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\qc \li0\ri0\widctlpar\aspalpha\aspnum\faauto\adjustright\rin0\lin0\itap0\pararsid1666019 \fs24\lang1033\langfe1033\cgrid\langnp1033\langfenp1033 {\insrsid15688966 Waking Up}{\insrsid4546379
}\pard \ql \li0\ri0\widctlpar\aspalpha\aspnum\faauto\adjustright\rin0\lin0\itap0 {\insrsid2819449
Lisa woke up at thirty-one.
The first tick was subtle\emdash just a simple misclick of the mouse. Mark had said they should celebrate their }{\insrsid3227776 tenth }{\insrsid2819449 anniversary by going on a retreat in the mountains. Lisa had googled \lquote retreat\rquote and
\lquote Colorado\rquote and clicked on the first listing. It was a social club}{\insrsid12524143 .}{\insrsid2819449 }{\insrsid12524143 A}{\insrsid2819449 fter }{\insrsid7894849 skimming the first few pages}{\insrsid2819449
, she got a sense of sophistication and panache; she could see the martinis and well-coiffed members. Lisa clicked }{\insrsid12524143 another page}{\insrsid2819449 and then froze. It was one of }{\i\insrsid2819449\charrsid2819449 those}{
\insrsid2819449 clubs.
Swingers.
Lisa hastily backed up to the Google page and clicked the next link down. Twenty minutes later she\rquote d reserved a room at a suitable bed and breakfast.
Impetuously, she wore her short lacy purple nightgown to bed that evening. Mark\rquote s eyebrows went up in surprise, but he didn\rquote
t say anything. Instead, he rolled toward her and began with a gentle kiss. After the requisite five minutes, she spread her legs and he moved on top. He las}{\insrsid3227776 ted longer than usual,}{\insrsid2819449
enough for his first spurts and frenzied twitches to trigger her own. Hers was a small orgasm}{\insrsid7874609 ,}{\insrsid2819449 but Mark still glowed with smug satisfaction. He spooned her as they drifted off to sleep.
}{\insrsid7874609 The second tick }{\insrsid16327654 jarred.}{\insrsid2819449
}{\insrsid16327654
As her thoughts separated from dreams of missing final exams long past, they coagu
lated around a noise and gave it a name. Sirens. Not too distant but now fading away. Lisa was physically awake. Mark slumbered on. The return to the nightmare held no attraction, so Lisa slipped from the covers and padded down the hall.
Restless, the flicker of the screen saver drew her}{\insrsid943355 to the computer}{\insrsid16327654 . She surfed at random until memories of the day\rquote s earlier discovery r}{\insrsid3227776
ose from her hind brain. Why did such a sinful activity have}{\insrsid16327654 such a classy fa\'e7ade? Her curiosity tugged at her. Mark was still asleep\emdash where was the harm? With cat-like stealth, she repeated her path to the swingers site.
}{\insrsid14098763
She devoured every page, found some links, and followed them. Further links brought her to discussion boards and forums. She plunged in, reading posts both titillating and mundane.
Yawns eventually overcame her racing }{\insrsid943355 mind}{\insrsid14098763 . She slid back into bed next to Mark, to s}{\insrsid482515 leep}{\insrsid14098763 as long as she was able.
}{\insrsid2819449
}{\insrsid4546379 She next remembered the site during church. As they sang \'93Onward Christian Soldiers,\'94 she reflected on how normal the forum posters had seemed. They\rquote
d had the same cares and concerns for their families and friends as any others she knew. }{\insrsid943355 They shared s}{\insrsid4546379 imilar in-jokes and special connections as she found }{\insrsid12414061 elsewhere}{\insrsid4546379
. Where exactly was the sin in the swingers\rquote desires?}{\insrsid943355 }{\insrsid14098763
}{\insrsid15688966
}{\insrsid2649467 The next few ticks came fast and quiet.
}{\insrsid14098763 With Mark\rquote s business trip }{\insrsid7874609 lasting }{\insrsid14098763 the }{\insrsid943355 entire }{\insrsid14098763 following week}{\insrsid943355 , Lisa had time to play a}{\insrsid14098763
nd an internet playground at her fingertips. }{\insrsid7227354 She quickly realized that swinging held no real temptation for her. She wanted Mark
and only Mark in her bed. It was the thought of sex purely . . . purely for sex. For fun. Not because it was making love but for the sheer unadulterated pleasure of it.
Maybe she could have that.
}{\insrsid14098763 She practically dragged Mark to the floor as he walked in the door upon his return. As it was, she left him gasping for breath and explanations.}{\insrsid943355 He\rquote d come quickly, but she hadn\rquote
t relented, using her hands to arouse him for another round in which she found her own release. Only her own afterglow gave him the pause to speak.}{\insrsid14098763
}{\insrsid7874609
\'93What\rquote s gotten into you, Lisa?\'94
\'93You didn\rquote t like?\'94
}{\insrsid2109503 \'93Oh, I liked--\'94}{\insrsid7874609
\'93So we can do it again?\'94 she asked, lightly stroking his chest.
\'93Er, uh . . .\'94 Mark rolled away and muttered something about needing the bathroom. Lisa curled on her side,}{\insrsid15688966 satisfied. She felt naughty. C}{\insrsid7874609 aressing her own breast, }{\insrsid482515 she follow}{\insrsid15688966
ed the memory of Mark\rquote s touch.}{\insrsid7874609 }{\insrsid15688966 }{\insrsid16529141 She felt}{\insrsid7874609 no sin.
She seduced him twice more in subsequent weeks. Each time, his shocked surpr}{\insrsid3227776 ise}{\insrsid7874609 yielded to her ministrations. He curled up on his own side of the bed afterward.
She continued to surf when Mark wasn\rquote t around. }{\insrsid14119277 She only lurked, fascinated with the voyeuristic thrill.
}{\insrsid7874609 Until one day when she was click click click}{\insrsid15688966 ing}{\insrsid7874609 and didn\rquote t hear him come home. }{\insrsid14119277 She realized he was in the doorway to}{\insrsid15688966 o late}{\insrsid9719105 to claim }{
\insrsid611955 she was just}{\insrsid9719105 }{\insrsid611955 working on plans}{\insrsid9719105 for their retreat. Mark}{\insrsid15688966 didn\rquote t say anything. He}{\insrsid14119277 ju}{\insrsid15688966 st slipped away.}{\insrsid7874609
}{\insrsid14119277
She found him sitting on the edge of their bed in the dark. She sat next to him and reached for his hand. He recoiled.
\'93Am I not enough for you, Lisa? Don\rquote t I satisfy you in bed?\'94
\'93Oh, Mark, I }{\insrsid8001009 enjoy making love}{\insrsid14119277 with you!\'94
\'93Then why the porn?\'94
\'93It\rquote s not all porn. It\rquote s . . .\'94 She didn\rquote t really know how to describe what she was finding.
\'93I married you because you were a good church-going girl,\'94 Mark said. \'93I saw you in white at our wedding and I saw you as the mother of our children.\'94
\'93I did wear white at our wedding,\'94 Lisa commented. \'93Pure and untouched.\'94
Mark nodded and stood up. He paused in the doorway.
\'93}{\insrsid8740787 Pure then, but what now?}{\insrsid14119277 \'94
}{\insrsid11091773
Lisa remained in the shadows, unsure what to say.
}{\insrsid5844345
They maintained an uneasy truce through the weekend. Mark hogged the computer and Lisa cleaned house. As she washed dishes, she dreamed}{\insrsid537228 of seeing the }{\insrsid8740787 passion}{\insrsid537228 in his eyes again}{\insrsid5844345 .
Sunday morning she woke uncommonly early. She lay silently, listening to Mark breathe. When it became clear she wouldn\rquote t be able to return to sleep, she slid out and went for tea.
She wandered back to the computer, wondering if she dared touch the keys. Setting the tea down, she bumped the mouse and the }{\insrsid8745731 screen flashed bright. Mark hadn\rquote t log}{\insrsid15688966 ged off when he\rquote d come to bed.
}{\insrsid8745731 He also hadn\rquote t cleared his browser\rquote s history file.}{\insrsid5844345
}{\insrsid14119277
}{\insrsid8745731 Lisa was waiting when he stumbled into the kitchen for coffee.}{\insrsid14119277
}{\insrsid8745731
\'93Hypocrite,\'94 she said, her voice flat with fury. He snapped awake, staring at her.
\'93You were checking out the same sites,\'94 she spat.
\'93I wanted to see what you were looking at!\'94
}{\insrsid13126646
\'93You}{\insrsid15688966 spent a long time looking}{\insrsid2508751 ! }{\insrsid13126646 You must have liked it.\'94
Mark looked away. He refused to look back.
\'93We need to get ready for church,\'94}{\insrsid5661115 he mumbled, before turning and leaving.}{\insrsid16529141 Lisa was too stunned to say anything.}{\insrsid13126646
}{\insrsid16529141
}{\insrsid12072968 The next tick occurred}{\insrsid16529141 during the Prayer of Confession. She elbowed Mark just after the preacher had said that they all were sinners, in need of forgiveness. Mark didn\rquote
t look up from his clasped hands, but he stiffened. He finally talked when they got home.
\'93I\rquote m sorry, Lisa. I did enjoy it. I do enjoy it. But . . . but . . . it\rquote s not right.}{\insrsid6294472 \'94}{\insrsid16529141
}\pard \ql \li0\ri0\widctlpar\aspalpha\aspnum\faauto\adjustright\rin0\lin0\itap0\pararsid16529141 {\insrsid16529141 \'93Why? Why is it not right?\'94
\'93Because . . .}{\insrsid3227776 \'94}{\insrsid16529141 Mark trailed off.
\'93You know there\rquote s nothing wrong with it,\'94 Lisa said. \'93Not between husband and wife. And you like it when I let myself go sexually. When we let ourselves go! You know there\rquote s no sin and you like it!\'94
\'93But where does it end? What will it take to satisfy you? Orgies? Gangbangs? Swinging???\'94
}{\insrsid12072968 Lisa}{\insrsid16529141 fell silent. Mark looked aghast, then stormed out of the room. }{\insrsid6294472 Lisa let out a deep sigh. The tic}{\insrsid10382643 king of the clock on the mantle}{\insrsid6294472 filled the silence.
}{\insrsid16529141 Slowly, she got to her feet and followed him. He was sitting in the dark again.
\'93What do you want, Mark?}{\insrsid6294472 \'94 she asked quietly. \'93I love you and you know it. You enjoyed the wild sex. So what do you want?\'94}{\insrsid16529141
}\pard \ql \li0\ri0\widctlpar\aspalpha\aspnum\faauto\adjustright\rin0\lin0\itap0 {\insrsid16529141
}{\insrsid6294472 }{\insrsid14098763 \'93}{\insrsid6294472 I don\rquote t want to be married to a slut!\'94}{\insrsid14098763
\'93I\rquote m not a slut w}{\insrsid6294472 ith other people. I\rquote m not going to be.}{\insrsid14098763 }{\insrsid6294472 B}{\insrsid14098763 ut why can\rquote t I be }{\i\insrsid14098763\charrsid14098763 your}{\insrsid14098763 slut, in }{
\i\insrsid14098763\charrsid12072968 our}{\insrsid14098763 bedroom?\'94
}{\insrsid6294472 Mark didn\rquote t answer. He just stared at the floor. She watched him as minutes moved by. Finally he spoke, still not looking up.
\'93I married you because I thought we\rquote d make a great life together. I married you because I thought you }{\insrsid12072968 were a good woman.}{\insrsid3225306 }{\insrsid12072968 That you\rquote d be a good mother to our children someday. }{
\insrsid3225306 Instead, you\rquote re fantasizing about orgies and swingers.\'94}{\insrsid6294472
}{\insrsid3225306
}{\insrsid2649467 \'93I\rquote m not fantasizing about orgies and swingers. I only fantasize about you.\'94
}{\insrsid3225306 Mark still hadn\rquote t looked up. Lisa slipped back to the kitchen and sat by herself.}{\insrsid8793575
}{\insrsid3225306 She played the memories of }{\insrsid6373014 their marriage through her mind. They\rquote d been happy, but she\rquote d always felt something missing. }{\insrsid7227354 She hadn\rquote t wanted to be burdened with a baby }{
\insrsid2508751 as a result, despite Mark\rquote s pushes. He wanted the bride in white and the mother for his children. She\rquote d resisted. Why?}{\insrsid3225306
}{\insrsid6373014
Mark came down for dinner. They didn\rquote t talk much. At least not about anything important. As if nothing was askew.
}{\insrsid6294472
}{\insrsid6373014 In the middle of the night, Lisa woke up.}{\insrsid6294472
}{\insrsid6373014
}{\insrsid6249568 It was the final tick. }{\insrsid6373014 She knew. The only question was whether Mark would agree.
Lisa slowly pulled the bedcovers down. Mark stirred an}{\insrsid6249568 d rolled onto his back. T}{\insrsid6373014 hat made it easier. }{\insrsid7022777 She paused to p}{\insrsid2649467 ull her nightgown off and then }{\insrsid7022777 slid down the b
ed. Lisa lightly placed her hand on Mark\rquote s}{\insrsid6373014 thigh. }{\insrsid7022777 He}{\insrsid6373014 slept on. }{\insrsid10897825 S}{\insrsid12090555
he freed his soft cock from his pajamas. Then she leaned over and gently kissed the tip. Growing bolder, she opened her mouth and slid his cock all the way in.}{\insrsid6373014
}{\insrsid12090555
As she licked and sucked, Mark slowly hardened. She wasn\rquote t quite sure when exactly he awoke, but she knew he was conscious long before his hands came down to caress her hair.}{\insrsid2308315
She began to bob her head in earnest, hoping enthusiasm would make up for her lack of experience.}{\insrsid12090555
}{\insrsid7022777
Mark let out a gargled cry just before his cock twitched and the first spurt hit the back of her throat. Surprised, Lisa pulled back. Mark\rquote
s second spurt hit her cheek and the third splattered her breasts. She looked down and chuckled at the sight of white goo across her skin.
She heard Mark chuckle too. He was glowing and wide-eyed. He also wasn\rquote t going soft. With a little effort, Lisa worked his pajama bottoms off and then straddled him. Mark was still ha}{\insrsid6249568 rd as she impaled herself}{\insrsid7022777
.}{\insrsid2184560 She smeared }{\insrsid10897825 his semen around her breasts as}{\insrsid2184560 she raised and lowered her}{\insrsid6249568 body}{\insrsid2184560
. Mark reached down and held her hips. She gave him her best wanton stare and began to meet his hard thrusts stroke for stroke. The rest of the world beyond his cock, his eyes, and the sensations in
her body faded away. Then the pleasure exploded and time stopped.}{\insrsid7022777
}{\insrsid2184560
A}{\insrsid10897825 fter, a}{\insrsid2184560 s they lay side by side, cuddling and regaining their breath, Lisa }{\insrsid75641 spoke}{\insrsid2184560 .
}{\insrsid6373014
}{\insrsid2184560 }{\insrsid2981692 \'93For }{\insrsid6373014 our retreat}{\insrsid2981692 weekend, we\rquote re leaving our home behind. We\rquote re leaving our families and our responsibilities and our church. It\rquote
s just us for three days. So I want to leave }{\insrsid6829908 our}{\insrsid2981692 inhibitions and the moral judgments behind too. I want }{\insrsid746955 us to be free of the baggage of our regular lives and leave everything }{\insrsid2981692
behind.\'94
Mark looked }{\insrsid6373014 wary}{\insrsid2981692 and gave an ambiguous nod. }{\insrsid3227776 Lisa}{\insrsid2981692 took a deep breath and continued.
\'93And }{\insrsid746955 when I say leave everything}{\insrsid2981692 , I also mean }{\insrsid2184560 we leave}{\insrsid2981692 the birth control behind.\'94
Mark met her eyes, surprised. }{\insrsid3227776 Lisa}{\insrsid2981692 slowly and deliberately nodded her head. Mark }{\insrsid2184560 looked relieved}{\insrsid2981692 for the first time in weeks.
\'93}{\insrsid2184560 Are you sure?}{\insrsid2981692 \'94}{\insrsid2184560 he aske}{\insrsid2981692 d.
\'93}{\insrsid6570694 It\rquote s not }{\insrsid8793575 one or the other}{\insrsid6570694 . I can be a mom }{\i\insrsid6570694\charrsid6570694 and}{\insrsid6570694 a wanton woman for my husband}{\insrsid2184560 .\'94}{\insrsid2981692
}{\insrsid2184560
He }{\insrsid6570694 nodded slowly, understanding dawning in his eyes}{\insrsid2184560 .
}{\insrsid4546379
}{\insrsid6829908 The weekend was a blur. Th}{\insrsid537228 ey only left the room for meals}{\insrsid6829908 and once for }{\insrsid3752872 lube}{\insrsid6829908 . }{\insrsid3752872 When }{\insrsid537228 it }{\insrsid3752872 ended, t}{\insrsid4852982
hey departed}{\insrsid4546379 early enough to make the late church service. At Mark\rquote s insistence, Lisa had cleaned the semen from her hair, cheeks, breasts, }{\insrsid746955 and }{\insrsid4546379 ass. With guilty pleasure, she hadn\rquote
t douched.}{\insrsid943355 The thought of Mark\rquote s }{\insrsid8793575 seed }{\insrsid943355 inside made her giggle.}{\insrsid6373014 She\rquote d been off the pill for a few weeks and that thought felt fine.}{\insrsid4546379
They held hands during the hymn, singing \'93Glory, Glory, Glory\'94 loudly }{\insrsid943355 and }{\insrsid4546379 with gusto. }{\insrsid943355 Mark couldn\rquote t stop smiling, and neither could Lisa}{\insrsid4546379 . At Mark\rquote
s insistence, they\rquote d already scheduled their next retreat.}{\insrsid943355 She was already counting the minutes.}{\insrsid4546379
-fin-
}