What would happen if the Government gave you a whole new identity, except
that your daughter had to play the part of your wife?  They wouldn't do
that to a guy would they?  And if they played a trick on you in the
process, who could you complain to?  An attempt at a humorous look at an
impossible situation.
Codes: Mf mF slow 1st humor inc bro sis fath dau het orgy preg


=========================================================================

   Witness Protection Blues

   By Beating Off Bob (beatingoffbob@yahoo.com)

   Psst!  Hey you!  Yeah ...  over here.  C'mere.  You look like a decent
guy.  I gotta tell you something.

   NO!  Don't look around like you feel guilty.  Just come over here.  I
have to tell somebody about what's happened to me cause it's driving me
crazy.

   Yeah, just sit down, like we're chatting.  You're waiting for flight
802, right?  Yeah, me too.  It's been delayed getting in from Buffalo, so
we have a couple of hours to wait.

   No, I'm not selling anything.  I just have to get this off my chest.  It
won't take that long, and maybe you'll have some kind of idea about what I
should do.  Have you ever heard of the Witness Protection Program?  Yeah?
Well, I'm in it.

   NO!  Don't get freaked, I'm no criminal.  All I did was sort of keep
some books for this ...  um ...  organization ...  kind of on the side, you
know?  And they got in trouble with the law, and I testified against the
bosses.  But they owed some money ...  OK, a LOT of money to some people,
and those people are pissed at me because since I testified, they won't
ever see a dime of it.

   Yeah, I know I'm not supposed to tell anybody I'm in the program, but
you'll go your way, and I'll be on mine and we'll never see each other
again, and if I don't tell SOMEBODY I'm gonna just have a heart attack. 
Please?  All you have to do is listen.  Then, at least I'll know that
somebody else knows what they did to me.

   Who's "they"?  The Government ...  that's who.  It ain't right what they
did, but I can't do anything about it.

   See, it all started when my wife left, and I had to take care of my
three kids all by myself.  You got kids?  Yeah?  Well I got a son and two
daughters.  My boy's eighteen now, his name is ...  well, I'll just call
him Bobby, OK?  And then there's ...  Jill ...  yeah Jill and Lori.  Jill's
twenty and Lori's nineteen.  But this all started two and a half years ago,
when they were all still minors.

   Well, there I was, having to take care of them and on a bookkeeper's
salary.  It was tough, I'm telling you.  And then the boss suggested that
if I did a little creative bookkeeping I could make a LOT of money, three
times my regular pay, so I did it.  And it all went to shit.

   Anyway, they got caught, and I knew where the dead bodies were, so to
speak, so I cut a deal with Uncle Sam and they put me in the Witness
Protection Program.

   So that's when they gave us all new identities, right?  Yeah, that was
great ...  except for one thing.

   See, it turns out that when people are looking for you, like me for
instance, they're looking for a father and his son and two daughters,
right? So the Feds ...  they don't want to set us up that way.  Oh no. 
Instead they make my oldest daughter Jill ..  they make her my WIFE!  And
then they make Bobby my nephew, and Lori HIS wife, and they're like this
OTHER married couple, and they put us up in this duplex where they cut a
hole between them and put in a doorway.  So it's like we got two houses
made into one, so my whole family is together, but we have to PRETEND ...
you know ...  to the town and everything, that we are two married couples
who just live next door to each other.

   Can you believe that, man?  Yeah?  Well I see what you're thinking.  And
I thought it was a pretty slick idea too.  And it WAS too, at first.  Like
at home everything was fine.  I had to home school the kids and all,
because they couldn't like go to public school if they was married, right?
But that was OK because the Feds, they gave us a stipend, to get along
with, and they got me and Bobby jobs where we ...  well I can't tell you
about that.  But it doesn't have anything to do with accounting.  I can
tell you that.

   Anyway, we move in and that works out fine, except there's this
neighborhood association kind of group, you know, with the welcome gifts
and all that, and they come knocking at the doors and inviting us to the
neighborhood Bar-B-Que.  Which was fine and all that, except when I show up
with Jill on my arm, and she goes to get something to drink at this bar
they set up, one of the guys in my new neighborhood comes over and starts
talking to me and he mentions how hot my wife is, and what a lucky guy I am
to get to climb between her legs every night.

   Yeah!  I'm not joking.  He was checking her out and talking about ... 
like how firm her tits looked and ALL that stuff!  It's TRUE!  And the
WORST part was that I was looking at her and AGREEING with him!

   I mean she WAS hot.  She was all dressed up, and had her makeup on, and
was wearing this slinky little dress that I don't know where it came from,
and she was laughing with the other wives.  And I'm looking at her while
this creep is undressing her with his mouth and I get a HARDON!  For my own
DAUGHTER!  Yeah, except she's supposed to be my wife, right?  So I have to
ACT like she's my wife.

   Man!  I'm telling you it is a difficult thing to do.

   What?  Oh yeah, this guy's wife was there too.  Yeah, he pointed her
out. She was this cute little number, real short, with short black hair,
kind of pixie looking, you know what I mean?  But she had a set of tits on
her that were like the front bumper of a '57 Buick.  I mean they stuck out
a foot.

   And then ...  and THEN ...  this guy says "You know, we're a close knit
neighborhood, and we take care of each other around here.  We share things
...  if you know what I mean."

   Well I thought he was talking about "Hey buddy, I need a rake, you got
one I can borrow?" So I say "That's nice, cause every neighborhood should
be that way."

   So then he goes on to tell me they have these parties sometimes, where
everybody gets together and the women sort of show off a little and each
one chooses a different lap to sit on.  He didn't go into more detail than
that, but I got the picture.

   YES!  I am NOT lying here man.  And he invites "me and the missus" to
one of these parties!  Man, I'm telling you I didn't know WHAT to do.

   So anyway, I wandered off to get a drink, and I really NEEDED one by
now, so I got me a double scotch and then the burgers were done, so I ate
one of those, and who comes up to me but little miss pixie with the short
black hair and the tits that reach to Cincinnati.

   "Hi Mark" she says ...

   Oh shit, I wasn't supposed to tell you my name.  Oh, I guess it's OK, I
mean we'll never see each other again, right?

   Yeah, well she says "Hi Mark" in this sugary voice that makes my dick
twitch.  Then she tells me how she met my wife, and about how cute she is
and how much they're going to be friends and all.  Then she says "George
told me he invited you to one of our little parties.  I just want you to
know that I'm really looking forward to ...  sitting on your lap."

   Hey, man, I got to tell you.  I hadn't had a woman in over two years,
and I about shot off in my pants.  I mean who WERE these people?  Right.

   So I catch Jill's eye, and I give the nod to Bobby and Lori, and I start
fading toward the sidewalk.  Jill comes over all bouncy and giggling and
happy and she hugs me, and like, I suddenly notice how big and soft her
tits are, all pressed up against me and stuff.  And I'm so distracted by
that that by the time I'm about to tell her we need to get the hell OUT of
there she's saying how we've been invited to ANOTHER party and isn't THIS
one so cool...

   Yeah, right.  Back home we never went to stuff like this.  I mean back
home, the only time people got together in the street was for a riot or
something, you know what I mean?

   Yeah, well anyway, Lori and Bobby come up to us and THEY'RE all giggly
and happy and stuff and talking about how THEY got invited to another party
too, and the girls both point out little miss pixie and say how Valerie
invited them, and insisted that they bring something sexy for the fashion
show they have at parties like this, and the girls are so excited and happy
that I just never said "NO" about going.  You know?

   I mean, what could be so horrible?  A little sexy modeling, and some
kissy face and maybe some squirming around on some boners.  That's not all
THAT horrible, right?  Yeah, I know.  I was in denial.  I figured there
would be more than that, but I tried to convince myself that it would be
OK. I mean the kids were all so excited and happy and all.

   Yeah, well, we went on home and the kids were all chatting about how
cool the party was going to be and all that, and I just went to bed.  I
didn't have the heart to tell them what I was WORRIED was going to happen
at that party ...  well PROBABLY going to happen, anyway.

   So the next morning Bobby and I went off to work and Jill an Lori were
gabbing about how they were going to go shopping for something to wear to
this party.

   Then Bobby and I get off work - we work together, part time - and we go
back home and the girls are all giggling about how they found the perfect
outfits.

   But they won't show them to us.

   "You have to wait like everybody else" they chorused.  So I snuck into
"our" bedroom.  Yeah, we had to have a bedroom that at least LOOKED like
two people slept there, you know with dressers and closets and all that
stuff.  Both sides of the duplex had 'guest' bedrooms, which, of course, is
where us guys ended up sleeping.

   Yeah, well anyway I was digging around, looking for packages, or boxes
or whatever that were new, cause I wanted to see these outfits right?  I
mean I'm the dad, right?  But I don't find anything.  I turned around and
there was Jill, standing there with her arms crossed under those big
beautiful breasts - I know, man, it was like I couldn't keep from looking
at them once I'd ...  LOOKED at them, you know?  Yeah, well, she was
standing there and she didn't look happy.

   "Daddy," she started out.  "I know you feel like you have to protect us
and all that, but we have a whole new life, Daddy, and it's a BETTER life,
and we're going to have to live it, cause that's all we have."

   And I'm thinking "Wow, what happened to my little girl?  She's all grown
up and smart and ...  gosh," I don't even know what to think, right?

   So I stopped looking and gave her a hug and said I was sorry.  Then I
gave her another hug.

   I tell you I loved feeling those milk pillows against my chest.  I know
it's perverted and all, but I loved it.

   Yeah, I know, it's getting late.  But we've probably still go an hour.
Yeah, I really appreciate you letting me get this off my chest, cause well,
more stuff happened, and I don't feel so good about it and it really helps
to like ...  share it with somebody.  OK?

   Hey, I appreciate it.  Gimme a minute and I'll buy you a cuppa coffee.

   So anyway, pretty soon it's Friday night and it's time to go to this
party, that is being held over at the Johnson's or some place, I don't
remember.  That's not important.

   What's important is that we get there and all the women disappear into
the back of the house.  And Mr.  Johnson, or whoever he is, he breaks open
the bar and he's got EVERYTHING in there.  And I mean EVERYTHING.  He asks
me what I like and I say "Scotch" and he hands me a BOTTLE of twelve year
old scotch and says "Enjoy".

   So I pour myself a triple and I'm savoring that smoky taste and this guy
walks up and says "Hey Herb, did you ever get any more Jamaican?"

   Shit!  Old Herb pulls out a four finger bag of the greenest prettiest
weed I ever laid eyes on, and not a seed or stem to be seen, and he lays
this ceramic pipe thing on the counter.  It fits AROUND your mouth, and you
can pack it with crushed ice that cools the smoke.  The guy says
"Outstanding!" and toddles off with enough quality weed to get the entire
neighborhood high, much less him and whoever he's going to share it with.

   I mean it was THAT kind of party.

   All thoughts of just a little kissy face evaporated from my mind, let me
tell you that.  I knew now that these people were SERIOUS!

   Well, the girls gave us half an hour to get lubricated and then the
'fashion show' started.

   The first one out was this red headed woman who was about six feet tall
with legs that went ALL the way to the floor, if you know what I mean.  She
had on a G string bikini that was tiger striped.  Well, I should say tiger
STRIPE, because there was only enough cloth in that suit for one stripe. 
Yeah, it was small.  And she whirls around and her butt is bare, and she
bends over and reaches back and spreads her cheeks and I about shit.  Then
she's off to sit on laps and squirm.  I found out then that they move
around, squirming on one lap for a while and then moving to a NEW lap.

   And here comes another woman, and this one is wearing an evening gown
that has no back in it what-so-ever, and the top of her butt cheeks are
showing, with her plumber's crack, if you know what I mean.

   And this chick can come take care of my pipes any day.  She's got long
brown hair, and her nipples are poking through the cloth of the front of
this dress.  She's whirling around and one of the straps comes off her
shoulder and WHAM, just like that her left breast is bare.  She just
giggles and pulls the dress back up and she's off to sit on laps.

   And then, while I wasn't looking, Jill came out there.

   And the outfit she had bought was a set of baby doll pajamas, with the
little transparent panties?  And the little transparent jacket?  And
nothing else?  I mean there might have been a bra that came with the thing,
but if there was she wasn't wearing it.  And you could see EVERYTHING, man.


   There was my daughter, and every dick in the place was rock hard,
including mine.

   And, like the others she whirls around and the jacket blows up and
there's her bare titties for all the world to see.  And, like all the
others, she goes off to sit on laps.

   I would have got up and gone to get her.  I swear.  Except the evening
dress appeared and sat on my lap and wiggled.  And her strap kept falling
down, sometimes BOTH of them.  And I couldn't just push her on the floor,
right?  That wouldn't be polite at all, right?

   There were two more women before Lori stepped out.

   Now this is my sixteen year old daughter ..  you know, back then she was
sixteen, right?  But the Government had given her a new birth certificate
that said she was EIGHTEEN.  And everybody there thought she was married
and broken in already, but I knew for a FACT she was virgin, cause I never
let her go ANYWHERE back in New Yo...  back where we came from.

   And she has on thigh high stockings held up by a garter belt, and over
those are a pair of CROTCHLESS panties - I swear they were - and her bra is
one of those things that goes under the tits and holds them up, but that's
all?  You know what I mean?  So her tits are sitting there on top of this
bra.  She's got blond hair that her mother refused to cut, so it went down
to almost her ass.

   And I don't know where in the world she learned to walk like that, but
she came out there strutting like a real model.  You know how they walk
kind of fast, and all confident like?  Well it was like that, and those
beautiful titties with their red nipples - I think she put lipstick on them
actually, cause they were exactly the same color as her lips - they were
bouncing around, and her blond pussy hair was sticking out through the slit
in those panties and I'm telling you I felt precum make this BIG wet spot
in my shorts.

   And she goes and sits on this guy's lap and the first thing I see him do
is cup one of her teen breasts and lean over and suck one of those cherry
red nipples.

   Well, I'm telling you, man, I about came unglued!  I was about to go
kill this sucker when the redhead appeared from nowhere and straddled my
legs and sat down on my iron hard prick.  She'd lost the top of her suit,
and she had the most beautiful freckles on her tits, and she had these
long, thick hard nipples, and she fed me one and the next thing I knew I
was sucking like a baby.  I did sort of peek to one side every once in a
while, because if I saw any one of these chicks starting to get fucked ...
we were leaving.

   Then Red was gone and another woman took her place.  I spotted Jill, and
she was getting touched and stuff, but she was moving around pretty fast,
so I wasn't too worried.  I looked over and about shit when I saw Lori
sitting on Bobby's lap and he was sucking her titties too!

   Course everybody thought they were married, so I guess it was no big
deal, right?  I have to tell you, though, there was this one chick.  I had
met her at the Bar-B-Que and she had shoulder length blond hair, but was
real slim, kind of boyish looking?  Yeah, well, what she modeled that day
blew my mind.  She came out and I couldn't believe it.

   You know how kids dye their hair all those wild crazy colors?  Bright
pink?  Green?  Stuff like that?  Yeah, well she had dyed her hair bright
PURPLE!  ALL her hair, man!  And she had a BUSH down there!  She had so
much hair that it looked like a beard or something, and it was all sticking
out neon purple and stuff, because all she was wearing were strings of
bright purple beads.  She'd put them together so they went around her tits,
like they were a bra or something, and she had them around her waist, and
going between her legs.

   It was actually pretty cool.

   And she didn't hardly have any tits at all.  But she had nipples,
brother.  Man oh man did she have nipples.  They must have stuck out an
inch and a half and she had put lipstick or something on them that made
them just as purple as everything else.  She had the same stuff on her lips
too, and glitter ...  you know that shiny stuff?  It was all over her body.

   I got real nervous when I saw the chick in purple pull this guy's pants
down and sit on his cock and then start to fuck him half to death.

   But the guy next to me said she was showing off and that it was her
husband.  And a couple of the others started doing that too, and I got a
little nervous then, but some of them WEREN'T doing it, you know, so we
were safe.

   I got up to go get some more scotch, cause somebody had stolen mine or
something.  My bottle was empty, and it was hard to walk, but I was sure I
hadn't drunk it ALL, you know?  And this guy passed me a joint, so
naturally, to be polite, I took a toke.  Just to be friendly and all,
right?

   And man, I don't know how it happened, but I turned around and there was
Lori, sitting on Bobby's lap again, straddling him, like the evening dress
did to me.  And she was bouncing up and down and that seemed OK.

   Except his pants were down around his ankles.

   And everything was sort of unreal, you know?

   I had to sit down for a while, and I was talking to this guy next to me
who was getting his pipes cleaned by the redhead, who was a noisy slurper,
if you know what I mean, and then Jill was there and she looked kind of
mad.

   Well, gee, who wouldn't?  You know?  Like you take your kids some place
and they get pawed and mauled and sucked on and stuff?  Of COURSE they're
going to be pissed.

   Except that Lori and Bobby didn't look very pissed.  She had quit
bouncing and was kissing him like he was her ...  husband or something!

   And Jill said "It's time to go home Mark." and she was pulling at me, so
I stood up.  And she yelled at Bobby and Lori, cause we came in "their"
car. And Lori stood up...

   and there was this long thin white string of something that went from
the slit in those crotchless panties to Bobby's prick.  And I knew right
then it was CUM, man, and I knew he'd actually put it IN her instead of
pretending to fuck her and that he'd actually CUM inside his SISTER!

   Man I didn't know what to do.  You see why I needed to talk to somebody?

   Well, Jill pulled me outside and to the car.  I don't remember the whole
ride home, except that I remember Jill being mad and saying something like
"A lot of good you are to me in THIS condition." Well SHIT.  It's not like
I was the designated driver or something.  I mean what did she want from
me, you know?  And then she and the other kids were laughing and talking
about how great the party was and I think I passed out or something.

   So what I'm trying to tell you is that it was all strange and stuff, and
everything happened so fast.  I mean we hadn't even been in town for more
that a couple of days.  You know?

   So when I woke up the next morning I knew something was wrong.  I knew
it because my morning woody felt ...  different.  Like I was harder than
usual or something.  I mean you know how those piss hardons can be, but
this was different some way.  I looked down and I was naked, and then I
looked around and I was in Jill's room ...  on HER bed.  And there was
humming coming from the master bathroom.  The door was open to there and
the light was on.  I heard a cabinet close and the light went off, so I
figured somebody, whoever was in there, was coming out, so I closed my eyes
again, like I was still asleep.  I was peeking through my eyelashes, and it
was Jill.

   And SHE was naked too!

   Man oh man did she look fine.  And I about shit because she just came
over to the bed, and leaned over and sucked my prick into her mouth.  BOOM!
Just like that.  She jacked it a couple of times and played with the tip a
little and then stood back up.  She was sort of mumbling, like she was
talking under her breath.  "Come ON daddy, when are you going to wake UP!?"
And she leaned over and sucked on my knob some more.

   I felt some precum ooze out and she slurped it up.  I could tell she
tasted it because she went "Mmmm" and smacked her lips.

   Just then Lori stuck her head in the door to the room.  "Any luck?" she
asked.

   Jill just looked over at her, with her hand wrapped around my cock and
said "It's hard enough, but he's still asleep, and I don't want to do it
while he's asleep."

   Lori just grinned and said "Well, good luck.  Remember ...  I'm NOT
sorry I did it." I didn't know what she meant then, but I found out soon
enough.

   So anyway, there I was.  I actually didn't have much of a hangover, but
I had to piss bad.  So I waited until she turned away for something and I
just sat up and got up and walked into the bathroom like it was the most
normal thing in the world.  I heard her yip "DADDY!" but I kept going.  I
was so rattled that I didn't even close the door to the bathroom.

   So there I am, trying to aim down when my prick wants to aim up - you
know the deal - and Jill comes and stands there, with her arms crossed,
buck naked, leaning against the door jamb.  And she says "You CHEATED!  You
were awake, weren't you?" I was all weirded out about all this, OK?  I want
you to know that.  I did NOT think all this was a good idea.  But I said
what was on my mind.  I said "How many guys do you think can sleep when
some babe is giving him head?"

   And she gets this goofy look on her face and goes "Awwwww do you REALLY
think I'm a babe, Daddy?"

   Well, I was done pissing, and they usually go down when you get that out
of the way, but old Champ down there was still trying to aim up, so I
turned to and I said "Why don't you ask HIM.  He sure seems to have
something to say."

   And you know what she did?  You know how sometimes those cheerleaders,
like at a football game or something, they clap their hands?  But like
their hands are up in front of their face when they do it, and they only
spread them apart maybe four or five inches, and they leave their hands
stiff when they clap them real fast?  She did that and she jumped up and
down and she SQUEALED when she did it and said "OH GOODY!"

   Now you have to believe me when I tell you this.  I told her what she
was wanting to do - and I know we BOTH know what she was wanting to do -
was wrong, and bad and all that kind of thing, but you know what she said?
See how weird this was?  You can't even guess what she said, can you?

   She said "Daddy, people THINK we're married, and we have to LIVE like
we're married, so I want to ACT like we're married.  And all the time she
was pushing me toward that bed ...  her bed ...  and Old Champ was bobbing
and going "OH YEAH, OH BOY, OH GOODY!"

   Well, sir, she pushed me down on that bed and she jumped up on top of me
and she said "Daddy I'm going to do this with or without your help, and
Lori said it hurts a little, but it gets better right away, and one way or
another I'm not going to be a virgin ten minutes from now, so help me
PLEASE, Daddy?"

   How about that?  My 18 year old baby was still unfucked!  And she
decided to let ME be the one to pick that cherry!

   Well, you're a guy, so I know you understand.  I couldn't help myself.

   Yup, I held it for her while she lined it up and when the tip went in
her she just dropped like a stone.

   She squeaked some, I'll tell you that!  And I think she even cried a
little bit, but she was hot to trot when she started and she turned out to
be just as hot blooded as her sister, who I found out was cherry too until
she had Bobby solve THAT little problem at that party.

   Inside of those ten minutes she was talking about she had a cunt full of
daddy spooge and I'd rolled her over to work up another helping, because I
was still just as hard as a New Jersey winter.  She was yowling and
carrying on something awful, to the point that Lori ran in there to see
what was going on.

   Could you even begin to imagine what she thought when she saw her
daddy's skinny white butt bouncing up and down between her sister's lily
white thighs.

   But what she SAID was "Did I LIE, Jill?  Wasn't I telling you the
TRUTH?" and Jill yelled out "OH DADDY DON'T EVER EVER STOP DOING THIS."
Well, her pussy just ate my cock right up and I had to shoot her full of
baby makers again just to cool her off a little.

   So you can imagine my surprise when, being a good Daddy and all I asked
her when it was exactly that she got on the pill, because I didn't remember
anything about taking her to the doctor and doing all that.

   Not for Lori either, for that matter.

   I think I said "You ARE on the pill, aren't you baby?"

   She had sort of collapsed back on the bed, and was just lying there
while I kept moving in her, cause she felt so fine and hot and tight, even
though I was all shot out, at least for a while.

   She smiled brightly and said "Sure Daddy, the witness protection guys
got them for us."

   Now, I remember this part exactly, because part of my brain noticed she
said "guys" and thought that was a little weird, because most of the girl
stuff got handled by FBI types who were WOMEN.  And, so later, when the
part of this story I'm about to get to happened, I asked her about it again
and she was absolutely sure it was a MAN who gave her and Lori their supply
of pills.  In fact he gave them a six MONTH supply, cause he said they
didn't want the girls getting a prescription in our new town right away,
cause that might make somebody suspicious.

   Well, long story short, Jill was a nympho or something, because she
wanted me to fuck her every day, twice a day and at night too!  We went to
two or three more of those parties, and every time she let the other
husbands feel her up and lick her and suck on her titties and all that, but
when it came time for the real deal she came over to me and got her pussy
prodded by Daddy's cock.

   I know Lori was the same way, because I walked in on her and Bobby
fucking each other like crazy on the couch ...  on the kitchen table ... 
on the coffee table ...  I mean everywhere.  They were BOTH nymphos!  And
of COURSE we shot off in them, cause they were on the pill, right?  And
even if you think about pulling out of your daughter, if she's whispering
in your ear about how strong your prick is, and how she wants to feel that
nice warm spunk way up in her belly ...  no guy could pull out after that,
right?

   And here's the part I want you to remember, and maybe tell somebody who
can do something about it, because what they did to us just isn't right.

   You see BOTH of my little girls got swollen bellies.  They had the
morning sickness and didn't tell me about it, and I don't know WHY in the
world they didn't tell me they had caught, because I KNOW they had to know
it.  But they never did, and the next thing I know I got two pregnant
daughters on my hands, and they're going shopping for baby clothes and
talking about redecorating the guest bedrooms and making them into
nurseries.

   And I got suspicious about those damn pills.  So I went into the
bathroom and I found Jill's and I popped one out of the little plastic
thing and I crushed it and I tasted it.

   Now, I know that sounds goofy, because what's a birth control pill
supposed to taste like?  Hell, I don't know.

   But I don't think it's supposed to taste like sugar, and I don't think
they're supposed to just melt on your tongue like sugar does.  Call me
suspicious, but I think those bastards played some kind of prank on us. 
And that wouldn't be right, would it?  I mean it's our GOVERNMENT for
pity's sakes.

   But like who do you complain to?  I mean, when you're in the program,
they don't want to hear from you unless it's life and limb kinds of stuff,
right?  I tried to convince the girls that there was something wrong with
those pills, but they wouldn't hear of it.  They said the Government had
given us a new life, and they weren't going to rock the boat.

   Uh oh, here they come.  Hey I gotta go now.  The girls don't like it if
I talk to strangers, cause they're afraid somebody will figure out who we
are and all that.  Like that could happen now, after three years and a LOT
of changes..

   OH!  Hi honey!  What?  Who's this?  Um ...  this is my friend ... 
Johnny, yeah, Johnny.  He's on the same flight with us.  Yeah, isn't that
nice?  What?  Oh sure, where are my manners.

   Johnny, this is Jill, my wife, and our kids Jeffrey, and Thomas, and
that one over there is Jennifer and the baby is Melissa.  Yeah they are
beautiful kids.  Thanks.

   Oh, yeah, and this is my niece Lori and her husband Bobby.  And their
kids are ..  lets see ...  the twins are Jimmy and Gina, and the one
fighting with Thomas is Beth Anne, and the baby is June.  I call her June
bug.  It's a joke, right?

   What honey?  Sit with us?  Sure I bet he would.

   Hey Johnny ...

   Hey, where are you going?  Come on man.  We were just getting to know
each other.  I thought maybe I could tell you about some other things they
did wrong.

   Johnny?


   
