CRUSHED RIGHT BEFORE MY EYES!
17-Nov-98 17:52:58

Wow. It had been a while. But let me just tell you that I witnessed the most awesome crush scene yesterday here at the local mall. It's getting cold out and I guess the bugs are moving indoors for safety. Bad move!

I was sitting at a bench at the local shopping mall - actually a rather high end mall with really nice shops - you know the kind of place where you actually see women in high heels and nice clothes instead of combat boots and jeans.

Well, out of the corner of my eye I noticed something moving against the wall just under the display window of a store in front of where I was sitting. I looked closely and saw that it was this huge beetle. It was a greyish brown in colour, and it was moving real slowly. It probably stood an inch tall at the center of its shell. Just then I saw two women, nicely dressed, walking up toward the window to do some window shopping. They were a few feet away from the beetle at this point, but I just knew (or hoped) that they would notice.

One woman was blonde with tight fitting slacks and low heel pumps, and the other was dark haired with a short mini skirt, tights and high heels. I listened as they spoke and the one with dark hair was Hispanic - and very sexy. She was apparently quite wealthy; you could tell from her clothes and jewelry and the way she carried herself. They were both quite classy.

Just when they were about to walk away, and my hopes were going to be dashed, the blonde noticed the beetle and said to the other lady "Oh gosh, look what we have here" and pointed to the beetle. The dark haired lady said "Oh yes, we have had a few of those around the house the last couple of weeks. They are disgusting, aren't they?" I mean, they were just talking matter of factly with no real emotion. That's when all hell broke loose in a matter of speaking.

The blonde said "I'm going to step on it", and the other woman said "No, let me do it. I kill them all the time. The crunch might bother you if you're not used to it." With that she took two steps over to the insect and placed her right high heel squarely on top of the beetle and mashed donw on it. And let me tell you it did crunch. And ooze. The blonde said "that's not so bad, I could have done it." And then the woman with her foot on the bug began to apply all the pressure she could to the ball of her foot, and then twisted left and right two or three times. When she was finished she took her foot off of the bug and they both examined the remains. A large mound of what looked like melted vanilla ice cream with bits of grey stuff in it. They both looked at each other and kind of giggled and then walked off.
As they rounded the corner I heard the blonde say to the brunette, "I guess someone is going to have to clean that up".

Well, that was it. I hope I see some more things like that soon.

And if any of you ladies can relate to this; arguing with friends over who should step on a bug when you see one; I'd love to hear about it.