A Review by Lee Vine

Kate and Me: Friendship Spilled Over by The Bear

M/f, Romance

Length: 8,600 words

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NOTES:

(1)  IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 THEN STOP READING NOW!!!!!
(2)  IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY DESCRIPTIONS OF NATURAL ACTS WHICH SOME 
PEOPLE CALL PLEASUREABLE BUT YOU REGARD AS NECESSARY FOR THE 
PERPETUATION OF THE HUMAN RACE THEN STOP READING NOW!!!!!!!
(3)  IF YOU AREN'T SURE IF EITHER (1) OR (2) APPLY TO YOU THEN STOP 
READING NOW!!!!

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Summary

Kate is the 16-year-old daughter of Art, Will's best friend.  One night
Art asks Will to drive Kate to a dance because he is not feeling so 
well.  They did not get along before that night, but before it is 
through Will and Kate are "friends for life".  After a period of 
friendship they jump to the "let's fuck like bunnies, cause no one's 
going to notice" stage of their relationship. Someone does notice.  
Lucky for Will and Kate it does not mean the end of their relationship.

Commentary

This was  a sweet romantic story.  The narrator is obviously a man who 
is deeply moved by emotion.  It was a good try.  The descriptions of 
sex did not resemble a Guinness Book of World Records entry.  The 
characters were likable in a sickly sweet sort of way.

Okay, enough is enough and too much is too much.  I could not get too 
into this story.  There was an overabundance of pronouns, e.g. she did 
this, then I said this, then she said that, then I did this, etc.

The writing style seemed to be an attempt at romance yet it was also 
very straight forward.  Maybe those two things are not mutually 
exclusive, but they did not work in this story.  My biggest problem was
that in its entirety it seemed a bit tried.  The narrator/author seemed
to have to tell the reader how he felt at all times instead of showing 
how he felt through his actions and letting the reader draw his or her 
own conclusions.

Rating

I give this story a 4 on a scale of 10.

