My Story 29
By Corbin
How life tests the endurance, patience, and sometimes faith of one young woman.

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"When it comes to staying young, a mind-lift beats a face-lift any day." 
-Marty Bucella

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This society is going thru an age crises. I watch in horror at how people line 
up to get plastic surgery, you just have to look around and see how men and 
women are desperate to roll back the years. My primary concern isn't with the 
vanity of it, no my problem is this obsession with erasing history, removing 
the scars of our past in an attempt to stay young for tomorrow. When I look in 
the mirror, or wash my body I see the scars from where I fell off my bike, or 
from playing soccer, and even a few from a couple of fights. These are a 
part of who I am and as the years take their toll on my body, that too will 
become a part of who I am, just as much a reflection on how well I took 
care of my skin when I was younger. When you watch TV, nobody has any wrinkles 
or lines on their face, everything is grossly pulled tight, it's nasty, and 
gross.

**********

Subconsciously I think I may have some anti-social issues :)
 
I was in Dick's Sporting Goods yesterday, just browsing when I passed a long 
rack of Aluminum baseball bats. I never knew there were so many different 
styles, shapes and sizes. I also had this strange desire to pick up one of 
those bats and beat the crap out of some inanimate object, you know just to 
vent. Maybe I have some suppressed anger issues? So anyway, there I am holding 
this bat like some dummy when I get a vibe someone is looking at me, just over 
my right shoulder. So being the ever discrete person that I am, I jerk my head 
to the right to see who it might be, expecting some guy or guys to be lurking 
around. I was awkwardly shocked to see this very attractive brunette picking 
thru some jogging shorts across the aisle way, I have to say that yes, she was 
very, very attractive. So I'm fumbling to put the bat away and glance back over 
at her as looks up at me and gives a lingering smile. So what do I do? I blush 
like some idiot and smile back, now I'm fumbling some more to put that stupid 
bat back on the rack and now I want to beat myself over the head with it. I just 
kind of slink away feeling embarrassed at the fact I had even flirted a little 
with her, checking her out a little bit as well as we kept exchanging glances 
and some awkward hellos. 'You look really fit!' She even said to me and that's 
when I knew I had to get the hell out of there, I was all thumbs and 
tripping over my own feet. Gheesh like some stupid shy school girl, besides 
I'm involved with someone! So I just head for the exit because I don't normally 
act like this, maybe I was flattered but so what, I see lots of attractive 
women and men walking around, but every once in a rare moment I make this 
unspoken connection with someone that leaves me feeling flustered and at a loss 
for words. That's exactly what was happening back in that store and I needed to 
put some distance between me and that girl less I fall into temptation. It's 
happened with guys too just so you know, and it kind of screws with me 
for awhile to have my body firing off responses to both sexes, but I just go 
with it and don't worry anymore :) 

As I was now hustling my way out of the store, I passed a section with all of 
their exercise equipment all nicely spread out on display. Amongst the shiny 
displays I saw something called the 'Ab Recliner', that's right, my eyes could 
not believe it, the ultimate Ab exercise for the laziest people in our society. 
An exercise machine, cleverly disguised as a recliner, so you fat asses can sit 
back, drink your beer, watch TV and work those Abs PATHETIC! 

"Geee I don't know why I can't get rid of this tire around my waist?"

Hmm, I have an answer, because it takes hard work! And it's easy putting off 
hard work.

**********

I got out of College and jumped right into the corporate world, but that was 
just a means to an end, which was to pay my gym membership. And I won't mention 
the name of my gym either.

Anyway, back on my favorite topic; I was wearing a lightweight jacket and long 
sweats during my workout. It helped to keep the cool air, pumped in from the 
overhead vents from zapping the moisture off my skin, thus cooling down my body 
and muscles faster then I would like.  But that day was a little different, the 
A/C was partially on the fritz and so off came the jacket and sweat pants. 
Even with the overhead fans turned on, the lack of cooling air meant that the 
entire gym had become its own sauna, reeking of bodily sweat. I could only smile 
as I watched the 'can't hack it' clientele enter, do an about face and exit; All 
the while, Management profusely apologizing, promising "Soon, very soon" the A/C 
system would be back online. I was truly amused at watching Mike curse the 
repair company for their lack of promptness in getting the system back up and 
working; with only one unit now functioning on top of the building, it was doing 
an inadequate job of cooling the large structure. (Mike is the owner of this 
nice little gym I go to.)

After an hour and a half I felt like I had stepped out of a hot shower and right 
into a sauna; My tight, thigh length shorts and sports bra were soaked, so much 
that they seemed to ooze perspiration on their own.  Dropping to my knees with 
my back to 'the machine' I looked over head, my arms reached skyward and grasped 
the upside down 'V' shaped handles, tilting my head back down as I pulled the 
weights, slowly traveling down until the handle barely brushed the back of my 
neck.  I would sometimes curl until tears fell from my eyes, now that's a burn 
baby! Each time my forehead came close to touching the floor, I would hold the 
position for a few seconds, hunched over, as my arms and stomach muscles burned 
with greater intensity until I slowly sat back up.  Over and over I repeated the 
movement, god it was awesome, like a small rain shower the sweat was pouring off 
my head. I stopped periodically to replenish the quickly depleting bodily fluids 
with a drink, while taking the appropriate breaks to stretch.

I was tuning everyone out, especially a group of guys that didn't seem to have 
anything else better to do then 'gawk' in my direction. I guess I rarely 
stripped down to shorts and workout bra, but it was damn hot, god it was hot...I 
mean it was one of those sweats that had a thick sheen of perspiration covering 
every inch of my skin. But with the help of tiny headphones, blaring "Alive" by 
P.O.D. into my ear canals, the music was like an added adrenaline rush thru my 
veins and muscles, until I caught sight of the owner Mike walking in my 
direction. 'Oh dammit, not now.' I groaned and lowered my head while playing 
with several wet strands, 'Here comes Mr. Pain-in-my-ass.'

Now I didn't really need to explain that little event above, but I guess it 
sticks out in my mind because it happened right before a moment when Mike 
approached me with an offer. You see, Mike had been dropping hints for months 
now, looking to sponsor a girl(s) in a Female Fitness competition and/or Amateur 
Body Building competition. I would just nod my head silently when he talked in 
great length about it, but I never thought he would come right out and ask me, I 
just assumed he would wait and see if I wanted to volunteer. While the thought 
of competing gave me a thrill and Mike's eagerness to promote me boosted my 
confidence higher then it had ever been lifted, I already knew that deep down in 
side I saw myself rejecting it. I mean, the fitness competition sounded nice, 
but I wasn't sure, and anytime my gut hesitates, that is a sure sign to back off 
of something. As for the body building competition, I knew for sure that I did 
not want to get THAT cut, although Mike was dropping hints that I wasn't that 
far away from competition material right now. But the real reason for not 
getting involved in either was more personal, for as much time and effort as I 
had put into working out, along with all the compliments men and women paid me, 
I suffer from severe shyness sometimes. The thought of wearing some of those 
skimpy uniforms was just too much to contemplate, and 'In front of an audience?' 
my anxious mind would warn me, 'no freaking way!'. I mean, how could I pose on a 
stage when my hands are covering my face, because I wouldn't be able to look out 
at the people.

(Well, that was kind of long winded, but this is really the beginning of my 
transition from College into the Workforce. So, well see how it goes.)


  
29_My_Story