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Cordelia Speedicut's

Wicked Bedtime Stories

I’ve always felt that erotica tends to take itself too seriously – a stick up its collective bum, as it were. For my part, I find the whole bumping of pelvises thing to be intrinsically comic. Fun in other ways, too - but still.

I started out trying to write parodies of the genre, and discovered that a whole lot of exaggeration was needed to get beyond the standard fare. So I settled for a serving of perversity with (hopefully) a bit of humour on the side.

It took me a while to notice that there were some recurring themes that were a bit ... sideways. The most consistent thread you'll find here is transformation. Not the furry hentai sort; more the sort of thing that Greek and Roman mythology revels in. I find there's nothing like a meadow full of nymphs and satyrs to get the blood stirred - not that either creature gets more than a few walk-on roles below.

The Stories (to October 2011):
~ Newest additions highlighted in Red~

New Part: Cinderella: An Erotic Fairy Tale – Actually, several connected tales in which the story is retold. It begins with a Witch, some Ruffians and Rats, a Curse, and a Member of Unusual Size. And then things get more Complicated … with a Fire Breathing Dragon, some Mercenaries and Blacksmiths, an Erotic Fountain and some Rude Confectioneries, plus Hot Tail and yet another Member of Unusual Size. Also Baccanalias and Tuna. Fourth Part (points one and now two) to July 2011.

Monsieur Perrault's story starts us off (admittedly loosely), followed by some seriously twisted business by yours truly. The most recent part is based on an idea suggested by Alex Suriel.

fantasy & humor; MF, FF, size, tf, toys, orgy, zoo (do dragons & centaurs count?)

Club Latex - Several young Ladies visit a new Fetish Club – which, Unfortunately for them, is Secretly run by a Mad Doctor. Even more Unfortunate is the fact that he is Founder and CEO of Doc Abseil’s Animatronic Orgasmatron Manufacturing Enterprises. Eight chapters to August 2008.

fantasy & humor; MF, FF, Fdom, size, gr, tf, tg, toys, mc, orgy

Dunyazad - A Victorian Adventure, involving Templars & a Jinniyah, plus Sex, Violence and Cheap Brandy. Each episode concludes in an Exciting Cliffhanger. Three episodes to date.

 fantasy & humor; MF, FF, size, tf, tg, toys (viol not sexual)

An Erotic Theme upon Christmas, entitled The Toy Shoppe - A Midwinter’s Tale - Being a modern Encounter with an unusual Angel. One chapter to date.

 fantasy & humor; MF, FF, toys

Latex Bloom - No latex, in spite of the title - just rude Shrubberies. Oh - and some Plans for World Dominion. Four chapters to date.

Story cribbed from ‘Latex Plant’ by Steven Nicholes … which in turn was a rewrite of ‘Late Bloomer’ by Dragonfly (all three are posted together at Kristen’s Archives). This version recycles most of the plot and characters for a couple of chapters, before wandering off on its own path.

fantasy & humor; Fff, mf, preg

Droids R Us - Concerning a Sex-bot, and What Happens when Virtual Reality goes wrong. Eleven chapters to March 2011.

The core of this plot was largely liberated from Copy by baubleheadz. New cast of characters, though, and a whole new story arc.

fantasy & humor; tf, Mff, mc, in, toys, gr

The Dog Sitter - a quick and silly riff on the old “girl meets mad scientist (to say nothing of his dog)” story. Of course, my Heroine would never ordinarily Dream of engaging in the Acts depicted here, but for certain Sinister Influences. And neither would the dog. This one calls for a tip of the Mad Doctor’s hat to Umgestalten, whose story Breeder Bitch was a major influence. Second, completely unnecessary chapter, July 2009.

fantasy & humor; tf, mc, zoo, preg

Charlotte the Harlot - A young woman annoys her lover - who, as it turns out, has both Trust issues and Thaumaturgical talents. Three chapters to March 2011. Inspired by a coloured drawing by bielegraphics.

fantasy & humor; MF, FF, gr, tf, toys, orgy, in, zoo

The Fountain in the Garden - A twisted quickie in which a young Wicca is drawn by a Greater Power to an assignation of Wicked Intent. Transmogrification will Ensue. Presented with a tug of the forelock to Seraphic Soul, from whom I borrowed the Dance at the heart of this little story. February 2011.

fantasy & humor; FF, gr, tf, mc, orgy.

Lastly, I’d like to present an old favourite of mine – A Succubus Awakes, by Amajinarie, wherein a young lady discovers an untapped talent for sex. Two very lightly re-edited chapters - plus, I have also added my own version of subsequent events ... mainly because I couldn’t wait to see what might happen next. Consider it an alternate sequel, or something. Four chapters to June 2009. (The un-edited original two chapters may be found at Literotica.)

fantasy & humor; tf, mc, gr, orgy

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For all the above, the author offers this disclaimer: All actors in my stories are consenting adults; most are human. They are all above the age of majority in your community, and all are of drinking age. Those who require it have carriage-driving certificates. Flying sequences were performed by professionals and should not be attempted at home. In some jurisdictions, certain of the acts depicted (including girl on girl, gambling, thaumaturge, reptilian love, and those involving liquorice, bedposts and statuary) may be taken as having been simulated. No animals were hurt in the production of these stories.

Also, an apology: If you've read the stories so far as to reach where the endings aught to be, you will often note the lack of one. I prefer to think of it as having left room for sequels. Which I will try to post from time to time. Also, feel free to let me know about any shocking lapses in syntax or continuity - not to mention spelling (for the most part, I've done my own editing).

Many of these stories have previously appeared on various other sites (see links page, below), but were lightly re-edited prior to being gathered here. You will find various cultural references, but the pirates, princes, mermaids, mice, fairy godmothers and dragons, et al, are not intended to be Disney-esque. (Not that D 's material is necessarily cute - that dragon/witch thing from 'Sleeping Beauty' still scares the hell out of me.)

Finally, the author advises that you do NOT read these stories aloud to your children at bedtime – unless they are adults, which conjures images the author refuses to contemplate further.

Cordelia Speedicut

Comments? Feedback? Contact: cordelia.speedicut@gmail.com

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For Further Amusing Links, click here. (Current to July 2011.)

Or, revisit the welcome page to get another look at that bat babe (or to double-check the warning about sexually explicit material. See? I told you this stuff was immature.)