I AM NOT ASHAMED 20

THE MEGUMI STORIES
BY MEGUMI KATO AND FRIENDS

VOLUME 03: I AM NOT ASHAMED
BY KIMIKO KOBAYASHI AND MEGUMI KATO

CHAPTER XX

The Beginning

Gently the tray was removed, its silver chains 
unclipped from my high collar and the handles 
withdrawn from my numb fingers. The straps holding my 
legs together were undone, and the two girls supported 
me as I stepped stiffly down from my little platform. 
I wanted so much to thank them, and my Master, for all 
they had done but they chose not to remove my gag. One 
of the Filipinas brought a tray of damp cloths and 
Tomoko carefully wiped the love-juice from between my 
legs while Shizue gently patted away the sweat which 
had accumulated on my face and breasts. My elbows were 
still agonisingly pinioned behind my back, and they 
tied one end of a long rope to the links joining the 
cuffs. At the last moment my Master unscrewed the 
beautiful clamps and their tinkling bells from my 
breasts, and I noticed him slip them into his jacket 
pocket: he was planning to use them again during the 
evening, then, but would he use them on me? 

There was friendly applause as I entered the main 
room, Shizue and Tomoko leading me by my rope. Whereas 
last week I had been under Test, they knew me now and 
were glad that I was joining them. Many of my new 
friends were stripped and ready for action, although 
some of the girls were still in their delightfully 
provocative and revealing dresses. But my attention 
was fixed on the structure awaiting me at the end of 
the room. 

It was a black-painted metal framework a little less 
tall than my own height in my black high-heeled boots, 
with horizontal bars at top and bottom to which my 
hands and feet could be tied. Across the middle was a 
broad strip which was comfortably padded. As the two 
girls brought me to stand up against it, facing 
forward, the padded area extended from just above my 
crotch to just below my breasts. I was ordered to 
stand with my feet apart, and short ropes soon bound 
my ankles to the lower bar. At last the cruel cuffs 
holding my elbows together were unlocked, and in the 
rush of pleasure from my shoulder muscles as the 
tension was released I was glad to let my wrists be 
roped to the upper bar, stretched as widely apart as 
they comfortably could be. I hoped someone was taking 
photographs: stretched out like that helplessly in my 
tight, tight corset and my long boots and gloves I 
must have looked charmingly erotic. 

Shizue turned to the expectant audience and made a 
short speech telling them what they already knew: how 
she and Tomoko had spotted my potential as a 
submissive, and had persuaded the others to let me be 
subjected to three Tests; and how the last had been 
the usual examination of candidates which I had easily 
passed the previous week. I was more interested in 
what was happening to the frame to which I was 
securely bound: the upper part was slowly leaning 
forwards, taking me with it, so that I was soon bent 
over the apparatus as it took on something like the 
shape of the "horse" over which children jump in a 
school gymnasium. My bottom was now the highest part 
of me; only a padded framework held my head up and 
prevented me from letting it droop over the far side. 

"And now we all know what Kimiko's main sexual 
interests are," Shizue was saying laboriously. She 
seemed to be one of those unfortunate people who 
cannot stop themselves going on too long when invited 
to speak in public. "And anyone who _doesn't_ know has 
only to look at the little tattoos at the tops of her 
thighs!" 

My legs were widely spread, held taut and straight in 
their tight high-heeled boots by the frame to which I 
was fixed. Those standing near me on that side bent 
down to examine my shamelessly displayed crotch, and 
told each other how pretty my tattooed rope and whip 
were. Shizue seemed to have finished her prepared talk 
by now, and was inviting everyone to make use of me in 
my helplessness. 

Meanwhile Tomoko had been at work preparing me 
further. At last she removed the gag from my mouth. I 
swallowed the accumulated saliva carefully, and worked 
my jaw muscles. They were stiff, but - a naughty 
thought occurred to me - were about to receive the 
best lubricant a girl could have. Tomoko was now 
kneeling under the framework, attaching little metal 
clips to my breasts; and then reached between my legs 
and fixed another tiny one to my clitoris. They were 
the merest pinpricks compared with the wonderful 
clamps which had tortured me so gloriously for the 
last couple of hours; but there were wires attached to 
the clips and I guessed they would soon deliver more 
sensation than that. To my surprise Tomoko then 
attached a little microphone to the framework near my 
face. 

"Are you planning to record my screams?" I asked 
quietly. 

"Well, yes - for the soundtrack on the video," she 
replied, "but that's not all. Watch!" 

She suddenly clapped her hands twice, and then once 
again, in front of the microphone. Bursts of delicious 
electrical tingling tickled my breasts and cunt. 

"Say something," she commanded in a louder voice. 

"Oh, this is so lovely ..." I responded. 

Again the sound was matched by the rise and fall of 
the sensation in my breasts and clitoris. I guessed 
the clever device was adapted from the amplifier used 
in a disco to make the lighting pulsate in line with 
the volume of the music. 

"You see, you always promise you _won't_ scream, 
however much you are hurt," said Tomoko in a softer 
voice, "but now I think you'll want to scream as loud 
as you can! The more you scream, the more it will 
torture you - and the more it tortures you, the more 
you will scream. And there's _nothing_ you can do to 
stop it. Isn't that _lovely_?"

She gave me a little kiss, then left me to my fate. 

I had decided, thinking things over in my lonely 
helplessness on my little platform, that my original 
idea for this part of the evening would not work. I 
had imagined offering myself for pleasure by those who 
had enjoyed my presentation, and for punishment by 
those who were dissatisfied. But of course the 
punishment would be as enjoyable as the pleasure - for 
me and for those using me too, I hoped. And what was 
the point, I now asked myself, of trying to be perfect 
in my presentation if the result was to deprive myself 
of one of my greatest pleasures? One man, Emi's 
friend, had already undertaken to punish me and I was 
looking forward to it quite dreadfully. 

So what could I do except look imploringly up at all 
the people standing round me and say, "Oh, please do 
everything you want! _Everything_!" 

My Master was the first to take me, thrusting his 
enormous erection at my face and making the framework 
rise a little to allow for his height. The apparatus 
held my head at exactly the angle for his cock to pass 
smoothly through my mouth and down my throat, though 
the tight black collar round my neck produced a little 
extra constriction which I sensed he enjoyed. With my 
mouth so stuffed and my body still so tightly bound by 
the lovely black corset, I found breathing difficult 
but soon established a rhythm of short shallow breaths 
through my nose. As I could not move my head, my 
Master thrust in and out with his hips, fucking my 
face vigorously till my mouth was flooded with the 
familiar taste of his cum. I swallowed it joyfully and 
thanked him for using me so well. 

The others had left my Master in sole possession of me 
for the first fuck of the evening but now began to use 
me relentlessly at both ends, pushing each other out 
of the way in their excitement. Some of those who 
wanted my mouth pulled out at the last moment and 
spattered their cum over my face: unable to do 
anything else, I just let it hang there, my sluttish 
appearance providing an added stimulus. My foolish 
idea of being punished at one end and pleasured at the 
other vanished completely as everything that was done 
to me merged into endless delight. Even a few girls 
joined in: there is a scene in the video of that 
night, showing a cock firmly plugged into my arse and 
a couple of giggling girls competing to present their 
pretty bottoms and cunts to my mouth, which I watch 
repeatedly as one of the most erotic images of myself 
that I know. But the loveliest experience was 
something I had often dreamed of but never achieved in 
reality: one man fucking my mouth while another 
whipped my arse - a combination of different pleasures 
whose power almost overwhelmed me. I begged my lovers 
to keep it up endlessly, the man with the whip taking 
over my mouth as soon as it was free while the next in 
line stimulated his lust and mine with further cruel 
strokes on my quivering, red-hot bottom. 

At last it was over, for a while at least. I had lost 
count of course, but every man who wanted me must have 
used me at least twice; and it would have been greedy 
to expect more. Other girls were longing to be fucked 
too, and some men chose to use the sight of my 
helpless submission as a visual stimulus to sex with 
other partners. 

As I lay gasping over my frame, my bottom still 
beautifully positioned for anyone who wanted to use 
it, I realised Tomoko was kneeling in front of me 
again, gently wiping the cum and sweat from my face. 

"How are you feeling, Kimiko?" she asked. 

"Wonderful," I croaked, the cum I had swallowed 
clogging my throat. "Have they finished? Oh, _please_ 
don't say they've had enough!" 

"No, no; it will start again soon. But it will be 
different, and very lovely for you I think. Just rest 
a little now." 

The electric tingling unleashed by our voices in the 
microphone stopped. I must have dozed off for a few 
minutes, as the next thing I was conscious of was a 
soft but erotic rustling and tinkling sound. I opened 
my eyes and saw a man crouched in front of me. I 
focussed on him and recognised the _gaijin_, little 
Emi's friend. 

"Hello there, Kimiko," he said softly. "Are you ready 
for your punishment yet?" 

"Oh, yes please!" 

"I'm going to start with this." 

He swished the instrument he was holding from side to 
side, and I saw that it was a cat-o'-nine-tails. 

"But Emi-san said you would use a cane," I objected. 

"All in good time, little one. You must work up to 
that. But now you will enjoy this." 

I looked closer and saw that the long slim lashes were 
tightly knotted, and decorated with little specks of 
shiny metal. It was they that had produced the 
tinkling sound. It looked a lovely cat, but I was 
still uncertain. 

"Will it leave marks?" I asked anxiously. 

"Oh, yes. For a few days. You'll have to hide them 
from your mother somehow." He grinned cheerfully. "But 
it will be worth it. Come, are you ready?" 

"Please." 

"But before I start I have another little toy for you 
to enjoy. Look." 

He was dangling before my eyes a pair of small hooks 
in black metal. They were joined together and attached 
to a thin black cord. 

"No, I don't suppose you know what it is," he 
continued. "It has only recently come back into 
fashion among people like us. It will force you to 
hold your head up so that your admirers can enjoy 
watching your face as I whip you." 

"How does it ..." I began to ask, but could not find 
my voice. 

"It's a little nose bondage device," he said: "and it 
works like this." 

Quickly he slipped the two hooks into my nostrils, 
taking the cord up over my forehead and down my back. 
I could feel him loop it into the top fastening of my 
corset. 

"Ready?" he asked; but without waiting for an answer 
tightened the cord, pulling up my head till my chin no 
longer rested on the padded shelf and I looked frankly 
up at the faces of the people surrounding me. The 
pressure of the hooks inside my nose was 
uncomfortable, and my neck and shoulder muscles 
screamed in pain, but I could bear it. 

When he stood in front of me again I could see him 
clearly at last. He was bare-chested but wearing black 
trousers. There was no sign of an erection through the 
cloth. This man, I thought, will whip and cane me with 
clinical precision, not just to stimulate his own 
desire. A great feeling of contentment flooded through 
me as I prepared to submit to a professional. He moved 
out of my sight, the ends of the cat dragging sexily 
along the carpet behind him. I felt his gentle hands 
on my bottom. 

"Look at this sweet, plump arse!" I heard him say to 
the others. "Perfect for the whip. I have shown her 
the instrument, and she has consented to it. Can 
everyone see?" 

There was a short pause, then I felt his left hand, 
resting lightly on the shiny black cloth of my corset, 
change position as he hefted the cat in his right. I 
held my breath - and suddenly it came: the nine lashes 
with their hard knots and metal points hurtling down 
onto my bottom. It was like being plunged into black 
night, but a night illuminated by the most brilliant 
firework-display. Of course there was almost no sound, 
but it felt as if a series of explosions had gone off 
all over my body. I screamed with anguished delight; 
of course I had not been able to make much noise while 
my mouth had been stuffed with cock after cock, and I 
had almost forgotten the ingenious sound-driven device 
attached to my breasts and clitoris, so the electric 
tingling which surged through my body added 
unexpectedly to my joy. 

"More, more! Oh, harder!" I begged. 

"Take it easy, little one! This is just the beginning. 
And don't be greedy: I whip slowly, so you can enjoy 
each stroke. You _are_ enjoying it, aren't you?" 

Without waiting for an answer he brought the cat down 
again, subtly varying the angle of stroke so that the 
pleasure was concentrated on my lower bottom. Then it 
was the turn of my upper thighs, the flesh exposed at 
the top of my tight boots; with my legs bound wide 
apart the long lashes could snake and curl round each 
thigh separately, tormenting the sensitive skin of my 
crotch. I screamed and begged for mercy, hoping - 
knowing - that he would understand that I wanted no 
such thing. The electrical charge tormenting my 
nipples and clitoris rose and fell in sympathy with my 
screams. What was it Tomoko had said about this 
wonderfully sadistic piece of equipment? "The more you 
scream, the more it will torture you - and the more it 
tortures you, the more you will scream." Oh ... oh ... 
_yes_ ... 

I was incoherent now: sobbing, screaming and begging 
with no thought other than that this heavenly 
experience should last for ever. But alas it did not. 
After another dozen or so lashes, there was a pause. 
Then suddenly one last stroke, skilfully covering the 
whole of my bottom. Then nothing. 

"Oh, _why_ have you stopped?" I gasped when I at last 
had my breath back. 

"Because you are too greedy, little one," I heard him 
say. "You will appreciate it much more if you learn to 
enjoy it in stages. I will take you up with me; then I 
will bring you down again. Only when I think you are 
truly ready will I let you experience final ecstasy." 

"I am ready!" 

"That is for me to decide." 

I felt his hands softly stroking my bottom, and heard 
his voice explaining to the audience how sudden 
contrasts between violent pain and delicate 
manipulation would give me even greater pleasure than 
a simple crescendo of agony. I had to admit he was 
right. The stroking stopped, and I was aware of my 
lover kneeling before my face again. This time he was 
holding a selection of canes and rods. 

"I promised to cane you, little one, and now I shall. 
In a few minutes. But I have many canes, and it is 
important that you should agree with my choice. This 
big thick one will give you great excitement, but 
maybe he is too rough and brutal for your pretty 
bottom. I think perhaps this very narrow cane would be 
right for you: he is whippy and flexible, and so very 
sharp! Oh yes, I believe you will love him!" He 
slashed the cane through the air a few times. "Let me 
show you. Emi-chan, come here a moment," he called to 
one side. 

Emi joined him at once. She had abandoned her pretty 
open-front dress and was fully naked now. He rose, 
leaving the cane on the carpet, and slipped his right 
arm over her shoulders. She smiled unsuspectingly up 
at him. Suddenly he twisted her round so that she was 
doubled over, gripped her round the waist with his 
left, picked up the cane and flicked it several times 
rapidly over her plump buttocks. While Emi screamed 
and gasped at this unexpected caress, he showed me how 
each switch of the cane had burnt a line almost as 
narrow as a hair into her flesh, white at first then 
changing rapidly to a red so bright it was almost as 
if his cane had drawn blood. 

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" he asked, as Emi 
scrambled off to rejoin her envious friends, her hands 
tenderly stroking the lovely decorations on her fiery 
bottom. 

Without waiting for an answer, he walked to the other 
side of the frame to which I was fastened. I felt his 
hands on my waist, tightening even further the straps 
of my beautiful corset. Could a girl stand being so 
painfully constricted, would I not be snapped in half 
by this incredible remodelling of my body? But then 
everything else was obliterated as the first stroke 
of - oh, _so_ many! - came sizzling down onto my arse. 
Of course David had caned me well as I lay bound and 
blindfolded on a hotel bed in Kyoto, but that was only 
his thoughtful introduction of me to such pleasures. 
My Master had flicked me with his riding crop as he 
fucked me, but that was only to add spice to our 
love-making. Nothing had prepared me for the ecstatic 
experience I was now being granted. The whipping with 
the cat had so sensitised my skin that from the very 
first stroke of the cane my body was flooded with 
pleasure. The reality of a room full of people, of a 
particular man slicing into my bottom with a 
particular slender length of leather-sheathed wood, 
vanished and I was left alone, face-to-face with my 
own sexuality. 

I saw myself, fixed in beautiful submission to the 
frame. It seemed a long way away, and yet I could see 
every detail sharply. Was it an inward vision or some 
version of reality? I opened and shut my eyes a few 
times but it seemed to make no difference. The girl 
down there - I myself, so beautiful in my sexy black 
costume, my tiny waist emphasising the voluptuous 
curves of my arse - seemed to have fainted and I could 
tell somehow, perhaps from their gestures, that my 
friends were worried for me as my lover continued to 
cane me relentlessly. But he was right, and I wanted 
somehow to tell them so. His strokes were keeping me 
aloft in this new world I was discovering, just as 
skilful twitches on the string will keep a kite flying 
high above the wind ... the pain he was giving me was 
the thread which kept me tethered to the pretty 
suffering girl down there. 

She seemed such a long way down! I was flying - 
swimming - through a world of golden light, 
luxuriating in my freedom as I twisted and floated. 
Were there other people here or was I alone in my own 
private paradise? I was in no hurry to find out: now 
that I had discovered this place and how to get there, 
I would be back. As often as possible. No wonder, if 
what Emi had said was true, girls made special 
appointments to be caned and liberated into ecstasy by 
this wonderful man. 

I had been flying face up towards the golden light. 
When I turned again, the room and the people and the 
girl had vanished. I could see below me a beautiful 
landscape - green fields, blue lakes, white mountains 
- like the pictures I had seen and built fantasies 
around as a child. What would it be like to land 
there? Was it real, or just something I had built out 
of forgotten memories? Could I - should I - break the 
thread that tethered me to my previous life? 

One day, perhaps. I would come here often, as often as 
I could find a lover able to give me the powerful 
sensations which turned the key in the lock. But my 
old world still had so much to offer! I was an 
accepted member of the Friday evening meetings now, 
and longed to learn everything my new friends had to 
teach me. Shizue had promised to introduce me to the 
Paradise Club, and I so looked forward to that. We, 
and Tomoko, would spend free afternoons in sexy 
clothes looking for pick-ups willing to pay for the 
privilege of pleasuring us. The _mama-san_ of the Pink 
Pussycat would always be glad to let me spend a lovely 
evening there as a nude hostess: oh, how nice that 
would be - to be _completely_ nude in front of 
everyone, admired, available! And if I wanted 
something a little sleazier the salons of Asakusa were 
waiting for me. I would find the little Filipina 
Melody and ask her to teach me all the things only 
girls know how to do to each other. And I must contact 
David again: I giggled at the thought that perhaps _I_ 
now had much to teach _him_! 

I began to feel the pull of the invisible thread. A 
whole new life was waiting for me. It seemed 
incredible that I had once been ashamed of my 
feelings. In the last few weeks I had confronted my 
sexuality and had decided I liked what I saw. More 
than that, I wanted everyone else to like it too. My 
friend Matsumoto-san had hinted that, if the video of 
tonight's performance was satisfactory, there might be 
work for me at the Marucho Film Company. The thought 
of a career as a nude model and fuck-film actress made 
me tremble with excitement. 

There were decisions to be made down there. Should I 
continue my job as an OL? When should I tell my family 
about my new life? Would they agree that there was 
nothing to be ashamed of in making the most of my 
enthusiastic sexuality and my desirable body? I felt 
my mother would understand, and she could talk my 
father round. Should I leave home and find myself a 
little apartment? Alone, or with a girlfriend who 
shared my tastes? 

The lovely new country I had discovered would always 
be waiting for me. I neither knew nor cared whether it 
had objective existence or was hidden somewhere inside 
myself. I knew the way now: I would be back. 

Meanwhile a new Kimiko - sensuous, sexually aware, 
self-confident - was waiting in the ordinary world to 
be breathed into life. Nothing would ever be the same 
again. Drawn by the invisible thread, I floated softly 
down to join her. 


END OF I AM NOT ASHAMED


[Coming Next: Volume 04 of the Megumi Stories: 
UNFINISHED AFFAIRS] 

For complete series so far see 
http://www.asstr.org/files/Authors/Bob_Williams
