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Andrew Roller Presents
NAUGHTY NAKED DREAMGIRLS
in
BIKINI BRIGADE
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Chapter Ten
Tommy lay in the grass. He had manged to get quite close to the
eclair. It was the same eclair he�d ridden before. It was quite a little
eclair, he thought, and he was a big troll. Maybe he wasn�t big like a
person, but he was big for a troll, and Tommy was mad at the eclair for
dumping him in the Soda Sea. Not that Tommy had asked the eclair for a
ride, of course. But then a troll shouldn�t have to ask for something. It
should just be given to him. Whatever a troll wanted a troll should get.
That was Tommy�s opinion, anyhow. And what Tommy wanted now was a
target.
Tommy raised his two guns. They were long and sleek, with well-
polished barrels. He pointed them at the eclair. He pulled their triggers.
To his great delight, long sprays of marshmellow goo shot out of the guns.
They hit the eclair. It let out a fearful whinny and rose, with some
difficulty, into the sky. White goo was spread all along its side. The goo
weighed it down. It gave small, terrified yelps as it tried to free itself
from the goo and fly properly.
�Ha! Ha! Ha!� Tommy laughed. He stood up in the grass. �That will
teach you, eclair!� Tommy yelled. �I�d better not see you feeding near my
swamp ever again!� He turned and walked into a grove of cypress. He
walked along the bank of his marshmellow marsh. �I�m Tommy the Troll,�
Tommy said happily to himself. He swung his guns on his hands. �Tommy
the big, important troll!� And then he sang a song,
�Oh, I�m big, bad Tommy the troll!
Do you think me droll?
Then I�ll shoot you right through to your soul
Because I�m big, bad Tommy the troll.
The very terrible troll!�
Just then there was a crashing sound behind Tommy. He whirled
about, only to see the eclair he�d just shot smashing its way down through
the trees. Furious, still laden with cream, the eclair attacked Tommy. It
was like being hit with a big flying log. The eclair hit Tommy from behind
and sent him flying. Tommy lost hold of his guns. The eclair caught them
as they spiraled out ahead of it, through the air. Tommy fell into the
marshmellow swamp nearby. But the eclair managed to catch Tommy�s
guns with its big pee hole. It rose swiftly up through the trees, clutching
them in its mouth.
�Curses! My guns! Come back here with my guns!� Tommy wailed to
the eclair. Then he sank deeper into the muck of the marshmellow marsh,
and his last words, blurted out to the escaping eclair, were �BLUB!�
�Well, it�s nice to be in civilization again,� Matilda Brunswald said
to the little old woman. Her name was Peanut Brittle Polly. She owned a
small home in the middle of Peanut Province. They were in her sitting
room. Matilda, Al, Wilma, and Glenda sat with her. They held delicate
peanut brittle cups. They were drinking peaunt butter tea.
�So where are we, again?� Glenda Guilty asked the old woman. The
woman reached up and patted the bun of her white hair.
�Why, Peanut Province, dears,� Peanut Brittle Polly said. She sipped
her tea. �You are welcome to stay as long as you like.�
�We�re looking for two girls,� Matilda said. �Two little girls. Their
names are Katie and Bambi. They�re runaways. They need to be put into
Child Protective Services.�
�For their protection, of course,� Wilma added.
�Well we all need protection these days, I imagine, with Licorice Lad
in charge,� Peaunut Brittle Polly said.
�You don�t actually have to remain in character while we�re speaking
to you, do you?� Matilda asked. �I�ve heard of actors who stay in
character, even when they�re not playing a role, but the matter of the girls
is important.�
�Government business,� Glenda said.
�Say, are there any candy apples around here?� Al asked, gazing out
the window. �All I see are fields of peanuts. And lots of little midgets
running about, in peanut costumes. This must be some movie you�re
filming.�
�Quiet, Al,� Matilda said. �Madam, two girls are lost on your movie
set. We�re trying to find them. If you see them, don�t let them out of your
sight! Just keep them here. Send one of these midget people on up the
road. We�ve been following the road outside for some time now. And
we�re going to keep following it, I suppose.�
�Alright, dears,� Peanut Brittle Polly said. �But, really, you should
stay the night. I have plenty of peanut brittle I can feed you.�
�Mmmm!� Al said. Matilda glanced out the window. The sun was
setting.
�Well, I supppose we must,� Matilda said. �No use going on any
farther today.�
�Do you have anyplace to bathe?� Glenda asked.
�There are pools of steaming peanut butter near here,� Peanut
Brittle Polly said. She stood up, carefully, setting her cup on a small
table next to her and reaching around to touch the small of her back.
�Come, dears. You do look rather bedraggled. I�ll show you where you can
wash up,� she said. �Sorry, I�ve got arthritis,� she added. She reached for
a cane leaning against the table where she�d set down her tea. Grabbing it,
she said, �Come! Come! Peanut Brittle Polly will take good care of you.
Don�t you worry!�
30
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