Chapter 36 ~ Rape
Border Patrol Officer "Mitch Whitman," known as John Branch in a former life, sat in his weekly briefing at headquarters where news and changes to assignments were handed down. He was listening to another update about the capture of two notorious Coyotes that he pretended to have never met. They were still getting dressed down by the Department of Homeland Security for the Texas Rangers making the capture, and "Mitch" was tired of hearing it so he was daydreaming about the two little ladies he had waiting for him at home, one of whom was very little, and the other very pregnant. As the regional chief droned on about the capture he mentioned that it was two girls who were instrumental in their apprehension, Samantha Taylor and Mary Donners. "Mitch" suddenly started paying attention. Without waiting for leave he asked, "Excuse me chief... but what was that second name?" It was repeated, and John Branch was suddenly very interested in this case.
++++
Summer was over, and everyone was getting ready to go back to school. Ashley and Lucy went back-to-school shopping together at La Mercada, both of them feeling like their lives were just beginning and anything was possible as Ashley bought stuff for her new year at college, Lucy for her senior year of high school. They bought each other engagement rings as soon as they returned home from Texas and Lucy's mom was hoping for a wedding as soon as Lucy graduated. They happened to be in the same coffee shop where they'd met... they loved coming here together... and were sipping on iced cappuccinos when Lucy's phone gave a message alert. Absently she grabbed her phone and looked at it, and almost started putting it down when she held it back up and looked at it again.
Ashley watched her as she began swiping and pressing the screen as her eyes got wide. "What is it?"
Lucy was quiet, reading. Finally she looked up at Ashley. "It's Erin. Her name just showed up on Google as an incoming freshman at some college in Nebraska."
Ashley looked back at Lucy with wide eyes. "You just have her name? Are you sure it's the same Erin?"
Lucy looked down, clicking more. "There aren't any pictures.... I just have her name. But it's her full name."
"What college?" Ashley asked, and when Lucy told her Ashley started typing on her own phone.
Lucy thought for a moment, then started typing a text to Chief Hawkins.... wrote a few words, but then decided this warranted a phone call.
But Chief Hawkins had just gotten the Google Alert as well, and was already looking into it. He wasn't sure how far into it he could... or should... investigate, but his first reaction was to look into it as far as he could on his own time without using city resources. He told Lucy as much when she called. "I should be able to at least get a picture of this girl, I think," he answered, though he had no idea if colleges still posted pictures of students online. "Hell, I'll hire a private investigator out there, if I have to," he told Lucy. He assured her he would let her know the moment he found anything, if there was anything to find.
Linda was home... in her 8th month of pregnancy, but there had been some spotting in her underwear a couple weeks ago and her OB/GYN had ordered her to stay home and in bed for the last month of her pregnancy. She hated it but Larry suddenly became stern, demanding she do exactly that. She hated being bedridden but loved him for caring so much about her and their baby. She agreed with him when he sat to talk to her about Erin.... she thought he should do what he could, without, basically, getting caught. "If she's actually out there in Nebraska.... she's made no effort to contact her mother. That alone tells me something is wrong."
"I agree," Hawkins answered. "I'll do what I can."
In the end, all Chief Hawkins could get was a social security number from some admissions administrator at the school. He was disgusted how easy it had been, he just pretended to be a student loan collector and purported to be looking for a student skipping out on her loans. When he read the man Erin's social security number, the man at the college confirmed it was their Erin.
Now there was just the question about what he could do about it.
He talked to Linda... listened to her advice, and then against his better judgment called Lucy back and asked if she could come over.
It wasn't difficult talking Lucy into visiting the campus. The school Erin was at started classes that day, Lucy's school started in four days, Ashley's college started in three.... and Ashley insisted Lucy was not going without her. Nora also wanted to go, but her school on the other side of the city from Lucy's started tomorrow. Linda was the one who asked Lucy if she wanted to take on the mission, and Larry tried to talk her out of it... "There may be danger. Whoever was holding her may be there watching her. And..." he hated thinking of this... "you remember I told you, the kids that come out of that place... the ones I met... aren't right. She may not be the same girl you remember." But Lucy was having none of it. While they were still sitting there Lucy was on her phone already booking a morning flight for her and Ashley out to Nebraska.
None of them slept well that night.
++++
Erin was happy.
She was enjoying her new surroundings.... so long since she'd left the walls of the compound. Her new roommate at school had been selected for her. Lillian was nice, quiet, rarely speaking above a whisper. She had been a homeschooler, and never played music in the room aside from recorded church hymns, sometimes... nor did she ever wear inappropriate or revealing clothing, just like Erin. Erin's favorite ensemble was now an ankle-length dress and sweater.... Autumn in Nebraska tended to be chilly. Sometimes the sweater she wore was one that buttoned down the front, but sometimes not. She kept her black-dyed hair short, no styling aside from a hairbrush after she showered, and she eschewed makeup.... those kinds of affectations only invited the attentions of the wrong sort. Mother had taught her that. No heels, she preferred plain slip-ons. Pantyhose at all times. Plain cotton underwear. All things a proper young lady would wear.
Erin was happy. It must be true because she kept telling herself so.
Saying goodbye to Mother at the compound had been emotional for her, she truly had not wanted to leave. She told Mother she was afraid, she didn't know what she would do without her, outside of those walls. Mother merely held her face in her hands, "You are a strong, proper young lady, now. In moments of doubt just ask yourself what I would do in your situation, and I know you will make good choices."
Erin thought that was wonderful advice, and hugged Mother one more time.
The drive in the van had been long, but she was content to look out at the endless fields of... nothing.... and let the knowledge that she was out of that place finally wash over her.... even if it took a while to really sink in. She kept having dark flashes... the Room of Reflection... the pain... being dragged out of some.... place... screaming.... in the middle of the night. But like a dog shaking off the rain Erin shook such thoughts out of her mind. That was the past, and her sinful past meant nothing to her. Now, she was a proper, strong young lady. Mother had said so. Erin smiled.
She was so happy. She showed the world her teeth in her smile so everyone could see how happy she was.
She loved her dorm room, so much space, the bed sinfully big... so much bigger than the padded cot she had slept on for the last two years. She almost asked her RA if they had something smaller, but when she thought of the penalty of asking questions without permission she had a sudden image of pain and screaming behind her eyes... so kept that request to herself. But that was fine, she smiled, because she caught herself in time. She secretly wondered if her fellow students would... entertain... others in those bed. She found the thought distasteful.
And she liked Lillian in spite of the fact the girl... smelled... a little bit. She smelled like a penitent who had spent a couple days in the Room of Reflection. Lillian said in her religion to use soap on her body was sinful, and Erin nodded, and smiled. One must obey the tenets of the religion of one's parents. Obviously. But Erin smiled so Lillian could see how happy Erin was, how everything was right in her world.
Her classes had been picked for her, most of them Freshman required classes like English Comp. Erin had tested out of the Freshman Math class, much to the delight of Mother who praised her mind effusively. Erin was almost embarrassed, but understood that proper young ladies paid attention in their studies in order to make it easier to find an appropriate young man. Erin had been naturally inquisitive, once upon a time. On her first day of her Intro to Sociology class she almost raised her hand to ask a question... but again began the images of silent screaming... and stopped herself. She smiled, instead, so wide.
Erin didn't know it, but the compound administrators had paid for her first year of college by applying for student loans in Erin's name... something that some at the compound darkly joked was the most evil thing the compound had ever done to Erin Jennifer Banks. But Erin was no longer their problem, her money had run out, and her own mother was still in no condition to receive her home, so they did what they did... sent her off to college in a state far from where she came from, far from anyone who had known her and would ask questions. That had always worked before the internet age.
And Erin was so happy. Those first days of setting up her new life before classes were to begin, she smiled so much her jaw would ache at the end of the day... Erin didn't remember her jaw had once been broken.
The compound also set Erin up with a prescription for medication from the local pharmacy.... Erin had begun getting migraines at the compound. Erin didn't remember, but she had once been in a coma with severe head trauma. That was all just a bad dream from her past, an echo of a memory. In her new life, none of that mattered.
Erin was so happy but some nights the pain in her head was so bad she sobbed quietly in her bed. It wouldn't do for Lillian to think Erin wasn't happy so she was careful to stay so quiet, crying into her pillow.
Because Erin was happy. She kept telling herself that, because it was so true.
++++
Lucy and Ashley were getting frustrated. They hadn't been able to scam a copy of Erin's class schedule, even when Ashley claimed to be Erin at the administrative offices saying she had lost it and needed a copy. They wouldn't even talk to her without a student ID, so the girls were stymied. It was the same with the student directory, trying to find out in which dorm she was living... everything was on a school intranet, and they needed a student logon to access it. They even tried to steal a logon, they looked over a girl's shoulder in the student union, and they thought they'd gleaned her user ID and password. But when they tried they got the girl locked out of her account. So they sat in the quad and watched the hard way, it seemed to be the busiest part of the entire campus of 6,000.
They sat on a bench facing away from each other so they wouldn't be looking at the same people. They were looking for a girl with blonde hair, and on the first day Erin had walked within 10 feet of them but they both only caught the back of her head... with its short, black hair... after she'd gone by.
The second day they didn't see her at all, they were both upset when they left the campus long after the last classes and the sidewalks were empty, except for the students visiting friends and lovers in other dorms. Their flight home wasn't until the next afternoon, so they decided to get up extra early and check out of the hotel, and then sit on campus in the morning with their bags until it was time to catch an Uber to the airport at the last minute.
At first Lucy's eyes passed over Erin's face, registered the black hair, and looked away. But then she looked back... the black haired girl... about 30 feet away... looked like it could be Erin... she was a little too tall, but it had been two years of absence... and she was petite like Erin... but she was dressed like... some TV mom from 1950, with a long dress and sweater. As the girl got closer Lucy could see her eyes, so blue, Erin couldn't disguise that. And this girl was looking at her schedule, trying to find a building, it was still her first week. Lucy saw this girl was biting her lower lip, just like Ashley did. "Ashley.... there," Lucy said in a whisper, afraid that if she were too loud the girl would spook and run. She didn't yet know how true that was about to be.
At first Ashley overlooked her too... so many other students walking by, her eyes passed over the black-haired girl.
Lucy noticed. "She has short black hair, look, coming toward us." Erin was now 10 feet away, about to pass by in the crowd.
"No way...." Ashley said, summarizing in two words every emotion they were both having right now.
Lucy stood, Ashley followed. The girl went by. "Erin," Lucy tried to call out, but her voice was choked up. "Erin Banks," she finally said too loud, and the black-hair girl turned, smiling too wide.
It must be one of my fellow students from class, Erin was thinking.... when she saw who it actually was. She lost her smile. She couldn't breathe.
"Erin, it's us... we found you..." Lucy said, stepping toward Erin who suddenly looked terrified. Erin was mouthing something, or trying to. Erin fell to one knee, holding her throat.
"Erin... what's wrong? It's Lucy and Ashley... we've been looking for you... what's wrong?" she asked, kneeling next to Erin, taking her arm trying to keep her steady. Up close she could hear what Erin was wheezing...
"A good girl does as she is told. A good girl does not fornicate. A good girl does not lay with other girls." Erin seemed to be saying it so fast, over and over, doing her best to catch her breath. In Erin's head, the little glass room, so long empty, suddenly had an occupant. This was all happening so fast... Erin so close to losing control... everything was instantly slipping away from her. Part of her head was screaming. Part was shutting down, forgetting how to breath. One part wanted to fall asleep, another wanted to flee, to run so far. But this part.... this room, from where Erin once controlled her emotions.... so long dark... was suddenly aware. Her old self image, the little 8 year old girl, how she used to picture herself back when John first loved her, had been hiding... and now she was back... she banged on the glass walls of the room desperate for escape. Banged on them so hard, hoping Lucy and Ashley would see her, find her. Banged on them knowing this may be her last chance. Erin felt the stab of the beginning of a migraine.
Lucy and Ashley, now on either side of her, didn't understand. Erin seemed to be distressed... she was saying those words, over and over... it seemed like she was having trouble breathing. Erin was drawing attention.
"Erin... what is it... how can I help?" Lucy asked.
Lucy's voice brought Erin out of her panic. She stood, screamed, "No! You are not here! A good girl does as she is told! A good girl does not fornicate! A good girl does not lay with other girls!"
Off to the side, a woman said sardonically, "Sometimes we do, sweetheart."
Erin hadn't heard, didn't pause. "A good girl honors her parents! You are a ghost and I don't know you! Get away from me!" And Erin ran. In her mind, the windows of the little glass room turned opaque. The little girl stood still, silent, her arms hanging limply, her head bowed. That had been her last chance. The little room grew dim, dark. Empty.
Lucy and Ashley, so confused, tried to follow... but two campus security police happened to be there and stopped them. "Hey girls, what seems to be the problem here?"
Lucy looked up at him, tall and fat. The other holding Ashley's arm was short and fat. Lucy tried to shake her arm free, but couldn't... and part of her really disliked being touched like this without her permission. Her anger showed on her face, "Let go of me," she jerked again, but the man was too strong. "My friend is in trouble and I need to go to her."
"It didn't sound much like she thinks she's your friend," Tall Fat said with a sneer. "Let's see your student IDs."
Lucy turned to Ashley... Short Fat wasn't restraining Ash any more, just hovering and invading her personal space. Lucy tried to show Ash she was stuck...
Ashley wasn't sure she understood, and didn't like the way that pig was touching her Lucy, but thought Lucy was hinting to go find Erin. Without thinking about it Ashley faked left, then ran right, and even in heels leaving Short Fat in her dust.
The security officers looked at each other, both of them knew they would never catch a young girl who was actually in shape. Tall Fat took his walkie talkie off his belt but was fumbling it, still trying to hold on to Lucy with one hand.
She took this opportunity to tell him softly, with ice in her voice, "If you don't let go of me right now I am going to report that you attacked me. I'm sure I already have bruises from your hand on my arm." Tall Fat looked down at Lucy, and saw the calm sincerity in her eyes. He let go. Lucy took her arm and stepped back a pace rubbing her elbow, Tall Fat had on too much Axe Body spray and it was turning her stomach. "We were just talking to our friend, she is having problems. Just let it go. God, what is wrong with you," she asked him with naked disgust. Lucy was seeing visions of Mary biting off a man's penis when he had touched her without permission.
Short Fat turned to his partner, "We gonna call this in?"
Tall Fat just looked at Lucy, he saw something in her eyes, something that made him uneasy. He had a very strong feeling he would be much better off forgetting he ever saw this girl. "Just..." and he was going to say something flippant, try to get back his control of this situation... but he couldn't think of a single way to do it. "Just keep it down," Tall Fat said to Lucy. "Come on," he said to his partner.
Short Fat considered Lucy for a moment, who met his gaze, and followed his partner.
Without hesitation Lucy grabbed their bags from where they'd been camped and followed where she'd last seen Ashley running, following Erin around a corner.
Ashley hadn't had to run far, as soon as she turned that corner she saw Erin leaning against a bike rack, trying to catch her breath. As Ashley slowly, quietly coming closer she heard Erin crying... openly sobbing... "No... I can't.... no.... I am a good girl.... I can't..... please help me Mother.... tell me what to do.... please help me...." and Ashley could see the tears falling to the pavement.
Ashley was a few feet from her. "Erin..." she said softly.
Erin hadn't heard her approach. She stood up straight, startled. "You..." she said, pointing. "Slut... whore.... lesbian.... you are a demon sent to lead me to hell." Mother was helping her, now. She asked herself what Mother would do... and she remembered what Mother actually had done when she first took Erin under her wing. Mother had shown Erin she was a slut, and a whore, and a lesbian, laying with other women, and that wasn't right, and that was a path to hell. Mother now spoke through Erin.
Erin's words struck Ashley like a slap. "Erin," she said... "Why? What's wrong? We've been looking for you for so long.... don't you..." and suddenly Ashley had an inkling... "Don't you remember?"
"I remember you and the others keeping me from true happiness, from finding my purpose!" Erin cried out. "You kept me down with you in the pits of your misery! I was fine before all of you!" That's what Mother had told her.
Lucy now turned the corner and saw Erin shouting something at Ashley, she ran toward them.
"Before both of you!" Erin now included Lucy in her accusations. "I was a happy girl, I could have done anything! Every time I had a chance for happiness you kept me on a path to hell!" Erin was beginning to feel a tightness in her chest, and a migraine... she almost never got them in the mornings like this... began to pound behind her eyes.
Lucy and Ashley looked at Erin, suddenly holding her fists to her temples, eyes squeezed shut, choking off her words.
Lucy took this opportunity to try to speak, "Erin... please... we love you... let us help you... something is wrong..." remembering the Chief's words, those people I found from the compound... they aren't right. Be careful.
Erin opened her eyes, looked at both of them intensely. "I don't know you, either of you. Go away, don't ever come back. I don't know you and I don't want to." Erin turned, and walked into the building... she managed to get to a stairway, away from prying eyes, before she fell to her knees and cried.... for what, she did not know.
Lucy turned to Ashley, they looked at each other silently. Lucy began to cry, looking for Erin for so long, finding her like this. Ashley held her, doing her best to hold back her own tears but not doing a very good job of it. "What's wrong with her?" Lucy asked.
Ashley looked up to the tall buildings, "I don't know honey... in psyche class they talk about conditioning and Stockholm syndrome and stuff, but I'm not... like... really qualified to diagnose it or anything. But something is seriously wrong with her. That wasn't her."
"Chief Hawkins was right," Lucy said. "That place messed her up. We have to help her."
Ashley nodded, and wiped a tear from her eyes. "We so do. How?"
Lucy frowned. "I don't know. What do we do... do we.... stay? We can't leave her."
Ashley thought about it. She considered, she thought out loud to her love, "We found her. We came out here and found her. That is huge, ok? That was the hard part."
Lucy nodded, wiping her own face.
"We can't stay... but we don't have to. We have friends... Erin has more friends. Let's catch our plane and make plans. We'll call everyone before the plane takes off, let everyone know we found her, and how she is. They might have a plan before we even land in Florida."
Lucy nodded at her. "She looks so bad..."
Ashley frowned, "I know. But Lucy... we found her. We finally found her."
Lucy smiled up at her Ashley, and they hugged.
Before they left Lucy shouted at the building Erin had escaped into, "We're going to be back, Erin! We're going to come back and help you!"
Erin hadn't heard, she was still in the stairwell on her knees, praying for help, fighting the blackness that was threatening to swallow her alive. She chanted her words, "A good girl does as she is told. A good girl does not fornicate. A good girl does not lay with other girls. A good girl honors her parents," over and over. It was all she knew. Her Words were the only lifeline she could see and she reached for them desperately. Finally.... it began to help.
++++
From the airport Lucy made calls while Ashley was setting up a group conference on Skype, Chief Hawkins first, Mary and Sam, and Linda, home and bedridden. Nora was in school and her phone went straight to voicemail, but Lucy left her one. Everyone got themselves in a position where they could get on Skype and talk about what Lucy and Ashley had discovered.
Lucy and Ashley gave the story to them as closely as they could, omitting nothing. After they were all quiet, and Lucy asked Linda what, in her professional opinion, she thought. "Erin seems to be a very troubled girl." She grimaced, "I know that's an understatement, but I'm trying to keep it light. Wrong decision. She needs help, and quickly. She could hurt herself."
Lucy nodded, "Yes... that's what I had been trying to think but I didn't want to. She seems like she's on the edge... of something. She was barely holding it together."
Chief Hawkins was feeling guilty. "If I have to, I will be on a plane to there tomorrow. If I go, it's my job, they'll fire me. But if we can't think of any other plan, I'll go get her."
In the window, Linda Marcus was nodding her head with a smile on her face. That's my man, she was thinking with pride.
Lucy continued, "Me and Ash are starting school tomorrow and the next day. Nora's in school. Linda's on bed rest, Larry will get fired." All of them looked to Mary's window, she was sitting there with her eyes closed, she had known since the beginning this was coming. Somehow... she always knew she'd be the one, here, and now. She'd known since the day Erin had tried to save her next to John's pool.
"I'll go," she said softly. "Of course I'll go." She didn't want to go. She didn't want to go anywhere without her Sam... they hadn't been apart in years, literally never more than 100 yards from each other in all that time. But the herds were being pulled in, it was time for the Autumn vaccinations, and this was one of Sam's busiest weeks. Mary knew she couldn't ask Sam to come with her, because Sam would say yes without hesitation. I'm scared, but... "I'll go. Please send me all the information you have on her, where she is, her class schedule, whatever you have. I'll find her, and I will bring her home. I promise" She took a deep breath, she felt her tears coming. "I'm going to go... make arrangements, talk to Sam. I'll call you all back when I have my plans together. I love all of you," and she killed Skype.
Lucy touched the part of the screen where Mary's window was now black, "We love you too, Mary..."
++++
It was the same helicopter that had flown out with her friends, she was only taking the one bag and the man in the flight suit quickly had it loaded and waited by the hatch patiently. Junior had joked he was going to need to make the big temporary H into a permanent concrete landing pad if this kept up. Mary smiled at his quip but it was forced, and Junior knew it.
He took her into his big, dusty, sweaty embrace, out in the yard. "I know you don't want to go. This is the first time you've been away from us in years, do you realize that?" he said to her.
She just hugged him harder, hiding her face in her father's chest. Of course she knew.
"You're my daughter now, and you know... you know deep down... we bring in strays. We help them that are lost. And you're doing it automatically, going to help this girl you barely met just once, and you already love her. I am so proud of you, honey. You're my girl."
Mary smiled, squeezed him hard. "Thanks daddy."
Junior pulled away and looked at her. "You go get her. You get her and bring her home."
Mary looked up at him, and smiled as he kissed her cheek. Then he discretely made himself absent so Sam could say her goodbyes.
"I'm sorry I have to go, Sam... if you need me to stay to help with the vaccinations, I will."
Sam just smiled at Mary, taking both of her hands. "Shut up," she answered with a smile. "Don't start being all scared on me, now. Satan would never recognize you."
Mary pulled her in close, hugged her. "Sam... I.... am afraid."
"Afraid of what, honey."
"I've never been away from you... from this place.... before... when I was out there... I was...just so scared, all the time...." Mary said, now hiding her face in her Sam's shoulder.
Sam wanted to cry, Mary exposing herself like this broke her heart. "Honey... whatever you were before you came here... that girl is long gone. This girl here traveled a thousand miles from home to live with people she never even met. She fell off a horse her first day and when she got back on she flew. She stared down a furious, hurt stallion and befriended him. She fought two evil men who wanted to hurt me, and you saved me. You think this place saved your life, Mary? You think we did? You saved ours, honey. This place... us... the whole world is better because you are here. I love you, and I always will. Now go help your friend, she needs you. She needs exactly you."
Mary looked into her Sam's eyes, and sighed. "Oh Sam," she said.
"Me too," Sam answered. They shared one last hug and Sam walked away, she didn't want Mary to see her beginning to cry, not now. Mary had enough to worry about today.
++++
Mary took the helicopter then the jet and then the Uber to her hotel just across the street from the campus. She had been wrapping herself in a cloak of invisible armor, an armor made of the ranch, and thoughts of Sam, and her new parents, and even her horses. The seams of the armor she filled with the love she felt for them all, the love she knew they returned. She again walked through the world alone, but this time unafraid. The way she carried herself made everyone give the small woman a wide berth, even on the busy campus full of distracted, rushing young adults. Sidewalk traffic flowed around her. They sensed something about Mary, and they unconsciously respected her space.
Mary hadn't really made a game plan, but she knew what to do. She had talked to Lucy and Ashley for hours, made them repeat their efforts to find Erin twice, every moment, what had worked, and what hadn't. It was late afternoon by the time Mary walked straight to the college administrative offices. She found an open window, "Hi, I'm Erin Banks, I lost my student ID."
The bored woman behind the window didn't even look at her, "Do you have any other form of ID?"
"No, I lost my entire purse, I think it was stolen. But I can answer any security questions or whatever."
The woman now glanced at Mary. "Social Security number?" she asked, and Mary recited it quickly. She had studied Erin.
The woman keyed it in and pulled up Erin's file, and her student picture. Small girl, fair skin, black hair. The girl before her was tanned, her black hair a little longer... but the woman didn't think much of it. Hair grew and students tanned out on the quad all the time, and freshman photos never looked the same as when they were seniors. She didn't pay enough attention to see Erin was a freshman and her picture was only a week old. Mary had rolled the dice.
Punching a few keys but without another word the woman said, "Go to the counter at the end, they'll give you the new ID, the $10 fee will appear on your student account."
"Thank you," Mary said with a smile. At the counter she waited a few minutes and took her new, still warm ID down to the other office where she could get a copy of Erin Banks's school schedule.
According to the schedule right now Erin had a two hour break between classes, and her last one of the day was a comparative religion class in some building where Mary had no idea where it was. She went to the student union and found a campus map. By the time she walked to the correct building Erin had already been in the class for ten minutes, assuming she was on time. Mary hung out sitting on the front steps watching the stragglers, none of them were Erin.
++++
Erin was in that building, in her class, in the front row. She liked to be in front so she could focus on the class, and not the people in the rows in front of her. Still in her first week she was meeting all these professors for the first time, and she was pleased that this one seemed to look at her.... pay more attention to her... than any other student in the class. He even seemed to gaze at her when he called her name during roll call. He wasn't attractive or anything, he was sort of stocky, middle aged, his brown jacket sort of threadbare, and he had on a wedding ring... not that she was noticing, or anything. But Erin was excited... and happy, she kept reminding herself. She'd taken her migraine medicine that day after Lucy and Ashley had found her, had slept for 18 hours, and she had felt right as rain when she woke up. She was in class and happy to be learning and the professor seemed nice. Everything was perfect. He spent the class going over the syllabus for the semester. He said he was firm but fair in grading, but as long as the students did the reading they should have no trouble in his class.
Finally, ten minutes early, he said, "Well that's about it. I'm not going to start any lectures today, so just make sure you read chapters 1 and 2 for next week, and I'll see you then." Students started closing notebooks and stuffing backpacks. "Miss Banks," he said to Erin. "Could I see you up in my office, please?"
"Of course," Erin smiled. Maybe he wants to make me a teaching assistant, she wondered excitedly. She followed him through the door in the back of the classroom, up two flights of steps, and into his office. He allowed her to enter and closed the door behind her, throwing his satchel on the floor next to his chair, taking off his threadbare coat and hanging it on a hook. He sat behind his desk, looking at her intently.
Erin started getting a little confused. "Was there... something you wanted?" she asked him, holding the smile on her face.
"Yes there is," he said strongly. "Penitent, kneel."
++++
Mary stood as students began filing out, looking for Erin. Short, black hair, she kept reminding herself, wishing Lucy or Ashley had thought to get a picture of her. Mary's memory of Erin had been as an 11 year old girl with long blonde hair. But Mary knew she'd never forget Erin's eyes. Students came out, then about ten minutes later more students, and Mary began to wonder how many classes were in this building. Wondering if Erin had skipped class, she waited.
++++
Before Erin knew what was happening, she was kneeling in her professor's office before his desk. She knelt before her conscious mind even had time to realize the command he gave... and that he had called her a penitent. But her body knew. Her body remembered the punishment when a penitent was not quick in obeying a command. Instinctively she folded her hands in front of her awaiting her next instruction, even as her mind was saying no, no... wait.... this isn't right. I am no longer a penitent....
"As I thought," he said in delight, now walking around the desk next to Erin. "Penitent, face me," he commanded, and Erin adjusted on her knees to be facing him. "You look confused," he said.
Erin realized his crotch was right in front of her face.
"My wife is a graduate of the Oklahoma Compound for Wayward Children. She taught me all the commands they used to use on her, and how they still worked after all those years. I've had a lot of fun with that."
Erin's heart was beginning to race. She knew this wasn't right. She wanted to stand... but... couldn't.... she hadn't been given permission.
"My wife was always... I don't want to say frigid in bed, but she was definitely conservative. She didn't have my tastes," he said, unzipping his pants. "My appetites. But when I learned the correct commands, suddenly she would do anything I wanted."
Erin, horrified, watched as he let his pants drop, and his cock was growing erect in front of her face, sticking out from the slit in his boxer shorts. No... no no no..... no no no no no no no no..... she moaned to herself.
He stepped forward, the head of his cock touching her chin. "Penitent, suck it." Before she knew what she was doing, she opened her mouth and took it in. She closed her eyes but the tears fell anyway.
++++
Mary was confused. No more students had come out in a few minutes, and she took a walk through the lower halls. Many classrooms, all empty. In one she found someone packing up papers and ducked her head in. "Hey, excuse me, was this the comparative religion class?"
Without looking up the young man said, "No, that would be Ben Schmidt's class. He teaches in 114, down the hall."
"Thanks," Mary said ducking out and heading down the hall, she heard the man say, "Welcome," just as the door shut.
She found 114.... empty. She took a deep breath, collecting her thoughts, wishing she had found out which dorm room Erin was in before the admin offices had closed.
++++
One floor above Mary, Erin took the man into her mouth, and her throat. Long out of practice, no conscious memories of when she was good at this, but her body remembered. Erin sucked his cock lovingly, crying and near panic. She had not been given leave to stop. She couldn't stop. A penitent always follows order and does her best.
Ben Schmidt looked down at Erin, it had been a long time since another compound girl came through, and none of them had been as hot as Erin. He always checked the freshmen roster to see where the kids came from... when their graduating school said OCWC, he would excitedly begin making plans to meet them.... usually girls, sometimes boys, it didn't matter. And here, little Erin, was all signed up for his class on her own. And she was really good at sucking cock. She was getting him close to cumming, and he didn't want to, yet.
He pulled back out of her mouth. "Damn, girl, that wasn't your first time."
Erin, sobbing, took a chance... she knew the penalty for speaking out of turn, but this... was too much.... "Please... sir... I am no longer a penitent... this..." she wanted to say this isn't right, but the penalty for correcting a superior was three days in the Room of Reflection and Erin visibly flinched at the thought. "Just please... I am not a penitent any more," she repeated.
He looked at her, his glistening cock throbbing in front of her face. "Penitent, stand up."
Erin stood, grateful he had understood his mistake. She smiled. "Thank you, I..."
But before she could finish her sentence he spoke over her, "Penitent, bend over and put your hands on my desk."
Again her body betrayed her, and before her brain could process what he had said she was already doing it, bent over his desk. She looked forward in horror as she heard him move behind her.
He looked down at her, small girl, I wonder if she is under 18 and here on an age waiver. It wouldn't be the first time. "Nice," he said, looking at her ass which looked perfect even under that big long dress. He reached down and lifted it, he knew she wouldn't move a muscle until ordered to. He lifted her dress and bunched it all up on her back. He looked at her ass held snugly under panty hose and cotton panties. "You compound girls are all alike," he chuckled, ripping her pantyhose off of her.
Erin gasped when she felt his hands on her violently ripping her pantyhose. She suddenly felt the cool air on her exposed thighs. Then she felt his hands on her again, and he pulled down her panties. Horrified... frozen.... she heard him mutter, "Oh my god..."
His cock throbbed, Erin had the nicest little ass he'd ever seen. He reached down between her legs, felt Erin's hairy pussy. "Penitent, you will shave yourself bald before your next class with me. Do you understand?"
"Yes sir," Erin obeyed without thought, already thinking she might have to buy a razor, she didn't shave anything any more. She wouldn't need to until her wedding night, or so she had thought.
He rubbed her, slid his fingers between her labia. "Not turned on, huh? You'd better hurry, because I'm not going to wait long." She couldn't see but he was rubbing his cock, keeping it hard as he stood behind her violating her with his fingers.
After a few minutes of that, Erin fighting the scream building inside her, she felt him grab her hips yet again. Her eyes got wide as she felt two hands on her hips, and yet something... else... pressed against her vagina. "Penitent," he grunted. "You will fuck me now," and he drove into her.
Erin wasn't ready. She wasn't even close to ready, and it had been a long time since anything had been in her vagina. Even before her mind had been wiped and rewritten, she wouldn't have been ready for him, the way he was. But now... suddenly returned to penitent status, and the horror that implied.... and the knowledge that the compound was not over, and that it may never actually be over... and she knew she was being violated.... Erin was bone dry. He drove into her. She couldn't even scream, the shock of it was too much, it wasn't until the third thrust when her delicate vaginal walls began to tear under the dry friction that she finally screamed.
In her mind, the little glass room... all of the windows suddenly exploded outward. The old deactivated control panel with its one, barely lit indicator light, the one that was marked "Self," suddenly shuddered, and smoke began pouring out of the controls and seams. Suddenly it burned, it burned until it was a pile of molten slag in a sea of broken glass. The only place the little girl inside of Erin... the only place she could stand.... be... exist...was gone.
++++
Mary had given up, Erin must have skipped this class. She was out in the darkness walking away on the sidewalk 40 feet from the front of the building when she thought she heard something. She stopped, cocked her head back. There... there it was... it sounded like a scream. And it made her think of when Erin screamed when her uncle had hit her that day, so long ago. She ran back to the building.
++++
Ben Schmidt noticed her pussy had suddenly gotten slick... "Yeah baby, I knew you'd come around. You like it, don't you. You like being a good little penitent whore." He drove into her hard, fast, rocking her body with every thrust.
Erin whimpered in the pain... physical and emotional.... in the violation of it.
Ben began to worry about the noise... she had screamed, there might be someone in the building. "Penitent, be silent."
Without thought Erin's mouth closed, her only noise now only her ragged breath through her nose as she was brutally raped.
Ben was getting close to cumming again, and he wanted to finish in her ass.... he knew he would get to fuck her all semester but he was excited and wanted to hit all the bullet points tonight, as it were. He pulled out of her pussy, saw his hard cock covered with blood. Some dripped on his carpet. "Oh," he idiotically asked. "Were you a virgin? How sweet." He placed his bloody, dripping cock at her ass, and pushed. Erin tried to be silent and was almost successful as her sphincter tore.
Ben didn't stop, he took her violently, blood pouring from Erin's vagina, turning her white panties, bunched around her knees, red.
Erin was beginning to feel light headed, happy that, at least, the pain was beginning to go away.... when she felt him bury himself in her butt... and hold... and she felt him convulse within her. From far away she realized he had finished inside of her. Maybe now it is over.
He held her hips jamming himself as deep into her body as he could as he came in her, over and over. His wife's ass no longer gripped him like this, I'm really going to have a good semester, he thought to himself. He finally pulled himself out of her and noticed how much blood followed his cock out of her body. For the first time it occurred to him that this might be a little more blood than was normal. He looked closer, blood was running down the inside of this girl's thighs, and she was now just laying on his desk breathing hard, not even trying to hold herself up any more.
Uh oh.
"Penitent," he said, trying to think. "Get up and.... get dressed. Fix yourself."
I have to get her out of here, he thought, considering his own safety. I can't have a girl bleeding out in my office, how would it look?
Erin picked herself up, head spinning, holding onto the desk with one hand to keep herself steady while she reached down and pulled up her panties with one hand, soaked red with blood, eyes and face blank.
Ben looked down, there was now a pool of blood under her feet. He began thinking about the janitor's closet down the hall, there would be cleaning supplies in it to cover this up.
Erin looked pale and woozy to him as she pulled up her panties and let her dress fall around her ankles.
"Penitent, get out of here. Go to your dorm and..." he was thinking fast... "take a shower and go to bed. Go. Now."
Erin left without grabbing her book bag, following her orders. She walked to the back steps she had come up, trailing blood with each step, feeling so tired, her legs weak. She hurt between her legs, sharp pain with each step. She opened the door to the back stairs and entered them, beginning the long two flights down leaning heavily on the hand rail. Home... go home and go to bed.... she thought to herself. But no. No. She didn't really think she would be doing that.
++++
Mary checked all the downstairs classrooms again, all empty, even the one where the man had been before. She found the front stairway, headed up. More hallways, more rooms. She was at the opposite end from Ben Schmidt's office, and the opposite end from the back stairwell Erin had just gone down. She began checking empty offices, all unlocked for the cleaning people to come in that night. There were so many.
++++
Erin stumbled home, looking for all the world like a girl who had started drinking early this Friday night. Darkness comes early in Autumn in Nebraska, and even under the occasional streetlight none of the other students she passed noticed Erin was trailing blood from her shoes, her red-streaked legs hidden under her long, thick dress. Erin hurt, but she realized she knew how to make it stop. She knew how to make the compound stop. She knew how to make everything stop. She had finally figured it out. She looked at her dorm, up ahead, her room on the 5th floor, the very top. For the first time in so long, while losing so much blood, her smile was genuine. It was the tallest building on campus.
++++
Mary finally made her way to the correct office, she first noticed the trail of blood leaving this room and going to a different door. She opened up, saw a man with a scrub brush in his hand pouring some kind of detergent on a red spot on his carpet.
"Young lady, my office hours are over. Come back tomorrow if you need something."
Mary looked at him. Looked out at the blood trail leaving the room. "What did you do..." she said softly. Mary didn't have time for him, she had a feeling something terrible had happened... and was about to happen. She looked the man in the eye, looking back at her. He looked scared. Mary was glad he looked scared. She was coming back for him. She marked him in her mind.
She followed the trail of Erin's blood.
++++
Erin was making a bright red puddle in the corner of the elevator as she rode up alone. She kept playing through her mind her roommate Lillian saying she would be at a prayer meeting at her church off campus until almost midnight. I will be alone. Alone when she made it all be over. Finally over.
++++
Outside on the pavement the trail was not hard for a desert girl from Texas to follow. She smeared a red droplet with the pointed toe of her boot, it smeared easily but there was barely a hint of a dry, red ring left. Erin came through here exactly 5 minutes ago. She ran, following the trail. She thought about calling her dad... or the police... but she didn't yet know where Erin was, where to send them. She ran. She saw a bloody slipper on the sidewalk, left it. She ran.
++++
Erin finally got her key in the doorknob, turned it, stumbled in. She tried to close the door but her other slipper had come off and the door didn't quite latch with it stuck in the jam. Erin stood in her dark room, only the desk lamp on. She looked at the window, she saw only darkness without, it matched her darkness within. She began taking off her clothes. She winced as she took off her blood soaked panties, it had begun to dry where blood wasn't actively flowing, and it hurt. Fresh blood splashed out of her and onto the thin carpet as Erin dislodged the plug of a clot that had been holding it all in. Erin sobbed and laughed at the same time. Soon, it will be over. Soon. But first.... Erin grabbed some scissors out of her desk drawer. Without looking she began cutting at her short, black-dyed hair. She was going to do this as herself... not what she had become. The thought confused her... she had no idea who she was any more, or who she had ever been. She cut her fingers sometimes trying to cut her hair, it was so short in places. She noticed she didn't have a migraine, she seemed to always get them in times like this. She knew she was making the right decision.
++++
Mary saw the blood trail heading for a particular building, and followed it through the door. She noticed all the students around, oblivious. How can they not see. Mary was horrified to see the blood went into an elevator.... and she looked... there were four floors above her. Which floor did Erin go to? She pushed the button and called it.
++++
Erin, naked, her hair now gone except for straggles here and there... Erin hadn't wanted to look into the mirror for some reason.... swayed in front of the tall window. It opened outward. She thought there was a screen... but there wasn't. She thought of someone who used to climb into her bedroom window when she was younger, there had been a screen in that window... it was a good memory... but the thought confused her. When she focused on it, it was gone. Wiped. She swung the window open, outward. She crawled up on her roommate's desk, the window started three feet off the floor so one could not accidentally fall out of it. Erin smeared blood on the desk as she knelt on it, and stepped forward on her knees to the sill. She felt the cool night air touch her bare skin. Soon, it will all be over. Erin smiled, this time honestly. It will be better forever.
++++
The elevator door opened, two girls came out giggling, "Watch out," one girl said to Mary. "Someone forgot her tampon," and Mary saw why. She saw the pool of blood in the corner.
It must have been a long ride for a puddle that big... she thought, and Mary pushed the button for 5, hoping. Praying.
++++
Erin took a moment to look down. Not in fear, but curiosity. She had always been a naturally curious girl. She shifted forward just a little more, the window jam painful on her bony knees. She shifted forward just a little bit more, anxious to fly away.
++++
Mary followed the blood trail out of the elevator, down three doors, where it disappeared into a room that wasn't fully closed. She opened it. She looked inside.
Mary was in her uncle's attic. She had been 8 years old. Her older sister, Carly, was in the round window at the end. Their uncle had Mary suck on him for the first time that day, he made Carly teach her how to do it. After he left Carly told her she couldn't do this any more... and she couldn't watch him hurt me, too. She said there was a way they could both be free. She said Mary only had to take her hand, and they would fly away together out of the window and be free from him forever and ever. Carly had begged for Mary to come with her... just please, take my hand... but Mary had been scared. She had been scared to fall. Carly looked at her so kindly. "Mary," she said, "I am so sorry I can't save you. Please forgive me." And then she was gone.
Mary blinked, and there was Erin. She lunged forward.
++++
Erin closed her eyes, leaned forward, the pain in her body forgotten, her smile growing wider. She felt herself tip past the point of no return, and gravity was beginning to take her. It is over.
++++
Mary reached.
++++
Erin felt a tug on her arm. She thought that's strange, and then she was being hauled back. She didn't think to resist... the hands pulling her back were so strong... so strong. They were hands accustomed to holding reins.
++++
Mary cried out at first, she didn't think she had a good enough grip on Erin.... but Erin was so small, and her other hand clamped on to her... bloody? thigh, low down, and pulled her back into the room. She did her best to not bang up her friend too badly hauling her in, but it was awkward and Erin's skin was slick from so much blood. Mary barely had time to register Erin was almost bald. Mary performed a controlled fall catching Erin's head in her lap the way she had once done when a horse tried to kill her and instead fell. When they were finally at rest Mary looked down at Erin, most of her lower body covered in blood.
Erin opened her eyes, so tired. Her eyes rolled, finding Mary's face looking down on her. "Am I in heaven?" Erin asked softly.
Mary smiled, crying, laughing, frowning. "No sweetheart... it's me. It's Mary."
Erin frowned, she looked confused... she only ever knew one Mary... so long ago.... but that was that other life... the one that didn't matter... but now, every control in her mind blown out, the fact that it didn't matter... didn't matter. "I knew a Mary once..." Erin said softly, her eyes growing heavy. She was so tired. "I tried to save her."
Mary laughed again as she sobbed, holding Erin's face. "You did," Mary said. "That was me, you saved me. You saved us all."
Erin's eyes snapped open, looking up at her, finally recognizing her. "Mary?" Erin asked weakly.
"Yes sweetheart, just hold on. Please."
Erin looked up at her, remembering the last time she saw Mary... in her old tattered dress, and that collar, and her uncle being so mean to her that day by John's pool. She remembered trying to save her. Everything was fading. "Mary... are you... ok now?" she asked, finally herself, if only for one last moment. Erin closed her eyes.
Mary pulled out her phone to dial 911 and also started screaming for help... she still didn't know where she was, to tell the ambulance... but even through Mary's screams Erin didn't open her eyes.
Copyright 2017: "Marissa Banks." Rights reserved. Not for reuse without express written consent of the author. All content is purely fictional; any similarities to actual persons or events is pure coincidence. Reader must be of legal age in the judicial area he/she resides. Reproductions of the fiction contained herein or linked from here may not be used in whole or in part without express permission from the author.