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Andrew Roller Presents
GIRL PATROL
Chapter Twenty-Five
�It is a bias,� Vlad said. He was sitting on a lawn chair watching
the moon set out beyond the mountains. They were a darker black against
the reassuring ink of the night sky, the moon a gentle narrow crescent, a
scythe. �All these centuries they have hated us and feared us. But really,
they just didn�t understand us.�
�Especially since we�re so nice,� Alfonse said. Vlad laughed.
�Yes,� he chortled. He straightened his tie, that he�d taken from a
mall they�d been wandering though. The place had been half-gutted, no
power, water dripping down from somewhere. It was so perfect! There
was nothing a corpse enjoyed more, when all was said and done, than
surroundings as destroyed as his own soul and body. It was why, besides
having died there, vampires were often found frequenting old houses, or
graveyards, or decaying castles. �We simply value evil more than good. It
is a value judgement,� Vlad said. He looked at Alfonse, his eyes reflecting
the moonlight. Pale, dead, yet moving. �Are we vampires not free to make
value judgements?� he asked the Italian.
�Indeed,� his silk-suited friend agreed.
�You must tell me who your tailor is sometime,� Vlad said. �The
only one I know that�s any good is a ghoul in Darkness City.� Alfonse�s
eyes brightened. He looked out toward the horizon. �And we�re there,
aren�t we?� Alfonse asked. �Just five billion years too soon?�
�Yes,� Vlad said. �I read a novel once where some poor human fuck
wound up a million years back in time. Actually I think it was four
million,� he said, furrowing his brow. �Can you imagine that? Wake up
and find you�re back before there was anything, anything at all.�
�Amazing,� Alfonse said.
�And now, from my own point of view, it�s happened to me!� Vlad
said. �Everything I know is in some far-flung future, and about to be
destroyed!�
�The sun blowing up,� Alfonse said, and looked at the moon, benignly
reflecting the sunlight coming in from the other side of the earth, the side
where a new day was passing.
�Yes,� Vlad said. �Pity these damn hamburgers never invented space
flight. It would have been so convenient to just fly off to another galaxy
or something, instead of having to fool with time travel.�
�But you are lucky to have stumbled onto the theory,� Alfonse said.
�Yes,� Vlad smiled. His look was suddenly smug. For he was the
inventor wasn�t he? Well, actually he wasn�t, a ghoul had invented the
damn thing, but dear Vlad couldn�t let a human have the credit, could he?
Pity about the ghoul, Vlad smiled to himself. His reward was death. Real
death, for Vlad didn�t want him sharing his knowledge with anyone else.
Something like time travel had to be controlled. The last thing they
needed was the rabble of Darkness City rushing into the past, screwing
everything up.
�I hope you two are having a pleasant evening,� Esmelda said. She
pushed back one of the double glass doors that led out onto the patio and
came out. Vlad turned. His wife looked stunning in a black evening dress.
Alfonse looked, smiled nervously.
�We�re having a very pleasant evening, dear,� Vlad said. He pointed
to the moon. �Look. Lovely, isn�t it?�
�Where is it?� Esmelda asked.
�What, darling? The moon�s right there,� Vlad said, and stiffened
his arm, pointing more directly at it.
�The machine, you dolt!� Esmelda said. �How long is it going to take
the damn wraith-vampires to return it?�
�It homes in on you, dearest,� Vlad smiled. Esmelda glared, her eyes
turning red. Vlad felt the power of her mind invade his, but after several
centuries of living with her he�d begun to learn to resist.
�You shouldn�t have killed the ghoul who invented the damn thing.
We might be able to use him now,� Esmelda growled. Vlad started and sat
up straighter.
�Whatever are you talking about, dearest?� Vlad asked.
�Do you think I�m dumb enough to think you�re smart enough to invent
something like that?� Esmelda snapped at her husband. She balled her
hands into fists and lifted them to her waist. �Hmmm?�
�Uh, no dear,� Vlad said meekly.
�Who invented it?� Esmelda asked.
�Giolo,� Vlad said.
�Ah. Of course,� Esmelda laughed. �You never liked him.�
�I had no emotional response toward him. I was simply hungry,�
Vlad said.
�Perhaps it was a value judgement, ma�am,� the Italian offered,
nervously. Esmelda glared at Alfonse.
�You stay out of this, you half-evolved hamburger!�
�Madam!� the Italian said, taking aback.
�Why do you waste your time talking to someone who�s five billion
years out of date?� Esmelda snapped at her husband.
�Honey, please, you�re insulting our guest,� Vlad said, at last
pushing his wife completely out of his mind. Trying to change the subject
then, for he still feared his wife, even if she wasn�t in his head
controlling his thoughts, he asked, �How�s our little vampire girl?�
Esmelda�s look darkened. At first she tried not to answer but this only
caused Vlad and his Italian friend to lean forward with interest.
�She�s very powerful,� Esmelda said. �Untrained, but powerful.�
Nervously she crossed her arms. �Fortunately she doesn�t know her
power,� Esmelda said. �But my ability to mesmerize her is limited. She�s
dangerous. I don�t want to take her with us.�
�Tch, tch,� Vlad said. �I enjoy her company. She�s charming.� He
turned to the Italian. �Don�t you think?�
�Indeed,� Alfonse said. �Pure evil.�
�Whoever bit her must have a very dark heart,� Esmelda said.
�Truly a darling little girl,� Vlad smiled.
�Child molester,� Esmelda said. Vlad frowned.
�She is very beautiful dear. Even you must recognize that,� Vlad
said. He arched an eyebrow. �Do I detect a note of jealousy in your lovely
voice?� he asked his wife, herself looking deathly gorgeous in the light of
the setting moon.
�Jealousy is a virtue for a vampire. It keeps you alive,� Esmelda
said. She stepped closer to her husband and said, �May I remind you, dear,
that our little visitor is nine. You�re four hundred years old. Don�t you
think you�re rather old to be admiring little girls?� Vlad waved his hand
dismissively.
�I want her to come,� he said. �After all, it�s my machine.�
�Well where the fuck is it?� Esmelda screamed. A bird rose up out
in the desert. The sound of its sudden flapping drew all three vampires�
eyes. The bird tried to fly away but then plummeted back to earth.
�Everything�s dying,� Alfonse said.
�Yes, isn�t it nice?� Vlad smiled. �Sit down, dear,� he told his wife.
He motioned to an empty chair they�d set aside for her. �Obviously there
must be some sort of problem with the machine. We�re safe here. When it
arrives, we�ll go get our special supply of blood down under our wine
cellar. Or shall I get it? You may stay here if you like.� Esmelda frowned.
�I don�t trust the wraith-vampires with our blood,� she said.
�Neither do I,� Vlad said.
�I wish we�d brought some fucking ghouls with us,� Esmelda said.
�Dear, I suggested that. You�re the one who said you wanted to
create a new world, a world for vampires, and that we didn�t need to take,
may I quote your lovely mouth, any fucking hamburgers with us.�
�Well we could use someone now who could follow instructions,�
Esmelda said. Alfonse, sensing an opportunity, raised his right hand
slightly.
�Madam?� he offered. Esmelda glared at him.
�I told you not to talk,� she said. Immediately she invaded his mind.
He reeled. She gripped him but then, after a moment, she sighed and let
him go. It took the Italian a full minute to recover. But when he did, his
mind turned to his favorite subject again, after survival: profit.
�I could do as you wish, madam,� Alfonse said.
�Mesmerism only works if you�ve got the person nearby,� Esmelda
muttered.
�Oh, I would be most loyal, madam!� Alfonse said.
�I�m sure you would,� Esmelda said. Vlad raised his hands.
�Please, please, we�re vampires,� he said. �Obviously the wraiths
wouldn�t be able to resist drinking the stuff, and you wouldn�t be able to
resist bringing it back here and selling it,� Vlad told the Italian. �After
all, when it�s here it will be the only untainted blood in the world. I can
think of nothing more valuable. I will go, and you, also, Esmelda my dear,
will go, because I can�t carry it all and it would be a shame to leave it.�
He nodded to Alfonse. �And you will go too, dear sir, where my wife can
keep an eye on you. And you will help us carry our blood back with no
thought of profit.� The Italian sank in his chair a little. Vlad�s eyes
glowed slightly red, to insure the Italian obeyed. Alfonse nodded, meekly,
suddenly unable to tear his eyes from Vlad�s. Then Vlad�s eyes paled.
�And the little girl, she will go also, especially if she�s as valuable as you
say she is, dear,� he told his wife. �And since she�s dating a corpse who�s
two hundred years old, we obviously can�t leave him,� Vlad said. �If only
so I keep my hands off her,� Vlad smiled at his wife, and she was not
unconscious of the way he�d spoken the wraith vampire�s age. Why, he
himself was only two hundred years older than him!
Esmelda stood up.
�I�ll get your little playmate,� she said to her husband.
�Thank you, dear. You make a wonderful hostess,� Vlad said. A few
minutes passed. The moon set behind the mountains. And then the little
girl came out, lovely and white-limbed, wearing the long black cloak
they�d found her in, with the hood pulled down to show her pretty face and
to let her long hair fall down over her shoulders. She came running over to
Vlad. To his surprise she tried to hop in his lap and kiss him. Then she
succeeded, in kissing him anyway, and in throwing her hands around his
neck.
�Ah, a delicious child,� Vlad said, after Jan had kissed him. She put
her lips right against his, without any thought that his wife was watching.
After all, she was young enough to be his great granddaughter, several
times removed.
�I haven�t fucked a child in a long time,� Vlad smiled under his
breath. Aloud to his wife, who was coming across the porch now with the
little girl�s boyfriend, he said, �So thoughtful of you to bring her, dear. It
will be an education for her, I think.� Jan danced over to her boyfriend.
She took the wraith�s hand. It nodded to her. It solidified a little on the
air and Vlad realized that the creature was eminently handsome. Quite a
competitor, when you got right down to it. �Pity if it got left in the
future,� Vlad smiled under his breath.
30
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