This work of fiction is for the entertainment of adults in 
locations where it is legal.  If it is illegal in your location, 
don't read it!  This work is copyrighted.  Reposting or any other 
use is strictly prohibited without the express, written 
permission of the copyright holder.  E-mail me, I'll probably 
give you permission.  I just want to know and control where it is 
posted.  This story may be posted as part of a review or to free-
access, non-commercial archive sites. 

My thanks to Ruthie for her proofreading and suggestions.  Any 
errors you find are my fault not hers.
 
Tell me what you liked, or didn't like.  Please!

E-mail address:  tradesjackofall@hotmail.com

My stories can be found at:
https://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Jack_of_all_Trades/

Copyright 2000 by Jack of all Trades






Peaches

I was driving home from work when out of the blue a favorite old 
joke popped into my head. "Hmm, that might make a good story," I 
thought. I'll leave it up to you to decide whether it did or not.

-----

Marcus Jones had been a farmer all his life. His dad farmed the 
land before him and his father's father before that, etc. The 
Joneses had through cautious investment and backbreaking labor 
managed to accumulate 600 acres of prime cropland and orchards. 
The farm had provided a decent living for the Joneses over the 
years and they had managed to avoid the financial troubles that 
claimed the farms of some of their friends and neighbors.

Last year Marcus had planted winter wheat on 150 acres of the 
farm. Spring brought with it heavy rains that made him late in 
getting his soybeans planted. The spring was so wet that his 
wheat was blighted. He only got about a third of the yield he 
expected on it. Crop insurance helped but it didn't cover the 
costs of the seeds and fertilizer he had used on the crop.

Summer arrived. He was encouraged. His beans were doing nicely 
and it appeared that he was going to have a bumper crop of 
peaches in his orchard. Unfortunately, the moist spring had also 
resulted in a bumper crop of locusts. They devastated his beans. 
In fact, it was so bad that it wasn't even worth the effort to 
harvest them and he had to plow what remained of his beans under.

The loss of two of his cash crops hit Marcus hard. He would 
survive, but it would be tight. By late summer his peaches were 
maturing. Without a doubt this was the best peach crop he had 
ever had on the farm. They were full and plump, as sweet as sugar 
and full of juice. Marcus sold three quarters of his peaches to 
his fruit co-operative and kept the other quarter to sell on his 
own. He figured that if he went door to door he could sell all 
that he had left and make a better profit than if he had sold it 
to the co-op. Every day Marcus loaded up his pickup with peaches 
and drove to various small towns around his farm to sell his 
peaches. He was doing very well, making about twice what he would 
have gotten from the co-op.

It didn't hurt that Marcus was a very attractive man and that 
ladies answered most of the doors he knocked on. Marcus would 
flirt with the women as he sold them his fruit and more than one 
lady bought his peaches just to keep him flirting with them a 
little while longer.

Today Marcus had loaded up his truck and driven over to 
Middleton. It was a medium sized city and Marcus was plying his 
wares from door to door in one of its more affluent 
neighborhoods. Marcus walked up to the front door of a very large 
house and rang the bell.

-----

Stacy Brown was the wife of the most prosperous lawyer in 
Middleton. Actually she was his second wife, wife number one 
having been divorced so that Arthur could marry Stacy. She was 
the classic definition of a trophy wife, having wrested Arthur 
away from his first wife via her sexual skills. The only other 
talent Stacy possessed was spending money, and poor Arthur was 
forced to work longer and harder than he ever had to provide that 
money. Consequently Arthur had less and less time to enjoy 
Stacy's other skill.

Truth be told, Stacy was a bit of a nymphomaniac. Arthur couldn't 
provide her with the tool she needed to scratch that itch when he 
was working all the time. There were other tools she could use 
however and she was using one of those tools right now.

"Oh, God, yes!" Stacy moaned as she rubbed her thrumming vibrator 
over her clit. "Mmmm, it feels so good." She could feel her 
orgasm slowly building inside her. She slid the vibrator down and 
into her dripping snatch, pumping it in and out of herself 
slowly, savoring the sensations. Her right hand slid inside the 
top of her white babydoll nightie to cup her full generous breast 
and tweak her nipple. Her back arched as she took herself to a 
new level. Her breath coming in pants as her arousal climbed 
higher and higher. Her passion-clouded mind vaguely registered 
the ringing of the front door bell. "God damn it all to hell!" 
she exclaimed. " I was almost there."  She dropped her vibrator. 
"Still," she thought, "it might be that luscious UPS driver." She 
went over to the window and parted the drapes. It wasn't the 
driver. "Oh my God, would you look at that," she moaned softly. 
She dropped the drapes, ran to the mirror to check her 
appearance, and then ran down the steps to answer the door.

-----

"Damn, nobody home," Marcus said as he turned and started down 
the steps of the porch.

"Can I help you, sir?" a soft feminine voice called out.

Marcus turned around and his heart stopped. His eyes drank in the 
vision in front of him. Long, curly honey-blonde hair framed the 
face of an angel. Crystal blue eyes stared back at him. Her lips 
were full and ripe. Her breasts were large, but not overly so. 
Her nipples were visible through the fabric of her nightie. Her 
hips flared nicely. She had long shapely legs, the hem of her 
nightie just long enough to conceal her other treasures. Marcus 
knew that his heart had restarted, the rush of blood to his cock 
not being possible otherwise.

"Oh my God, he's hung like a horse!" Stacy thought as she eyed 
the rapidly expanding lump in his jeans. Her tongue traced over 
her lips in her excitement.

"Y-y-yes ma'am, you can," Marcus stammered. It was only through 
sheer willpower that he was able to force his legs to work and 
walk back to the front door. "Ma'am, I'm selling my peaches door 
to door and I was wondering if you would be interested in 
purchasing some of them." Marcus held out a prime example of his 
luscious peaches.

Stacy eyed the peach, a feral smile coming to her face. She 
cupped her breasts. "Are they nice and firm like these?" she 
asked.

Marcus's eyes bugged out of his head as the lady squeezed her 
breasts. His cock strained mightily against the fabric of his 
jeans. "Y-y-yes ma'am, they are," he stammered. "God what I would 
give to get my hands on those," he thought.

Stacy smiled sweetly. She slowly raised the hem of her nightie, 
exposing her pussy to Marcus' feasting eyes. Her fingers brushed 
lightly over her mound. "Do they have nice soft fur like this?" 
she asked.

Marcus groaned as his cock twitched in his pants. "She's a 
natural blonde," he thought. "Y-y-y-y-es ma'am, th-th-they do," 
he managed to stutter out.

Stacy nodded her head and licked her lips seductively. Her hand 
slid downward slowly. She slid two fingers inside her creaming 
cunt. She slid them in and out slowly, biting her lip to keep 
from moaning. She slid her fingers out of her cunt and held them 
up for Marcus to see. "Are they nice and juicy like this?"

Marcus' nostrils flared. He smelled her arousal on the fingers 
held in front of him. He strained to keep from creaming his jeans 
then and there. "Yesss they are," he hissed.

"Let me see," Stacy said as she plucked the peach from his hand. 
She bit lightly into the peach, the juice squirting out of the 
corners of her mouth, dribbling down her chin to drop on the 
exposed flesh of her breasts. The juice slid slowly, ever so 
slowly down the swells into the valley between her breasts. 
"Mmmm," she moaned into the fruit, as she tasted its sweetness. 
Her soft pink tongue snaked out to capture some juice at the 
corner of her mouth.

Marcus stood there in awe. His body trembling as a large wet spot 
appeared on the front of his jeans.

Stacy's eyes clouded with desire as she stepped forward. Her hand 
cupped his crotch, her other hand wrapped around Marcus's neck, 
pulling his lips to hers. Her tongue darted into his mouth. 
Marcus could taste the peach as her tongue traced his teeth, then 
wrestled with his tongue.

Stacy broke the kiss, gasped for air. She tugged at him. "I'm so 
sorry," she said, her voice dripping with honey. "Let me help you 
clean that up." She tugged Marcus inside and closed the door, 
then guided him to in front of the couch. She dropped to her 
knees in front of him, kissing the wet spot. Her nimble fingers 
unfastened his jeans. She yanked the zipper down then pulled his 
jeans and underwear to his ankles. "Oh, God," she moaned. Even 
semi-erect his cock was huge. Her tongue lapped at Marcus' cock, 
cleaning him with short swipes, the way a cat cleans its fur. His 
cock jumped when Stacy's tongue made contact, blood rushing back 
into it. Her tongue swarmed around him, licking up and down the 
shaft, cleaning the residue of his recent orgasm. She sucked his 
balls into her mouth, rolling and massaging each one with her 
tongue. His cock was hard now and Stacy sucked the tip into her 
mouth. Slowly she slid forward, taking him deeper and deeper 
inside her mouth. Her tongue fluttered over and around the head.

Marcus wallowed in the sensations as Stacy started to bob her 
head back and forth more rapidly. His hands fisted in her hair. 
She stopped moving, just the tip of him was in her mouth, and 
then slowly she slid forward. He felt the end of his cock hit the 
back of her throat, then Stacy swallowed, and his cock slid 
easily down her throat, her nose resting against his pubic hair. 
She pumped back and forth a couple of times with short quick 
strokes then slowly slid back up the length of his pole. She slid 
him out of her mouth and smiled up at him, her hand slowly 
stroking him. "Did you like that?" Marcus could only nod. She 
tugged him harder. "I want you to fuck me with this now!" she 
demanded.

"OK," he croaked.

Stacy lay down on the sofa and pulled her nightie up to her 
waist. She reached inside the top and pulled her breasts out. 
Marcus shuffled over, his pants around his ankles and climbed on 
the sofa between her legs. Stacy grabbed his prick and pulled it 
to her hole. She wrapped her legs around his butt as Marcus 
plunged forward inside her.

Stacy's back arched as she screamed. Marcus pounded his cock in 
and out of her, fucking her with abandon. Stacy screamed again as 
her second orgasm coursed through her. Her cunt convulsed tightly 
around Marcus' cock, milking him but still he pounded her hole. 
Stacy's fingers were mauling her nipples, twisting and pinching 
them. Her breath came in ragged short pants as that huge cock 
reamed in and out of her. Her face froze into a tight rictus of 
pain and pleasure as her third orgasm consumed her. Still Marcus 
sawed back and forth inside her as she convulsed.

"Oh...God...you're...killing...me," she grunted out in time with 
his thrusts.

Marcus sped up, pounding into her with a fury. Stacy's head flung 
from side to side as she writhed under him. He could feel his 
balls tightening as his orgasm approached. He buried himself deep 
inside her, ground against her, as his cock erupted and his balls 
emptied. Stacy shook and convulsed around him, her fourth and 
final orgasm ripping through her body. Her back was tightly 
arched, her stomach muscles quivering in both joy and agony. She 
collapsed back into the sofa exhausted. Marcus collapsed on top 
of her, his head cushioned by the soft pillows of her breasts. 
They lay there panting, satiated.

Stacy had never been fucked like that in her life. She laughed in 
joy. "Just how many bushels of those peaches do you have left?" 
she asked.

"I've got five on the truck," Marcus replied.

"And how much are you charging for a bushel?"

"Five dollars."

"I'll make you a deal. If you deliver a bushel of peaches each 
and every week to me I'll pay you a hundred dollars a bushel. Of 
course at that price I do expect special service," Stacy said 
with a grin.

Marcus pushed himself back up and gazed down at the beauty still 
impaled on his semi-erect cock. Her cunt still quivered slightly 
around him.

"Deal," Marcus said with a smile.

-----

The joke? After all that you want to know the joke? Well if I 
must. :>

A farmer was going door to door selling peaches. He knocked on 
the door and a woman opened it wearing only a negligee. The 
farmer stammered out a greeting then told the lady he was selling 
peaches.

She cupped her breasts and squeezed them softly. "Are they nice 
and firm like this?" she asked.

"Yes ma'am, they are," answered the farmer.

The lady pulled her negligee up, exposing the soft down of her 
pussy. "Are they soft and furry like this?" she asked as she 
stroked her fur.

"Y-y-y-es ma'am they are," stammered the farmer.

She slid a finger inside herself and worked it back and forth. 
"Are they nice and juicy like this?" she asked as she pulled her 
finger out and showed it to the farmer.

At this the farmer started to cry.

"Mr. Farmer, Mr. Farmer, why are you crying?" asked the lady.

"Well ma'am it's like this," explained the farmer. Blight 
destroyed my wheat crop, the locusts ate all my beans and now it 
looks like I'm going to get fucked out of my peaches!

End






    

Peaches