
                                                            My Second Life
                                
                                
                                
It had been four years.  Laura had been gone that long and it still seemed like yesterday to me.  I
am Bill.  I was married to Laura for twelve years.  Twelve wonderful and happy years.  Then in
one terrible blow it had ended.  Laura had been taken from me by a stupid accident. 
                                
She had gone to the convenience store for a few things to finish off dinner.  She would just be
gone a few minutes.  The next thing I knew a policeman was knocking at our door with our local
minister.  There had been an accident.  Laura was gone.  I can't remember much after that.  She
had pulled out in front of a semi-truck.  He couldn't stop in time.  Killed instantly they said.  
                                
Numbness gripped me for over a year.  Friends tried to get me out and about.  I just sat at home
and brooded.  Insurance money sat unspent in an account.  I went to work still...each day quietly
hoping that I was having a bad nightmare.  One day I woke up and realized that Laura was gone. 
She was not coming back.  
                                
It was a Friday, I called into work and took a sick day.  I sat around and cried, suffering a rude
awakening.  I had been angry and lost for so long it seemed.  I determined that from that day on I
would live.  Live as best I could because life was too short.  
                                
Still the emptiness in me haunted and tormented as I went forth living.  Two years later, I had
dated a few women.  Nothing.  I felt nothing and acted like I felt.  Cold and alone.  I could see it
was me, not them.  I wasn't going to find anyone else to replace my Laura.  I guess deep inside I
couldn't let go of her at all.
                                
One day, I just gave up trying to find someone else.  It wasn't working out and I hated making
others feel miserable on our ‘dates'.  I spent more and more time just walking around the city.  I
would visit the museums, the parks, libraries, anything to occupy my time.
                                
I noticed that I had been pushing my walks to go on the fringes of ‘safe' and gone to the parts of
town that most people would not travel on foot by themselves.  Nobody bothered me.  Nobody
came near me or threatened me.  I was left alone.
                                
On one walk I noticed a young girl in cut-off jeans and a very skimpy top hanging around the
stairs to a rundown tenement building.  She just looked like she didn't belong there.  White
skinned, blonde hair, nice body with a very nice chest.  A large black man came out and started to
talk to her.  She looked afraid of him, yet she stood close to him.  Handing him some cash he gave 
her a small packet and turned and left.
                                
She glanced at me with the look of a ghost afraid of it's own shadow.  Putting the packet in her
pocket she started to walk near me as I went on my way.  Just behind me and to one side I could
catch sight of her from time to time.  We got to the park and she kept close to me.  There were
some bad apples hanging around there, so I knew why she was closer to me.  I was her protection
of sorts.
                                
We walked around the park and on the other side she caught up to me. 
                                
"Hey mister.  Would you like some company?  Uh...Your not a cop or anything are you?"
I was a bit taken aback for a second.  At first I wasn't sure she was talking to me.  Then as
   realization dawned on her ‘offer' I was a bit speechless.
                                                
"I'm not sure I know what you want."
                                
"Well mister, I think I know what you would like.  I am worth it too.  I can show you a real good
  time...if you know what I mean."
                                
"Young lady, you should be in school not out here...propositioning strangers."
                                
"Hey, you aren't my dad.  I just offered to help make you feel good for a bit not be lectured about
  how I live."
                                
She turned away and left me standing there.  I had just been propositioned by a girl young enough
to have been my daughter, if I had one.  Did I look so alone that she could see something in me
that I couldn't see myself?  Or had I just looked like some easy money for her to score?
                                
That encounter stuck in my mind all that weekend.  I was a bit stunned that someone as young as
her would be turning tricks for a pimp.  I found myself wondering about her and her past.  What
had made her go this way?  What had caused her to begin selling her body for cash?  Drugs?  
                                
The following week I became engrossed with work and getting some contracts signed.  After each
work day I would go home and work on the details, then go to bed.  I didn't walk around at all
being so busy trying to get everything done.  That weekend the contracts were signed.  I took the
clients out for dinner.  We went to a nice restaurant and as we ate I saw her.  She walked by on
the street, dressed in a very tight, short skirt, low-cut skin tight top with no bra.  She looked like a
cheap hooker on the prowl.
                                
She was only in my sight for a short time.  After dinner and a few drinks I saw my clients to their
hotel and then I headed home.  On my drive I went out of my way a bit and drove down the street
where I had first seen her with her pimp.  There she was, standing on the street corner, looking
like a little girl trying to look like an adult.
                                
I pulled over, a reflexive action on my part.  I didn't know what to say, what I was doing.  I was
lost as she looked.  She came over to the passenger window.  I rolled it down as she leaned in.
                                
"What'cha looking for mister...Oh, it's you.  What do you want man?"

"Um...I don't know.  Talk?  Can you talk to me?"

"Hafta charge ya, ya know mister?  I charge by the hour...or half hour.  Fifty will getcha half an
  hour."

 "Never mind.  Sorry to have bothered you."

"What the fuck's you're problem man?  Fuck off fucker!"

She stood up and angrily walked away from the car.  I was stunned at her speech and her
reaction.  Then I remembered that she was a hooker, and to her time was money.
                                
I rolled up my window and drove away.  I was troubled with my actions.  Why had I felt a need to
pull over to talk to her?  What was I trying to do?  I went home and sat around wondering if I had
become so desperate that I was about to resort to hookers for my sexual pleasure.  Searching
deep inside myself I realized that was not why.  
                                
I slept the troubled sleep of old the next few nights.  I couldn't get her out of my mind.  One day
at work as I opened my desk drawer  it hit me.  She looked an awful lot like Laura had at that
age.  Same hair, same breasts, same body.  How had I been so blind to have not realized this right
 away?
                                
I didn't see her around after that for quite some time.  Then, one night as I took a walk I came
across a huddled mass in the park sitting on a bench.  Cuts and bruises all over her face and
shoulders.  Crying into dirty clothing and looking like hell. 
                                
I sat next to her, not touching, but close.  She looked at me with a mixture of fear and suspicion.
I didn't say a word.  Sitting there I began to feel like a fool.  What was I doing?  I didn't know. 
She continued crying and then sobbing a bit she began to get up.  I held out my hand, offering her
my hanky.
                                
"WHAT?"

"You look hurt.  Can I take you to the hospital?"

"FUCK YOU!  I can take care of myself.  Go away.  Leave me alone."

"I was just trying to help."

"Yeah, sure, just like Alphonse.  I'll help you little girl, then next thing you know here I am a
  whore on drugs getting beat up for fun by my johns."

"That's not what I meant.  I want to help you.  What can I do for you?"

"Just leave me alone.  You are all alike.  Men use women like me and give us nothing but pain. 
  Go away and leave me alone!"

"Look, you're hurt and obviously without a roof over your head.  I have some money...not a lot
with me, but take it.  At least get a motel room and something to eat."
                                
Grabbing the money out of my hand she looked at me, then turned and ran into the night.  I sat
there for a bit thinking.  I questioned my motives and then my actions.  I was lost in thought when
a shadow fell over me.  Looking up I saw a large man standing in front of me.

"Hey man...you seen a sweet young thing around here?  Blonde, short skirt, nice tits?"  

"No I haven't.  Is she someone important to you?"

"Ha hah hah...no man, not important.  She's just one'o my whores ya know?  Alphonse has the
  best white whores in town."

 "So, you're her pimp then?"

"Yeah, that's what I am.  Lil bitch ran out on me earlier tonight.  I needs to teach her some
   manners.  Can't be leaving the johns ya know what I mean?"

 "Perhaps she doesn't want to work for you anymore...Alphonse."

"Oh, you don't get it do ya?  She has to work for me or she ain't working at all. That's the rule ya
  know?  My turf, my girls, my whores.  Them's the rules."
                                
He left me sitting there.  I was sure that if he found her she would get hurt even more.  I had to
find her before Alphonse did.  I got up and headed off in the direction I had seen her running to.  I
walked for an hour, never seeing her at all.  Giving up I turned and started to head home.  I
decided to take a short cut and go down a street I had never been on.  As I walked along in the
darkness I heard something in the shadows near a dumpster.  Listening I realized it was someone
                        crying.  A girl.
                                
I went over and in the dim light I saw it was her.  Crouched on her knees in the corner of the
building.  I reached down and took her by an arm. 
 
"You are coming with me.  To my place.  You need a bath and some sleep in a nice warm bed."
                                
"Why are you doing this?  Don't you know what I am?  What do you want from me?  What, are
  you some kind of kinky bastard?"
                                
"Look, even I don't know why I am offering to help you.  Lord knows you haven't been very
friendly to me.  I just can't leave you on the street for Alphonse to find later.  Come on.  In the
morning you can think about what you want.  Right now you need a bath and some rest.  Also
 something on those bruises."
                                
I pulled her along with me.  She followed reluctantly, but docile enough.  As we neared my block
  she began to pull back.
                                
"I can't.  I can't go with you.  You live in a nice hood.  I can't be here.  Your neighbors, they will
 not like me."
                                
"Hey, I could care less what my neighbors think.  Come on...you've made it this far.  I may have
some clothes that will fit you.  My late wife's, but I think you two were the same size."
                                
I got her to my house with a bit more arguing, and in the bathtub.  I left here alone and went to
the closet.  My wife's things were still hanging there.  I hadn't been able to remove them as of yet. 
I liked the smell of her in those clothes.  I found a pair of jeans, and a blouse.  Looking around in
 a drawer or two I found a bra and panties too. 
                                
I dropped the clothes off at the bathroom door and then went to the kitchen to make up a late
dinner for two.  Just as I finished, she came in and sat at the table.  Clean and fresh, even with the
cuts and bruises  here and there, she still looked quite beautiful.  Her hair in a large ponytail
hanging down her back.  I noticed that she had not worn the bra. 
                                
"So, was your bath soothing for you?"
                                
"Yeah.  Why did you bring me to your home?  You're not going to be a kinky bastard now are
  you?"
                                
"No, I'm not a ‘kinky bastard' as you say.  I just wanted to try to help you in some way.  You
seem...that is to say...look, I just wanted to help you because you looked like someone I... who
needed it.  That's all.  Besides, if I were a kinky bastard like you are thinking, do you think I'd tell
you that?"
                                
"Yeah?  Well, most people don't help like you do.  The other day...you stopped by in your
 car...what was up with that?"
                                
"I honestly don't know.  I guess I wanted to talk to you.  Maybe I am curious why you are
doing...why you...look, I'll show you to your room.  If you need anything during the night just feel
free to get what you want."
                                
I showed her to the spare bedroom.  While she was looking around, I got some more of my wife's
clothes out and took them to her.  
                                
"Your wife was just my size.  Where is she?  Did she leave you for someone else or something?"
                                
"No.  She um...passed away a few years ago."
                                
"You still have her things in your room?  Man, that's fucked up.  You should have gotten rid of
that stuff as quickly as you could.  Not good to have things like that hanging around to remind
you."
                                
"Well, thank you for your advice Dr..  I'll be sure to take that to heart tomorrow.  Good night.  I'll
 make breakfast in the morning if you want."
                                
Her flippant diagnosis of my problem irritated me and I spoke sharply to her.
                                
"Hey, look, I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to be so...well...mean.  Um...thanks too.  For everything."
                                
"Yeah.  Good night."
                                
"Night...what's your name anyway?  I mean, you have been helping me so well here, We should at
 least know each other's name.  Mine's Shannon."
                                
"Well Shannon, I'm Russell.  Sleep well."
                                
I went to bed that night with a mixed heart.  Part of me was angry at her snippy little commentary
on my having not gotten rid of my wife's things.  Like I could just throw her things out just like
that and not have it bother me.  Her things were my only connection with her now and I still
                  missed her so much still.   
                                
The other thing that was bothering me was why I had reached out to help a young woman who
was probably a druggie and definitely a hooker.  Could I sleep safely tonight at all?
                                
I slept roughly and several times I got up and walked by the spare room checking on her.  From
what I could tell, she slept very well all night.  Just at daybreak I slept a bit then got upd started
breakfast.
                                
Shannon came into the kitchen just as I was about halfway finished making our morning meal.  I
had made bacon, eggs, pancakes, and cut up some fresh fruit.  She looked around as I set the
table and finally started talking to me. 
                                
"Good morning Russell.  Or would you prefer Russ?"
                                
"You may call me either.  Laura, my late wife, used to call me Russ.  It works."
                                
"Do you miss her?  Your late wife I mean.  She's been gone for how long?"
                                
 "Three years now.  So, are you hungry?  Breakfast is served."
                                
I cut the conversation since it was uncomfortable for me.  She was way too much interested in my
past and I was not interested in explaining anything to her about my keeping Laura's things like I
had.
                                
As she ate she looked around at the kitchen.  I could see an interest in her eyes.  I could tell that
she liked the way everything looked.  
                                
"You keep a pretty clean house for a guy."
                                
"Thanks.  Not a much of anything else for me to do when I'm not working."
                                
"So...you seeing anyone?  You know, dating?"
                                
"I dated a bit...gave it up."
                                
"You must have loved her a lot."
                              
"Yeah.  You want some more pancakes or bacon?"
                                
"No.  Why do you change the subject every time I mention your wife?"
                                
"I don't."
                                
"Yes you do.  Too painful yet?  You must have been a close couple.  Not like my mom and dad. 
  I'll bet it would have been great to be your daughter."
                                
"We didn't have any children.  Laura had a physical problem that made it so she couldn't get
  pregnant."
                                
"Oh.  That's too bad.  I can't have kids either.  A john beat me pretty bad one night put me in the
hospital.  I was bleeding pretty bad down there, found out that he had messed me up enough that
I will never have kids."
                                
"Why?  Why do you do what you do when it causes you so much pain?"
                                
"Hey, gotta live ya know? Alphonse used to take pretty good care of me but he has some new
girls now so I am down on his list.  I don't bring in as much as I used to. Getting too old or maybe
to used up."
                                
I was stunned at how matter of fact she was talking about her life of prostitution. She acted like it
was no big deal, that people in her line of work got used up fast.  She couldn't have been much
past seventeen if that old.
                                
"Do you want out?  Would you like to go back to school and get a degree or learn a skill other
  than...um..."
                                
"Hooking?  Fucking for money?  I have a good skill.  I can fuck and suck with the best of them.
  It's what I do."
                                
"You don't want to find something else a little...shall I say...safer?"
                                
"Once I wanted to be an engineer. My dad laughed at me.  Said women were only good for one
  thing only and that was having babies."
                                
"I'm sorry to hear that.  I think you would have made a great engineer."
                                
"How would you know that?  You've only seen me as what I am...a hooker.  How could you
think that I would have made a great engineer anyway?"
                                
"I don't know.  My wife, Laura...she was an engineer.  Mechanical engineer.  A damn good one
 too.  You remind me of her."
                                
"Yeah...I saw her picture in the living room.  Is that why you want to help me?  I look like your
wife?  You want me to pretend to be her?  Take you to bed and hug you close...kissing...touching
you...just like she did?"
                                
"NO.  You can't...she was...I'm not looking for a replacement for my wife.  You may look like her
in some strange way, but I do not want to be intimate with you like that."
                                
This young girl was upsetting me greatly.  I did not fully understand why I had reached out to
help her at first, and even now I was wondering why.  Shannon had a way of directly asking
questions that seemed to drive to the heart of me.
                                
"Oh...afraid you'll catch some disease?  I am STD free...well as far as I know anyway.  Look, I
  need to repay you for the clothes and taking care of me."
                                
She stood up and began to strip her clothes off.  I turned away and left the kitchen wanting to be
away as far as I could get from her.  Deep inside I wanted to...have her.  She reminded me so
much of Laura that I couldn't help myself.  I knew that she wasn't Laura though, and that she was
far too young too.
                                
I went into my bedroom and waited for a bit.  I heard her go into the living room and turn on the
TV.  Thinking that she had given up trying to ‘pay me back' I walked out only to see that she was
stark naked laying on the couch spread legged.  Her hands were in her crotch, playing with
herself.
                                
Her pussy was shaved, and I could see that she was very wet there as well.  She looked up into
my eyes and then lifted her hands up and out towards me.  Her breasts were heaving, nipples hard
as she sat there showing me everything she had to offer.
                               
"Come over here and help a girl out will ya?"
                                
"No...you have the wrong idea.  I just wanted to help you.  You were hurt.  You just needed
someone to help you out.  I don't want to...to...have you that way."
                                
"Oh really?  Then why are your pants tented out so far?  Pickle in your pocket?  I can see that you
need a woman.  Come on...I won't bite.  Hell...I won't even charge you."
                                
She jumped up and began to stalk towards me.  I backed up.  I felt the bedroom door at my back
and I knew that was the last place I should be headed to.  I turned and walked quickly into the
kitchen, going right to the sink.  I busied myself with the dishes, putting them in the dishwasher.
                                
I was shaking.  I had wanted her.  I had wanted to take her in my arms, hold her close to me.  Lay
her down on the bed and...I shook my head.  My mind was mixed up now.  Why had I decided to
offer to help her anyway?
                                
She stood in the door to the kitchen, naked.  Her face smiling at my discomfort.  She was holding
her breasts up and out, licking her lips.  She had no shame at all.  
                                
"Look.  You misunderstand why I helped you.  I just wanted to..."
                                
"You wanted to be close to someone that reminded you of your wife...Laura.  You wanted to
have your wife with you again.  I can be her for you if you want.  I won't mind.  I'd even like it.  I
think you would take care of me and not hurt me.  So why don't you come on over here and have
me?  I'm willing."
                                
"No.  I can't.  That's not why I helped you.  Yes you reminded me of my late wife.  I just
  can't...you are not...please...don't."
                                
She gave up then.  She sighed and turned to walk into the guest bedroom.  Later she showed up
dressed in Laura's jeans and an old white shirt.  She looked quite beautiful and even a bit happy
under that facade of toughness.
                                
"Thanks for the clothes.  They fit me pretty good.  Your wife must have been exactly my size. 
  So...you miss her quite a bit yet huh?"
                                
 "Yes.  I miss her quite a bit."
                                
"Why don't you move on?  Find someone else?  There's a lot of fish in that sea you know."
                                
"Tried...just didn't feel right. How about you?  Why are you ‘living' as you put it, like you are? 
 Why not go home to your parents and..."
                                
"Look, my mom is a drunk.  My dad used to beat me and when mom was too out of it to provide
him with some...'fun' he would come and use me.  From the time I was eleven.  I ran away and
never looked back."
                                
"Oh.  I'm sorry.  I didn't know..."
                                
"Yeah...well don't worry about it.  I can take care of myself pretty good.  I've done alright this
 long anyway."
                                
 "So...how old are you?  Really I mean."
                                
 "Nineteen.  Almost twenty.  Two months."
                                
 "You look a bit younger."
                                
"Yeah, that's why I was so popular with Alphonse's customers.  I look younger than I actually am. 
 Most of his ‘clients' like very young girls.  With my pussy shaved clean and my hair in pigtails I
look about twelve or so."
                                
"That's sick."
                                
"That's life pal.  Most men are dogs.  They want sweet young virgins to have their rocks off in and
to use in anyway they feel.  Then they want to dump them in the gutter afterwards."
                                
 "Some men maybe, certainly not all men.  Nor most men either."
                                
"Yeah, well I see men acting and doing things you probably don't even want to know about.  My
experience has shown me that any man will do or try to do a young girl.  It's only natural.  We are
softer, better shape to our bodies yet, haven't had a lot of kids or gotten stretch marks...more
desirable.  Youth and beauty you know?"
                                
"That may be for some men.  How about when you get older?  What happens then?"
                                
"Mister, girls in my line of work don't get too much older."
                                
"So, why not change your line of work?"
                                
"How?"
                                
"Go to school, get a degree in something that interests you."
                                
"Takes money.  Lots of money.  I can't do that and live too.  Gotta earn a living somehow.  Gotta
 eat you know?"
                                
My heart was pounding.  My thoughts were running faster than I should have let them.  What I
was about to do...my wife would have kicked my ass for even thinking of offering.  Yet...deep
inside I felt...maybe not.  I plunged ahead with my thoughts in any case.
                                
"Look, I have some money.  You could stay here and go to school.  I'll put you through
college...any college you want.  You can get a degree, become what you want to be.  I'll pay your
way full."
                                
"Are you nuts?  You want to pay my way through school?  You don't even know me.  Why
would you want to help me like that...knowing what I am?"
                                
"What you are is a young lady that has had a tough time so far.  I am offering a way out for you. 
I have it.  Let me help you.  No obligations, no hooks, no strings, no rules.  I put you through
school, you get a degree in something that you want to do."
                                
She looked at me like I was crazy.  I probably was.  I know my co-workers would have been
shocked and even questioning my sanity for this.  All I knew was I felt I had to help this girl out.
                                
"I can't.  I can't take your money like that."
                                
"Yes you can.  It's not my money anyway.  It's my wife's insurance money.  From when she died. 
It's just been sitting there, unused.  I don't need it and quite frankly, don't want it either.  If it can
help someone out...such as you, then it will have gone to good use.  Let me help you."
                                
"Alphonse.  He'd kill me.  He will be hunting me down as it is anyway.  He'd never let me go to
 school."
                                
"Look, you don't have to go to school here.  You can go anywhere you want to go.  I'll set you
up in an apartment or on campus.  On me.  I will pay for everything.  You just have to learn and
get good grades.  Get that degree and be free of Alphonse forever."
                                
"I don't know.  It isn't right.  It's your wife's money that was intended for you, not me."
                                
"It's my money.  It is right.  What could possibly be wrong with using that money to do some
good for someone?  I'll tell you what, nothing.  If you don't use it, that money  will just sit there,
never being used."
                                
"You're one crazy motherfucker you know that?  I was just bullshitting you anyway, I don't want
 to go to college, I just want to...I like..."
                                
"So, you just tell me what you think I want to hear then?  Is that it?  I'm just a John you are trying
to please?  Look, I think that you can be a whole lot better for yourself.  I'm offering you a way
out.  Take it.  People don't get breaks like this very often in life."
                                
"Yeah?  And end up being in a classroom and seeing an old John in the same class, or maybe even
the professor having been a John of mine?  Then what?  I can't go to school.  It's too late for me."
                                
"Shannon, it's never too late.  What would you love to do if your past or problems at the present
didn't matter?  You must have some kind of dream you look forward to."
                                
"Why do you care so much?  I'm just trash, poor white trash.  A whore.  For the right price you
 can have me anyway you want.  A prostitute.  Nothing."
                                
"You are a person.  A human being.  A beautiful and intelligent human being."
                                
"I'm a whore.  Paid for sex.  That and I have a little...problem with...drugs.  I kind of like my
crack you know.  Right now I would fuck a football team for enough to get a baggie from
Alphonse.  Starting to bug me a bit.  I need a fix, know what I mean?"
                                
"You need to quit the drugs."
                                
"Oh yeah...tell me something I don't know.  Look, I'm hooked on this shit.  I have no real choice
  in the matter anymore.  I gotta have that fix and soon."
                                
 "How about I take you to the hospital and get you some help?"
                                
"Yeah...right."
                                
"No, really.  I really do just want to help you.  Shannon, you deserve a better life.  A nice home, a
good person to share with.  Let me help you to find that life.  I want to help you.  Please?"
                                
"Well, it's your money and life.  I can tell you that it won't be a whole lotta fun.  I've seen people
come down from crack before.  It isn't pretty.  I do want off this shit though."
                                
"Then you'll do it?  Let me take you to the hospital?"
                                
"Yeah...ok.  Lets go before I change my mind though."
                                
I took Shannon to the hospital.  There, an ER doctor looked her over and first treated her cuts
and bruises.  As he did he kept giving me dirty looks.  At that point I didn't think much about it,
until the cops showed up that is.
                                
 "Excuse me sir.  Did you bring in that young lady over there?"
                                
He was polite, but firm.  His dark blue uniform and hat seemed to make him larger than life.  His
height was somewhat more than my own six feet, so I was a bit intimidated.  I was confused for a
minute, until I realized that he had been called by the doctor most likely. 
                                
"Um...is there a problem officer?"
                                
"She has been roughed up a bit hasn't she?"
                                
"Yeah, her pimp."
                                
"So...you're her pimp then?"
                                
"NO.  I'm just helping her out."

"Let me get this straight.  You're helping out a hooker?  Haven't you ‘helped' her out enough
already?"
                                
Suddenly I knew that they all thought I had beat her.  I could see trouble in the near future.  I
hoped that if Shannon told the truth, they would believe her.  I had doubts about that now too.
                                
"Look, I found her on the street and..."
                                
"That's usually where one finds hookers pal."
                                
"I was walking, she was laying in by a dumpster crying.  I took her home and cleaned her up, gave
her a place to sleep, then brought her here for treatment of her..."
                                
 "So, she wasn't quite as tough as you figured then huh?"
                                
"What?  No.  I mean it's not like that at all.  Look, I was trying to help her.  Her john beat her up,
she is strung out on crack.  I'm just trying to help her out.  A person can still care can't they?  Or
is that illegal now too?"
                                
I was beginning to get angry.  Who did this clown think I was anyway?  I had done nothing wrong
and he was more or less accusing me of beating a hooker up in some kind of sick way for
pleasure.
 
The thought of hitting Shannon repulsed me.  She was just a girl.  A young, beautiful creature that
needed help. The cop was looking at my ID as he listened to me, then he called in.  A bit later his
partner came up and whispered in his ear.
                                
"Hey, look.  I'm sorry.  We were lead to believe that you brought in this girl because you beat her. 
The doctor called us.  Well...his nurse did.  It's what they do nowadays you know?  You check
out.  Um...by the way, sorry about your wife.  I was there that night."
                                
"Yeah.  Thanks.  Are you done then?"
                                
I was fuming and then his mention of my wife caused a roll of pain to shoot through me.  Dammit
I still hurt.  And he had been there that night.
                                
"Wait...one thing officer...Watson?"
                                
"Yeah?"
                                
"That night...when you..."
                                
"Look...we were first on the scene.  She was already gone.  She probably never knew what hit
 her."
                                
"Thank you for that.  I have wondered...morbid I know, but it has bothered me."
                                
"You'd be surprised, or maybe not.  Quite a few people wonder about things like that."
                                
They left and the doctor came up.  His first words to me were the start of an apology to me.
                                
"Um...I'm sorry, I have to report any suspicious things like her marks. So much abuse these days."
                                
 "I understand.  You could have asked her first maybe."
                                
"Well, in situations like this we usually let the cops ask.  Works out better in the long run.  She
has a drug addiction too you know.  Are you her father then?"
                                
"No.  I'll take care of the bills though.  Here's my credit card..."
                                
"Oh, you'll have to take that to the billings office.  They will be more than glad to take your
   money.  I need someone to sign for her treatment though."
                                
"Isn't she of age?  She told me she was almost twenty."
                                
"Hmm.  I'll have to check out her story then.  Can I ask you one thing though?"
                                
"Why am I helping her when I know what she has done, what she has been?"
                                
     "Uh...yeah.  You have to admit it is kind of strange."
                                
I could see he thought I was some kind of pervert yet.  I just shrugged and looked into the room
where Shannon sat.
                                
"She reminds me of someone I cared very much for once.  I'm trying to pay back a debt to that
 person."
                                
"Oh I see."
                                
 I could see that he in fact didn't see, but I didn't care.
                                
Shannon ended up staying in the hospital for the night.  In the morning when I got there I half
expected to see that she had left to go back to Alphonse.  I was mildly surprised to find her
waiting
                      for me in her room.
                                
                        "Good morning."
                                
"Hey.  Bet you thought I ran out on you last night didn't you?  Didn't expect to find me here yet
                           did you?"
                                
"Honest?  Yes.  I had a thought that you just might have gone back to Alphonse."
                                
"Nope.  You're stuck with me now.  You're gonna regret it too.  I have to talk to a shrink this
                afternoon.  For the drug rehab."
                          "Ok.  Here?"
                                
                            "Yeah."
                                
         "Where would you like to go in the mean time?"
                                
"Oh, they want me to stick around.  Guess the doctor thinks I'll run out or something."
                                
"Okay then.  What would you like to do in the mean while?  Magazines?  TV?  Anything I can get
                             you?"
                                
"I still don't know why you are being so damned nice to me.  Why are you so set on helping me
                     out like this anyway?"
                                
               "Because I want to.  That's all."
                                
"You're about the weirdest man I have ever been around.  You're...nice.  That's it...you are too
nice.  Most men would either buy me or just ignore me.  You...you're trying to help me.  That's a
                     first for this girl."
                                
"Like I told you before, not all men are mean.  Matter of fact, most would probably lend you a
                    hand if you needed it."
                                
"Yeah, right, and get a piece of me in return afterwards too.  I'd even bet money that they'd get
                 their piece of me beforehand."
                                
"Well, I'm not.  I genuinely want to help you out.  You have a hard time ahead what with your
addiction and all.  I will be here to help you each step of the way."
                                
               "What are you getting out of it?"
                                
"Lets just say...satisfaction.  I'm going to get satisfaction of knowing that I was able to help a
         beautiful young lady become something better."
                                
        "Lots of other deserving ladies out there Russ."
                                
                   "Well, I found you first."
                                
Shannon spent the next four months at the hospital.  I went to see her each day and hold her when
she had shakes, bring her magazines and soda's.  I was becoming quite close to her by the time she
   had finished her treatment and was ready to be cut loose.
                                
During this time I began to have feelings of love for this young lady.  I would go to see her, visit
as
long as I could, and then go home and think about her all night.  Once in a while I would be
visiting her and something she would do or say would cause my cock to get hard.  I successfully
                 hid that from her each time. 
                                
                                
The day I brought her to my home from the hospital she looked like a normal and beautiful young
teenager that was coming home with her father.  You could not have been able to tell that just a
few short months ago she had been a streetwalking hooker with a drug addiction.
                                
The first night home, I set her up in the spare bedroom and even got her some personal things at
the store on the way.  She was quiet and laid down for a bit as I made dinner.  When I went to get
       her to eat I listened before knocking at her door.
                                
I could hear what sounded like crying.  Knocking softly I waited. 
                                
                            "Y-yes?"
                                
"Uh...dinners ready if you are hungry.  It isn't much special, but I think that it's going to taste
                good.  Ummm...are you alright?"
                                
"Yes...yes.  I'll be right out Russ.  I just need to go to the bathroom first."
                                
When she came into the kitchen I could see from her red-rimmed eyes that she had been crying. 
We didn't speak much as we ate and then Shannon helped me clean up the dishes afterwards.  I
kept debating whether or not I should mention her red eyes but she took that away from me right
                  as we finished the cleaning.
                                
"I really want you to know that you have helped me far more than any man has ever helped me
before Russ.  You are the first person to do things for me and not ask for anything in return.  I...I
don't know how to repay you, but I will somehow someway.  Thank you."
                                
As she spoke to me tears fell down her cheeks.  Not being able to help myself I put my arms
around her and hugged her close to me.  I could feel her tense up as I did, and realizing why, I
                     released her quickly.
                                
"Sorry.  I was just...I thought that you...I am proud of you Shannon.  You have come a long ways
                   from when  we first met."
                                
Shannon looked into my eyes without speaking.  Then she suddenly reached out and put her arms
around me, hugging me.  I was careful to not do the same as I did not want her to tense up again. 
                    I felt bad about that.  
                                
"I'm sorry Russ.  I should have known that you of all people wouldn't have wanted something
from me a minute ago when you hugged me.  Bad memories I guess."
                                
Reassured, I carefully put my arms around her and hugged her lightly.  Shannon buried her head
into my chest and held me close.  I could smell the fruity essence of shampoo fragrance in her hair
as I held her.  My heart began to beat faster, and embarrassed, I released her, afraid that she
would know.
                                
She looked up at me and smiled.  A mischievous and knowing smile.  Her arms were still around
      me and her lower body was tight against me yet too.
                                
           "Hmmm...why did you stop hugging me Russ?"
                                
                    "I...uh...well...you..."
                                
               "Got a bit turned on didn't you?"
                                
  "No...well...yes.  But I didn't want you to think that I..."
                                
"Russ, you are the first man to ever treat me decently.  You have given me so much and I have
  given you nothing in return. It's alright if you want to..."
                                
"NO.  Look Shannon, you are a bright and beautiful young lady.  I'm older by far and truthfully, I
              just want to help you.  That's all."
                                
"Hmmm, well, you should remind your cock then Russ.  It's got a mind of it's own it seems.  I
       didn't know that you were so well endowed either."
                                
I pushed her away.  She had begun to grind her crotch into mine, and my erection, which had
sprung up while hugging her, had given me away.  I was shaken.  My mind was racing, looking
for answers to questions that I hadn't even thought to ask of it yet.
                                
"You have an effect on me Shannon.  It isn't good.  I'm too old for you and..."
                                
"Russ, Russ, Russ.  I've had far older than you.  I ‘ve had older, younger, meaner, nastier, and
even more dangerous men than you.  But never once a man so nice and thoughtful as you. I think
that you and I having it off in bed together would be fun...even great.  After all, I do owe you
                            still."
                                
"You don't owe me anything.  Look, I want to help you with no strings attached.  Can't you just
       leave it at that?  We can't have...we can't do..."
                                
"Oh really?  I have what you need Russ.  A nice warm pussy, shaved, wet, ready for you.  Your
cock is nice sized, and very hard.  I'm an adult, so are you.  You are free and so am I.  Look, I
want...no...I need you Russ.  I need you to fuck me hard...all night long.  I want you to make love
to me too.  I want you to be the first man to actually make love to me.  Please?  Make love to
                              me?"
                                
            "Oh God...Shannon...I...I...just can't."
                                
"Give me a chance.  Give yourself a break Russ.  You need a woman.  You need a woman's
touch. 
I want to be that woman.  I want to be your woman.  Let me be your lover.  You know that you
want to deep down inside.  I have seen you look at me.  I have seen your hard-ons at different
                  times, I know you want me."
                                
"It's not what I wanted.  I just wanted to help you Shannon.  I didn't have any ulterior motive. 
   I'm not trying to trap you into fu...having sex with me."
                                
"God Russ...I know that.  You have been so nice and good.  Getting me help, offering to send me
to college, everything you have done for me.  In that time in the hospital I...I came to love you
Russ.  I love you.  Is it because of my past?  Is that it?  I'm STD free you know.  They checked
me several times."
                                
"No, it's not the STD's.  You love me?  Like a father perhaps.  I'm so old compared to you.  I
           love you too Shannon.  But...I... you..."
                                
"You really need to let loose and tell me what's on your mind Russ.  You love me, I love you. 
Lovers should fuck.  Pretty simple.  We need to try each other out a bit in the ol' sack.  I'm dying
for a good fuck and I know that you have been for a longer time than I have too."
                                
Saying that Shannon began to strip off her clothes.  I was shocked, then mesmerized as I watched
her body come into view.  I didn't stop her, I never even tried to stop her.  I just watched as she
 took off all of her clothes and then stood before me naked.  
                                
Her breasts were jutting out, firm and ripe for plucking.  I could see her clean-shaven pussy, wet
with her desire.  Her body was open and her obvious comfort with showing herself to me made it
                  very hard for me to breathe.
                                
I stood there like a statue and she began to undress me after a bit.  Again, I did nothing to stop
her,
letting my clothes be removed from my body as she undid them.  My cock was throbbing as she
pulled my underwear and pants down my legs and her face was just inches away from it.
                                
I could feel her hot breath as her hands caressed my legs starting from my ankles.  Suddenly, her
tongue shot out and licked the head of my cock in a long swiping motion.  I moaned, holding still,
loving the feeling of that tongue, yet afraid of who was giving that feeling to me.
                                
"Mmmm...Little Russ, meet my tongue and lips.  They have been wanting to get to know you for
                     quite some time now."
                                
Her voice cut through the thickened air in a warm and sensual way, causing my cock to throb and
bounce in front of her.  The next thing I felt was her lips encircling my shaft, and tightly holding it
as she pressed her head down, down, down.  She didn't stop until her lips were grinding against
             my pubic hairs at the base of my cock.
                                
She slowly moved back up and I opened my eyes to see her eyes on me.  Looking into each others
eyes, I could see a smile of sorts as her lips pulled off my cock, then before I could do anything,
she pressed those lovely lips around my shaft and took me fully into her throat again, watching me
                          as she did.
                                
Her eyes never left mine as she began to shove my shaft back and forth, sucking my cock with an
experience and knowledge that no woman had ever shown to me before.  Shannon wasn't doing
this out of duty or because she had to.  She was doing this because she wanted to.  She was
making love to me with her mouth and throat.  I could see that in her eyes and in the way she
                        worked me over.
                                
I wiped a tear away from my right eye.  Embarrassed, I broke eye contact and looked around the
room, then closed my eyes, enjoying the feelings and touch of a lover's tongue and lips.  I knew at
that moment that I had loved her for quite some time.  I finally admitted it to myself.  I loved her.
                                
My emotions were running all over the place.  I kicked myself mentally.  I was a man, not
supposed to cry over stuff like this.  I just couldn't help myself.  All this time since Laura had died,
and now I finally find someone to love.   I was torn because of the wonderful blow-job I was
getting, the feelings of love and need deep inside me coming out full force, and of course the age
                          of my lover.
                                
I put my thoughts behind me, wanting to enjoy this sexual encounter to it's fullest.  For the first
time in years I felt alive and I wanted to keep this feeling forever.  I placed my hands gently on
Shannon's head, feeling her hair as she began to bob up and down on my hardened shaft.
                                
She brought me right up to the edge of my orgasm, then backed off, holding me close but not
letting me go over.  She was a master at this and I had no choice but to let her do her work.  After
a bit, she pulled off my cock and moved to hold me close.  I picked her up, since we were still
   standing in the kitchen, and carried her into my bedroom. 
                                
Her bottom cheeks ground against my hardness as I carried her, her arms around my shoulders. 
She was kissing me all over my neck and cheeks, almost causing me walk into some furniture on
the way.
                                
Laying her on the bed I moved up between her legs on my knees.  I began to kiss her thighs,
licking
and sucking gently as I worked my way up, moving to her now dripping wet slit.  I could smell
her
              need, and my need was pushing me too.
                                
When my tongue first ran along her pussy lips, she moaned loudly, and grabbed my head in her
hands.  I let her guide me, but I kept control of my tongue, holding it close in until she let up a bit
on my head.  I began to give her long slow licks around and up through her pussy, tasting her
need,
                       loving that taste.
                                
She was shaking, moaning, and soon, crying.  I kept up a steady rhythm, licking and sucking her
pussy as lovingly as I could.  I worked her up and over into her first orgasm.  Her hands held me
tightly to her spasming pussy as she came hard, then relaxed a bit shortly afterwards. 
                                
I moved my tongue to the sides and around her lips, being careful to not touch her now very
sensitive clit.  I licked and sucked a bit more, until she began to squirm around, getting worked up
                             again.
                                
As she got close to cumming again, I backed off and moved up between her legs, letting my cock
rub her wet pussy lips and clit for a bit.  Our lips met and our tongues tangled in a heated and
         passionate duel to explore each other's mouth.
                                
She moved her hips down a bit and suddenly her hand wrapped around my shaft and guided it to
the
mouth of her hot and wet opening.  Holding me firmly, she rubbed the head of my cock around
her
       hole until neither of us could stand it anymore.  
                                
"God I want your cock in me.  It's so big and hard.  I've waited so long for this moment too."
                                
Releasing me, she rolled her hips up and took me fully into her very tight and wet pussy as I froze
with the intensity of the moment.  It felt so wonderful, so hot...so wet...so...my mind was in
overdrive with the feelings and emotions of the moment that I just couldn't think at all.  It had
been
        so long since I had done anything close to this.
                                
Shannon bit my lip pretty hard, bringing me back to reality.  I began to thrust in and out of her
clasping tightness, loving each little bit of movement along the way.  Soon I was driving hard in
and
out, grinding on my thrusts forward.  Shannon was moaning and screaming as we fucked.  I
actually
  worked up a sweat, as we joined like two animals in the wild.
                                
"Umm...baby, fuck me.  Give me your hard cock.  Yessss...Ohhhhh...fuck me Russ.  Harder!"
                                
My orgasm washed over me just as I felt Shannon's hit her.   I became lost in the spaces of mind-
bending pleasures and shot my copious load deeply inside her.  I could feel Shannon's pussy
         muscles working my shaft over, milking me dry.
                                
I rolled off of her body and pulled her in close to me, hugging her tightly.  Together we laid there
not speaking, just enjoying each other's presence.  After a bit, Shannon moved to roll up on top of
                me and began to kiss me all over.
                                
I held my arms around her as she showered me with kisses.  Our tongues met and fought a bit,
then
we were kissing as lovers.  Her hands on my cheeks as she drove her tongue in and around my
    mouth, seeking out to touch me in places she hadn't yet.
                                
She began to move down, licking my nipples, and then my belly button a bit, before taking my
soft
cock, wet with our juices, into her mouth.  Soon, she skillfully had me hard as steel again.  This
time she kept sucking on me for quite some time, and as I got close to cumming, she looked into
         my eyes.  She pulled off me long enough to say:
                                
"Fill my mouth.  I want to taste your cum Russ.  Fill my mouth with your cum."
                                
This would be a first ever for me.  Even Laura had never taken a load of my cum into her mouth
at
any time.  Shannon looked into my eyes and kept sucking and licking, begging in between for me
to
                       cum in her mouth. 
                                
Soon I was close and sensing that, Shannon took me fully into her mouth and down her throat,
watching me.  I felt the stirrings and then began to orgasm.  Shannon never let up, keeping me
buried in her throat as I shot off my second load.  Afterward, as I came back down, she licked and
                      sucked me all clean.
                                
 Moving back up into my arms, she snuggled in close and held me.
                                
"I love you Russ.  This is the first time I have ever had sex with someone I loved like I love you. I
wanted to give myself to you.  Thank you for accepting me Russ."
                                
"Oh Shannon, I love you too.  I am so happy that...well, we found each other.  I needed to love
you
            I think.  And I do...I really love you."
                                
"Yeah?  You needed to love me huh?  Hmmm.   More like you needed to get your rocks off.  You
             shot a huge load in me both times too."
                                
  Embarrassed at her twist of my words, I looked into her eyes.
                                
"Shannon, I do love you.  I'm not sure when nor even why, but I do love you."
                                
"Yeah, I know. Look, I'm in love with you, you're in love with me, but we need to go slow with
any relationship thingy okay?  Someday my past will come up and you will have problems with
it."
                                
"Don't you think I have beat myself up over this very thinking already?  I just want to accept you
into my life Shannon.  I need you, and you need me, well you needed me.  Now, you can do
whatever you choose.  Your life ahead is open to what you may want to do for yourself.  If our
relationship is in that picture, then I'll be a very happy man.  Regardless of your past.  I know I
love you.
                                
Several weeks passed and we made love constantly.  I'd come home from work and Shannon
would
have dinner ready, the house cleaned, and anxiously wait for me to eat so she could begin to strip
me naked.  I found that she was sexually a very aggressive and horny young lady.  I had my hands
                full trying to keep up with her.
                                
"You know...you'll put me into an early grave what with all this sex we've been having.  I never
even had this much sex with my late wife.  You're wearing me out Shannon."
                                
    Looking into my eyes seriously, she thought for a moment.
                                
"Russ, if you want me to back off I will.  I'm just so happy at the moment.  I've never been
happier. 
I have you, I'm in love, and I'm living better than I ever have before in my life.  You make me so
happy and I know you love me so much, I can't help but wanting to fuck your eyeballs out every
day."
                                
"Well, I love that too.  I'm just saying that someday I will slow down.  Wether by my own choice
or nature taking over for me.  But I do love you in either event.  That I want you to know for
sure.  I've been thinking too...about you...me...everything."
                                
 "Uh-oh.  You've been thinking huh?  About us?  What about us?"
                                
"Well, where do you want to go to school at?  What do you want to be?  Where do you see us in
the future?  A month, a year, ten years?  I'm curious what you are thinking about us."
                                
"Oh.  Well, I've thought that we would talk about it sooner or later.  I'd like to go to school yes. 
I'm not sure where or when.  I'd like to try to get a degree in mechanical engineering if I can.  I'd
also...that is to say...you and I could...well...what are your thoughts Russ?"
                                
                           "About us?"
                                
                             "Yes."
                                
"I know you want to take it slow.  I'm so much older than you and..."
                                
         "Age doesn't matter to me Russ, you know that."
                                
"Ok...I know.  But...well, I'd like to ummm...you know...I'd like for us to
        have...some...permanence in our...relationship."
                                
                  "Permanence?  Like married?" 
                                
"Uh...yeah.  I'd be very happy if you would marry me Shannon.  I'd really like that a lot."
                                
                           "My past."
                                
"I don't care.  I love you.  I want you.  I don't care what others may think of it all.  I mean...how
many times have you been called my daughter now...four or five that I know of?"
"Yeah.  Five times.  It doesn't bother me, but I am afraid of what you think when that happens?  I
would love nothing better than to be your wife.  To be your best friend, lover and all that goes
with
it doesn't require us to be married though.  I don't want you to feel obligated to ask me to marry
you because we have been having sex Russ.  Or because you feel you owe it to me.  After all, my
             past hasn't reared it's ugly head yet."
                                
"Shannon, right now you are my best friend my lover and my companion.  I think we should get
married.  I want you to wear a wedding band that I give you, put on your finger. Just as I want to
wear one from you that you put there for me too.  I know we haven't been together very long and
all.  I know that I'm quite a bit older than you too.  The one thing I know above all else...is...I love
                   you.  I truly do love you."
                                
"Can we wait a few months before we decide Russ?  I mean, trouble may still come up and you
may
change your mind.  Or I may change my mind.  If we get married, I want it to be forever.  That's
what I always wanted as little girl growing up.  Be married and in love with my husband.  But I
want to be very sure before I go there.  Mostly for you than me.  After all, my past as a hooker
and
drug addict are not the best qualifications for a spouse are they?"
                                
We decided to put any talk of marriage on hold for six months.  Marked on the calendar in bold
red
marker that date we would talk about marriage again.  I fixed my sights on that date and lived
each
            moment for the day we would be married. 
                                
One day, three months after our talk, I got a phone call at work.  It was Shannon and she sounded
upset. I picked up her message off the answering machine and left for home immediately, worried
about her.  Arriving home there was nobody there.  I noted the open back door and a broken glass
on the kitchen floor.  Looking around for a bit I could find no sign of her.  I got in my car and
drove around, looking for any sign of my love.  Nothing.  It was as if she had been swallowed
                   whole by some unseen force.
                                
Then, after some thinking I drove past where I had first seen her.  Looking around as I sat in my
car, parked on that street I scanned the buildings.  One window was open above the stoop where I
had first seen her giving Alphonse the money for the drugs she was buying.  For just brief instant
    she was silhouetted there, then the curtains were drawn. 
                                
I grabbed the tire iron out of the trunk of my car and ran up the stairs to that floor.  I walked
down
the hallway, listening at each door until I finally heard a loud argument behind one.  I could hear
      Shannon yelling something and that was all it took. 
                                
I put my shoulder against the door and it fell open.  It hadn't been locked. There was Shannon and
Alphonse arguing in the living room. As I approached Alphonse Shannon was staring at me with
                        relief and fear.
                                
        "Yo...what the fuck you doing in my crib sucker?"
                                
                                
               "Lets go Shannon.  Time to leave."
"Yo...the slut ain't going anywhere's with you.  You just get the fuck outta here before you gets
                          hurt honkey."
                                
He had moved to face me and I swung the tire iron that I had held behind my back during my
entrance.  Hitting him alongside the head he went down hard and while not out cold, he was quite
                          disoriented.
                                
I took Shannon by the hand and we ran down to the car and raced out of there.  She was against
me
all the way home and crying.  Clinging to me as we walked inside the house she started to calm
                              down.
                                
"He just walked in.  Drug me out the back door to his car.  He...h...h...he was parked in the alley. 
He forced me inside and then took me to his place.  He was mad.  Very mad.  I think he would
have
killed me Russ.  I really do.  I've ever seen him so angry.  He was yelling that no wh...wh...whore
of
                his ever ran out on him...ever."
                                
"It's all right Shannon.  Your safe with me now.  I'm going to call the cops.  He kidnaped you and
that is against the law.  He's in for some serious trouble now."
                                
"They won't do anything.  It will all come out Russ.  The cops will find out I used to be one of his
             girls and that will be the end of it."
                                
"Not if I have any say it won't.  He is about to find out that you are not one of his girls anymore
and that I will protect you as best I can too.  I know just who to call too.  Officer...Watson.  He
kinda knows me.  I think he will press hard on this.  He's an upright kind of man."
                                
"But...what about afterwards.  They won't keep him very long.  He has good lawyers working for
                   him. They'll get him off."
                                
"Let me take care of it all Shannon.  It will be all right.  Trust me."
                                
I called the cops and officer Watson was who they sent over at my request.  We talked about
what
had happened since that day in the hospital and he looked around the house.  He seemed to
believe
        what I told him and I held nothing back from him.
                                
"Well Russ...I'll make sure that Alphonse goes down for this.  Kidnapping is something that he
has
done in the past but there were no witnesses to the event and he got off.  Never found the body or
the person that he kidnapped either.  His record will take him down."
                                
Arrested that afternoon Alphonse made the evening news.  His bail was refused and he was
remanded over for trial.  A few weeks after that Shannon and I were sitting at breakfast when the
                           phone rang.
                                
                            "Hello?"
                                
                  "Russ?  Officer Watson here."
                      "Oh, hi.  What's up?"
                                
"Thought you would want to know.  Alphonse died last night in jail."
                                
                     "What?  What happened?"
                                
"He picked a fight with the wrong guy.  Something about a bad deal a long time back came up in
it
too.  He won't be standing trial now.  But he got that jailhouse justice it seems."
                                
I told Shannon and she wept.  Not for Alphonse, but in relief.  That evening I took her in my arms
and hugged her.  Then, not letting her go, I asked her the question that had been on my mind for
so
                            long now.
                                
              "Shannon...will you please marry me?"
                                
    She said nothing keeping her head buried in my shoulder.
                                
"Shannon?  Please?  Marry me?  I can't go on like this.  I love you so much.  I know you have
      feelings for me too.  Please...lets just get married.
                                
I felt her shoulders shaking then.  Her hot tears on my neck and her breathing jumpy she pushed
                          back from me.
                                
"Yes.  Yes.  Yes I'll marry you Russ.  I've wanted nothing more than that ever since that day you
saved me in that place of Al...Alphonse's.  I wasn't sure you still felt that way about me...it hadn't
             come up.  But yes...I will marry you."
                                
As she said that last bit she attacked me.  Shannon had my shirt and pants off in seconds and was
working on my shoes as I struggled to keep standing.  Then she pushed me backwards until I fell
                        onto the couch. 
                                
Sprawled out there she reached down and grabbing my pants, jerked them off my legs and threw
herself onto my body.  Rubbing and touching me all over she proceeded to kiss me, then kissing
me
down...down...down until my hard cock was receiving all her attention. 
                                
Looking into my eyes, her's still full of tears, she began to suck on my cock.  Never losing eye
contact with me, she worked me over until I began to cum.  I shot off in her mouth and she
                   swallowed all I gave her. 
                                
Still staying there, she sucked and kissed and licked me until I was hard once again.  Then she
moved up and straddling my lap, took my hard shaft into her tight pussy.  Rocking around and up
and down, she fucked me for a long time.  Her arms around me, our lips together, tongues
                           exploring.
                                
My orgasm was a long and very strong one.  For whatever reason, it seemed so much better now
that she had said yes to marrying me.  Mind over matter?  I didn't care...I was in love and loving
          every second of my soon to be wife's loving.
                                
It was a warm spring day as we stood on the green grass at the cemetery.  Shannon placed the
vase
         of flowers on Laura's headstone as I stood by.
                                
"I think you'd love her Laura.  She just graduated with her B.S. in Mechanical Engineering.  I
know
              I love her, as much as I loved you."
                                
          "What'd you say Russ?  I couldn't hear you."
                                
              "Oh...I was just mumbling to myself."
                                
  "Oh really?  I've never heard you mumble to yourself before."
                                
"Okay...I was just telling Laura about you.  How much I loved you, how you just graduated and
                          everything."
                                
            "Oh.  That's a good thing...right Russ?"
                                
"Oh yes...a very good thing.  You know...I think that Laura would have loved you too."
                                
"Maybe.  But if she hadn't died and things gone the way they did, we would have probably never
met.  Besides, I was a hooker then, and most wives are...lets just say they don't care for hookers. 
Like me...I know you had never bring a hooker home or matter of fact, have anything to do with a
              hooker as long as I'm around buster."
                                
                           "Yes dear."
                                
                 "Don't you yes dear me bucko."
                                
She was smiling as we walked away.  In my heart, I know that marrying Shannon was the right
  thing to do and I also know that Laura was ok with that too.
                                
                                
                                
                                
                                
                                
