Subject: My Pet Peeves
Story Codes: nosex
Updated: November 20, 2013
Author: Kelly <pghp_girl@yahoo.com>
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!!!WARNING!!!!
This file contains sexually explicit material which may include graphic
depictions of underage, nonconsensual and unprotected sex as well as
incest, adultery, sodomy and bestiality. It is distributed on a website
clearly identified as "For Adults Only". Possession by a minor is
strictly forbidden. If you are not legally empowered to be in possession
of such material, do not read it and delete it immediately.
This work is copyrighted 2013 to the author. It may be posted to non-
commercial "free" sites, or in the "free" area of commercial sites so
long as no changes are made to the content and the Author information is
retained. Any other use of this work is by written permission of the
Author only.
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Summary
=======
OK, so this is a rant. If you don't want to hear me bitch then this one's
NOT for you! Do you agree with me? Do you have any in addition to
these?
Table of Contents
=================
Chapter 1 - "Erotic" Stories
Chapter 2 - On-Line Profiles
Chapter 3 - Chatting
Chapter 1 - "Erotic" Stories
============================
There are tons of so-called erotic stories being posted every day yet so
few of them are worth reading and even fewer turn me on. When I read
most stories, e-mails, blogs, etc., usually I just want to scream! With
most stories, I read the first line and close the file in disgust. Here
are some of the things that REALLY turn me off:
1. Horrible spelling and grammar
I'm not talking about chatting where the intent is to converse quickly so
abbreviations and misspellings are acceptable. What I mean is if
somebody’s going to take the time and effort to write up a story and post
it then why not show a little class?
I would never fault someone for making a few mistakes (that would be
quite hypocritical of me) but some people are just downright atrocious.
Is there anyone who doesn't have a spellchecker these days? Even the on-
line e-mail systems like Yahoo! have one built in. Granted, they don't
catch everything but at least make the effort. And for those who don't
understand the concept of paragraphs... enough said. If you’re going to
write a story, take a little pride!
2. Posting in DOC format
In a world overrun by viruses, that last thing I want are Microsoft Word
documents which are known carriers.
3. No Introduction
When the first sentence starts right out with a detailed description of a
sex act, I rarely read the second one. Tell me a story, not a tweet.
4. Mechanical Descriptions of Sex
Is there anyone reading this stuff who doesn’t know HOW sex is performed?
What makes a story erotic to me and thus turn me on is when I get the WHY
behind the sex. I want to know the reactions of the people involved.
Tell me about their thoughts and emotions. What led up to the event?
What was their motivation? How do the people involved FEEL besides just,
“it felt good”? Don't just say “his dick entered her”, tell me how it
FELT and not just between his legs but in his head (the big one).
5. "Young" children with the vocabulary of an adult
Why do people try to pretend to be an eight year-old and then use the
syntax and vocabulary of a forty year-old? The very idea that a child
would be writing such a story in the first place is ridiculous so why not
use a third- person format? Even then they can get too far “out there” to
be enjoyable. I think it's pitiful when an adult man tries to pretend
to be a fourteen year-old girl. Give me a break. Who do you think
you're fooling? I can’t write that was and I use to be one!
6. Twins
Does every set of twins in the world have sex with each other? There is a
reason why the Milton Twins are Internet sensations - they’re the
exceptions. I don't even open stories with “twins” in the title.
7. Dead Relatives
Why is it that people think that the death of a parent or someone close
automatically leads to incest? The concept that a child will immediately
turn to the remaining parent or relative for lost love that includes
incest for the first time is simply ludicrous. This demonstrates to me
that the writer is just banging out a jerk story based on his own
fantasies and delusions without a clue about how real incest works.
8. Divorced Parents
Like the “dead relative” scenario, why are so many stories about the
start of incest based on the premise of a recently divorced parent?
Psychologically, divorce is equivalent to death in that one parent is
typically "lost". However, such a loss tends to strain the remaining
relationships more so than resulting in sex. Even if you ignore the
realities, the plot line is stupid.
9. Underage Lolitas
I'm not talking about teenagers, I mean preteens and in some cases
stories involving kids as young as five or six years old (or even
younger). Give me a break! About the last thing a young child thinks
about is sex.
C'mon, we were all kids once - have you completely forgotten what it was
like? Sure there may be a little curiosity before puberty but that’s a
LONG ways from feelings of lust and doing anything with the intent being
sexual. Even when two kids DO touch each other (who never played
“doctor” at least once?), that's not “sex” but rather just a natural part
of growing up. Based on the number of stories involving very young kids
that are posted, this must make for a good fantasy for a lot of guys but
so far as I’m concerned it's about as realistic as the mind control or
space cadet stories. It's just too over the top to turn me on.
10. Sick Brother or Sister
What do I really need to say about this one? I don't know about you but
when I'm sick or hurt, sex is about the LAST thing on my mind!
11. Fondling a Sleeping Parent or Child
Just because the mom is asleep doesn't mean that that if junior fondles
her that she’s going to suddenly have an urge to have sex with him. It's
far more likely that mom will spank his ass! Parents who fondle their
young children are usually child abusers and perverts.
12. Women Who Enjoy Being Raped
To be honest, I find some “nonconsensual” stories to be a bit of a turn-
on from a strictly fantasy perspective (ok, so we all have our
perversions) but not anything I would EVER want to happen in reality.
Kept in context there’s nothing wrong with the subject matter for fantasy
purposes.
What concerns me about these stories is that they could lead someone to
actually believe the myth that "no" means "yes". While this is the basis
for many porn movies and stories, it's NOT reflective of real life.
Attention men! When a girl says, "NO", that means NO. I have NEVER heard
of a real-life rape victim who said they felt anything other than disgust
and humiliation. Rape scars a woman for life. It's not something that
is EVER ok, no matter how much "she asks for it".
13. Father Who Enjoy Watching Their Daughters Being Raped
This is similar to the rape scenario I just described. So long as it
remains in the fantasy realm then I’m OK with it.
In reality I just can't believe that any decent father could possible
find enjoyment from watching someone hurt his daughter. Again, while I
find nothing wrong with the FANTASY, I worry that someone might think
such stories reflect reality and might take action based on this
misguided idea.
14. Interracial Sex
I knew when I titled this one that people would jump to conclusions so
let me say this right off - I am NOT against interracial sex. It’s just
that saying “interracial” is meaningless at best and racist at worst.
Who cares what color your partner is? He can be green or purple for all I
care so long as he has a functioning dick. All this crap about enhanced
penis size for black men and sexual aggressiveness for black women is
just a bunch of crap if you ask me.
Please read “My Thoughts About Inter-RAXCIAL Sex” if you want to know
more details about how I feel about this subject.
Chapter 2 - On-Line Profiles
============================
When I look at FaceBook profiles I’m amazed at how many obvious fakes
there are but even more amazed at how many people seem to believe them.
Here are some of the things that really turn me off:
1. "No Guys" Profiles
This is code for "I'm a man and I don't want to talk to men about sex."
2. "Women" With Profiles That Imply Incest
This is code for "I'm a man who wants to share porn pics and dirty
stories about young girls with their mothers."
3. Profiles With Pics of Girls Stolen From the Internet
Don't these idiots realize that other people can also see these girls on-
line in other places? Such profiles demonstrate not only that the person
is a fake but that they’re incredibly stupid as well.
4. No "Normal" Pics
99.9% of people that want to trade pics with me only have porn pics that
they stole from the Internet and expect me to believe it's them. If all
“she” has are suggestive and/or nudes photos, I know immediately “she” is
a “he”. If he only has a couple of "normal" ones, again they’ve been
stolen. Every real girl I know these days has a ton of her with her
friends and such in everyday situations. IF they have any suggestive or
nudes ones, they’re usually few in number and not readily handed out,
especially to strangers and even then, they’re NEVER the first ones sent.
5. Too Many "Friends"
Some people have hundreds of "friends", most of whom are fakes. What's
the point? I just assume that it's a guy who likes to link up with other
people who trade porn pics - not the kind of person I want to have as a
"friend".
Chapter 3 - Chatting
====================
There are two reasons I chat. First, I chat with friends although
usually we phone or text each other. Second, I chat with strangers on-
line for fun. Needless to say, there’s a huge difference between the
two in how I chat. Of course it goes without saying that I use
completely different accounts and the two never mix.
When I chat with strangers, there’s a LOT I don't say or do compared to
when I’m chatting with friends who know me. By the same token, I don't
discuss many of the things with my friends that I do with strangers.
It's like two different worlds, each with their own set of rules.
One more thing about chatting and meeting people. I don't cam or phone
because I have no intention of ever meeting an on-line stranger. That
said, if I WAS going to meet someone, then camming and a phone call would
be mandatory. As it is now, I have no verification that anyone I’m
chatting with is really who they say they are, just as they don't know
about me either. That's OK with me since my intention is NOT to
establish a personal relationship. Anyone who can't deal with the
ambiguity shouldn't chat with me. I can understand WHY people want to
cam and phone me and I’ve endured many complaints and nasty accusations
because I won't. Words can't hurt me but camming and phone calls can.
The following drive me nuts when I chat...
1. "Hi!"
This opening gets old really FAST. Usually I just ignore it and wait to
see if whoever it is sends another message that's more interesting.
2. "How are you?"
Come on, what do you EXPECT me to say? Odds are I’ll tell you I'm OK.
3. "asl"
Sort of old school these days... Maybe this is a good intro for chat
rooms and such where you are trying to hook up with a total stranger, but
that's not the type of people I'm looking for. Anyone that I would want
to chat with already knows this information so by asking it, the person
is telling me they don't have a clue who I am and are just shooting in
the dark to see who will answer. I've also found it to be the standard
opening line used by “bots” - which I HATE!
4. "What are you doing?"
Well duh, I'm chatting. What do you expect me to say?
5. "Do you have a cam?"
I NEVER cam with strangers - period. Anyone who pushes this is simply
added to my "Ignore" list. No matter what you might think, we will NEVER
meet so don't try putting me on a guilt trip to "prove" who I am. If you
don't believe I am who I say I am, too bad - go chat with someone else.
It's all just for fun anyway so why get all up-tight?
6. "Can I call you?"
I NEVER call strangers for the same reasons as for what I described about
camming just before this.
7. "Can I meet you?"
I NEVER meet people in person that I "meet" on-line. If I lead you in to
think you have a chance, it’s your fault for pushing the issue to where I
go along just to get you to stop asking. Trust me, we will NEVER meet.
8. "I'm (any age <18)"
I’m NOT a child molester or pedophile. I don't want to chat with kids.
I’m not looking to hook up with kids. I don't want photos of kids. The
first thing I ask people when they start a chat with me is their age. I
can't do anything if someone lies to me but at least I’m doing as best I
can NOT to chat with kids. If you say you’re 13, then I’ll also take you
for your word, immediately end the conversation and add you to my
“ignore” list so don't even joke about it.
9. "What are you wearing?"
If it's after 9PM, odds are it's a t-shirt or maybe a sweatshirt in
winter. Sometimes I like to wear one of my husband’s dress shirts.
During the day, who knows what I may be wearing and really, who cares? I
NEVER chat nude because I never run around the apartment nude in the
first place although I’m sure that’s the answer most guys are hoping for.
Sometimes I’ll tell them I’m naked just to see how they respond but then
I feel they’re asking for it by asking me in the first place.
10. "Send me a pic"
Send me yours first (NO nudes please) and THEN we'll see about mine.
What's the big deal about seeing pics of me anyway? I wouldn't say I'm
ugly but still, it's not like I'm some hot Playboy model or Hollywood
star. In any case the only pics you'll get of me are ones I would show
my pastor.
11. "BUZZ"
OMG, this has to be the most annoying thing EVER. Whoever came up with
this stupid feature in the first place? DO NOT BUZZ ME! If you do then
I’ll immediately add your name to my Ignore List without responding.
12. Hang-ups
VERY rarely do I initiate a chat. This is mostly to protect my privacy
and prevent anyone from accusing me of initiating a discussion with an
underage person, even if I think they are at least 18. Thus is someone
is chatting with me, it's because THEY asked. So when someone greets me
and then I answer and get no response, it really irritates me and I
typically add such people to my Ignore List.
OK, so these are my pet peeves, at least the ones I can think of right
now. I'm sure everyone else has a list of their own. Care to share
yours with me?
THE END