Celestial Reviews 6 - July 26. 1995 - by Celeste

      "Violet Rose" by Ann Douglas (hot ff encounter) 10
      "JHNS: Junior High Neighborhood Sluts" by James
          Wellington (Mf sex with very young girls) 9
      "Why?" by Julie (Gentle Romance) 5
      "Her End of the Business" by Sir Glans (fantasy enactment)6
      "Thumper" by Dave Read (sex between drunks) 3.5
      "Midday Intrusion" by Howie Wyrick (outdoor romance) 3
      "Small Town Girl" by HotelAlfa. (teen sex in small town) 5
      "Craftsmanship" by Sue. (blowing the glass blower) 10
      "In Control" by Jennie Bell (female dominance) 5
      "Sooo Sweet" by Vickie Tern. (Transgender) 9
      "Piss Mom" by Unknown Author (urine and incest) 2.5

"Violet Rose" by Ann Douglas.  What Ann Douglas does especially well is 
set a mood and build anticipation.  I have never made love to a woman 
in real life, and I don't intend to do so; but I *know* this is a 
realistic description of how it would be.  I can almost *remember* this 
happening to me!  The story takes a while to get started (but it builds 
anticipation while doing so), but then the sex is really hot.  An 
excellent story.  (Rating: 10)

"Junior High Neighborhood Sluts" by James Wellington (The Teacher).  
I'm going to be really honest here, and I hope you will respond to my 
review with equal honesty.  I decided to read this story because one of 
my readers asked me for my opinion about this author.  I have read only 
one chapter so far.  In fact, I downloaded just one, because I assumed 
it would be illiterate trash and that I would not want to read more 
than one chapter.  I cannot tell you how desperately I wanted this to 
be illiterate trash.  But it's not.  As I neared the end of the first 
chapter, I realized (much to my chagrin) that I was reading a well 
written narrative that made me understand the feelings of the narrator 
and of the young girl he was teaching about sex - at least, as the 
author wanted to picture them.  But I felt bad inside about the 
grudging respect I was giving this story.  I knew the stuff the 
protagonist was doing was wrong.

(I know some of you are going to accuse me of moralizing.  What *I* 
think I am doing is discussing the character development and societal 
implications of a well written story.  If I can discuss Macbeth's 
character and motives and decide that he has personality problems that 
influence my interpretation of the story, I can do the same in a good 
a.s.s. review.  And if I don't have to assassinate a king or become a 
tyrant to understand Macbeth, then I don't have to relish the thought 
of a grown man having sex with me as a child in order to comment on 
these aspects of this story.)

As I read this first chapter, it became clear to me that it would be 
*plausible* that people could develop to maturity and that a society 
could function effectively if cute little girls were initiated into 
sexual rites by friendly adults who wanted to gratify themselves 
without doing any harm to the youngsters.  My understanding is that 
there are exotic islands somewhere in the world where the initiation 
rites for young girls and boys work pretty much that way - at least 
they did until the Western missionaries got to them.  On the other 
hand, literally every single child that I have ever personally known 
who was introduced to sex by a "friendly" adult in the neighborhood has 
had problems with subsequent sexual development.

Anyhow, the story has gotten my attention.  And the author is doing a 
good enough job to convince me that maybe it would have been fun as a 
kid to learn about sex this way.  I'm not saying that I *wish* 
something like this had happened to me - just that I can see the point 
in it.  That's a mark of a good story, I think.  On the other hand, 
it's also the mark of a dangerous story.  I would hate to think that 
lots of little kids are eating this story up, deciding that maybe they 
should go find a nice man in the neighborhood who will teach them about 
sex if they suck his cock real nice.  This would be a really dumb idea.  
But, of course, The Teacher has a disclaimer telling those kids not to 
read this story.  

Of course, what the protagonist is doing is against the law.  He would 
be arrested if the police found out he was doing things like this, and 
not even the inmates in the prison would be nice to him.  That's true; 
but lots of illegal things are still interesting to think about.  
Someone could argue that that's just a good reason to leave this in 
fantasy, rather than in practice.

Then, of course, there's the title: "Junior High Neighborhood Sluts."  
What thrills are in store for us?  I'll read some more chapters and let 
you know.  So far, I can tell you that I expected illiterate, mindless 
trash and have discovered that it's not illiterate and mindless.  
(Rating: 9)

"Why?" by Julie.  I like stories that don't just follow one of the many 
sexual formulas for love and sex that show up so often in a.s.s. 
stories.  Julie departs from the stereotypical formulas, and I like 
that.  However, the remaining problem is that I think there is more to 
the story in Julie's mind than she wrote down to share with us.  I am 
left with too many unanswered questions at the end of the story.  Most 
obviously, who is this guy?  Why is she in love with him, if she has 
never met him?  Is he someone she met on the Internet?  Is he a famous 
sports star?  Is he the cousin of the best man at her best friend's 
wedding?  I think in her own mind Julie has answers to questions like 
this, but she just forgot to tell us.  The answers would make the story 
more interesting.  (Rating: 5)

"Her End of the Business" by Sir Glans.  The boss gets high having his 
lover (an employee) tell him about a previous sexual experience before 
acting it out with her.  Well written stuff.  She has job security as 
long as she can keep coming up with stories - like "1001 Arabian 
Knights." (Rating: 6)

"Thumper" by Dave Read.  A college guy is assigned to babysit for his 
sister, whom he lets throw a party.  He joins in the drinking game 
(Thumper), gets plastered, and screws one of the virgin cuties, who 
concludes that she likes his brand of Thumper better.  To make the sex 
even hotter, she's under age and he's not; and her girl friends gather 
outside the bedroom door and giggle!  A college guy doing the wild 
thing with a high school girl while they're both drunk may be 
realistic, but it's hardly creative.  This one did not hold my 
attention.  (Rating: 3.5)

"Midday Intrusion" by Howie Wyrick   The rating for this story would 
skyrocket if the writer would simply take time to do something more 
than run the spellcheck.  The story is full of obviously inappropriate 
(but correctly spelled) words.  For example, the guy "completely 
emerges his cock into Christine."  How would one do this?  Is the 
author making an interesting point, or did he mean to say "immersed"?  
In addition, the verb tenses jump all over the place, and constructions 
are just not parallel.  I had to work too hard getting the images the 
writer wanted to convey.  Secondly, while the idea of the mystery lover 
in the woods is nice, I think there should be a little more realism to 
it.  As I understand it, the woman goes out to the woods, lies 
completely naked in an exposed area, is initially perturbed when a 
passerby rapes her, is pleasantly surprised to find that the rapist is 
gentle and sweet, enjoys sexual rhapsody with the mystery man, removes 
the gag and blindfold, and then nods off to blissful sleep.  The story 
line isn't really as silly as I made it sound in the last sentence; but 
it would be nice to have some development of the rationale for some of 
this.  Sue's "Slippery When Wet" offers an interesting contrast: in 
that story a guy and girl decide to make love in a jacuzzi after the 
fitness center is closed, are surprised by some other people, and have 
wild and spontaneous sex with them.  On the surface, both stories are 
equally improbable; but Sue builds up a rationale that makes the reader 
think this could really happen to her (or him).  (Ann Douglas's "Violet 
Rose," reviewed earlier in this article, is another example of a highly 
improbable fantasy that the author makes not only believable but 
actually vivid.  Sue's "Craftsmanship," reviewed later, is another good 
example.)  The author of the present story should not abandon his 
writing career; he should just be a little more patient and iron out 
some problems before rushing to press.  (Rating: 3)

"Small Town Girl" by HotelAlfa.  A high school girls has erotic 
fantasies about getting laid by a sexy teacher.  Then, right there in 
the town's drug store, she makes brief but passionate love to the local 
pharmacist, who happens to be the husband of the much hated French 
teacher, who is not woman enough to satisfy him.  The thoughts and 
fantasies are realistic, but the sex with the pharmacist is full of 
cliches:  "I can feel it, I can feel it, it's amazing," Wendy gasped. 
"Oh, me too, I'm coming, yes, yes, oh, Mark, fuck me, oh, God, oh, God, 
oh yes, fuck meee..." Wave after wave of hot throbbing pleasure came 
over her, tears in her eyes from the intensity of the experience. 
Here's a rarity: Hot and hard, Mark pumped her, stretched her twat with 
every stroke, she moaning, he grunting. You don't see a nominative 
absolute used correctly on a.s.s just everyday! (Rating: 5)

"Craftsmanship" by Sue.  I always save Sue's stories for a time when 
I'll have time to relish and enjoy her imagery.  The writers of many of 
the previous stories could benefit from reading and imitating Sue's 
style.  (They could also use the occasion for some private foreplay.)  
In this story Sue makes passionate love to the glass blower, after she 
(literally) blows a phallus that he later uses to ravage her cunt.  
Actually, Sue says it better than I did.  If you analyze them really 
carefully, Sue's fantasies probably would make no more sense in real 
life than those in the previous stories.  After all, what sensible girl 
would want to watch a muscular young man engaged in his trade, then 
seduce him by having him help her blow and shape a glass phallus, then 
have him insert that still warm phallus into her well-primed most 
private parts, then be driven completely out of her mind by a blazing 
hot orgasm when he inserts the real thing, then suck his gorgeous cock 
that seems to fit so well into the environs of this shop surrounded by 
erotic art that her lover has himself produced until he explodes into a 
gigantic orgasm that she cannot contain?  Or what red-blooded guy would 
take delight in being used in this way by a lewd and lascivious woman, 
interested in driving her partner into a state of raging ecstasy only 
because she thinks that he will respond in a way that will contribute 
to her own self-gratification?  For that matter, who would even want to 
read about such things?  Probably only people like those befuddled 
readers who are tempted right now to cast this review into temporary 
electronic oblivion and go find this hot, sexy story.  But somehow, Sue 
manages to use words and give rationales that make it all seem worth 
fantasizing about.  (Rating: 10)

"In Control" by Jennie Bell.  A woman goes for a drive with a friend 
who wants her to dominate him sexually.  She lets him eat her out, even 
though another guy's cum is oozing from her cunt.  He enjoys it and 
wants to do it again some time.  This is not a bad story; but it lacks 
atmosphere or anticipation or something.  I personally think what 
happens in this story is pretty gross, but I'm sure lots of people 
would find the activity interesting.  Even so, the story would benefit 
from answering some unanswered questions.  I mean, assuming that it's 
fun to go for a ride with an emotionally stressed friend who has major 
psychological problems and humiliate him while he has sex with you, 
wouldn't it at least be nice to know something about their 
relationship?  What the author should do is read Sue's "Craftsmanship," 
which is reviewed right before this story, and try to imitate some of 
the strategies Sue uses to present a full story rather than an 
interesting snippet of a story.  (Rating: 5)

"Sooo Sweet" by Vickie Tern.  This is a story of an extremely unusual 
little lady married to an equally unusual little man who is telling a 
really unusual story as if it were the most natural thing in the world.  
The story is narrated by a beautician to her customers, and her 
babbling monologue helps maintain a fascinating mood for the story."  
The surprises and sudden turns in the plot are what make this a good 
story.

My own reaction was predominantly one of humor.  "OK... I guess that 
could work...." I really can't tell you much about the actual story, 
because advance knowledge of the plot would ruin it for you.  This is a 
TG (Transgender) story; and so people not at all interested in that 
genre may not want to read this rather lengthy story.  However, I 
myself normally do not tune in to TG stories.  I read this one only 
because the author sent me an advance copy; but I found this story to 
be quite interesting.  The TG lifestyle is definitely not for me or my 
husband; but this story was still fun for me to read. 

Here's a technical note.  This story (like many other good stories) 
depends on logical sequencing of ideas and appropriate formatting of 
text.  If your service is like mine, in many cases when you download a 
document from a.s.s., you get a manuscript on your screen with a ragged 
appearance.  The tab stops are gone, there are paragraph markers at the 
end of each line, and lines sometimes seem to end in the middle of the 
page for no good reason.  Although it is still possible to read the 
text under these circumstances, it is often distracting to do so and 
difficult to pick up the logic of the text.  The easiest way to solve 
this problem is to transfer the story to your word processor and change 
the document margins.  If necessary, you can also change the font style 
and/or size.  By doing this, you can get the document to look pretty 
much like the author thought it would look; and this often makes it 
easier to understand and enjoy the story.  (Rating: 9)

Repost Reviews  (Whenever I spot a repost of a story that I've already 
reviewed, I'll try to repost the review. )

"Piss Mom" by Unknown Author. Peggy is a divorced mother who has to 
take a leak in the garden.  Since she suddenly realizes that her young 
son is hanging out the window watching her and since the sensation of 
urinating in the great outdoors is already turning her on, she has a 
resounding orgasm while little Johnny watches in admiration.  When 
Peggy goes into the house to confront her son about the incident, she 
finds him masturbating; and so, naturally, she gives him a hand job.  
Morally confused, she takes a hot bath; but when she gets out of the 
tub she finds Johnny sucking on her panties, which are full of the 
scent of her recent orgasm.  She joins him in this occupation; but when 
he asks to see her naked cunt (which he has already seen in the garden 
a few minutes earlier), Peggy's conscience won't permit this; and so 
she encourages him to cuddle up to her naked ass instead.  And so it 
goes....

With a title like this, you'd think the story couldn't miss; but it 
falls short of greatness  It was a multipart story, and somehow I got 
only the first part.  But don't bother sending me the rest, unless the 
plot takes a dramatic shift.  The main reason I'm mentioning it in this 
review at all is because this story shows clear signs of being 
*digitally scanned* from a published manuscript.  (I've learned to 
recognize this, because some of my students have tried to plagiarize in 
this way.)  I think the reason the person who posted this "doesn't know 
who wrote it" is because the cover was torn off - the way the 
bookstores do when they get refunds on cheap paperbacks they can't 
sell.  What kind of person is this?  Senators Exon and Dole had me 
expecting good clean perverts; but whoever posted this doesn't even 
respect the copyright law! (Rating 2.5)

