DISCLAIMER:- The following text is sexually explicit and contains depictions of sexual acts that have been classified by the surgeon general as potentially dangerous and unhealthy. You must be a broad minded adult to read the text, and you must not make this text available to minors or to any person who does not wish to view it. Unprotected sexual relations with unknown partners is hazardous and we urge the use of condoms and safe sex at all times.

At the time I first started talking to Jessica it was the fall of 1999. She was a student at Washburn University in Topeka, Kansas and I was living about 15-20min from there. I resided just outside of a small town living on a farm with my parents. It was sort of a rough time for me because I was in the separated of my wife of nearly 4 years and was about to enter the fun process of divorce. So initially I was just looking for company. Someone to talk too. But what I found was much more and could not be helped.

Jessica revealed to me over the course of several nights’ conversations on the Internet that she was originally from Tennessee. She had moved to Topeka to attend school, and thought the distance would allow her to concentrate on her education. She also told me that she was in her mid 20's and was not the typical college student as she had been married and since divorced. The result of the marriage was two beautiful daughters, which unfortunately were with their father in Tennessee. She would talk about how much she missed them and how that was the entire reason she was here for school. So that she could get a degree and return to Tennessee where she would be able to obtain a far better job than before and perhaps actually able to afford and take custody of her girls back.

And that is how we started. I was honest with her. Something I had never really experienced in the previous months of trying to talk to or meet someone to get my mind off my soon to be ex-wife. Jessica stirred something in me. I just couldn't explain it and what started to be just casual talks every other night or so ended up being several hour conversations about everything under that sun. I can even remember our conversations, but I do know they went on into the weee hours of the mornings at times.

That is when it happened. Somehow the Internet friendship was starting to develop beyond its intended boundary. I can't remember who first brought it up but late one night (or early morning as it may be) we decided to meet at an all night restaurant in Topeka that was close to the campus. I really didn't feel like traveling into town that night but somehow I did it. As I was driving I couldn't explain why or what my intentions were only that I just had to meet this woman that was stirring so much emotion and affection inside of me.

I arrived at the restaurant and nervously walked into the entrance. Lucky for both her and I the place was empty except for a couple sitting across the room, and the waitress that greeted you at the door. As had been arranged I wore my K-State sweatshirt so she could identify me. And there she was. She was sitting in a booth sipping on a cup of coffee as she motioned me over. I waved and slowly made my way to her.

Having never discussed our looks it was more than a pleasant surprise to discover that Jessica was very attractive. I will do my best to describe her but understand nothing will compare with the actual image that was planted in my mind the first glance.

So there she sat. Jessica's hair was a light brown, and she wore it strait. It hung just past her shoulders and had hints of blonde highlights in it. To say she had an attractive face would be an understatement. She was by no means average. She had the most attractive face I had seen in many years. Oh sure I have seen far more beautiful women in magazines and on TV, but never directly across the table from me. She was beautiful to say the least. Her eyes were a greenish shade of hazel and her skin was just as soft and smooth looking as I would expect on a dream date. But this wasn't a dream date. This was just a meet for coffee date, and not really a date at that. See Jessica and I never discussed getting together, or relationships. All we ever really discussed was my career and her college. (The two are related but I will leave that part out to preserve a little privacy.)

So I was awe struck in her presence and greatly enjoyed the attractive woman’s presence I was blessed with. I know her lips were moving but I seriously can remember words coming out. I was too far lost in la la land. I was daydreaming about everything I would love to do to such a woman, and really wondered why I had never said or done anything to turn a conversation to looks so I could have been a little better prepared for my current situation.

As luck would have it Jessica must have sensed my daydreaming and she just stopped talking. She sat there mid-sentence and asked what was I thinking. I don't know what possessed me but I actually responded and started speaking my mind. This was new territory for me. I usually kept feelings inside but with her I opened up. I just put it out there. "I can't believe I am here actually, you are the most attractive woman I have ever met face to face and I can't get over that fact. Doubt that I ever will."

I do remember saying that to her, and funny thing is. I meant it. She really was.

Well the rest of the morning was blur. We just sat and talked for a few hours over her coffee, and eventually my breakfast. That was perhaps the best first date of my life and yet it was far from a traditional date, and ended rather dull. With us going our separate ways.

Jessica and I continued to talk on the Internet until one night when everything inside on me came out. I just couldn't hold it in. I was in lust with this woman and I needed more than a friendship could provide. So I took a chance. Late one night as we were talking I asked if I could be blunt and not freak her out. My biggest fear was losing her as a "friend" yet I also felt I just had to tell her how I felt.

SO here I was with permission to speak my mind. And out it came. "I so want to be more than friends with you!". As I got no response from her I felt a little uneasy but I kept it going and said "I have never wanted to sexually please someone more than I want to with you, right at this moment, and if I could just get the chance to even eat you to orgasms I would be the happiest man alive." There was a very long pause. The longer it took her to respond the more sure I became that she was really questioning what little relationship we did have, and was thinking of a way to let me down softly. But what she said next still blows my mind.

"If you want to pick me up, you can eat me"

WOW. I was frozen as I stared at the screen. Was this real I thought? I sure hoped like hell it was. But had more doubt that you can imagine. Before I could really think about things there we were exchanging her address and directions for me to come get her. I was so excited and nervous all at once. AND I LOVED IT! The drive into Topeka went by in a blur. I just couldn't wait to get to her. To assure that this was really going to happen. In my mind all I could think of was here I ma going to pick out the most beautiful woman I have ever actually known and for a sexual encounter. I just couldn't believe it!! I still can't.

As I pulled up to the house I was still a little unsure. Part of me thought, "what if this is a fake address", luckily it was not. Just as I pulled up to the curb from the side of the house she emerged. She was wearing a long jacket and jeans from what I could tell.

She climbed into my truck and said simply "where we going". Home. We drove straight to my parents house as I explained along the way that I have never in my life be in a situation like this. But that I truly did want to take advantage of the situation since she was willing, and she was because her presence said that. We pulled into the driveway of my parent’s home when she started talking more matter of factly, and this conversation continued all the way up and into my bedroom.

"I'm not on birth control, and therefore don't want to do anything that could have lasting results if you know what I mean". I did. I assured her that I was completely satisfied just to have her in my presence and since I promised to eat her to orgasms I figured I should at least make good on my promise that got us here in the first place. We slowly moved to the bed and sat down. As she removed her jacket I could see that she was wearing a silk sleep shirt underneath. It was adorable, and I just couldn't believe this was happening. We started to kiss, and before I remember how or when it happened there we were laying on the bed. She was naked except for the sleep shirt, and I was trying to give her the most powerful orgasms of her life. I do remember how wet she was and how much I would have loved to slid up and put my cock into her. But that wasn't the deal, and I sure as hell didn't want to fuck up any chance in hell I had at keeping this woman in my life. She was so beautiful as she lay there. I ate her to a few orgasms before we finally fell asleep.

When we awoke I was forced to ask if she enjoyed herself. "I have never felt like, or done anything like this before." "I just need to get back to town. Will you please take me." And I did. It was a quiet drive. Nothing was said that I can remember by either of us the entire time, and as I pulled up to let her out I didn't get so much as a peck on the cheek. Jessica just exited the truck and said "talk to you soon". With that she walked away.

My mind was spinning all week. I never heard from her that next week. And I remember just a few "hi, how are you"'s over the following week as well. So as you can imagine I was feeling pretty low. This in not at all what I was hoping would happen. I just wanted to at least talk to her, to see what was wrong. That is when it happened.

One night I was sitting at the computer bored as hell hoping for something to occur when it did. And did it happen. "Sorry for ignoring you lately, but with finals and all I just didn't have time to get much of anything done". I was floored. I was just happy we were talking again, and now my mind was flooding with thoughts and questions, but before I could but anything to actually words she responded and wrote to me: "why don't we get a room for the weekend, and we can spend the entire time getting to know one another?" Yes. That is all I could respond with. "Yes".

I asked for her phone number or for her to call me and she did. She called me and we talked about when I could come pick her up. Within a few seconds i was walking out that door and on my way to get her. We had no real plans but it was going to be a great weekend this I was sure of! I arrived and picked her up. It was a little surprising to me that she wanted a weekend with me. Yet I didn't see a purse or a bag or anything with her. A little odd yet, what did I care. I was just overtly thrilled that I was even in this situation.

We drove around for a little while until we came across a hotel/motel. I went inside and arranged for a room. We were a little lucky in that they had a suite available that had a large hot tub in it. I hoped we could put it to use, and therefore paid for 2 nights stay in the room. I would like to say that we went straight to the room but we didn't. When I got back to the truck I asked if she wanted to go get dinner before we settled in for the evening? We did. The dinner was ok, but all I could think of the entire time was just how lucky I was at the moment. And I didn't want her to forget it. I was the luckiest man alive that night. Not just to be in here presence but to be able to carry the knowledge of things to come. It was overwhelming, it really was.

So we finished dinner and went to check out the room. It was your typical hotel suite with the exception of a large hot tub located in a side room off of the main entry into the suite itself. Seeing it I asked if she wanted to try it out. We did. We spend about 2-3 hours sitting in the tub just talking and feeling on one another. Looking back I know that I was the aggressor. She was far more passive and just allowed me to do what I wanted. She never protested, and let my hands and tongue wonder her body. This was the first time that I really got to enjoy her entire body and it's beauty. Her breasts were large enough to be more than a handful, and oh how soft I remember them being. The biggest thing that I remember about her breasts was her nipples. Prior to that I had never really seen "mommy" nipples. I mean they were large, fat looking. It was as if they were about 3/8" across and stuck out no less than 1/4" when hard. They were the biggest and most beautiful things I had ever seen. I do remember her commenting something to the effect "you can blame the girls for those, if not for babies they would still be beautiful nipples.". How wrong she was. They were beautiful just as they were, and I was in heaven.

We eventually got out of the tub and dried off. We moved into the bedroom and I just couldn't wait to get my hands all over her. I still remember the image of her lying on the bed. It fills my mind to this very day. Even after all of these years. I slowly kissed her. I know in her mid the events are not mirrored but in my mind it was the longest and best seduction I had ever attempted on a woman. I slowly worked my way from head to toe kissing and licking everything I could get my tongue on. Then I started to make my way into a place I never wanted to forget. I started to work my way onto her clit when she more or less grabs my head and says to me "that feels good but right now I need you in me!"

This was the moment I had been waiting for. The first time I entered her we were positioned missionary and I was greatly enjoying every sensation she had to offer. It felt great to be inside of her. But I could honestly say that it was not the tightest thing I had ever been inside of. I am an averagely hung guy my just over 6" was doing all it could to feel the inside of this beautiful woman. I just wasn’t feeling what I thought I should be feeling. It felt loose to me. So I decided to switch it up and try another position. I can't remember the countless positions we went thru. She must have thought I was a skilled lover attempting to get in all of the Kamasutra at one session but the reality was I just wanted to make it feel better, and I was not having a lot of luck. That is until it happened.
I was laying on my right side. She was on her back, and I had her left leg over my side. It was as if I was entering her from behind but we were both lying down. Now that the mental image is set understand this. The entire time up until this moment all I had heard from her was a few soft moans, and the occasional grunt. But somehow I had finally pushed a button or turned a switch on in her. Because out of nowhere and during mid-stroke she says to me "you better not stop now because if you keep going, I am going to cum!". She speaks.. I could not believe it. Not only was she enjoying my efforts but also she was about to cum. This made me extremely happy. Perhaps a little too happy because just as the thoughts were running thru my mind of giving her an orgasm. I started to realize that my own was now fast approaching. That is when I just up and started a new tradition in my life. I knew I was going to cum and I wanted to let her know when I did. I continued to piston in and out of her. Hoping that she would cum before I did. But that just wasn't meant to be. I could not hold back anymore and was about to blow my load. I will never forget for the rest of my life the following conversation, and know now that there is a reason for everything.

"I’m about to cum" I said

"I really can't stop,” I said

"Where do you want me to cum?" I asked...

And her response...

"Anywhere you want" she said.. And that as they say is history. Never in my life have I nor will I ever remember the exact moment that I created a life. But just as her words hit me the spurts of my cum entered into her. I was totally in heaven, and enjoyed the experience greatly. I was so thankful that I didn't have to pull out and ruin things. I was so glad that I was able to finally get it to feel good inside of her. But never did it hit me. And I mean never did it hit me until exactly the first week of September the following year when I was online one evening. Just looking thru junk email and opening forwarded crap when I came across an email I had to read twice.

It was a letter from Jessica's mother. In it she had said that she would love for me to call her and attached was her phone number. Now up until that moment I had never given thought to the events that occurred that night at the hotel. But reality hit home as I spoke with Jessica's mom over the phone about the beautiful baby boy that was now alive as the result of it. I wanted to speak to Jessica, but her mother explained to me her hesitance. Jessica was scared to tell me she said and was worried as to how I would react. Her mother just wanted to do what was right and had tracked me down, which she said wasn't hard to do.

I did finally get a hold of Jessica. We arranged for me to make a trio out to see the baby. She assured me that I was the only person she had slept with for an entire year or two, and I do believe her. I guess you could say we created a child out of lust. Not love but if you could have seen what I did when I first met her holding my son you would know that it ended up as a true love child. I know that she will care and love that child more than anything in the world. I don't doubt that at all.

But here is where the weird and yet good/bad part comes in. See Jessica related to me that she loved her two girls that were with their father. What upset Jessica more than anything was that the girls were not with her. She then put it out there for me said this "I wanted this child and I was afraid to let you know that I was pregnant. I know it is along way from where you live so as long as your understanding all I ask is that in exchange for you staying out of our lives, I will not pursue any sort of paternity action". "I just want to raise this baby on my own, and would rather he didn't have to have a father coming in and out of his life!".

I agreed with her. Although over the years I do wonder what he is like, if anything like me. I get a huge comfort knowing that he will grow up completely loved and taken care of by his (now practicing) attorney mother, and not have to go thru the worries of a dad coming in and out of his life. Some may think I’m full of shit or nuts but I really think it is for the best that he will be allowed to grow up knowing just love in a household, regardless of if he will ever know me as his father.
I do though in the back of my mind wonder when if ever the knock will occur, and a door will open to "I’m looking for my dad!?". But until then.