Corbin

College

Chapter 7

**********


"Far better it is, to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though
checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy
much nor suffer much, because they live in that great twilight that knows
neither victory or defeat."

-Teddy Roosevelt

**********

Just read on and enjoy this story of little ol' me, the quiet rebel I guess.

**********

It's gym day!

I was sitting on my workout bench (well it's not mine, but anyway, you know what I mean) when I 
observe the three stooges in the corner of the weight room and they are all high five's to each other, being 
loud and very gay. Well, they are actually tying to act macho and such, but it really comes off as being 
gay, so fella's tone down the bravado, it's not impressing anyone. Anyway I see them stacking the weights 
on the bar and it appears he is getting ready to do some squats, so one of the stooges positions himself 
under the bar and begins as his spotter is now standing behind him, okay nothing unusual about that, 
except his spotter starts with that obnoxious "COME ON...PUSH!....ONE MORE!..." I hear the weights 
shaking and clanging on the bar as lard ass tries to do a few more beyond what he should. Well he finally 
rests the bar on one of the hooks and steps back, all three morons look pleased with themselves (more 
laughter, back slapping and loudness ensues). And then, well, I'm smiling as I write this, this is when 
justice is served, it actually happens allot when mother nature steps in to dish out a lot of humility. I 
notice them piling on more plates and I raise an eyebrow because I suspect dumb-ass is getting ready to 
try something he's not ready for. So they are drawing some attention from some other wanna-be's at this 
point because Mr. Pretend Weightlifter loudly announces that they have 495lbs on the bar. I roll my eyes 
and smile, looking down at the ground, this clown seems proud of what he is attempting, I am now 
hedging my bets this is not going to go well.

So his spotter is psyching him up for the squat as the guy positions himself under the bar, allot of 
grunting and huffing begins to spew from his face, not to mention the guy looks about ready to pass out. 
He gets the bar off the rack and is really on his own now because his spotter looks deathly thin so I'm not 
sure why he's even pretending to spot. So he goes down for the squat (I know this isn't funny, because it 
can be very dangerous) but the dude isn't coming back up. WELL, WELL, WELL! :) I couldn't help but 
smirk after he got the bar off his shoulders (They were at least smart enough to put the safety bar in place 
so if you go down and can't get back up, you can just roll it off your shoulders). 

Wait a second! They're not so loud now! Where's all the high fives and loud big-man-talk? Hmmm, could 
it be you just let your ego take you down a path you weren't ready to handle? And did the whole gym just 
see it? Why yes we did :)

So the three stooges walk out and I get a better glance over at Mr. Can't-squat-shit-now, noticing that his 
belly seems to be the biggest part of his anatomy...all big and swollen....obviously they had to leave right 
after that, not because he just made an ass out of himself, but probably because the local beer and pizza 
joint is calling, but probably both reasons.

Look people, sometimes you have to leave well enough alone.

**********

Both Sharon and I headed of to Duke University that fall, each excited, yet for very different reasons. The 
big Collage Campus unnerved me a bit, where as Sharon was constantly trying to get involved in new 
things and thrived on the bustle of activity. I was athletically and academically good enough that I almost 
got a full scholarship.  On the positive side, it wasn't difficult to make friends, I was inundated by other 
people who were just as nervous and eager to make friends. Yet my primary focus was on studying and 
nixed the offers to attend several 'social activities' for the first few weeks. 

(You like that term 'social activities'? A sophisticated way of saying, let's go to this party and get shit 
faced! I was appalled at the number of Freshman that seemed determined to piss away their academic 
opportunities right into some kind of probation because they lacked self control.)

"Hey! What's up!" Claire came bursting into our dorm room. Claire was an energetic girl, standing about 
5'5" with short multicolored hair which had a mix of blonde, brown and black. Even with all of that, she 
was pretty with piercing light green eyes and a nice athletic build. She was also on my Gymnastic's Team, 
so I had to make an effort to be cordial toward her, even is she is a complete dope/freak!  

"Hey Claire." I forced a smile.

"Check it out!" Claire said and then stuck her tongue out at both of Sharon and I, a shiny round tongue 
stud protruded proudly. "Holy Shit" Sharon laughed and stood up to take a closer look, but Sharon always 
took stuff like that in stride nothing seemed to faze her. I on the other hand gawked with my eyes bugged 
out as I leaned forward, like I was watching a car wreck unfold.

"Why did you do that?" I asked in horror. Claire recoiled her tongue and while placing her hands on her 
hips looking at me as if I was clueless, "Why do you think?" Claire shook her head and smiled.

"You were bored? Pure shock value?" I sighed. Sharon just smirked at my smart ass reply.

"Haha, hoho, haha...Come'on, take a guess smarty pants!" 

"I just did." I cocked my left eyebrow showing my impatience with this guessing game.

"You really don't know?" Claire looked at me with bewilderment. I reached up with my right hand and 
ran my fingers thru my long blonde hair with frustration several times, shaking my head 'no'.

"Oh she's serious alright, she has no clue." Sharon said.

"Well..." Claire turned back to me, a pleasurable sneer forming on her face as she began, "...besides 'shock 
value', there are certain oral benefits to it."

My face went blank, "I don't understand...never mind, I don't want to know." I raised my right hand as if 
signaling Claire not to proceed any further with an explanation.

"It feels good on a man's dick when you give him a blow job and I bet it would probably feel good going 
down on a girl too, might have to try that one day." Claire blurted out in a very matter-of-fact-like style as 
she stepped in closer, sticking her tongue out, rolling it back and forth in the air playfully. My own mouth 
parted in shock and I leaned back in my chair, "You're joking right, that's not true!" I blurted out.

"Here, you want to touch it!" Claire stepped in and leaned closer to my face.

"NO! Get away!" I spun my chair around and hunched over my desk, "I'm busy, leave me alone, that's 
disgusting sick, gross." Claire just laughed and Sharon leaned over pulling Claire back by her shoulders, 
"Okay let's go." Sharon just giggled.

"Come on my little blonde friend." Sharon said.

"Yeah, come on." Claire insisted.

"HELLO! I am studying!"

"Oh she is SO coming this time." Claire said looking at Sharon as they both smiled at one another. Claire 
and Sharon each made a grab for one of my arms to try and pull me from the desk.

"Hey, hey, stop, wait don't...OKAY! OKAY!" I finally gave in and stood 
up.

"You're not wearing that are you?" Sharon pointed at my clothes. 

I looked down and moaned, "Uhm" I looked down at my outfit, but dug my heels in by shoving my hands 
into my pockets and giving a uncaring shrug, "If I'm going, this is what I'm wearing."

I got two looks of disdain, why? Because I had on these old baggy jeans and an old wrinkled grey tee shirt, 
no makeup (I rarely wear makeup anyway) and my old flip flops.

"What the hell are YOU two looking at?" I asked, "I'm the one that looks normal, you both need to take a 
long look in the mirror, you're the two dressed up like clowns. Makeup, lipstick, hairspray..." I flung my 
hand toward Sharon and Claire as I felt one of my rants coming on.

"Spare me one of your self righteous speeches girlfriend." Claire stood up and dismissed me with a wave 
of her hand and a smile. Sharon just let out a frustrated sigh and stood up, "You clean up real nice, I don't 
understand why you don't wear something sexy and show off that killer body." Sharon takes me by the 
arm and drags me out of the dorm room. She doesn't normally give up so easy, and by the end of the 
second semester my attire would change a bit, mostly due to Sharon's constant nagging. I'm very much 
the anomaly, when doing Gymnastic Events I have my hair pulled back neatly, lots of makeup, glitter crap 
sprinkled in my hair and all that dolled up junk, but ANY other time I am strip off all that crap!

"This is going to be so great, you're first big college bash." Sharon said, walking with her right arm around 
my shoulder now. 

'Great' I sighed with anxiety as we approached the Fraternity House, it was a big, loud party and everyone 
seemed to know everyone else, 'Maybe I can find a corner to disappear into.' Was my first thought, 'No, 
no, think positive!' I told myself. Even with my distant and quiet demeanor (and crap attire) I still seemed 
to draw allot of attention to myself. I refused to slouch when I walked so I stood pretty tall at a fraction 
over 5'11", and my even, solid, muscular definition from years of gymnastics, track and weight lifting was 
still very pretty evident under my clothes. I guess bright, long blonde hair had a gravitational effect on 
guys at the party as well. 

I was not at all used to this 'forward' type of behavior, 'Totally different from the guys in High School.' I 
thought. Most of the conversation-starters came in the attempt to offer me a drink, refill my drink or talk 
about sports. Allot of the guys were shocked I was drinking ice water, often pressuring me into something 
more alcoholic to try and loosen me up some, maybe get me to act a little more uninhibited and flirty. 
Unfortunately when your one of the only sober people in a party full of 'drunks', things can feel a bit on 
the obnoxious side when the alcohol isn't there to dull your senses. Several times I found myself having to 
lean away from guys, that were either just close talkers or perhaps just trying to put 'the moves' on me. I 
marveled at the way Sharon seemed to flow in and out of conversation with guys and girls, being touchy-
flirty one minute while slipping free when their embraces got to greedy. Sharon liked to show off her 
long, athletically lean legs, smooth and tan, which caught every man's attention she came in contact with. 

Even with all of the guys around me, paying me compliments and giving me more attention then I can 
ever remember, I oddly found myself missing Eric, maybe I should have gone with him to Penn State after 
all? 

Sharon was pretty attentive to me, while Claire was nowhere to be found. My nerves were getting fairly 
rattled, like the way you get annoyed when some train rattles past your house over and over again. I had 
never experienced anything like this party; 
'Where are the parents?'
'Where are the School Administrators to make sure things don't get out of hand!'
'How could so much responsibility be placed into the hands of these drunks!!!'

I'm getting very annoyed! There must be order and control! 
I HAVE TO GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!! 
I am out of my comfort zone!

What happened next didn't initially register with me as I felt the palm of someone's hand come to rest on 
my right hip. I looked down and tensed up unsure of what was happening as I felt the warm touch track 
around to the front of my belly; "Are you sure I can't get you something else to drink?" His voice floated 
into my left ear canal in such a casual manner that I half way thought I should have expected it, but the 
way this guy was pulling me in close, against the front of his body set off my 'personal-space' alarms 
instead; 

"What the fuck!" I spat, not loud but definitely above that of a normal speaking tone as my left arm shot 
up and was then quickly retracted. At this point I wasn't even thinking but reacting and not in the most 
logical manner possible. My elbow drove down and into this guys gut with all of my strength, causing his 
body to almost catapult back several feet, knocking into and down, several other people behind him 
when down as well.

"FUCK!" Was the only tangible word he could muster, the rest was a incoherent babble of moaning curses 
as he writhed on the floor, his arms cradling his torso. Hmmm, wow, must have bulls-eyed his gut on that 
one, I thought.

The music continued to blare, but the entire house had ceased it's partying as a disjointed circle formed 
around me and the fallen guy who was quickly trying to get back to his feet. The eerie silence was broken 
when the Fraternity president bolted forward to help the guy up, "What the fuck happened?" he yelled 
down at the guy and then looked up at me.

"He grabbed me!" I stammered as I took a step back, my right foot feeling a plastic cup crush. The level of 
chatter started to rise as a few other friends of the guy stepped forward to help asses the situation. But 
since most everyone was drunk there was little to no rational thinking going on.

"What happened?" a tall sandy haired Frat brother asked.

"I was standing and he just came up and grabbed me from behind, I didn't know who it was or..." I was 
literally starting to shake now; totally embarrassed and feeling tongue-tied, I felt fortunate to be able to 
get that much out as my voice trembled.

The Frat President, Frank I think, had just finished helping the guy up when he glared over at me, 
"Touched you? Where? How?" He asked, but it definitely sounded like a challenge, like I was some 
lunatic that was disrupting their party.

"Like here." I said and placed my hand over my stomach.

"Are you fucking kidding me!" Frank yelled, "That's it? That's no reason to pile drive your elbow into his 
gut!" Frank's sentiments were echoed by several other guys and girls that immediately began to question 
and insult my analysis of the situation and more importantly my reaction. I was nothing more then a deer 
in headlights at the moment, hoping I would vanish into thin air. But in that same moment I felt 
something rising up inside of me, NO I was not going to puke! But a kind of anger, rage, and good ol' 
Frank was about to get a dose of it...

...until Sharon stepped in.

"Shut the fuck up!" Sharon yelled and stepped between the crowd and me, "Don't blame her because your 
inebriated friend decided to cop a feel. What the fuck do you expect? To just act like that shit is okay?" 
Sharon then quickly decided to diffuse the situation by taking me by the hand, quickly leading my out of 
the house. I couldn't help but detect a few glares of detest from some of the guys and girls as I was led out 
of the house, not to mention a comment or two with reference to me being a simple-minded thug, or 
descriptions that essentially equated to such.

"Thanks Sharon." I sighed and took several deep breaths of the cool night, but suddenly Sharon stopped 
and spun around, standing face to face with me, well sort of, I am after all a bit taller.

"What the fuck was that back there? You elbow some guy in the gut? What's wrong with you!"

"What?" I leaned back in shock, "I don't understand, why are you now..." I was perplexed.

But Sharon quickly continued, "Corbin, some guy puts the moves on you and you punch him, you don't 
do that!" Sharon tensed her face.

"I elbowed him." I quietly corrected her.

"What...EVER!" Sharon snapped, "What the hell was that all about?"

"I don't understand, back there you said..."

"Back there I was sticking up for you because you're my friend, but I don't agree with what you did!" 
Sharon jabbed her left finger at me. Oh man Sharon was pissed off all right, she felt like I just might have 
jeopardized her chances of getting into the sorority. But I made no apologizes, I just simply frowned and 
narrowed my eyes.

"Tomorrow, you're going back over there and apologize!" Sharon poked her finger into my right shoulder 
again with more authority which was starting to irritate me.

"You've lost your mind, I'm not doing that!" I snapped and smacked Sharon's hand away with my right 
hand, my heart pounded violently as I stepped around my friend. Sharon stood motionless, like a statue 
at what I just said, "I'm not apologizing to anyone." I casually continued talking into the open air as I 
walked away.

"What did you say to me?" Sharon seethed from behind me and I could hear her quickly walking up 
behind me.

"You heard me," I replied, "Unless English is your second language." I sighed, feeling that smart-ass, kick-
your-ass Corbin starting to come out in me, after all, that angry-me was still simmering just below the 
surface so Sharon better get her attitude in check.

"How dare you." Sharon jerked on my left arm, "You had better stop and answer me I don't deserve that 
after all the crap I do for you." But I just calmly stared right at her.

"Then don't..." I jerked my arm free and leaned in close to Sharon's face which caused her to take a step 
back, "...invite me to anymore of your stupid parties, and stop doing things for me. I never asked you to 
do anything for me, and I certainly don't fit into your socialite world Sharon." 
I turned and continued my fast track to the dorm.

But I did catch a brief look of shock on Sharon's face right before I spun around and started walking.

Suddenly all doubt was erased, I no longer had a moments reservation about what I said or did and as I 
sat down on my bed. Unfortunately another realization was setting in, something Sharon has said; 'After 
all the crap I do for you.' replayed in my mind. That statement seemed to say so much to me as if Sharon 
valued my relationship based on how much appreciation I showed in return, as if it's a privilege to be her 
friend!

I glanced around the room I shared with Sharon my eyes began to drift casually from the chair, to the 
desk, the window, observing how the soft yellowish glow from my desk lamp gave the room a warm, cozy 
quality. "All alone, oh well." I mumbled at the realization that I was 17 years old in College and still as big 
of a social misfit as ever (at least that's how I see myself). Finally I gave a lingering stare to the door, 
Sharon had not followed me back to the room to talk things out, to resolve things, another realization 
that my 'best friend' had most likely chosen to go back to the party.

'What a mess' I thought and then had a strong urge to call Eric. It was late, but I figured he would be up, 
partying, doing something, he's a social guy and probably already had a new girlfriend too. We stayed in 
touch but I didn't want to try and do the long distance dating thing, much to his dismay.

Fourth ring and it will probably go to voicemail, "Hello?" came the voice, "Corbin is that you!" crap he 
answered the phone! I wasn't expecting him too, there was allot of noise in the background, a bar or a 
party, or something was going on.

"Yep it's me." I sighed and smiled a little.

"Hold on, let me go outside." We had a nice talk he was that kind of sweet guy, who would drop anything 
he was doing to help me out.

**********

OK, after Sharon acted like a total jerk to me last night, she wanted to take me to breakfast the next 
morning. She felt bad and damn right she should feel bad. She was the one that dragged me to that 
stupid party I felt no remorse for how I handled that dumb-ass-frat-boy, sending his punk ass sprawling 
all over the floor.

Once we got settled into our booth at the diner, Sharon looked up at me and started in, "We'll, you've 
done it now." Sharon finally said after a much exaggerated 'sigh'.

"Done what?" I looked up from the just served breakfast platter of a bagel and nova.

"That little stunt of yours last night, combined with the way you turn down invites, you're getting a 
reputation as being a VERY stuck up, square girl." Sharon leaned in and drew a square in thin air with her 
finger. 

"Oh, I don't care about that." I shrugged, while spreading some cream cheese on my bagel, practically 
salivating over my masterpiece of breakfast that I was crafting to my liking.

"You don't care? Corbin look I'm trying to make inroads into this College, trying to build a future for 
myself and make new friends, not just go to class and collect grades." Sharon's face was blushing a bit 
with emotion as she delved right into the matter at hand.

"I have sports." I wrinkled I brow at the insult and gave a shrug.

"Just gymnastics!" Sharon waved a hand in the air as a quick dismissal.

"And Soccer." I raised an eyebrow.

"Soccer?" Sharon repeated dumbfounded, "What about gymnastics? Where the fuck did Soccer come 
from?" she asked with concern.

"Well, I've been playing with some of the girls on the field, you know just messing around, and it turned 
out I'm a little quicker then some of the ones who have been doing it for years. And my strength seems to 
give me an advantage also, and I have more endurance then allot of them too, which is strange because of 
the amount of running on the field, but I don't think they really take care of themselves as well I do. So, I 
guess that's why I'm in better shape."

"So just like that! They are going to let you be on the team? And what about your gymnastics!"

"In case you haven't noticed, the past few years have been allot tougher then you realize Sharon, I've 
grown taller and filled out. It's gotten allot harder on my body and joints to perform all of those routines, 
I just can't keep up with those freaky little girls flipping and flying thru the air, well not freaky, but their 
smaller frame size is tough to compete against. I've become a burden to the team in so many words."

"We'll you're just naturally muscular, maybe if you went on a strict diet to get thinner, did you think 
about that?" Sharon spoke as I watched her stab her salad with a fork.

"A strict diet?" I almost spit my food out of my mouth, "I'm like five-foot-eleven as it is Sharon! I'm an 
Amazon compared to most girl's, especially those on my gymnastics team. Anyway I'm not going to 
torture myself with diets, it just won't work and as for getting on the Soccer Team, I'll have to wait for 
tryouts."

"Can we change the subject!" I leaned across the table.

"Yeah, we need to, so let's get back to the matter at hand." Sharon sipped on her glass of water.

"Forget it." I said in a firm voice.

"Forget what?" Sharon looked up.

"I am not apologizing, because I know this is where you are going. Also, You've been acting like a really 
big ASS and it's starting to piss me off!" Damn I was in rare form this morning, and why not, Sharon was 
getting mouthy around me lately and she needed to be put in her place.

In response to my outburst my friend sat in silence, more like shocked silence, as Sharon tended to get 
quiet when I would really get mad. Her lips tensed as she sat back in her booth and began to fidget with 
the napkin. Her eyes got a little teary as her hand nervously picked her fork up played some more with 
the salad. 

"I'm sorry." Sharon finally said and her look turned soft and emotional. 

But I would have none of it, my temper was starting to boil and I was fed up, "You can shove your 'sorry'!" 
and I quickly looked down at my purse, sitting off to my right all the while my heart pounded in my 
chest. My jaw flexed as I reached in withdrawing my share of the lunch and threw some cash on the table.

"I've got it!" Sharon quipped as also grabbed her purse.

"Whatever." I said and slid out of the both to stand up and leave.

"Wait, where are you going?" Sharon fumbled now for her purse and looked up in shock.

"I'm not going to sit around and argue, banter, whatever! No thank you, you've wasted enough of my 
morning already!" I quickly walked down the row of booths, several male students pausing and watching 
as we walked by.

"I said I was sorry!" Sharon called out after me.

I glared over my shoulder and shot back, "So what!" as if the apology didn't make anything better. I 
stepped out into the sidewalk in front of the caf‚ turned to my right and started walking back towards 
campus, a cool wind caught me head on and it felt good as I took a deep breath.

"Corbin! Wait!" I heard Sharon call out, and a couple of seconds later the brunette was at my side, "I can't 
believe you just walked out like that!" Sharon huffed.

"You see me walking don't you? I'm not going to argue with you Sharon, I'm sick of it, and all your blah, 
blah, blah, bullshit!"

"Don't say that, I hate it when you do that! And besides, I don't want to argue either!" She pleaded. 

I suddenly stopped and pointed right into Sharon's face, causing her to stop abruptly with a look of 
shock, "I'm not going to be insulted or blamed for any of this, nor do I want to listen to your belittling 
backhanded apologies!" and then started walking away again. For you folks that don't understand the 
importance of this conversation, let me try to explain, this is typical of the little petty power-play thing 
going on between us, and it felt good to have Sharon groveling for my attention and forgiveness. We both 
had strong personalities in certain areas, but that is what forged our love-hate relationship with one 
another. 

"I'm sorry, okay, look will you stop!" Sharon tugged on the back of my shirt. Finally, I started to slow 
down and looked around silently pointing to a small common area with a bench to sit on. We quietly 
walked over to have a seat, a large oak provided some shade from the bright sun. Sharon collected her 
thoughts, "I really mean it, I am sorry, okay? Oh god," Sharon leaned forward and cradled her face into 
her hands, she took a deep breath and sat back against the bench, "I wish I could take it all back, I was 
just being mean bitch, okay?" Sharon placed her left arm on top of the backrest before speaking, "Gheesh 
this is as bad as any boyfriend, with all the female baggage as well." Sharon moaned. I had to fight off a 
smile at that last comment, Sharon's left hand then stretched out, over the back of the bench and gently 
stroked my bicep. I glanced down at the touch and sighed, it was soothing and amazingly allot of my 
hostility seemed to evaporate with one simple physical act.

I sat up and leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees, Sharon began to rub and pat my back, "I 
know school and everything has been stressful for you." Sharon leaned closer in, "But I shouldn't have 
been so rude during lunch, I've been really mean, I'm sorry." 

This was a big deal for Sharon as I watched her, at least in my own mind it was. Sharon had burned thru 
more friendships in her life because of that take-charge, 'fuck you', bitchy attitude. Yet I felt some sense 
of urgency now on her part, wanting to nurture our friendship, it felt good to see her make so much 
effort. 

My eyes drifted idly over the long blades of green grass around my sandals, "I'm sorry too." I reached over 
with my right hand placed and placed it on Sharon's bare left knee.

"We'll good, I'm glad that's settled!" Sharon straightened and smiled, "And we both agree I was right and 
you were wrong." 

We both laughed at that comment. Sharon stood up and adjusted her purse over her shoulder, "Let me 
know when your trying out for practice, I'll come watch and cheer you on!" Sharon pumped her left hand 
in the air and kicked her left foot out in a little impromptu Cheer salute.

(Good grief that conversation was painful, now you know why I don't always dump my thoughts at 
Sharon's doorstep, she loves to talk...talk and talk some more! Anyway, things seem to be going better for 
me right? Well you just wait. Oh, and if you've guessed by now that I sound naive back in High School 
and College, well bingo you win a door prize, I was very naive. But that has all changed over the years.)

**********

My exterior aloofness often led people to believe I was arrogant, uncaring and in some cases hostile. That 
'persona' did in fact grow exponentially after the frat party 'incident'. (How could anyone have this 
perception of me? What the hell is wrong with you people! All of you obviously need a good knuckle 
sandwich if that is what you think! I'm really so lovable and sweet!)

Steve, the recipient of my elbow, had only seen me once in the week that followed and that was at a 
distance. Initially he was infuriated, but that lasted for maybe another twenty-four hours until an odd 
sense of respect and attraction must have taken hold of him as he actually tried asking me out on a date. I 
declined of course, but I guess he knew of so few girls that had such nerve to punch, or in this case 
'elbow' another person that it definitely made me stand out, which I don't know if that is necessarily a 
good thing. I guess I also seemed unapproachable now and for Steve as well as most other guys, that 
unattainable quality was what 'the chase' is all about.

That one incident on such a big campus did spread and to the chagrin of a great many of the girl's on 
campus the men now spoke of me in the highest regards as if they admired me. It seemed to totally 
dumbfound many of the women that I was suddenly elevated to this sexy Amazon status when all of the 
men present had initially riled against my violent reaction. Regardless many of the women could care less 
who I was, athletically or academically, or what I had done, the real issue at hand was how I was stealing 
a lot of their thunder and/or spotlight. But not all the girl's aligned them selves against me, I had friends 
on the Gymnastic and Soccer team, and while they teased me to some extent most of them showed 
support.

But what am I going to do? Go around and beat everyone up? That would get me thrown right out of 
school for sure. 

I needed a release more than ever and I hoped the weight room just might give me that. I swiped my ID 
card thru the reader and the door to the gym unlocked. It was an impressive facility indeed and upon 
hearing the clanging of metal I immediately followed the noise. Coming around the corner I was 
confronted by a large workout room filled with free weights and other machines, the likes my high school 
never had. The groups of guys and a very few girls seemed to pause and stare at me as I looked wide eyed 
at everything in the room. One guy walked past me from the nearby water fountain, "Hello" he said 
casually and attempted to engage my stare, "Hi" I said barely above a whisper as my eyes stayed more 
focused on the lavish amount of equipment that was available. I sneered in disgust as I observed the usual 
crowd of folks that pretended to be exercising, doing more lounging then anything. Those people piss me 
off!

Meanwhile Sharon continued to take to school life like a bird to the air, she was successfully pledging her 
Sorority and was now on the Duke Cheerleading Squad. While Sharon appreciated my support, she also 
knew that I thought Sororities and Fraternities were stupid and childish. 

Sharon being my dorm-mate and closest friend, became inundated with questions about me, to which 
Sharon did her best to deflect, such as; 'Why does Corbin act to aloof? Why is she so distant? Is Corbin 
really stuck up?', to which Sharon would half-heatedly reply 'No it just takes time to get to know her'. 
Sharon and I were definitely an odd couple for sure; Sharon with her high profile, high society, and 
wealthy family background. Compared to my low profile, humble beginnings (actually, not so humble, 
but my family history is off limits for now, maybe I'll open up more about it later).

The thing about life is this, you get over one hurdle and you're suddenly confronted by another, but I 
wouldn't call what happened next a hurdle at all, it was more like 'life-altering' (Can't I have any down 
time? Work...work...work! That's all I ever seem to do!) 

But back to my 'life-altering' moment, I walked into the Girl's locker room to officially practice with the 
entire squad, I had major butterflies and scanned the room to pick out anyone I had not met, only a 
couple of faces seemed unfamiliar as my eyes scanned from right to left. You readers can mock and laugh 
all you want at this next statement but when my vision locked onto the last person to my left, that's when 
I saw *her*, and when she looked up at me our eyes became fixated and I got this jolt, like being startled. 
I finally remembered to smile and for the first time in my life I was looking at another girl and thinking 
'Oh my god, she's beautiful, I MUST meet her.' I've never had that feeling about anyone, my insides got 
warm and I was suddenly nervous as I walked in her general direction as if my body was being guided 
under it's own power.

"This locker is free." Her voice was so soft as it called out to me, as beautiful fingers pointed to the one 
right next to hers.

"Okay." I said and stepped over the bench, resting my gym bag.

"I'm Nikki." 

"I'm Corbin." I gushed like some fool girl gone ga-ga and I abruptly shook her hand. But I notice she's not 
so smooth and calm anymore, she was at first, but now she's tilting her head down and away and her 
cheeks become a tad blushed. We're both acting a bit goofy, trying to break the ice with one another.

"I heard a new girl was joining the team, you must be her." Nikki said.

"I am her."

"I hear you're pretty good." Nikki says and closes her locker.

I am struggling to concentrate on what she is saying, her hair is so black, and pupils are so dark and 
exotic, I am getting lost in them. She is definitely foreign, maybe Spanish or Brazilian? Oh Good grief it's 
like I look at this girl and I hear angels singing and music playing and all sorts of romantic thoughts are 
tumbling from my brain into every part of my body. This is madness!!

"Thanks, that's nice of you to say." I finally respond to kind comment, yet my primary focus is studying 
this exotic beauty, with her dark olive complexion, skin so smooth, and her body was so toned and 
athletic. Again those eyes, those big dark eyes, like two black opals that were calm yet so direct that I felt 
like I didn't have a private thought around her. We were instant friends, we both wanted to be around 
one another and seemed to gravitate to one another, it was awkward at first, we both felt the same 
attraction but played it off as a soul mates from some prior life!

Nikki was also smart and was one of the first girls who didn't seem to judge me at all. She wasn't into 
weight lifting that much (could have fooled me with her muscle tone) but was 'Sporty' as Nikki liked to 
call herself, but still visited the University Gym frequently. This budding friendship would be the setup 
for a series of pit-falls in my friendship with Sharon as Nikki was fast becoming a substitute best-friend 
for me while Sharon became more and more involved in her social activities.

In the meantime, I handled my stress level by working my ass off academically and more importantly 
athletically. I made immediate progress in the weight room, something I had only just started in High 
School and both Nikki and I were amazed at how my body responded to weight lifting. Much to the 
dismay of the other women who entered the gym every guy that would walk by made a positive comment 
on my progress, while the glares of resentment continued to grow from the other women.

I had started to enjoy Nikki's company immensely, she also had a sense of responsibility to her academic 
studies like I did. Before I even knew it, in a very short period of time, I was in a genuine, sincere 
friendship we complimented each other in ways Sharon and I never were able to. Nik and I would just 
sometimes glance over at one another and smile, for no reason at all, it felt...well...simply beautiful.

Don't gag on me as I describe her, I know it's a bit much at times, but it's how I feel.

*********

"Those guys over at the bar, and that other table over there, have been staring at us." Nikki said as we sat 
out on the now enclosed balcony of one of out favorite restaurants. My head jerked to the left and 
scanned the room. 

"Don't look!" Nikki giggled.

"Oh sorry." I slumped in my chair and blushed red with a smile. I waved my glass of red wine, taking a 
hurried sip.

"No your just indiscrete when it comes to certain things." Nikki said with a smile but I knew she didn't 
mean it to be condescending or insulting. In fact Nikki seemed to be 'the' authority on manners, 
etiquette, and moved with effortless grace. More so then even Sharon, but then Sharon seemed to 
be a bit more pampered and feminine in her mannerisms.

"What?" I gawked at Nikki she was looking at me with this odd smile.

"One of those guys is coming over to our table." Nikki raised her left eyebrow with such discretion that 
had I not been staring right into her disarmingly dark eyes I would not of picked up on it.

"Damn." I mumbled and looked down at my lap I was just hoping for some time alone with my friend.

"Hello ladies." the guy said, "My name is John and wanted to invite you two to come over and have drinks 
on us."

"Hello John, my name is Nicole and this is my dear friend Corbin." Nikki extended her left hand out over 
the table towards me, as if introducing someone important.

"I've heard of you! You the girl that belted that guy at the party?" He chuckled trying to be lighthearted. 
However, I simply frowned and rolled my eyes.

"Yeah." I sighed and reached for my drink.

"You know John, that's an awfully nice invitation but we've ordered and would like to eat first. Then we'll 
chat." Nikki smiled and John, like most men when in the presence of two beautiful women, his brain had 
'checked out'. He hesitated for a second and then smiled at his awkward hesitation, "Yeah, sure that 
would be great, enjoy your dinner." and took a step back casting several looks back as he walked away. 
(That was only one of about four or five other offers we got from guys nearby to join their table, nice I 
suppose, but irritating in many ways.)

"Oh, he likes you." Nikki discreetly pointed her finger in my direction.

"How could you tell, I never made eye contact with him." I sighed.

"Well, as he walked away he definitely was checking you out." and Nikki smiled at my bashfulness as I 
turned my head away and adjusted my hair like some silly school girl. I could feel Nikki studying me, 
maybe waiting for me to say something; "You're gorgeous Corbin and you don't even know the effect you 
have over men and..." Nikki hesitated "...women."

"I'm sorry, such talk makes you extremely uncomfortable, I could see that the first time we met." Nikki 
sipped on her wine.

I folded my napkin a few times in a nervous gesture and shrugged, still looking down at my lap. "I don't 
know why, I'm just very uncomfortable with being viewed as a sexual object." Then my whole body 
jumped a little when I felt Nikki's foot touch me on the calf. Nikki was smiling, I think she just wanted to 
get my attention. "Its okay Corbin just be yourself around me. We don't have to talk to those guys." and 
immediately a sense of relief seemed to come over me as I finally relaxed with a smile.

"Thanks Nic, I get so stressed out, I'm terrible at making small talk." I perked up when the waiter came 
over with our meals. "So, uhm, which one was looking at me?" I meekly asked and glanced over to where 
the guys were gathered, playing darts and drinking beer. Nikki let go with a quick burst of laughter at 
how I was now showing signs of interest. By now, a few other girls had joined the guys in their round of 
dart playing, a couple cut unwelcome eyesin my and Nikki's direction. 

Nikki smiled at me and let out a sigh, "I think the hardest part for you is just accepting yourself, stop 
trying to overcome your bashfulness like it's something bad, like it's some flaw in your personality. It's 
actually one of the best traits about you Corbin, it's part of your strength, and when you embrace that as 
a welcome characteristic then eventually everything else will start to fall into place and feel comfortable." 

Wow that comment really hit close to home and I have to admit it shook me up emotionally, "Nikki, if 
you only knew how good it made me feel to hear you say that no one except maybe my mom has ever 
encouraged me to be content with that part of myself." and my jaw and fist flexed with greater effort, as if 
my mood had switched more to being angry. I didn't jump this time but a shiver went up my spine as 
Nikki stroked the back of my bare calf, exposed by my knee length skirt. It was an attempt to sooth my 
nerves and it was working. 

"Mmmmmm..." Nikki sighed.

"What?" I asked, feeling better as Nikki gently brushed her leg against mine, it didn't feel awkward or 
sexual at all, but soothing...calming...what Nikki was doing.

"I'd hate to get on your bad side Corbin."

"Puuhhhhlleease" I groaned, "I'm a pussycat, harmless." I blushed with a shrug.

"You ready?" Nikki looked up as we split the tip.

"Yep!" I looked to where the guys were still hanging about.

"That's up to you." Nikki paused as she was about to stand.

"I guess." I nervously said as my heart fluttered but Nikki just gave me a worry free smile. Taking a deep 
breath I collected my purse and turned, Nikki was already a couple of steps ahead. I watched they're eyes 
collectively turn to watch our approach. Good grief what a site, the half dozen guys had started jostling 
for position, all but forgetting about their current female company, something that sparked outrage in at 
least two of the girls present.

"Hey Nikki." A couple of them spoke up.

"Hey Rob, Dave..." She smiled, "...this is my friend Corbin." 

I simply raised my hand and gave a little wave of acknowledgment.

"Why don't you join us?" John quickly interjected and scurried about collecting some extra chairs. 
Already I was inundated with at least three guys who were all trying to engage me in conversation, quite 
honestly it was exhausting to try and keep up with them all and before I knew it a glass of beer was next 
to me. Uncharacteristically I took the offered drink, thinking I needed the alcohol to unwind anyway.

"Careful, the brute might sock you if you get too close." A girl's voice rose up from behind several of the 
guys causing an uncomfortable moment.

"What? Was that directed at me?" I stood up nervously and looked around. 

"Duh!" A girl said and slipped thru two of the guys, making a goofy dumb expression at me, meant 
obviously to mock me. It was Tiffany and she was pissed at having Nikki and I show up, basically 
manipulating every guy's attention away from her and her friends.

"Put a cork in it." One guy said in reference to Tiffany's insult.

"You put a cork in it what do you guys see in this muscle head jock anyway?" The brunette scowled me up 
and down. I took a step forward but Nikki's left hand gripped my right wrist with a gentle squeeze and I 
stopped, checking my state of mind realizing that I was about to deck the girl. I was a little dismayed that 
I was about to loose control so quickly and why did I want to immediately lash out? 'Get a grip' I told 
myself.

"Come 'on! What are you waiting for, do we need to step outside?" Tiffany spat looking me up and down 
with the best disdain and disgust she could muster. Sure I was taller and stronger then this girl, but she 
seemed determined to make a stand. I guess in her mind she had her own pride to look out for even if it 
meant getting the crap beat out of her, and then again, maybe she could take care of herself?

I swallowed hard and looked away as Nikki gripped my right hand that was down between our bodies. I 
decided to remain standing, I had swallowed my pride some but felt that it would look 'cowardly' to sit 
down, at least in my own mind it did. Worse still most of the guys were facially showing some 
disheartening looks that I wasn't 'stepping up'.

"Tiffany what the hell is your problem? You're just being bitchy." John griped. That was all the distraction 
that I needed, apparently Tiffany turned her venom on John next with his criticism as the two argued, but 
that died down too as Tiffany's friends managed to calm her down. I nursed my drink a little and actually 
accepted another, even relaxing enough to play a round of darts. Simply put, I decided to keep my 
distance from the other girl's, but it suddenly seemed that I went from fending off the hostility of other 
women to fending off the sexual advances of the guys who began probing my personal life.

I wondered where Nikki had gone and then my drowsy eyes found her, she was going thru the same 
routine as me, fending off the guys. We gave each other a smile of support but the stare and smile 
between us lingered a bit and then the thought of kissing came to the forefront of my brain, which scared 
the hell out of me, because I was thinking of Nikki! Her full, sensual lips, and a body that oozed sexuality, 
she had to be sexually active with her boyfriend, she just had to be! And that caused an odd jealous pain 
to rip thru me.

"There's Dale, let's go chat him up." came Tiffany's annoying voice and it totally disrupted my mood as I 
looked up blinking my eyes. My eyes followed Tiffany and her two friends as they made a straight line to 
where a few guys from the football team had just entered the bar.

"What's the fuss?" I sighed. 

"Oh, Dale, the new football 'star' of the week he's a big deal right now, it's been all over the news about 
his stats and going pro in a couple of years." I squinted trying to clear the alcoholic haze from my eyes 
and mind, the smoke and late hour had also taken a toll. 'Wow' I thought to myself Dale was very 
handsome and tall looking very well built under his clothes and well dressed. I just smirked at how allot 
of the girl's were throwing themselves at him and I looked down at my almost empty glass and now 
understood why I didn't like this whole social scene, 'much too complex'. I looked up and felt that 
awkwardness return but over and over it felt like Dale's gaze kept returning to me, trying to engage me. 
Yeah right! I'm imagining things again first thoughts of kissing Nikki, now this, guess my judgment must 
be impaired, 'I've had about enough of this.' I sighed to myself and set the beer down.

"Nikki can we?" I asked as I walked up behind her my head nodding towards the exit. 

"Sure thing." Nikki smiled and said her goodbyes as we left, no hesitation at all, she was happy to leave 
with me. Several guys tried, tried very hard, to pursued us otherwise but we just kept moving to the exit.

That night was what I refer to as the first 'close call' between Nik and I as we walked back to my dorm 
room from the bar, we were both pretty drunk, laughing and giggling all the way down the sidewalk as we 
tried to keep the other steady. I wrapped my right arm around her shoulder and leaned in telling her I 
was so glad that I met her and kissed her on the cheek. 

"Thank you." She said quietly as her head lowered as if she was contemplating something when my hand 
dropped to my side I didn't think anything of the fact that her left hand then grabbed my right and we 
held hands the remainder of the walk back.

"Come on up." I said smiling.

"Okay." Nikki smiled back.

Sharon wasn't there and I didn't expect her back she was spending most nights at the Sorority House 
now. I took off my earrings and shoes, Nikki did the same and when I turned around she raised her arms 
toward me and I just smiled walking into her hug. The hug lasted awhile but I was so buzzed that I really 
didn't think anything of it. I remember lying down on my bed and falling asleep in each other's arms, we 
played it off as both of us being affectionate in a friendly sort of way. We both confessed to the other that 
neither had a friendship with another girl that crossed so many physical barriers.
