Celestial Reviews 12 - August 16, 1995 - by Celeste

Note:  This set of reviews includes some complex stories - or at least 
complex reviews.  If you don't want to think too hard, just read "The 
Case of the Tingling Clitoris," "Hold at Minot," or "Prom Date" and 
skip my reviews.  No hard feelings.  (Heh-Heh.)  On the other hand, I'd 
be happy to hear your thoughts about any of the issues I raise in these 
reviews.

Also, my thanks to several people who sent (or offered to send) copies 
of Katie & Lyn 2.  Stop!  Go out and masturbate or something.  I don't 
need any more copies!  I didn't realize how many people read these 
Reviews!  I'll review Katie & Lyn next time; but I can already tell you 
I recommend that set of stories.

      "Consequences of Peeping" by Rolf (voyeurism & femdom) 
            7.5
      "Aegean Interludes" by Deidre Ng (exotic romance) 9
      "Droit du Signeur" by Lysander (medieval romance) 7
      "Short 1.0" by Wiley03 (violent rape) 7
      "eXstacy" by Wiley03. (violent rape) 1
      "Hold at Minot" by Erostos (gay aviator sex) 10
      "Best Friends" by Erik Campos (teen nerd sex) 5
      "The Case of the Tingling Clitoris" by Dr. Watson (sex
          and the master detective) 10
      "Susan Hampton" by Unknown Author (seduced by the devil)
           5
      "Lessons in Lust" by Kid Dynamite (non-brutal D&s) 10

"Consequences of Peeping" by Rolf.  Little Timmy decides to spy on his 
older cousin while she takes her bath.  She catches him and punishes 
him by making him her sexual slave for the rest of the afternoon.  I 
normally turn off to stories about adults having sex with little kids; 
but this one was OK - I guess because the kid was asking for it.  The 
"punishment" was basically the fulfillment of his early adolescent 
fantasies.  The author does a good job of making the story sound like 
something that really happened.  (Rating: 7.5)

"Aegean Interludes" by Deidre Ng.  This story consists of two parts, 
each written from a different perspective.  One sets a mood for 
romantic sex on a remote beach and the other in a hotel room.  The sex 
is quietly passionate and romantic.  I liked the story, but the changes 
in mood and verb tense bothered me.  I'm used to perfection from this 
writer!  (Rating: 9)

"Droit du Signeur" by Lysander.  Nice story!  That was my reaction 
after I read the first chapter and plunged ahead into the second.  This 
tale takes place in Germany during feudal times.  In those days the 
lord of the serfs had the right to have sexual relations with a new 
bride on her wedding night.  The hero and heroine in this story 
initially resist this as a barbaric custom; but eventually they comply.

This story borders on greatness.  At the end of the third chapter, I 
was truly impressed.  But then the author gets sidetracked on tales 
about warfare and torture. These chapters are not bad; in fact they're 
good - but perhaps a little too detailed.  The problem is that the 
author never gets back to a full treatment of the sex and romance.  All 
of a sudden the story just ends, and we are informed that Heinrich 
married Esmeralda (who is barren) after miraculously rescuing her from 
Assan and that Kirsten will have Heinrich's baby.  There's a lot more 
room for development and resolution here.  For example, how will Tomas 
(Kirsten's husband) react to this state of affairs, and how does 
Kirsten feel about her husband?

When sex occurs, it is really hot.  In addition, the plot allows room 
for real sexual tension and creative character development.  Assume 
that there really is a rule that the lord gets the bride on the wedding 
night and that the bride can help her husband (who has attacked the 
lord) only by making the lord as happy as possible.  She expects the 
lord to be an asshole; but instead he turns out to be a responsible 
ruler and kind lover, whose happiness apparently arises from making her 
happy.  How should she react?  There's an important moral and emotional 
angle here, which is worth developing: should she let herself go and 
enjoy the pleasures she has been offered, or should she hold back her 
true affection for her husband?  If she does react favorably to the 
lord and if she does conceive a child, how will this affect her love 
for her husband?  And then there's Esmeralda.... These and many other 
dilemmas could make this into a story that is not only titillating, but 
also just plain good literature.  

The author starts with a great plot for the first few chapters - a plot 
that involves real personalities - and then settles for a war story, 
purely hormonal sex, and an ending that leaves us hanging.  At the 
beginning, this story reminded me a lot of the movie "Indecent 
Proposal," in which Demi Moore's husband was offered a million dollars 
if he would let her sleep with a rich guy who looked a lot like Robert 
Redford.  But "Indecent Proposal" maintained the moral and potential 
ambivalence all the way to the end of the story.  In addition, Demi 
Moore's sexual activity was not purely hormonal.  I hope the author of 
this story realizes what he has here and goes back and turns it into 
the work of art it could become.  (Rating: 7)

"Short 1.0" by Wiley03.  This story is one of a series with similar 
names that all depict violent rape.  The rape scenes all seem to be 
realistic; they correspond with descriptions I have heard from more 
scientific and personal sources.  If you're looking for a horror story, 
this one may be a good one.  However, the author seems to have a notion 
that the victim of rape typically attains some sort of "agonizing 
pleasure."  I've mentioned this topic in several of my reviews, and let 
me summarize what some of my readers have told me.  It is important to 
understand that almost all women who experience a violent rape come 
away with negative feelings about sexual activity (which would 
otherwise evoke positive feelings).  Almost no women learn to love 
sexual activity as a result of being raped.  Whereas healthy or mature 
sexual activity leads a feeling of pleasure that is both physical and 
psychological, the "agonizing pleasure" the woman may feel at a time 
like this is usually a purely physiological reaction.  Many women who 
are raped feel guilty, because they incorrectly feel that this 
physiological reaction implies consent or acquiescence; and some 
rapists feel exonerated, because the victim "enjoys it anyway."

The notion that the woman feels this "agonizing pleasure" may give 
readers a feeling that the rapist is doing her a favor.  Actually, 
(although we have few details about him) the rapist in this story fits 
the profile of a selfish asshole who can't get his way with a woman 
through civilized channels.  

Having said this, I must add that Wiley03 seems to have a good ability 
to describe the horror and pain inflicted by selfish assholes on 
innocent victims. I personally don't like certain types of unrealistic 
horror movies - where the only purpose is to terrify the viewer; but 
the movie makers seem to find a good audience for them.  What bothers 
me is that people find it pleasant to fantasize about this kind of 
degrading sexual activity.  In addition, the present story has problems 
with grammatical structures that may make it difficult to understand.  
(Rating: 7)

"eXstacy" by Wiley03.  This story (like the previous) is a repost.  
This one demonstrates the lack of power that I have as a reviewer.  
You'd think that an author might at least have the dignity to remove 
some of the more egregious errors from a story before reposting it.  I 
mean, isn't the author at all concerned that some of this crap makes no 
sense whatsoever?  I guess maybe I should be relieved; it's not likely 
that many bright young men and women are going to be seduced into 
depraved activity by a story this badly written.  (The rest of this 
review {which is well written} is exactly the same as it was in 
Celestial Reviews 2.)

This is the kind of story Beevis and Butthead used to enjoy before they 
learned to pick their noses and masturbate.  What we have here is a 
quasi-literate description of a guy and his faithful sidekick who 
kidnap a girl and juice her up with electrical current before they rape 
her.  Then they relax for a while by hanging her from a hook from the 
ceiling of the warehouse, while they beat her with a whip and a cane 
before they rape her again.  The sex is oral, anal, and vaginal; and, 
like most women, she realizes that she likes it and yearns for more.

I guess this is the sort of crap Senator Exon is upset about.  It makes 
me feel kinda foolish about advocating free speech.  Here's one of the 
greatest quotes, lifted directly with my cut-and-paste tool, so that I 
could avoid the risk of altering even a single sibilant syllable:  "Her 
eyes slits, her mouth pouting and mewling, she slinked her way across 
the floor until she was between his legs, her prick jutting obscenely 
before her."  It really said that.  Earlier in the story, the hero (or 
villain - I'm kinda confused here)  "...arranged himself in a beanbag 
while he slowly approached her."  People that can do that are 
dangerous.

On a more serious note, the heroine/victim/love-object was expecting to 
get paid with a "twenty day supply of X" but she was hoping for more 
like "a years (sic) supply of X."  Maybe I'm out of touch, but am I 
supposed to know what X is?  I don't know if the author was using X as 
a place holder and forgot to change it to cocaine or chocolate candy or 
something, whether there really is a commodity called X that she hoped 
to acquire as compensation for her services, or whether the author just 
has an extreme respect for copyright laws and doesn't want to mention 
the trade name of the beverage the players would consume to slake their 
thirst after the festivities.  

In spite of these brilliancies, there were some minor flaws in the 
story.  As our damsel put it so eloquently, while her lithe body jerked 
uncontrollably on the hook: "Aaahhgg, no, arrgh, please, uh uh stop 
please." (Rating: 1)

"Hold at Minot" by Erostos.  Because of my own sexual preferences, I 
don't actively seek out gay stories.  But this author was kind enough 
to send me a set of six stories, most of which seem to deal with gay 
sex among aviators.  They're delightful.  The main thing they have 
going for them is that they put the sexual activity into a context that 
makes good sense. This author either *is* a pilot or he watches The 
Learning Channel real carefully.  I particularly enjoyed the pickup 
lines of the gay pilot, who was basically trying to find out if the 
other pilot was likewise gay and interested in a liaison: "I could use 
an approaching warm front just about now." Or how about this reply: 
"...there's considerable moisture in these two converging fronts that 
we're gonna have to deal with over the next twenty-four hours." Or this 
one: "Moisture in fronts like these can build up only so far before 
having to release explosively."  You get the picture.  To a certain 
degree, this story breaks through the barriere (How's that for a 
Freudian misspelling!) between gays and heterosexuals.  I mean,  I 
would rather hear pickup lines like these than have a guy look me in 
the eye and say, "What's a nice girl like you doing in an airport like 
this? " or even whisper in my ear, "Laugh if you want me to fuck your 
brains out."  An extremely clever and intelligent story!  (Rating: 10)

"Best Friends" by Erik Campos.  This is probably a much better story 
than my rating indicates.  However, the grammar is so confusing that I 
can't figure out exactly what it's about.  The story uses technical and 
scientific terminology to give a light-hearted presentation of playful 
sex between a boy and girl computer nerd - I think.  (Rating: 5)

"The Case of the Tingling Clitoris" by Dr. Watson.  A client's 
innocence can be established only by demonstrating her sexual prowess.  
How will Sherlock Holmes accomplish this?  And did you know that the 
master detective once authored a small monograph on the recognition and 
cleaning of hundreds of fabrics from the stains left by sexual 
activities, whether autoerotic or communal?  This latter information 
was quite valuable to Dr. Watson, who engaged in certain manual 
activities while observing the proceedings from a secluded spot nearby.  
Superb story!  (Rating: 10)

"Susan Hampton" by Unknown Author.  I received this story by e-mail with a 
note that said the author respected my opinion and that her Master had told 
her to send it to me.  I assume it will be posted shortly.  The story is about 
a woman who comes into a shop to look for a job and is seduced by the shop 
owner to be his sexual partner for all eternity.  I assume the shop owner is a 
demon or the devil.  The seducer exercises mind control over the woman, who 
buys into his seduction and is rewarded with near ecstasy for eternity.  Of 
course *near* ecstasy ranks right up there with the problems faced by Tantalus 
and Sysyphus and all the giants of literature (and Buffalo football fans) who 
have suffered great torment because a goal was just barely beyond their reach.

Let's assume that the seducer in this story is the devil.  Even if one doesn't 
hold a specific theological dogma about the devil, there is a mythology about 
the devil that permeates our culture.  Or actually several mythologies.  For 
the past several months, the popular American daytime drama "Days of Our 
Lives" has had a leading character who was possessed by the devil.  According 
to my friend who is a Catholic priest, this was "pure bullshit theology" and 
not even Mother Angelica believes that possessions and exorcisms take place 
the way they did in that show; but the story was extraordinarily creative.  I 
didn't believe any of that nonsense could actually happen, but I watched 
everyday.  The problem is that eventually the writers had to make up a 
mythology that was so esoteric and complex that it became just plain silly.  
As near as I can figure, the writers eventually just gave up and declared 
Marlana to be cured - or dispossessed or whatever you call it.  

The point is, even if we don't take a theological position, a reader expects 
devils to follow some ground rules.  I think both "Days" and the present story 
have problems with their ground rules.  This story departs from reality as I 
know it.  (Neither I nor the author would really prefer to sell our soul to 
the devil as an alternative to a life with a responsive partner who would love 
and cherish us.  But it may be fun to look at live through an alternate 
reality.)  Both the person writing this story and her Master probably 
understand a set of ground rules that enable them to enjoy this story.  
Unfortunately, many of those ground rules are implicit; and I cannot enjoy the 
story fully, because I don't know what these ground rules are.  It is 
distinctly possible that I am the aberrant minority - that most other readers 
will understand these ground rules and enjoy the story.  (It's also possible, 
of course, that people who do understand the ground rules will find this to be 
a terrible story.  But I doubt it.)  I think that the really good stories 
cover both possibilities: people who don't know the ground rules can pick up 
enough from the story to enjoy it, and people who do know the ground rules 
will enjoy it even more.  For example, the Sherlock Holmes story reviewed 
earlier is probably enjoyable to all readers but even more enjoyable to 
prurient Baker Street Irregulars.  Likewise, the "Tie Fighter" story that I 
reviewed so favorably was good because it could be understood by both Star 
Wars enthusiasts and ordinary perverts wanting to read about a guy having sex 
with a female who had a special muscle in her cunt.... Sorry, that's the wrong 
review.

American society uses lots of images of the devil.  "The devil made me 
do it!"  "She was an angel in the morning, but a devil in my arms at 
night."  We even name our football and basketball teams after devils 
and demons.  The only demonic story I ever really enjoyed (aside from 
the immortal country western song "The Devil Went Down to Georgia") was 
"The Devil and Daniel Webster" by Stephen Vincent Benet.  In that story 
a man sells his soul to the devil and then wishes he hadn't done so; 
and Daniel Webster argues the man's case and wins.  I would love to see 
somebody take up the challenge of writing a sexual version of that one.  
Whatever happened to happy endings?I think this is probably a good 
story for people interested in such myths.  (Rating: 5)

"Lessons in Lust" by Kid Dynamite.  In the past, when I have reviewed D&s 
stories, I have been unable to understand the point of the stories.  Why would 
anyone want to undergo degradation and humiliation in order to achieve a 
sexually submissive status?  An analogy that I have used is this: if it's a 
bad idea for slave owners to beat people in order to make them pick cotton 
more efficiently, why is it a good idea to torture women (or men) in order to 
make them better sexual playthings?

This story gave me a different insight into D&s.  It's about a college-age 
girl who is staying with her wealthy aunt and cousin and is being trained by 
them in the arts of lust.  The "punishments" in this story consist not of 
whippings and electrical shocks (as in some other stories of this genre), but 
rather sexual "punishments," such as being brought to an orgasm under 
embarrassing circumstances or being required to reveal shameful thoughts to 
the mistress.  In a certain sense these events are not really "punishments" - 
they feel bad only because they are associated with a sense of shame, and 
(according to the philosophy upon which the story is based) this sense of 
shame is false and should be abolished.

This is the first D&s story that has ever explained to me the meaning of the 
word "slut."  Here is that the mistress in this story says about the slut:  
"The slut is a perfect creature.  She is strong, free, self-possessed, and 
satisfied.  The struggle inside you is the struggle between 'bad' and 'hot', 
is it not?  These things all seem so 'bad'.  You've probably said to yourself 
'I'm a bad girl,' or 'I can't believe how bad I am.'  Well, it's true.  You 
are a bad girl, Lisa. These things are all 'bad'.  So why do you do them?  
Because they're 'hot.' Bad equals hot, for you, doesn't it?  You secretly long 
to be oh, so bad, because you feel it hit you right here.... "The slut is the 
woman who knows it's bad, but wants it anyway.  Needs it.  Longs for it.  The 
heat inside her drives her beyond 'bad girl' and 'good girl', to simply 
'slut'.  The slut is the woman who listens to her instinct.  Who ignores the 
pathetic notion of 'morality'. There is no 'morality', no 'right' or 'wrong'.  
No 'good' or 'bad'. Only one thing - pleasure.  Only pleasure can free you 
from the hopelessly contradictory, confusing, impossible constraints that hold 
us back."

From the perspective expressed in the preceding paragraph, the girl receiving 
the "training in lust" is not a complete fool who wants to be degraded, but 
rather a person who is undergoing training that will make her superior to 
others.  I personally don't buy this extreme hedonistic philosophy, but at 
least I can understand it.  What I can especially understand is how sane 
people who lead wholesome lives could derive enjoyment from reading and 
thinking about such experiences. 

Having said all these nice things (at least I meant them to be nice), I also 
have to add that parts of the story still seemed silly to me.  At one point, 
for example, we have Lisa wandering about naked with a banana shoved up her 
cunt and a carrot up her ass, with just the carrot greens sticking out.  
Overall, however, it was a good story.  One of the marks of a good author is 
that he/she can present a story in such a way as to make people who differ 
from those in the story suspend reality and temporarily see life from the 
perspective of the characters in the story.  This author (whose very name 
destroys the serious mood of my review) successfully brought me to the point 
where I could say, "If I were Lisa, I think I would feel just the way she 
feels."  (Rating: 10)

"Prom Date" by Ann Douglas.  A young girl is offended when it becomes 
obvious to her that her prom date wants to share her sexually with one 
of his friends after the prom.  After she gets upset and walks home, 
she gets a ride from an older woman with whom she has a warm and 
intimate sexual relationship.  This story had an unusually large number 
of typographical and grammatical errors that detracted from the 
author's otherwise creative work.  (Rating: 9)

"Lady Chatterley's Lover" by D.H. Lawrence  The following is a review of "Lady 
Chatterley's Lover," allegedly printed in "Field and Stream," November, 1959.  
I found this in rec.humor.  I didn't write any of it (except the rating); but 
I wish I did. 

Although written many years ago, "Lady Chatterley's Lover" has just been 
reissued by Grove Press, and this fictional account of the day-by-day life of 
an English gamekeeper is still of considerable interest to outdoor-minded 
readers, as it contains many passages on pheasant raising, the apprehending of 
poachers, ways to control vermin, and other chores and duties of the 
professional gamekeeper. Unfortunately one is obliged to wade through many 
pages of extraneous materials in order to discover and savor these sidelights 
on the management of a Midlands shooting estate, and in this reviewer's 
opinion this book cannot take the place of J. R. Miller's "Practical 
Gamekeeping."  (Rating: 10)

