"Cannon Song" by Niles Naismith (Mnaismith@hotmail.com). Guest review by jubjub.
Story Summary: A sexual Truth or Dare of sorts set in '60s Princeton University.
This is a plainly told story. Therein lies both its strength and its weakness. Without the stylistic flourishes, the story's simple descriptions carry considerable impact. The author ended with a footnote thanking his editor for telling him that the story originally read like a lecture. I can assure you that this story no longer has that feel. But it still seems a bit forced. A more natural, nostalgic tone would have been even better.
The biggest complaint that I had was with the characters. There is considerable narrative but none of the characters are particularly notable. There is also a twist of sorts near the end of the story that seemed to come out of nowhere. It throws a shadow of incest on the story that jars the flow. Part of the reason for this is that the characters are not deeply written enough so that the relationships mean anything.
But this story still works. Its simple style is both elegant and clean. This includes the lack of vulgarities. I read this story three times and all three times the sex scenes (which came toward the end of the story) were effective and believable. They were, in fact, visualizable on both the physical and emotional levels. While its evocation of 'free' sex on a campus wasn't as fully fleshed out as I would have liked, it was good enough to help reveal the primary tension in this story. Definitely one of the best I've reviewed this year.