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Welcome to the Church of The Reverend Cotton Mather.  This story is
the sole property of the author, and may not be copied or downloaded 
for the intent of profit. Permission is freely given for anyone to 
download or copy for their personal pleasure or use, as long as 
there is no intent to charge money or barter for the privilege of 
acquiring this material.

   (Copyright 2005, revisions c. 2007, R.C. Mather)

E-Mail all comments to RevCottonMather at hotmail dot com
Don't be shy!  I enjoy hearing from you.

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THE COMPETITIVE EDGE:
PLAYING THE GAME III

A Novel

by R.C. Mather



- 38 -

DESIRE AND INTIMACY



It was very early when I woke up the next morning. Erin and Alex
were next to each other, with Alex's arm sprawled across Erin's hip
as they slept. I got up quietly so I wouldn't disturb them, brushed
the cobwebs off my teeth, and threw on some clothes. Alex's keys were
on the kitchen counter. I took them and opened the door as quietly as
I could. The wind and rain were still battering the house, but the
storm seemed calmer than when we were driving through it. The eye of
the hurricane was further north and Tybee Island was being whipped by
the rotating mass at the edge of the storm.

I was pretty wet by the time I got in the car. The turns Erin had
made getting us here in the dark were confusing, but I figured I was
on an island. How lost could I really get?

It turned out I could get pretty lost, even on an island. I managed
to wander around until I found the shopping district. There was one
lonely little convenience store, a mom-and-pop operation that was
open for the few locals who stuck around through the storm. I found
enough staples to keep us for a few days. I bought milk, bologna,
bread, orange juice, microwave popcorn, some ground beef and buns,
pancake mix, syrup, and eggs. That should hold us.

It took me about a half hour to find a landmark that looked
familiar, but I managed. I hauled my packages into the house and
dumped them on the kitchen table. Erin had gotten up and started
making coffee. She was in the shower, and Alex was still asleep on
the floor. I found a frying pan and put it on the stove. I mixed up a
batch of pancakes and ladled the batter into the frying pan. While
the first batch was cooking, I poured myself a cup of coffee. I also
poured a glass of OJ for each of us, and decided to give Erin hers. I
knocked on the bathroom door and opened it just a crack.

"Want some juice?" I asked.

She giggled. "Are you offering?" she said from behind the shower
curtain.

"Orange juice," I said.

"Oh. Too bad."

She turned off the water and threw back the shower curtain. I stood
there like a dummy, clutching the glass of orange juice, as I watched
her unconcernedly reach for a towel.

"And here I thought you were offering something else," she said with
a smile. "A little shot of Porter Potion, maybe."

I stared at her as she began to dry herself off. "No tan lines," I
managed to stutter.

She looked down at her body, and then she looked back up at me with
an unreadable expression. "How about that," she said.

"I take it you sunbathe in the nude a lot."

She smiled tightly. "You could say that," she said.

"Privacy fence at home around the pool? What about your brother?"

"Actually, we spend most of our summers at my Aunt Susan's place.
She's got a campsite that's very... private."

I handed her the glass. She took it and took a sip, all the while
gazing at me. It was strangely erotic, not surprising considering I
was standing in the bathroom, alone with a naked and very attractive
girl.

"Uh... pancakes," I stumbled, suddenly remembering my cooking.

Erin giggled as I scrambled for the door. 'How do they do that?' I
asked myself for about the thousandth time. 'How do they get me so
flustered while they stay so calm?'

I found my way back to the kitchen. Alex was awake and was minding
the pancakes for me, a cup of coffee in one hand. She was dressed in
just a tee shirt and panties, her hair tousled from sleep.

"Hey," she said. "Is this your handiwork?"

"Such as it is," I said.

"Here, take over," she said, handing me a spatula. "Gotta go pee-pee."

I continued with the manufacture of breakfast, trying hard not to
think about Erin sunbathing nude at her Aunt Susan's place. I was
just putting a big plate of flapjacks on the table when the girls
came out. They were sort of dressed, in a casual and half-naked way.
I could only sigh. It was going to be a trying weekend among such
temptations.

"What shall we do today?" asked Alex as she reached for the platter
of pancakes.

"Why, go to the beach, of course," said Erin enthusiastically.

We could hear the wind howling, and even though the rain was
slackening, it was not a pleasant day, despite the moderate
temperature. I looked at Erin doubtfully, but she was not to be
denied. I refilled my plate, determined to go meet my destiny with at
least a full stomach.

Alex cleaned up the kitchen while Erin searched a linen closet for
towels. We were going to need a bunch of them. She came back into the
main room with an armload. The girls took their bags into one of the
three bedrooms and changed into swimsuits.

Since I hadn't been able to bring anything, I didn't have anything
to change into. I grabbed my poncho and waited by the door for the
girls.

The weather was continuing to gradually improve, though it was still
nasty. We were within walking distance of the shoreline, but Erin
suggested we drive over to a different beach, over on the landward
side of the island. We got into the car, and Erin picked her way
along one-lane avenues, across the island to a tiny spit of beach
facing the coast. There was one other car in the small parking lot,
but I didn't see anybody. 'Another foolish tourist,' I told myself as
we opened the car doors against the wind.

We left the towels in the car. They would have blown away if we
tried to put them anywhere. They would have gotten as soaked as we
were getting, anyway. We had to lean into the wind as we walked out
onto the hard-packed sand. Stingers of blowing sand tried to rip away
pieces of my skin until we got closer to the pounding surf. Then it
was sea spray taking off the first few layers of epidermis. The waves
were huge, over five meters, the tops foaming and breaking off in the
wind. The sea was an angry gray-green color, roiling and bubbling as
the next breakers built. The three of us stood side by side, facing
into the wind, and we leaned into it, letting the wind hold us up. I
held my arms outstretched and leaned further, feeling as if I was
dancing along the point of balance. It felt as if the wind was going
to pick me up like a kite and let me float away. It was the closest
sensation to flying untethered I had ever felt, and I laughed for the
sheer joy of it. The rain plastered my hair to my head, and seawater
combined with the rain hit on my face and in my mouth.

I glanced over at Erin, standing next to me. The wind was whipping
her t-shirt, plastering itself to her body. She was laughing into the
wind, looking for all the world like an aspect of Pallas Athene, the
Goddess of Storms. Beyond her, Alex was dancing in the sand, letting
the wind whip her hair around, completely happy in this element.

So, I realized, was I.



* * * * * * * * * *



We spent the rest of the morning playing on the beach. We dared the
ocean by running out into the receding surf, retreating when the
pounding waves attacked. We only went out about knee-deep, but even
that was risky. I could feel a strong undertow even that shallow. No
way was I going to go any further into it. The girls followed my
lead, dancing out into the water and running back to shore, laughing
and squealing in the rain, the wind, and the salty spray.

It was exhausting, this creation of fun in adverse conditions. I sat
down heavily on the wet sand to catch my breath. I thought I was
sweating heavily, but the air was so full of moisture collecting on
every surface that I couldn't really tell.

Alex and Erin collapsed down on either side of me. They looked as
bedraggled as I felt.

"Food," said Alex. "Food and drink."

"And shower," I added. I leaned over and picked at my shorts. The
sand in my underwear was beginning to irritate me.

"Feed me first, Porter," said Alex. "Then shower."

"A creature driven by your stomach, aren't you?" I asked.

"Let's just say I'm a creature driven by certain... hungers, shall
we?" said Alex with a mischievous grin. She scrambled to her feet,
and then held out her hands to haul me up. "And right now food is
what I crave."

Alex pulled me to my feet, and I reached down and helped Erin up.
The three of us, pushed by the wind, stumbled arm-in-arm-in-arm back
to Alex's car.

There was no point in trying to dry off in the rain, so we spread
dry towels across the seats and got in. Erin drove us back to the
house, and we made a mad dash to get inside. I pulled off my soaked
shirt, but decided to put up with the sand for a little longer and
left my shorts on. I dried myself off the best I could, and I padded
into the kitchen to get some sodas while the girls toweled off.

I found a saucepan and filled it about halfway with water. I put six
of our eggs into the water and put it on the stovetop. I turned
around in time to see Alex and Erin, both completely naked, settling
on the couch in front of the television.

"Just call us when lunch is ready," said Alex with a chuckle.

"I'm a slave to women," I muttered.

"You're our hero," swooned Erin in a high, silly voice. "How can we
ever repay you?"

They couldn't keep a straight face, though, and they collapsed
against each other as they both burst out laughing. I could feel my
face burning as I turned away to finish preparing lunch. My
imagination was frothing with thoughts of payments and paybacks,
along with silent questions of the costs.

While the eggs were boiling, I took a shower. It wasn't until I
finished and I was drying off that it occurred to me: I had no dry
shorts. Or underwear. I wrapped a towel tightly around my waist,
determined not to walk around naked in front of both girls.

I walked determinedly out of the bathroom. The girls had torn open
one of our bags of chips to fortify themselves while they waited for
me. I self-consciously walked over to grab a handful of chips. As I
bent over, I felt Erin tug at my towel, and she managed to whip it
off before I could grab it. She tossed it over the couch behind her.
She had a devilish gleam in her eye.

"I think we're starting a new tradition. A No-Clothes Weekend." She
turned to Alex, who was sitting beside her, trying to look innocent.
"What do you think, love?"

"I think that's a great idea," said Alex. She couldn't hold her
serious expression, though, and she began smiling.

I suddenly felt like a piece of cheese in a houseful of cats. With
as much dignity as I could muster, I picked up my towel and wrapped
it around me again. I walked away from them, back to the kitchen. I
heard Alex whisper, "Yum," but I pointedly ignored the comment. Two
naked girls in the house, and I was the nervous one. Go figure.

Alex's attitude was a studied nonchalance, almost a challenge. She
dared to be nude. Erin, on the other hand, was completely comfortable
in her skin, absolutely unconcerned about her state of undress.
Erin's perfectly even tan, contrasting with Alex's pale breasts and
groin, forced me to conclude Erin spent a great deal of time outside
and out of her clothes, and probably in the company of others.

And me? Even with Alex's deliberate attitude and Erin's relaxation
in being naked, I was neither nonchalant nor comfortable. I needed
some small cover-up. 'Why is that?'

'Ah, well. Something to ponder some other time. Lunch calls.'

There was mayonnaise, sweet pickle relish, and mustard in the
fridge. Once the eggs were finished boiling, I put them in cold water
and added a few ice cubes. While they were cooling, I spread out lots
of bread and got out a bowl. I peeled the eggs and mashed them with a
fork, and then I added the mayonnaise, relish, mustard, and some salt
and pepper. I spread the egg salad on the bread, and then I cut the
sandwiches diagonally. I made one sandwich for each of the girls, and
two for me. I had the feeling I would need the fortification.

While I was fixing lunch, Erin got up and went into one of the
bedrooms. She came back out with a small bottle in her hand, which
she set on the floor by the couch. Then she walked over to the front
door, where the girls had left their bathing suits and shirts. She
gathered them up and took them into the hallway. She opened a closet
door, and there was a stacked washer and dryer. She put the wet
clothes in the washing machine and started it.

"Can you grab my stuff too?" I asked.

"Already did," she said. She favored me with a smile. "It's the
least I could do for my favorite chef."

She went back into the front room to rejoin Alex, who had the
television on. The local stations, apparently deciding the hysteria
had passed when Diana left the state, had resumed their normal
broadcasting. I brought the sandwiches out on a plate and set them
down on the coffee table. There was a rerun of "Green Acres" on, and
Erin and Alex were pretending to be interested in it.

"Good show?" I asked as I sat between them. I picked up a sandwich
and took a big bite.

"Oh, yes, the best," gushed Erin.

"Those Gabor sisters really knew how to act," added Alex.

"Mmm...hmmm," I mumbled, deliberately incoherent.

The girls couldn't hold it. They both began laughing, leaning
against me. I kept on eating, desperately trying to forget I had two
beautiful, naked girls sitting next to me. It was difficult, but I
managed to keep it together enough for the thought of food to take
hold of the girls. They both reached for a sandwich and settled back
to enjoy lunch.

Erin got up to get a glass of milk. I started in on my second
sandwich. It was sloppy eating. I leaned over the back of the couch
and asked Erin to bring in some paper napkins.

"Got 'em," she called out.

I glanced over at Alex, who was leaning against the arm of the couch
with her feet up on the table. There was a dribble of egg salad on
her chest and running down between her small breasts. She waited
until she saw me looking at her, and then she slowly put her finger
in her mouth, got it nice and wet, and then she gathered up some of
the spilled egg salad from her body and sucked it off her finger. She
looked into my eyes the entire time, enticing me, daring me. I sat
rooted to the spot. No way was I going to take up that invitation,
even though I could feel my towel begin to press against my expanding
cock.

I looked away. 'Chips. Chips are good.' I grabbed a handful and stared
at the television while I munched on them. Out of the corner of my
eye, I saw Erin come around the couch.

"Oh, poor baby, you spilled," she said.

It was enough to make me glance over, and I was lost. Erin was
leaning over Alex, her delectable ass jutting out, and she was slowly
licking up the dregs of egg salad from between Alex's breasts.

Erin paid no attention to me sitting beside them as she cleaned up
Alex's spill, and then proceeded to lick and suck on her nipples. As
Erin's tongue began their magic, Alex put one hand gently behind
Erin's head, caressing her. I sat back to give them a little more
room. I wanted to walk away, give them some privacy, but it was too
fascinating to watch.

'Like a car wreck,' I thought disjointedly.

Erin's mouth slipped from Alex's left breast over to her right, and
Alex's other hand found Erin's fuller breast and was gently squeezing
it, testing its firmness. I longed to do the same, but I stayed where
I was. This was their game, and I was merely an observer.

Alex's hand on Erin's neck was encouraging her to move lower. Erin
resisted for a time, content to tease Alex's hard nipples with gentle
bites and sucking. I watched as Erin let her fingers trail down to
Alex's thigh. Alex, in more of a reflexive action than a conscious
decision, let her legs relax. I could see her pussy lips were swollen
and damp, expecting Erin's touch.

Erin was patient, though. Her hand lingered near Alex's knee, and
then languidly teased up her inner thigh, approaching but never
touching Alex's center. I was impressed with Erin's control. I felt
like I was ready to dive in, but Erin was taking her time, letting
Alex build up, holding her anticipation and manipulating her climb.

Erin moved down and began to lick and tease her way across Alex's
midsection. I watched, enthralled, as she tickled the small patch of
hair above Alex's slit, and then bypassed what I could only
categorize as "The Good Stuff." Instead, she continued down Alex's
body, kissing her thighs, gently lifting her leg to lick behind her
knee, and continuing down her calf to her ankle. By this time Erin
was kneeling in front of Alex, turned three-quarters away from me as
she concentrated on pleasing her friend. I was the forgotten party,
and I was not about to disturb them. This was good, guilt-free
pleasure to observe.

I watched, fascinated, as Erin took the bottle she had brought from
the bedroom and squeezed out a small amount of liquid. I couldn't see
the label, but it must have been something okay to digest, because I
smelled a faint scent of cherries as Erin rubbed it between her
hands. She then grasped Alex's right foot and began to massage the
fragrant oil in, paying special attention to her toes. She did the
same to her left foot, and then she began to nibble on Alex's toes
with her lips and tongue, laving up the taste of the cherry-flavored
body oil. Alex began to squirm a little on the couch. I thought maybe
she was uncomfortable, until she moaned.

'She's turned on, way turned on,' I marveled as I watched Erin, a
master at work. She worked each toe, starting with the big toe and
working her way down, spending an increasing amount of time on each
toe as she went. When she was done with the left foot, she returned
to Alex's right foot and gave it the same loving treatment. By the
time she was done with the baby toe, sucking on it as if it was a
tiny cock, Alex was nearly beside herself. Her hips were rolling back
and forth, she was pinching at her own nipples, and her eyes were
squeezed shut.

Alex couldn't hold still at all as Erin squeezed another small
amount of scented oil into her hands and began to rub up Alex's leg.
She gently worked Alex's calf muscle, moving from her ankle to her
knee, and then she grasped Alex's leg behind her knee and bent her
leg up toward her body. She nibbled at the back of Alex's knee, and
then began to lick and kiss her way up her thigh, making Alex pant
and moan. Still Erin took her time, drawing out Alex's pleasure,
until she - and I - could hardly stand it. Erin finally gave Alex what
she wanted, what she needed, by running the flat of her tongue
through Alex's tender folds, lapping up the copious lubrication she
was exuding. Alex grabbed the back of Erin's head with both hands and
held her mouth to her pussy, and Erin obliged. I could see her
working between Alex's clit and her opening, using her fingers to
hold back her pussy lips as she teased and worked her. She used her
lips to tease and pull on the tender flesh, and Alex pushed herself
harder against Erin's mouth as she finally climaxed. Erin continued
to stimulate her, pushing her further and further along, until Alex's
body seemed to be undulating under the intense signals being flashed
from her core to her overstimulated brain.

Erin began panting, and she arched her back as she knelt between
Alex's splayed thighs. She had three fingers plunging occasionally
into Alex's passage, keeping her on a heightened plane. Finally, I
could stand it no more. I needed to get out of there. I stood up, and
my towel fell from my waist. My cock, as hard and rampant as it had
ever been, was sticking up and proud in front of me. I needed to go
into the bathroom or the bedroom, anywhere, and relieve myself.

I never got the chance. When I stood up, Erin looked over at me. I
could see desire swimming in her eyes.

"Please, Sean... I need it... Please..." She was practically crying
for lack of release as she helped out Alex.

What could I do? I was a weak, frail, and faulty human. I stepped
behind her. She looked at me pleadingly, and then gratefully as I
knelt behind her, holding my cock in my hand. I ran the head of my
cock up her distended pussy lips, holding plenty of moisture of their
own. Her dusky lips parted easily and caressed the red and swollen
head as I placed my rampant cock. I twisted my hips just a little,
feeling my helmet settle into Erin's heated and welcoming opening,
and I flexed. Erin groaned and threw her head back as I slowly
entered her, and her fingers, in a sympathetic action, pushed into
Alex at the same time. All three of us, connected together, felt the
rush. I shafted fully into Erin, until my belly was tight against her
ass. I held her hips so I could get full penetration, and Alex took
hold of Erin's head in the same fashion.

By then, I was lost. I had been stimulated beyond reckoning watching
Erin and Alex, and I knew it would not be long before I spilled my
seed. I began to flex my hips, working my cock into her, reaching for
her most sensitive areas, fucking her hard. Erin put her head down on
Alex's belly, her fingers still buried in Alex's pussy, and took all
I could give her. I reached around her and grabbed her breasts,
squeezing the flesh and pinching her nipples, and she reached up with
her other hand and did the same to Alex.

Somewhere in the distance, I heard Alex cry out, followed almost
immediately by Erin's breathless moan as she climaxed. I was on my
own journey of release, pounding into Erin's body as hard as I could,
triggering the mechanisms that would deliver my seed. I felt my body
clench, and my brain went blank for a moment as the trigger was
pulled. I pumped, reset, pumped, again and again, until there was no
more to give. And still I worked my hips, my movements becoming
ragged and uncoordinated as my climax wound down.

I stayed in her until I started to lose rigidity, resting on Erin.
Erin, in turn, rested her head on Alex's tummy. When I felt myself
start to soften, I pulled out of Erin and sat down heavily on the
floor.

I was supposed to feel satisfied, happy, content, sated. 

'Why don't I?'



* * * * * * * * * *



The wind was dying, and the rain had just about stopped. The sun had
gone down behind the roiling clouds, and it was quiet in the house.

It had taken me some time to shake off my lethargy. Erin had gotten
up and put our clothes in the dryer. I took out my shorts, still
damp, and tugged them on. I put on the same shirt I had worn that
morning, laced on my shoes, and walked to the door.

"You're going out?" asked Erin. She looked a little concerned.

I waved her off, though. "Going for a walk," I said. "I'll be back
in a bit."

I thought I would take a nice, quiet walk in the rain. I forgot how
fierce the storm had been. As soon as I began, I had to lean into the
wind to make any headway. It was quite a bit weaker than it had been
this morning, but it was still very strong. All my limited brainpower
was taken up with operating my motor skills. I had nothing left to
use to work out my issues.

Still, the time alone, just me and the foul weather, turned out to
be good for me. My legs got a good workout, and my subconscious had
the opportunity to do its job without any interference from the
cognitive part of my male brain.

I walked into the wind for about an hour, stepping over branches
that had been pulled down into the street by the storm, until I began
to feel a little light-headed. It was odd how you felt like you had
to work harder to draw a breath when you were facing into a strong
wind. I had no idea how far I had gone, but at least I had followed
just one road. I turned around and began my journey back toward the
house. I was shocked to discover it only took me about thirty minutes
to return, walking with the wind. By the time I opened the door and
shucked off my soaked clothes, I felt better. Not great, but better.



* * * * * * * * * *



Erin cooked up some hamburgers for us for dinner. The storm had
begun to die out after it moved inland, quite a bit north of us in
North Carolina. We watched a little bit of television after we ate.
Erin pulled out one of her textbooks and read while Alex did the
dishes and I took a shower. When I got out of the bathroom, I could
tell Erin and Alex were preparing for bed. I decided I would leave
them alone for the night, so I padded to one of the small bedrooms
and quietly closed the door.

It was quite late when Erin came into the bedroom. I was propped up
on the headboard in the dark. I had the lamp on the nightstand
switched on, and I was reading "Soccer Today." The lights in the main
room had gone off about an hour prior, and I thought the girls had
probably gone to sleep, so I was a little surprised when she appeared
at the door.

"Why so quiet, Sean?" she asked softly.

I just shook my head. She slipped onto the bed and snuggled up next
to me. She put her head on my shoulder, and her arm rested across my
belly. I had my dried shorts on, but Erin was still naked. I put my
arm around her shoulder.

"Aren't you enjoying our No Clothes Weekend?"

I glanced down at her. "I'm just not a No Clothes Weekend kind of
guy," I replied.

She laughed, a deep and throaty sound. "Everybody is a No Clothes
Weekend kind of person at one time or another."

I chuckled. "Not everybody," I said. "My parents aren't the No
Clothes Weekend type."

She lifted up and looked at me, smiling. "Wanna bet?"

"Huh? You don't even know my parents."

"How many kids did they have?" she asked.

"Uh... three," I replied slowly. I saw where this was going, but my
mind had a hard time wrapping itself around the concept.

She looked at me. "You're thinking about it, aren't you?"

"Yeah," I said with a grimace. "And it's not the prettiest picture."

She began toying with the arrow of hair that ran from my belly
button down to the patch of pubic hair. "Three kids," she repeated.
"You can bet they had a few No Clothes Weekends in their day."

"Thanks a lot for that image," I said.

She slipped her hand beneath the elastic of my running shorts and
began playing with my sleeping cock, awakening the beast. I felt it
begin to expand, just as she let her fingers dip down to explore my
sac.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked softly as she played with me.

"I'm trying very hard not to think about my parents," I replied, a
little defensively.

I reached down and stopped her hand, lifting it gently from my
shorts. That was too much of an attractive diversion for me. When I
did that, she looked up at me.

"You're thinking about Kayla," she stated. Not a question, a
statement.

"No. Yes. Ah, hell, I don't know what I'm thinking."

"But you don't think sex with me or Alex... or sex with me and Alex...
is a very good idea right now."

I felt foolish. Here I was, alone in a house with two naked girls
who wanted to boff me, and I didn't think it was a good idea? 'What
the hell is wrong with me?'

I tried to change the subject. "You certainly seem quite comfortable
with the No Clothes Weekend concept."

She chuckled. "You could say that."

"Actually, I thought I did say that. But I got a big clue this
morning when I brought you the juice. No tan lines? Big clue."

"Yeah, I suppose it is," she said. She glanced up at me and smiled.
"Does that shock you?"

"A proper Southern belle from the heart of Georgia running around
nekkid in front of other folks? Why, it's practically scandalous."

"And don't forget the sex-shual relations outside the marriage bed,"
she said. Her hand began its journey back down my shorts. She was
nothing if not persistent.

I gently held her wrist before she could change my lizard mind by
her actions. "Erin..."

Erin pushed herself up to sit next to me on the bed. She crossed her
legs, sitting Indian-style. She folded her arms beneath her breasts
and looked at me seriously.

"I'm going to say something to you, Sean, that you are not going to
understand. At least, not yet. Okay?"

I shrugged. "Okay," I agreed.

She took a deep breath. "I love you, Sean."

I groaned, let my head fall back to rest against the headboard, and
closed my eyes. 'Shit on a stick,' I said to myself.

"I love you as my closest male friend," she continued. I opened my
eyes and looked at her. I didn't know what I was expecting to see,
but I really didn't expect to see her smiling like she was. "But I
don't love you as a boyfriend."

I felt like I had just been whipsawed. "Huh?"

She put a hand gently on my chest, making sure she had my fullest
attention. "You're a great friend, and I love you," she reiterated.
"Alex is a great friend, and I love her, too. It's okay to love
people, Sean. It's okay to have friends you care deeply for, and yet
have no interest in marrying, or having kids with, or living together
happily ever after."

"Okay, I understand that, but..."

"Do you, Sean? Let me explain something about... me. About my...
family, about my beliefs." She looked seriously at me. "Hear me out?"

"Of course," I said.

She lay back down next to me, resuming her position on my shoulder.
I scooted down to make it more comfortable for us. My chin rested on
the top of her head. I could smell her shampoo; I could smell the
essence of Erin. I felt a surge of affection for her, and a beginning
of understanding what she might be saying.

"Did you ever hear your parents talk about The Summer of Love or The
Age of Aquarius, things like that?"

"Yeah, a little, I guess," I replied.

"Well, I think there was a certain amount of truth in what they had
tried back then. If you remove the aspect of promiscuity from that
philosophy, it makes sense to me. I think of sex as more...
recreational... than a lot of people do, Sean. That's not to say I
don't choose my... partners... with care. I do. In fact, I'm
sometimes over-analytic about it. But I tend to separate desire from
intimacy. I mean like the intimacy of marriage, or at least a
commitment to another person. That's a deeper intimacy, to me, than
sexual intimacy."

"Uh-huh," I said, though I really didn't follow what she was saying
very well.

She craned her head to look up at me for a moment, and then resumed
her position. "Look at it this way. I am not in a committed
relationship, and neither is Alex. You aren't either. Right?"

"Right," I agreed, albeit reluctantly.

"So, from my perspective, if I find you desirable, and I want to
sleep with you, I'm not impinging on anybody else's emotional
landscape. It's just sex, Sean. It's biological, with some emotional
attachment, but it doesn't have to be intimacy. And I do want to
sleep with you, Sean. Because I love you, and I think we make good
bedmates. We please each other. It's important to please each other,
to support each other. That's what friends are for."

"Intellectually, I understand what you're saying, Erin. I'm just not
sure I'm wired that way."

She chuckled, and I felt the vibration all through me. "You're a
guy, Sean. You're wired that way. You just have some emotional
overlayments that inhibit it." She lifted up her head again, and then
she stretched up and gave me a soft kiss. "And I love you for it."

"In that case, I guess I can say I love you too, Erin Hughes," I said.

She smiled, and I could feel it against my skin. "I know you do, but
it's still nice to hear," she said.

This time, when she reached for me, I did not resist. That's what
friends are for.





(Continued in Chapter 39)


  
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