Through Intimidation” by J. Boswell.  Jim’s long-lost brother 
(actually cousin) comes to visit after an absence of nearly 20 years.  
He fucks Jim’s wife regularly during the week-long visit; and she loves 
it.  Jim’s daughter Cindy also hastens to her uncle’s bed.  There’s 
really not much to this story - macho man humps wimp’s wife and 
daughter while wimp stands by; but it’s well written and somewhat 
interesting story about dysfunctional people.

Ratings for “Winning Through Intimidation”
Athena (technical quality): 9.5
Venus (plot & character): 7
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 7

“Wind Chimes” by RC (74734.271@CompuServe).  Laurie uses her wind 
chimes on a peaceful evening to hypnotize and seduce Pretty Jane.  The 
description of the hypnosis procedure is celarly written and, I 
suppose, interesting - but not if one has seen too many similar 
hypnosis scenes recently.  I think you’ll like this story a lot more if 
you have NOT recently read four or five well-written hypnosis stories.

Ratings for “Wind Chimes”
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8

“Horsewash” by Unknown Author (mcg-mcg@bartra.demon.co.uk).  The sweet 
young lady is washing her horse.  After completing her ablutions, she 
has sex with the animal.  I’m not an expert; but I’m not sure it is 
even possible to do what this woman does.  It borders on a circus act - 
a very lewd circus act, to say the least.  The language bounces from 
the poetic to the grammatically incoherent - nice participial absolute 
phrases mixed with dangling modifiers.  Nevertheless, I found this 
story interesting.

The story is posted by Merrill, Castle and Gray (UK).  These people 
claim to have a list of 7000 stories, and it appears that they are 
willing to send them to people for free.  I have not received stories 
directly from them; but I did recognize several good stories on their 
list.  I plan to review a few more of their stories in the next few 
issues of Celestial Reviews.  You can e-mail ‘list-
mcg@bartra.demon.co.uk' for an up-to-date list of their publications

Ratings for “Horsewash”
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9

 “The Brady Bunch”  by Uncle Mike. (fr582@cleveland.Freenet.Edu) This 
story raises an interesting question: “What kind of architect would 
make the six kids in his blended family share one bathroom?" 

The basic plot of this series centered around the minor problems the 
three boys and three girls hve getting along with each other.  This 
week’s episode is no exception.  While Bobby and Greg are raping Marcia 
in the shower, she slips and accidentally impales her cunt on Peter’s 
rigid cock.  Meanwhile, Greg loses his balance, and his penis 
inadvertently slips firmly into Marcia’s mouth.  Imagine that.  
Stranger things have happened on American sitcoms.  This turns out to 
be such a pleasant experience that Marcia simply has to share her 
pleasure with her sister Jan.  So she sends Cindy (who is to young for 
this sort of thing) to sleep with Mom (and presumably with Dad) and 
then goes to work on Jan.  Soon we have Marcia sitting on Jan’s face 
while one guy has a cock buried in Jan’s cunt and the other has his 
rammed down Marcia’s throat.  Then Mom opens the door and catches them, 
but she just joins in.  That’s how they all became the Brady Bunch.  
Sing along now: That’s how they all became the Brady Bunch - the Brady 
Bunch!

Ratings for “The Brady Bunch”
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9

“JJ and Me” by JTM9x (jtm9x@aol.com).  The narrator has gone back to 
college after a few years in the workforce.  He has a waterbed.  JJ is 
a vivacious young lady who works in the leasing office. She comes by 
one night to help break in the waterbed.  He is unable to cum the 
fourth time; but that’s OK, since he has run out of holes anyway.  
There’s not really a deep plot to this story, but it’s pretty hot 
stuff.

Ratings for “JJ and Me”
Athena (technical quality): 8
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9

“For Him” by Uther Pendragon (nobody@flame.alias.net).  The man and 
woman don’t have a lot of money, since he is a college student and she 
is holding down a job to help keep him that way.  So they usually make 
each other presents.  This year she asks what he would like for his 
birthday, and he suggests that she be his sex slave for a day.  She 
agrees; and she enjoys the experience even more than he does.

Some bdsm enthusiasts may find this story objectionable.  That’s 
because the participants say they are practicing sex slavery, but they 
don’t do the things that bdsm lovers usually do.  On the other hand, 
maybe some bdsm enthusiasts will like this story.  I assume they can be 
broadminded enough to accept the notion that people can be dominant and 
submissive in completely “unorthodox” ways that border on really 
friendly sexual activity.

As an incurable romantic with an insatiable sex drive, I loved this 
story.  I like it when a sexy story makes me laugh, and this one 
accomplished that with lines like this, from the master to the slave:

    "Jeanette, if you were to escape into another state, is that state 
required to return you to me?"
    "Mr. Calhoun says 'yes.'  Mr. Lincoln says 'no.'"

That’s not true, of course. Lincoln never attacked the fugitive slave 
laws. He specifically endorsed them in Congress and after being elected 
President.  Well, anyway - it was funny in the context.

The story displays a large amount of inside humor, when the lovers talk 
about their past experiences and about what they have been reading.  
For example, not all readers will catch the connection between 
Juneteenth and the plot of this story, and I’m certainly not going to 
tell you.  But even if I didn’t fully understand all the allusions, I 
thoroughly enjoyed the fondness and bantering between two people who 
were obviously in love.

Ratings for “For Him”
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

