The Thoroughly Disreputable Incest Digest
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Issue 11

SPOILER: Two very bad experiences recounted in this issue.
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I first spied on my mom and dad by accident.  I was about ten I 
guess, just old enough to know "of fucking" but not old enough to 
know much about it.  Still, I was aware that I was very horny, a 
kind of free floating sexual arousal and with no way to deal with it.

I'd climbed a tree in front of our house with, as I recall it, no
intention of spying of my parents.  A large and comfortable limb
placed me just outside a second story window, my parents'
bedroom, on a weekend afternoon as they were "making love."
Actually, what I saw was them fucking.  I'm more surprised now,
as most children are by their parents, at their versatility.  My
mom sucked my dad's cock, and he her pussy. He fucked her from
the front and from the back.  Most erotic, he fucked her ass
after she'd presented herself on all fours, reaching around to
pull her ass cheeks apart in invitation.  Later, she lay back,
legs spread, and as they were talking, she idly masturbated,
initially slowly and then with increasing need and vigor.

That started it for me.  I was driven by bottomless erotic urges
and my mom, bless her soul, was driven by her own gad flies, for
my father as a merchant seaman and gone most of the time.  I
gecame aware of my mother's increasing and at times, blatant
sewuality.  I used every opportunity to watch her, to spy on her.
I watched her dress and undress, sometimes with me there
(pretending I wasn't paying attention!), and I watched her pee,
sometimes in the toilet but more often in the kitchen sink, for
it was more convenient.

I contrived to hug her and feel her breasts.  To lie on the floor
when she was reading, for her legs would often drift apart and
I'd have an excellent view between her thighs.  It seemed the
only time she wore underpants was when she was menstruating.

Had it not been for an untimely death at a young age, I suspect
we would have drifted into an incestuous affair, for she was
becoming increasingly provocative with me.  I've never forgotten
those memories and often use them to masturbate by.  It remains
hot.
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You asked if anyone had seen pictures.  When I was 17 I found
my parents' private photo box.  It was all polaroids mostly
of my mom nude and posing on the bed.  My dad was in some
too.  I took some of them to a friend for copying and let
him keep a copy.  There were two funny things about this.
I let him kkeep copies and so I knew he was jerking off to
pictures of my mother.  And he knew I was jerking off to
pictures of my mother.  Sort of partners in crime.  Later
on he paid me back with pictures of his wife, hot ones
with dildos and vegetables!  I am married now but I still
keep those pics of my mom (well hid of course).  Think I
will go get them right now.

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yes i have... and from what i've read it is apparently the rarest 
of incest incidences... it was my mother... she died of cancer on 
sept 4/1996... this is probably a sting of some sort... but if you 
are collecting information for some higher purpose then i would be 
glad to assist you... and no... i'm not some nut... .i am 50 years 
old... my life was destroyed by this... there is'nt a single person 
on the planet who cares a diddly fucking shit in any way other then 
to profit from my telling of my experience... .you included or 
especially.

[This information is collected only for the purpose of posting
the next installment of these surveys on Usenet.  There is no
purpose, law enforcement, academic, or otherwise, other than
my own interest sparked by my own experiences.  -- Ed.]
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[SPOILER: sad ending]

Follow up from above poster.

I suppose you get a lot of bullshit stories on this subject.
Here's a true one.

As i entered puberty my mother would take showers and "discover"
she did'nt have a bath towel. So she'd yell for me to bring her
one. I'd go to her door, announce myself, she'd open the door and
stand back far enough that I had to reach out to her with the
towel.  Every time I did this she would drop whatever she had
been clutching to hide her nakedness and stand there totally
nude...both of us staring at the other. It happened so often I
called it "the game".  As I grew older I interpreted it
(correctly) that she was beckoning me to have sexual intercourse
with her.  In those days (1950s) being called a "motherfucker"
was the worst insult imaginable.   What my mother did made me
view myself as a potential or wannabe motherfucker.  I moved away
from home when I turned eighteen.

At twenty eight..my dad died and I returned home for awhile to
comfort Mom. Less then a week after returning home I was laying
in bed late one night half asleep.    Mom gently pushed my
bedroom door open.  i lay there in the dimly- lit room....while
she tip-toed around my bed and sat on the bed.    There was some
hesitation...I saw her make small furtive movements...and then
felt her hand gently grasp my penis....within moments the
pressure increased and she grasped my penis firmly.    She then
masturbated me.   As soon as she left my room and closed the door
I reached around behind me and turned on the light attached to
the headboard.   I had been fully awake (to put it mildly) during
the entire incident. I remember telling myself to remember in
vivid detail what had just happened because I suspected that a
part of me would try to make it go away.  I moved out of mom's
house the next morning and returned to nurse her when she was
diagnosed with breast cancer in 1993. Mom died sept 4,1994.

I assume you're collecting these stories to excite yourself.  You
probably read these and masturbate. I am presently involved in
starting a new company called ----well,never mind.  Anyhow,the
products are incest-fantasy-oriented.  There is a tremendous
market for this kind of thing but common decency dictates that
the difference be made clear between fantasy and reality.  One is
harmless...the other is devestating.....!!!                 
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[SPOILER: This is the saddest story I've received.  No others
follow, you may skip the rest of the post if you like.]


This story is true, it's my own.

My name is Karin and I'm a 24 years old student of business,
daughter of a japanese father and a german mother. We live in
germany. I once had a sister, but not anymore.

I'm writing this as a sort of self-therapy, because I am really
desperate.  I never wrote anything like this before, especially
not in english. I have only told this once to a very friendly
person, I met in a german MUD. He was quite understanding and
tried to cheer me up, but I never went into that mud again. I
hate myself for that, but I could not bear the strain of
"meeting" him again.

Please excuse any gramatical/spelling errors, and I might have
not always found the right words to describe my situation. Even
though my english is quite ok, I haven't practiced it for a long
time. Since I don't know the exact dialogue anymore, and I
wouldn't want to make anything up, I only write in passive voice.

.............

I thought I could never tell anyone about it, but it has been 9
years now. I was 15 bach then, and my sister Dorothea was 13. I
never thought of me as pretty, but rather as a lousy excuse for a
woman. Rather skinny, undeveloped and with a short haircut as I
preferred, I was quite often mistaken for a boy. As I hate to say
now, this often made me proud.

Doscha (as I called her) on the contrary was very appealing to the
eye. She had long, flowing black hair and a perfect physique. She
always was a cheerful, charming girl, laughing the whole day. At
least, I remember her that way.

She was very popular among our family and friends alike and I
hated her for that. Even though my parents noticed that she was
getting so much more attention than me, they could not close
themself off to her charms.

You see, my parents were extremely prude. I think I have never
seen my father naked and my mother only on two occasions. They
never told me about the birds and the bees and stuff. A friend at
school had to clear me up, and that was only short before my 15th
birthday! I found out with 11 years [of age] how to masturbate
with waterjets in public swimming-pools. I always thought I
invented something new, until I saw a boy of my age do it too.
Than I continoud to experiment with my hands..

I masturbated very often as this was one of the few things, that
made me happy. I found out that I delighted most in thinking
about how to socially disgrace my sister. I imagined how
satisfying it would be if my parents walked in on her while SHE
was masturbating... I always came heavily when I thought of that.

Than something even more ashaming came into my mind. What if she
was disgraced a lesbian?!? Or maybe even a lesbian who did it
with her own sister!!! I almost flipped out over that thought and
it became almost obsessive. During the next days I developed
thousands of ideas how to make love to her, and just about as
many sore spots...

I had already noticed that she was masturbating too, as she was
not the type who did it quietly. When I think back, I believe my
parents knew too, but they pretended not to notice anything that
even remotely had something to do with that.

When my parents were gone on holiday, bycicling with their
friends, as they still often do, I decided it was the time.

I told her a made up a story about a boy, I just met, and how
wonderful he was, that we kissed passionatly and how I was
dreaming about him... That did the trick. Only 15 minutes later,
I heard her in her room relieving herself. I noticed that she
locked her door after she went in, but there was another door
between her room and mine which couldn't be locked. Usually I
have a chair standing in front of that door, which opens into my
room, so she can't just walk in on me. Quietly i removed the
chair and opened the door just a tiny little bit. She was
kneeling on her bed, facing sideways to me. The way she did
herself was not unlike my own method, I noticed. Then I loudly
bumped the door open and stepped into her room.

She reacted as I hoped she would, she gave off a shriek turned
white pale. She cringed onto her bed, shivering and tears in her
eyes. I told her that I cought her red-handed and what would
happen if I told our parents and our friends. Besides, she was
obviously masturbating about my (imagined) boy-friend and that he
was mine and she stole him from me and had to be punished. She
was like butter in my hands! I never felt so superior to another.

I slowly appoached and caressed her hair while I started to
undress myself with my other hand.

............

I can't write what comes next, since I forgot all of the details,
but Doscha ended up having oral sex with me, which disgusted her,
but I just loved it. In fact, I loved it so much, I completely
forgot about taking pictures with the polaroid camera I borrowed
from my grandmother. But my fairest hint of giving away our
'secret' was enough for her to succomb to me.

We both changed a lot from this day on. She was extremely
introverted and sad and cried sometimes without any apparent
reason. she really suffered a lot. My parents took her to a
doctor when they came back, but she didn't tell anyone.

I, on the contrary, was suddenly energetic, cheerful and popular
with almost anybody. I was even elected vice-class-speaker a
couple of weeks later.

The following 2 months I made her lick me seven days a week and I
did her too, sometimes, when I felt like it.

Than one day, when I came back from school, my father was there,
which is rather unusual, since he is normally at work till late
afternoon. He was totally pale and I noticed, that he cried and
he told me that something happened to Doscha. We drove off to a
nearby hospital, and when we arrived there my mother was totally
lost in tears. She fell around the neck of my father and cried
continously. A nurse told me to be brave and that my sister had
just died of the injuries she recieved in a car accident in front
of her school.

Later I heard that it was almost as if she ran into the car on
purpose. The driver of the bus that ran over her was a
twenty-something year old guy. He came by our house 2 or 3 times.
He was so desperate because of the accident and wanted to help
us, but my parents sent him away. They didn't sue him or
anything, but he was in a bad shape nonetheless. I think the
police took away his license, or something like that.

To say that I felt as bad as I could would have been an
understatement. I dropped out of school half a year later and
pigged out almost 20 kg. I didn't leave home as I was wracked
with suffering.

Finally, I managed to get a hold of myself and returned to
evening-school and made it to the german 'fachhochschule' where I
still am.

I still have the feeling that I was a true monster,
psycholgically raping my own sister, day after day. I have never
been close to anyone else anymore, and masturbating doesn't make
me even remotely happy, so I stopped doing it.

I hope it helps if I can write this anonymously. It doesn't make
me feel any better though, but I believe if I can confess my sins
enough, I might even open myself up to a yet nonexisting friend
of mine.

.................

Well, I hope this has been of use to you. If you want to flame me
for what I did, just go ahaed. I can take it, I think.

Thank you for reading this.

Karin

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