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                                        Andrew Roller Presents
 
                                                GIRL PATROL

                                          Chapter Thirty-Four

         Inside the small slanted-walled chamber was a trap door.  I looked 
at the girls, the sun bright on the desert sand out beyond the pyramid�s 
doorway.
         �Let me see if I can get it up,� I said.  Becky huddled close to Kim.  I 
reached down.  There was an old metal ring set in the door and I closed my 
fist around it.  I yanked, gently at first, then harder.  Suddenly it jerked 
up.  Dust flew up from on top of it.  If the vampire had been using this 
room, he must not have had the strength to get the inner door open.  I 
coughed.  I wanted to let go of the door but I held onto it.  I pulled again, 
nearly wrenching my arm out of my shoulder.  The door came up, like some 
heavy metal street covering, and I leaned it gently back against the inward 
leaning wall.  
         A gaping hole stared up at us, black as the depths of night.
         �Yeek!  I don�t want to go down there!� Becky cried.
         �There are vampires in there for sure,� Kim said.  I coughed again.  I 
waved my hand in front of my face.  There was still dust in the air from 
my pulling back the trap door.
         �I don�t know about you,� I said.  �But I�m thirsty.  And I don�t see 
any faucet here.�
         �Or a drinking fountain,� Becky said, glancing around from the safety 
of Kim�s arms, here eyes wide.  Kim laughed and pushed her away.
         �A drinking fountain!� she said.  �Have you ever seen a drinking 
fountain here in this fucking strange land?�
         �Okay, ha ha,� I said.  �Still--�  My voice broke off.  I motioned to 
the girls to be quiet.
         �What is it?� Kim asked, after a moment.
         �Shhh!� Becky hissed at her, putting her finger to her lips, glad for a 
chance to correct the older girl.
         �There�s some kind of a light down there,� I said.
         �Ghosts!� Becky said, her eyes wide as saucers.
         �That�s all we need,� Kim said, in a sudden fit of exhaustion, a girl 
at the end of her rope.  �Vampires, wraith-vampires, werewolves, 
skeletons, and now ghosts.�
         �Par for the course,� I said.
         �I wish we had our guns,� Becky said.
         �You never shot much anyway,� Kim told her.
         �Shut up!� Becky said.  The light below went out.
         �Damn!� I swore, under my breath.  I looked at the two girls.  My eyes 
must have had a glare in them for my two playmates grew suddenly tense 
and quiet.  We waited, there in the stillness of that room, the sun growing 
brighter outside.  There was a murmur, then someone, or something from 
down below said,
         �Master, I heard a voice.�  There was a growl.  �Master,� came again 
a moment later.  Another growl.
         �Probably the wraith-vampire, trying to get in,� the voice, deeper 
than the first, answered.
         �But master!�
         �Hold the wrench.  I don�t like being stranded out here.�  There was 
silence for awhile, something metal dropped to the floor.  The deep voice 
swore.  After a bit the higher voice said,
         �What if your machine works now, and goes back in time?�  A growl.
         �It doesn�t work,� the deeper voice said.
         �But what if it does, master?  This time?� the higher voice asked.
         �It goes back and forth across the desert.  That�s it!  Okay?� the 
deeper voice answered.  There was silence again, and then the lighter 
voice said,
         �Well, its still saleable, master.  Even if it does just go across the 
desert.�
         �Not if the sun blows up, you fucking dolt!� the deeper voice 
answered.
         �Sorry, master,� the higher voice said.
         �No problem.  That�s why you�re only a ghoul,� the deeper voice said.  
As I listened, worrying about the noise the girls had made, I suddenly hit 
on a plan.  I motioned to the girls what I was thinking.  At first they didn�t 
understand, but as I pantomimed it, they caught on.  Kim, childishly, said,
         �Got it!� when she understood, and Becky immediately gave her a 
loud, �Shhhh!�
         �Master!  What�s that?� the higher voice shouted.  I turned.  There 
was an old ladder leading down into the hole.  I steeled myself against the 
darkness.  I nodded to the girls and began to climb down.  Dust fell from 
the rungs of the ladder as I climbed.  No one had gone down this in a long 
time.
         Two eyes peered up at me.  I looked down and saw a human face.  But 
corrupted somehow, as if a prisoner for many years in this place.  
         �Hello!� I called down.
         �Who�re you?� the voice called back.  I heard a hissing sound.  I 
looked down again and saw another pair of eyes, another face, but paler 
than the first.  I lowered myself down the rest of the way on the ladder.  
When I turned around, I found myself standing in a large room.  And then I 
saw it, next to the two men who greeted me.
         �The magical closet!� I cried, or almost did, catching my voice at the 
last moment lest the girls upstairs hear me.  It stood gleaming dully, 
amidst a room decorated with egyptian art.  I wondered how the Hell it had 
ever gotten all the way down here.
         The male man, who was tall and now spoke with a deep voice, said to 
me, �I see you�re admiring my machine.�
         �Yes,� I said.  I noticed that the man who was pale was dressed in 
black.  His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, but his 18th century garb 
and his choice of color made me suspect he was a vampire.  I looked at the 
other man beside him:  hunched, slavish, degraded in demeanor.  He had the 
look of someone who, if he�d been drinking blood, hadn�t done too well by 
it.  Then it hit me:  he wasn�t sick from drinking blood, he was sick from 
having the other man drink from him!  When the slavish one turned 
fawningly toward the man in black I looked at his neck.  Yep, two big bite 
marks, healing badly, probably because they kept getting used.
         �Do you know anything of such machines?  I thought I saw a light of 
recognition in your eyes,� the man in black said.
         �No,� I answered.  But I saw he didn�t believe me.  This one was 
smart.  This was no wraith-vampire.  I decided truth might be my best 
defense.
         Still thinking I might be of some value to him for more than just the 
blood in my veins, the man in black extended his hand.  
         �I�m Ilangor,� the man told me.  �Ilangor Bond.�  He laughed.  I 
laughed and then I realized he was telling the truth and I said, 
         �I�m Brian Galbladder.�
         �Change your name some time,� the man in black suggested.  �Brian 
Bond would sound so much better.�  I winced at the comment.  I realized 
my name sounded like a body part, and an unlovely one at that (not that 
Brian Breast would have been any better), but I still didn�t like being 
teased about it.  The vampire raised his hand.
         �That�s for later,� he said.  �But tell me about your knowledge of 
this machine.�
         �How did it get down here?� I asked.
         �In the Ellison grave?� the vampire asked, and was about to say 
more when I said,
         �Is that the name of this place?�
         �Why yes,� the vampire said.  He looked at me more closely.  �You 
must not be from around here.�
         �No,� I said.
         �This is the famous Lawrence J. Ellison grave,� the vampire said.  He 
looked around at the egyptian art on the walls.  �Or tomb, or mausoleum, 
or whatever you want to call it.  Plundered years ago, except for these 
paintings on the walls.  I�m surprised our fellow citizens of Darkness City 
didn�t wrench the blocks out from the wall one by one so they could take 
the paintings too.�
         �Oh,� I said.  
         �It�s the only pyramid in America,� Ilangor said.
         �It�s not much of a pyramid,� I said.  Ilangor and his servant looked 
at me oddly and I went on, lifting my hand, �I mean, the pyramids in Egypt 
are big.�
         �This is big!� Ilangor said.  �Mostly it�s covered by sand now.  All of 
this here, where we�re standing and more down below besides, once 
towered over the desert, or so I�m told.  But time passed and slowly the 
thing got covered up.�
         �Oh,� I said.  The vampire spit on the ground.  He smiled at me.
         �I see you know nothing,� he said.  If he was restraining himself, he 
could do it no longer.  Suddenly he lunged at me.  Unlike his friend, I was 
not a human hunched over and degenerated from years of being sucked.  I 
was new, ripe, and he wanted me.  I screamed.  I grabbed the ladder.  The 
vampire jumped on my back.  He bit into my neck but the shirt I�d tied 
around it yesterday was still there.  His fangs nicked my skin, drawing 
blood.  I winced in pain but felt nothing drain from me.  He�d missed my 
veins.
         All the while I was scrambling up the ladder.  The ghoul came 
rushing to the ladder and started up after me, but I was well ahead of him, 
and faster, even with his master clinging to my back.  Terrified, I climbed 
higher as Ilangor found his fangs were caught in the shirt around my neck.  
Finally he yanked them free and stabbed again.  
         I felt a sudden flash of horror.  He had hit a vein.  My life blood began 
to drain from me.  I was near the top of the ladder.  I grabbed the top rung 
but had trouble pulling myself up.
         �Girls!� I cried.  �Help!�  As the vampire sucked, four little hands 
came over the edge of the hole.  They grabbed my wrist.  I felt them 
pulling and suddenly shoved upward with my lowest foot.  Then my next, 
then my next -- the vampire had me and was sucking, but thanks to my 
shirt he didn�t have a really good bite-hold.  Suddenly I was out of the 
hole.  I tumbled across the sandy floor in the little upstairs room.  The 
girls shoved hard, on both the vampire and me.
         Together, like some paired beast, I rolled out the doorway of the 
little room.  The sun was bright outside and it hit me.  It also hit what 
was on top of me.
         A howl like a dying banshee pierced my ears.  A shower of leaches 
fell suddenly down over my head.  Worms seemed to pop from me and come 
slithering down my arms.  Flies buzzed and swarmed.  For a moment I 
thought I had somehow become a vampire, but of course my assailant was 
not giving me the Kiss, the death-transforming bite that makes a man a 
vampire.  He simply wanted blood.  Instead he found his doom.
         As the creature decayed and I managed to pull myself out from under 
his rotting remains, I spotted the girls.  They were standing in the 
doorway.  Transfixed, they watched as the vampire met his end.  Both were 
holding their noses.  The smell of death was like rancid meat.
         �That�s what you get when you don�t use Coppertone,� I said, trying 
to make light of the fact that I was covered with worms and leaches.  I 
was preoccupied with brushing them off me when suddenly I looked up and 
shouted, �Watch out for the other!�
         Suddenly Kim and Becky were shoved right into the pile of leeches 
and rotting flesh.  The vampire�s slave stood in the doorway, hunched and 
livid.  He glared and watched as the girls� bodies tumbled in the leaches.  
And the sun.  But they were unaffected, as was I, by the sun anyway.  He 
cursed.
         �Fucking bastard!� I cried, as the girls howled at finding themselves 
in a kind of impromptu graveyard, all the contents above ground and 
festering.  I attacked the slave.  I yanked him out into the sun but, except 
for giving a howl and lifting his arm to block its rays from his face, he 
was as unaffected as I.  I punched him and he went down in the sand.  I 
picked him up and threw him onto the remains of his master.  He writhed 
and leapt up, as the little girls, already up, stamped and danced, trying to 
get all the awful creatures off them.
         �What are you?� I said to the man, grabbing his shirt.  I ignored the 
leaches.  I was too angry at the moment to bother with them.
         �I- I�m a ghoul, master,� he stammered, after a moment of staring at 
me.
         �How did you get our magical closet down in that fucking pyramid?� 
I asked him.  His eyes widened.
         �Our closet is down there?� Kim, who had most of the leaches off 
her by now, asked.
         �Yes!� I told her.  �How did you get it down there?� I shouted to the 
ghoul.
         �I- I built it.  From Giolo�s plans,� the ghoul said.
         �You built the thing?� Kim asked, as Becky preoccupied herself with 
squashing the remaining leeches, making a kind of sport of it now.
         �Yuck!  You too!  Yuck!  Oooh, yuck!  You too!� she cried somewhere 
behind us.
         �Yes, I built the machine,� the ghoul said.  �But it doesn�t work.  It 
only goes across the desert.  It doesn�t go back in time.�  Still holding the 
ghoul, I looked at Kim.  The heat outside was becoming unbearable and I 
said,
         �Let�s go in.�  I nodded toward the little hut, which we now knew as 
the top of a vast pyramid.  Wearily I tugged on the ghoul.  He was delighted 
to get out of the sun, and I had no trouble getting him back into the little 
upstairs room, then down the ladder into the bigger room below.  The girls 
followed us down.
         �Yay!  We can go home now!�  Becky cried when she saw the machine.
         �Oboy!� Kim cried.  Both girls ran up to it and touched it.  I wiped my 
forehead.  It was cooler down here, thank God.  The girls stepped into the 
machine.
         �Girls, watch out!� I said.  �I looked at the ghoul.  You built that, you 
say?� 
         �Yes, master,� he told me.  
         �We came here in this,� Becky said to the ghoul, walking out of the 
machine and patting it lovingly.  
         �You did?� the ghoul asked.  
         �Yep!� Kim said.
         �You�re going to take us home in it,� I said to the ghoul.
         �You live in Darkness City?� the ghoul asked.  He looked at the girls, 
at me.  We were healthy, even if we were hot and thirsty.  �You don�t bear 
the burden of the Bite,� he said.
         �The what?� Kim asked.
         �Nobody drains your blood?� the ghoul asked.
         �NO!  Yuck!� Becky said.
         �You are very fortunate,� the ghoul said.  Becky tugged on my pants.
         �Let�s go!� she told me.  Kim looked at me expectantly.  Nervously I 
said,
         �Uh, girls, I don�t know if we should go anywhere just yet in that.�  
Becky stamped her foot.
         �NOW!� Becky insisted.
         �Yes!� Kim said.  Taking the ghoul by the collar, I reluctantly walked 
with him and my two playmates into the magical closet.  It had the same 
dials as I was used to.  The walls glowed reassuringly.  I fiddled with the 
controls a little and then, hoping I�d set the year right, I pressed the 
button that I hoped would take us home.

30

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