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                        Survey shows most authors are perverts


	New York - Matt Sludge here.  A survey conducted by my staff has 
revealed that most Internet sex authors are perverts.
	�It makes sense,� social commentator Lillian Healthwell told me.  
�Who is going to write sex stories?  Not a normal person.  She or he is too 
busy having sex.  So instead perverts write it.  Gays, transvestites, 
pedophiles, people like that.�
	�This will become our national heritage,� librarian Boswell Torque 
told me.  �In the future, all literature will be read on computers, accessed 
from the Internet.  And what people will mostly get is this sort of thing.�  
He pointed to his computer.  Lurid text glowed on the screen.  �There�s 
just so much of it!  And every day more is written, by all the repressed 
sexual minorities.�
	A politician, shown the poll, agreed there was only one way to stop 
the flood of porn.  �Some day we may have to let gays out of the closet,� 
he told me.  �And pedophiles out of the toy closet.�

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Copyright 2001 by Andrew Roller.
    

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