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"A Guest of Celeste" by Ted (an477638@anon.penet.fi). Veteran readers of these Reviews may recall that in CR 52 I reviewed a story entitled "An Ode to Celeste; or, Meeting the Muse" by an author named Ted The premise of that story was that Celeste is an author of a highly respected series of reviews for a.s.s. who maintains a cabin in a secluded mountain area where she goes to check out possibly fraudulent story lines with sexy young men whom she solicits through the Internet. A young man named Ted shows up for his appointment with fate and is invited to join his predecessor in exchanging pleasures with the Grammar Goddess of Usenet. It was a really hot, well-written story.

Well, Ted is back; and he's in fine fettle - whatever that means. If he's as good in the sack as he is with his word processor, I would bet that there's a lucky lady out there somewhere. The main premise of the present story is that Ted has been invited to meet with the REAL Celeste; and this time she is giving assistance to a novice author named Amy, who needs to make her sex stories more realistic. Actually, Amy is allegedly the author of "A Weekend on the Island" (a very hot withSue story to which your humble servant gave a rating of 10 in CR 44); and so one might be a bit skeptical about her actual need for enlightenment. In short, the story consists of an orgy in the context of a writing lesson. An interesting element is that Ted follows in this very story some of the advice that he has Celeste give to her student.

To a certain extent, Ted's treatment of Celeste is realistic. For example, she assiduously makes notes on Amy's manuscript and helps her develop her writing skills even while Amy is in the process of giving head to Ted. Such scholarly devotion to task is a mark of a true teacher, critic, and sex goddess.

On the negative side, the author spelled Deirdre's name wrong. He spelled it Deidre as in Ng, rather than Deirdre as in Sherwood Anderson. I'll skip past his Celestial use of "ain't," which was in poor taste. However, at one point the author has Celeste say, "...would you like to read it, so you know where we're at?" Now, I don't mind ending the sentence with a preposition, but I never use the expression "where at." I guess I could use these errors to accuse Ted of faulty research, but that would be tantamount to inviting a third story. Actually, that's not a bad idea. Your research sucks, Ted! It sucks dinosaur dildos!