Fallen Angel
Chapter 4 
Week 3-Day 6!

I looked up, seeing my poncho hanging above my head, 
and turned looking for Sian Moc, but didn't see her.  
It wasn't raining any longer, why was I under the 
poncho?  I tried raising my arm to see what time it was 
but I couldn't raise it.  Damn my side was hurting so 
bad, what happened?  Why am I hurting like this?  I 
remember, the three VC, did I kill them or did they 
kill me?  Fuck!  My side hurts.  I have to get out of 
here. 
I strained to sit up but fell back.  Rolling onto my 
side, I attempted again, managing to sit up.  I looked 
around for Sian Moc but again I didn't see her.  She 
had torn a blanket and wrapped it around my rib cage, 
almost to tight to breathe.  I must have been shot on 
my left side because the most pain was felt there. 
"Sian Moc!"  I tried shouting, but my voice was weak.  
"Sian Moc!  Sian Moc! 
I leaned forward, trying to lift myself and fell on my 
right side. 
"Sian Moc," I said, just saying her name to myself and 
then passed out. 
I awakened feeling hands on my body but it took a 
minute for my vision to clear.  When I could see, she 
was crying while washing my wound. 
"How long have we been here?" 
"Brian, you scared me.  I thought you were going to 
die," she said.  I surprised her when I spoke. 
"How long?" 
"Two days.  You shouldn't talk.  Be quiet," she 
demanded. 
"Where have you been?" 
"I have been busy, hush, and don't talk!  Save your 
strength." 
"Are we safe?" 
-!SLAP!- She popped me on the cheek. 
I said for you to shut up!  ___ I am so sorry," she 
said, putting her blood stained hands to her face, 
realizing what she had done. 
I remained quiet, only so she wouldn't cry.  She leaned 
back over me, washing my wound, and then wrapped it 
with another part of her blanket.  I watched her as she 
walked to a puddle and washed the blood stained rags, 
ringing them out.  For hours, until it was dark, I lay 
motionless, watching her every move, sometimes 
wondering how she withstood all the horrifying acts 
performed against her.  Sometimes she would catch me 
staring and give me a quick smile or a look, letting me 
know she was taking care of me. 
Week 3-Day 7!
"Sian Moc!  I looked around.  Sian Moc!  Damn you 
woman." 
I was stiff and the pain was almost unbearable.  I 
rolled, turned in almost every position to see if that 
would stop the pain, without success.  There was no 
sense in trying to get up so I just lay there trying to 
occupy my mind to thwart it. 
I knew we were in deep shit with no raft.  I was 
useless, and totally dependent on her.  But, where the 
hell was she?  Over an hour had passed when she came 
walking up, almost sneaking and walked up to me.  I had 
closed my eyes, I think so I wouldn't blurt something 
stupid like, "Where the fuck were you."  She was 
probably doing something that was necessary for our 
survival, no doubt.  I felt her hand touch my neck, 
obviously checking to see if I remained alive.  The 
last thing I could afford was to piss her off, being my 
only lifeline. 
I opened my eyes, looking at her.  She was using my 
knife, chopping what looked like berries and roots. 
"Where the hell have you been?"  I asked.  She froze a 
second but didn't look at me. 
She didn't answer and didn't even acknowledge I had 
spoken. 
"You can't go off and not let me know where you're 
going.  What if something were to happen to you?  What 
if soldiers saw you while you were walking around?  Say 
something, you can't ignore me forever." 
After dicing the berries and roots, she scooted over in 
front of me, dipped her finger, and held it to my 
mouth.  I held my mouth shut not taking any. 
"You take a bite first.  I think you're trying to 
poison me."  I stated, angrily because she didn't 
answer. 
She sat the small metal plate down in front of me and 
scooted away.  The berries remained on her fingers and 
without thinking; she raised her fingers to her mouth 
and stopped, catching herself.  Quickly she looked to 
see if I was watching and held her fingers in front of 
her mouth.  We were at a stalemate, I wanted her to 
taste it and she wanted to taste it but wasn't sure if 
I would win if she did.  Finally, she put her fingers 
in her mouth and I began laughing.  She sulked for a 
second and then began laughing and picked up a small 
stick throwing it at me.  I reached to block it and 
pain shot through my body.  She threw her hands up to 
her face, realizing what she had done and scooted 
quickly to help me.  I reached my hand behind her neck, 
pulling her mouth to mine and held us together for 
thirty seconds then turned loose.  She slowly pulled 
away and sat on her knees looking at me. 
In a brief second, I realized I was jealous of her 
time.  I wanted her near me every second of the day, if 
only to look at her, or just to have someone near me to 
keep me from feeling lonely. 
"I'm sorry, I was angry because I felt alone, because 
you weren't with me.  Please forgive me." 
"Sometime I don't understand you." 
"I know.  I feel helpless.  Sometimes, well, maybe 
every time a man feels helpless he gets angry and 
sometimes takes it out on then ones he ___cares about. 
"Do you care about me?" 
I hesitated, thinking how I should answer.  "Very 
 Much." 
She smiled, and then scooted over, getting the plate 
and proceeded finger feeding me.  While she fed me, I 
thought, I couldn't say that I loved her because I didn't 
really know myself.  I knew I was beginning to feel 
for her in a way that had many of the symptoms.  
Nevertheless, why say it when in all likelihood, I 
would end up going my way and she hers. 
"Sian Moc, I need to get up.  I can't just lay here 
hoping I'll get well enough to travel.  I need to try.  
Help me up." 
"You will fall down and hurt yourself." 
"I've got to try." 
She sat down the empty plate and put her hand under my 
right arm.  I struggled, but managed to get to my feet 
and take a few steps before my knees buckled.  She 
helped me back under the poncho. 
"I remember seeing John Wayne, Humphrey Bogart, and a 
hundred more getting shot and in the same day, put 
their arm in a sling and still manage to save the 
world, why can't I?" 
"Who are the people you talk about?"  She asked, with a 
curious look on her face. 
"Movie stars, all make believe." 
"Sometime I will go to the movies.  A boy I knew in the 
embassy asked me many times to go see a movie but I 
would tell him no.  I have to work and go to school, 
that I do not have time.  He was a very cute boy and 
very nice.  His name was Richard." 
"Sian Moc lets talk about something else." 
She looked at me with a certain expression.  I think 
she detected a little jealousy and smiled. 
"You must remain quiet." 
"I can't, I have to talk or do something to take my 
mind off of the pain." 
"Very well.  Tell me about your home." 
I clinched my side for a brief second, feeling a sharp 
pain, and then relaxed. 
"Are you okay?" 
"Yes." 
"Well, if you must talk, tell me about you, your home, 
and why you came here." 
"My home is nothing like here, Vietnam that is," I 
began saying. 
She moved directly in front of my face leaned with her 
hands on her knees and looks at me as when children do 
when they watch someone telling a ghost story.  Her 
eyes were fixated on mine, in anticipation. 
My father's parents died and left him a small farmhouse 
and three hundred and twenty acres about sixty miles 
outside of Atlanta Georgia.  It remained empty for 
years while my father remained in the Marine Corp.  A 
group of developers contacted my father, wanting to buy 
and develop it into a subdivision.  He sold it to them 
but kept five acres for him, to build on when he 
retired.  Three years before his retirement, he built 
my mother a very nice home, one like she had always 
dreamed.  Six months after it was finished, he received 
orders for Vietnam. 
I was living in the dorm at Georgia Tech studying for 
my degree when Mother moved in her new home to live 
while my father came here.  He was killed, leaving my 
mother devastated.  I moved in with her, my sister 
Karen and Steven, my brother.  I finished school, got 
my degree, and was drafted.  I signed up for officers 
training to be a pilot and here I am. 
"Your father was killed here?  I am so sorry." 
"Don't feel guilty, it wasn't your fault." 
"You should rest now, to heal.  I found enough berries 
to last only two days, and then we must go.  This will 
help you to sleep."  She explained, putting a small 
root up to my lips. 
"What is it?" 
"I found small flower, called Ti-Ti flower, it will 
help take away the pain and help you to sleep.  If you 
chew on it, you will fall asleep soon." 
Trustingly, I opened my mouth as she placed it on my 
tongue. 
"Chew it," she said, moving her mouth, instructing me 
what to do.  
  
Week 4-Day 2!

A steady, but not a hard rain fell as I awoke with 
droplets splattering on my face.  It was pitch black; I 
moved my head to avoid the annoying drips, and realized 
Sian Moc was curled with her back against me as I lay 
facing her.  She held my hand as my arm draped over 
her.  I didn't want to awaken her, knowing she needed 
rest as much as I.  The pain was minimal, I remembered 
what she said about the root, but I knew if I moved it 
would aggravate it, so I lay still, waiting for the sun 
to rise. 
I was in my third day of my thirty-day leave having 
completed my first tour.  I had reserved us a suite for 
a week in The Ritz Carlton Boston.  I arrived in Boston 
this morning, calling Carol from the airport.  She 
excused herself from classes that day to spend it with 
me.  I had taken a cab and waited for her in the lobby 
of the hotel, anticipating a long awaited day of sexual 
recreation. 
I hadn't mentioned the fact that I was to return for a 
second tour and I wasn't sure when to break that news 
to her.  I was in uniform, obvious for her to spot when 
she entered but I sat just seated behind a column with 
plants surrounding it.  There she was coming in the 
entrance, peering around, searching for me. 
Her hair was different, the same sexy golden blonde but 
much longer down near her breasts.  However, it 
remained straight and beautiful.  She was wearing a 
black turtleneck sweater with a black mini-skirt and 
high heels.  Her walk hadn't changed, one of a refined 
lady, not smug but of sophistication.  Each step she 
neared, I felt my heart almost skipping a beat, holding 
myself back from approaching her, allowing me time to 
get accustomed again to her infinite radiance.  
  
"Still the essence of beauty," I stated, as she almost 
walked by, turning her head quickly. 
Tears began flowing from her eyes as she tried 
restraining them.  We walked to one another embracing, 
as she released her emotions.  It felt so wonderful 
holding her again; I was near shedding tears myself. 
"God I love and missed you so much," I stated, 
squeezing her tightly, and kissing her. 
She tried responding but was choked, holding our lips 
together. 
"Don't you ever go away like that again.” She finally 
managed to say.  It sounded better than I love you.  
However there remained the task of informing her, which 
could wait until later, so as not to spoil the moment. 
"Did you bring luggage, enough for a week?  I want you 
every minute your not in classes." 
"The porter is attending to it, and I may not attend 
classes the remainder of the week.  I want you all to 
myself for seven days," she replied, putting her arms 
around my waist. 
  She released me quickly, taking a step back.  "You 
look so wonderful in your uniform.  Your hair looks 
cute short too, and I always will love looking into 
those dark blue eyes," she stated, lunging her lips to 
mine. 
We stood and kissed in the lobby for several minutes 
until I held the keys up, dangling them.  "You will 
never forget this week, as long as you live," I stated. 
"I have a feeling you won't either." 
The porter stood nearby with our luggage, waiting for 
us to go up.  We went up and I tipped him after 
entering the suite.  I stood gazing upon her, 
reminiscing years in the past that we had made love 
during holidays and school breaks.  There was never 
enough time to tell her how much I was in love with 
her, she relating the same feeling to me. 
She walked to the bed and stood beside it, waiting for 
me to walk over.  Reaching under the hem of her 
sweater, she pulled it over her head and removed it, 
and proceeded unzipping her skirt, sliding it until it 
lay on the floor.  Reaching to her back, she unhooked 
her bra and let it fall, and then stood, allowing me to 
stare at her body. 
I walked slowly toward her, removing my uniform, 
throwing something to the floor with each couple of 
steps until I stood before her nude, allowing her to 
stare at my body. 
"I have to return to Vietnam for another tour," I 
whispered, looking into her eyes. 
Her expression changed, to one of fear.  "What are you 
saying?" she asked, her lips trembling. 
"I have opted for another tour, allowing me an early 
out when I return home," I explained, waiting for the 
response I had anticipated. 
She fell back on the bed; her countenance was blank, as 
she seemed in a trance. 
Week 4-Day 4!
I awakened again, having moved my head under the same 
droplets.  It was light, the rain was reduced to a 
drizzle, and Sian Moc remained nestled against my 
front.  As were mine, her silk clothes were damp as I 
slid my hand along her hip, feeling the shape of her 
body.  This stirred a little excitement within me but I 
knew there was no chance of taking advantage of our 
closeness.  However, I continued caressing her just the 
same, imagining I could.  Surprising me, she took my 
hand and placed it between the opening of her silk top 
and on her breast. 
"That should help you," she said, removing her hand 
from mine, allowing my hand to roam freely. 
I kissed the back of her head, and proceeded caressing 
each of her breasts.  She shifted slightly, allowing me 
to easily touch the one against the ground. 
"That few hours of sleep seemed to have given me a 
little energy," I said teasingly. 
She giggled.  "You slept more than one day," she 
replied, continuing to giggle. 
"Really!  No wonder I feel rested," I said, squeezing 
her breast. 
"You wish me to take my clothes off?" 
"I do, but not today.  The pain has mostly gone away 
and I know it would come back if you did," I said, 
laughing a little. 
She turned, lying on her back looking into my eyes.  
"Do you want to try walking today?  We must leave soon.  
I am afraid to go too far looking for food.  We have 
enough for today, but we must go," she explained with a 
look of concern. 
"Give me a few more minutes to gather a little more 
strength," I answered, caressing her breast. 
"Take all the time you need," she replied, lifting her 
chest. 
I pleased myself another few minutes and then suggested 
we get up.  I lay while she prepared breakfast, berries 
and roots.  It was 0935 and there remained a light 
drizzle as she fed me under the poncho.  I felt as if I 
could feed myself but I was enjoying her making a fuss 
over me. 
She helped me up to sit on a log while she folded the 
poncho and blankets, preparing to leave. 
"Sian Moc," I said as she turned to look at me. 
"I ah … I need." 
"What do you want to say?" 
"I have to go to the bathroom," I stated feeling 
embarrassed. 
She smiled and stepped over in front of me.  "Stand 
 up," she said, helping me. 
She undid my flight suit and pulled it down to my 
ankles.  "Now sit down," she demanded, walking behind 
me, holding my shoulders so I would not fall backwards. 
I was so embarrassed but I relieved myself off and on 
for five minutes.  Without hesitation, she gathered a 
handful of leaves and cleaned me, and took one of the 
wet portions of blanket used to wrap my side and 
finished cleaning me.  I stood up as she dressed me and 
sat back down as she rinsed the soiled cloth with soap 
in the puddle. 
She had placed everything in one spot and began 
stirring and arranging everything as it was before, 
making it difficult to tell that we had been here.  
That was very smart, I thought.  She began putting the 
bandoleers over shoulders, along with our bedrolls, and 
both rifles, and walked over to me and took my hand.  I 
reached for the rifles and she grabbed my hand. 
"Our lives depend on you getting well, I will do as I 
must," she stated, helping me up. 
I was walking slowly and hurt so badly, but I would 
look at her carrying everything and gather enough 
strength to take another step.  After an hour and a 
half, I had to stop, and rest, sitting on a large 
bolder. 
"Do you want to stop for a while," she asked. 
"Give me just a minute to catch my breath.  I can't see 
it but it feels like sweat or blood running down my 
side." 
She walked over, setting the rifles down and opened my 
flight suit and looked at my side. 
"You are bleeding again.  We must go there and rest," 
she stated, pointing into the thicket. 
"I believe your American English is getting worse.  It's 
'We must go 'over' there and rest," I said, teasing her. 
If-I-understood-you-correctly, you-majored-in- 
engineering, -and-not-grammar," she replied, returning 
my tease. 
We both giggled as she picked up the weapons and helped 
me into the undergrowth, going in about twenty meters. 
"This is a very good spot, and private," I said after 
she had helped me sit down with my back against a tree.  
I had my hand around her knee as she was removing the 
rifles from her shoulder.  She looked down at me with a 
smile while removing the bandoleers.  I slightly tugged 
on her loose pants, pulling them partially down, 
exposing the top portion of her pubic hair.  Saying 
nothing, she began undoing her top.  I was only teasing 
her but the excitement I suddenly felt kept me from 
stopping her.  She removed it along with her pants, and 
stood nude before me.  It happened so quick I was taken 
back, not knowing what to do and not knowing if I could 
do anything. 
Excitement filled my body, and I wanted her so much.  I 
had forgotten about my side as I gazed upon her nudity.  
She stepped forward and stood less than an arms length of 
my face.  I reached my hands out, touching her hips, 
moving my hands the length of her thighs and then 
sliding them inside.  She placed her hands on the tree 
above my head and opened her legs.  I slid my right 
hand up her thigh, stopping at the thick hair covering 
her mound, seeing a glisten of moisture in her slit.  
Slowly I glided my finger its length, gathering 
moisture and then slowly slid my finger into her, 
touching the softness within. 
"Touch me, touch me inside Brian," she moaned, slowly 
rocking her hips against my hand.  Her wetness now 
covered my knuckles, as I probed deeper into her.  She 
began forcing herself against my hand as I felt her 
cunt opening begin to give way to my fist. 
I pull my hand away, not understanding her.  Was she 
doing this because she thought all men wanted this, was 
she truly excited and wanted me to do it, could she 
possibly enjoy that after all that has happened to her?  
I was more than willing to do it, but I had to know she 
took pleasure from me doing it. 
"Brian," she said, reaching for my hand. 
"No, Sian Moc," I said, taking her wrist and pulling 
her down in front of me. 
"Why Brian, do you not want to do this?" 
"Sian Moc, I can't," I said, as the thought of Yam Nah 
allowing me to do it, and what happened to Lin filled 
my head. 
I had never imagined anything like this before then.  
The thought of it stirred excitement within me, but the 
suffering that I saw it bring was overbearing.  I 
couldn't bring myself to do it again, not right now 
anyway. 
"Are you displeased with me?" 
"She, asking that question, made me angry." 
"I don't understand Brian, if you are angry with me 
tell me what to do." 
"You are not a slave to me!  Why does it always have to 
be what pleases me?" 
"What would you have me to do?  I will do anything you 
want," she stated. 
"That is what I'm talking about.  Why are you always 
trying to please me?  Why don't you do something that 
pleases you?  I am not Colonel Shu, and I am not any of 
the VC that took advantage of you," I tried explaining, 
being flustered. 
She put her hands to her face and fell into my lap 
crying.  I didn't know what to say or do.  I wanted it 
to be real between us, but how could I know with all 
that had happened to her.  Finally, I placed my hands 
on her shoulders and rubbed them. 
She looked up at me, crying, and asked, "Will you help 
me to understand why you are angry with me?" 
I thought for an instant how to explain, and chuckled 
to myself. 
"This is not funny!" she scolded, and began to get up. 
I held onto her, and said, "I was only laughing at the 
example I was going to give you, please sit down." 
She did as I asked and I began giving my example. 
"If you entered a village and every time you saw me, I 
was being beaten hard with sticks by the women of the 
village, and each time they struck me, I would laugh, 
louder and louder with each strike.  Would you soon 
join in because I was enjoying it so much? 
"No, because you were not enjoying it.  You were too 
proud to cry." 
"Very good answer.  You could not have enjoyed it when 
Colonel Shu did that to you so why would I do it.  
Because you think that men like it, that answer is not 
good enough," I explained. 
"When this happen to me before, I hated it and cried, 
and it hurt so bad.  When you touch my body, I love it 
because you are gentle.  A few minutes ago when you 
touch me here," she said, putting her hand between her 
legs, and continued, "It felt so wonderful and it did 
not hurt, I wanted to feel you inside of me," she said, 
clasping my hands. 
"I believe you, but I will need some time to grow 
accustomed to that." 
"I understand," she replied. 
She opened my jumper and looked at my side. 
"The bleeding has stopped again, but I should clean 
 it," she stated as her eyes slightly squinched. 
I hated to hear her say that, because pulling the 
bandage away with the dried blood hurt almost as bad 
as the wound. 
She stood to get some clean cloths. 
"Sian Moc," I said.  She stood still as I looked over 
her.  "I'm too far gone, I have to have you now." 
She misunderstood what I meant.  "You are not going to 
die now." 
"I didn't mean it that way.  I meant that I am so horny 
that I have got to have you," I explained and she 
laughed. 
"We will remove your clothes and clean your wound, 
and then we will see if you are horny," she replied, 
teasingly. 
The temperature felt 80 degrees and it wasn't raining 
now but it looked as if it would start anytime.  She 
rolled out one of the blankets, after feeling which 
might be dryer.  She said something in Vietnamese, 
seeming frustrated that nothing was dry.  I ran my hand 
along the blanket and I think I understood by her 
actions, so didn't ask her what she had said. 
"Move over here, on the blanket," she said, almost 
snapping at me. 
I sat still and didn't move, but only smiled, looking 
at her face. 
"Are you going to be difficult?"  She asked, waiting. 
"I was just wondering what your mother and father look 
like." 
"And why are you thinking of that?" 
"Because, you are so beautiful," I stated, causing her 
to blush and dip her head. 
I quickly glanced over her nude body and back to her 
face, thinking, being a beautiful girl in a country at 
war where the laws were ignored had its downside.  All 
of the young girls in the village were exceptionally 
beautiful.  Most were probably not missed because of 
the ethnic makeup of their parents.  Still, what would 
compel someone to abuse another human being, for 
whatever reason?  Do people like that, having almost 
absolute power, ever get punished?  Where's the justice 
in all of this? 
My eyes focussed back on her hand that was waving in 
front of me. 
"Where is your mind?" she asked. 
"I'm sorry, my mind was in left field." 
"Where is that?" 
"It just means I was thinking about things." 
"Are you going to get on the blanket?" 
"Oh."  I replied, edging over as she helped steady me. 
She helped me remove my boots and flight suit, as I lay 
prone.  Surprisingly, she straddled my body and leaned 
over, removing the bandage from around me, being easy 
when pulling it from the wound, front and back where 
the bullet had entered and exited.  At the same time I 
was flinching, trying to avoid the pain of her removing 
the bandage, my eyes were focussed on her breasts and 
trying to get a better view of the patch of hair 
between her legs.  She was sitting on my stomach; my 
prick was rigid, just behind her with the head touching 
the crack in her ass.  I was toying with her by flexing 
it, making it tap against her to let her know it was 
back there. 
"Turn on your side, I need to clean your back," she 
stated, tugging. 
I turned, and her cunt was pressing down on my hip.  
She touched the exit hole with the cloth and I 
flinched. 
"Umm, that feels so good," I stated. 
She leaned her head looking into my face with an 
expression, wondering why the pain felt good.  When she 
touched it, again I flinched. 
"Oh, that feels so wonderful," I repeated. 
"Do you want me to poke my finger in it?" she asked, 
thinking this was not right. 
 "I'm not thinking of the wound, it's the way you're 
sitting on me," I said chuckling. 
She looked down at how she was sitting and burst out 
laughing, and continued for a minute or so.  I 
chuckled, watching her laugh. 
When her laughter slowed, she said, "You need to be 
serious.  Your wounds are not healing well." 
"What can I do different, that would help?"  I asked, 
knowing all was being done. 
"I don't know what to do but keep it clean," she said, 
being concerned. 
"You may not know it but you are doing much more than 
that." 
"Such as?" 
"Think how much different it would be for me if you 
were a man." 
She began laughing again. 
"See, isn't that much better than pouting and worrying 
all the time?"  I said, running my hand down her hair. 
"I am so happy I met you."  She stated. 
I smiled with her. 
"Raise up," she said, looping the bandage around my 
back, and then securing it tightly.  "There, all done." 
I turned with my back on the blanket and placed my 
hands on the tops of her thighs. 
"Not quite," I stated, now being serious. 
She was sitting on my stomach with her knees out, just 
driving me crazy in that position.  I reached my hand 
and caressed her patch of hair with the back of my 
fingers, stimulating my senses, and bringing me back to 
a total erection. 
Her hands began caressing my chest as she moved her 
cunt in small gyrations against my belly, just above my 
prick.  Using only my right hand, I began feeling her 
breast, moving from one to the other. 
"You make me feel so good," she said, continuing to run 
her hands over me. 
Her words excited me as nothing I had ever heard.  What 
man wouldn't want a woman to say those words?  I put my 
hand on her shoulder and pulled her to me, kissing her 
mouth long and soft, and then moved my lips and tongue 
all about her eyes, nose and ears and to her neck.  Her 
eyes remained closed as her head squirmed, reacting to 
each touch of my lips and tongue. 
"Ooh Brian, I never felt like this," she whispered, 
holding her neck open for me to kiss. 
She raised her bottom and reached between her legs, 
grasping my prick and guided it into her cunt, and 
began back and forth moves, adjusting to my length.  
She extended her arms beside my shoulders, bracing 
herself as she continued massaging my prick with her 
cunt, using the lower part of her body.  Her hair 
flailed my upper body as she accelerated her moves, now 
rapidly pressing her cunt hard over my erection, 
grunting each time she took my prick deep inside. 
Faster and harder, she pushed her body, her hair 
flinging wildly, her cunt smashing down around my 
prick, bringing me closer.  That tingling sensation 
began building in my prick, causing my body and prick 
to become tense.  My hips stopped as I immersed my mind 
in all the sensation she was giving me.  All at once, 
my body exploded into ecstasy, my breathing was 
erratic, and awareness of time and place escaped me, my 
mind was numbed.  At that exact moment, the sensation 
crested, each part of my body shared in all the 
pleasure she was giving me, and then gradually it faded 
until I lay still.  Even after I had climaxed, she 
continued her movement, extracting every drop of my 
sperm, pleasing me even until the end when I went limp. 
As I had thought, the jolting and tension put on my 
body enflamed the pain I now felt in my side.  I masked 
it with smiles and kisses, burying my face in her neck 
to hide what would be obvious if she saw my face.  I 
allowed her to dwell in the truth, that she had given 
me total pleasure, and not spoiling her moment of 
happiness of having pleased me. 
She had packed everything again and we set out, knowing 
I couldn't go long distances, but each step put us 
closer to freedom.  Normally, under the same conditions 
we were in, with a rough surface, rain, each carrying 
our own gear it took us about fifty-five minutes to 
travel one kilometer.  Now, it was different, worse, 
she had to carry everything and I was even slower, 
because the strain of walking, and how it quickly 
weakened my body.  It was taking us near two hours to 
go one kilometer, twice as long. 
I knew if I was to tell her to leave the weapons, she 
would drop them immediately, but because I risked my 
life to obtain them, she would never mention it.  As I 
walked behind her, watching her struggle with each 
step, unwilling to give up, I wondered about what Lin 
had said to me about her wanting to die.  The girl Lin 
spoke of, this wasn't her, but I knew, or I should say, 
I was now familiar with what she had been going 
through the past two years. 
Each time Sian Moc looked back to check on me I 
would show her my fake smile, she would then gather 
enough strength to show me a little one.  We played 
this game about every ten minutes until sometimes she 
would look back and see me stopped, catching my 
breath or relaxing my side to relieve some of the pain.  
She would then walk back and let me lean on her 
shoulder to walk just a little further until we both 
needed rest, and always we would hide ourselves deep 
in the undergrowth. 
I had shown her various plants that had edible roots 
and twice she had shown me of a couple that I didn't 
know of.  I asked her about the Ti-Ti flower and she 
admitted she had a small portion of a root remaining, 
but that was for an emergency.  I wanted it bad but I 
knew it would knock me out for a day or more, 
depending on how large of a piece I chewed.  I think 
I wanted it more because it took away the pain. 
We were less than halfway to the valley, and I was 
beginning to feel as if I would never make it.  It 
began to rain, the pain was getting worse, and now with 
each step, I was becoming weaker, losing blood with 
each short distance we traveled.  I could tell that 
Sian Moc was also stretched to her limit, carrying 
everything, but seeming to be unwilling to give up.  
That is what kept me going. 
This last time when she looked back she stopped, 
looking closely at my side.  My flight suit was soaked 
in blood under my left arm. 
She quickly turned and hurried back to me, opening my 
suit. 
"We must stop, you are losing too much blood," she 
stated, unable to hold me up because of her own 
weakness. 
"Let's find a place to rest," I stated, exhausted, for 
her sake as well as mine. 
We turned from the creek and went into the undergrowth 
about fifty meters, struggling with each step.  It 
began to rain more with each minute that passed.  Maybe 
we had chosen a good time to rest, I thought. 
"Can you make it up there?"  She asked, pointing up a hill 
to an old tree with large limbs hanging.  It looked as 
if it were the best place to stop, giving us a line of 
sight toward the creek and some additional cover from 
the pouring rain. 
I wasn't sure if I could, but I was willing to try.  "I 
can make it." 
"Wait here," she said, crawling up the slope, holding 
onto anything she could get her hands and feet on.  
After reaching that spot, she left everything laying 
and slid back down to help me.  After many slips and 
taking short rest, we finally made it.  I lay on my 
right side, not able to move further as she pitched the 
poncho tent as I had before, using an added bandoleer 
to fit between two smaller trees.  After helping me 
underneath, immediately she placed the Ti-Ti root on my 
tongue. 
"Chew this while I clean you," she said, struggling to 
remove my Jumper. 
Moments later, I felt the pain dissipating and fell 
into a deep sleep. 
"Please don't.  Give me time to think this over," Carol 
said, lifting her arm to prevent me from putting it 
around her.  "How could you do this to us?" 
"I didn't do it to us.  I did it for us." 
"No.  I asked you to give me breathing space," she 
stated, rejecting my arm again. 
"If I didn't do this, it would haunt me for the rest of 
my life.  I made, what I feel is the right decision for 
me, and us, so there wouldn't be doubts lingering in 
the back of my mind," I explained. 
"I know what goes on in a war.  I know I could be 
notified tomorrow that you have been killed.  I'm not 
sure if I can deal with this anymore.  You don't know 
what I have been through this past year," she said, 
burying her face in her hands. 
I stood, pacing the floor, trying to understand what 
she was feeling.  I had no answers, having made my 
decision on returning for another tour.  I felt a 
certain regret for telling her so soon but at the same 
time relief, knowing I would be deceiving her 
otherwise. 
I walked over and knelt before her, placing my hands on 
my knees.  "I want you to know that I love you with all 
my heart.  I could never do anything consciously to 
hurt you.  Please don't reject me.  Now, more than ever 
I need you to love me and hold onto what we have," I 
said, begging, looking to her for understanding and 
love. 
"I'm not sure, I don't know what I'm feeling, except 
hurt." 
"Do you need time to think about it, maybe six months 
to a year," I said jokingly. 
Wrong thing to say, I felt, seeing the expression on 
her face.  She began wiping her eyes, and clearing her 
mind.  I felt a sudden chill, knowing she had made a 
decision.  I stood, dressed, and walked over, picking
 up my suitcase. 
"I see it in your face.  You don't want to have to deal 
with it anymore.  The funny thing is, I do understand, 
really."  I said, walking to the door. 
She didn't answer, but began crying again, solidifying 
my thoughts. 
"I hope you find someone that will make you happy.  I 
love you that much," I said walking out. 
Week 4-Day 6!
I awoke, feeling nothing but dizziness.  It was 
daylight but I couldn't determine what time of the day 
it was, or how long I had been asleep.  My eyes 
remained blurry for several minutes and then cleared, 
seeing Sian Moc checking my jumper to see if it was 
dry, apparently having washed it.  She was topless, 
with her top next to mine, on a bush.  I wasn't about 
to say anything and spoil the moment.  After she had 
examined our clothes, she picked up the water bag and 
a towel, and turned to me.  I quickly closed my eyes. 
I felt her warm hand against my face and a sudden 
coolness as she removed the blanket.  I almost jumped 
up, feeling cold water splashing on my body.  She was 
bathing me.  I would get use to the water temperature 
and she would splash me again, almost taking my breath 
away.  This went on several times until I had to put a 
stop to it. 
"Damn woman, you're going to freeze me to death!"  I 
said aloud, surprising her to where she dropped the 
water bag on me, spilling it.  "Oh damn that's cold," I 
said, trying to grab the bag. 
"That's what you get for frightening me," she said, and 
then began laughing. 
"It's not funny, I'm cold," I said snatching the cloth 
from her hand. 
She laughed harder, almost making me angry.  I wiped 
the wet spots off my body a reached for the blanket 
that was just out of my reach. 
"No," she said, continuing to smile.  "Do you want a 
bath?  Hand me the cloth." 
I thought for a second and handed it to her.  The soap 
bar was getting tiny, so instead of using the cloth 
with soap, she rubbed it between her hands and applied 
it to me that way.  As she smeared it over my body, I 
closed my eyes, savoring the feeling of her touch. 
"Don't splash cold water on me!"  I stated, looking up 
at her as a warning. 
She smiled again, and continued caressing the lather 
over me.  I closed my eyes again until she came near my 
prick and then I dipped my head, squinched my eyes, and 
watched.  That's all it took was getting near it, 
especially with her bare hands.  Teasingly, she avoided 
touching it but came near it several times.  Finally, 
aggravated with her teasing, I reached down with my 
right hand, clasping hers and moved it over my prick, 
bringing another round of laughter from her. 
"Real funny." 
With lather, her hand slid up and down smoothly on my 
prick, causing me to twitch when she raked her palm 
against the head.  After a few more strokes, she moved 
to my thighs.  I reached down and moved her hand back 
on my prick bringing more laughter.  I was now 
suspicious that she really was teasing me, but I held 
silent.  She resumed stroking and just as I was about 
to come, she stopped.  I opened my eyes and she was 
staring at me, and burst out laughing. 
"You have been teasing me!"  I said, and broke into 
laughter with her. 
She placed her hand on my prick again and began 
stroking, causing the smile to slip from my face.  
Moments later, my eyes began rolling in my lids as I 
spurted cum over my stomach, as she continued stroking. 
She picked up the water bottle and was about to wash it 
off. 
"No!  No!  Don't pour cold water on me," I said, taking 
the cloth and wiping it up. 
"You are so much like a child," she fussed. 
I took the bottle and slung cold water on her, 
causing her to suck in a deep breath. 
"See.  Now who is the child," I said and began 
laughing. 
She pouted for a second and also laughed, and then 
remarked,  "I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was so cold." 
"Sian Moc," I said looking into her eyes. 
She looked at me without saying anything. 
"Thank you.  Not for what you did a minute ago, but for 
all you have done.  You said before that you are happy 
that you met me.  Well, I am happy that I met you.  I 
want you to know that I've never met anyone like you 
before and you have changed my life.  I will never be 
the same since meeting you." 
"You have given me new hope, something I have not had 
in a long time.  I also will never be the same." 
I reach up caressing her cheek.  "Where ever our 
futures take us, you will always be in my thoughts." 
"Mine too Brian." 
"It must be the Ti-Ti root, I don't feel any pain right 
now.  By the way, how long was I out?" 
Almost two days, your wound is doing much better.  It 
has begun to heal some." 
"Good, we can begin moving again," I stated, excitedly. 
She placed a large portion of roots and berries in 
front of me and began finger feeding me until I had 
consumed all of it. 
"We must give it more time.  Two more days and you will 
be well enough to travel." 
"Two days?  We'll never get out of here at that rate," 
I said, arguing, with my mouth full. 
"We must give it time, here, chew this," she said 
holding another portion of the Ti-Ti root to my mouth. 
"I don't need that right now.  I'm in no pain and I'm 
not moving about." 
"Yes, I know, but the root is also helping you to heal 
faster," she explained. 
"Please, not now.  I don't want to sleep.  The view is 
so beautiful from where I lay." 
She looked baffled for a second, and then looked down, 
remembering her naked breasts, and laughed. 
"Okay, for a while, but you must tell me more of your 
home, United States." 
I smiled, unable to keep my eyes focussed sometimes, 
but I began telling her. 
"You would love it.  It's not perfect but it's the best 
place on this earth.  There are fifty states dividing 
it, much like your Provinces.  Each state has something 
different to offer, as far as the scenery and the 
cities.  It depends on where you go but for the most 
part, everyone is friendly.  In the northern states, 
people move at a quicker pace than in the southern 
states.  Out west, well I'm not sure, they are probably 
somewhere in between.  There are so many wonderful 
things; in comparison to the rest of the world that it 
wouldn’t be fair to say that, any one thing is better 
than the other.  Freedom to go and come as you please, 
live and work if you want, where you want.  The freedom 
to speak whatever you mind thinks, but don't shout 
'Fire' in a theater.  You would fit in so well.  I can 
picture you in front of a classroom-teaching math to 
little rug rats. 
"What is a rug rat?" she asked, with an awkward 
expression. 
"You know, children.  The kind that runs around on the 
rug." 
"Oh!  That's so funny," she said giggling. 
"Just think.  You could hold any office in government 
except President." 
"I wouldn't want to do that, be an official." 
"That's not the point, it's the fact that you can is 
what makes it wonderful." 
"I see," she said. 
I glanced down at her breast. 
"There are doctors that can fix that if you were of a 
mind to," I said, as she placed her hands covering her 
breasts.  "Please don't," I said, taking her by the 
wrist and pulling her hand away.  "I promise it doesn't 
bother me." 
"You are so kind." 
"Do you know something?  I have concluded that you are 
the perfect woman.  You have everything any man looks 
for in a woman.  First of all, beauty, inside and out, 
a loving heart, a sense of humor and most of all, you 
make a man feel like a real man." 
Her eyes moistened as she leaned forward, laying her 
head on my chest.  I caressed her neck and back as she 
lay quietly, soon falling asleep. 
I lay with my thoughts for a long time, caressing her, 
until I fell asleep. 
"Brian.  Brian.  Shush, VC!" she said, awakening me.  I 
leaned my head forward to see if I could spot them.  I 
couldn't see but we both could hear voices. 
"It sounds like there are quite a few, maybe ten or 
fifteen," I said, guessing. 
"They have many soldiers looking for us," she said, 
with fear showing about her face. 
"Don't worry, they are passing.  We'll be fine here," I 
said to comfort her.  "Let me have the Ti-Ti root.  I 
want us to get out of here sooner than later."  I 
stated, wanting to get rest so that we might not have 
to stop once we get moving. 
She reached and got it from her bedroll and placed it 
in my mouth.  In just a few minutes I was feeling its 
affect, soon putting me into another deep sleep.
Week 5-Day 1!
Early in the morning, a day and a half later I awoke.  
The pattering of rain sounded on the poncho above us as 
Sian Moc lay next to me sound asleep.  We both were 
dressed and I thought of how much of a struggle she 
went through to dress me.  Without thinking I picked up 
my watch with my left hand, suddenly realizing I could 
use it without much pain.  It was 0633 and I was ready 
to get up and moving. 
"Sian Moc, wake up," I said shaking her. 
She opened her eyes and looked at me.  I rubbed the 
sleep from her eyes and kissed her on the forehead. 
"Did you sleep well while I was conked out?"  I asked, 
making sure she had gotten enough. 
"I have slept very well.  I didn't have anyone to worry 
over.  I knew you were sleeping well," she explained, 
seeming cheerful. 
"Very funny.  Have I been that bad?" 
"Much like a rug rat," she said, snickering. 
"Are you ready to get moving?" 
"Brian, do we have to go in the rain?  Can we wait 
awhile?"  She asked, drearily. 
"One hour, then we need to get going.  We are so close 
now I can taste it," I said, feeling a sense of excitement 
building within.  "Let me up," I said, trying to get my 
right arm from under her head. 
"Be careful.  You will be dizzy for a while," she 
stated, holding my arm. 
She was right.  I sat up feeling dizzy, and then 
getting up on my knees, I felt dizzier, almost losing 
my balance.  I poked my head out of the end of the tent 
to refresh my face.  I was determined to get up, 
finally getting out of the tent and standing.  The rain 
helped, cooling my body and suppressing the flashes I 
felt in my face.  I continued holding myself up, 
gripping the tree that held up the tent.  After a few 
minutes, getting soaked, I began feeling an improvement 
in my awareness.  Turning loose of the tree, I took a 
few steps, and then a few more until I was walking 
without a crutch, holding onto a tree that is.  I 
climbed back into the tent, soaked, picking up the damp 
cloth and wiped my face. 
"Do you feel better?" 
"Much better.  I'm ready to go when you are," I said, 
stretching my left arm upwards.  "Ooh, it's stiff." 
She pulled the blanket over her head, hinting that she 
wasn't quite ready to go.  I leaned over placing my 
hand on her ass and began rubbing it. 
"What are you doing?"  She asked, with her voice 
muffled. 
"Rubbing your ass," I answered and continued. 
"Why?" 
"It gives me energy, or you might say it stimulates me." 
She pulled the blanket down a looked at me, asking, 
"For what?" 
"It's not what you think.  It excites me to the point I 
feel energetic, you know, for the trip." 
"Oh." 
I burst out laughing.  "You thought I had something else 
in mind, didn't you."  I said and continued laughing. 
She pulled the blanket back over her head, being 
embarrassed.  I then glided my hand to her front, 
sliding it under her bottoms.  She squirmed under my 
hand and pulled the blanket down, showing her face. 
"I think you are deceiving yourself," she said, 
cracking a smile. 
"Come on, get up before you end up being right." 
She sat up, stretching; with her knees up, she crossed 
her arms over them and watched me while I folded the 
blanket.  We traded smiles while I put my boots on. 
"So you were doing that for the reasons you said." 
"What?"  I asked, and then understood what she was 
asking. 
"I want you to tickle me again.”  She asked, seriously. 
I reached over, taking her foot and began tickling her. 
"No.  No," she said, sounding frustrated. 
"Under your arm?" 
"No, down here," she said, placing her hand between 
her legs. 
I laughed.  "You want me to eat you." 
"Yes," she said timidly. 
"If I do it now, I will end up losing energy and you 
know why," I stated, knowing I would have to go all the 
way. 
"Please." 
"I promise I'll do it at our next rest stop.  We need to 
get started," I said, squatting next to her and giving her 
a kiss. 
"Do you promise?" 
"I promise," I replied.  I was willing to do it now but 
I was anxious and had my mind made up to get moving. 
"How long before we get to the valley." 
"We could get there late this afternoon if I can hold up 
that long." 
"Will we rest before then?" 
I burst out laughing.  "You talk about a one track mind," 
I said, teasingly. 
She buried her face between her knees. 
"I was laughing because you have told me that I like a 
lot of sex." 
She raised her head smiling, realizing I was telling the 
truth. 
"Well, as much as I hate it, we need to go.  You can 
use the poncho again." 
"No.  You must keep the wrapping dry," she said, her 
selflessness caused me to feel guilty for not doing as 
she wanted, eating her.  I knew it would be the best 
for us if I kept it dry. 
 We quickly gathered everything and set out.  At first, 
I was weary about the pace we had set but after a 
couple of hours, I was feeling hopeful, experiencing 
only minor discomfort.  Every so often, I would look 
back at Sian Moc and smile, wondering if she was 
thinking about a long rest stop; however, we were 
making good time and with each step, I became more 
anxious. 
About mid afternoon, my side began to ache and we 
began stopping every so often, resting for only a few 
minutes, and then moving again.  She checked my side 
during a couple of these stops but there was no 
bleeding, giving me more encouragement. 
An hour before sundown we passed the spot in the 
valley where the others had camped, seeing no signs 
they had ever been there and continued.
_______________________________________ 
It was dusk and we planned on stopping to rest but it 
was near completely dark. 
"SSSS!"  She said, with her finger against her lips. 
I stopped, kneeling down and quietly listened, hearing 
the faint sound of laughter. 
"VC soldiers!" she whispered, pointing ahead of us. 
We moved into thicker undergrowth and weaved our 
way toward the sounds.  A glimmer of light flickering 
shown ahead, meaning there was a campfire. 
"Hot food!"  I joked, in a whisper.  She didn't think 
it was funny. 
We continued slowly, edging closer as their voices were 
now heard.  She put her finger against her lips, 
wanting total silence.  I knew she was trying to make 
out what was being said.  I watched closely, waiting 
for her to say something.  Fear came to her face as I 
watched the change. 
"What is it, what are they saying?"  I asked as I saw 
the fear enveloping her. 
Tears fell from her eyes.  "We must leave and go around 
them, hurry!" she said, taking my arm. 
"No!  Not until you tell me what they are saying.  Now 
tell me!"  I demanded. 
She fell to her knees.  "They have American soldiers. 
They speak of killing them," she answered, looking up 
at me. 
My mind raced, searching for an answer. 
"I've got to get closer, you stay here," I said, putting my 
hand on her head. 
"No, I will go with you.  You don't know what they 
speak." 
"Come on then, and be quiet!"  I said, whispering, 
taking one of the AK-47's as I lowered myself to the 
ground and began crawling.  It was almost completely 
dark as we crawled.  Pain was shooting through my body 
but fear allowed me to continue.  We crawled within ten 
meters of them and positioned ourselves behind a large 
tree.  I counted thirteen VC sitting, some lying near 
the fire and two more were walking in front of a row of 
American soldiers.  They were humped forward on their 
knees, hog-tied, unable to move. 
"What's he saying?"  I asked, putting my mouth to her 
ear, with my arm over her shoulder.  Her body trembled. 
"He tells soldiers by the fire that this is a lesson in 
interrogation, for them to pay attention." 
It must have been a joke because the all began laughing 
and talking among them. 
"You have six minute.  You will tell me where my 
village people are, and where American soldier is that 
take them from village," he stated, speaking American. 
"We don't know anything about any villagers or an 
American soldier," the soldier on the far end said, his 
voice strained. 
I quickly thought, they have no idea who or where I 
am, why is he asking them. 
"You will tell," the officer stated. 
I felt Sian Moc's body shaking as she buried her face.  
"What is it?  Do you know something?"  I asked, lightly 
shaking her. 
"That is Colonel Shu." 
It then occurred to me what he was capable of doing. 
Before I had time to react, he walked up to the soldier 
opposite the end where the other spoke and said, taking 
a pistol from the one next to him, "Time is up!" 
Pointing the pistol to his head and pulled the trigger.  
The GI's body fell over sideways. 
"Oh god no!"  I said to myself, burying my face into 
the ground. 
"You have one hour!" he said to the remaining GI's, and 
then said something in Vietnamese to the other 
soldiers. 
Two of them, sitting next to the fire, jumped up, 
walked over to the body, and carried it away. 
I counted eleven GI's remaining, and knew each of them 
would soon die.  I had one hour to do something before 
he shot another.  I wondered how many he had already 
murdered before we came upon them.  I then thought of 
the body count that I was proud of.  I knew there was 
no difference except I didn't line them up, hog-tied, 
and slaughter them as he was doing.  Their talking and 
laughter angered me, but also made it evident they had 
no suspicions. 
I saw the Americans gear, but no weapons, in a pile not 
far from me, and what looked like an antenna of a 
radio. 
I placed my lips to Sian Moc's ear.  "I need to get 
that radio, help me camouflage my body," I said, 
placing limbs with leaves down my collar and holes in 
my flight suit.  She continued crying but helped 
blanket me. 
"Now go back a ways, and wait for me.  If you hear 
shooting, go in that direction for a while and hide 
until the sun comes up, and then head into the sun for 
one day.  You should find the firebase.  If you do find 
it, shout at them in American English, and give these 
to them," I explained, giving her mine and Cal's dog 
tags.  She said nothing, shaking her head only, knowing 
there was nothing she could say to change my mind. 
I gave her a few minutes to get some distance and 
inched my way near the radio, not making a sound.  
More than five minutes later, I had reached it, and 
slowly pulled it from the pile, unsure if it remained in 
working condition.  Cautiously, I crept my way away 
from them until I could get to my feet, and walk. 
Sian Moc grabbed my arm as I almost passed her.  "You 
didn't go far enough," I whispered, taking her hand. 
We went another twenty meters and stopped.  I needed 
light to see the dials, but had nothing to aid with 
that.  I didn't want to turn it on and it begins 
blaring, so I had to wait for the moon to give me 
light.  Impatiently, I waited for what seemed hours, 
but I knew it was around ten minutes and I saw the word 
volume below one dial.  Immediately I turned it counter 
clockwise and flipped the toggle switch to the on 
position.  I left the frequency dial in that position, 
hoping it was tuned right.  Slowly I raised the volume, 
and hearing static, I adjusted the squelch control, 
silencing it. 
"Firebase Beaver, this is Raven, do you copy?  Firebase 
Beaver, this is Raven, do you copy?" 
With no response, I made a small adjustment and tried 
again. 
"Firebase Beaver, this is Raven, do you copy?  Firebase 
Beaver, this is Raven, do you copy?" 
"Thi- is --e B--ver, c--e -ack, who I---his?"  There 
was static and I tuned the frequency a notch. 
"Firebase Beaver, this is Raven, do you copy?" 
"Raven, this is Beaver, identify yourself." 
"I am a downed pilot, come back Beaver." 
"I'll have to take your word on that.  What is your 
location?  I'll have you verified." 
"No Beaver.  Do you have a patrol thirty clicks east?  
They have been captured by VC." 
"Hold one Raven," he said as I waited a couple of 
minutes. 
"Raven, this is Bloodhound, I'm a chopper pilot.
Can you verify what you say?" 
"I am a downed Cobra Pilot.  I was escaping with South 
Vietnamese villagers." 
"I have a map Raven, can you verify this map?" 
"The hand written note reads.  These people saved my 
life, please help them to safety, Raven." 
"That is a confirmation Raven.  Can you track the 
patrol?" 
I quickly looked at Sian Moc and she smiled, hearing 
about the map, knowing they had made it. 
"Damn it Bloodhound, you don't understand!  The VC are 
not taking them back they are shooting one every hour.  
I need support now!  We have twenty minutes before the 
next American is slaughtered.  Do you have another 
patrol nearby?" 
"Raven, this is Colonel Martin, give us your exact 
location and we'll have choppers there in one hour.  Do 
you copy?" 
"Fuck an hour Colonel.  Can you get them here in 
fifteen minutes?" 
"Give your location and hold your position Raven!" 
"Thirty Clicks, due east, Raven out."  I switched the 
radio off.  I knew they couldn't get here in time. 
I stood up, angry at their stupidity. 
"No, no, no, no, please don't go, please, I love you," 
Sian Moc begged, holding onto my leg.  She knew what I 
was about to do. 
I took her shoulder and tried pushing her away. 
"Please, please, I love you," she continued saying, 
holding me tightly. 
I pushed her hard, causing her to fall backwards.  "I 
have to, and you know I do," I said, wishing it weren't 
this way. 
I picked up the AK-47 and felt a sharp pain, and reached 
for the second, but I couldn't bend.  Using the weapon 
as a crutch, I managed to pick up the second.  I could 
feel the blood oozing through the bandage, and down my 
side, cursing to myself, knowing I had begun bleeding 
again.  I walked, and with each step, it seemed as 
though it was a hundred meters.  My mind was racing, 
however I knew I was inching my way, each step a task 
in itself.  With each step bringing me nearer, I heard 
increasing sounds of laughter. 
I stopped and rested against a tree, checking the clips 
and rounds in the magazines.  The magazine was full,
 and I switched rifles and checked the second.  
The full magazines were a prayer answered and I looked 
up slowly, thanking my maker.  Was he with me, I 
wondered, saying a silent prayer? 
Without noticing, the pain had all but vanished, I felt 
content and relaxed.  I was filled with a fresh breath 
of life, and looked about my surroundings because there 
was stillness, as I had never felt.  I knew this was my 
last day, my last hour, and I was within my last 
minutes of my final mission.  I eased forward a few 
steps; the laughter and talking became the sounds of 
death.  Two more steps and I froze, seeing the Colonel 
pacing.  I knew it was a matter of seconds. 
  Suddenly, I knew I was going to die, and numbness 
overcame me, knowing I had avenged my father's death.  
For the second time I was one-on-one with my enemy.  I 
inched slowly and cautiously.  I was determined to get 
as close as possible and keeping my eye on the Colonel 
as I closed in.  My first round would be squeezed off 
the moment anyone touched a weapon.  Nothing else 
mattered, except ending his savagery.  In my peripheral 
vision, I could see the Colonel and the soldiers who 
were laughing, and I knew four or five would fall, 
before the remaining touched their weapons.  The quiet 
and stillness I felt earlier were replaced by the 
pounding of my heart and breathing.  I tried holding my 
breath, as any moment they would hear me breathing. 
With nothing left but my soul, I walked into the camp, 
and was spotted by a VC who froze, as if he was 
paralyzed.  I quickened my steps and walked right up to 
them and open fired, spraying all that were around the 
fire.  As I saw some reach for their weapons, I opened 
up on them, with their own weapons I had stolen.  I 
knew the Colonel was without a weapon and no one was 
near to give him one.  I emptied one rifle and while 
firing with the other, I picked the closest weapon and 
released the safety, dropping the expelled weapon and 
continued firing, and when I had emptied that one, I 
picked up another releasing the safety. 
I stood looking about the bodies feeling as a zombie, 
hearing moans of pain and seeing movement I walked to 
each and opened with a burst, until silence fell. 
I turned to the colonel and walked up to him, and 
asked,  "Do you know Sian Moc, Lin Li, Shen, Loi, Komi, 
Yam Nah?" 
"No, I don't know them." 
"Yes you do, and you had better tell me the truth, do 
you know them?" 
"Yes, but I be nice to them." 
I pointed the rifle at his groin and pushed the barrel 
against his trousers, and pulled the trigger until it 
was empty.  I stood over him for a moment and quickly 
looked to my right.  Sian Moc was standing there not 
moving, but staring.  I raised my hand to her and she 
ran up throwing her arms around me.  After a moment, I 
walked over to the soldier on the left end, pulled my 
knife from my boot, cutting him loose, and continued 
until they each were cut free. 
I turned, walked toward Sian Moc and fell to my knees 
as she rushed to me.  The pain, my sense of what 
happened, love, hate, and all of my emotions returned 
to me at once.  I felt a sense of shame at the way I had 
killed the Colonel.  I sat with my back against Sian Moc 
as she braced me.  I looked at all the soldiers as each of 
their silhouettes seemed distant visions that I 
recognized only by flashes of the fire.  Each faced me, 
seeming to fixate their eyes upon me, seeing a madman.  
Each, one by one walked toward me, and as their faces 
became clear, I saw tears flowing down their faces as 
each knelt and touched my knee, thanking me.  
However, the last one leaned over and hugged me. 
"I was next, I owe you my life," he stated, as he 
cried. 
I squeezed his arm.  "No you don't.  We owe our lives 
to each other.  I have no doubt that you have saved or 
will save another brother's life." 
"Thank you," he said and walked to the others. 
I turned my head looking at Sian Moc.  "All of your 
people made it," I said as we cried together.