   The Master's Project - Ralph and Tanya 

   By Beating Off Bob

   CHAPTER ONE

   Have you ever noticed that a man and woman who have been married for
forty or fifty years look an awful lot like each other?

   It's true!  Look in the paper at the people who are celebrating their
fiftieth wedding anniversary.  Look at pictures of your great grandparents,
or grandparents, assuming they were only married to each other.  I'm
talking here primarily about facial features, and not necessarily the rest
of the body.

   But it only seems to be true for people who have been married for a
really long time.  The funny thing is that even though they LOOK alike,
they may be as different from each other as it's possible to be.  I know
you've heard old couples arguing, right?  I mean look at Frank and Marie on
"Everybody Loves Raymond".  Married forever and fight like cats and dogs.

   Before you write and tell me what a piss poor example they are, let me
remind you I know they AREN'T actually married to each other.  That's why
they don't look alike.  They're just actors.  But their lines come from
real history.  The writers are just remembering what their own parents and
grandparents were like.  Trust me on that.

   Anyway, when I first noticed this phenomenon, I got sort of fascinated
by it.  And everywhere I looked it was the same.  People who were together
a long time looked alike.

   Now there were two possible hypotheses, or questions:

   1.  Are people who look alike attracted to each other, and BECAUSE of
that they stay together forever?

   If true, you could hypothesize that, if two people look like each other,
they might be able to make a long lasting marriage.

   2.  Or, is it that they were they attracted by something else and ended
up looking alike BECAUSE they lived together for so long?

   In this case, the looking alike part wouldn't mean anything, except that
you could tell who had been married a long time just by looking.  Big deal.

   So, when I was in college, working on a double Master's in Sociology and
Psychology, and had to do a research project, I thought to myself: "Self
... why not do some research on that?" If I worked it right I could submit
the same project to both review boards.  I know it was an "iffy" thing to
do ethically, but I was overworked and poor and ...  well that's what I
did.

   That, of course, required that I have something I could research.  I
mean putting a bunch of pictures of married geezers together would be easy,
but it wouldn't prove anything.  So I thought about looking at a variety of
groups of married people, including younger couples, to see if they looked
similar or not when they got married, and then MORE like each other the
longer they were married.  Who knows, maybe there was a way to quantify
whether or not a marriage was more or less likely to succeed, depending on
the similarities of facial features.  Stranger things have made a million
dollars.

   So I put an ad in the paper, asking for married volunteers to provide me
with information about how they met, and who had photographic documentation
of what they looked like when they met, as well as additional photographs
taken since they had been married.  I should have put more in the ad, but
it cost per word, so I kept it to a minimum.  It didn't actually explain in
the ad what I was trying to do.  That I could do in person, and it would be
a lot cheaper.

   And then I began doing interviews.

   That's when it all went ...  well ...  different than I thought it
would. What happened was that I got laid.  I know that sounds weird, but
it's what happened.  And not just once either.  I couldn't put that part in
the paper, of course, but it's kind of interesting, and definitely says
something about the culture in which we live.

   So I thought you might be interested in how that came about.

   But, let me start at the beginning.  I know I already told you the
beginning.  I mean the beginning of actual work on:

   "QUANTIFICATION AND ANALYSIS OF PROBABILITY PATTERNS BASED ON VISUAL
CUES IN FACIAL ANATOMICAL SIMILARITIES OF MALES AND FEMALES IN LONG TERM
RELATIONSHIPS"

   That's the name of the paper.  Impressive, huh?  You have to have an
impressive title to get the attention of the review committee.  Or to
confuse them so much that they don't know whether you actually did what you
claim to have done or not.

   In either case you hope for a good grade and mention in one of the
journals.

   I won't bore you with all the analytical stuff in the paper.  But you
might be interested in the interviews ...  and what happened during some of
them.

   I know it blew my young mind away.

   ============================================

   Tanya and Ralph

   Tanya and Ralph were about as different looking as a couple could be. 
She was one of those dark redheads, with hair so richly burnished that it
actually shone when light bounced off of it.  It was cut in what used to be
called a pageboy and it flipped and flew every time she moved her head,
like it was trying to escape from her head and fly off somewhere.  She
moved her head a lot too.  She was a very expressive woman, aged
twenty-seven, and was one of those people who talk with their hands a lot.
Whenever she talked her hands moved, swinging across her body, or jabbing
out to make a point, bounding around and drawing the eye.

   That was fortunate for me, because Tanya was also one of those women
whose breasts are just small enough and very healthy, and didn't really
need a bra.  And she never wore one during any of our interviews.  This was
made obvious by sharply defined nipples that poked proudly through anything
she wore, including sweatshirts if they weren't too loose.  While she
wasn't boyish, by any stretch of the imagination, she had slim hips and
looked like she might weigh a hundred pounds if she were carrying a box of
books.  Her eyebrows were darker than her hair, and she cut them or clipped
them or whatever women do to eyebrows so that they started at her nose,
curved up, then down and then up to a point at the outside.  It made her
look like she was always asking a question.  She had dark green eyes, and
the whole package was one that just shouted energy and vitality.  She
worked part time as something called a "wire puller" for a cable
installation company.

   Ralph, on the other hand, was at least six feet tall, a good foot taller
than his wife.  He probably wore size 48 shirts.  But for his sandy colored
hair and beard, and his pale blue eyes that looked like what I'd expect to
see in a serial killer's face, he reminded me of a hulking gorilla that had
learned to imitate a man.  He unloaded trucks for a living and it showed.
Whatever was on those trucks, there were a lot of them, and they were
heavy. His eyes looked sleepy a lot of the time, but he was a sharp cookie.


   Tanya and Ralph had been married for four years, and he was four years
older than she was.  They had no children, according to the application
form they'd filled out.

   I did all the interviews at the couple's residences, because I thought
that might make them more comfortable.  I had a list of questions, but they
were designed more to break the ice and get people talking than to actually
gather information for the study.  I had been told by my advisor that if I
could get people to trust me, they'd babble about anything in their lives.

   Little did I know just how right that guy was.

   "So, how did you two meet?" was my first question.

   Tanya's hands darted around.  "He saved my life!" she said, excitedly,
like it had just been a week ago.  "My car slid on some ice and went into
the river and he jumped in and pulled me out."

   "Wow" I said.

   Ralph had a surprisingly soft voice for a big man.  "It wasn't
anything." he said.  "Anybody would have done it."

   He got a slap on the arm from his wife.  "Saving my life wasn't some
small thing!" she said.  "It's not like you were just bending over to pick
up some trash."

   And just like that they were involved in an argument.  It was obvious to
me that it was a long running argument too, that had never been resolved
for some reason.

   The budding psychologist in me recognized that there were underlying
stresses in this relationship.  They couldn't still be arguing about
something that happened four years ago ...  and had gotten married after.

   "Let's move on" I suggested.  They were both a little huffy now, darting
looks at each other.  "What was it that attracted him to you?" I asked
Tanya.

   "It was cold, and I knew I was dying.  It got all dark and I felt a hand
grab my shoulder." she said.

   I could tell she was reliving the experience.  There was a kind of
horror in her eyes.

   "I woke up coughing and his face was right above mine, dripping water on
me.  There was something in his eyes ...  hope or something."

   "I had to do mouth-to-mouth on her." Ralph said, filling in the blank.

   "And I knew he had saved me, but I was so cold and shivering so much
that I couldn't talk." she finished.  "And the ambulance came and he went
with me in the back to the hospital and waited until they told him I was
going to be OK.  He was still in his wet clothes with a blanket wrapped
around him, but he waited." she said.  "He even went out and got me new
clothes so I wouldn't have to go home wet." Now her eyes had what could
only be called devotion in them as she stared at her husband.  "And I knew
I wanted him in my life forever ...  that I wanted him to father my
babies." The light dimmed in her eyes and she looked away from him.

   Ralph had slumped there at the last.  Their reaction to the last part of
the story was palpable.

   I turned to Ralph.  "And you?"

   He leaned back in the chair.  "She was so light, and beautiful ...  even
wet and muddy from where I had to pull her ashore.  And when she coughed
and started breathing again I felt like it was a miracle.  I was going with
another girl at the time, but it just seemed shallow and empty compared to
what had just happened." He smiled.  "She just stole my heart.  I couldn't
think of anything but her for days.  So I called her, on the excuse of
finding out how she was doing."

   Tanya took over the story.  "And he was so cute and shy on the phone, so
I told him he had to let me cook him dinner ...  to pay him back.  And he
came over and as soon as I saw him I forgot all about dinner.  It burned
..." she blushed.

   "We kind of got carried away." said Ralph.

   "So it was love at first sight?" I asked.

   "I guess you could call it that." said Tanya.  "I was a virgin when I
met him.  Hadn't even thought about really trying to have a serious
relationship - I was kind of shy."

   "You weren't shy that night." said Ralph, grinning.

   "All I did was give you a "thank you kiss", you beast." she said, waving
her hands.  "And the next thing I knew we were in bed and you were doing
horrible things to me!"

   "You tore three buttons off my shirt!" he objected.  "I couldn't have
fought you off if I had a battalion of Marines backing me up!"

   I realized my mouth was open.  Ralph could break his wife in two if he
wanted to.  But then, trying to imagine the scene they were describing, if
I'd have been him, I wouldn't have struggled too hard.  She was a good
looking woman.

   Tanya tossed her head and sniffed.  She looked at me like she'd just
remembered I was there.  "Anyway, after he had his way with me ..." She
grinned sideways at him and slapped him lightly on the arm again, "I told
him he had to marry me because my life was his.  It's an old Chinese
custom."

   "You don't look Chinese" I commented, joking.

   "You don't have to BE Chinese to think it's a good custom." she replied
tartly.

   Ralph just looked up at the ceiling.

   "So you proposed to him the second time you ever saw him." I prompted.

   "No, I demanded that he propose to ME the second time I saw him." she
corrected me.

   "And you did?" I said to Ralph.

   "Definitely!" he said.  "And it wasn't hard at all.  Except when I had
to tell Trudy we couldn't go out any more because I was engaged.  She was
my girlfriend ...  well the girl I had been going out with ...  you know
what I mean."

   Tanya looked smug.

   I asked them some more questions and then gave them some questions to
think about before the next interview.  Then I asked them why they wanted
to be in a study about married people who looked alike when they didn't
actually look alike.

   Tanya looked surprised.  "I thought this study was about trying to see
what your children would look like."

   "Uh ...  no." I said.  I was caught off guard.  "It's to see if people
who get married look alike when they do that, and look more and more alike
as the years go by."

   "Oh." Tanya was obviously disappointed.  Her head came up.  "But we
don't look anything alike!" she said.  Maybe she missed my earlier
statement.

   "I would have to agree with that." I said, trying to be nice.

   "Why would it matter if people looked alike?" she asked.

   So I explained my theory about how I thought if people looked alike they
were more likely to have really long marriages.

   That just made them both look uncomfortable.

   "Look," I said, "It's just a theory.  There's no reason in the world why
you two won't stay happily married for fifty years.  I could be wrong about
the whole thing."

   "I told you this was a bad idea." said Ralph to his wife.  "It's just
going to make things harder."

   That was a singularly odd thing for him to say, in my book.  I mean why
would being in a study that THEY thought would tell you what your kids
might look like be such a terrible thing.  The question must have shown on
my face.

   Ralph slumped again.  "I can't give her any children." he said.

   "We don't know that!" Tanya objected.

   "Yes we DO!" Ralph said emphatically.  "We've been through all the
tests. If my sperm count was any lower I'd start growing breasts." he said.


   "Aha!" went my mind.  HERE was the underlying stress I had seen signs of
during the interview.

   Sometimes, when you're married, and there's a burr under the saddle, so
to speak, it's difficult to honestly and openly discuss how you really feel
about that burr.  But, when a third party is handy, and you can talk to
your mate through that third party, or at least in his presence, you feel
free to say some things that you might not say in private.

   That's how marriage counseling sometimes works.

   I felt sorry for them.  Their marriage had started on such a high note
of emotion that it was a shame that one of the first things Tanya thought
about - having this man's babies - couldn't come to fruition.

   So I stayed and let them talk.  They really HAD tried everything.  At
least up to the point of high tech solutions that cost thousands.  The
prognosis for that was miserable ...  and it cost thousands.  Ralph had
been involved in an accident when he was only twelve that had crushed one
of his testicles and severely damaged the other one.  He actually only had
one ball in his sack, and it didn't work for beans.  He'd had to take
testosterone shots as a teenager.  I think they must have overdone it just
a tad, considering that he looked like the proverbial alpha male.

   The rest of his equipment worked just fine though.  And, in that first
rush of passion that burned dinner that night, his earlier problem had just
sort of slipped his mind.

   Until they started trying to make all those babies that Tanya suddenly
craved.  Almost losing your life changes the way you look at what your
legacy might be ..  or not be.  She wanted to create life ....  to leave
behind when hers was over.

   The result was that, while she was gloriously happy with the man who had
saved her life - had given her life TO that man in fact - she was miserable
that her sudden dream of making babies had been squashed.

   Adoption had been discussed, but it wasn't the same as having her own
baby.  Not to Tanya, anyway.

   Ralph, for his part, was completely devoted to Tanya, but there wasn't
anything he could do.

   Now that, folks, is stress.  And, it's the kind of stress that can end
an otherwise happy marriage.  They don't so much stop loving each other. 
It's more like a seed of resentment grows in each of them.  She blames him
for something he can't control.  His seed is nourished by the thought that,
if she weren't so stubborn about having a baby, they could be happy.  And
those seeds can sprout and grow bigger until you can't see the marriage for
the trees, so to speak.

   It's not the kind of thing that marriage counseling is really good at
resolving.  And while I had a lot of book knowledge on counseling, I didn't
have much experience at it.

   "What about a surrogate?" I asked, for lack of anything else to offer.
"They can do in vitro with donated sperm, can't they?"

   Tanya shuddered.  "The thought of some faceless donor's sperm being put
into me makes me want to puke." she said.  "And who knows what kind of men
...  donate?"

   OK, they'd thought of that before.

   "You could choose the donor." I offered.  "One of your friends?"

   "I don't think that would work well either." said Tanya.  "I mean there
are all those stories about how people get into court battles and things
over custody and all that.  Besides, it would be just too weird knowing I
have one of our friend's babies growing inside me."

   "Maybe you could pick a donor from a list." I was trying to help.  "You
know, review the files of potential donors, so you'd know a little about
them?"

   "We looked into that too." said Ralph, speaking for the first time in a
while.  "The cost is prohibitive.  You have to go with an agency to do that
kind of thing, and it costs too much to do in vitro anyway."

   In the end it was an unsolvable conundrum.  One or the other of them had
objections to every potential solution.  Tanya finally called a halt to it,
suggesting that it was time for dinner.  I hadn't been aware that they
intended to feed me, but as a starving graduate student I was always up for
free food.

   During dinner we talked about the questions I had given them to think
about.  It was things like what they liked to do before they got married,
and how that compared to what they liked now, and what kinds of things they
both liked to do together, and which things one liked that the other didn't
like.  We talked about the in-laws, and how they affected the relationship.
Tanya's mother was itching for grandchildren and hadn't been told there was
a problem.  That added a lot of stress too.  By the time dinner was over
they had both decided they wanted to stay in the project anyway.  They
suggested that they could be compared to the people who looked alike and it
might help somewhere along the way.  I liked them both, and said it would
be fine, though I doubted that it would actually mesh well with the
original idea.

   So we set up a follow-up appointment for another interview, a week
later.

   The following Tuesday my advisor, Ted, called me into his office.

   "I've gotten a request to vet you for your project." he said.

   "Vet me?" I asked.  Why would anyone want an expert opinion on whether I
was reliable or whatever.  They did that when you applied for a job, but I
hadn't applied for any jobs.  "You sure it was about me?" I asked.

   "Yes.  The Hardwigs?  They said you already talked to them?" he said.

   "Yeah, we had the initial interview." I confirmed.

   "Well they wanted to know if you were for real or not." he said.  "Asked
all kinds of questions about you." he said.

   "Really?" I was baffled.  I thought I had been very professional.  I
told my advisor that.

   "Mr.  Hardwig didn't sound upset or anything.  He just asked a lot of
questions.  Some of them were ...  odd."

   "Like what?" I asked.

   "He wanted to know if you were married or not." Said Ted.  "And if you
used drugs or alcohol."

   I stared at him.

   "You want to tell me what happened?" he asked.

   I was flummoxed.  "We sat around and talked.  She cooked dinner for us
and we talked some more."

   "You weren't drunk?" asked Ted.

   "Of course not!" I yelped.

   "You didn't fire up a joint or anything while you were talking, did
you?" asked Ted with a straight face.  He knew better.  I didn't even grace
his prod with an answer.

   "What do I do now?" I asked him.

   "Well, the guy said you had another appointment, and he didn't mention
anything about telling you not to go to it.  I guess it's up to you.  I
just figured you did something strange ...  You didn't make a pass at this
guy's wife did you?"

   I looked at him with as dark a look as I could manage.  He held up his
hands, palms outward and grinned.

   "What did you tell them?" I asked.

   "I told them you were a bonafied graduate student, in good standing, and
that you were one of the best." he said.  "That's really all I COULD tell
them.  Except that I did tell them you weren't married.  You're not ..  are
you?" he asked.

   "In the last six years that you've known me, when did you see me with a
wife?" I asked acidly.

   "I haven't even seen you with a girl." said Ted.  "I thought about
asking if you were gay, but we're not allowed to ask those kinds of
questions."

   "Ask your daughter if I'm gay or not!" I retorted.  It was a good barb,
except that I didn't actually know if he had a daughter or not.  I knew he
had a wife.  I also knew that nobody who wasn't legally blind would suggest
that they found her attractive, so I couldn't use her.

   He laughed.

   You know, I never found out if he had a daughter or not.

   Anyway, it was with no little trepidation that I approached Tanya and
Ralph's front door the following Friday night, perfectly on time for our
appointment.  I expected Ralph to open the door, but it was Tanya.  She
looked delicious in terrycloth shorts and a tank top.  I could see the dark
circles of her areolas through the cloth and her nipples poked at me like
bullets.

   Thinking of bullets made me wonder if Ralph owned guns.

   "Hi" I said nervously.  "I'm here." Like she was blind or something.

   "Good, come on in.  Supper's almost ready."

   Food again.  Only this time I wondered if there would be poison in it or
something.  I mean if you looked at it one way, they'd basically asked if
anybody would miss me or not.

   I followed bouncing dark red hair through the hallway.  That bouncing
dark red hair was perched over bouncing buttocks too, that that terrycloth
just hugged like it was a teddy bear in there.  I didn't really need that.
Ralph was around here somewhere and I didn't think he'd appreciate it if I
walked in with a big boner poking out the front of my pants.

   Ralph was in the living room, though, kicked back in a recliner with a
beer in one hand and a remote control in the other for the TV he was
watching.

   "Hey Bob." he said, lowering the volume on the TV.  He was watching High
School football on public TV.  He didn't act like somebody who was
suspicious of me.  "Want a beer?" he asked.

   "Uh ...  no thanks." I said.  I wondered if I should make noise about
how I never touched the stuff or something, though why he'd have thought
I'd been drinking before our last interview I had no idea.

   "Cop a squat" he said, pointing at the couch with the remote, like he
was creating a seat for me there.  "Tanya said dinner will be ready soon.
She was wondering where you were."

   I looked at my watch.  It was six thirty-two.  I MIGHT have been a whole
minute late, depending on the clocks they owned.  I could hear Tanya
humming in the kitchen.  She sounded happy.

   It was quiet for a while.  There was a decided dearth of conversation
coming from Ralph, whose attention was on the game.

   "I played for them in High School." he commented finally.  "Linebacker."


   Was this a warning of some kind?

   "That's nice." I said.  "I never got into violent sports.  I'm a lover
...  not a fighter." I tried to make a joke.

   "When you're built like me, you can't help but play football." he said.
"The coach actually begged me."

   I was saved from having to think up more things to say by Tanya, who
stuck her lovely head in the doorway and announced that dinner was served.

   The easy informal atmosphere of the last dinner was nowhere to be found
this time.  Tanya and Ralph looked at each other repeatedly, like each
expected the other to carry on some conversation.  It was so quiet you
could hear people chewing.

   At one point Tanya looked meaningfully at Ralph.

   He shrugged his shoulders and took another bite of really good lasagna.

   Tanya took a deep breath.  It did wonderful things to her breasts.  I
made myself look up at her face and she was staring right at me.

   "Remember what we were talking about last time?" she asked.

   Of course I did.  I was the researcher.  But then we'd talked about a
lot of things, so I didn't know exactly what she was talking about.  I
nodded, rather than ask dramatically "What do you MEAN?".

   "We talked about it.  Ralph and me, I mean." she added unnecessarily.

   She still hadn't given me any real information.  I just nodded again. 
Maybe they didn't want to be in the study after all and wanted to let me
down easy.

   "We talked about it." she said again.  She was clearly nervous now,
repeating herself ...  beating around the bush.  "We ...  um ...  we
thought maybe you could help."

   Well, I'd taken a stab at counseling, though I hadn't been really
comfortable about it.  But the counselor is always supposed to present an
upbeat and positive attitude.

   "I'd be happy to help any way I can." I said confidently.

   "Really?" said Tanya excitedly.  "We didn't know how you'd react.  I
mean it's really a strange kind of thing to ask, after all.  OH!  I'm so
RELIEVED!  I was afraid you'd be offended!  But there's so much to PLAN!"
She was all excited now and babbling.

   I looked at Ralph.  He was staring at her, his mouth full of un-chewed
food.  He swallowed and began to chew, looking at me.  He shrugged his
shoulders again.  At ME!

   But she was happy, so I tried to keep it going.

   "OK then." I said.  "So where do you want to start?"

   She looked startled.  "Gosh ...  I don't know.  I've never done anything
like this before.  Should we start now?  I mean not RIGHT now ...  " she
was blushing, and I was confused, "but I suppose we should start soon.  OH!
I need to look at the calendar!"

   She jumped up and ran to the wall, where there was a colorful wildlife
type calendar hanging.  Her finger traced along it to a place that had
writing on it.  Then it moved, from one square to another, following the
days until she stopped on that day's date.  "I don't know" she called out
over her shoulder.  "It's a little early yet maybe.  Ten days.  What do you
think honey?"

   Ralph was looking around, like he'd lost something.  "I don't know
Tanya. Whatever you think I guess."

   I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.  This all sounded wrong.
Something was going on here that I didn't understand and my gut told me it
was worth sounding stupid to find out.

   "Hey ...  guys ...  I'm not sure I understand what's going on." I said.
I put my fork down.

   Tanya's hands started moving around in front of those delicious breasts.
"It's been ten days since I had my last period" she said.  "I probably
won't ovulate until Monday or Tuesday.  But you never know.  I've been
pretty emotional lately and that can skew things sometimes."

   I finally got it.  You guys probably figured it out ten paragraphs ago,
but the thought had never entered my mind until she started talking about
ovulation.

   "You want me to have SEX with you?" I gasped.

   CHAPTER TWO

   Tanya turned around.  I could actually SEE her nipples get soft.  She
had a stricken look on her face.

   "Isn't that what we were talking about?" she asked in a surprisingly
meek voice.  She looked at Ralph for confirmation.

   He looked at me.  Damned if he didn't shrug his shoulders again!

   "I think so." he said unhelpfully.

   I stared at him.  "You want me to have sex with your wife?" I could NOT
believe this was happening.

   "I guess that's right." he said, finally stepping up to the plate. 
"Actually, we want you to get her pregnant." he said stolidly.  "If you
can."

   Well I guess you couldn't blame a guy like Ralph for doubting the
virility of a guy like me, when a real studly looking guy like him was ...
challenged.

   "I thought we were talking about marriage counseling." I said.

   "Oh." came a chorus from husband and wife.

   Tanya's eyes started leaking and she ran from the room.  We could hear
her sobs all the way until a door slammed and cut the sound off.

   "I guess that didn't go so well." said Ralph, standing up.  "Maybe I'd
better go talk to her." He headed for the door.  "Sorry about the mix-up."
he said.

   My brain was beginning to catch up to the events that had just flashed
past me like a poorly aimed roman candle.  I suddenly realized that I had
just turned down an opportunity to cuddle with, to put it nicely, that
lovely, sexy, delicious woman.

   "Ralph." I called out.

   He stopped and turned.

   "You really wouldn't have minded?"

   "I'm not at all excited about the idea of another man ...  doing that
... with her." he said honestly.  "But she wants a baby, and I love her and
want her to be happy.  And if that's what it takes ...  then that's what it
takes."

   "Why me?" I asked.

   "You seem like a good guy.  I did some checking up on you and everybody
seems to think you're good stock." He said it like I was a cow or
something. "And we don't know you very well, so you're not one of our
friends.  We thought we could come up with some kind of agreement where
you'd give up claim to the baby.  And Tanya thinks you're cute." He
grimaced at that.  "So it seemed like a good idea."

   "I'll think about it." I said impulsively.  "Tell her I'll think about
it."

   He actually looked relieved.  It takes a real man to do what he was
doing ...  a man who really loves his woman.  I'd just gotten my first
lesson in why some marriages last.  There aren't many men who would do that
for the woman they love.

   "OK, I'll tell her." he said.  "You going to leave?"

   "I'll stay here for a while.  If she calms down and wants to discuss
this, we can.  If not I can always leave and you guys can decide what you
want to do." That seemed reasonable.  Seeing a woman cry like that hurts
any man.

   "Thanks" said the better man in the room.

   I sat there for a while and eventually Ralph came back alone.

   "She's fixing her makeup and she'll be out." he said.  "Want a beer?"

   "Wasn't one of the things you asked was if I was a drinker or not?" I
thought he should know that I knew.

   "Some college guys party all the time.  Alcohol can mess up your sperm.
We didn't want anybody who drank heavy.  You don't smoke, do you?"

   "No." I said.  "The only bad habit I have is that I drink too much
soda."

   "One beer won't kill you." he said.  "I sure need one."

   He got the beers - one for me and two for him - and sat down.  Now that
the beans were all spilled, it was actually pretty easy to talk about, so
we talked about their "plan" on getting Tanya pregnant.

   He could live with the idea of it in general, but there were parts of it
he didn't like.  For instance, she wanted him there ...  in the room ... 
when I ...  well ...  impregnated her.  She said she'd feel safer that way.
The idea of me doing it to her was bad enough, but actually having to watch
was something he didn't think he could do.

   We left that alone while he asked if I'd be willing to have some testing
done to ensure that my blood type and hers would gel, and to confirm that I
didn't have any sexually transmittable diseases.  That was just common
sense, and I agreed.  He wondered about making up a contract, to protect
their interests in the result, if there was one, and I said that would be
no problem either.  I wasn't even thinking about starting a family yet.  I
was already thinking about a doctorate.  It's easy and safe to be a
professional student if you can get by financially.  I could, thanks to
some money left to me by an uncle, who said in his will that if SOMEBODY in
our family ever got clear through college he wouldn't mind being dead.  He
actually put that in his will!

   We were still talking when Tanya edged nervously into the room.  She
didn't look like she'd been crying.  Makeup is amazing stuff when you know
what to do with it.

   "Hi." she said tentatively.

   "We've been talking." said Ralph.  "He agreed to all our demands."

   I thought that was a strange way to put it, but didn't say anything.  He
was probably nervous too.  I would have been.

   But, strangely, I wasn't.  I wanted to put her at ease.  "Whatever makes
you guys feel good about this." I said.  "When I said I'd help, I wasn't
thinking of this, but I said it and I meant it, and I DID say 'anything' as
I recall."

   "You don't think we're perverted?" she asked in a small voice.

   I thought about that.  If anybody was perverted it was me, for wanting
to get in those terrycloth shorts she was wearing.  I suddenly realized she
had dressed that way to affect me ...  to get me to agree.  She wasn't
stupid.

   "I think you're a couple who is madly in love, who has this one little
problem that you're anxious to solve.  This might not be the most usual way
to solve it, but I can't blame you for wanting to."

   Her smile made my stomach do flip flops.  "Thank you." she said, with
dignity.

   "It is I who should be thanking you.  You're a beautiful woman Tanya." I
said.

   "Watch it there buster." said Ralph.

   I looked at him, but he was smiling.

   "So it's up to you guys." I said.

   "Can we start tonight?" asked Tanya.

   We both looked at her.  She had relaxed into that pose where one foot is
slightly pointed out, and all her weight was resting on the other foot.  It
made her hip jut out.  Her hands were behind her back.  Those nipples were
hard and pointy again.  This girl wanted to play.

   "We haven't done the tests yet." I reminded her.

   "When was the last time you had sex?" she asked.

   I thought about that.  When WAS the last time I had sex?  I knew it was
with Linda.  Linda had kind of soured me on women for a while.  That's a
whole other story.

   "Maybe a year and a half?" I asked, like they might know.

   "You're kidding." said Ralph.

   "My last breakup was rough." I said.

   "Really?"

   That word can be said a lot of ways.  The voice can rise at the end,
making it a real question.  But the way Tanya said it was throaty, like "Oh
PLEASE tell me it's true!" She looked at Ralph.  "Surely something would
have happened by now if there was a problem." she said in that same throaty
voice.  She took a step into the room.

   "I don't know." said Ralph, dragging out the last word.

   "Oh pleeease honey?" she begged.

   I got hard as a rock in record time.

   "If he gives you anything I'll kill him." said Ralph firmly.  Then he
looked at me.

   "Hey, I'm willing to wait." I said, not believing it myself.

   "I don't want to wait." said Tanya petulantly.  "I want to make a baby
now."

   "Good grief" said Ralph.  "Have you no shame, girl?"

   "Yes I do!" she said, color flushing her chest.  "And you KNOW I do!"

   "Could have fooled me." he grumbled.

   Damned if that woman didn't go over and throw her leg over his lap and
sit down on him, facing him.  Her arms went around his neck and she leaned
those luscious breasts against him.  She was so short that her face was
level with his.

   "You know I love you Ralphie." she said.  She kissed him a gentle, quick
peck.  She wiggled on him!  Man, she was good.  "You know I could never
love another man like I love you."

   "I know baby." he moaned.  "But I can't watch.  He's a good guy.  You
can trust him."

   "But honey" she whined.  "I'm going to want you too ...  when he's
done."

   "Oh shit." said poor Ralph.  "I can't believe this."

   I wanted to tell him he wasn't alone ...  to support a brother going
through a rough time.

   I kept my mouth shut.  I'm not stupid either, most of the time.

   "It won't be so bad." she cooed at him.  "He'll give me a baby and then
YOU can make love to me.  It will be almost like you did it." She kissed
him three or four times.  "Pleeease?"

   There isn't a man in the world who could have resisted that woman.  I
knew I couldn't, and I didn't think Ralph could either.

   "Fuck!" he said harshly.  "I can't believe I let you talk me into this."


   "It's because you LOVE me lambkins." she said in a little girl voice.

   How is it that especially big, virile looking guys are SO susceptible to
being called cutsie animal names?  The poor guy just melted and let himself
be led by the nose ...  er ...  I mean hand ...  to their bedroom.

   Over her shoulder, under that dark flipping red hair, Tanya said "You
need to come with us now, Bob." That smoky voice was back.

   I'm telling you this girl was in heat or something.  I guess wanting a
baby really really badly can do that to a woman.  I've known women who
could have cared less if their belly never swelled, and even a few who
didn't want children ...  period.  But for those who DO want a child, that
pull is stronger than lots of things, sometimes including society's
standards of behavior.  Most people would call her a cheating hussy, but I
knew better.  She wanted something and, under the circumstances, this was
the only way she could get it.  We could argue about whether she should
have enjoyed it or not, but that's a philosophical argument, and her needs
were driven by hormones and things in her body that she couldn't ...  or
wouldn't control.

   When I got to the bedroom she pulled a chair away from a long vanity on
the other side of the bed, where she obviously sat to do her makeup, or
choose which jewelry to grace her neck and ears with.  She positioned that
chair at arms length from the pillow that one of them used every night. 
She sat his unresisting hulk of a body down in that chair and pushed on his
chest until he leaned back.

   Then she turned to me and came around to the end of the bed.

   "I've never done this before." she said.  "I don't think I want you to
kiss me, OK?" Her hands went to the hem of that tank top as she said it.  I
was already stiff as a board, and I actually leaned forward a little as the
cloth was dragged up her flat stomach.

   She took the top off quickly and I could see her chest turn pink.  The
color flowed upward, like a thermometer, heading higher until her cheeks
were pink too.  She bit her lip.

   "I don't want to be naked in front of two men who have all their clothes
on." she said, motivated by some modesty that was both ludicrous and
charming at the same time.

   I was staring at her breasts.  Those sharp nipples were wine red, very
dark, set against slightly paler areolas.  I might have drooled a little.
She just stood there until her last words registered and I unbuttoned my
shirt and took it off.

   Ralph sat there, like a stone statue.  He was looking at her too.  For
some reason I looked at his lap.  There was a significant bulge there.  He
might not like the idea of another man doing this with his wife, but he
loved her and she WAS beautiful.

   Looking at me she pushed her terrycloth shorts down.  That part she did
slowly, the cloth moving achingly slow down, over her hips.  It left a thin
strip of cloth circling her waist, her hips and buttocks bare as the thong
she was wearing took forEVER to come into view.  It was wine red too, like
she had chosen it to go with those nipples.  Whether it was conscious or
not, she had turned so that she was in quarter profile to each of us.  She
stepped out of the shorts, leaving them in a puddle on the floor and stood
up.  Her hands came to her abdomen and slid smoothly across it, like she
was performing some ancient rite to awaken her womb ...  to tell it to
prepare for fertilization.  I don't think she knew she was doing that,
though.  She was looking at her husband.  It was actually HIS baby she was
thinking about, even if he couldn't give it to her.  Then she turned away
from him and looked at me.

   "Now you."

   I didn't wear underwear.  Underwear didn't actually DO anything that I
could tell, and it cost money, both to buy and wash, and as a poor grad
student I cut back on everything I could.  That was something I cut back
on. So when I undid my slacks and pushed them down, my penis was exposed
for all in the room to see.

   Writers of erotica like to describe the penis in their works as
"stalky", or "huge", or maybe "thickly veined" and things like that.  I
just had a penis, probably like a few million others.  It was long enough
that when I jerked off there were a couple of inches that stuck out from my
hand when it was in the "down" position.  I wasn't circumcised, and the
crown of the glans made a funny looking kind of circular bump all the way
around it when the foreskin was covering the head.  I'd always thought it
looked kind of deformed.  When it was hard, like it was then, it was
straight, but leaned to the left and slightly up.  All in all I thought it
looked like it had been in a bad wreck once, and healed slightly wrong,
like a poorly set broken bone.  It wasn't anything special, but it was all
I had and I loved it.

   Tanya stared at it, her fluttery hands finally frozen, just like her
husband was frozen in that chair.  I had to bend over and pull the legs of
my trousers off because I'd forgotten all about my shoes.  I ended up
teetering on one foot, my pants slung out between my ankles as I pulled my
shoe off, and then the other one.  I was able to get out of my pants, but I
felt ridiculous.  Here was this gorgeous little sexpot of a woman standing
there, looking almost regal in her wine colored thong, and I was a bumbling
court jester in socks.

   I forgot about the socks when she thumbed her thong down.  It stuck in
her crotch, like it wanted to keep kissing her pussy.  She looked so good
naked that I actually FELT my socks on my feet.  I bent to take them off.

   You would have thought there wasn't any graceful way for a nervous woman
to get onto a bed in preparation for having sex with an almost complete
stranger.  She crawled on over the footboard, on all fours, to the center
of the bed and then collapsed sideways with her legs together and her knees
bent, landing on her left side, facing me.  It was like watching poetry in
motion.  Her back was to her husband, and I think that, more than anything
else, convinced my brain that she intended to deny him ...  and give
herself to me.  My prick jerked up and down a couple of times as I felt
precum sooth it's way along the interior and I tried to cut off that flow
automatically.  She lay there, just looking at me with wide beautiful eyes.


   I looked at Ralph and he was staring at her ass.  His arms were hanging
down at his sides, like he was dead and had been propped up in the chair.
I'm glad I couldn't see my own image.  I know I was standing there, my
mouth open, my own eyes wide and unbelieving, my hair probably disheveled
...  just a skinny guy, compared to her husband ...  with a jutting
obscenely dripping penis.

   Her right hand came up off her hip, where she had lain it when she
collapsed on her side.  She patted the bed beside her.

   "It's OK." she said.

   "I don't know if I can do this." I said.

   Now I know that sounds crazy.  But what I was actually thinking about
was that I wanted to lick her pussy and suck those nipples and kiss her
with long deep kisses and THEN make her pregnant.  But from what she had
said, it sounded like she wanted something more along the lines of 'wham,
bam, thank you ma'am'.  And I just didn't think I could do that.

   "Sure you can" came Tanya's confident reply.  "I'm not ugly or anything
...  am I?"

   "Oh no" I gasped.  I'd been holding my breath and was out of air.  "I
just don't think I can be as clinical about this as it should be."

   "Why not?" she asked, as if she were actually interested in what I was
thinking.

   "Because you're not ...  ugly." I said.

   "Thank you Bob." she said.  I KNOW she had to be nervous, but she was
cool as a cucumber.  "Let's just try, OK?" she said.

   "OK" I said.

   I took the few steps necessary to get me to the bed and thought to crawl
on, like she did, smoothly and gracefully.  But as I put my knee on the bed
she rolled, lying back and spreading her legs, drawing them up and out,
laying herself wide open.  Her pussy hair had been carefully clipped into
the shape of an arrowhead, with a V at the top, and a sharp point at the
bottom that pointed straight to pussy lips that were anything but flat and
uninteresting.  Those lips pulled open as her legs spread, and there was a
sticky line of her arousal strung diagonally between them.

   It caused my other knee to miss the bed.  Well it HIT the bed, but then
slid off, and I crashed onto the bed with my face by her left foot.  It was
too far to the floor to get my knee on it, and my leg had stretched out so
that when I tried to get it under me my knee hit the bed and I couldn't
make that work.  I had to slide my other knee back off the bed and crawl
back up to get on the damned bed.

   Her hint of a smile didn't help things, but I crawled up and between
those beautiful spread thighs, putting a hand on either side of her and
suspending my prick over that arrowhead.

   She was looking at it, hanging there, now pointing right at her face.  I
let her look, mostly because I didn't know what to do.

   Don't laugh.  Of course I knew what to do, but I didn't know when to do
it, or how to make first contact, so to speak.  Her head went back and she
looked into my eyes and I saw moisture there.  I didn't know whether she
was crying, or had something in her eye, but I didn't feel right just
jamming her full of prick with those unfallen tears there.

   "You OK?" I asked.  My voice cracked.

   "I don't know." she said.  "I feel happy, but I also feel like I
shouldn't." She turned her head toward her husband.  "Ralphie?" she whined.


   He unfroze and reached for her hand, scooting the chair closer.  "It's
OK baby." he said.  His voice cracked too.

   Looking down again, her left hand came up off the bed and gripped my
cock.  It's funny the things your mind thinks about in weird situations. 
What I thought about at that second was that she had to be right handed.  I
could tell because her left hand fumbled and gripped wrong.  But she aimed
it, and I started letting my body down until the tip kissed her pussy lips.
About that time she turned her head and looked right into Ralph's eyes and
took her hand away.

   Rather than string the suspense out any more, being the nice guy I am,
and so that she wouldn't have time to agonize over whether or not the prick
sliding into her belly should actually BE there or not, I leaned forward
and pushed into hot, velvety pussy.  I didn't stop until my light brown
hairs also kissed her arrow shaped dark red ones.  You might think I was
anxious to be deep inside her, instead of being the altruistic do-gooder I
claim to be.

   Is "Uuuhhhhnnnngggg" a word ...  a sound?  That's what came out of her
throat.  Her legs tensed and flopped up to bang into my sides too.  Her
eyes fluttered halfway closed, but then opened wide again, never breaking
from Ralph's.

   Her left hand came up and lay gently on my right buttock.

   And pulled.

   It felt so good to be in her that I just stayed there for a few seconds.
I hadn't split her open or anything, despite her diminutive size.  Her
pussy took me easily, almost joyfully.  She wasn't loose, by any means, but
she wasn't tight either.  It was like my prick was just made to be there. I
couldn't help but rub my bone against hers.  Her hips wiggled and I got
another "Uuunnngggg".

   I pulled back and her hips tensed, pushing up off the bed, like her
pussy didn't want to be vacated, but I had more room to move, so I got it
almost out and then leaned forward again.  That felt good.  I was still
straight armed, my knees dug into the bed covers between her thighs.  When
I did it again her legs flopped back down, like her muscles were too tired
to keep them up.  Still, her back arched and she lifted her pussy each time
I went deep inside her.  I did that about ten or eleven times.  It was a
very slow, sensual movement, not agitated at all.

   "Can you hurry up please?" she said, beginning to breathe faster.

   "Are you OK Honey?" asked Ralph.  Their eyes had never moved from each
other's.

   "If he keeps doing that I'm going to cum." she moaned.  "I don't want to
cum Ralphie."

   "It's OK sweetheart." he said softly.

   "But ...  mmmmm " her hips thrust hard against me and her knees came
back up.  "It would be wrong." I pushed in and she met me forcefully,
grinding her sex into mine.

   "No, it's OK." insisted the poor guy.  "You need to have an orgasm to
open up your cervix ...  remember?" They must have read that somewhere.

   "Hold my hand." she panted.

   "I'm here baby." he whispered, leaning in closer.  Their fingers
entwined and I could see the blood being pushed out of the flesh of his
fingers where they touched.  She was holding him hard.

   "Oh Ralphie, he's making me cum." she moaned.  "I'm
cummMMMMMIIIINNNNGGG!"

   When she said that and I felt her pussy clamp down all around the length
of my cock I pushed in deep and rubbed her clitty with the base of my cock.
I mean she was cumming anyway, right?  It couldn't be a terrible thing to
help her make it a good one.

   I was close anyway.  Her body was telling me "I LOVE THIS", even though
her mind and voice were fighting it, at least to some degree, and it wasn't
hard at all to speed up just a little and let my balls loose.  I didn't
tell her it was going to happen, but I know she felt it, because when my
prick started sending long heavy spurts of semen into her she thrust up
hard against me, not letting herself back down.  I was in as deeply as I
could get and her left hand dug in with her nails until it hurt my ass
cheek.

   I stayed there, plugged in hard, long past the time my dick gave up the
last of what I had in my balls.  She never pushed me away or said "OK,
thanks, we're done now." or anything like that.  She just kept staring into
Ralph's eyes.

   Finally she said.  "I need you now baby."

   I knew what that meant and managed to withdraw smoothly, and with grace,
crawling back away from her while Ralph, bless his heart, literally tore
his clothes off.

   Let me tell you something.  He might have had only one ball, but there
was nothing wrong with the rest of his equipment.  I knew why I hadn't
stretched her any.  He had a prick to go with the rest of him.  And it was
obviously ready.  He WAS cut, and while he wasn't particularly long, he was
much bigger around than me.  I found myself standing at the foot of the bed
with a perfect view as her RIGHT hand grabbed his dick and pulled it to her
sperm-filled gaping pussy lips.  Sloppy seconds it might be, but Ralph was
man enough to eagerly do what his wife wanted right then.

   And, in fact, as I saw him split her slot and slide forcefully into her,
I didn't see any bubbles of white being forced out, so I actually think he
forced my sperm even deeper into her than would have otherwise happened. 
She made a sound this time that was, without a doubt, an extremely happy
sound, and her hands grabbed his head, pulling it down for a whole bunch of
wet kisses as she squealed how much she loved him, and how happy she was
that he'd let her do this, and that maybe she was pregnant, and how they
were going to have a baby and on and on.

   I felt like a spy, and thought better of watching the whole show.  I
leaned over and grabbed my clothes and shoes, and slipped out of the
bedroom door.

   "DON'T LEAVE THE HOUSE, BOB" called out the happy woman.

   I felt funny staying there, but I was beholden to this woman.  She was
just amazing in my book.  He was too, for that matter.  So I went to the
kitchen and hunted until I found peanut butter and bread and made myself a
sandwich.  I got dressed first, just in case you're wondering.

   It was maybe fifteen minutes later when Ralph came into the kitchen,
dressed in a pair of gym shorts.

   "She has to keep her pelvis elevated for a while." he said, as if we
were talking about what brand of coffee we liked.  "But she wanted me to
thank you and see if you can come back tomorrow."

   "Again?" I gasped.

   "Well sure.  I mean it takes more than just once.  At least that's what
the books say.  It would be best if you could ...  you know ...  over the
next four or five days."

   "Are you really OK with all this?" I asked.

   "Man, I've never seen her so happy.  If you knock her up I think you'll
end up being my best friend in the whole world.  I'm going to owe you big
time, brother." He meant it too.  It was in his face and the hand he shoved
out to engulf mine.  He pumped it hard and I knew he could have ripped my
arm right out of it's socket, but it was just a firm, warm handshake.

   "OK" I said.  "I'll see what I can do."

   "Thanks, man.  I mean it.  She's laughing and crying and everything." he
said.  "But it's happy crying, I mean." He must have thought I was going to
feel bad because she was crying.

   I drove home in a sort of daze.  This was the kind of thing you wrote
about in a diary, or journal.  I didn't have either of those, naturally.

   So I started one.  That's why you're getting to read about this.

   ==================================================================

   I didn't tell my advisor anything about what had happened, of course.  I
just reported that the data collection was going apace.  I had planned on
interviewing another couple the next day, but that interview was at three
in the afternoon.  That couple were both fifty-five years old, looked like
twins and even had some of the same personal idiosyncrasies.  They were
High School sweethearts, who loved the same food, the same movies, read the
same books and watched everything on TV together.  They had both skied in
their younger years.  He thought she was the worst driver on the planet,
and she argued that she could only be second worst because he clearly had
the title.  Neither had ever gotten a ticket or been in an accident.  When
I looked at their High School pictures and wedding album, I couldn't
believe it.  When they got married she was skinny, almost sick looking with
sharp facial features.  He had a moon face, and carried at least thirty
extra pounds back then.  The pictures they had with their three kids showed
how he had dropped in weight and she had gained over the years.  Both wore
glasses ...  Black plastic ones back then ...  and steel framed ones now.

   It was great stuff.

   I worked on my notes, got a bite to eat and later that evening I went
back to Ralph and Tanya's house.

   Ralph opened the door with a smile.

   "Hey, if it's OK with you, I need to run in to work.  We got an extra
truck in and they offered overtime."

   "Oh." I said.  "Sure, I can come back tomorrow."

   "No, that's OK.  I mean Tanya says she doesn't mind if I'm not there
this time."

   "You sure?" I asked.

   "Yeah." he said.  "She feels like you were nice about everything, so
she's not worried any more."

   He took me into the kitchen, where Tanya was baking a cake.  Tonight she
had on a T shirt and jeans.  She looked just as beautiful as she always
had, and her smile of welcome made me feel good.

   "You eat yet?" she asked.  "I have some leftovers."

   "I'm good." I said.

   "Yes, you are." she said straight faced.  "But he's better." She nodded
at Ralph, who beamed.

   "I'm kidding." she said.  Then she looked startled.  "Except that I'm
NOT.  Oh honey you know I love you the best." She went to Ralph and snaked
her arms around him, reaching up on tiptoes for a kiss.  "I shouldn't have
said anything." she said.

   He actually ruffled her hair.  "Considering what you're doing with him,
I don't think you hurt his feelings all that much."

   I held up my hands and this time, on purpose said .  "I'm good."

   They both laughed.

   Then Ralph went off to work.

   It was a little strained to be there with her alone.  For both of us I
think.

   I sat down at the kitchen table and tried to make conversation by asking
her how she was.

   "I don't know" she said.  "This is all so strange." She poured the
batter in the pan and put it in the oven.  Then she got two glasses and
filled them with ice.  She took a bottle of soda out of the fridge and
poured before sitting down across from me.

   "I've never done it with anybody but Ralph." she said looking at me.  "I
think what's so strange is ...  that I liked it."

   "Me too, actually." I said.

   "You're a guy.  Guys will do it with anybody." She smiled, but then got
serious again.  "I didn't think I'd like it.  It makes me feel ...  I don't
know ...  slutty?"

   "I don't think you're slutty." I said.

   "You're sweet.  I think maybe that's one reason why I liked it."

   "So ...  do you still want to ...  you know?" I asked, feeling stupid.

   She laughed.  "You were more intimate with me than any man except Ralph
ever has been and you can't even say the words?"

   "Well" I said.  "I started to say 'do it' and that sounded crude in my
mind."

   "I'm not afraid of crude.  I make love with Ralph.  With you I do
something else.  And yes, I still want to 'do it' with you again." She
smiled.  She was a lot more at ease than I was.  "Do you still want to ...
um ...  do it with me?" she asked.

   "Oh please yes." I said like the horn dog I was.

   She blushed a little and fidgeted, but I could tell she was pleased. 
She stood up, and this time she led ME by the nose ...  er ...  I mean
hand, to her bedroom.  Thank goodness she didn't make me sit in the chair.

   This time she was more sure of herself in some ways, disrobing more
quickly, with utilitarian movements, not looking at me until she was naked.
She was still standing by the bed, though, and I got the impression that
she was having a hard time lying down again, like she had before.

   When I was naked I stood there too, probably looking similar to a
building with a flagpole hanging off of it, only with no flag.

   "You feel different in me." said Tanya.

   "Is that good?" I asked.

   "Yes." she said, looking down at the floor.  "Could you hug me maybe?"

   "Absolutely" I said and stepped toward her.

   Our embrace was tentative at first, but when I felt her hot skin against
mine I wanted more and I pulled her against me harder.  Had she and Ralph
been standing like this her face would have been about where his nipples
were, but with me she had her nose right about at my chin level.  We swayed
for some reason, almost like we were slow dancing without moving our feet.
She looked up at me.

   "Would you kiss me?" she asked.

   "I thought you didn't want to do that." I reminded her.

   "I changed my mind about the kissing." she said.  "You were very gentle
last night.  Ralph doesn't know how to be gentle.  I bet you kiss gentle
too."

   And so, naked, my cock pressing against her, she kissed me.  And it was
gentle, at least at first.  It was a nice, warm kiss.  Followed by another
one.

   And those kisses got hotter and hotter until we were both out of breath
and she breathed into my mouth "Bob, I want you to ...  fuck me." She had
given the name to what we did.  With Ralph, she wanted to make love.  With
me, she wanted to just fuck.

   There was nothing smooth or graceful about how we got on the bed.  We
almost got tangled up, but she managed to flop down and make room for me
between her legs.  This time she used her right hand on my cock and she
pulled it to her.

   Again I pushed into her in one long shove and I got that sound again,
only this time her hands were on my face, pulling me down for some more
kisses.

   When her mouth let mine go she moaned.  "I shouldn't like this so much."

   I just fucked her, trying to push in clear to her throat.

   "But I do, Bob, you make me feel crazy."

   "Making a baby with a stranger IS crazy." I said, licking her nose.  I
dug in hard again and started rotating my loins, scrubbing her clit.

   "Ohhhhhh fuuuck Bob" she moaned, her hips thrusting hard.  "Make a baby
in me."

   About a minute later I thought about what she'd said, about how Ralph
didn't know how to be gentle.  All Ralph did was give her what she wanted.
It was SHE who didn't know how to be gentle.  She bucked and thrashed and
dug gouges out of my back.  I couldn't kiss her any more because her
flailing head would have put my eye out, one strand of hair at a time.

   She didn't ask if she could cum this time.  She just did it and she
wiggled like a happy puppy all through it.  I was having fun by now.  Her
welcome had gotten us past the 'contract' feeling that had persisted.

   As she lay there limply, after that orgasm, I lay down on top of her and
did something I'd learned with a girlfriend from a long time back who had
broken her hip when she was little and couldn't spread her legs for sex
because of the pain it caused.  I shifted my knees outside Tanya's knees,
telling her to close her legs.  That closed her up and tightened her pussy,
but it allowed me to get even deeper into her.  I started feeling the tip
of my prick just barely touching the rubbery nub I knew was her cervix.  At
this point, with my arms straight, the only place our bodies were touching
was where I penetrated her, and where my abdomen rubbed hers.

   "If having an orgasm helps you get pregnant" I panted.  "Then have
another one, cause I'm about to make you very very pregnant."

   That got her going again and she DID have a second orgasm while I pumped
her full of thick white spunk with the tip of my cock kissing her hopefully
wide open cervix.

   Then there were more kisses.  A lot more kisses.

   Finally, though, we got up and got dressed.

   She wanted me to stay ...  to try to be able to fuck her again just
before Ralph got home, so she could welcome him with a slick pussy, like
she had the night before.

   "You just think about him spurting in you," I said, "and about how maybe
...  just maybe, one of his sperm will actually be the one to knock you
up." I kissed her nose.  "You do that and you'll be plenty slick for him."

   "You really are sweet." she said.  "You sure you can't stay ...  just a
little longer?"

   I held her away from me by her shoulders.  "This is supposed to be me
making you pregnant, not you getting attached to extramarital sex."

   She had the grace to look down.  "I know.  But it's so much fun."

   "We're not supposed to do this for fun." I said solemnly.  "Besides, I
wouldn't produce nearly as much sperm if we did it again.  You need to let
me build it up for tomorrow."

   She looked like I'd said something important.  "Of course.  What was I
thinking.  Yes ...  go home.  Eat foods high in calcium and magnesium.  And
lots of fresh vegetables." She started pushing me toward the door.  I let
her push, and didn't try to get a kiss goodbye either.

   She must have welcomed him home with gusto, because the next night, when
I showed up, he was all smiles and that huge ham of a fist of his grabbed
mine.  I have never gotten used to the fact that, in SOME situations, a man
can actually be glad that his woman is "sleeping" with another man.  When
you read stories on the internet, and it's that "cheating" scenario, the
guy is almost always a wimp who's either dominated by his mate, or he loses
control of the situation and his wife chooses the other guy over him or
something like that.

   But this relationship wasn't like that.  Tanya, while she loved what we
did together, didn't transfer her commitment to me or anything like that.
It sounds odd to use this analogy, but it was a little like a traditional
woman of the 1960s and 1970s, who cooked all her meals in the time honored
fashion, and who was given the gift of a microwave oven.  She didn't quite
trust the newfangled idea, but the more she used it the more it served her
needs and, pretty soon, it was a more or less indispensable tool in her
box. I was a tool that Tanya was learning to love to use.

   Tanya (and Ralph, for sure), initially not so sure about this
sex-with-another-man thing, came to look at the whole crazy situation as
something they didn't know they needed, but were exceptionally happy they
had discovered.  The overwhelming irony of the whole thing was that I
became one of the close friends they hadn't wanted to do this with because
it would be too weird.

   That, every time I showed up, I climbed up on top of a grateful Tanya
and stuffed her pussy chock full of creamy baby batter, meant our
relationship was based primarily on sex, at least in the beginning.  The
relationships they had with their OTHER friends weren't like that, of
course, so I became a "special friend." After Tanya passed her fertile
time, and we were waiting to find out if the mad escapade had worked or
not, I still got invited over occasionally.  And, because our relationship
was based on sex, I guess it was only normal that Tanya still had sexual
feelings toward me.

   But the rules changed.

   I still got hugs and kisses and Tanya still rubbed up against me from
time to time.  She delighted in giving me major boners, but announced that
it just wouldn't be right to let me fuck her when it wouldn't "do any
good."

   She did, however, talk her husband into letting her relieve my
"pressures" as she called them.  And she did it with the understanding that
Ralph would then relieve HER "pressures" immediately afterward.

   That led, somehow, to Ralph and I standing next to each other naked in
the bedroom, something both of us would have been uncomfortable with a
month ago, while she teased us both by stripping very sensually in front of
us.  Then she laid me down on the bed and began stroking my cock with her
right hand, while she gripped Ralph's with her left.  She couldn't quite
manage to jerk us both off at the same time, so she alternated, stroking
him only enough to keep him at peak firmness.

   When I started lunging around she looked up at Ralph and said "I don't
want him to make a mess." and promptly let go of him and bent over to
engulf my cock in her mouth.  We had never done anything like this before,
and I was so shocked that I came immediately.  She later told me she'd
sucked Ralph off lots of times, and that she hadn't thought about the fact
that I'd cum a lot more than he did, and almost choked that first time.  I
didn't know that then because she managed to ...  keep from making a mess,
as it were.

   Then, with a panted "Roll over Bob." she flopped down and pulled Ralph
down on top of her.

   This time I didn't leave the room.  I lay there, relaxed as Ralph's body
completely covered Tanya's smaller one.  That was when I found out she had
invented a new pet name for Ralph.

   "Fuck me Daddy" she moaned as they thrashed next to me on the bed. 
"Fuck my pregnant pussy."

   It wasn't an incestuous thing.  She was already thinking of HIM as the
father of her child.  And, to my initial surprise, it didn't bother me
either.  I hadn't given much thought to what I would feel if we actually
succeeded in getting Tanya pregnant.  Listening to her though, made me hope
that in a short time her greeting to him would be true ...  that he would
begin to think of himself as a father.

   Well, we need to move on, so I'll cut things short.  It took us three
months, but Tanya did get pregnant.  I've known them for six years as of
this writing, and have given Tanya three children, all girls.  Ralph loves
to dig at me about how if he'd have been able to get her pregnant, they'd
have been boys.  But he's like a Saint Bernard in a nursery school,
carefully stepping so he doesn't crush anybody, and loving every second of
the love he gets back from his four women.

   Tanya's on the pill now, because three is all they want.  But they still
invite me over every other month or so and while Ralph plays with the kids,
sometimes Tanya plays with me in the bedroom.  The natural evolution of our
relationship has led to the point where I now get to make love to her too.
She loves the father of her children almost as much as she loves their
Daddy, if you know what I mean.

   They want me in their children's lives too.  I got a new nickname out of
the whole deal too.

   Tanya calls me "Uncle Bob" now as I rut between her lovely thighs.
   
