Celestial Reviews 259 - February 18, 1998

Note:  There's this guy who went to this camp for "adults." So the owner 
is showing him around and says, "You're gonna love it here, especially 
the barrel behind the restrooms. When you feel the need, stick you're 
dick in the hole for a blowjob."

So the next day the guy sees the owner, and says, "This place is great! 
I'm going to use that barrel every day." 

The owner says, "Every day except Mondays." 

"Why not on Mondays?" 

"That's your day in the barrel."

Final note: Remember: even though someone else may be posting my reviews 
for me, my e-mail address is still Celeste801@aol.com.

- Celeste

      "St. Valentine's Day!   'Oh, I would like to fall in love so 
much!'" 
            by Milos Bogdanovic (holy harangue) 7, 5, 3
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8461.txt
      "In the Booth" by Mark Aster (sex fantasies) 10, 10, 10
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8505.txt
      "A Matter of Pride" by Lord Malinov (rendezvous) 10, 8, 8
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8500.txt
      "Through the Fence" by Mr. Maquido (voyeurism) 9, 9, 9
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8512.txt
      "The Bedroom Window" by Sandman (Celestial follow-up)
            10, 10, 10
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8433.txt
      "Seat of Power" by Jay Croft (Celestial follow-up) 10, 10, 10
      "Interracial Sex Story" by Zifferman (silly rape story)
            5, 4, 2
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8349.txt

Guest Reviews: 

      "Get with the Program" by Phil Phantom (incest, pedophillia, 
            humiliation, and spanking) 9, 9, - / 10, 8, - / 10, 7, -
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8508.txt
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8511.txt
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8507.txt
      "Amazing Grace" by LeAnn (sex at a party) 8.4, 9.6, 9.4
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8165.txt
      "Kyle's Continuing Sexual Adventures - Club-F" - by "Not Me" 
            (orgies) 7, 6, 4
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8311.txt
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8312.txt
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8327.txt
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8315.txt
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8317.txt
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8316.txt
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8313.txt
      "Twin Trouble" by Dastardly Dave (sexual awakening)
            8, 8, 7
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8459.txt
      "Wendy" by Friar Dave (sex with young girl) 10, 10, 10
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8497.txt
      "Mandy" by Darkman (Incest, pedophilia and videotape)
            8, 8, -
          http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/8498.txt

"St. Valentine's Day!   'Oh, I would like to fall in love so much!' " by 
Milos Bogdanovic (milos@net.yu).  I originally read this "story" on 
Valentine's Day, expecting a romance of some sort.  What I found instead 
is an essay that seems to be denouncing the underlying value system 
displayed on the a.s.s. newsgroup.

What's refreshing about this story is that it demonstrates that at least 
some of the people who object to us a perverts write every bit as badly 
as some of the very worst writers who post stories on this newsgroup.

I suspect that what we have here is a leftover essay from a religion 
class.  "I wrote the damned thing, and so I might as well gain Merit in 
heaven by posting it where these perverts can see it.  Praise the Lord!"

The author gives us a diatribe against "selfish love."  But he shows no 
awareness that eroticism and pleasure have a natural appeal to human 
beings or that fantasies differ from reality.  He presents a very 
stilted description of "true love," making it sound like the sort of 
thing that ugly, old people might decide to do when they can't find any 
adventure in their lives.  And he manages to do all this without any 
cohesiveness to his arguments.

Anyway, this "story" is not worth reading - whether you're looking for a 
sex story or for a reasonable discussion of human sexuality. However, on 
the brighter side, this story gives me the opportunity to tell you this 
story:

Three couples (an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple, and a young 
newlywed couple) wanted to join a church.
 
The pastor said, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You 
must abstain from having sex for two weeks."
 
The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks.
 
The pastor went to the elderly couple and asked, "Were you able to 
abstain from sex for the two weeks?"  The old man replied, "No problem 
at all, Pastor."
 
"Congratulations!  Welcome to the church!" said the pastor.
 
The pastor asked the middle-aged couple, "Well, were you able to abstain 
from sex for the two weeks?"  The man replied, "The first week was not 
too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of 
nights; but, yes we made it."
 
"Congratulations!  Welcome to the church!" said the pastor.
 
The pastor then asked the newlywed couple, "Were you able to abstain 
from sex for two weeks?"  "No, Pastor, we were not able to go without 
sex for the two weeks," the young man replied sadly.
 
"What happened?" inquired the pastor.
 
"My wife was reaching for a can of corn on the top shelf and dropped it. 
When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took 
advantage of her right there."
 
"You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our 
church," stated the pastor.
 
"We know," said the young man. "We're not welcome at Safeway anymore 
either."

Ratings for "St. Valentine's Day!"
Athena (technical quality): 7
Venus (plot & character): 5
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 3

"In the Booth" by Mark Aster (MyFrThAl@aol.com).  The main criticism of 
this story is that it is incoherent.  The author jumps from one plot to 
another with no apparent character development.  Normally, that would 
mean that this is a bad story; but this time that makes this a good 
story.  Why?  Well, I can't tell you.

I wish I had been allowed to say things like that preceding paragraph on 
my literature exams back in high school and college.  The instructor 
would read the paper and say, "Great! A+."

Well, the short answer is that there's a reason for the incoherence, and 
it has something to do with the booth in the title.  This is another 
good but short story.

Ratings for "In the Booth"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

"A Matter of Pride" by Lord Malinov (malinov@mindless.com). I suppose if 
publishers can have a "Book of the Month Club," then Lord Malinov can 
have a Short Story of the Day Club.  He has been churning out a story 
per day for the past month or so, and they have all been of high 
quality.  This one does not break the streak.

Kevin is sitting in a bar, apparently waiting for someone to arrive.  He 
is visiting the city and hopes to meet Carla, an old girlfriend..  While 
he waits, he fantasizes about another woman who also seems to be waiting 
for someone.

This story is short on really explicit sex and long on implicit sex.  
It's still a pretty good story!

Ratings for "A Matter of Pride"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 8
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8

"Through the Fence" by Mr. Maquido (maquido@hotmail.com).  This is the 
pilot story in a series entitled "Neighbors," which is a about two 
couples who live in a small community in Texas.  In this episode Alan 
has arrived home early from a business trip.  He plans to shower quickly 
and hurry off to his health club, where he will lust after the lewd and 
lascivious Barbara who wears a skintight body suit that makes him cum in 
the showers after his workout.  But before Alan leaves the house he is 
distracted by his neighbor, Alice, who has never even seen a porn movie 
but is now sunbathing and having naughty fantasies.  His wife comes home 
and catches Alan in his voyeurism; but instead of being upset, she just 
joins him.

I suppose we'll meet Alice's husband Tom in a future episode.

This story had some rough edges, but it offers promise of an interesting 
series.

Ratings for "Through the Fence"
Athena (technical quality): 9
Venus (plot & character): 9
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9

"The Bedroom Window" by Sandman (sandman@bitsmart.com).  Sandman's 
stories are archived at 
ftp://asstr.ml.org/pub/Authors/sandman/index.html.

This is the first author to accept my invitation to post a "Chapter 2" 
of my "Review" story that first appeared as a review of DG's "Call of 
Desire."  You might more fully enjoy this and the following story if you 
first read my original story, which is archived at 
http://www.qz.to/erotica/assm/Year98/7611.txt.

The present story assumes that there was a pair of voyeurs outside my 
window while I was writing the review and while my husband was coming on 
to me - or cumming onto me.  While they watch us, they make whoopee 
themselves.  At one point we have my husband fucking me in the ass while 
I am talking to Rose on the phone and the voyeur husband is fucking his 
wife doggie style outside the window.  Then they decide to go home and 
give me a phone call.

I am not certain how this story would do as a stand-alone, but I 
certainly did enjoy it in the context of my previous story.

This author seems to know me too well.  I think from now on I'll slant 
my blinds up instead of down when I close them at night.

Ratings for "The Bedroom Window"
Athena (technical quality): 10
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

"Seat of Power" by Jay Croft (paladin_cs@email.msn.com).  This is 
another follow-up to my "Review" of DG's "Call of Desire."  In this 
case, Rose has hung up the phone and has gone to watch "Bonanza" on the 
Family Channel to get my debauchery out of her mind.  {For those of you 
who don't know, "Bonanza" was an American "western" series of about 30 
years ago, which focused on the life of Hop Sing, a Chinese cook and 
housekeeper whose wealthy employers were constantly either getting 
amnesia or falling in love with women who died during each weekly 
episode.}

At this point we are treated to a flashback, when Rose and her cousin 
Martha were eleven-year-olds taking a shower together.  Martha had 
accidentally pushed her finger up her own ass a little and had groaned 
pleasantly.  When Rose questioned her, Martha challenged her to "try it 
and see" how good it felt.  At this moment in her sexual awakening, what 
Rose really needed was a better command of English grammar.  Try WHAT 
and see?  Into whose asshole should Rose have inserted the finger in the 
next hundred words of the story?  Overwhelmed by the grammatical 
ambiguity, perhaps, they try both of the above.

However, Rose's childhood sexuality is quickly terminated by Sister Mary 
Tight Ass, who assures her students that touching oneself in the shower 
is a perversion.

Seeking redemption after all those years, Rose visits me {Celeste} the 
morning after the phone call.  The bitch has recorded her conversation 
with me, and she threatens to turn the tape over to the school 
authorities unless I help her resolve her anal fixation.  Although I'm a 
bit miffed at first, eventually I discover that Rose isn't such a bad 
person after all.  In the end I am happy to lend a helping hand.  As you 
can well imagine, that previous sentence has a double meaning.

Unlike the previous story, this one doesn't match up quite so well with 
my real-life personality or with the persona I would like to convey in 
fiction about me.  For example, I don't often drink wine in the morning 
or have anyone or anything named Skye living in my house. B-cup or small 
C, indeed!  Vibrators and dildoes in a shoe box under the bed!  Wouldn't 
it be better to keep them on the shelf in the headboard, right behind 
the massage lotions?

I'm kidding!  This is another very good story. I am not certain how this 
story would do as a stand-alone, but I certainly did enjoy it in the 
context of my own story.

Ratings for "Seat of Power"
Athena (technical quality): 9.5
Venus (plot & character): 10
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10

"Interracial Sex Story" by Zifferman (zifferman@aol.com).  This author 
has written some good stories, but this one borders on illiterate 
drivel.  A man and wife go to a remote cabin, where three black escaped 
convicts rape the wife. Mary ends up becoming pregnant and having a 
"basterd black baby."  John leaves Mary, so that she can satisfy her 
desires for black cock, which were acquired during her pleasant rape 
sequence with the three monster cocks.  Isn't that special!

The narrative reads more like a summary than a story, and it's riddled 
with silly and distracting grammatical errors.  I can't imagine what 
would possess a good author to write crap like this.  I suspect his 
teenage son, perhaps motivated by a desire to promote interracial 
harmony, has snuck onto Zifferman's computer and posted this superficial 
adolescent fantasy.

Ratings for "Interracial Sex Story"
Athena (technical quality):.5
Venus (plot & character): 4
Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 2

"Get with the Program" by Phil Phantom (slutmissy@hotmail.com). Guest 
review by Sandman (sandman@bitsmart.com).

Before I begin the review, I need to warn you that the subject matter of 
this story falls outside my personal tastes and preferences.  The story 
contains incest (mother/son, mother/daughter, father/daughter, 
brother/sister), pedophilia, humiliation, and spanking.  There is no 
appeal to reviewer for me with this story; and so I will analyze it 
based on technical quality and plot alone, with no recommendation to 
either read or avoid this story.

"Get with the Program" is actually three stories with the same title. 
All the stories revolve around a central plot:  A family arrives at a 
camp where the man and woman are expected to "service" the guests; in 
reality the son and daughter are expected to do this as well.

What Phil has done with this story is explore differing tones and 
slightly different scenarios.  In a sense the author is playing what-ifs 
with the same general idea:  What if the family decides to go with the 
flow, what if the mother is reluctant, what if the circumstances are 
more life-threatening?  This is actually a pretty good idea; and 
although the possibility is there for the reader to get bored, each 
story is different enough to keep things interesting.

Plot #1: Karen and Bill Smith have taken a new job at a camp.  Their 
duties involve fucking anyone, anytime, any way a guest wants it.  That 
may be their job, but the story focuses specifically on breaking in 
their daughter Jenny to handle these duties as well.  Jenny is the only 
one who resists these strange new ideas and her parents' inexplicable 
new attitude, at least at first.  Eventually everyone relaxes and has a 
good time.

The story is fairly hard to read at first with many "he said," "I said." 
and few transitions to smooth the reading; but the reading does get 
easier later on as the author warms up.   The plot serves only as an 
excuse for the sex, which is not necessarily a bad thing in a sex story.

Plot #2: Again this is the same general plot, but this time the story 
focuses on the stepmother, Karen.  Karen is the reluctant one this time 
and attempts to shield Jenny from the harsh facts of life. Unfortunately 
Jenny is tagging along during Karen's physical, which gets 
extraordinarily physical when Karen's examiner starts royally fucking 
her. For those who like pain and punishment this story ends with a 
rather explicit cunt spanking. 

There were no false starts with this plot variation, and so the reading 
remained easy. The first plot offered a conclusion by allowing a change 
in one of the characters.  That gives plot #1 a sense of finality and 
closure.  In this story Karen begins reluctant and ends reluctant -- 
there is no sense of closure.  Again the plot serves as an excuse for 
the sex, and again this is not necessarily a bad thing in a sex story.

Plot #3: In both of the previous plots Karen begins the story relating 
how she was beaten by Helen, the proprietor.  This third story begins 
with a first hand account of that.  As in Plot #2, Karen plays her part 
reluctantly, this time with more urgency and terror, again at least at 
first.  This time the family is forced to perform for the guests, 
beginning with auctioning off Jenny's clothing piece by piece to the 
highest bidder in a public auction (something which Jenny finds 
humiliating enough to inspire tears).   The subsequent shows involve the 
husband/father taking Jenny's virginity and Karen fucking her son, for 
the audience, of course.  

Again the reading was smooth.  There is actually very little explicit 
sex in this one, the thrill coming only in the humiliation and power 
plays.  The author did a fairly good job at stressing the urgency and 
terror Karen was feeling at the beginning of the story, but in a single 
sentence at the end undoes this without adequate buildup to explain the 
abrupt shift in Karen's attitude.  If the last sentence had been deleted 
this would have been a far more consistent story; and that one sentence 
is the difference between a 7 and an 8 in plot & character.

As I conclude, I feel compelled to point out the author uses no blank 
lines between paragraphs and dialog lines.  Please, guys - space is not 
a valuable commodity to be hoarded.  A single blank line between 
paragraphs and dialog lines makes for a far more readable story.   

A final note before we move on to raw scores.  Appeal to reviewer does 
influence Venus.  I suggest you use the text of this review to base your 
decision on whether or not to read these stories rather than the 
numerical scores.  Also, since I do consider these three separate 
stories, I have included three separate scores, the first score is for 
the first story, the second score is for the second story, and the third 
score for the third story.

Athena (technical quality): 9, 10, 10
Venus (plot & character): 9, 8, 7
Sandman (appeal to reviewer): (This space intentionally left blank)

"Amazing Grace" by LeAnn (kalika@main.provost.msu.edu).  Guest review by 
Jubjub.

Story Summary:  Sexual encounter at a party

This story is hot--very hot.  The first couple of stories that I 
reviewed had some interesting ideas but poor execution.  This story has 
an interesting idea AND some very hot descriptions.  A little bit of 
proofreading would make this story a model of how a story should be 
written.

First, there were some minor punctuation problems.  There were also a 
couple of garbled sentences.  But these didn't pose any readability 
problems.  The only major problem arose from the asides.  There were 
four of them.  Two were okay, but the other two were jarring.  A 
recommendation to this author and any other author: if you think your 
getting cute, you are.  Don't do it.  It tends to kill the flow of the 
story.

Beyond these minor problems, I felt the story started a bit sluggishly. 
If I hadn't been a reviewer, I probably would not have read past the 
first paragraph.  In fact, it occurs to me that I might have read this 
story earlier and DID stop reading after the first paragraph or two. But 
the action picks up later.  There is a shift in the story that compels 
me not to divulge details, but suffice it to say this story really got 
me going once the main characters were introduced.

The story shift is interesting and doesn't have anything to do with BDSM 
or rape or anything like that.  The story is good clean sex, and I hope 
the writer keeps writing.

Technical:  8.4  Very good, but not near perfect
Characterization and Plot:  9.6  Very good characterization and 
      plot flow
Appeal: 9.4  I got hard--very hard

"Kyle's Continuing Sexual Adventures - Club-F"  by "Not Me" 
(sansidee@hotmail.com).  Guest review by Kim.

This is a seven-part story, that from the title, seems to suggest a 
longer series than what is being reviewed here. It tells, not 
surprisingly, of the adventures of the eponymous Kyle. From the opening 
dialog, it may be that Kyle is forty four years old, but it's not really 
clear.

The general theme of the story is Kyle's joining a fitness club, the 
Club-F of the title. But this is no ordinary fitness club, as the "F" 
really stands for fucking. And that's pretty much what Kyle does for 
most of the story.

He is aided in his adventures by the rather fortunate system of mind 
altering drugs that the club injects into the air conditioning. The drug 
makes people horny and then forgetful. Such that all the patrons of the 
club, on walking through the door, jump on each other like rabbits, and 
then conveniently forget about the rampant coupling two hours later. All 
except Kyle, who is immune to the forgetful bit. Still with me?

By now you're probably thinking this is some kind of parody, right? 
Wrong! -- this is straight down the line. Soon Kyle is screwing the 
membership representative, Jody, then a couple of members, Shelly and 
Andrea, whom he charms by the somewhat unusual method of giving himself 
a blowjob (yep, you read that right), and finally an old friend, 
Chelsea, whom he introduces to the delights of the club, but later 
decides to settle down with and move out of state, thus leaving the club 
Kyleless.

All in all, a pretty strange mix really. The sex is relentless, with 
fucking and sucking and such, on every page of the story. The plot, such 
as it is, seems to change direction each time a new character is 
introduced, and the whole thing doesn't seem to know if it's a mind 
control story or not. I think "odd" is a good word to describe it.

Personally I found the sex desperately boring. The beginning seemed like 
a juvenile fantasyland, and just didn't press any of my buttons. The 
threeway got kinda hot at times, but the finale, with Chelsea, seemed to 
have wandered in from another story. All things considered, not very 
appealing, I'm afraid.

Comments on this review to Ghost@nym.alias.net

Ratings for "Kyle's Continuing Sexual Adventures - Club-F" 
Athena (technical quality): 7 (Technically readable but pretty 
      lame really)
Venus (plot & character): 6 (Complete mishmash of a plot)
Kim (appeal to reviewer): 4 (Could see little merit in it, sorry)

"Twin Trouble" by Dastardly Dave (posted by abekl@ibm.net). Guest review 
by BillyG.

The story "Twin Trouble" as posted in the current a.s.s.m. newsgroup 
states that it has been spell checked and reformatted.  I suspect the 
former is true but the reformatting must apply to early portion of the 
story only.  That latter is mostly long, unbroken paragraphs.  Those of 
you who prefer the pacing and timing of a well-formatted story, who 
prefer the organization afforded by the white spaces, may stumble in the 
second half of this tale.  That's too bad, for the story suffers from 
it.

As well, the first chapter really constitutes an acceptable, even sweet 
story and it might well have ended there.  The engaging plausibility and 
the intimacy are both diluted substantively by the introduction of two 
many horny young girls, all of whom are improbably hot and hungry for 
the young man's body.  

In brief, this is am initially-believable, later-unlikely story of 
sexual awakening of a brother and a sister, young teens and twins as it 
happens.  The setting is a farm in the South where the siblings 
"discover" each other in the barn.  That works reasonably well, but the 
remainder of the story rambles and attempts to achieve erotic appeal 
largely by numbers.  If one girl is sexy, four more often is not, 
especially eleven-year-old nymphets.

Actually, this looks like several stories, the first of which is worth 
reading while the remainder should be expurgated.  As it stands, the 
story's 17,000 words could stand a major trimming.  

Ratings for "Twin Trouble"
Athena (technical quality): 8  - Initially a 10, but fades rapidly
Venus (plot & character): 8  - Same take
BillyG(appeal to reviewer): 7 - A major trimming and reformatting
      recommended

"Wendy" by Friar Dave (friar_dave@mhbbs.com). Guest Review by Sandman 
(sandman@bitsmart.com).

Again I must warn you that this story falls outside of my normal 
personal tastes and preferences.  The story contains a very explicit 
incest scene between a 14-year-old brother and his 12-year-old sister, 
as well as graphic pedophilia descriptions between the 12-year-old girl 
and an adult male.  

Dan (the narrator) is more than thrilled to find the beautiful Marge 
moving in next door to him and being a normal, red-blooded male tries in 
vain to win her affections.  As is the case with all of Friar Dave's 
stories the characters are painstakingly developed.  Before any one hops 
into the sack the reader KNOWS these people and when the sex happens it 
makes sense.

Dan is asked by Marge to help assemble a grill for a party she is having 
later that evening and Dan, still eager to win her affections willingly 
accepts the task.  When Marge has to step out and Dan explores the house 
to find a cool drink he stumbles on Wendy, Marge's twelve-year-old 
daughter giving Josh, Marge's fourteen year old son a rather 
professional blow job.  Naturally Dan is turned on by this, but he 
discreetly plays dumb and returns to his job.

Wendy comes out and talks with him a bit later on and he learns that 
Marge is gay, forever putting her out of his reach.  And later that 
evening Wendy slips away from the dull party to visit Dan where she 
learns his ex-girlfriend is a porno star and goads Dan into letting her 
watch one of the tapes.  From there the story tenderly and explicitly 
describes several varied sexual positions.

In chapter 10 the story abandons the pedophilia and concentrates on a 
really interesting sex scene between Dan and Marge (who occasionally 
still indulges in men).  Again the sex makes sense and is all the more 
interesting because the characters are so vivid and real.  Unlike the 
scenes between Dan and Wendy this part did hold a very real appeal to 
me.   Chapter ten came as a salvation and redemption of sorts, there was 
an actual physical sense of relief for me as the story made this about-
face.

Reading this story for review was sort of an exercise  in extremes, I 
kept recoiling from the pedophilia but Dave's writing kept trying engage 
me, to make me a part of the story - he really is that good a writer.  I 
guess I am going to recommend this story with a warning. If pedophilia 
is your thing, by all means read the story from beginning to end.  If it 
isn't, read the first chapter then skip down to chapter 10. Here's the 
warning - if you ignore this advice you *WILL* look back on the story 
and wonder why you enjoyed reading it, wonder why when you tried to 
detach yourself you kept being drawn back into the story.  

A horror story doesn't necessarily have to have blood and monsters in 
it.  Sometimes the terror can be finding out a good author can pull you 
into a story that assaults what you consider unshakable foundations of 
your own beliefs of what is right and what is wrong. 

Athena (technical quality): 10 - a few minor mistakes but easily
      overlooked.
Venus (plot & character): 10-- The story makes sense and the sex
      is hot.
Sandman (appeal to reviewer): 10 - And I'm still asking myself why.
 
"Mandy" by Darkman (abekl@ibm.net). Guest review by Sandman 
(sandman@bitsmart.com).

Yet another warning that this story falls outside my normal tastes and 
preferences, and thankfully this time there was no appeal to reviewer as 
well.  I'm sorry, but after "Wendy" if I read another pedo piece that 
held an appeal to the reviewer I'd be checking myself into the nearest 
psychiatric hospital.  This story is rated on technical quality and plot 
alone.  It will be up to you to decide if any of this appeals to you 
enough to call up the story.

What's a father to do when on a hot summer's day jerking off while 
watching a porno flick he catches his fourteen-year-old daughter and her 
friend spying on him through the bedroom window?  Ignore it, at least 
until he finds his daughter has poked a spy hole through the bedroom 
wall.  Then it's time to scheme on how to catch her in the act of spying 
on him.  Of course he does, and this leads to a mutual masturbation 
scene where the earth, of course, moves for both of them.

Fortunately Mandy is very willing to keep this all secret so long as 
they can have more fun together.  

With this new relationship established, they move on to watching a porno 
flick a few days later.  "What the hell in for a nickel in for a dime," 
the author states as the father fingers his daughter to orgasm. There's 
some voyeuristic fun as the father watches Mandy and her girlfriend get 
each other off later that evening.  The next day they visit a park and 
the father gets so worked up he has to get some relief. Luckily the 
public restroom has a glory hole and some strange guy deep throats him 
for the best blow job he's ever gotten.  

This is a very long story and it's almost purely 100% sex scene after 
sex scene.  It's fairly safe to say there's not a character in this 
story the father does not at one point have sex with (the sex with his 
son is implied by the glory hole incident).  There's a threesome with 
the father, his neighbor, and her daughter; there's another threesome 
with the father, his wife, and their daughter.  There's a scene between 
the daughter and her friend, there's a scene between the son and the gym 
instructor.  There's a scene... well, you get the idea.

Believe it or not, underneath this non-stop sex there's an actual plot 
in the intrigue around the man's son (who definitely has problems).   It 
appears the son's gym teacher (male) has been taking liberties with the 
boy (and a dog for a bestiality scene).  The father, of course, is 
incensed by this, and at 2am the father and wife pay a visit to the man.  
The payback comes by raping the instructor's wife. Well, it starts out 
as rape, but everyone gets off in THE END.  

The main technical problems with this story is an inconsistent use of 
quotation marks around the dialog and the fact that dialog between 
multiple parties resides inside single paragraphs.  But the author does 
have a breezy writing style that's easy enough to read, even if the 
subject matter interferes with that for most people.

The story tries to have a plot (the man's son being abused by the gym 
teacher and the vengeance it inspires), but in the context of the 
inconsistency of the father abusing his own daughter the imperative for 
vengeance seems almost silly, and the end result (raping the man's wife) 
merely creates another victim.  So this story is held afloat only by the 
sex.   The sheer quantity of the sex and the fact that it's reasonably 
well written will probably be enough for the people who are into this 
genre.

To conclude, I will insert a personal note here.  Just as the father 
wanted to thrash the man buggering his son, I could not help but note 
the irony; for I very much hoped Child Protection Services would burst 
on the scene and thrash the father around for a few hours, then insert 
him into a transgender/mind-control/misogynistic(*) story where this 
walking penis would no longer be a threat to his neighbors, his family, 
or my sensibilities. {Sigh}   So much for objectivity.

(*) Hatred of women.  Bronwen's usage of the word forced me to look it 
up and I've been wanting to use it ever since.  Hey, after three 
straight pedo reviews, right now I'll take any redeeming quality I can 
find or create!

Sandman's Ratings of "Mandy"
Athena (technical quality): 8    -- Needs to handle dialog better.
Venus (plot & character): 8     -- Non-stop sex
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