My High School Years Part 1

By Corbin

*********

I am NOT a writer...I am winging it here folks, so as far as grammar, spelling
and such I just do the best that I can.
 
It's not so easy, trying to recount everything...so I figure that I would just
start typing, hoping perhaps that I would become comfortable with a
starting place, hell any starting place would due. The irony here is that before
I started typing I probably sat in front of this stupid screen for about half an 
hour, just trying to begin and I actually feel there is allot to tell!
 
But doesn't everyone have a lot to tell about his or her lives? Well, maybe not. 
:) 

But as I see it we each live in our own small world, our own little universe if 
you will, a universe from which friends, family, loved ones come and go. It's 
really so complex when you think about it, everyone entering and leaving 
another's world. (I'll stop here or else I may begin to ramble into one of my
philosophical tangents). 

In any case, those are the things I spend a great deal of time thinking 
About (life, philosophy, religion), well, that is when I don't have
to tend to work and other such daily grinds. Knowing this little bit, you would
be correct in categorizing me as a thinker...and yes I can be quiet, in addition 
to that I like to keep to myself, so it's ironic that over my short life on this
planet (I am 24 years of age) I manage to draw so much attention, some 
good, some bad, depending on the mood I am in :)
 
I suppose there is an explanation for so much attention, there always is,
which now brings us to the answer, the subject if you will that I expect most
readers are really interested in. And I admit, it is my passion, a drive so 
deep within me that it seems to be self guided. Of course I am going to let you 
in *it*, allot of people know about it, that passion is 'Jiu-
Jitsu', or 'Grappling' as some of you may prefer, but you may not be able to 
infer such passion or interest by simply observing me, because as I have 
indicated above, I tend to internalize many things. I am not an outwardly jovial 
or an excitable person, I do not bounce for joy on my toes over things that 
excite me (Like my friend Sharon, she is my exact opposite as you will come to
quickly learn)...many times in fact I look bored...but in reality I find myself
rooted to one spot, fearful of moving least I explode from the inside out I am
so full of nervous energy, but energy I know how to harvest and channel
when it comes to competing (Applies to activities in my day-to-day life as
well).
 
Well, that's about all I'm going to discuss concerning that for now. Sorry, but
I am sincerely not trying to be mean here it's just that if people are really
interested in this story then you might as well forget about instant
gratification. I am pretty slow in everything I do, including revealing
important pieces of information about 'yours truly'. Anyway, if you've begun
throwing a temper tantrum in front of your computer because I am not
ready to further discuss my competitions, then you might as well give up now and 
go back to those other superficial stories along with your life (or lack 
thereof) of instant-gratification-fast-food-drive-thru living you indulge in. 
 
All sounds rather self-important doesn't it?

Having said all that, I went thru a drastic personality change when I was
about 9 or 10, which concerned my parents to the point that I landed on a
couch in front of a Psychologist. It was about that age that I started to dress
and act different, actually all I was doing was dressing 'down', trying to
retain my tomboyish ways. Yet Mother Nature was going to have none of
that as my body developed. But clothing is a wonderful disguise and I always
insisted in buying clothes at least one size too big, I wanted to have the
baggy jeans like the boys and the big tee shirts and jackets. None of that
wearing the waist line below the hips bullshit...
 
Anyway, getting back on track, my clothing attire alone was not enough to
push my parents in the direction of seeking out help, but it was my attitude
and change in the way I was acting. Yes, I became quiet...brooding and my
smile faded as I struggled with girlfriends who loved to dress in the latest
fashion trends while I simply looked like a fashion 'wreck'. I have to speak
my mind here and say, I am thoroughly disgusted by what I see going on
around me...I see these beanpole women on television ads for TV-shows
that are suppose to be strong, athletic women yet they look so anemic and
scrawny I doubt they could kick down a cardboard door. Maybe that's an
unfair assessment as I don't really watch TV that much, unless it comes on
PBS. I think I am just 'old' at heart and maybe too serious for my years. It
seems to take me forever to rent a video as I am so damn picky about what
I am willing to watch...essentially I am giving up two hours of my life for a
movie so it better be damn good.
 
TV Sitcoms - I don't watch them, boring and designed for the simple minded
people of our time.
 
So called 'Realty' Shows - Oh please, nothing real about any of them, it's
just another distraction from real life...taking time away from your life...and 
my life.
 
Sports - I don't sit around and watch sports. I need to participate in sports,
not be a spectator. I am after all extremely athletic and refuse to waist time
rotting away on some couch.
 
So anyway, back to what turned into my ongoing battle with my mother,
she would buy me dresses and other fine clothes that girl's 'maturing' should
wear, and I would return them to the store for cargo pants...loose fitting
jeans...and large sweaters. She would fume at me, but I was never one for
yelling or arguing so I just sat quietly while she lectured till she was red in 
the face...or blue in the face?...sometimes it was both I think.
 
My dad, well...thank god for dear old dad, I love him so much :) he really
supported me thru all of my sports and I think he was so proud to have such
strong girl. I was kind of the best of both worlds, interested in playing sports
while I could get dressed up (WHEN I HAD TO) and be his 'little girl'. Which
brings a smile to my face as I stand damn near 5' 11", which is a curse...I
don't like being the center of attention as I am going about my daily
business...but when your tall, blonde (yes I'm blonde, it was bound to come
up so let's get it over with) and athletic you attract attention, I mean what
the fuck, am I some tourist attraction?

To understand me, you also have to understand my friend Sharon, which is
why I have decided to start by talking a little about her. Somewhat odd since
I tend to think of this as a diary of sorts, *my* Diary that is. But since it's
MY diary I can damn well do what I like!

People typically have one impression of Sharon; A conniving, manipulative,
spoiled, rich, daddy's girl (did I leave anything out?) This tends to reflect 
badly on me, since we are best friends, housemates and on occasion lovers (Okay,
maybe that's a bit more information then you needed to know, but it's going
to come out anyway).
 
I am getting side tracked and need to get back to High School where we first
met.
 
Is anyone surprised that Sharon was a Cheerleader in high school? Not just
'a' Cheerleader, but 'THE' epitome of that pretty, perky, go team...GO!
bullshit Cheerleader type, she really believed that her cheers helped win
games which helped contribute to her becoming the Team Captain her Senior
year. I on the other hand, was the exact opposite, at Pep-Rallies I just sat
there and glared and those annoying cheers...they grated on my
nerves...and she was so damn irritatingly...well...Cheerful! But under that
girly, respectable, glitzy, high maintenance exterior is a tough as nails
competitor, a girl that would not hesitate to scrap and fight if you crossed
her; In fact she was suspended a few times for fighting. She won all her
fights by the way, not only because she knew how to fight (thanks to Dad's
boxing background) but Sharon was extremely athletic. One look at her in
that Cheer outfit and you knew those high flying jumps, spins and kicks from
her long muscular legs could also knock the snot out of you if you pissed her
off. The uniforms at our school were a bit too revealing for my taste, yet it
seemed to fit right in with Sharon's attitude cause she loved showing off her
strong, toned abs. Along with giving away amble amounts skin along her
neck, back and shoulders. I guess you might have already assumed that
Sharon was big into playing the tease and liked to torment guys with her little
seductive poses and flirtatious hair flips...*SOMEONE GAG ME NOW AS I TYPE
THIS!!!*
 
I suppose you readers want to know what she looks like?
Well typically, Sharon pinned most of her long, brown hair back behind her head, 
Leaving only a few wispy trails of loose hair to frame her face and cheeks. 
Sharon's naturally olive skin complexion meant that the slightest bit of sun 
added a nice tanned quality to her body. Her round, deep, blue eyes beautifully
enhanced the oval outline of her face, as a pair of full lush lips formed under 
a disgustingly, petite perfect nose.
 
As I've already mentioned, this sexy, innocent look could change with the flip
of a switch into the bad, evil bitch Sharon.
 
And guess who she was 'going-with' her junior and senior years? Captain of
the football team...excuse me while I pull my trash can closer and prepare to
heave chunks at that sweet thought...grrrrr.....
 
I on the other hand I was so introverted I rarely had a boyfriend...hell, I 
rarely dated. But that was my choice, more on that later.
 
Sharon could wrap any guy around her finger and string him along, I guess it
was a sense of empowerment that she enjoyed. She never took dating
David (Mr. Big Shot Football Capt.) too seriously as they were both Seniors and 
going to different College's in the fall; 
'High School boys are such a bore.' she would always say, 'I can't wait for 
College and really scope out the whole social scene.' For now though, she felt 
that certain expectations were to be met and dating a popular guy was a must 
within her group of friends.
 
Now comes the hard part...elaborating on the social structure within our
School...and pretty much the community we lived in. It was fairly complex so let
me start with something small....like our High School...
 
My School was an extremely socially complex place, paramount to that was
the fact that it was private and small in class size. Those two factors meant
that the slightest bit of gossip could spread in minutes and depending on who
you talked to, each 'click' had its own interpretation of who held the top rung
of the social ladder. Regardless, the general consensus was that the
Cheerleaders were the snobbiest, socialite bitches to ever grace the halls of
this school and the girl's Softball Team were among their biggest critics. In
fact, a verbal war had been waged between the factions for the past couple
of years, fortunately that was the extent of it.
 
It didn't help matters that everyone now knew that when Sharon mentioned
"The Pigs", she was referring to the Girl's on the Softball team. That really
didn't help things at all...thankfully I stayed in my own orbit, outside the
political warfare, 'fly below the radar' was my motto :) and most of the time
I succeeded.
 
Okay, just so you know, Sharon never really took her bitchy attitude
seriously, but it seemed that others couldn't see the lighter side of it, 'hell 
if I care' she often brushed the matter aside but as I got to know her I
discovered that she really did care. Oddly enough, our paths rarely ever
crossed, not even a single hello or acknowledgment from her, then again I
never paid Sharon much attention either. When we finally did met, well...let's
just say it was extremely memorable...
 
It was a hot, humid day...I remember that clearly because all the gym doors
to the outside were open and several big fans were setup to keep the air
circulating. Now just so you know, I took gymnastics and that particular day it 
was practice, I believe I was in the middle of working on a Sissone when I
heard that annoying squeaking sound that sneakers make when one is
walking across a freshly polished basketball court. Which is what our gym is,
one giant basketball court...amongst other uses. Anyway, I give a casual
glance over and here comes her highness, nose in the clouds, but now she's
giving me the once over and I'm just standing there in my gymnastics
leotard staring at her like some retard or something.
 
Oh and I love this part, she gives me her famous diva sneer and glances
away, 'Like what the hell was that?' I'm thinking and now I'm pumped because 
while Sharon is athletic, she has nothing on me in the physical
department (more on that later) but she can't touch me with some of the
moves I can perform on the floor. So I go back to concentrating and I can
just feel those eyes of hers looking back at me now...judging me...as I
perform 'Back-in, Full-out' (look it up folks, not easy to do) and I land 
perfect with a smile on my face cause I know she couldn't touch that! HA! One up
on Sharon.
 
But you see, Sharon never really paid much attention to anyone on the
Gymnastics team as though every breath she inhaled was full of superiority.
True, allot of my friends on the team were Cheerleading 'rejects' (as Sharon
liked to call it) but I never applied for the Cheerleading squad, so she 
couldn't count me amongst that group. Listen to me! I sound like Sharon now, 
'That Group' is some of my best friends too.
 
Why did I never apply for Cheerleading? I was encouraged to, but in this
town, who your parents know and how popular you were played a big
factor. Sharon's father is a big-wig executive within one of the largest
Corporations in the Country, there was little she didn't receive when asked
for. But even once you made the team, you had to know how to 'kiss ass'
and that I cannot tolerate, nor perform that very well...has something to do
with self-respect and dignity, I like those two qualities and think I do a good
job of hanging onto them :)
 
So I'm going to swing the spotlight on me for a moment, because it was in
High School that I discovered the weight room...specifically weight lifting.
Now, just to give you an idea of how spoiled our school was, the girls had
their own exercise room, separate from the guys, how pampered is that?
But to be honest, I would rather have worked out with the guys. Aside from
the annoying 'hit up' for dates issue (which I can deal with), the guys in my
school seemed more focused on going in and working out. On the girl's
side...*sigh*...the weight room was nothing more then a chatter-box/social-
club for most of the girls to lounge around in, never mind that lifting was
actually part of our training routine, but you would never know that if you
walked in there. Unless you were the Coach and then suddenly all the girls
were grunting and sweating...pathetic...but the Coach new what they were
up to, she would just smirk knowingly when she would walk in.
 
Running, swimming, gymnastics, they all came natural to me...I was
fearless...and when I started to curl weights I was shocked to see my body
respond. But I'll be honest, I really held back for awhile because I was going
thru some personal issues at that time...I was being pulled in a million
directions it seemed; Parents, Teachers, and boys. Picking up those weights
meant going down a road that would only further separate me from the
'image' my mother had for me. That's right 'FOR ME', she wanted to mold
me into this girly-girl dressed all in pink *hack**cough**barf* and I knew if I
started coming home all toned-up from lifting she would go berserk!
 
And she did, go berserk that is.
 
Which means that 'Yes', I started lifting...but I didn't bulk up right 
away...that took some more time, initially I was just enthralled with the way my 
body was responding to the simplest of routines! It was...well...it was like as 
I started to map out my lifting schedule (with help from my coach) I likened it
to creating a sculpture...and it was my body! MINE! I was so thrilled! My
breasts shrank some, but not nearly as much as I was hoping, I knew/know
girls who just about lost all of their boobs after they started lifting; what I
wouldn't give (give up more like it) to have that problem. Having these
knockers swinging around is no fun folks! 'D' Size, but still...annoying at
times...and beneficial in other ways :) Amazing what a nice pair of breasts
will do for you!
 
Things came to a head one day near the end of the school year when I was
standing in my room, back to the door, I had just had taken my shirt off and
was about to unhook my bra when I heard my mother burst into tears. I
spun around and she was crying! I must admit, I had just come from lifting
so I was still all pumped up and sweating. I really wasn't all that big then as 
I had just started, I mean I don't know....I guess my Mom hadn't seen me
without a shirt on for a couple of months if you can believe that so she was
just shocked. I think my Mom had some of that 'Sharon' Drama energy, she
was constantly harassing me about crap like...'Are you on Steroids?' , 'Why
are you exercising so much Corbin? It's not normal!'
 
"But Mom," I would say, "I'm gaining weight not loosing it!" Gheesh, she
could never understand that...thank god that was then and this is now! I
remember she drove me to the Dr. once and even the Dr. had a hard time
convincing her I was in phenomenal shape, better then any other girl he's
ever examined. Don't get me wrong, I know my mom was concerned and I
love her for that...but gheesh, talk about overbearing sometimes.
 
Well now, let's get back on track with that day in the gym when Sharon and I
first met.
 
Sharon disappeared into the locker room, (another annoying fact! The
Cheerleaders had finagled their way to obtaining a whole row of lockers side
by side, and they were the best lockers in the girl's room. This was another
stunt that really ticked off allot of other girls in the school.) I recall a few
times that I walked into the locker room and would observe Sharon
meticulously laying out her clothes, taking her own sweet time, and taking up
as much room as she damn well pleased. This often pushed the envelope on
a few confrontations in our school, and that is exactly how Sharon and I
met, when things almost came to blows...you'll see... :)
 
 



  
My_High_School_Years_Part_1